Joel Garfinkle's Blog, page 5

Celebrate Failure

“I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”

~Thomas Edison~

Trevor wanted his people to be pillars of innovation and creativity. When he came to me for coaching around innovation, he mentioned how fearful his team was in taking risks and possibly touching failure. I asked him, “What are you doing to celebrate failures?” Like many leaders, he had no answer. We then looked at some fun ways that corporate leaders have learned to take their failures and celebrate them. In doing so, they help their most creative people to develop exciting new ideas.

Celebrating your failures is just as important as celebrating your success. Here’s some ideas for you.

Hold an Idea Funeral

Holding an idea funeral is a fun way to learn from the failure as a group, as Annabel Acton says in an Inc. article. Take turns eulogizing the idea or project you’re “burying,” sharing lessons learned. Focus on its merits as well as the reasons it ultimately failed. This creates a culture of trying out new ideas and learning from the results. “Startup funerals” have taken off as well, as budding entrepreneurs are increasingly embracing failure as a stepping-stone to success.
Create a Fail Wall

The finance website NerdWallet creates a “Fail Wall” where mistakes are posted, emphasizing that everyone fails and honoring outside-the-box thinking. Why not set up a “Fail Wall” in your own workplace? Give it a brightly colored banner and encourage people to write down their failures on post-it notes and stick them on the wall.
Give a Heroic Failure award

Advertising company Grey gives a “Heroic Failure” award to employees who take ambitious risks and go down in flames. Giving this award changes the culture of feeling shame or humiliation if a risk doesn’t pan out. Rather than letting failure become part of people’s identity, they become branded as risk-takers.
Hold a “F— Up Night”

In a popular social meetup event called “F— Up Nights,” a handful of entrepreneurs tell their stories about failure, followed by a Q&A session. These events been held in over 250 cities across 80 countries. Hold a similar event with your own people, encouraging everyone to take a turn at the mic. If it’s a hit, hold a series of them so everyone gets time to share and ask questions. Find a fun way to host the event outside of the office, like reserving a large room at a restaurant or finding a community space that hosts performances.
Record What You’ve Tried

Keep a track record of failures, with detailed information about what people tried. Just as a failed cancer drug proved incredibly useful for managing the AIDS virus, a past failure can become a wild success in a different context. Take notes on why the idea failed—it might succeed under the right conditions, or if certain aspects of it are revamped.

It’s most fitting to celebrate failures related to innovation, rather than execution, Harvard Business Review points out. You want to celebrate the failures that show you took a leap. If someone failed to follow through on a task, you obviously won’t want to throw a party. If she gave her all in a new project and it just didn’t achieve the desired results, that’s different. Celebrating those kinds of failures will help your people learn to fail gracefully, growing from the experience.

Most importantly, stop thinking—and talking—in terms of “win/lose.” When you eliminate the shame around failure, and show it’s okay to be vulnerable, people can talk about it. That means they can learn from it, finding the germ of a great idea within it.

Want more advice on boosting creativity and innovation in your company? Hire leadership coach Joel Garfinkle so he can help you develop and implement ideas that get results.

Conduct your OWN performance Review

“I think self-awareness is probably the most important thing towards being a champion.”

~Billie Jean King~

Client Clara asks: I always get so nervous before my annual performance review. How can I calm my nerves and make sure it goes as well as possible?

Coach Joel answers: Performance reviews can be daunting, but being proactive about the process will make it a motivating ritual that you look forward to. By conducting a review of your own performance before you meet with your boss, you’ll have thoughtful answers to all your boss’s questions. Here’s your guide on how to do that.

Frequency

Your boss might conduct performance reviews once a year, every six months, or on a quarterly basis. Forty-eight percent of employees are reviewed annually, and 26% are reviewed less than once a year, says Gallup. More frequent reviews are optimal, allowing you to recollect more of what happened during the review period.

Aim to conduct your own performance review on a quarterly basis. Even if your boss only conducts reviews once a year, you’ll have detailed notes from each quarter to use in preparing for your annual review.

Purpose

According to Gallup’s research, good performance reviews are “achievement-oriented, fair and accurate, and developmental.” Gallup suggests calling them “progress reviews” to emphasize these areas of focus.

In other words, they should be less about a grade and instead focused on utilizing the performance review process to continue developing your skills.

Elements

Evaluating fulfillment of the role

Look at the description of your role. Then ask yourself how well you’re fulfilling each of your primary responsibilities.
Ask yourself if the expectations are fair, and if you have adequate time and resources to fulfill the role, advises Gallup. If not, determine what changes are necessary.


Reviewing your past goals

Look at the work performance goals you set for the period you’re reviewing. Where did you achieve them, and where did you fall short?
Analyze what went wrong when your efforts didn’t succeed.

Make a list of the areas you want to strengthen.


Acknowledging successes

List and share your achievements, both concrete and less tangible.
Have you developed any new skills, even if you haven’t put them to extensive use yet? Be sure to add them to your list, so you can make them known to your boss.


Examining your leveraging of success

Ask yourself how you leveraged your successes, advises Sharon Armstrong in The Essential Performance Review Handbook. Have you effectively used them to boost your visibility and influence?
Consider where you could leverage successes better in the future.
Create a visibility plan outlining how you’ll do that.


Setting goals

Now it’s time to set new goals for the next period. Make sure your goals are SMART—“strategic and specific, measurable, attainable, results-based, and time-bound”—emphasize Anne Conzemius and Jan O’Neill in The Power of SMART Goals.
Consider what actions you’ll need to take to reach your goals. For example, if you want a promotion, look at options in your company and prepare a compelling argument for why you should get one.


Developing ideas

Write up specific proposals for ideas you wish to pursue, suggests Armstrong. Generate ideas that will challenge you and emphasize the skills you want to highlight.
If you have ideas for how the department or company could improve, write them down as well.


Evaluating salary

Research the typical salary in your geographical area for someone in your role. Factor in your level of experience as well. This will help with your salary negotiation.
Ask yourself if you’re earning what you should be, and if not, what type of pay raise you should ask for.

By conducting a review of your own performance, you’ll feel energized and inspired at performance review time. Plus, you’ll come across as far more articulate, insightful, and capable during your meeting with your boss. And in turn, you’ll make better use of that meeting, coming equipped with questions to ask and polished ideas to present.

Hire leadership coach Joel Garfinkle for more advice on preparing for career advancement.

Network after Work

“Networking is an essential part of building wealth.”

~Armstrong Williams~

Liam didn’t drink, so when his coworkers went to the bar after work, he’d say goodbye and head home. Sure, he was missing out on the chance to socialize, but it wasn’t really his scene. Then his sister shared some interesting statistics about the effectiveness of networking after work.

Over the past couple of decades, many studies have shown a relationship between social drinking, socializing, and higher wages, she told him. Moderate social drinkers earn 10% more than those who abstain, a study from the University of Calgary found. Another study in the Journal of Labor Research found that the average male employee who drinks socially earns 19% more than those who abstain, and the average female employee who drinks socially earns 23% more than abstainers. Male employees who go to bars at least once a month earn an extra 7% on top of that.

It’s not about the alcohol consumption. It’s all about building and improving relationships. Sequestering themselves away from the drinking crowd is the main reason why non-drinkers lose these opportunities, according to a study at North Carolina State University.

Moderate drinkers may be perceived as more charismatic, and they certainly get to know their drinking buddies much better than they otherwise would. Social drinking is a highly effective networking strategy—and even non-drinkers can get in on it. If you’re a non-drinker, here’s how to overcome some common alcohol-related hurdles and share all the social benefits that drinkers get. (If you’ve dealt with addiction and find being around alcohol too triggering, see the tips at the end.)

Problem: Drinking is an effective inter-office, after-work networking vehicle. As mentioned, those who drink tend to earn more than colleagues who abstain. Hanging out at the bar is a proven way to foster relationships outside of the office. But because you don’t drink, you’re missing out.

Solution: Go to the bar and enjoy some time with your colleagues. Don’t let the venue stop you from using this opportunity to form working relationship bonds with your coworkers and supervisors. Order a non-alcoholic drink. (Chances are, you won’t be the only one not drinking.) Show them you can have fun along with the rest of them, and soon they won’t even notice you’re not drinking! Here are a couple other pointers:

Ensure people you have no problem with their drinking. They might feel awkward, wondering if you’re judging them, which you can dispel with a few words and an accepting attitude. If you want, share a reason for not drinking that focuses on you, like “Alcohol makes me tired, and I want to enjoy myself.”
If coworkers tend to drink heavily and that makes you uncomfortable, excuse yourself early, saying you have to get up early the next morning.

Problem: Drinking is part of the company culture. For many companies, drinking during work hours is frowned upon. Some even have a no-tolerance policy. However, there are a few where having a drink at lunch or in the afternoon on Friday is part of the company culture. Others are experimenting with having beers during brainstorming sessions to loosen things up. Refusing the libations can set you apart as an outsider.

Solution: Participate without the drink. Be sure to include yourself in those martini lunches. If Friday afternoon is the time when everyone relaxes in the conference room with a beer before heading home, be sure to be in there too. Show them you can relax and unwind with the rest of the team, even without the alcohol.

Problem: Entertaining clients often requires taking them out for drinks. You have a client in town, and it’s your job to make sure he’s enjoying himself. Taking him out for drinks and dinner is part of your job duties. Refusing these duties can definitely hurt your career.

Solution: Go and have fun with your client! Even if you don’t drink yourself, there’s no reason why you can’t take clients out and show them a good time. They may even appreciate the fact that you’re going to be the designated driver, so they won’t have to worry about making it back to their hotel safe and sound. Plus, you’ll be able to keep your wits about you and massage the relationship to your company’s benefit while their inhibitions are lowered thanks to alcohol. Secrets and soft spots may be revealed!

You don’t have to spend multiple nights at the bar each week to get all these benefits. Even going once in a while will increase your visibility among your coworkers and build your social cache.

If you’re a recovering alcoholic and find being in situations like bars too triggering, reach out to coworkers in other ways. They’re not likely to move from the bar to another venue, but perhaps you could start meeting colleagues for breakfast once a month or so. The main goal is to build relationships by networking after work, showing them what a fun and interesting person you are!

Social drinking might have a definite place in your company’s culture. Contact leadership coach Joel Garfinkle to learn how to build relationships and become more influential at work.

5 Tips on How to become a Better Boss

“The speed of the boss is the speed of the team.”

~Lee Iacocca~

Tom had been working as a manager for almost a year. He was good at evaluating people’s performance, pointing out areas for improvement, and saying “thank you” often. To him, those were the things that a good boss did.

However, when Tom sat down with his mentor to talk about his progress, his mentor told him that those things are just the tip of the iceberg. “One of the hallmark qualities of a great boss is that he’s always striving to improve,” said his mentor. “Here are 5 tips on how to become a better boss. You’ll be the kind of boss who inspires tremendous loyalty, innovation, and respect from his people.”

Inspires a Shared Vision

Hone your understanding of your organization’s vision. Talking in-depth about vision with company leaders will give you a better grasp of it. Even if you’re not a high-level leader, understanding how your department fits into the big picture will help you and your people excel. Then instill the vision in your people. At the beginning of a meeting, talk about how the project you’re presenting furthers the organization’s vision and mission. People will have a stronger grasp of their importance, and in turn, greater motivation, when they share the vision and goals.
Be a Great PR Agent

To be a better boss, show how much you care about your people’s success. Sing your people’s praises in front of colleagues and superiors. This shows you’re committed to their advancement. Let them hear you giving praise, but don’t hold back if they’re out of earshot, either. If you speak highly of them in a private meeting with your own boss, mention it to them later. Your loyalty to them will increase their loyalty to you.
Have Difficult Conversations

Embrace difficult conversations, seeing them as an opportunity for growth. A great boss is a pro at conflict resolution, and puts his mediation skills to the test if coworkers have a problem to resolve. When he’s talking to people about improving their performance, he keeps a positive focus. His coaching skills guide them toward a better understanding of how they can strengthen their work.Next time you see a difficult conversation on the horizon, ask yourself how you can make it a positive experience. Seize upon the opportunities for growth, and reflect on how you can act as a supportive coach rather than just calling out mistakes. If you want to learn more, read Practical Tactics for Crucial Communication.
Help People Envision Their Future

Help your employees craft their career plans, envisioning the future of their dreams. An outstanding boss asks plenty of questions that help people figure out where they want to go in their careers. She shows she’s invested in her employee’s happiness. Her people look at her as a wise mentor rather than someone who’s there to criticize them.
Focus on Work/Life Balance

Don’t assume that people will come to you to talk about problems with work/life balance. They may feel ashamed that they’re feeling burned out and stressed, or worried about your response. Check in with employees about their work/life balance regularly. If they’re having an issue, brainstorm solutions with them, being as accommodating as you can reasonably be.

Tom agreed to work on growing in these ways over the next several months. As time went on, people stopped seeing him as just a supervisor and started seeing him as a valued mentor and coach. Their trust and loyalty skyrocketed, and they felt encouraged to think creatively and take risks. Knowing they had a great boss behind them, they felt there was nothing they couldn’t accomplish together. With these tips on how to become a better boss, you’ll get there soon too, even if you’re not well on your way already!

Whether you’re an experienced boss or an aspiring one, reach out to Joel for Leadership Coaching Program.

9 Tips to Effectively Manage your Online Reputation

“It takes 20 years to build a reputation and five minutes to ruin it. If you think about that, you’ll do things differently.”

~Warren Buffett~

Blake was about to submit his resume for several open positions. As he was Googling, he came across some unsettling articles on how bosses look at candidates’ social media. Before he applied, he decided to make sure his online reputation wasn’t working against him. And he was glad he did—he found old photos from wild college parties on his Facebook account, and some ancient blog posts sharing way too much detail about his personal life.

According to a 2017 CareerBuilder survey, 70% of bosses screen job candidates’ social media profiles before hiring them. In 2016, it was 60%—that’s an increase of 10 percentage points in one year. There’s a good chance your boss, or a future one, will Google you.

Don’t let them find pictures of you drunk at a party doing something stupid. Careful online reputation management will ensure they see only your best image. Here’s how to do it.

GO ON THE DEFENSIVE:

Google yourself. The first step in cleaning up your online image is to find out what potentially embarrassing items are out there. Google yourself and see not only what sites come up, but what photos come up as well. If the sites and photos are harmless, then you’re in the clear. If not, you have some Internet housecleaning to do. Then sign up for Google alerts so every time your name appears online in the future, you’ll see it.
Set your online privacy. If you have some less-than-professional photos on Facebook, be sure to use the privacy filters Facebook offers. You can set your photos so only you see them, only your friends and their friends see them, or only certain people see them, instead of the general public.Your preferences on Flickr and other photo-sharing sites should always be set to private as well, unless you have a good reason for making them public. Err on the conservative side with possibly inappropriate photos and limit them to only your closest friends. Better yet, remove them completely.
Untag yourself. Oftentimes the most embarrassing photos aren’t the ones we’ve posted of ourselves; they’re the ones we can thank our fun-loving friends for. If your friends tag you in a photo, untag yourself. This way, even though that picture of you kissing a duck on New Year’s Eve is out there, it’s not associated with you specifically. The chance of someone even coming across it then drops exponentially.
Request to have material removed. If your compromising blog post has been cross-posted on another site, you could ask the webmaster to remove it. If the site tends to post controversial commentary and scathing critiques, however, you might want to let sleeping dogs lie. Stirring the pot could bring unwanted attention.
Reevaluate the groups you belong to. Unless you’re willing to risk potentially losing out on an employment opportunity for your beliefs, remove yourself from any borderline extreme or offensive groups. Again, this is the first impression an employer may have about you. Don’t turn them off with intolerance or morally or legally questionable groups.

TAKE INITIATIVE TO BUILD YOUR REPUTATION:

Only make posts that align with your personal brand. Remember, you can’t unring the Internet bell if you post an inappropriate status update, comment, or blog post. Strong management of your online reputation means choosing every piece of content wisely. Before hitting “Post,” think twice about what you’re sending. Is it something that could be taken negatively if a future employer were to see it? Or does it develop a personal brand as someone who is a pro in their field?Remember, employers may see these posts before having a chance to get to know you. This could be your only chance to make a first impression. Make it positive! Share tips based on your expertise, showing you’re not only skilled but also generous with your knowledge. Share your accomplishments, too!
Join new social media sites. Sign up for an account with Google+, LinkedIn, and other social media sites, especially those used for professional networking. If you already have such accounts, update your profile (you should be doing this at least once a year) and link to all your contacts in your network. Using Hootsuite will let you manage up to three social media profiles in the same place, pre-scheduling posts to save time.
Start a website. There may be things on the Internet that you simply cannot clean up. However, you can create new material that will push these older items down the search engine results. Purchase a website with your name and create a positive site with exactly the brand you want to have at work. Start a blog, using your name, and post positive content that highlights your knowledge and abilities. Use strong SEO terms to boost your site in the search results. Fill the Internet with positive, current content about you, and the negative material will be less likely to be found.
Get on Twitter. Following organizations and individuals that are respected in your field on Twitter will also help you build a positive online presence. Share useful articles on professional development and topics related to your field.

If your online reputation is really in dire straits, hiring an online reputation management professional might be in order. For most of us, however, a little legwork will do the trick. As you continue putting positive media out there, those old photos or posts will soon become a distant memory.

Here are 8 more tips on how to change the perception others have of you. As an executive coach, Joel Garfinkle is often hired to help leaders to learn how to manage their perceptions that others have of them so they can more easily move into higher levels of management.

Standing out at Work

“Stars don’t beg the world for attention; their beauty forces us to look up.”

~Matshona Dhliwayo~

Amelia asks: I’ve grown a lot more confident over the past year at my job. Now I need to learn how to stand out at work, because I’m looking toward a promotion. What steps should I take to make that happen?

Joel replies: Maybe you’ve played it safe in the past, figuring your good work should speak for itself. But you’re right—it won’t. You need a plan for catching the eye of those with influence in your organization, or they’ll never notice you. You need to speak up, be more confident and assertive at work.

Create a Personal Brand

Just as products need branding, so do people. Here’s how to create your personal brand:

Ask yourself what qualities make you who you are, including your shortcomings and idiosyncrasies. People who stand out at work are known for being their authentic selves. They know how to highlight their best qualities while asking for feedback in areas where they want to grow.
Consider your career goals—where do you want to go next? That will guide what you want to be known for.
Choose projects that highlight those strengths, rather than just saying “yes” to any work that comes your way. In doing so, you’ll craft a reputation as a person who’s great at the particular kind of work that really fuels you.
Track your successes so you’re always ready to describe them—say, in an impromptu conversation with that exec you’ve been wanting to meet.


Engage in Lifelong Learning

A person who remains perpetually curious, constantly looking for opportunities to grow, is sure to stand out at work. How can you do this?

Take a class in something you want to know more about.
Find a buddy from another department and teach each other about your roles, so you both understand the organization better.
Read a book about a skill you want to master.


Support a Good Cause

Either way, becoming known as someone who cares about the broader world will build you up in the eyes of others. Here are a couple ways of doing that:

Start volunteering with a nonprofit, if you don’t already. Casually mention to coworkers that you plan to volunteer over the weekend.
Hang a flyer for a donation drive on the bulletin board, and mention to coworkers that you’re supporting it. Make sure not to sound pushy or self-righteous about it.


Embrace Failure

People who stand out don’t hide behind small, safe successes—they seek out risks and take them. Of course, they’re smart about which risks are worthwhile, choosing ones they have a good chance of conquering. You won’t achieve them all, but you’ll enjoy some very exciting successes when you start seizing the day in these ways:

Ask yourself what risks you need to take to get where you really want to go.
Dive into a project that stretches your abilities, really challenging you.
Share the good news—and its measurable results—with coworkers and superiors when you succeed.


Speak Up in Meetings

Speaking up in meetings can be daunting, but it will get easier with time. Here are a few ways to start:

Figure out one topic on the agenda that you have a lot to say about. Prepare to ignite conversation on that topic.
Bring creative ideas that speak to the qualities you want to be known for.
Ask insightful questions when others present ideas.
Practice saying one thing that pops into your head at each meeting.


Become a Mentor

Serving as a mentor to others will highlight both your expertise and your concern for the organization’s success. When your boss sees coworkers coming to you for advice, you’re sure to stand out. Here’s how to begin:

Does your department have a new employee? Offer to show her the ropes. Just by being friendly and available to answer questions, you’ll start cultivating a strong relationship.
Give coworkers advice about things you’re an expert on. Don’t beat them over the head with it—just share tidbits of information in conversations, and invite them to drop by your workspace if they show interest in learning more.


Promote Yourself to a Leadership Position

There’s no need to ask for permission to become a leader. The best way to become known as a leader is to just start acting like one.

Remember that cause you support? Organize a volunteer day for your office, explaining to your boss how this will build team spirit.
Volunteer to lead meetings.
Spearhead an exciting project, delegate responsibilities to team members, and give them positive feedback to coach them along.

If you take these steps, you’re sure to stand out at work. How you approach success makes a difference—you won’t be passively waiting for it, but actively reaching for it. That will mark you as a leader in the eyes of your boss and other decision-makers. In turn, this will boost your job security and lead to exciting opportunities for promotion.

Joel can help you boost your visibility among leaders and coworkers. If you want advance in your career, gain the deserved promotion or receive more work recognition, hire Joel for executive coaching.

Self-Defeating Behavior

“Those who say life is knocking them down and giving them a tough time are usually the first to beat themselves up. Be on your own side.”

~Rasheed Ogunlaru~

As Jeremy prepared to give performance reviews for his employees, he was struck by this realization: Most of their shortcomings had nothing at all to do with ability. Rather, they were engaging in various forms of self-sabotage. They were all bright enough and quite talented—often they astounded him with their insights—but they were tripping themselves up with self-defeating behavior.

Self-defeating behavior holds all of us back at some point. For some, it can sabotage promotions or careers. To overcome your self-defeating behavior, or to help your employees overcome theirs, first pinpoint what’s going on. These are some of the most common forms of self-sabotage—chances are, you’ve engaged in many of these at one time or another.

Dominating Conversations

You might think everyone’s listening raptly to your boundless ideas. Think again. If you’re talking over others and constantly directing the conversation, you’re not acting as either a good leader or team member.
Avoiding Risks

Many of us engage in catastrophic thinking about potential risks (and failure often isn’t as scary as we think). Steering clear of risks means you’ll never achieve sweeping successes. If you lack trust in your own judgement about what risks are worthwhile, bring your ideas to your supervisor or mentor before you dive in head-on.
Procrastinating

Most of us have procrastinated at some point. If you’re dreading a particular task, find ways to make it more manageable. If it’s complicated, make an outline showing how you’ll tackle it. If it’s tedious, decide to spend a fixed amount of time on it each day, and then move on.
Shying Away from Difficult Conversations

Difficult conversations don’t get easier if you put them off—in fact, the reverse is true. Try to look at them as an opportunity for growth. Go into them with a sense of empathy for the other person, truly trying to understand her perspective. You might be surprised at what you both learn. If you want to learn more, read Practical Tactics for Crucial Communication.
Having Tunnel Vision

Having tunnel vision is a common form of self-sabotage, say Phillip J. Decker and Jordan Paul Mitchell in Self-Handicapping Leadership. This means focusing so narrowly on one task or role that you can’t see the big picture. Think of the angry boss who is so preoccupied with finishing a task that he yells at everyone who approaches him. He doesn’t see that his attitude toward others has a lasting effect on relationships and workplace culture.
Taking Work Home

If you’re taking work home, you’re decreasing your mental clarity at work. You might think that the more time you put into work, the more you’ll get done. Wrong. There’s a point at which you need to recharge—give yourself that time.
Not Delegating Enough

Needing to do or control everything yourself wastes your time and tells people you don’t trust them. Micromanaging is one form of not delegating enough—because if you’re watching someone under a microscope, you haven’t truly delegated the work.
Failing to Ask for Feedback

Fear of feedback keeps people from growing. You might be afraid to hear others’ opinions about you, or you might fear being seen as someone who needs advice. However, everyone needs advice—even executives! Whatever your shortcomings are, remember that in a few short months you could be well on your way to overcoming them—if you ask for feedback.

These three steps will help you banish self-defeating behavior:

Identify your triggers. Know when the behavior arises, so you can consciously nip it in the bud.
Create systems of support. Figure out who you can turn to for advice or affirmation, and tell them what you’re working on overcoming.
Determine steps you can take to set a new pattern. Envision the behavior you want to engage in. Write notes for yourself as reminders.

Beware of one pitfall: Coping with one self-defeating behavior by replacing it with another, say Phillip and Mitchell. This tendency is all too common, they warn, giving the example of someone who avoids getting angry by steering clear of conflict. Asking for feedback from someone you trust can help make sure you’re truly addressing the behavior.

Jeremy helped his employees to grasp how they were getting in their own way. Together, they discussed steps to take in order to break out of these harmful patterns. For instance, the employee who was taking work home all the time decided to set more realistic deadlines. The employee who never took risks decided to run creative ideas by her team to see if they gained buy-in. Most importantly, by showing them that they aren’t the only ones who engage in self-defeating behavior, Jeremy helped foster a culture where employees can talk about these issues. As a result, they had a stronger system of support for overcoming them.

As an executive coach, Joel constantly is supporting his clients overcome self-defeating behaviors that are holding back their career.

Is your Salary Negotiable?

“The best move you can make in negotiation is to think of an incentive the other person hasn’t even thought of – and then meet it.”

~Eli Broad~

Nora received a job offer for the position of her dreams. She was ecstatic. She wasn’t even focused on the salary. Fortunately, she shared the news with one of her mentors, who had also been her very first boss. “Don’t accept without a negotiation,” her mentor advised her. He shared these statistics about salary from a recent Glassdoor survey:

Three of five employees do not negotiate their salary.
Women are less likely than men to negotiate—68% of women vs. 52% of men abstain from negotiating. This is a shame, because salary is almost always negotiable.
When men negotiate their salary, they’re over three times more likely than women to succeed. This may stem in part from confidence—men tend to have an easier time asking for what they want—though that’s not to dismiss the impact of sexism. However, it’s getting better: The gender gap is much lower for younger workers than for older ones.
Older workers as a whole are also less likely to negotiate salary. As younger employees set the pace for negotiations, the older generations would be well advised to keep up—with their experience, they’re likely settling for less than they could have.

Here are 4 steps to succeeding in your next salary negotiation so you can Get Paid What You’re Worth.

Build Up Your Confidence

Having confidence is crucial to salary negotiation. Knowing the interviewer expects you to negotiate should give you a confidence boost. Remember that the raises you get down the road will depend on your starting salary.Mentally prepare your spiel about your track record of success. Get ready to cite the specific results of projects you handled in your current or previous role. If you’re asking for a raise from your current boss, prepare to discuss your successes as thoroughly as you would for an interview. Rehearse with a friend to make your answers as eloquent as possible.
Do Your Research

Whether accepting a new position or asking your current boss for a raise, find out the typical salary range for your position in your geographical area. Remember, this could have changed in recent years. When you’re knowledgeable about salary ranges, you’ll feel much more confident making an offer. Consider the current state of the industry, too. Was it struggling when you accepted your position, but now flourishing? That gives you plenty of room to negotiate.
Hold Off on a Number

Try not to be the first to put forth a number, says Michael Zwell in Six Figure Salary Negotiation. If asked about your expectations, try to give a less specific answer, such as “My expectations are in line with my experience and abilities,” he adds.If forced to give an answer, factor all the benefits you would like into the number, says Roger Dawson in Secrets of Power Salary Negotiation. Such benefits may include potential work bonuses, health insurance, retirement plan, vacations, and tuition reimbursement.

If you’re switching careers, request the chance to renegotiate after six months, says Zwell. This gives you a window of time to prove yourself in the new role, and then to request more than you could have initially.
Use Leverage

If you’re applying for a new position, indicate that you’re considering another offer, says Dawson. At the same time, signal some degree of flexibility about salary. Highball your target salary, but say something like, “I might be able to take a little less,” he suggests. Know the company is almost certainly lowballing you if they make an offer—they expect you to make a higher counteroffer.

As Zwell says, if you’re negotiating with a current employer, you won’t be terminated for aiming much too high, whereas with a prospective employer, it’s possible you could lose the opportunity. However, aiming much too high with your current employer could signal that you’re unhappy with your position, he asserts.

If you’re offered a promotion within your company, remember that salary is negotiable here as well. Bring up the salary question with your potential new boss, not your current one, says Zwell. If made an offer, don’t be afraid to make a counteroffer. Consider what they’d have to pay a new hire, as well as the value added from your familiarity with the company.

Most importantly, have patience. The salary negotiation process can take a little time, and not settling on an offer too soon can benefit you over your entire career.

Negotiate in person if at all possible, says Dawson. It shows you’re serious and gives you a chance to respond to questions as they arise. Ask the company to put your agreement in writing, he adds. This eliminates any misunderstanding, especially when factoring in the benefit and compensation packages. Remember, the company is typically as eager as you to reach a mutually agreeable salary and move on!

If you want to get paid what you’re worth, utilize Joel’s Salary Negotiation Coaching.

6 Tips for New Managers

“Corporate culture matters. How management chooses to treat its people impacts everything—for better or for worse.”

~Simon Sinek~

Client Julie says: I’ve just accepted a job as manager of my department. I want to successfully navigate this new leadership role. What mistakes should I make sure to avoid?

Coach Joel answers: Becoming a manager probably marks a dramatic shift from your previous role. It may feel overwhelming. You’re being asked to apply a new skill set, and everyone is gaging your ability to handle the role. But avoid these 6 classic mistakes, and you’ll be on your way to becoming a great boss.

Ignoring the Big Picture

New managers might be tempted to dive into the daily grind before fully educating themselves on organizational vision, mission, and strategy. To guide and inspire their team, however, they need a strong grasp of these concepts. Thus, they should meet with leaders of the organization early on to get briefed on strategy and understand their perspective on these issues. Creating an action plan is important when starting a new role.
Presuming They Know Their Employees

You might have worked alongside your direct reports for years, but you don’t know them as their manager. Taking time for one-on-ones with each of them is vital to understanding their work performance goals, concerns, and job roles. Communicating that you want their ideas about how your department can improve will also convey that you value them.
Micromanaging Employees

Because your success depends on theirs, you might be tempted to micromanage the nitty gritty details of your direct reports’ days. Here’s an important tip for every new manager: Relinquish total control. Trying to maintain that level of control signifies mistrust, which is especially harmful to a new manager who might be supervising former coworkers. (They’d be sure to see you as too big for your britches!) After you delegate tasks, let employees handle them.
Assuming Executive Presence Develops Naturally

Executive presence doesn’t just develop on its own—at least, not for most people. New managers should consciously work to cultivate charisma (because yes, that’s something you can develop). They should also practice regulating their emotions, keeping a couple of stress-reducing exercises in their pocket for critical moments. New managers must show they’re calm and in control in order for others to trust and take them seriously.
Choosing a Leadership Style That Doesn’t Feel Right

You might gravitate toward a leadership style that your previous boss used. However, if it’s not the best fit for your personality, it will probably feel awkward or ineffective. Read up on leadership styles—such as visionary, democratic, and affiliative leadership—to determine which style or combination is right for you. Then, find a mentor who models that style.
Brushing Off Awkward Feelings

If you sense any tension from direct reports who used to be your coworkers, don’t ignore it. That will only cause it to fester. Bring it up during your one-on-one meetings, talking about how you can reduce the awkwardness together. Even if you don’t sense hostility or hurt feelings, acknowledging the shift fosters openness that will help you navigate any awkwardness that arises.

If you’re a new manager, you’re sure to make mistakes. After all, you are a rookie, and everyone starts somewhere. For all new managers, tips and advice from a trusted mentor are priceless. Have regular one-on-ones with your mentor to talk through the inevitable questions and hurdles that arise.

Help the newly promoted succeed with an Executive Coaching Program by Joel Garfinkle.

Unplug from Technology!

“Turn off your email; turn off your phone; disconnect from the Internet; figure out a way to set limits so you can concentrate when you need to, and disengage when you need to. Technology is a good servant but a bad master.”

~Gretchen Rubin~

Vincent found himself obsessively scanning email when he was trying to focus on other tasks. Incoming communications were dominating his focus. Then he picked up a book on time management and realized how much time he was wasting.

Being constantly responsive to others’ questions is a huge energy drain, the author said. Most of us don’t truly multitask well, so if you’re constantly connected, you’re disrupting the task you were trying to focus on.

If, like Vincent, you’re staying too connected, consider these tips for unplugging from technology after work or even during the workday.

Understand Why It’s So Tough

To benefit from time away from tech, you need to understand why it can be hard to unplug. Sometimes we put much more weight on others’ needs than on our own. If we know an email is sitting there waiting to be addressed, we feel guilty, even if we’re doing something important.We may also get FOMO—fear of missing out. We might want to think of ourselves as superstars, being the ones to jump in and solve problems as they arise. However, the urge to save the day for others can keep them from solving problems themselves. The world can get along without you for a while—and it might be better off for it.
Taking Breaks During the Workday

Try taking mini breaks from technology during work. Leave your email behind when you go to lunch, or handle only personal communications on your breaks—nothing work-related. Better yet, read a book and ignore all electronic communication during that time.
Mentally Unplug

Unplug from certain types of communication during times you’ve committed to a particular task. Maybe you can’t leave behind technology, but unplugging mentally from email and your phone while researching an idea or writing a proposal will improve your focus. Finishing that project you’ve been wanting to dive into? Set aside an hour or two of text-free, voicemail-free, email-free time while you work. It’s too easy to get distracted by someone’s “urgent” question, or to forget to answer it later if you’ve already opened the email. If you simply don’t check email for an hour while finishing your project, you’ll be able to address it with a clear mind after that.
Set Rules for Using Tech at Work and Home

At work, set designated times for checking email and responding to voicemails. This will help you stay disciplined, making you more productive.When you leave the office, set aside all work-related communications until the next day. Period. Don’t open an email with the intent just to read it, not to respond. That will only cloud your mind with questions to stew over. You’ll come to work with renewed clarity and motivation if you allow yourself to have true downtime.
Take a Tech Detox

If you have trouble not looking at work emails while at home, it might be time for a tech detox. If you can, take a “tech fast” for a day or two over the weekend, fully unplugging from all technology. Ignore all texts, unless a real emergency pops up, and don’t even think about looking at email. Spend time with your family and friends, or on your hobbies.Check out mentally from any work-related issues. There’s no sense in mulling over a problem when you’ll come in with better ideas on Monday if you simply let your worries go. Listen to “How to Unplug at Work and Be on Vacation?” This 8-minute podcast interview was with Montreal, Canada’s #1 News Talk Radio Station.

Using these tips, Vincent was able to better structure his workday and accomplish what he set out to achieve. Once he started resisting the urge to check email every ten minutes, the urge became less powerful. At home, he enjoyed a richer family life and caught up on more reading. Best of all, his mind felt clearer, and he felt a renewed sense of purpose both at work and at home.

As an executive coach, Joel can help you unplug from technology so you actually boost your productivity and gain work-life balance.