S.M.R. Burton's Blog, page 2

A Sliver of Peace

Is it built brick by brick in the distortion of my mind? Layered with indifference, marked by impulse, and sealed with love. A misinterpreted affection. A heart full of compassion but blackened at the core. Summoned to dig sharpened teeth into the hearts of man leaving nothing for the vultures but trails of blood.

 

Succumb to the universe’s delicate design. Grip tight the tarnished, double edged sword with overeager confidence. Warm crimson drips from impatient fingers to paint the ground. Crue...

Feeding The Mania

***Disclaimer I am not a professional, this is simply a reflection on my own personal experience and this is also not categorizing all individuals diagnosed with Bipolar disorder.

I dance under the lights of the stage, the music washes over me. I feel the words like the gentle caress of a lovers fingertips. The notes touch me in an intimate way. My body moves involuntarily, fluid and practiced movements. Arms up, my hands swirl through the lyrics I see dancing on air. I feel all eyes on me, and...

Motherhood

***Potential Trigger Warning: This post discusses personal struggles I have faced as a mother. Although the content is not what may typically fall under triggering material, I wanted to advise everyone before reading that this isn’t categorizing all Bipolar mother’s and if you have struggled with infertility this may not be the blog post for you. Please remember to be kind, as it took extreme amounts of vulnerability to even share.***

This piece isn’t a creatively constructed view of my mental ...

The Masks of My Mind

Fake. Failure. Fraud.

Absorbed in the reflections of light cast from the drops of rain running along the window pane. So minute and fleeting. Similar to me. In this moment. In this life. Grasp at nothing, because no one is there. It’s only me bound in this prison of my minds own design, seeking out answers, longing for freedom and begging for time.

Which one is real? I often wonder the same.

The version that the world is most likely to see. A perfectly painted smile, laughter flows as easy ...

Waking Up In Fear

***TRIGGER WARNING: This post contains potentially sensitive material in regards to a toxic relationship and sexual assult. Please read with caution.***

I laid there motionless and focused on the tears that rolled from vacant eyes, creating little streams that ran into my hair. I embraced that tiny bit of madness that came from wanting to wipe them away but forcing myself to allow them to slowly flow because it was better than the alternative.

It was better than accepting where I was and wha...

Walking The Tightrope

Laying in bed long before my alarm is set to ring I follow the lines on the picture frame. It’s silent in my home and yet I find myself overstimulated. I can hear the tiny crinkle of my head sinking further into my pillow. I hear my lashes crunch against the fabric when I close and reopen them time and again pleading for sleep to carry me away from where my mind is about to go.

The Silence is too loud. It will send me right over the edge. I become distracted and anxious. Quite lost in this vo...