Kodilynn Calhoun's Blog, page 6

2012 Goals

Happy New Years everyone! We're doing our typical New Years Eve, celebrating the ball dropping to 2012 with virgin pina coladas (and milkshakes for the kids), but I decided to do a post for my resolutions (but…let's just call them goals, cuz in my entire 23 years on this earth, I've never been able to keep resolutions ) So. New years goals!

I've decided that 2012 is a "me" year; I'm going to try and better myself in all aspects, not just writing wise. I want to lose weight this year, I want to get more fit (because I'm pretty darn sedentary atm) and I want to start being me…because atm, I'm not who I wanna be.

So~

Writing Goals:

-Finish Spellbound. This is a project I started back in 2010 and want to have it DONE by mid-January and out to the public in March.

-Finish Hunger. I need to reconnect with this cast. I love them, but I'd burned out on first-person…and Hunger was my casualty. Nonetheless, this will be done (and aiming for a July/August release) this year!

-Finish Souljacker. This one can't be too hard, right? I have it completely mapped out/outlined. It will just be a matter of dedicating time every day to writing it out.

-Write at least two novellas. I have a couple in mind. One of them has to have zombies in it…why? Because I need to write a zombie novel

-Finish one new novel before 2013. Completely new words, whether it's a rewrite or a Brand New Shiny!

-Blog at least 2x, hopefully 3x, a week AND comment more on others' blogs. I'm horrible at blogging…and I want to get better! My goal is to get on track so I have the blog posts written (or at least figured out!) ahead of time.

My tentative plan: Monday will be for music posts, talking about bands or artists or maybe just a song I love. Wednesday will be Wednesday of Whimsy, where I'll post book reviews, funny things, or maybe just have random posts. It's whimsy, after all! And Saturday or Sunday will be for 'snippets' ie; excerpts, a few lines of my current WIP, maybe something I wrote that I'd like to share.

-Facebook and Twitter daily. I'll be the first to admit, social media intimidates me. Terribly. The idea of interacting, socially, with people terrifies me LOL. So. I'm going to aim to dedicate an hour a day to Facebook and Twitter, and hopefully by 2013 I'll be an active member of the FB/Tweeting community

Real-life "Me" Goals:

-Go gluten-free again. I'm gluten intolerant, though I don't like to admit that. I love breads, pastas, hell, anything that has wheat/rye/barley in it. AKA gluten. So… I'm going to eliminate gluten from my diet. I did it before, lost about 30 lbs. I can do it again, and stick with it. Yeah, there'll be days where I cheat (like, for Chinese? I can't give up Chinese!) but I want to always get back on the horse when I fall off.

-Cut back soda intake about 90%. I'm a horrible pop-aholic. I get fountain drinks…and not the small ones x.x So. Gonna be cutting that back, because it's unneeded calories. I don't really care for canned/bottled pops, so I should be good there. Besides the fountain drinks. Oi.

-Change the way I eat/view food. My relationship with food…well, it could be better. I need to cut back portions, use smaller plates/cups, and start understanding when exactly I'm full. This will be a toughie, but I'm determined.

-Exercise 6 days a week. Whether it be a dance game, stretching and basic floor exercises, light weight lifting, walking, swimming, etc. I want to get active and get sweating, get my heart pumping, start losing weight and firming up.

-Get down to a size 20-22. Gonna focus on inches before weight.

-Start wearing clothes/accessories that I feel are more 'me' than what I'm wearing. I'm so excited for this

So we will see how many of these goals I can do in a year! Whoot!

What are some of your 2012 goals?

Technical Difficulties and Guest Post

I'm having a little trouble with WordPress, so a few of the pages are no longer showing under certain categories? And I'm not sure why? But I'm working on figuring it out and hopefully things will be back to normal soon!

Meanwhile, why not check out my guest post/interview over at the lovely Sadie Hart's blog, where we talk about Wolfsong and you can read an excerpt of my next YA fantasy project, Spellbound. 

Have a wonderful day!

Wolfsong: Now available!

Whoo. Holidays are officially over (for me, anyways. We don't really celebrate New Years). We had an awesome Christmas, saw a bunch of family, had a couple of great dinners. Despite my holiday-anxiety (which is a reoccurring theme LOL), things went awesomely.

We got a Wii. >3 It is blue and full of amazingness. So I am a happy Kodi!

Speaking of happy: I have an announcement. After multiple edits and revisions and polishes, my debut novel, Wolfsong, is officially available for sale through Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Smashwords. I will be updating Wolfsong's page as additional distribution venues become available. Also, I hope to have it for sale in paperback by mid-January!

That said…

When his wolf-dog goes from furry to beautiful girl in 2.7 seconds, 17-year-old Kia doesn't believe it. Arii's been recruited to bring Kia home, back to her realm, where werewolves are real, the supernatural exists, and tension between the two wolf packs is threatening to erupt into a full-scale war. With his father missing, Kia is the rightful heir and without an Alpha's power behind them, their pack is defenseless in the face of an oncoming battle.

Kia has spent his entire life being a wallflower—he's not leader material, but he's not given a choice. Stolen away from all he knows, he's thrust into a world where rank is dictated by the color of your eyes and where the light of the full moon transforms you into a powerful beast. All Kia wants is to go home, where his only worry is not flunking calculus.

With the help of his new-found friends, he soon realizes that the only way to return to the real world is to end the war—but not everyone wants Kia to succeed, and as he starts to enjoy his awakening confidence as a leader and he falls deeper in love with Arii, he starts to doubt if he wants to go back at all…

~

So whoo! Much excitedness!

You can read the first chapter here.

And it's available for sale ($2.99) as an e-book here: Amazon, Amazon.co.uk, Amazon.de, Barnes & Noble, and Smashwords.

I hope everyone enjoys Wolfsong as much as I have

Now it's time to open up Spellbound and work on finishing it. Back into Word I go!

A Little Christmas Spirit

Wow. 6 days and counting 'til Christmas? Really? Jeez, last time I checked it was the first LOL.Time flies when you're having fun editing a novel!

-climbs into Santa's lap- Okay, big guy. I reallllly want a Wii… I miss playing Metroid Prime…and uh, well. There's a new Zelda game out? And you know I love Zelda. So…  -puppydogeyes-

Anyway! I want to help spread the Christmas cheer! Just in time for Christmas, anyone who wants to give my YA holiday novella, Christmas Angel, a try, can read it for FREE on Wattpad. It's also available in multiple formats at Smashwords and for the Kindle on Amazon for .99 cents (and I'm working on getting it up at BN, but PubIt is giving me some trouble. SO. Soon I hope!) for those who want to purchase a copy of their own. And if you loved it, I'd love if you'd review it

—

Ever since his girlfriend died in a car accident on Christmas Eve, 19-year-old Cheshire Morgan has been…well…a Grinch. With a dislike for Christmas and his rent two months late, his only option is to take a job playing Santa for a bunch of whiny kids. Then he meets Savannah. She tells him that his girlfriend's spirit can't move on to Heaven until Cheshire stops clinging to the past. He doesn't believe her, but she's annoyingly persistent. She makes him a deal–spend the holidays with her, let her try and teach him how to love Christmas again. If she fails, he'll never have to deal with her again. But can the spunky girl crack the ice around Cheshire's heart in time for Christmas?

And an excerpt from the novella, one of my favorite parts Enjoy! 

She passed his apartment, making him turn around in his seat. "Where are we going?"

"My place. Don't think you get off the hook with a little shopping! There's a reason I bought you this coat."

"Then take it back, please," he groaned.

Her place was a little ranch just outside of town with tan siding and gold shutters. There were several big, square bushes out front. The gravel crunched under the Toyota's tires as they pulled in. "Home sweet home," Savannah smiled, then got out and patted the hood of her rust bucket. "Today, you get Lesson One: How to Decorate a House for the Holidays."

Alright. Decorating he could handle. He used to be pretty good at it. He and Rae had had a crap-ton of lights and decorations and they were always the brightest and busiest houses on the block.

"Be right back," sing-songed the girl as she darted inside, leaving Chesh in the garage surrounded by boxes filled to the brim with decorations. Damn. Her dad must've been loaded. He scooted the box over to the patchy couch sitting on the left and sat down. He began to pull out and untangle yards of blue icicle lights, his fingers working the knots loose. He didn't even realize Savannah had come back out until he heard a crackle of static, then a pop version of "Santa Clause is Coming to Town". The music filled the garage and Savannah plopped down next to him on the couch.

"Do we have to listen to this?" Cheshire asked. "I'm not a big fan."

"You're a big Scrooge," Savannah said, pulling the lights from his grasp and plugging them into the wall behind them. She began to replace the bulbs that were burnt out, humming along to the radio and Cheshire knew he had to suck it up and deal. Together, with just the music playing between them and Savvy's off-key singing that burned Cheshire's ears, they got several strands of lights tested.

Savannah hopped to her feet, carrying a bundle, and headed outside. Chesh spotted a ladder in the corner of the garage and hauled it out after her. He held the ladder for her as she climbed up and used little plastic hooks to hang the lights on the house. "How's it look?"

"Good so far. Keep going."

They lapsed back into silence. He watched her carefully as she hooked the hooks on the gutter, one by one, and if he let his eyes lose focus just a little, he could pretend that she was Rae. Then Savannah turned towards him, breaking the illusion, and he frowned and softly murmured, "Rae loved hanging lights."

"She always used to come over and help me with my place after Dad died. I was kinda lost the first Christmas after she…passed."

So was I, he wanted to say. So much so that he hadn't bothered to decorate anything since.

"Just think," she continued, "Next year, you'll decorate your place and remember this wonderful time we're spending together!"

He meant to snort at her—really he did—but it came out as a laugh instead. She looked startled by this, nearly falling off the ladder, which made him laugh harder. God, he was going off the deep end… "Get down," he managed to wheeze out and she hopped to the ground, giggling at him.

"This is good, Chesh," she said brightly. "You're healing through laughter!"

After he regained his composure, they finished lighting the house and then did the bushes. Savannah hung a wreath on the front door and they sprayed "snow" on the garage door in a snowflake pattern (though Cheshire thought they looked more like retarded stars). Snow began to fall about halfway through and Savannah danced around in it like a crazy person, dark hair trailing behind her. He merely watched her as she flopped down on the ground and began to make a snow angel, waving her arms and legs for him to join her, but he shook his head and settled for observing instead. She really was pretty—a different kind of pretty than Rae'd been; more delicate, fine-boned and angelic, even though she herself was a demon-child from Hell with what she was putting him through. He thought back to Wal-Mart, to the lingerie, and groaned. And this was just the beginning. He had to endure an entire month with this girl.

"Wake up, Chesh," Savannah said, suddenly next to him, her face bright pink and her hair covered in snowflakes. He blinked, pulled out of his thoughts, and she tugged on his arm. "Let's make hot cocoa. I have the best Swiss Mocha recipe and you're just lucky enough to help me make it!" She bounded off like a hyperactive Golden retriever and he groaned.

Doomed.

—

Happy reading, and happy holidays

Early Inspirations

I grew up in the middle grade/YA section of the library. I was am kind of a hermit, and to top it all off, I was homeschooled. What else was there to do but read?

But back when I was 12-15 years old, the books that I wanted to read? Fantasy, and not the sword-and-sorcery stuff, wasn't popular. Or if it was, our library didn't get it in. Harry Potter was the first big contemporary fantasy our small-town library got in, and with HP came the trends of 'good' fantasy. I was like, yes, finally! I got hooked on stuff like Artemis Fowl (still a huge fan of Eoin Colfer's writing style as an adult!). But what got me truly loving fantasy enough to write it?

Amelia Atwater-Rhodes. Our library had one of her books, Hawksong. I found it while browsing the shelves and liked the title. I devoured it in a sitting, and then passed it off to my mom. We became fans; Mom ended up eBaying her previous book, and we waited with bated breath for the rest of her Kiesha'ra series to come out. We bought them hardcover, which we never do But that's beside the point.

Her novel inspired me: shape-shifters. I'd never heard of such a thing before Hawksong. What if I could do my own version of shifters…with my lifelong love of wolves? (Werewolves weren't hot yet; that love came from Blood & Chocolate, as well as one of my CP's original novels )

Thus, the idea for Wolfsong spawned. I wrote it in three months in 2005, in a mess of disarray and chunks of novel here and there. I skipped the middle to write the end. It's come a long way from the original draft and I can't wait to share my love of Wolfsong with the world

Here I Go

It's not often that my siblings and I have the same taste in music, but every time they had their Pandora stations playing loudly, I'd hear a couple of songs and every time, I was like, "Hey, who's this. I like them."

They'd reply: "Relient K." (And then promptly roll their eyes, like I should know this.)

So I started listening to them. And…well. They're my favorite band at the moment, between their punk-pop-acoustic sound, the sexy vocals, and the meanings behind the lyrics.

I heard this song…and it's so…me. The lyrics strike a chord (no pun intended ) deep within me and I just keep listening to it on repeat on my ancient MP3 player.

For me, it signifies the fact that I am ready. Ready to release my debut novel, despite the setbacks, despite the preaching I had growing up that I'd never make it, that it was just a pipe-dream. Oh, and my personal favorite: "Don't put all your eggs in one basket." Sorry, Dad, but the basket's full. I don't plan to ever stop writing. No more sitting around, waiting for something to happen. Time to make this dream a reality.

So yes. I love this song

Writing Woes…

Argh. I'm having issues, man. I'm not happy with my WIP, Souljacker. I loved the idea. I loved it as I wrote 11k in 7 days. Lucy is wounded and snarky, but cute. Her voice is sharp and witty. I liked it even, for the first 20k. Then it started dragging its feet. I skipped a few days of writing, just avoiding it. I'm now at 35k and each word is like pulling teeth. With rusty pliers. And no laughing gas, even.

I know myself well; I do this pretty much every WIP. Some of them I give up on, are just halted indefinitely at 35k. Some of them I powered through and finished. I just need a moment to say…

Brain: AHLKFHLDSHKASD THE PAINNN! Why do you make me do this?! I hate it, I hate it, nonononononononooo! -flails like a 4-year-old throwing a tantrum because Mommy won't let her get a Barbie doll-

-cough- Now that that's over with. I know my solution. I've always known my solution. I need to push through it. I need to sit down, figure out where the heck I'm going with it. Outline the rest of the novel, scene-by-scene with Sticky Notes; transfer it over to a Word document. Write 1k or 1 scene a day, even if it sucks major eggs, deleting the Sticky Notes with each scene I check off. By Jan 1st (my goal-date, giving me 35 days at 1k a day = 35k = 70k (which is my usual length) I'll have a finished book ready to go out for edits. By spring, I'll have a shiny new story ready to share with the world, which I will more than likely love and forget all about the pain.

If I know this, why am I resisting (and complaining ) so much?

-off to wallpaper her screen with Sticky Notes-

Are You Who You Wanna Be?

While browsing through my music, I found an old CD in a drawer, Switchfoot's The Beautiful Letdown. And I of course had to listen to it. And this song really got me. Made me start thinking, wondering, dreaming. Am I who I wanna be? Right now, today? If nothing else mattered? Am I being me?

The long and short of it? No. I'm not. I know who I want to be, but to actually be there? It's something I'm working on.

I've always been the kind of girl to be ashamed of what I like, even if it's something I love. I think this is stemmed from the fact that I grew up in a very judgmental household. I've loved music since I was little, but my dad judged it. Hated it. Mocked it. Made me feel bad I was even listening to it to the point where I hid what I listened to. I only listened at night, played low or through headphones. I quit singing out loud because he would tell me to 'not quit my day job'. So I'm especially sensitive.

Same with TV shows; as a kid, I was a hardcore Dragon Ball Z/Sailor Moon fan. I watched them religiously…until people started judging me. I didn't take into consideration that there were other people out there, more fanatic than me. All I saw was the haters. I remember one time, around 10 or so, my friend and I were at Wal-Mart and she was excited to show me a couple of new DBZ toys. She pretty much had to drag me down the 'boy' aisle…and even when I wanted those toys, I played 'cool' and pretended it was stupid…why? Just in case someone judged me walking down the aisle. Why did those strangers MATTER to me?

But it's something I've always done. I'm afraid of judgement. And you know what? I'm tired of judgement… What does it matter if someone thinks I'm a loser, if I've never met that guy in my entire life nor will I ever see him again? Yeah, it's a lot diff when your siblings or parents or friends mock you, but usually then it's in jest, not a serious "Dude you're lame, get a life" sort of thing.

As a plus-sized girl, I've always felt like I should wear what's expected of me, even if it's Not Me. I'm a hater of stretch pants, but that's what I wear, because they're comfortable. But I hate them. My friend helps pick out my clothes, because if they look good on her, they'll look good on me. And I love her for that–but our tastes are wildly different. She likes classier, frillier things.

Me? I've got a taste for the more punkish, layered stuff. I like jeans and studded belts and rainbow fingerless gloves. I like Day-glo orange nail polish and bright eyeshadows and heavy eyeliners. If I had the money to get it professionally done, my hair would be a different color every three months. I'm planning on buying teal Fishbowl dye for Christmas just because. I like the stuff that Hot Topic sells. Why? Idk. I just think it's cute and it's me. More me than I've been in a long time. Are people gonna judge? Hell yeah–they judge my little sister, call her emo because she likes wearing black. She's not emo. She just likes the style. It's who she wants to be. There will always be haters.

The only downside of that is, in our town? Cute clothes are for the people in size 6s and A-cups. Even if I hit my goal weight, a size 6, on me, would be skeletal. I could do a comfortable 12/14. But that's not the point. The point is, I need to find a place that sells what I deem cute clothes, in bigger sizes. They have to be out there. So I'm on the search.

And yeah, clothes don't make the person. But I'm learning to love the girl I am inside, the girl who bursts into Christmas songs, interchanging words with naughty ones, in the middle of July. I'm the girl who says random things just out of spontanety, laughs too much on a lame joke she's heard three times already. I love to laugh, and I love to have fun… And if people mock me? I'm learning to get over it and stop being so sensitive. They mean nothing to me.

Are you who YOU wanna be? Why or why not?

And do you know of any awesome clothing lines that are cute AND plus-sized?

Farewell, Friend

As of today, our inside/outside cat, Thomas, has been missing for two weeks. He's never been gone this long in the entire four years he's been with us. I've had a post up on Craigslist, an ad/watch up at the shelter since the third day. What hope I had has diminished; I don't think he's coming back. I just hope that if he died, he didn't linger, and that if he found a new home, he's happy where he is. I just wish we could've had a goodbye. Closure, or something.

Thomas O'Malley came to us Thanksgiving of 2007, a big, Maine Coon-looking cat of maybe two years, starving. He had scabs all over from malnourishment. He had no claws, front or back, and he was neutered. We think someone either moved or dumped him in our addition. All we know is that he was a very sick and hungry boy. Mom started feeding him immediately and he bonded to her like glue, giving purrs and kisses. After it started snowing, we brought him inside, where he spent the winter, but he was never truly happy with house-cat life. By spring, he wanted back out. He became our garage cat, sleeping in at night and spending his days outdoors. Being outside was his choice.

Soon, the cat with no claws was bringing us moles, mice, chipmunks, and rabbits, some still alive. Mom would act put out, but she secretly loved that he brought her 'gifts'. We encouraged him.

He started befriending neighbors–people would always stop to pet him on walks, they'd slow down so he could cross the street. Kids loved him. He had food bowls at different houses, but he always came home. He never stayed gone for more than three days. He was always back at the door with his girly little meow, lol.

It wasn't until this year that Tom and I really saw eye to eye. He didn't…well, agree with my affinity for hugging/glomping cats (not that any of my cats particularly agree to that! xP) But these last few months, we started bonding. He'd sit in my lap. I'd scratch, he'd purr. I got attached. I wasted four years not loving that cat to his potential. I took it harder than Mom when he disappeared. I cried for days, even longer than I mourned when my beloved Evee was put down this fall. I held onto hope that he'd come back, I really did. I put up ads, looked at the shelter. I even looked for a body around the neighborhood.

Thomas O'Malley just disappeared…

I miss him. If he's still alive, I hope he's well. I hope he's warm and loved. And if he's gone, I hope he didn't suffer. I still have the tiniest sliver of hope that, by spring, he'll show up…but it's tiny.

I love and miss you, Tommy. We all do.