Melanie Surani's Blog, page 274

kindlecoverdisasters:“…you’ve got one of my covers… and I did...

kindlecoverdisasters:

“…you’ve got one of my covers… and I did NOT give you permission to use it. It is copyrighted material. Please remove it at once, as you are in violation of copyright law. The cover is THE BEST LAID PLANS.”

Hi, James. I’m sorry you perceive my reposting your book cover as copyright infringement. By way of apology I’ve used a photo of you I found on your author’s page to make you into a kick-ass Robocop. I trust this matter is now brought to a close.

Yours sincerely,

Kindle Cover Disasters

Most people would welcome the advertisement. No such thing as bad publicity or something.

http://treasuryofaghostgirl.tumblr.co...

http://treasuryofaghostgirl.tumblr.com/post/114290994727/chescaleigh-she-tattooed-half-her-face-and-youd:

chescaleigh:

She Tattooed Half Her Face And You’d Never Know It. Her Skills Are Just That Good.

Meet Samira Omar.

The 17-year-old was the victim of a horrific bullying incident. A group of girls threw boiling water on her, leaving her badly burned and covered in scars and…

This is amazing!

I’ve seen this picture before. Apparently, a lion belonged to a...

I’ve seen this picture before. Apparently, a lion belonged to a king of somewhere, and when the lion died, he was heartbroken. The guy he hired to do the taxidermy apparently had never seen a live lion before and this was the best he could do.

I could look up the actual story and get some real specifics, but that isn’t the point. I can only imagine myself loving my cat so much that I couldn’t bear to bury her when she died.

[image error]

This is Mittens. She lived to be 17 years old — I got her as a week-old kitten when I was 9. Mittens bonded with me and basically nobody else. She followed me, slept in my bed, gave me little nibbles when she was super happy. But then her kidneys started failing, she got a touch of the diabetes, and my parents gave me that horrible phone call: “Listen, Melanie, we’ve got to put her to sleep so she doesn’t suffer.”

I agreed. 

Now, in reality, my mom buried her in the backyard. But let’s suppose I’d hired a taxidermist. Maybe a nice pose like she’s waiting for me to come home. I could still rub her little noggin and though she’d be gone, I could say goodbye gradually. I don’t know. But then the taxidermist calls me up to say he’s done and I go to his office to find 

this piece of shit.

That’s not Mittens. You just took my sweet little kitty, mutilated her body and sold her back to me? 

(So, in order to get that second picture, I had to look up the story. Here it is: http://www.themarysue.com/lion-taxidermy/)

Instead of seeing the stuffed cat I’d grown to love so much I can’t stop uncontrollably weeping, I have this doofy monstrosity mocking me every time I walk through the door. “That’s what you get for being friends with an animal! Hur!”

Anyway, thinking back to that 18th century king, I can imagine him shaking his head (because lions are big) and thinking, “What the hell am I gonna do with Captain Snuffles now?”

katbot:Just saw a man literally run into the subway doors. Face plant. And he still missed the...

katbot:

Just saw a man literally run into the subway doors. Face plant.

And he still missed the train. My heart goes out to you while you wait thirty minutes for the next F train, sir.

Awwwww lol!

historicaltimes:A technician works on broken hands from the...

historicaltimes:

A technician works on broken hands from the waxworks of Madame Tussauds, 1950s

via reddit

Some people dislike wax museums because, let’s face it, some of them suck. There’s something so eerie about this picture, though — all those hands. These are lifelike at the worst possible time. … like one of them will twitch and that guy will constantly question whether or not he saw it.

Just Charlie Chaplin pulling a face.

Just Charlie Chaplin pulling a face. 

Fuck You, Clean Reader: Authorial Consent Matters

Fuck You, Clean Reader: Authorial Consent Matters:

  There exists a new app called Clean Reader. The function of Clean Reader is to scrub the profanity from e-books. Their tagline: “Read books. Not profanity.” You can dial in how much of the p…

I couldn’t agree more with this article. Some of my fiction has more profanity than others. Some of my novels have sex scenes. Some have pretty upsetting violence. But the thing is, you’re allowed to read what you want. You can put my book down and write a scathing review warning others of the f-words therein. But then i can write my novel with the vocabulary and content the story requires. 

perfectharmonyoflife:@hmmm… yes.

perfectharmonyoflife:

@

hmmm… yes.

tastefullyoffensive:(photo via mattbongo)I always thought...

tastefullyoffensive:

(photo via mattbongo)

I always thought something was up with this line. That and FML over at 14th street led me to believe the DNR station in Brooklyn wasn’t messing around

tastefullyoffensive:by John McNameeNew York, you’re the worst at...