Hart Johnson's Blog, page 31

A Geekisborg, Just for You...

Shun-SHENG duh gao-WAHN! It has been WAY to long since I just indulged you in a good old time, so I have a few treats for you. Most of these came to me through Facebook shares. There are some perks to having a reputation as a nut. People share vast silliness with me all the time. First... your tutorial on what the above phrase...





Fifteen Best Firefly Chinese Phrases: 



Any of you who have not yet watched Firefly really should get on that. It's fabulous. And until then, Holy Testicle Tuesday to you!!!









ALSO in the meantime... Let's revive some old phrases, shall we?



20's Phrases that need Reviving :











And HEY Game of Thrones Geeks!!!



The Season 4 Trailer is OUT !!!:



And when My buddy Joshua shared the above, Matthew McNish shared the first Complete History and Lore For Game of Throne s:



There are two of these, more than an hour a piece, but an EXCELLENT education for those of you who haven't read, and reminder for those of us who have.





And HEY, because I can be useful too... this video could save a life (watch to the end for specifics) but it's delivered beautiful:





So there!

Jade Jamison and Fully Automatic!!!

Jade is one of my writing buddies and seriously awesome, super reliable beta partners and her latest book, Fully Automatic is COMING!  She writes erotic fiction, which I know isn't for all of you, but some of you love this stuff and I think some of you who have been afraid to try might find Jade's style of it more appealing... her common theme in her Bullet series is Rock Stars, and who DOESN'T want to dive into something hot with a rock star, eh? And more than that, her characters are fully developed, three dimensional, and face some true-to-life demons that I find missing in some romance, let alone erotic fiction.  So here is the scoop!


















You might think you know Brad’s story, but think again. There’s so much more to his story than what Valerie told. See Brad before Valerie came into his life and, when he was playing back burner to Ethan, see what Brad was up to when no one else in the band was looking.

Valerie might have thought she and Brad were inevitable and maybe, in the back of his mind, Brad might have felt that way too, but he didn’t just sit around waiting for her. See the secret side of Brad that you had no idea existed. What kept the driving force behind Fully Automatic focused even while his heart was breaking?



When Brad caught Nick outside the apartment after work, he asked him to take a walk. “How you feeling?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, the past few weeks have been pretty emotional. You holding up okay, man?”

“Yeah.” Nick shrugged. He was quiet for a little bit but then said, “Things have been a little weird, though.”

“Yeah.” He cleared his throat. “I was thinking about calling a meeting.”

“You think that would help?”

Brad took a deep breath. “Honestly? I have no fucking idea. But…I hate the idea of waiting for the next time, you know? I’d like a promise from Ethan that we’re done with this phase of our lives.”

“You don’t really think he’d make a promise like that, do you?”

“No. Wishful thinking.”

They walked in silence for a minute and then Nick said, “You know what’s going on with Val and Ethan, right?”

A ringing started in his ears, and he felt dread as a shiver tickled his spine. He knew he wasn’t going to like what Nick had to say, but he needed to know. “What?”

Nick stopped walking and Brad turned to face him. “I’m only telling you this because it’s only fair to you. I’m not sure what all is or was going on between you and Val, but I don’t want—anyway, uh…Ethan proposed to Val.”

It felt like the air had been knocked out of his lungs. When he got his bearings, he sucked in a deep breath of air. Had he heard Nick right? “What?”

“Ethan asked Val to marry him. I, uh…don’t know if it’s totally official yet, but…”

Brad couldn’t hear him after that, and it felt as though the world turned black. He already knew. If Ethan proposed, he knew Val accepted. He felt numb.

Somehow he had the presence of mind to say, “Don’t say anything about me and Val to Ethan. That shit’s over.”

“Yeah. No way. It’s not like she was cheating on him.”

Brad felt like he was going to throw up. He grew quiet, walking back to the apartment with Nick, but his mind was trying to find a way to deal with the worst news it had ever received.



















GOODREADS / FACEBOOK / WEBSITE



Jade C. Jamison was born and raised in Colorado, moved from one city/town to the next, and she’s decided she likes it so much she wants to stay…although travel is not out of the question. She lives in a big town in Colorado (not unlike Winchester!) with her husband and four children. She is working on becoming a crazy cat lady. Okay, so maybe not.

Still want more? Jade has a bachelor’s degree in English Literature and Theater, a master’s degree in English, and a master of fine arts in Creative Writing. Obviously, she loves school and the student loan folks love her. She works in human services by day, teaches English and creative writing at night, and—in between playing soccer mom and community leader—writes like a fiend. Someday soon, she’ll narrow it down to just writing, but let’s get all those kids off to college first.







AMAZON / BARNES & NOBLE / SMASHWORDS





AMAZON / BARNES & NOBLE / SMASHWORDS / KOBO





AMAZON / BARNES & NOBLE / SMASHWORDS / KOBO


Hosted by:

Insecure Writer's Post

IS COMING... Time seems to be dumping on me, so mid-day--you are not forgotten,





Or not... my day totally got away from me... had to WORK the entire work day!!! Not even a real lunch break. So I am insecure about not being able to manage it all!!!



Seriously.



I have heard from my agent... she likes the premise and location for What Ales Me, but a ton of work to do...



I STILL need to write books 10, 11 & 12 for my serial (that is about 300 pages)...



And I have an ABNA novel to polish!!! (going to submit Medium Wrong again--with some editing, but I never even passed pitch round with it last year, so I'd like some actual feedback on it)... or maybe I should get back to the already seriously revised Kahlotus Disposal Site... Not sure... feeling insecure about BOTH these days and that's no good...

Three Things

1)  Nothing else I post this week will be as cool as hosting Harry Dolan yesterday, so you should go read THAT.



2)  The New Normal has released!!!



3)  Laurel Garver is hosting me today at Laurel's Leaves.

Interview with Harry Dolan for The Last Dead Girl

I WIN!!!



And by I win, I mean Harry Dolan agreed to do an interview with me for the release of The Last Dead Girl, his third book, which releases Thursday!!! Both Harry's other books have been best sellers (deservingly so) and you know what? This is my favorite of the three!!! It's really fantastic! I am working up a better review, but FOR NOW, I am just going to let you watch me talk to the Fabulous Harry Dolan--hows's THAT!?







1)  This book is a prequel, rather than a sequel (earlier even, than David changing his name). What made you decide to head into David's past instead of going forward?



The idea for this book evolved over time. It began with the story of the victim, Jana Fletcher, an idealistic young law student who’s involved in an Innocence Project—she’s working to exonerate someone she believes has been imprisoned for a murder he didn’t commit. And her involvement in this project leads to her death. Originally, I intended to set the story in Ann Arbor, and Jana was going to be an intern at Gray Streets magazine; I thought that would be how David would get drawn into the story. I tried to work out the plot along those lines, and it wasn’t working. I wanted to introduce another character, a fellow student who would be Jana’s lover and would be driven to uncover the truth about her death. But then there were too many characters and things got too complicated. And I realized that if I set the story in David’s past, then he could be the one who was romantically involved with Jana. And then everything became much simpler.





2)  This book showed a David who was more candid than he is in later books—he is more open with the reader about his thoughts and emotions. Was that a conscious decision? And if so, what was your decision process there? (It made sense to me, but I want to see if I am following your thinking or making stuff up.)



I think you’re right that he’s more open in this book, but that wasn’t a conscious decision on my part. It probably has to do with the nature of the story. In my first novel, Bad Things Happen, part of the mystery revolved around David’s identity: What sort of person was he? Where did he come from? So in that book I didn’t always reveal what he was thinking and feeling. And the book was written entirely in the third person, which lends itself to the keeping of secrets. The Last Dead Girl, on the other hand, is mostly written in the first person, and David is much more emotionally invested in the victim than he has been in my previous novels. So that’s probably why I wound up revealing more of his thoughts and emotions, even though that’s not something I deliberately set out to do.





3)  And as a follow up—do you plan to give readers a bit more about how David changes to become a much more cautious man that he is in your earlier books? And if it ISN'T going to be in the books, could you maybe share what you see as the impetus for the change?



I think the change is probably a natural result of age and experience. In The Last Dead Girl, David is twenty-six years old; in Bad Things Happen and Very Bad Men, he’s in his late thirties. If David is more cautious and more guarded in the chronologically later books (and I think he is), it’s because he’s learned to be that way. You could think of The Last Dead Girl as the story of the first really bad thing that happened to David: his first serious encounter with violence and loss and grief. And I think that definitely shaped his character.





4)  You are also in a new (old?) location. Rome, New York. I know you did your education in rural New York. Is this the city? Is this a place you know as well as Ann Arbor? And did you go to visit, or did you rely on memory? Any challenges to writing about a location that isn't your current home town (compared to the two books set in the one that is)?



I grew up in Rome, New York, and I still have family there, so I visit at least once a year. It’s a small city located in the central part of the state. It used to be the home of an Air Force base, but the base shut down in the 1990s and the population has declined since then. The version of Rome in the novel is slightly fictionalized: it’s a bit bigger and more prosperous. And the real Rome doesn’t have a university with a law school, so I invented one for the sake of the story. But apart from that, I use a lot of real street names and locations. Much of the action is set on the back roads on the western edge of the city, not far from where I grew up. We lived in a house on a rural highway, near an old section of the Erie Canal. I used to go for walks alongside the canal, so I couldn’t resist setting a scene there. It’s a perfect place for a murder: isolated, remote, and if you need to dispose of a body, the water’s right there.





5)  You have a couple really rotten people and a couple murders (including some overlap, obviously), but I felt like you did a really fantastic job in making us 'get them'. I didn't always sympathize, but I could at least understand how THEY saw it. Did you use any tricks or rules or make a plan to ensuring your antagonistic characters were three dimensional and that their actions had a certain historic sense?



Villains are always tricky to write, because you want them to come across as real people, not just as devices to move the plot along. I try to keep that in mind. As I’ve mentioned, most of the scenes in The Last Dead Girl are written in the first person, but there are also scenes scattered throughout in the third person—scenes that reveal the thoughts and actions of the main villain in the book, whose identity is disguised until the end. (I refer to him only as “K.”) I’ve used this first-person/third-person structure in my last two books, and I find it’s useful for revealing the killer’s motives. In this book there are several scenes near the beginning that pair K with a young woman named Jolene. Jolene is just someone who stumbles across K as he’s staking out one of his intended victims, but I found that K seemed to come alive when he encountered her. They’re together only briefly but they have an interesting rapport, and I think that goes a long way toward humanizing him.





6)  I'm wondering if there are any details in this book that come from a real life experience worthy of a story. What brings up the question is the incredible detail and quirk to the landlady, Mrs. Lanik—the food, the drink, the sour temperament but brief shots of kindness. She just seemed like someone you may have known or at least drawn from someone. If not, though, any other people or events inspired from real experiences will do...



Sometimes you get lucky and a character shows up fully formed. Agnes Lanik was one of those. She’s a woman in her seventies, Jana’s landlady who lives right next door. She’s originally from Czechoslovakia, so she speaks with an accent and cooks food from the old country and drinks Becherovka, a bitter liqueur which is supposed to taste like a cross between cinnamon and mouthwash. She’s not really modeled after any real person, though some of the food she cooks is based on personal experience. I’m thinking especially of holubky, which are cabbage rolls stuffed with ground beef and rice and covered with tomato sauce. I had an aunt who used to make those—though she was Polish and called them galumpkis.







7)  And finally, what are you working on now? Same MC? If so, early, or later? Maybe give us just a little teaser!



I’m working on a new book now, and all I can tell you is that it’s a stand-alone novel with a new main character. It’s liberating to step away from David Loogan temporarily—and also a bit scary. But I fully expect to come back to him in the future, and to catch up with Elizabeth Waishkey and her daughter Sarah as well.





Thank you so much, Harry! You've been fantastic! And for anyone even a little local to Ann Arbor, Harry is doing a reading/signing at Nicola's on West Stadium Thursday night! If you have a chance to be there, you won't be sorry! (and you'll see ME, besides!)

Ouroboros

As the year eats its own tail and begins again, it is time for that annual reflection on “Did I Managed last years' goals?” and “What the heck is the plan for this year?”





I've been known to do a string of these, draw out my goals with piles of specificity, and I believe that helps, but somehow with my two weeks off, I've managed to fill the with crazy 'didn't get done yet' stuff that needed doing. So I will be a bit briefer than in past years.



[I heard that sigh of relief]





Fitness



Last year's goal: Lose about 80 pounds...

Last year's result: Lost 54 pounds, but in the last three months have gained about half back.

Conclusion: I did pretty good, then not so good, but at least this year I only have 50 to lose.



The How for 2014: Weight Watchers, Walking... Pretty much exactly the same as I did it LAST YEAR but without changing jobs and publishing a serial (both of which have made things super hard since July). I find the new year is a good time to just get my nose back to it. If you want the REAL specifics, just see LAST YEAR'S PLAN.



Also... I now have a carpet in my basement and a yoga mat, so I have a more feasible plan for getting some core stuff into my routine.



Balance



Last Year's Goal was about Family stuff, and there we had a pretty good year. I am very proud to say as of Friday, HWMNBMOTI has had a year of sobriety. This has meant some changes at home, 98% of them good. My daughter successfully graduated high school and completed her first semester at community college. There was a juvenile delinquency misstep with Thing 2 and some graffiti, but it is over and there are no lasting repercussions. I've come to accept that my children are just never going to do things the easy way. It is the price of marrying the hot bad boy... tell your daughters.



My 2014 balance goals are a little more loosey goosey. I am trying to get each of my family members to commit to a TV show with me—I know it sounds pathetic, but none of them want to walk with me and the other things my kids would want to do with me all cost money, so we are starting with this.



And READING... I haven't done a specific reading goal before—I sort of fit in what I can between editing and beta reading. But I found one that looks like the PERFECT size, hosted by Lori at Escape with Dollycas. It is to read through the alphabet, which is just one book every two weeks. You DON'T have to go in order. I think it will help me push myself just a little and be a good excuse to work in some of those 'classics' we are all supposed to have read that I haven't managed yet... and it will give me a way to pick WHICH of all of your great books I plan to get to next (because if I don't PICK I end up doing something silly like rereading because I am overwhelmed... this is a way to whelm me... or something)





And then the Writing Plan:



GREEN: 2013 goal MET

RED: 2013 goal NOT MET

PURPLE: 2013 goal MIXED

BLUE: 2014 goat SET



Medium Wrong DID get polished and into ABNA, but didn't pass the pitch stage... I have notes for another revision so I think it will also be THIS year's ABNA (but hopefully with a passable pitch)



What Ales Me: DID have it's revisions and is currently with Ellen (and out of my hands) SUCCESS in terms of what I could control. 2014 plan is to leave it in Ellen's capable hands unless and until she tells me otherwise.



Kahlotus Disposal Site: I sort of petered out on this. After Amy didn't have luck submitting and admitted she'd fallen out of love with it, I decided I needed a little time to think about it and haven't worked back up to it yet. My 2014 goal with it is really to decide where it fits in with my other stuff, as there is a YA PLAN *BUWAHAHAHAHAHA*





Begonia Bribe was successfully released and work prepping Keeping Mum is done. 2014, March 4, I release Keeping Mum (so need to do a marketing campaign).



Wrote Also Appearing for BuNoWriMo and unexpectedly wrote much of a teen armageddon one (Endangered) for what I dibbed March Madness. The FORMER is part of my 2014 YA plan, the LATTER I will release serially, but not until 2015.



And from there the rest of the 2013 plan went to heck because I INSTEAD decided to serially release Shot in the Light, which has been an INSANE adventure—tons of writing, editing, learning... It hasn't been a financial success, and it isn't DONE yet... I've released 5 of 12... it fits better at this point with my 2014 plan than my 2013 review, so lets change gears.





Shot In the Light: Episodes 6 and 7 to release in January, 8 in February, 9 in March, 10 and 11 in April and 12 in May... I am ALSO releasing them in paperback (bundled 4 at a time). 10-12 still need to be written, though there is a path for each character—closer to an outline than I normally do.



That, and the release of Keeping Mum, are big enough jobs that the only OTHER thing I plan to do in 1st quarter is this ABNA prep.



2nd Quarter: Finish Shot release until DONE. Revision of Also Appearing (see plan below), and Writing 2nd Artful Ales Book (BuNoWriMo)--It is my deep hope Ellen will be able to sell the Artful Ales series... I should KNOW by the end of 2nd quarter, but even if I don't KNOW, I am going to release them one way or another, and there will need to be at least 3, so I might as well keep writing.



3rd Quarter: I want to get my YA house in order. Kahlotus Disposal Site and Medium Wrong are both stand-alones that may just have to wait to see how the plan goes. Because I have decided Also Appearing will be the first in a series of 'place' YA books, each independent, but all connected to Lake Chatcolet,w here I spent much of my childhood... it is lake furthest south of one BIG lake that is actually Coeur d'Alene, Idaho, a place with tiny towns, an Indian Reservation, rustic summer cabins... and serious potential. I looked through my book ideas and at least 4 of my 'good ideas' in addition to Also Appearing, could ALSO be set there (or around there) and I think that strong, familiar set of place makes for stronger books. There are a lot of issues that can be hit—some spooky, some serious (there is an Aryan Nation headquarters to the north, so teens thinking about issues of race, there is an area known for 'Devil Worshippers' so good ghost story fodder... and then there is normal teen drama...) I'm excited, know which book will be next—for NaNoWriMo maybe (Summer Bones).



Some of you may not agree with me, and that's fine, but I still happen to think YA can be a lot bigger with a publishing house behind me, and I KNOW how much work self publishing is now. So I am at least going to attempt to make this plan go traditionally. I may change my mind. Querying is at least as painful as sorting all the publishing details. But at least with querying, you reach a time you can let somebody ELSE take over all those details. I will try Amy again, first—I loved working with her and think it was the BOOK that was the trouble, not the two of US. And if I end up with an agent to help with ALL my YA stuff, maybe she can also help sort what PLAN makes most sense (though I do think this series all set in the same place is the right idea).



What about all of you? Do you have a PLAN!? *BUWAHAHAHAHAHA*

In Which Time Fails to Materialize

Wibbly Wobbly, it may be, but somehow the stuff fails to show up when I really need it. I'm really not sure what I was thinking... the PLAN, as it was, was madness...



Which PLAN you ask? *BUWAHAHAHAHAHAHA*



*cough*



The one where I format the paperback and load into all the other formats in plenty of time to be available for Christmas...





Obstacles



1)  I got behind on my timing of Book 5 in the serial, so was tangled in production when I should have been writing. This has set me back across the board. I THOUGHT I would be done writing 'all 10' by now... but I am NOT done with 10 and there actually will be 12...



2)  I had a couple beta readers hit obstacles for reading book 6, so that is running a bit behind, too.



3)  Formatting the paperback is more complicated than I thought.



4)  The DAY job has remained SWAMPED. Normally I sneak a few things in on any given day because WORD (which I have at work and not home) plays more nicely with all those uploading programs (I have tried to upload books from home twice now and Kindle doesn't like my home computer. And with no time to steal at work, I haven't managed to do that other formatting, partially for this reason.







Accomplishments



1)  I DID manage to do my final cleanup of What Ales Me and sent it to Ellen.



2)  I page-proofed Keeping Mum.



3)  I edited Book 6 for 2nd readers.



4)  I DID format the paperback. It is books 1-4 of the serial and available HERE



5)  And Joris created the BEAUTEOUS full cover (front/back, spine... did you know dimension of spine changes with page number? I know that now)



6)  And I've written almost all of book 9, started book 10 and plotted a couple character strands of 11... so getting there.



7)  Got my proof copies (and ordered some promotional ones) (I will take a picture, but not probably until this weekend... I'm not sure where the camera is)





Still To Do



1)  Shop, send Christmas presents and a couple gifts... (I know. Not a writing exercise)

2)  Finish formatting for various OTHER formats (can you format for formats?).

3)  Finish 9 and 10 THIS month (plot 11 and 12)

4)  First Edit of book 8

5)  2nd edit of book 7

6)  3rd edit of book 6

7)  If POSSIBLE (which I don't think it is) Publish book 6—this will PROBABLY be early January rather than December.)



So There... It feels an awful lot like I'm making a lot of excuses these days... hopefully my TWO WEEK vacation, which begins at 4 on Friday, will give me the time I need to finish up.

A Little Christmas Love

I have not one... not two... but THREE friends with Christmas romance novellas recently released, so I wanted to share them with you today, in case you wanna fall in love this week!!!







Last Christmas by Talli Roland



You guys ALL know Talli, right? One of our longtime blog friends!  I haven't read this one, but Talli does a fabulous job with romantic comedy, so I'm sure this one will deliver, too!



Here is the blurb: For Lucy, the best Christmas present is forgetting the past.



Eager to banish the ghost of Christmas past - when her boyfriend dumped her on the streets of Paris - Lucy is determined to make this the best Christmas ever. She rallies friends and family for an epic celebration that just happens to fall on the same day as her ex's festive wedding. Furious at how she's been treated, Lucy can't help relishing the party v wedding smackdown.



But when the wedding is threatened and only Lucy can help, can she find the spirit inside to save the day, or will this Christmas be even more disastrous than the last?









Meet Me Half Way by Amber T. Smith



Amber is actually part of my writing group and I've been friends with her several years. (She is secretly Tara, who was my first reader clear back when I was writing fan fiction) Meet me halfway is a heart wrenching tale of a couple who lost their baby and in their grief have managed to become estranged. I'm about 2/3 done reading this one and it is a tear-jerker so far!



Here is the official blurb: Beth can't forgive her husband for cheating on her just after they lost their son during childbirth. Struggling to come to terms with his infidelity, Beth decides to push Mark out of her life for good, and books herself on a prolonged cruise just as the anniversary of their son's death approaches.



Mark is still devastated at Beth's complete lack of trust in him, and has given up trying to reconcile with his wife. When he learns of her cruise plans, it shakes him out of his stupor, and fills him with a renewed determination to woo her back.



With the cruise booked to depart in just a few short days, and with Christmas just around the corner, Mark has no choice but to re-open old wounds, with the hope of convincing his wife that they should never have parted.



But Beth has secrets of her own. If they are to reunite, she'll need to forgive not only her husband, but herself, too...







Starting From Scratch by Stacy Gail 



I had the fortune to be a beta reader on this one... Stacy had one of her manic sprints last spring—a story that absolutely wouldn't let her be, and I promise, if you read it, you will be able to tell why. Stacy and I have been friends and critique partners many years, and I always love Stacy's writing—she has the true emotion, well developed characters and always includes a bit of the humor that can often be absent in romances. It's a fabulous balance.



Here is the blurb: Christmas is the perfect time to start from scratch.



Lieutenant Sully Jax saved his unit during an IED attack, but he couldn't save his marriage. He can't even remember it. Recovered from his injuries, he's come home to the family and friends he knows—and an ex-wife who's a stranger to him.



Lucy Crabtree was heartbroken last Christmas when Sully announced his plan to go on one last tour of duty, and devastated when he asked for a divorce after he awoke in the hospital with no memory of her. She's finally moving on from her hurt and from losing the man she loved more than anything, and her cookie-baking business is taking off just in time for the holidays. But now Sully's back, and she can't deny she still loves him. But how can she trust her heart to someone who breaks it every time she sees him?



Sully might not remember Lucy, but something inside won't let her go. With every bite of her cookies, he finds a new love for Lucy, and he soon realizes he wants to rebuild his life…with her by his side.





So there you have it... three shortish love stories to get you in the mood for the holiday! Interesting that two of them have heroines named Lucy and themes around forgetting, but they sound very different.



You should go get them! Because who DOESN'T need a little more love at Christmas?

Publishing and Money

Second Wednesday is for Indie Author stuffs...



I ran across an article last week that was a fabulous dose of reality about which kind of authors made how much money. Not that money is the be all and end all, but it is nice to know what we are in for...



http://www.digitalbookworld.com/2013/self-publishing-debate-part3/







See here is my thing...



I have a day job. I will HAVE TO have a day job until I make enough writing to make up for NOT having said day job... because my retirement and insurance are really good, this is quite a LOT of writing income I have to make, or I really CAN'T quit... And not just once, but a good guess it will continue in the foreseeable future. That means I really need to be in that LAST, six-figure group to quit the day job. (not my income, but my income plus insurance for my family plus retirement put me very close—close enough that when I start TAXING the money that buys insurance, it would push the need over)



[now I LOVE my dayjob in a lot of ways, I'd just really prefer to do it maybe half time—the content is great, the people are great, the cause is great... but it just ISN'T writing fiction to my heart...]





So I need to keep the income in mind... do I write a little and not worry about it, or do I try to write enough to cross over and be a WRITER?



That's why I'm talking about the money.





See, the OTHER thing about the money (and time and jobs)... When I have so little writing time, I REALLY only have WRITING time... and I have some projects I'd like to commit to as an INDIE publisher... An Indie person needs to be a jack of all trades, but with a JOB, I just don't have time for that—not even to DO it, but REALLY not to LEARN IT. Does that make sense?



I didn't really get it until I started publishing my serial, which I can only do Indie, there being no formal serial mechanism annallat... but there is a LOT of time involved (and money)--covers and editing—I am paying for these, but it means thus far I've lost money. I KNOW this will be worth it—to not have a sub-par product out there, but time and money... time and money... time and money... neither of which I have.





So back to the graph... did you know I am a number nerd by day?



These are all percentages, so it gets a little hard to know what is what in real numbers... I assume there are MANY more aspiring writers than published writers, though self-publishing makes crossing that bridge a lot easier... so N for aspiring is biggest, followed by self... but I have NO CLUE how traditional and hybrid categories compare.





Comes out March 4--my 3rd Cozy

What I KNOW is I fell into the $1-$4,999 category this year... and last year... and the year before that. In 2010 I was the next category up because a three book contract with an advance meant I got a portion (40% of the advance for all three books) at signing. But in 2011 and 2012, I would have fallen in that 'traditional' $1-$4,999 category... this year I became purple... me and my $30 of Indie income *rolls eyes * Actually I've lost money on that so far, because I am paying for covers and editing, but I have hopes now that I am bundling it will get better, and once it is DONE, it will improve even more.



What gives me HOPE though, is that distribution of purple... hybids. That's me.



I sent a book that would be first in a second cozy series to my agent this week. I think it will sell. I'd frankly like to ALWAYS have a traditional series going. It gets me invited places. (is that shallow?) I think breaking out is easier with an icebreaker... and my personality just is NOT charming enough to break out otherwise. I am awkward.



And while hybrids have about 26% of us sitting here where I am ($1-$4,999) the next bump is at the $20K-$40K slot and 14% of us are making over $100K... I can be top 14%!





I will believe forever that publishing route should be a match of goals, genre and personality, but I am SO RELIEVED to see I am not dooming myself going about this sort of willy-nilly as I am... I'd felt very uncommitted...but I'm NOT uncommitted! I am a THING! A HYBRID!

Graham Parke: A Month to Charity...

My buddy Graham Parke is donating all his writing income this month to an international children's helpline and asked me if I'd help him spread the word... it sounded like it was a great cause, so I agreed... but I'll let HIM tell you about it.



Welcome Graham!








“I'm very polite by nature, even the voices in my head let each other finish their sentences.” – from Completely Flappable






Don’t you just hate it when you have a thousand little thoughts rattling around your brain, good for nothing but keeping you up at night? Ideas, worries, mental reminders for the next day? My voices can get pretty insistent, and mostly this is a nuisance, but sometimes it’s okay, when there’s a story idea or two among the ramblings. And rarely, very rarely, I get what I think is a really good idea, but one that I don't know what to do with.



For instance, a while ago it occurred to me that it’s probably not governments or big corporations that wield the world’s greatest financial power. I think it’s us. All the little people together. Then I started wondering what could happen if we all decided to set 1 month of our incomes aside towards fixing this place up a bit. How many of the world’s problems could we actually solve permanently? Half of them, maybe? All of them? That's a pretty cool picture.



But I’m a pretty dim light when it comes to implementing even small ideas, never mind the big ones. So I’m not sure how to get that ball rolling (heck, I'm not even sure where we keep the balls). But I can certainly start with myself. That’s easy enough (I’ve been in close contact with myself for years; I didn't have much trouble convincing myself.)



So, this December, all proceeds of all my novels will go to Child Helpline International. The CHI is pretty cool because they support toll-free child helplines worldwide and they help highlight gaps in child protection systems. They do all this on donations (click the image below for more information.)







But what does all this have to do with you? Well, I'm raffling off some prizes and giving out some freebees to boost the donation (expenses out of my own pocket, not the donation :P )



So what's in it for you, besides that warm, fuzzy feeling you'll get knowing the Xmas presents you’re buying include an automatic donation? Well, how about I give you the new edition to the award winning No Hope for Gomez saga completely free?



And how about a Kindle Fire HD raffle ticket with every purchase while we’re at it?



Simply forward your receipt emails to nohopeforgomez@gmail.com to participate.



And now, on to the pitch. This is the bit where I try to convince you, using only my words, that my novels don’t suck (or at least, not too much.) That they won’t only tickle your brain, but they’ll actually make your life better, if only marginally. That they are, in fact, worthy donation material. Here goes (fingers crossed)...






Paper: $6.08

Kindle:$2.99

(uk paper, kindle)


No Hope for Gomez!

Winner of the Forewords Book of the Year Awards, featured on Kirkus Best Indie List 2011, IBA and USA Book News Award nominee.
It's the age-old tale:



  Boy meets girl.

  Boy stalks girl.

  Girl already has a stalker.

  Boy becomes her stalker-stalker.



We've seen it all before, many times, but this time it's different. If only slightly.


"Extremely witty writing containing keen insights into human nature." --California Chronicle

"Challenges the way we think about, and interact with, the world around us." --Kirkus Discoveries

"The antics in this book will leave the reader laughing. Graham Parke is a genius."--Reader's Favorite




Unspent Time
Warning: reading this novel may make you more attractive and elevate your random luck by about 9.332%*


(*These statements have not been evaluated by anyone of consequence)
Permeating the cracks between the past and the present is the realm of Unspent Time. Time that was allotted but never spent. In this realm we find the stories that could have been true. Such as the story of the designer of the color scheme used inside your shoe, or the story of Goki Feng Ho: the Chinese art of decoding the secret meaning of car license plates.



Paper: $6.08

Kindle:$2.99

ePub : $2.99

(uk paper, kindle)


“Captivating. Each story fired up my imagination.” – Alan H. Jordan, author.

"Delightfully mad. Graham's vibrant characters shine from the first page." --Tahlia Newland, author.







Free with this event


Completely Flappable

“He’s completely flappable!”

“Don’t you mean he’s unflappable?”

“Not really. He can very easily be flapped.”
Gomez has never been on a date. In his 27 years on the planet he’s never been able to quite close the deal. For some reason, circumstances always conspire to make his meet-ups with women less than official dates. But now a blond German girl with freckles has moved into his building and he decides it’s time to get his act together.



If you've read this far, you're already my hero ;)

I hope you like my idea enough to join me in this fun adventure. Let's see how much we can raise this Xmas ;)



Kind regards,



Graham Parke