Scott Adams's Blog, page 304

December 29, 2014

Do Successful People have Goals?

James Altucher has a great summary of his many interviews with successful people (including me). Do successful people talk about their personal goals? Not so much. That has been my observation as well. Great read.



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Scott Adams
Co-founder of CalendarTree.com     
Author of this book 
Twitter Dilbert: @Dilbert_Daily
Twitter for Scott: @ScottAdamsSays


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Published on December 29, 2014 13:58

December 28, 2014

Systems Versus Goals again


Those of you who were nice enough to read my latest book (How to Fail...) will recognize my writing as the uncredited source material for this video. The credit information probably got separated from the product at some point. 
In any event, the systems-versus-goals idea seems to be taking on a life of its own. I like that.

--------------------

Scott Adams
Co-founder of CalendarTree.com     
Author of this book 

Twitter Dilbert: @Dilbert_Daily

 Twitter for Scott: @ScottAdamsSays







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Published on December 28, 2014 23:00

Do Successful People have Goals?

James Altucher has a great summary of his many interviews with successful people (including me). Do successful people talk about their personal goals? Not so much. That has been my observation as well. Great read.

--------------------

 

Scott Adams
Co-founder of CalendarTree.com     
Author of this book 

Twitter Dilbert: @Dilbert_Daily

Twitter for Scott: @ScottAdamsSays

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Published on December 28, 2014 23:00

December 21, 2014

The Christmas Chair

When I was 12-years old, my mother and I worked together to build a chair out of parts from other chairs. It was our little mom-and-son project. We took the top of an old painted chair with legs and attached it to the swivel bottom from a different chair. My mother reupholstered the back and I refinished the wood and added new wheels.

We did not possess any of the skills necessary to make a new chair form old chairs, and the result showed. The caster wheels would often fall out. The chair was wobbly and unstable. To an unfamiliar sitter it was a death trap.

And it was my most valued possession.

When I went to college, I took only a trunk of clothes, some toiletries, and my chair.

I sat in that chair every day of college, trying to be the first in my family to graduate with a 4-year degree. My mother was raised on a farm. She became homeless as a teen when her mentally ill father chased her and her mother away at the threat of death. They left with the clothes on their backs, running for their lives. They made it to town on foot. A family took them in and they rebuilt.

My mother was engaged to my father at sixteen and married at eighteen. She was twenty when I was born. And she had something to prove.

From my earliest memories she drilled into me some basic facts about my future:

1.      You're going to college.
2.      Someday you will be rich.
3.      Be useful.

She didn't have to teach me that I shouldn't give up when things get tough. I simply never saw anyone give up about anything when I grew up. Giving up wasn't even a thing. I didn't know people gave up on things until I got into college.

After college I moved to California to start my life. I took two suitcases with me. But as soon as I was settled I had my chair shipped out. I sat in that chair every day, planning my future, sometimes doodling.

I was sitting in my chair when I created the first Dilbert comic. I was sitting in my chair when United Media called and offered me a contract to be a syndicated cartoonist. I was sitting in my chair when my publisher first called to tell me that my first book, The Dilbert Principle, was the #1 bestselling book in the country.

Eventually my chair succumbed to age and it became too dangerous to sit in. I moved it to a storage room and replaced it with a fancy office chair.

Last week my parents' estate finally got settled. My mother passed first, a few years ago, and as these things so often go, my father slid downhill fast and joined her. When the final distribution checks arrived to the three siblings, I emailed my sister in New York and my brother near Los Angeles to call out something extraordinary: The three of us had navigated the distribution of the estate, and a million decisions, (with my sister in the lead) without a single disagreement. Not one. If you have witnessed sibling behavior during this sort of situation, you know it is unusual to have no disputes. Sometimes you don't know what your parents taught you until you DON'T have a problem. I was deeply impressed with whatever they did to make the three of us so reasonable.

And so I pulled my old chair out of storage. I couldn't quit on it. I don't know how. I also don't know how to restore iron, refinish wood the right way, or attach new wheels to over-sized and worn-out caster holes. But I will learn. And when I'm done, the chair will be better than it ever was.

I had held off from updating the chair because I wanted to keep it exactly as it was, to keep the memory alive. But I remembered how my mother thought, and I know she wouldn't have approved of an old chair that wasn't useful.

This one's for you, Mom.


-----------------------------------

Scott Adams
Co-founder of CalendarTree.com     
Author of this book  
Twitter Dilbert: @Dilbert_Daily
Twitter for Scott: @ScottAdamsSays

 

 

 

 

 

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Published on December 21, 2014 23:00

December 18, 2014

Sony and the Hackers

A lot of film industry folks are upset that Sony caved to hacker threats, presumably from North Korea, and cancelled release of the new Seth Rogan movie The Interview. The problem, say the critics, is that caving to terrorists might embolden future hackers to do more of this sort of thing. Maybe someday it will be hard to get a movie made if it has any controversial elements.

Keep in mind that Sony execs have been deeply embarrassed by the release of emails and there are probably more gems that could be released. And of course you have the threat of a 9-11 type terror attack if someone runs the movie.

I have a few thoughts on this issue.

For starters, if you believe that the individuals working at Sony should take personal risks with their lives and the lives of their families so you can see more shitty movies, you might be a bit of a terrorist yourself.

Is it Sony's job to protect the American constitution? No. Their job is making money and trying to keep their employees and customers safe. How are they doing? Well, I would say that greenlighting the project was a mistake, in hindsight, but they certainly made up for it by eating a gazillion dollars of nearly guaranteed movie profit this year. I call that gutsy and smart. And they also don't seem to be putting the blame on anyone else for getting into this situation. I give them A+ for their handling of the situation recently.

Are you truly worse off if there are fewer movies featuring dictators with exploding heads? I have a hard time seeing this as a slippery slope that prevents another Transformers movie from getting made. It might prevent more movies about North Korean dictators. Will you miss those? Team America was hilarious, but how many of those do we need?

We already have no Hollywood movies being made about the early days of Islam, presumably because no studio wants to be targeted. Have you missed those movies?

There is a 100% chance that I will someday see the banned Seth Rogan movie. I'll watch anything with Seth Rogan. He earned that. And the Internet is too leaky to stop it from happening in the long run. Someday Sony will release it and make their money. No one loses anything in the long run.

Keep in mind that you and I don't know what other bombshells are in the hacked files. But Sony probably knows, or suspects. So they are not operating on the same limited information that you are. That alone is reason to not second-guess their decision.

Do any of you believe that Sony employees should risk their lives, and the lives of movie-goers, so you can see more movies about dictators?

Disclaimer:
I have worked with Sony on Dilbert projects in the past and might again someday.

----------------

Scott Adams
Co-founder of CalendarTree.com     
Author of this book 

Twitter Dilbert: @Dilbert_Daily

Twitter for Scott: @ScottAdamsSays

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Published on December 18, 2014 23:00

Microsoft Goes After Fake Tech Support Scammers

I don't know if this has anything to do with my recent computer problems but you can see from this story why a Microsoft tech support number has to be viewed with skepticism.



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Published on December 18, 2014 23:00

December 17, 2014

Does Science Work?

Earlier this year I worked with Dr. Carmen Simon at Rexi Media to create a memorable SlideShare presentation of my latest book. Did Dr. Simon's double-doctorate and fancy brain science make any difference to the outcome?

Today I learned that out of millions of presentations on the SlideShare site, our work was picked as a Best of 2014.

Given that my book was not a best-seller or even close, one has to assume my sparkling content was not the reason for the achievement. Science wins again.

To be fair, the other millions of creators are probably still operating at the "People like blue" level of design. While no one was paying attention, the job of designing moved from art to science.

Ever wonder why Apple consistently does great design and others can't seem to figure it out? My assumption is that Apple is using science and other companies are using art. I once worked in the Human Interface test lab at Pacific Bell and saw how powerful science is when applied to design. And science has learned a lot since those days.

--- And now I talk about robots again ---

I have a Dilbert series in the pipeline in which robots learn cognitive science simply by reading the Internet. All of the science is there. Robots thus informed could control human decisions without us being the wiser.

In other words, robots will never need a bloody coup to take control of Earth. All they need to do is read the Internet where we humans have painstakingly documented the science that will allow robots to manipulate our emotions and thus our choices without our knowledge.

My guess is that most of you think this cognitive science stuff is only influencing group averages and isn't much of a factor in your own daily decisions. But I will tell you that if you have a background in hypnosis and you have wallowed in this cognitive science stuff as I have for both work and fun, you see it as a far more powerful force, and possibly the only important trend for the future.

Someday robots will fix most of humanity's problems in the areas of energy, food, water, medicine and even climate change. They might even make war obsolete. But in the process of solving these problems the robots will acquire cognitive science knowledge that will effectively give them control of any democratic country because they can control the majority opinion through cognitive manipulation.

And even more interesting is the question of whether humans will someday prefer machine-based government over human control. I don't want some human telling me how to live my life based on his belief in magic. But I don't get angry at my ATM for only giving me the amount of money that I have in my own account. The machines will follow agreed rules and be predictable. I want a machine overlord, not some corrupt, drunken, horny, tired human that had a bad childhood.

But that's just me.

Scott Adams
Co-founder of CalendarTree.com     
Author of this book 
Twitter Dilbert: @Dilbert_Daily
Twitter for Scott: @ScottAdamsSays

 

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Published on December 17, 2014 23:00

December 16, 2014

Boring Little Story About My Windows Computer

I wouldn't bother reading this if I were you.  I'm just venting.

The story goes like this...

Bought a Gateway computer from Best Buy

It breaks, as electronics do when near me.

Independent computer repair guy replaces a bad board.

Windows thinks I have a new machine because it doesn't see the same hardware mix. I have learned that Windows checks the hardware for that reason.

Windows starts its "pesterware" process to bug me into buying a legal copy, which I already have. Knowing my copy is legal, I assume I have malware that is trying to trick me.

I did have the Conduit virus, which I mistakenly believed was related to my Windows authorization problem. But in any case, I needed to remove the malware just to know what my baseline was.

I called what I labelled in my prior post the "fake" Microsoft number and got a rep who said he worked for Microsoft. When I explained that I have a legal copy and don't want to buy a new one, he told me their global network was down and I should call back in two hours.

I called the next day and explained again that I have a legal copy and want to know how to authenticate my machine. Again, by amazing "coincidence" the rep said their global network was down and they could not help. I asked for a supervisor.

I called bullshit on the "global network is down" and told him I got the same story yesterday. I asked him to verify that the network was down both days. He said it was definitely NOT down at all yesterday when the rep said it was.

That was the moment I unloaded on him for being either a fraud or managing a bunch of folks who are somehow incented to get me off the phone if I don't whip out a credit card in the first ten seconds to buy a new copy. The supervisor said they do not have any incentives, just salary. Some part of the story was bullshit, so I unloaded on him. His next five minutes were not pleasant.

The folks I spoke with were all Indian-sounding, so this was presumably an Indian call center of some sort.

Then I called a "real" Microsoft number and asked if the last guys I called were real or fake. The real Microsoft rep, who sounded American, confirmed that the other phone number is not genuine. Moreover, she confirmed that if I had called a number because of a pop-up error on my screen it was definitely not Microsoft because they don't ever show you a number and ask you to call to fix a problem. She said that is policy. (And it makes sense because no one wants customers calling.)

On a second day, I called the real Microsoft number and got another American-sounding rep who also confirmed that the other number is a scam. I'm not sure how, but he said he was familiar with this malware and Microsoft was trying to track down the perps. They even knew the cities where they operate.

But the second rep also mis-diagnosed my problem as the Conduit virus (which was a coincidental problem) so he might have been confused about the rest as well.

Yesterday one of the commenters here called the real Microsoft number to ask if my "fake" number was really fake. At first the rep said it was fake and later in the conversation confirmed it was genuine. If you are keeping score, that is three official Microsoft opinions that the other number is fake and one opinion that it is not.

Today I called the "fake" number again and got someone who - as far as I could tell - was an actual Microsoft employee, or at least he did a better impression of one. His first suggestion was a simple command prompt of "slui 3" to bring up a window to enter my legal Windows authorization code, which I had from the sticker on the machine.

This process didn't work, and the new error message prompted the real Microsoft rep to say only the manufacturer of the computer (Gateway) can fix the problem. So I have to call them.

It is not possible to call Gateway, as far as I can tell.

So my current working theory is that Windows 7 is the malware, in effect. It is illegitimately forcing me to buy a "legal" copy when I already own one, and there is no workaround. The alternative is to throw away my machine, or reformat and try over I suppose, but even then I would need to buy a new copy of Windows. And Windows 8 isn't even a real product.

My best guess about the Indian call center - which might actually be Microsoft - is that they have either a fraud problem, an employee incentive problem, or a training problem within the organization because I'm willing to bet that the network is never down when you offer to pay for a new copy of Windows.

So, anyway, eventually I did solve the malware problem. You might have heard of this solution. I'll show you a picture.

 

Disclosure: I own Apple stock.  I was a Mac user for the first half of my career and those crash-puppies have collectively eaten over a month of my work in the past. I don't expect the new one to be better. But it won't have the SAME problem and I'm tired of the old one.

[Update: People often ask where I get my ideas. Here's a sneak preview of the first panels of a Sunday comic I am working on today. I think that answers some of the question.



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Published on December 16, 2014 23:00

December 14, 2014

Ineffective Government

Nearly 100% of the well-informed and honest citizens of the United States agree that the Federal Government should not be in the business of weed-policing in states that allow medical marijuana.

That's an easy law to change, right? I mean, if something like 80% of voters agree on an issue, it's a no-brainer.

But our ineffective government couldn't pass a law that had overwhelming support because, I suppose, it is bad for reelection if someone labels you pro-drug.So instead, Congress quietly just removed funding for the FBI's weed-chasing efforts. No budget means no action in the future. In effect, the federal war on weed is over.

While I appreciate that the government is moving in the direction the citizens prefer, how much does it tell you about the effectiveness of our system that lawmakers couldn't change a law that nearly 100% of well-informed and honest (meaning not taking money from private prison lobbyists for example) folks prefer?

My point is not about weed. That fight is essentially over. We're just waiting for the referee to count to ten, although that might play out over several years. Full legalization for adults (in effect) is inevitable because the data will be so clear after a few states do their test runs.

My point is that if your government can't pass a law that has has nearly universal approval, do you really have a functioning government?
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Published on December 14, 2014 23:00

December 10, 2014

An Opportunity to Shout at Assholes

Recently I wasn't paying attention and clicked something I shouldn't have. I got the Conduit virus on my Windows machine and it dug in deep.
It's a clever virus. Normal antivirus and malware products can't even see it. I lost a week of work. I've already warned my syndicate there might be a missing week of Dilbert unless I pull a rabbit out of the hat.
The virus generates a pop-up window pretending to be Microsoft. The message says you don't have an authentic version of Windows but if you call their number they will sell you one.
Before I continue, I did verify with Microsoft that the message is fake. Microsoft never tells you to call them. And they are aware of this scam. Their tech finally got it off my machine.
I called the scammers' phone number. They do an amazing imitation of a Microsoft call center. Apparently they studied Microsoft's actual processes and they trained good scam actors. I pretended to be an ignorant customer for a few minutes just to draw them out. A pleasant, Indian-sounding fellow patiently answered my questions.
Did I mention I was mad because I lost a week of productivity to these assholes?
I might have done some yelling. There might have been profanity. Okay, to be honest, I was foaming at the mouth and inventing insults that even impressed me. I screamed about his criminal ways, implored him to seek honest work or kill himself to make the world a better place. I told him to fuck himself seven different styles. And I was just getting started.
And he stayed on the phone, keeping in character to the scam, trying to calm me down like a real help desk person.
I even got him to put his "supervisor" on the line so I could insult his lineage, competence, and preferences for bestiality. He took it too. This was fun!
Then I told them they had 60 seconds to tell me how to remove their virus or I would publish their phone number in a natiional blog so everyone can call and insult them.
I started counting from 60 to zero, stopping occasionally to remind him how fucked he was. He sounded a bit worried but stayed in character. 
So here you go: The scammers are at 1-866-530-6599. Please call them and pretend to be a customer so you waste their time before you go off on them. Be creative. Be mean. And please yell. It's a free pass. The number will change soon, I assume, so act quickly.
Just tell them you got a pop-up message saying you don't have an authentic version of Windows 7 and you want to know what to do.
It's a lot of fun. Let me know how it goes.
I also thought it would be useful to publish the phone number so search engines can find it in case anyone in the future wants to verify it as a scam.
Scott
[update: virus is still on my computer. Microsoft failed to remove it too. I recalled the number I posted to confirm it is the scammers not Microsoft. Part of the scam is that they tell you to Google their number and it does show as a real Microsoft number. You can confirm they are fake (but extraordinarily convincing) by asking if the message in your computer to call them is real. Microsoft never asks you to call them. That is policy. ]
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Published on December 10, 2014 23:00

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