JoAnna Lynn Oblander's Blog, page 82

Not The House (and what comes with it) But The Home

[image error]I am just months away from being an empty nester – one of those women who carry photos of her children and grandchildren to bore others with because she is no longer overwhelmed with noisy, energetic (and sometimes cranky) children underfoot.

I cannot claim to be new to the experience of being an empty nester – mainly because I believe that every time a child leaves home an empty nester experience occurs. Yet, all of those empty nester experiences and observations of my children as adults have taught me some invaluable lessons:

•    Cherish all of the teaching moments with your children – especially the ones that come at inconvenient times. And…make an effort to create as many of them as you can.

•    In order for our teaching moments to be effective they must be backed up with our example.

•    Take time to have fun as a family…and do it often. Laughter and giggles are important!

•    Teach children responsibility and how to work (even when it’s easier to do it yourself).

•    Teach children right from wrong, morality, the Golden Rule and the Ten Commandments. They do not automatically absorb it.

•    Dance lessons, music lessons and sports are all wonderful and have their place but they need to have their place and not rule schedules or a family. All too often families lose the connections they should have with each other because they are spending every spare moment effort funding the lessons, traveling to practices/games, and living life on the go.

•    A parent needs to be a parent and not relegate authority over the home to the children. The angriest and most emotionally unhealthy children I have ever seen are from families where those children were allowed control of their families.

•    Daily expressions of love are invaluable to building relationships and a loving family.

•    Skip the expensive toys and electronics and encourage children to play and use their imaginations. (The best toy in the world is an appliance box!)

•    A large fancy house does not have an increased ability to make a happy family.  Many shacks have been better homes to children than mansions have.

•    Children do not learn to be successful by being coddled and indulged. They learn to be successful by learning self discipline and how to work.

•    The most important things parents can do to provide security for their children is to make their marriage a priority. Date nights are important and the courtship that initiated the family should never…ever end.

•    Don’t wait to do things with your children until your children are older. It may seem like lots of activities would be easier if you just wait until they are older but the most critical time to build relationships with them is when they are young (and those activities take the most effort).

•    A house does not make a home.

•    Building a home is not done with walls, mortar or nails. A home is built by two parents who love each other – who are committed to each other and the work and effort it takes to build a family.  A home is built with hugs, teaching, tears, a few scraped knees, kissing boo boos better, discipline, work, trips for ice cream, chores, water fights, attending church together, family dinners and more. And somehow…even when we are so exhausted that lifting a finger seems a monumental task – we must do it all with love.

Building a home out of a house is tough demanding job. The hours are grueling and there is no monetary compensation. However, “the toughest job in the world” has amazing rewards. I feel and experience those rewards every time I walk through the door of my house and sense all of the laughter, love, and memories that have been created and shared there, spend time with my sweetheart (who is still my sweetheart because we have made each other a priority), share in the successes of my children, and gather together with my loving, energetic, and sometimes mischievous family!

Share this:

Please Be Sure to Follow My Blog Tour! Keep an Eye on my Calendar for the Links!

Share this:

What Shaving My Legs has to do with Living a Great Life! A Glimpse of Heaven

It is summer time and its shorts season and that means I have to shave my legs more frequently (unless I want to gross out a lot of people). I have this habit of looking for the symbolism in the ordinary events of life. Believe it or not – I believe that there is some profound symbolism to be learned from shaving my legs!

The other day, I was sitting at the lake with my family and I looked down to see a tiny little forest of hair on one of my legs right behind my ankle bone. I was so grateful that only family was around and horrified by what I was seeing! My little forest was not just a few nubs of hair – every hair in the grouping was at least ¼ inch long (long by leg shaving standards!). It was obvious that although I shaved my legs almost every day that I was consistently missing that certain area of my leg.

Now the reason for this story is not to horrify you with what you might be picturing in your mind (of my leg) but to explain the symbolism I see in this event. In analyzing how my forest of hair came to be – it is obvious that way too often I shave my legs on autopilot. In other words, I shave the same places in the same order without really looking at the “Big Picture” or taking the time to really see what I am doing.

I think life is too often lived on autopilot too. But life is too precious to be lived on autopilot. If we don’t make the effort to really see what is going on around us and to recognize our blessings we miss out on sooo much!

Let me share an example with you. Not long ago I was at a water complex with all of my grandchildren and their mothers. It was a fun for me just sitting on the side of a pool and talking to my daughters and daughter-in-laws. Then it occurred to me that I was missing some great photo opportunities and I took my camera and went searching for my grandchildren.

It was not long before I came across one of my four year old granddaughters. She was in a part of the complex called the river all by herself. She had a life jacket on so she was not in any danger but she was surrounded on all sides by large numbers of people who were much bigger than she was and I could see in her face that she was feeling really overwhelmed.

I called out to her and she reached out to me. She quickly asked me if I would stay with her. I did stay with her and what a learning experience that was for me. Her little four year old self wanted to be both independent and to have safety and security. She would hold onto me for several minutes and then she would let go when she started feeling secure. That process repeated itself many times over and it was such a teaching experience for me. I already knew her well enough to know that she had a strong desire to exert her independence but I learned how important it is to her for me to be a support to her – even when she is trying to “do it myself”. My time with her in the river became a really special bonding time. She may be only 4 but eventually she will be 14 and when she is, I believe my influence with her will be much greater because of the time that I am spending with her now.

Had I continued on “autopilot” at the water complex, I would have still had a great time with my family members but I would have missed out on a really precious moment in my life.

Who would have thought shaving my legs could teach me so much! …What a reminder for me to be on the lookout for more precious opportunities and to be more aware of what is going on around me!

Share this:

Law of the Harvest – Glimpse of Heaven

© Fredvl | Stock Free Images & Dreamstime Stock Photos

I find it interesting that so many of us have lost sight of the Law of the Harvest.  There is such beauty in the Law of the Harvest. For me, the Law of the Harvest is all about individuality and blossoming into who we are meant to be.

Today’s technological world has easily convinced too many that all things should come in an instant: wealth, happiness, fame, education, skills, etc.  This world was not created in an instant and nothing of true value and worth ever is.

Life is about growth and improvement. No one ever created a good habit in an instant and nobody has ever created a life of integrity and character in an instant.  A truly meaningful life is not even built from a handful of momentous occasions – it is built from a timely process of experiences and choices that build in positive ways.

In order to grow and improve, we must follow nature’s sequence:

Planting
Cultivating/Nurturing
Harvest

Throughout our lives that natural process is meant to occur over and over again. For each of us, the variety of seeds that are planted will be a combination that is uniquely our own. No seed that is planted should be discounted – each seed is important for it is creating the harvest that is meant to be us.

The planting is crucial and the harvest is meant to be glorious but the most important part is the cultivating and nurturing.  There is no end result worth mentioning without the cultivating and nurturing. The strength and beauty of the harvest comes only when the seed is planted, given the appropriate amount of time, fed the right nutrients, and has enough sunshine.

When a human spirit comes to earth, it needs the same kinds of things that a plant does to have a glorious end result. We need to be planted where we can grow (which is not always where we imagine would be best), receive plenty of the right foods and water, have lots of nurturing and tender care and we need lots and lots of “Son” shine.

I am not who I am as a result of one major life event. I am more who I am because of the seemingly insignificant events that play out in my life daily. Each one of those events and choices that occur in my life build who I currently am and who I will become. The same holds true for everyone.

As for myself, I like to think of myself more like a tomato plant. I do best when I am surrounded by a sturdy cage (my family, friends, and access to and sources of eternal truth). The fruits that my life has produced and will continue to produce are of varying sizes and will ripen at various times but regardless of the size and harvest time – the quality of every piece of fruit depends on the consistent nurture and care given to the entire plant.

Every piece of fruit the plant produces not only has value of its own – its contributes to the value of the entire plant. And…each one is has its own unique time to be ready for harvesting.

When we try to rush our children through childhood; demand more of ourselves than we are currently prepared to give and/or expect instant results without the appropriate effort and/or time involved – we are forgetting the law of the harvest. All of God’s creations are meant to be a part of the Law of the Harvest. Who we are meant to be will not be created overnight and will be most successful when given the appropriate time and care. I am grateful that that law honors who we are and who we are meant to become and creates those glorious results we want like nothing else can!

 

 

 

Share this:

Happy Birthday America! A Glimpse of Heaven

I am soooo grateful for being a citizen of the United States of America! I am grateful for the freedoms that we enjoy as citizens of this country. What a blessing it is to be a citizen of a nation that has used its powers to bring freedom and greater security to the citizens of other nations rather than use its powers to dominate and rule over other them!

I am grateful that the Founding Fathers of this nation were men who:

Believed in God
Believed in God’s power
Believed that freedom was a God-given right
Risked their lives and their fortunes in order that this nation might be free.

It was not an accident that their motto was “In God We Trust”. The founding of this country is a testament to what can and will be done when God’s children trust in Him and act upon His inspiration. This nation will always be a great and strong nation as long as the majority of its citizens look to God for their strength and guidance.

I will always remember how grateful I was to land on U.S. soil after flying home from Russia while the Kosovo conflict was raging. Never before had I realized how wonderful it is to be a citizen of this country! Freedom – wherever it is found is a blessing and should never be taken for granted!

I cannot express enough thanks to all who have sacrificed their time, being with their families and loved ones, their comfort and their lives that the freedom of this nation might be preserved and the world in which we live in might be filled with more free and less filled with tyranny!

I hope that all of us will remember how blessed we are and never take our freedom for granted. I also hope that during this election year that we will look to elect men and women who believe in God and who look to Him for strength and guidance in their lives. Happy Birthday America!

Share this:

The Refiner’s Fire – Great Story! A Glimpse of Heaven

I wanted to share this story that I came across at                                    http://lds.about.com/library/week/aa1....                                                            It is a great story with a great message and reminds us that as our refiner – Heavenly Father is always watching over us! Enjoy! JoAnna Oblander

[image error]The following story is a great example of how the Lord teaches and molds us through life’s trials.

There was a group of women in a Bible study on the book of Malachi. As they were studying chapter three, they came across verse three which says: “He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver.” (Malachi 3:3) This verse puzzled the women and they wondered what this statement meant about the character and nature of God.

One of the women offered to find out about the process of refining silver and get back to the group at their next Bible study. That week this woman called up a silver smith and made an appointment to watch him at work. She didn’t mention anything about the reason for her interest in silver beyond her curiosity about the process of refining silver. As she watched the silver smith, he held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat up. He explained that in refining silver, one needed to hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest as to burn away all the impurities. The woman thought about God holding us in such a hot spot–then she thought again about the verse, that he sits as a refiner and purifier of silver.

She asked the silver smith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time the silver was being refined. The man answered that yes, he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire. If the silver was left even a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed. The woman was silent for a moment. Then she asked the silver smith, “How do you know when the silver is fully refined?”

He smiled at her and answered, “Oh, that’s easy–when I see my image in it.”

If today you are feeling the heat of the fire, remember that God has His eye on you.

Author unknown

Share this:

God Has Confidence in You…You Need to Too! A Glimpse of Heaven

[image error]I’m not that special. I’m not like her (him). I wasn’t in the right line when they handed out that talent…the list goes on and I know I’m not the only one who has heard these types of remarks. Maybe it’s you that has been saying them…to your friends, your family, and worst of all…to yourself.

Life is full of oops and falling short but that doesn’t mean that we don’t measure up or that we shouldn’t believe in ourselves.

Do we want our children (grandchildren) to believe in their selves the same way we believe in ourselves? Do we want them to use the same “measuring stick” that we use? Whose measuring stick are we using anyway?

When I think of all the things that I learned from my visit to heaven – I think the most important thing I learned may have been how different we are “measured” in heaven compared to earth. In heaven there is such a nurturing and honoring of individuality – and I’m not just talking personality here. Each individual is truly PRIZED for their unique strengths and qualities – would you expect anything different from Heavenly Father or a place in which His perfect love presides?

Yet, here on earth, we so easily buy into the falsehood that we should be like someone else or the most perfect person we know – which, of course, is a major falsehood all of its own.

We should listen to our hearts – our hearts know so well who and what we truly are and who we are meant to be. That doesn’t mean that being our self is always easy or without its challenges… but then isn’t that what we came to earth for? We are absolutely meant to grow and to be challenged and to make mistakes and repent and to keep trying and to do our best to become the best that we are capable of becoming. We are to believe in ourselves and work at developing the talents that we have been blessed with. If I am meant to develop my talent of holding a baby…that in no way diminishes another’s duty to develop their talent of sharing their amazing smile. You don’t think those are talents? I guarantee you they are!!! It is those talents that the “world” overlooks that are generally the most important of all!

Now granted…I don’t remember professional athletes or super models in heaven…but I can assure you that the most prized talents were not athleticism or physical beauty. The most prized talents were the ability to love and spiritual strength. Interestingly enough – those talents are talents which both here and there (in heaven) have to be sought after and developed – they do not just happen.

I can also assure you that Heavenly Father believes in Himself and He believes in us – not in our already present perfection but in our ability to get there. If we are meant to become like Heavenly Father (perfect) and He loves and believes in His self – wouldn’t it stand to reason that we should love and believe in our self? Can you even imagine a perfect, loving Heavenly Father sending you to earth so that He could enjoy the sadistic pleasure of watching you fail? (Pleeease tell me you can’t imagine that.) I can tell you that no one has more confidence in our individual ability to succeed. Heavenly Father has done all that He can do to set us up for success, the rest is up to us (but He still there to help). It may seem trite but developing our relationship with Heavenly Father through personal prayer, scripture study, obedience to the commandments and living the Golden Rule is huge to our ultimate success – and we will be successful if we have faith in God, live right and have faith in ourselves.

I’m not talking about the kind of success that says we will own a yacht, or travel the world, or be world famous. I am talking about the kind of success that truly matters – the kind of success that guarantees that the world will have been a better place for our having been here – the eternal kind of success.

So if you are struggling to believe in yourself…get down on your knees tonight and ask God if you have reason to believe in yourself – to believe in your potential and in your ability to live a life of purpose. Ask if you matter to Him. If you stay on your knees long enough to actually give Heavenly Father the opportunity to answer – I believe the answer will bring tears of joy to your eyes. Heavenly Father believes in your potential – when you come to believe in and accept that same potential – you will have your own Glimpse of Heaven! So…even if no one else is around to give you a hug – give yourself a hug and know that you are special and that you have potential you have never even dreamed of!

Share this:

My Grandmother’s Example – A Glimpse of Heaven

[image error]I learned the importance of example through my grandmother.  My grandmother didn’t just tell me what she believed – she lived it. Her guidance came backed with the stamp of her example.

I never remember having any conversations about the do’s and don’ts of life with my grandma.  No deep discussions…our interactions were more filled with working together (if you call making cookies and eating strawberries out of her garden work) and play time.

My sweet grandma was shaped like an inverted hour glass with not a lot of distance between her shoes and her head. She made her own butter from the fresh milk grandpa supplied from his cows, canned the proceeds from her large garden, baked her own bread, and my grandpa drove her everywhere because she didn’t drive.

I was only 5 or 6 years old when grandma’s dad passed away. Though I wasn’t very old, I understood the devastation my great grandfather’s death left for my grandma as her mother lost her will to live and the roles of mother and child were reversed.

Watching my grandmother deal with her mother after the loss of my great grandfather created some concerns for me. For years, I worried how my grandma would cope if she ever lost my grandpa. My grandpa and grandpa were true sweethearts and it was easy to imagine my grandma coping with losing my grandpa just the way her own mom had.

I always wondered why my grandma made sure that she attended the funeral of every family and community member in her small community. My grandma was not a stranger to death. She lost 3 children before they reached the age of 2. It took me several years to realize her attendance at so many funerals was not a result of pre-occupation with death but a desire, on her part, to be of comfort to those she knew and loved.

After we lost grandpa – grandma showed me what she was really made of. One of the first things she did was take driving lessons and, from what I understand, grandma’s biggest driving challenge was seeing over the dashboard – no problem with the other essential driving skills! In those months after grandpa died, grandma pulled herself up by her bootstraps and she forged ahead. She had always taught me about eternal families and the way she moved ahead with her life let me know that although she greatly missed her sweetheart – she knew that their parting was temporary and that she needed to step up and take care of business in his absence.

It was less than a year after my grandpa died that grandma had her first stroke. Once again, she showed the mettle she was made of. Instead of giving up, she was fully cooperative with her rehabilitation therapy. Her doctors predicted a full recovery.

The last time I saw my grandma I had one of those rare moments where the exchange we had did not need words but only holding hands. As I looked into her eyes, I knew that she was telling me good-bye. The way that she squeezed my hand, looked into my eyes and smiled at me communicated to my spirit that she knew her time had come and that I needed to know that she would be okay. Grandma had a massive stroke within a few days of my last visit.

I never recognized the example my grandma set for me until she was gone.  In fact, some of the most memorable examples she set for were in the last few months of her life.

At her funeral, it was noted that her last and final church calling (job) had been working with the infants and toddlers in her ward nursery. She served as nursery leader in her ward until she had her stroke. She never complained or said she was too old – she simply embraced and loved the little children that she worked with.

My grandma did not have a lot of material wealth. I still chuckle when I think about the colored tricot underwear my brother and boy cousins received one year for Christmas (well before colored underwear for boys was considered fashionable)! As the grandmother of 30+ grandchildren and 6 living children – my grandmother spent endless hours making gifts for her family. She worked hard to make her gift-giving budget stretch – she worked even harder to show her love through her hand-made gifts.

My grandma was not a perfect woman but she knew that how she lived mattered. She had mortal flaws like anyone but she consistently made an effort to be the kind of person she believed God wanted her to be. Her example taught me that when life hands me difficulties – it’s okay not to have a perfect understanding of how to handle those trials as long as I am trying to do my best and I am utilizing the correct source of help (God). She provided me with an example of can do not give up. She showed me that giving of self is more important than giving of things. She believed in eternal families and when loved ones were lost – she did not question those beliefs she simply confirmed them by her actions. And possibly the greatest example my grandma set for me was in showing me that it is through the small acts, the little courtesies, and the insignificant events that never make news headlines that this world is made a better place and I am made a better person. What a blessing to recognize that by coming to understand what my grandmother has taught me through her example – I have been granted another “Glimpse of Heaven”!

Share this:

The Truth About Adoption

[image error]Happily Ever After…it has a nice ring to it but it’s not about reality.  Yet, happily ever after is what many adoptive families envision of their futures once they bring their child or children home. The adoptive families I am talking about here are not the domestic adoptive families who are bringing home newborns (though I’m sure they want happily ever after too!). I am talking about the families who through domestic or foreign adoption seek out and bring into their loving homes those children who, in their brief lifetimes, have experienced rejection, abandonment, abuse and/or loss. The children I speak of are often at least the age of 2 when they are adopted. My own children were 4 and 9 when we brought them home.

If anyone wants to adopt with the idea of being celebrated as a hero or being nominated for sainthood – I strongly recommend they immediately go to the nearest pet shelter and adopt a dog or cat and abandon the idea of adopting a child altogether. A dog will think you are the best thing to happen since the invention of steak. A cat may think you are nice to snuggle with but I can almost guarantee that it will be a different story with a child.

I think in this instance, it may be wise to fess up to the fact that there has been a time in my own life when blissful delirium prevailed in regards to adoption rather than sober understanding. I was the epitome of the new expectant mother who had not yet been tempered by labor pains, sleepless nights and messy diapers.

If you have read my book, you know that my husband and I adopted two children from Russia as a result of my being commanded by God. As the mother of 4 healthy and active biological children I may be a somewhat atypical adoptive mom in that had I not experienced “divine intervention” I am almost certain that I would never have pursued adoption. However, once my orders from God were in place, I became just like the giddy effervescent new can’t-wait-to-be-a-mom mom.

My (then uneducated) rational told me that any orphaned child that came from a disadvantaged background where poverty, neglect, abandonment and abuse were once experienced would welcome the opportunity to seek refuge in a loving safe home.  I looked forward to welcoming my new children into our home and providing them with an environment they could thrive in. Given their experiences, I honestly believed that my adoptive children would be able to appreciate the blessings of a loving family in a country of great opportunity in a way that my biological children would be incapable of.

Fast forward through 6 1/2 years of searching for my children, the adoption paperwork, the trip to Russia, our return home and our first year of playing charades with our children (charades is necessary when you speak different languages) and then you get to the reality. Though our adopted children gasped as they got their first glimpse of a Walmart store, their enthusiasm for embracing their new family was less gratifying. They resented parental direction, seemed unable to grasp moral lessons, and essentially seemed to care for little else than the food they ate and being warm. Over time, we came to understand that their deliberate attempts to keep their new family at a distance stemmed from the emotional disorder called Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). The reality is that most of the adopted children who come from eastern European countries (including Russia) and Haiti have RAD. (I am not familiar with the RAD statistics for other countries) Children with RAD are resentful of parents (mothers in particular) and feel they are fully capable of self-parenting. They commonly lie, steal, manipulate, triangulate, make false allegations and warmly embrace self-defeating behaviors in order to feel that at all times and in all situations they are in control.

The abnormal behaviors associated with RAD generally result when infants and toddlers are not given the care and protection they need during those first critical months of life when children generally first learn to trust and to attach to their caregivers (usually moms). As a result, brain development is impaired and they learn to primarily use a fight or flight response to everything they deal with in life. As healthy parents, we care that they learn to love and trust and develop. As children with RAD, they care that they survive, that no one can hurt them again, and that no one has power over them. Conscience has little to no effect on these children and so the lengths that they are willing to go to in order to keep their hearts isolated and protected are truly heart breaking. They will deliberately try to prove that they are unlovable and unstoppable.

When I first learned about RAD, I was so sure that my love and the love of my family could help my adopted children overcome any and all of their problems. However, I truly should have known better. In my book, A Glimpse of Heaven, I refer to my experience of being taken back to heaven and seeing the preparations being made to prepare each of us for life on earth. During that experience, I witnessed that some of God’s spirit children rejected Him. I can tell you that there is not a more loving being than our Heavenly Father and there is not a more loving atmosphere than heaven and yet love did not overcome God’s rejection there and it is not enough to cure children of RAD here. Children with RAD have to want to overcome their emotional issues. Then and only then can love be a powerful tool to help them.

I felt that I needed to write about the truth of adoption because of several conversations that I have had with family and others who have adopted children with RAD. The overwhelming consensus from those conversations is that adoption is good and necessary and yet too many individuals are stepping into the experience with their eyes closed tight and equipped with little to no real life understanding of what they are accepting to be a part of.

I happen to live within a about a mile of two other families besides my own who have adopted children with RAD (All of us ignorant of RAD at the time we adopted and the ramifications of what that meant). In each family, biological children were also a part of the family.

Not coincidentally, each family has:

•    Experienced significant behavioral problems with their adopted children

•    Gone to great lengths to help their adopted children (counseling, etc).

•    Have had their adopted children make false allegations.

•    Experienced rejection and have been ostracized by extended family and friends who have believed the false allegations made by adopted children.

•    Been accused by friends and family of being abusive, mean and inept parents.

•    Been victims of theft, lies, and triangulation

•    Been victims of heartbreak as they have experienced the rejection and abuse from the very children they have loved and have endeavored to help.

In one of those families, 8 adoptive children were welcomed into their home. In the other family, 4 children were welcomed into their home. In each of those cases, a significant financial burden was incurred. I personally know no one who would take on that kind of financial and parenting burden (even under the best of circumstances) for any other reason than a generous loving heart and a desire to help a child. Yet, too many too often have been willing to condemn them and judge them.

In hindsight, each of our families wish that we would have known and understood the significant emotional issues that our adopted children came equipped with. I, for one, would have still adopted my children but my handling of them in those crucial first years would have been dramatically different. I cannot know if the outcomes would have been different but I certainly feel that I would have been more prepared.

After all that my family and I have been through as a result of our adoption, I am still a believer in adoption and I believe that all children deserve a loving, safe home. I know that the reality is that too many children know hunger, cold, abandonment, abuse and an environment too void of nurturing. However, I also know that those who bring those children into their homes who have started life in less than stellar circumstances need to do so with an understanding of the skills they will need and task they are undertaking. And…they need to know that while love will be critical and essential…it will not be enough to remove the barricades from the hearts of their children.

Parenting of any child is a demanding and difficult endeavor. Under the best of circumstances, parenting is not and never has been for the faint of heart. However, as a parent of 4 biological children and 2 adopted children, I can verify that although the love and concern for each child will be the same and each child comes with their own unique challenges no matter how they become part of a family – the courage and mettle required to parent a child with RAD requires the best heart and soul a person can offer.

Share this:

The Counters

[image error]As the littlest angel watched over earth, she was amazed at how busy everyone was.

“I wonder what keeps them so busy”, she thought to herself.

Then the head angel came to her and said, “It’s your turn to go to earth”

The littlest angel jumped with joy as she was given the date that she would arrive.

She was so excited that she started counting the days until her arrival.

Later, the head angel checked in on her to see how arrangements were going.

She proudly told him she was counting the days.

“Counting the days?” He asked. “Are you sure that is wise?”

“It must be” She remarked. “I have been watching earth and I have noticed that everyone does it.”

“I see,” said the head angel. “Perhaps we need to take a closer look at things.”

So the littlest angel and the head angel made a trip to earth.

First the head angel pointed out some little boys counting marbles.

One little boy remarked that he was surely the best marble player in all the world – after all he had just won 121 marbles and had not lost a single one.

The littlest angel was very impressed because she could not yet count that high.

Then the head angel showed the littlest angel the same little boy as a young man.

He no longer played marbles. Instead, he was counting his money.

“I am amazing,” he said to himself. “Look at all the money I make. Surely the world will soon take note of me and see how important I am because of all the money I make.”

Next, the head angel showed the littlest angel a young woman.

She was counting how many boys had asked her out on a date.

“Surely I am important because of my beauty,” she said to herself “Look at how many boys want to date me”

On they moved on to some brothers and sisters who belonged to the same family.

One of the girls was heard saying “I have had it. Billy always gets what he wants. I always have to wash the dishes and all he has to do is dust. I counted it up just the other day. Billy has gotten to dust the last three times. I have had to wash dishes five times in a row.”

Then, they moved from the family to a man saying his prayers.

“Please God” he asked “I have worked for the company for 25 years. Bob Johnson has worked for the company only 21 years. Surely I deserve the promotion more than he does.”

On they moved to a young married couple who were having an argument.

“I don’t see what the big deal is,” said the young man. “I spend over forty hours a week at work earning money to pay the bills. Why do you have to make such a big deal of it if I forget my socks on the floor once or twice?”

“Once or twice?” Screamed the young woman. “I’ll have you know that I have picked up your socks from off of the floor at least ten times in the last two weeks. That’s 10 times in 14 days. Once or twice is a forgivable offense. 10 times in 14 days means you think that I am your personal slave.”

The littlest angel turned to the head angel “Am I going to have to learn to count like this? She asked.

The head angel said “That will be up to you”

“But I don’t understand” said the littlest angel. “Counting seems to be such an important part of earth life.”

“Counting cannot be all that bad” she said. “Even Heavenly Father counts”

He told me that he knows how many hairs are on the head of each of his children. He knows when a bird loses a feather. I know that He even knows exactly how many children He has.

“Seems like some pretty impressive counting to me,” Said the littlest angel.

“Impressive it is” said the head angel. “Let’s look in on another home.”

They observed the mother of several small children for several days.

“Wow” said the littlest angel “I have been counting and that mother has a lot of things to keep track of. I could barely keep up myself with how many times she changed diapers, fed her children, washed loads of laundry and washed up scraped knees. How does she keep track of all of the counting?’

“She doesn’t” said the head angel.

“Why not?” asked the littlest angel

“She does what she does out of love” said the head angel

“That doesn’t make sense” said the littlest angel “How is she going to know if she is the most important, the most beautiful, the richest, the hardest worker, or even the most powerful?

“She won’t” said the head angel “But it won’t matter to her. She will feel rewarded if her children grow up to be kind, loving adults like she is.”

“Are you kidding me?” asked the littlest angel

“No” said the head angel

“Let’s move on to one more life,” said the head angel

The next life that they saw was that of the Savior.

“Look,” said the littlest angel “He just fed five thousand”

“See, even he counted” said the littlest angel

“He only counted the fish and loaves of bread that he had to divide,” said the head angel. His helpers counted how many were fed.

The littlest angel noted as she observed the life of the Savior how many times he forgave others, how many times he fed others, how many times he taught people to think of their fellow man instead of themselves.

Then she and the head angel watched as the Savior achieved his crowning act in mortality – his death and resurrection.

The littlest angel watched in humble adoration.

She knew that what the Savior had done he had done for every single one of Heavenly Father’s children.

“Oh head angel,” she said, “I think I get it”

“What do you get?” asked the head angel

“The Savior is our example and he is not a counter is he?” said the littlest angel

“No he is not,” Said the head angel

“He wants us to do everything that we do because of love – not because of the reward that we might receive. Kind of like that mom that we watched. She didn’t care how many times she had to do things for her family. She didn’t care because she loved them so much.” Gushed the littlest angel

“So if I am going to be like my Savior, I need to work real hard at not counting.” said the littlest angel.

“That’s right,” said the head angel

“We better return to heaven – I think you will be leaving for your turn on earth very soon” said the head angel.

“That’s okay,” said the littlest angel “but I am not counting the days any more – just let me know when it is my time to go.”

By JoAnna Oblander – Author of A Glimpse of Heaven

 

Share this: