JoDee Luna's Blog, page 38
March 12, 2012
The Black Hole of Lost Love
My recent painting (shown above) inspired this poem:
"The Black Hole of Lost Love"
by Elya Filler
Within the black hole
It has been foretold
Time has no effect
On the young or old
The lingering ghosts
Of ones left behind
Wander for ages
Alone, deaf and blind
With fire and ice
They are much the same
Equally caustic
Unable to tame
They whisper regrets
And silently grieve
For the loves they lost
For the loves they leave
*You can visit my blog at http://elyafiller.wordpress.com/
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March 11, 2012
Life Interrupted
In 1Kings 19:11-13, the prophet, Elijah, discovers that God's majesty comes in an unexpected way. Today, I'm grateful for God's gentle whispers in the midst of life interrupted.
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March 10, 2012
The Pensive Life
I used to be a high-powered extrovert—ministry wife, public speaker, crowd lover.
Then my life drastically changed—divorcee, single parent, college student.
The pursuit of popularity diminished in importance as my pensive life blossomed with new beginnings.
Now, instead of returning home to 30 voice messages, I sit down and chat with my husband.
Instead of rushing around on weekends, I relish in Saturdays spent writing, blogging, and creating art.
The Pensive Life
I will never give up this wonderful way of living for any amount of fame or fortune.
Serenity soothes my soul and creativity swirls through my thoughts like forest fairies at play.
This lifestyle affords me many benefits, some of which I list below:
The creation of new art pieces, as I chase whimsy around my art room
Travel excursions with my husband, as we stir our creative juices with impromptu photo shoots
Invigorating hikes with Dad
Long lunches with Mom
Artistic exploration sessions with my daughter
Deep discussions with my son
My pursuit of a pensive lifestyle has made me change my mind about a few things:
24-7 connection is overrated
The quest for celebrity status to sell books drives me crazy
Sacrificing relationships in pursuit of things is ridiculous
Submitting to the control and agendas of authoritarian leaders is repulsive and a real creativity crusher
My daughter, Elya, acrylic painting
The pensive life doesn't just happen. We must make a concerted effort to prioritize what we love or others will do it for us. Here are a few tips I've discovered to be helpful:
Jot down your thoughts first thing in the morning before the day swallows you whole
Choose to live in a state of self-awareness instead of running on life's treadmill
Reassess your priorities on a regular basis to determine what is most important to you
Scratch out activities you do from motivations of guilt or shame
Don't over schedule
Have realistic expectations as to what you can accomplish in any given day, week, or month
Strategically plan your career compliance – if your work requires you to volunteer, decide what duties best suite you.
Model creative, independent living so your children will develop their own artistic identities as they watch you pursue yours
When you feel resentful of others, it's a good indication that you're doing too much for them. Pull back!
I'm curious, how do you manage to maintain a pensive life? I would love to hear from you. I invite you to leave a comment or link a post.
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March 9, 2012
The Extraction
When shards of life slice through our souls and lodge in our hearts, character flaws form and fester around these painful experiences:
We find ourselves overcompensating with ambition for injuries to self-esteem suffered in childhood.
We grow suspicious and cynical because of abandonment suffered from disloyal relationships.
Negative experiences with churches, employers, or organizations sully our trust in systems.
The loss of loved ones hobbles our will to live.
These are but a few of the host of traumas that we humans might suffer.
In time, rejection follows:
We reject living because of our loss.
We reject ourselves because of our shame.
Others reject us because of our flaws.
We cry for healing, and then God takes out his tweezers.
If you've ever had even a tiny splinter removed, you know how painful it is to have someone dig around in the infection. The temptation to leave the shard alone is great.
Yet, throughout my life, I've noticed a pattern—rejection from others often helps me to see the character flaws that formed around my loss—ways I've compensated for my injuries. Yes, what's wrong with me is often clearer to others than it is to me. Character flaws then help me to identify the wound.
The Extraction
When do you know you are ready to undergo this process of having God remove the shard?
When the pain becomes greater than the pleasure of whatever you used to dull your pain.
I don't know about you, but I would rather be a person who holds the hand of someone going through the extraction than a critic who causes more injury. It's easy to point out the flaws, but messengers of God's grace look beyond the obvious and see the wounds.
*I took the photo in Buenos Aires, Argentina while visiting my son, Josiah, who was working there a couple of summers ago.
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March 8, 2012
Sing to Me The Seasons
Sing to me of the spring's new bloom
Where rose buds wake inside the womb
Laughing lilies in the lagoon
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March 7, 2012
Paint by Ruler
Last week, I did an entire painting using a ruler. It was actually a lot of fun and an interesting and easy way to practice mixing colors. READ THE ENTIRE POST…
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March 6, 2012
The Loss of Innocence
"I want to write poetry that heals the soul."
Last night, my daughter, Elya, expressed this desire after she read her poem, "The Loss of Innocence," to me. She is exploring the idea that self-forgiveness breaks the cycle of shame that perpetuates addiction and abuse. Her desire is for those who have suffered from abuse as children will receive the grace to heal so that they will not abuse others. I like the way she thinks and do believe that one of the most powerful forms of creative living is to use our artistic talents to help others. You can read more of her poetry at http://elyafiller.wordpress.com/.
Photo by Josiah Filler, Kruger Safari, South Africa
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March 5, 2012
March 4, 2012
"Oh Little Sparrow" Mixed Media Collage
Whenever I feel afraid, I remember the little sparrows in Matthew 10:29:
"Are not two sparrows sold for a cent? And yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father."
This scripture reminds me of the intimate care our Heavenly Father provides for us. So in order to help process my grief over the recent loss of loved ones, I created a mixed media collage I titled, "Oh Little Sparrow."
I'd like to share the steps for how to make this mixed media collage.
Begin with a weathered frame. Apply scrapbook pieces by using Golden Gell Medium.
I printed my poem onto Ivory Fine Parchment Paper by Southworth.
I like to tear my paper by using the glass from the frame because you can see where you want to make the tear.
Apply Grumbacher burnt umber acrylic paint to the corners where the background will show through.
Apply Golden Gel Medium to the back of the scrapbook paper and to the canvas:
Apply the Golden Gel Medium to the front of the poem:
Use Golden Gel Medium to apply various scrapbook papers and embellishments. I used the following:
K&Company Feuilles/Hojas Designer Paper (I bought this at Michaels)
K&Company Brenda Walton Designer Paper
Jim Holtz "idea-ology"
Apply Jim Holtz distress ink pads to age the paper:
Enjoy you mixed media collage project. Here are some close-ups:
Matthew 10:29
Hold On!
Check out this other Mixed Media Collage Post.
scripture is NASB http://www.lockman.org/
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March 3, 2012
A Grief Endured
This morning I received another phone call informing me of another precious friend who has died. This is the fifth person in the last two weeks. From ages 19 to 82, each person has left behind loved ones whose grief knows no bounds. I wish I could alleviate some of the suffering these families are enduring. This post is my meager attempt to do so.
This morning I pray for these families to receive the grace to endure their losses. I also remember the story of two sisters, Martha and Mary, who grieved the death of their brother, Lazarus.
Jesus said to her [Mary], "I am the resurrection and the life; he who believes in Me will live even if he dies, and everyone who lives and believes in Me will never die. Do you believe this?" – John 11:25-26
This morning I confronted this question, once again, "Do you believe this?"
I say that I do until someone I love lies silent on a velvety cushion. Then in that moment, I face the inevitable reality I seek to distract myself from with all of the many activities crammed into my days:
All any of us are is a breath away from eternity.
This morning I weep with those who weep. I remember you who must endure this agonizing separation until you reunite with your loved ones in heaven. I join your whispers of "I believe."
The scripture is from the New American Standard Version http://www.lockman.org/
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