Scott Adams's Blog, page 377

Researchers Rediscover Duh

Researchers discovered that people can pick CEOs out of a lineup. Sort of.

http://economictimes.indiatimes.com/News/CEOs-who-look-the-part-also-earn-more/articleshow/5863692.cms

The media interpreted the research as indicating that looking like a CEO might help you become one. I have to toss you a tiny "duh" on that. Yes, looks matter. But is that the bigger story?

I gave up trying to burrow down to the original research because Windows kept sending me down the Binghole. Perhaps the resear...

The Horoscope of Investing

I assume that most readers of this blog don't believe in astrology, since there is no scientific evidence whatsoever to support it. But do you believe investors should rebalance their investment portfolios every year?

Suppose you start out with a balance of 70% stocks (in broad market ETFs) and 30% bonds, which for some reason you think is right for you, and your stocks have a good year. Now you're at 80% stocks and 20% bonds. Should you rebalance?

I think we can all agree that if something h...

There's Nothing Funny About This

Did you see the story about the Chinese man who died after his friends inserted a live eel into his rectum as a practical joke when the man was asleep?

http://www.practicalfishkeeping.co.uk/content.php?sid=2778

This tragic situation, which I think we all agree is not funny, raises many questions.

 1. With friends like that, who needs enemas?  

2. How low did this man set the bar for friends?  

3. What were his friends imbibing when they came up with this idea, and how can I ...

World's Simplest Portfolio

Investing is scary because the world of finance is the ultimate confusopoly. There are so many options from which to choose that many people are willing to pay perhaps 1% of their portfolios per year for experts to manage their money. And those experts might invest your money in managed mutual funds (managed by yet other experts) that charge you another 1% to pick stocks for you. And this is despite the fact that on average, experts can't beat a monkey with a dartboard when it comes to pick...

The Myth of Multitasking

French researchers offer some insight into why you actually can walk and chew gum at the same time, but when add a third task, things go balls up.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/8622137.stm

Upon seeing this report, I immediately thought of those of you who are single. You can add this concept to your seduction tool bag. For example, always phrase your romantic offers in the form of multiple choices instead of yes/no questions.

Don't: "Would you like to go to dinner with me tonight?"

Do:...

The Dilbert Cookbook

One of you humorously suggested that I write a Dilbert Cookbook. My initial reaction was that a Dilbert Cookbook would make as much sense as Dilbert lingerie. It's simply a bad match. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized I would use a cookbook that was designed for a Dilbert sensibility.

For starters, the Dilbert cookbook would be in the form of a website and an app. That gives you a chance to solve the first and biggest problem of all physical cookbooks: the tedious texty in...

Confusopoly Hearings

Don't get used to it, but here's another unfinished comic that would have gone stale if I waited to publish it in newspapers.

That Lost 4G Phone

Two questions I am often asked:
How far in advance do you work?How quickly can you publish a comic on a current event? Today I will indirectly answer both questions by talking about something else entirely. I assume you've all been following the story of the Apple engineer who left a prototype 4G iPhone at a beer garden. I found this story too delicious to resist, but I worried that the story would become stale before my comics would work through the pipeline. I think the soones...

The Geek Tingle

Possibly the most geeky thing about me, if I can pick just one thing, is that I get all tingly when I hear about new business models. For example, I got a tingly feeling the first time I heard about iTunes. I get the same feeling every time I buy a book in less than a minute from Amazon.

I'm also fascinated when an improved user interface causes an entirely new product to be created from something old. For example, auctions have been around forever, but eBay made it so easy that they create...

Dinner for Five

Shelly and I invited some good friends and their young son over for dinner and a movie last Friday. Earlier that week, while pretending to be an extra-wonderful husband, I told Shelly, I would "do everything." I wanted her to relax and enjoy the evening for a change. Normally Shelly would be the project manager and main operative for this sort of event. The only condition of my offer was that Shelly would need to accept a lower-than-monkeys-can-do-it standard of quality for the evening. She...