Niall Teasdale's Blog, page 6

Loyalty, coming soon

The sixth Death’s Handmaiden book, Loyalty, will be out next week. Not exactly sure when; the limiting factor is likely to be the cover since I’ve only just come up with an idea for it, and it’s a bit complicated.

In other news, I bought myself a present. It’s a 32″ UHD (4K) monitor for my graphics/gaming PC. It’s awesome. I should’ve done this years ago.

In other other news, I just got a marketing email from my ISP which says I’m in the top 20% of data users in the Wigan area. That sounds pretty major, but it’s Wigan…

Massive Eurovision Upset!

This made it onto Saturday Night Live last night, so it has to be international news, right?

Ah, the Eurovision Song Contest, that takes me back. When I was a kid, Eurovision used to be a must-watch for the entire family. Of course, when I was a kid, when Eurovision was on, nothing else was. We only had two channels worth watching, and Eurovision totally consumed the BBC. However, back then there was a degree of enthusiasm for watching it. How bad would the UK’s song be? How much of a horrendous dirge would the French give us this year? Are we about to see another ABBA? (Yes, for those unaware, ABBA got their start on Eurovision. For those who don’t know who ABBA is: bugger off you Millennial bastards, I feel old enough as it is!)

Then it got silly. See, it’s the Eurovision song contest, not the European song contest. Eurovision is a commercial entity supplying broadcasts to 56 countries across Europe, North Africa, and the Middle East. So, countries started turning up which were not European, and that was weird. Also, the UK gave up bothering. We used to try. Cliff Richard was the UK entry twice! Then we gave up. Would we win became ‘Maybe we won’t get zero points this year.’ It did not help at all when it became possible to add a public vote to the tally (it all used to be voting panels, and it used to be hilarious watching the presenters worry over whether they could get to all the people they needed to by telephone). The UK hasn’t won Eurovision is 25 years (and often with good reason).

So, what was the massive upset last night? The UK came second! Ukraine won because Putin, but the UK got second! It’s the best result we’ve had in 20 years and, let’s face facts, we would’ve won if not for the war. That’s not sour grapes from a Brit (because I didn’t even know the thing was on until I saw the news video on YouTube), the UK was in first place and Ukraine was in fifth, and then they tallied the public vote to add to the judged one. Basically, Putin put Ukraine in first place. I listened to the two entries just now and they’re both about as good as each other. The Ukrainian one is a bit more my thing, to be honest. Not enough of my thing for me to want to listen to it twice, but a bit more than the UK one.

Next year, the show is supposed to come from Ukraine. The winner hosts next year. It’s an expensive proposition (like hosting the Olympics or the World Cup). Ireland won three times in a row long ago and it almost bankrupted the Irish public TV company. Somehow, I think they may have to switch venues even if the war’s over by then. Wherever it is, I can almost guarantee that the UK’s song will place a lot lower than second. And it’s also pretty likely I won’t know it’s happening until the day after.

This post was brought to you by ‘random thoughts over lunch break.’

Okay, I’m Going to Do This…

I recently finished the first draft of the next Death’s Handmaiden novel (Loyalty, I think). On Wednesday, actually. I’ve ben working on plotting out that succubus thing I mentioned since then, but I decided to read through Loyalty as it stands to see whether there are any major problems or bits I should add. There are some scheduling issues that will mean the book won’t be out before June anyway…

Upshot of this is that I’m putting a hold on the succubus thing because I just haven’t enough story to make it viable, and I’m going to delay Loyalty a bit further because, well, I want to write more Nava & Co. So, you’ll probably looking at late July for the next book, but it’ll be a bit longer when it appears. Maybe a lot longer and a dollar or so more expensive, but I’m going to see how long the added story actually works out before deciding on that.

To hold you over, a couple of graphics you won’t have seen. (The second is NSFW.)

Nava in Super-Spy Mode Amara, the succubus

Awesome Anime Idea!

The exclamation mark is ironic.

Okay, so, I was watching one of Mother’s Basements’ old ‘worst anime of…’ episodes and this genius idea for an isekai came to me. See what you think.

Protag-kun is eaten by an alligator while of holiday in Australia (because truck-kun is so last year) and wakes up in another world where your status is defined by your psychic power. Amazingly, our hero is not the most powerful psychic in the world, but has somehow got himself a place at the prestigious Awesome Psychics Academy because reasons. There, he learns that your power is decided in psychic duels, which are basically staring contests were two minds battle for supremacy. Obviously, he wants to avoid these and he manages to for almost an entire episode until the biggest bully in the school calls him out. Here, our boy’s true power becomes apparent: due to him being the protagonist of an isekai anime, he has no discernible personality. So, when the battle starts, the bully finds himself lost in a featureless void, falls into a coma, and remains that way for at least an episode, thus handing the duel to the hero. Being a mind-numbingly boring otaku with no life is a superpower!

Obviously, all the girls want to bang our hero like a Salvation Army drum owing to his superlative power. Oh, he falls over and ends up grabbing at least one boob at least once per episode. Maybe he can psychically fall over and grab psychic boob to spice things up.

What do you think?

Male protagonist, so you know I won’t be writing it. But if there’s an anime producer out there looking for the worst anime of 2023, I’m willing to talk terms.

This has been a Boring Sunday Blog Post, courtesy of YouTube.

Mind Blown…

This is just a silly post. Don’t get your hopes up.

There’s an anime I’m watching because it plays while I’m digesting me evening meal. It is a terribly average, Slice of Life thing about some girls training to be healers. They heal though singing, so the show has one massive advantage over some others: the songs are always subtitled.

The third episode dropped today and I started it off with little expectations of a stunning watch. The girls are about to take a test which will decide the future of their careers, so I was thinking ‘Angst! Angst! Here comes the angst!’ And what I got, in a series which has at least one major musical production number a week, was the musical episode. Because the girls are concentrating on their test so much, they kind of get stuck in singing mode. They sing everything. It’s actually funny too.

So, yeah, an episode meant for fear and trepidation ended up stripping the angst away in a couple of minutes and concentrating on musical comedy. Mind. Blown.

Meanwhile… Episode 2 of Bookworm drops tonight. Can’t wait.

Also, Death’s Handmaiden 6 is going fairly well, but some scheduling may delay it coming out. If so, then you may get it and another book in short order. Other book might be about a succubus teaching magic. Depends whether the plot works out.

Oh, and Happy Easter.

Destiny: A Magical Girl Isekai

I’ve been playing Destiny (and Destiny 2), the computer game, since the open beta on XBox. I was looking for a new game to play and, amazingly, I found a first-person shooter I actually liked. Anyway, after many years, I decided to drop it because I was getting consistently disappointed by the content. No more, Bungie! No more money are you getting from- And then they brought out The Witch Queen expansion, everyone said it was the best campaign they’ve ever done, and I caved. I have to say, I’m not finished with the campaign yet, but I think calling it their best is… bollocks.

Anyway, I was massacring something or other (it’s usually fairly difficult to differentiate between mobs who die in one hit) when a thought hit me: Destiny is a Magical Girl Isekai.

The backstory of your character in Destiny is that there’s this thing called the Traveller who grants magic powers to various champions. The champions are selected from dead people found by a technomagic fairy called a ghost. The ghost literally reincarnates your character (the ability to bring you back from the dead is, of course, an explanation for you never dying permanently in game) into a post-apocalyptic world to fight ‘the darkness.’ You have magic, elemental powers. You are a reincarnated magical girl! Plus, in keeping with modern magical girl anime, it may be that the Traveller isn’t as nice as is originally thought, and the darkness isn’t as demonic as it seems. By this point in the Destiny 2 storyline, the lines are getting pretty muddy. See? Magical Girl Isekai!

Now I just have to imagine Zavala in a frilly costume waving a wand. That should cut the stuck-up bozo down to size…

For those unaware, this is Zavala. Voiced by from The Wire.

Too Much of a Good thing?

The winter anime season was, for me, something of a mixed bag. There have been standout successes, disappointments, and pleasant surprises. When it came down to it, however, there were two days in the week when I had nothing to watch after dinner. That’s not a great collection.

Spring, however…

Crunchyroll have just announced their spring line-up (link on the image above) and it is packed. I sort of knew this was coming to some extent, but seeing it all (well, not quite all) on one web page makes me wonder when I’ll have time to sleep!

Now, Crunchyroll swallowed Funimation at the start of March in a move which probably surprised no one, so there is only one major streaming service for all these new shows to appear on. Even if Funimation was there to soak up half of the offerings, this would look like a massive list of shows, many of which are must-sees (for me anyway). And there are sixteen shows yet to be announced, so it my schedule may get more packed. Let’s see:

Ascendance of a Bookworm, Season 2: I adored the first season of this and can’t wait to see more. This is a must-watch for me.Date a Live IV: Very popular, though I’ve never watched any of them and probably won’t start now.Estab Life: Great Escape: Being heavily pushed. Will start watching.Kaguya-sama: Love is War -Ultra Romantic-: Have to admit that I’ve never got into this but a lot of people have. It should be my kind of thing, so maybe I’ll binge the first two seasons and hit this up when it starts.Love After World Domination: Hero (like, colour-coded, spandex-suit-wearing, Power Ranger-style hero) and villainess fall in love. Could be good. Will start watching, though the trailer suggested I’ll find it less fun than the (very vaguely) similar Miss Kuroitsu from the Monster Development Department which was one of my surprise hits over winter.Science Fell in Love, So I Tried to Prove it r=1-sin0: (Where 0 is theta, I think.) Again, tried to get into this and failed, but it’s popular and funny. May give it another go.Skeleton Knight in Another World: I read the first book in this series and, to be honest, wasn’t that impressed. The anime, however, could be good, and I’ll likely be watching this through the season.Spy x Family: Being heavily pushed as a big hitter for spring and seems likely to be a good one from what I’ve seen.The Greatest Demon Lord is Reborn as a Typical Nobody: So, that title’s a lie. He’s going to be OP and we all know it. This isn’t going to be as good as The Misfit of Demon King Academy, but I’ll likely be watching it through and I hope it’ll be worth it.The Rising of the Shield Hero, Season 2: Another returning big hit. Took me a couple of tries to find this at all entertaining, but I’m looking forward to this season being less depressing than the last one.Trapped in a Dating Sim: The World of Otome is Tough for Mobs: Might be worth it. This gets a few episodes to see whether it is.And I skipped a few I might give an evening of two to.And there are sixteen slots yet to be revealed.

Essentially then, it’s a good thing I generally do most of my writing during the day, because if I was hoping to get a lot done in the evening, it’s not happening. On the plus side (on the plus side of having more entertainment), Ascendance of a Bookworm inspired The Empress’ Mage. A new season might get me to write that sequel I’ve been planning. Not promising anything, however.

Power Level 9000!

Okay, so the Dragonball reference I referred to in my last post was:

‘Uh, I’m not really sure. Haven’t had it measured in a while, you know. It’s got to be over nine thousand by now.’

And here’s the scene on YouTube for those who haven’t a clue why it’s a Dragonball reference.

But, I was thinking about this over the last couple of days, and I thought, ‘What would a nine-thousand capacity get you?’ Is it really god-like? (Plus, doing a whole post to reply to myself seems silly.)

Answer: no. Well, a bit.

Believe it or not, I don’t make this stuff up. Obviously, it’s all made up, but there are rules. I know exactly how many Tammys (that’s the correct spelling) every spell takes, and so I can say with certainty which spells any of the characters can handle. And I can give you an idea of what capacity 9000 actually gets you.

Fire Blast rank 1,200. Sounds really awesome, but it’s not exactly nuclear. It works out very nicely to a blast equivalent to 5 one of TNT. That’s a bit less than half the nominal yield of the GBU-43B (aka MOAB, Mother Of All Bombs), the most powerful conventional weapon in the US arsenal (11 tons of TNT).Armageddon rank 351. This works out as rather more impressive due to the scaling factor. Rank 24 could rain lasery death down on the entire surface of the Shinden. You’d need rank 25 to cover the Earth. Rank 351 covers an area with a radius of about 5×10105 metres. That’s larger than the observable universe…Weather Control rank 96. Weather Control has different area scaling (because reasons). As such, this only gives you a 9.6 mile (15.4 km) radius; barely even a big storm.Magic Burst rank 289. That’s Nava’s current Magic Burst, not the original one. That works out about 576 lbs of TNT, but the damage dispersion from Magic Burst isn’t the same as Fire Blast, making this a little more effective as you get further from the blast centre.Armour rank 817. Sounds a lot. It’ll stop a shell from a Carl Gustaf recoilless rifle or an M72A2 LAW without trouble, and no small arms round will touch it. A Javelin anti-tank missile, however, will rip through it 99% of the time and almost certainly kill whoever it’s protecting.

For the record, the lowest complexity spell seen in the books is the Umbrella cantrip (1 Tammy; anyone able to work magic can use it). The most complex spell is hard to define since the rank concept is open-ended. Active Recovery rank 3 is 243 Tammys (and rank 5 is 438; to be featured at a later date). The ‘base’ cost of Force Dome is kind of high; Class 3, Rank 1 Force Dome is 338 Tammys, and that’s what Nava used in The Aquaria Incident. There’s a spell coming up which will take the record for highest complexity by a mile at 2,242 Tammys. That’s the flat complexity, no ranks or anything. However, if I reveal much about it, it’ll spoil things, so you’ll just have to wait and find out what needs all that oomph.

Hope this has been informative. Back to getting Nava & Co. in trouble.

And a Question…

If you haven’t read The Aquarian Incident yet. Stop reading now, and definitely don’t read the comments.

So, three posts in one night. I was not planning this. Anyway…

I was just wondering how many of you spotted the Dragonball reference. I have never watched any of the Dragonball series (and certainly never the film), which was why I figured I could get away with this one without explanation. It’s kind of surpassed anime culture. But I’d love to know how many people spotted it.

Aquarian Art Dump

Okay, the art dump for The Aquarian Incident is up on ArtStation. Link from the image above.

More than usual, this one has a lot of fanservice. Trying to decide what kind of swimsuit Mel should wear took months. I ended up not really using most of the ideas I had.