Mark R. Hunter's Blog, page 28
December 30, 2020
New Year's Writin' Eve
I wondered about the best way to start the New Year. I rarely drink--and if I didn't start drinking in 2020, I never will. I have no desire to see Miley Cyrus' Epiglottis on New Years Rockin' Eve (or whoever the most recent too young to be showing so much skin singer is).
What I do want in 2021 is to get published again.
So I plan to start the New Year with new rounds of submissions to publishers, magazines, and literary agents. I have short stories already out, but novel manuscripts that need to go out, including Fire on Mist Creek, Beowulf: In Harm's Way, and Summer Jobs Are Murder. Another three manuscripts are mostly done, but need some work yet: Smoke Showing, The Source Emerald, and We Love Trouble.
By the end of January I mean to have all my completed but unpublished manuscripts out and about, and seeing more of the world than I. Meanwhile, since both COVID and winter are likely to stick around for some time, I'll stay home and work on getting the rest nicely polished and pretty-looking.
I know what you're thinking: "You lazy sod, why won't you have all that done three minutes into the New Year"? Well, my paranoia has me pouring over query letters and synopsis' for hours before I upload manuscripts and hit the send button. Besides, a little celebration is in order--and I have a morbid fascination with seeing how incapable the folks in Times Square are of finding and using a trash can.
Okay, the truth is I have to work New Year's Eve. The other truth? After 2020, we shouldn't make plans: You never know what's going to fall on us in the New Year.
------------------------------------------
Remember, every time you don't read a book and leave a review, a wicked witch terrorizes Munchkins. Save the short people.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
What I do want in 2021 is to get published again.
So I plan to start the New Year with new rounds of submissions to publishers, magazines, and literary agents. I have short stories already out, but novel manuscripts that need to go out, including Fire on Mist Creek, Beowulf: In Harm's Way, and Summer Jobs Are Murder. Another three manuscripts are mostly done, but need some work yet: Smoke Showing, The Source Emerald, and We Love Trouble.
By the end of January I mean to have all my completed but unpublished manuscripts out and about, and seeing more of the world than I. Meanwhile, since both COVID and winter are likely to stick around for some time, I'll stay home and work on getting the rest nicely polished and pretty-looking.
I know what you're thinking: "You lazy sod, why won't you have all that done three minutes into the New Year"? Well, my paranoia has me pouring over query letters and synopsis' for hours before I upload manuscripts and hit the send button. Besides, a little celebration is in order--and I have a morbid fascination with seeing how incapable the folks in Times Square are of finding and using a trash can.
Okay, the truth is I have to work New Year's Eve. The other truth? After 2020, we shouldn't make plans: You never know what's going to fall on us in the New Year.
------------------------------------------
Remember, every time you don't read a book and leave a review, a wicked witch terrorizes Munchkins. Save the short people.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
December 27, 2020
Have a look at The Source Emerald
Second draft of the new novel-in-progress: done. New working title: The Source Emerald.
The rough draft weighed in at 67,515 words. Even after cutting some of the final chapter, the second draft finished at 70,294 words. A lot of those extra 2,779 words consisted of me saying, "Huh? What did I mean by that?" and then going in to make it clearer. The whole thing is better now.
I think.
And how does one celebrate the completion of a second draft?
Why, by starting the third draft, of course.
A lot of this starts with a giant emerald. Although I can't put photos here, you can see an example of the Bahia Emerald in my blog.
The Bahia Emerald of Brazil is believed to be the largest single shard ever found. It weighed about 752 pounds, and has been valued at about $400,000,000.
It was necessary to shrink the emerald in my book down to thirty-two pounds, but it was once much larger, and still resembles this one. And that, Mr. NSA guy, is why I've been researching gems so much lately.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
The rough draft weighed in at 67,515 words. Even after cutting some of the final chapter, the second draft finished at 70,294 words. A lot of those extra 2,779 words consisted of me saying, "Huh? What did I mean by that?" and then going in to make it clearer. The whole thing is better now.
I think.
And how does one celebrate the completion of a second draft?
Why, by starting the third draft, of course.
A lot of this starts with a giant emerald. Although I can't put photos here, you can see an example of the Bahia Emerald in my blog.
The Bahia Emerald of Brazil is believed to be the largest single shard ever found. It weighed about 752 pounds, and has been valued at about $400,000,000.
It was necessary to shrink the emerald in my book down to thirty-two pounds, but it was once much larger, and still resembles this one. And that, Mr. NSA guy, is why I've been researching gems so much lately.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
December 24, 2020
Yes, Virginia, there's still a Santa Claus
Her name was Virginia O’Hanlon. She graduated from Hunter College (gotta love that name) with a Bachelor of Arts degree, and a year later received her Master’s from Columbia. In 1912 she began teaching for the New York City school system, and 47 years later, after reaching the position of principal, she retired. It was a full and good life, one in which she had an impact on many children.
But throughout her life, until she died in 1971, she received letters, questions and interviews about something she, herself, did as a child -- something that has become immortal.
She wrote a letter.
“Quite naturally I believed in Santa Claus,” Virginia said years later, “for he had never disappointed me. But when less fortunate little boys and girls said there wasn’t any Santa Claus, I was filled with doubts. I asked my father, and he was a little evasive on the subject.”
All we fathers have been there.
“It was a habit in our family,” Virginia continued, “that whenever any doubts came up as to how to pronounce a word, or some question of historical fact was in doubt, we wrote the Question and Answer column in The Sun. Father would always say, ‘If you see it in the Sun, it’s so’, and that settled the matter.”
This was in 1897. Anyone who said “If you see it in the newspaper, it’s so” these days would be laughed right out of the room, but we were a more faithful society then. So, Virginia wrote this letter:
“I am 8 years old. Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus. Papa says, ‘if you see it in The Sun, it’s so.’ Please tell me the truth, is there a Santa Claus?”
Virginia O’Hanlon
Those of you who no longer trust the newspapers would not be surprised if an editor quickly jotted down “Of course there is!” to satisfy the youngster, and leave it at that. But the letter found its way to Editor Francis P. Church, the son of a Baptist minister, who had two decades experience in the newspaper business.
Church was habitually given the controversial subjects to editorialize on, especially those involving religion. His motto was, “Clear your mind of can’t”. In other words, don’t try -- do. He felt he had to find an answer, and he had to answer truthfully. But if he said no, he would devastate the 8 year olds of New York City. If he said yes, how could he face his church, and all those adult readers who believed in his honesty?
It must have been terribly difficult, but he sat down to work on what would become the most famous editorial in history. It was reprinted annually, until the newspaper went out of business in 1949, and has become legend since.
In a probably misguided attempt to make Church’s reply clear to modern children, I’m going to try to update the editorial in today’s much poorer English. It’s probably a huge mistake, and I’m quite sure I’m not going to do justice to it. But the 8 year old Virginia’s of today are growing up too fast, and those of us with young hearts also need to remember Church’s conclusion:
Virginia, your little friends are wrong. They live at a time when they think no one believes in anything, and they believe only what they see. They think nothing is real if they can’t picture it in their little minds.
But all minds are little, Virginia, whether they belong to adults or children. In this huge universe man is very small, and his mind can’t truly understand all the things that are real and true in it.
Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus.
He’s real, as real as love, and kindness, and the spirit of giving, and all those things that bring beauty and joy to the world. How terrible this world would be without Santa Claus! It would be as dull and sad as if there were no Virginia's. There would be no childlike faith then, no imagination, no love that makes this life worth living. We would be unable to enjoy anything we couldn’t see or touch. There would be no childhood -- and the light of childhood fills the world.
Not believe in Santa Claus! Why, you might as well not believe in angels. You could get your father to hire people to watch all the chimneys on Christmas Eve, but even if none of them saw Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus then, but that doesn’t mean he’s not real. The most real things in the world are the things children and adults can’t see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that’s not proof they aren’t there. No one can imagine all the wonderful things that nobody can see in the world.
You can tear apart a toy to see what makes it work inside, but there’s a covering over those unseen things that not even the strongest man, not even all the strongest men together, could ever tear apart. Only faith, and imagination, and love, can push aside that covering and show all the wonderful things that are there. Are they all real? Oh, Virginia, in all this world there is nothing else as real and long lasting.
No Santa Claus? Thank God he lives, and lives forever. A thousand years from now -- a million years from now -- he will still be real, and make glad the hearts of every Virginia, and everyone who stays young at heart.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
But throughout her life, until she died in 1971, she received letters, questions and interviews about something she, herself, did as a child -- something that has become immortal.
She wrote a letter.
“Quite naturally I believed in Santa Claus,” Virginia said years later, “for he had never disappointed me. But when less fortunate little boys and girls said there wasn’t any Santa Claus, I was filled with doubts. I asked my father, and he was a little evasive on the subject.”
All we fathers have been there.
“It was a habit in our family,” Virginia continued, “that whenever any doubts came up as to how to pronounce a word, or some question of historical fact was in doubt, we wrote the Question and Answer column in The Sun. Father would always say, ‘If you see it in the Sun, it’s so’, and that settled the matter.”
This was in 1897. Anyone who said “If you see it in the newspaper, it’s so” these days would be laughed right out of the room, but we were a more faithful society then. So, Virginia wrote this letter:
“I am 8 years old. Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus. Papa says, ‘if you see it in The Sun, it’s so.’ Please tell me the truth, is there a Santa Claus?”
Virginia O’Hanlon
Those of you who no longer trust the newspapers would not be surprised if an editor quickly jotted down “Of course there is!” to satisfy the youngster, and leave it at that. But the letter found its way to Editor Francis P. Church, the son of a Baptist minister, who had two decades experience in the newspaper business.
Church was habitually given the controversial subjects to editorialize on, especially those involving religion. His motto was, “Clear your mind of can’t”. In other words, don’t try -- do. He felt he had to find an answer, and he had to answer truthfully. But if he said no, he would devastate the 8 year olds of New York City. If he said yes, how could he face his church, and all those adult readers who believed in his honesty?
It must have been terribly difficult, but he sat down to work on what would become the most famous editorial in history. It was reprinted annually, until the newspaper went out of business in 1949, and has become legend since.
In a probably misguided attempt to make Church’s reply clear to modern children, I’m going to try to update the editorial in today’s much poorer English. It’s probably a huge mistake, and I’m quite sure I’m not going to do justice to it. But the 8 year old Virginia’s of today are growing up too fast, and those of us with young hearts also need to remember Church’s conclusion:
Virginia, your little friends are wrong. They live at a time when they think no one believes in anything, and they believe only what they see. They think nothing is real if they can’t picture it in their little minds.
But all minds are little, Virginia, whether they belong to adults or children. In this huge universe man is very small, and his mind can’t truly understand all the things that are real and true in it.
Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus.
He’s real, as real as love, and kindness, and the spirit of giving, and all those things that bring beauty and joy to the world. How terrible this world would be without Santa Claus! It would be as dull and sad as if there were no Virginia's. There would be no childlike faith then, no imagination, no love that makes this life worth living. We would be unable to enjoy anything we couldn’t see or touch. There would be no childhood -- and the light of childhood fills the world.
Not believe in Santa Claus! Why, you might as well not believe in angels. You could get your father to hire people to watch all the chimneys on Christmas Eve, but even if none of them saw Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus then, but that doesn’t mean he’s not real. The most real things in the world are the things children and adults can’t see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that’s not proof they aren’t there. No one can imagine all the wonderful things that nobody can see in the world.
You can tear apart a toy to see what makes it work inside, but there’s a covering over those unseen things that not even the strongest man, not even all the strongest men together, could ever tear apart. Only faith, and imagination, and love, can push aside that covering and show all the wonderful things that are there. Are they all real? Oh, Virginia, in all this world there is nothing else as real and long lasting.
No Santa Claus? Thank God he lives, and lives forever. A thousand years from now -- a million years from now -- he will still be real, and make glad the hearts of every Virginia, and everyone who stays young at heart.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
December 17, 2020
Tis the 911 Season
I don't know if anyone who's not in the emergency services will fully appreciate this, but what the heck. I wrote some new lyrics to the Christmas song "Deck the Halls", and it's dedicated to all the emergency telecommunicators out there--including those who, like me, still call themselves 911 dispatchers.
I just hit my 29th anniversary on the job, so don't mess with me: I'm legally insane:
TIS THE 911 SEASON
Tis the season for the fighting,
Fa la la la la, la la la
Kicking, screaming and the biting
Fa la la la la, la la la
Barroom fights and family squabbles
Fa la la la la, la la la
Louder than a turkey gobbles
Fa la la la la, la la la
Frequent flier, 911
Fa la la la la, la la la
Claiming that his meds are gone
Fa la la la la, la la la
Overdose is never fun
Fa la la la la, la la la
Especially at half past one
Fa la la la la, la la la
Traffic stop, to be proactive
Fa la la la la, la la la
Sure enough a warrant active
Fa la la la la, la la la
It won't get that cop promoted
Fa la la la la, la la la
When they find out he has COVID
Fa la la la la, la la la
Working all night, on through Christmas
Fa la la la la, la la la
Sure do hope the family missed us
Fa la la la la, la la la
We won't join in with the choir
Fa la la la la, la la la
Unless they catch their tree on fire
Fa la la la la, la la la
When we get home and we're tired
Fa la la la la, la la la
Can't sleep because we're still wired
Fa la la la la, la la la
Family members give you some cheer
Fa la la la la, la la la
Save your stress until the New Year
Fa la la la la, la la laaaaaa........
-----------------------------------------
Remember, every time you don't buy a book, the Grinch steals a tree.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
I just hit my 29th anniversary on the job, so don't mess with me: I'm legally insane:
TIS THE 911 SEASON
Tis the season for the fighting,
Fa la la la la, la la la
Kicking, screaming and the biting
Fa la la la la, la la la
Barroom fights and family squabbles
Fa la la la la, la la la
Louder than a turkey gobbles
Fa la la la la, la la la
Frequent flier, 911
Fa la la la la, la la la
Claiming that his meds are gone
Fa la la la la, la la la
Overdose is never fun
Fa la la la la, la la la
Especially at half past one
Fa la la la la, la la la
Traffic stop, to be proactive
Fa la la la la, la la la
Sure enough a warrant active
Fa la la la la, la la la
It won't get that cop promoted
Fa la la la la, la la la
When they find out he has COVID
Fa la la la la, la la la
Working all night, on through Christmas
Fa la la la la, la la la
Sure do hope the family missed us
Fa la la la la, la la la
We won't join in with the choir
Fa la la la la, la la la
Unless they catch their tree on fire
Fa la la la la, la la la
When we get home and we're tired
Fa la la la la, la la la
Can't sleep because we're still wired
Fa la la la la, la la la
Family members give you some cheer
Fa la la la la, la la la
Save your stress until the New Year
Fa la la la la, la la laaaaaa........
-----------------------------------------
Remember, every time you don't buy a book, the Grinch steals a tree.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
December 13, 2020
My Labyrinthitis is acting up ... apparently
I sat in shock as the doctor, his face somber, informed me that I had Acute Eustachian Salpingitis.
Worse, it was accompanied by Labyrinthitis.
You can imagine my reaction. Why me? Why now? What is it?
Okay, the now was because I'd just started vacation. I have a lot of sick days saved up, because I only get sick when I was already scheduled off, anyway. That's Hunter's Law of Vacations #2. (#1 is: If you plan a vacation outdoors, the weather will be terrible. It's a bit more obvious than rule #2.)
In a quavering voice, I asked, "Am I gonna die, Doc?"
"Yes, he said. Yes, you will. I'd give you maybe twenty to thirty years if you take care of yourself, and maybe late 2022 if you keep going the way you have been."
Wait. three words I can't pronounce, and it's not fatal?
This is how Dr. Google defines it: lymphoid hyperplasia in or about the eustachian tube. You'd take that seriously too, wouldn't you? I didn't start making out a will right away, but only because I've always known my wife would outlive me, so she gets the house anyway. And there's nothing she can do about it.
"I want you," the Doctor intoned, "to perform the Valsalva Maneuver several times a day."
"Whoa! That's kinda personal, Doc--and I'm getting older. I'm not sure I could manage that more than twice a week."
After translating all that Latin into Lower Middle Class American, I discovered a sinus infection had spread into my ear.
Yeah. I had to cancel the fund raiser, the film crew stalked away in disgust, and all those people who spent the day wearing chartreuse in my honor were really upset.
A few years ago I had sinus surgery. It reduced my sinus infections from two or three a year, to one every year and a half or so ... but the ones I do get seem to be worse. This time around I decided to treat it myself; it's not as though I didn't know what was happening.
As you know, there are two kinds of men: The ones who retreat to their death beds at every sniffle, and the ones who cut off an arm, tie it off with a belt, and go back to work. I lean a little more toward that last kind, especially since my belt is old and needs replaced, anyway. So I didn't go to the doctor until my balance was so affected I had to walk sideways to go anywhere at all. The room wasn't spinning, exactly ... it was doing more of a roller coaster thing.
And that worked out just fine, because my plan had been to stay inside and edit my new novel manuscript, anyway. Other than those times when I felt too bad even to do that, the week went pretty much the way I expected it to, not including the awful neti pot. Where did that idea come from, anyway? North Korean torture chambers?
Oh, and the Valsalva Maneuver? You just pinch off your nose, blow in a little pressure, then swallow. Easy ... although if it was a cooking recipe, that would have been one too many steps for me.
So the good news: I didn't end up in the hospital as so many have this year, and I got to experience being drunk without actually drinking.
Remember, every time you don't buy a book, a reality TV show is born. Save our brains.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
Worse, it was accompanied by Labyrinthitis.
You can imagine my reaction. Why me? Why now? What is it?
Okay, the now was because I'd just started vacation. I have a lot of sick days saved up, because I only get sick when I was already scheduled off, anyway. That's Hunter's Law of Vacations #2. (#1 is: If you plan a vacation outdoors, the weather will be terrible. It's a bit more obvious than rule #2.)
In a quavering voice, I asked, "Am I gonna die, Doc?"
"Yes, he said. Yes, you will. I'd give you maybe twenty to thirty years if you take care of yourself, and maybe late 2022 if you keep going the way you have been."
Wait. three words I can't pronounce, and it's not fatal?
This is how Dr. Google defines it: lymphoid hyperplasia in or about the eustachian tube. You'd take that seriously too, wouldn't you? I didn't start making out a will right away, but only because I've always known my wife would outlive me, so she gets the house anyway. And there's nothing she can do about it.
"I want you," the Doctor intoned, "to perform the Valsalva Maneuver several times a day."
"Whoa! That's kinda personal, Doc--and I'm getting older. I'm not sure I could manage that more than twice a week."
After translating all that Latin into Lower Middle Class American, I discovered a sinus infection had spread into my ear.
Yeah. I had to cancel the fund raiser, the film crew stalked away in disgust, and all those people who spent the day wearing chartreuse in my honor were really upset.
A few years ago I had sinus surgery. It reduced my sinus infections from two or three a year, to one every year and a half or so ... but the ones I do get seem to be worse. This time around I decided to treat it myself; it's not as though I didn't know what was happening.
As you know, there are two kinds of men: The ones who retreat to their death beds at every sniffle, and the ones who cut off an arm, tie it off with a belt, and go back to work. I lean a little more toward that last kind, especially since my belt is old and needs replaced, anyway. So I didn't go to the doctor until my balance was so affected I had to walk sideways to go anywhere at all. The room wasn't spinning, exactly ... it was doing more of a roller coaster thing.
And that worked out just fine, because my plan had been to stay inside and edit my new novel manuscript, anyway. Other than those times when I felt too bad even to do that, the week went pretty much the way I expected it to, not including the awful neti pot. Where did that idea come from, anyway? North Korean torture chambers?
Oh, and the Valsalva Maneuver? You just pinch off your nose, blow in a little pressure, then swallow. Easy ... although if it was a cooking recipe, that would have been one too many steps for me.
So the good news: I didn't end up in the hospital as so many have this year, and I got to experience being drunk without actually drinking.
Remember, every time you don't buy a book, a reality TV show is born. Save our brains.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
December 11, 2020
More Slightly Off the Mark is out in print ... still
Well, this is embarrassing: I'd meant to post this before the blog I put up on the same subject back on 12/2. It's been sitting in my draft folder ever since More Slightly Off the Mark was originally released earlier this year; from a promotion standpoint, the book seems to have been cursed.
But I'm still putting this out here, for three reasons: First, it's already written. Second, hey--still Christmas shopping season, and I always hope to be shopped. Third, social media doesn't seem to want other people to see what you're doing these days, so there's every chance you might not have read the previous post, anyway.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
You probably already guessed this from my previous post. Still, now that we finally have the print version of our newest book, More Slightly Off the Mark: Why I Hate Cats, and Other Lies, available to buy, I can finally announce:
The print version of our newest book, More Slightly Off the Mark: Why I Hate Cats, and Other Lies, is available to buy!
Guess I should have led with that. Oh, wait ... I did.
It was what we call a slow rollout, which is another way of saying I wasn't as prepared as I thought I was, and I didn't take into consideration that great leveler of plans, Winter. This winter leveled a lot of us. (So did spring and summer, as it turns out.)
But now it's out, and only $7.50 for the paperback version, despite the fact that it's actually longer than the original Slightly Off the Mark. Or maybe because--all those words can be intimidating. Now, according to my calculations, you can have it for only 33 cents a page.
I might be wrong on that: I became a writer to avoid math.
Meanwhile, we've reduced the Kindle price of More Slightly Off the Mark to just $1.99, for those of you who have an e-reader, or a computer, and/or are just plain cheap. Remember, that's less than it costs to buy one of those super sized candy bars--and books have no cholesterol, yet still provide plenty of fiber.
And to further celebrate, we dropped the price of the original Slightly Off the Mark: The Unpublished Columns to 99 cents, which is what they charge if you want a plastic straw at Starbucks. It's true, I saw it the internet.
It's available on the website:
http://markrhunter.com/
Plus you can read the preview and get it any time on Amazon:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/170...
Remember, every time you don't buy a book, a reality TV show is born. Save our brains.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
But I'm still putting this out here, for three reasons: First, it's already written. Second, hey--still Christmas shopping season, and I always hope to be shopped. Third, social media doesn't seem to want other people to see what you're doing these days, so there's every chance you might not have read the previous post, anyway.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
You probably already guessed this from my previous post. Still, now that we finally have the print version of our newest book, More Slightly Off the Mark: Why I Hate Cats, and Other Lies, available to buy, I can finally announce:
The print version of our newest book, More Slightly Off the Mark: Why I Hate Cats, and Other Lies, is available to buy!
Guess I should have led with that. Oh, wait ... I did.
It was what we call a slow rollout, which is another way of saying I wasn't as prepared as I thought I was, and I didn't take into consideration that great leveler of plans, Winter. This winter leveled a lot of us. (So did spring and summer, as it turns out.)
But now it's out, and only $7.50 for the paperback version, despite the fact that it's actually longer than the original Slightly Off the Mark. Or maybe because--all those words can be intimidating. Now, according to my calculations, you can have it for only 33 cents a page.
I might be wrong on that: I became a writer to avoid math.
Meanwhile, we've reduced the Kindle price of More Slightly Off the Mark to just $1.99, for those of you who have an e-reader, or a computer, and/or are just plain cheap. Remember, that's less than it costs to buy one of those super sized candy bars--and books have no cholesterol, yet still provide plenty of fiber.
And to further celebrate, we dropped the price of the original Slightly Off the Mark: The Unpublished Columns to 99 cents, which is what they charge if you want a plastic straw at Starbucks. It's true, I saw it the internet.
It's available on the website:
http://markrhunter.com/
Plus you can read the preview and get it any time on Amazon:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/170...
Remember, every time you don't buy a book, a reality TV show is born. Save our brains.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
December 8, 2020
More Slightly Off the Mark
A lot of writers want to know what a good sales pitch looks like. I would, too ... but here's mine:
---------------------------------------------------------
Is the turn of the last century already ancient history?
In More Slightly Off the Mark: Why I Hate Cats, and Other Lies, Mark R. Hunter collects his 2000-2001 humor pieces—the earliest he put on a computer. In Dos … on a floppy disk.
The change in just twenty years resulted in a complete rewrite, so Hunter inserts his present self into the work—mostly to make fun of his older stuff. Along the way he riffs on everything from history to health, vacations, holidays, and, of course, technology. Weather also, naturally—because everyone talks about that.
Just $1.99 on Kindle—free on Kindle Unlimited—and is also available in print for $7.50. Find it on Amazon:
https://www.amazon.com/More-Slightly-...
Or on the author's website:
http://www.markrhunter.com/
Remember to support authors—the original self-isolation workers.
---------------------------------------------------------
Is the turn of the last century already ancient history?
In More Slightly Off the Mark: Why I Hate Cats, and Other Lies, Mark R. Hunter collects his 2000-2001 humor pieces—the earliest he put on a computer. In Dos … on a floppy disk.
The change in just twenty years resulted in a complete rewrite, so Hunter inserts his present self into the work—mostly to make fun of his older stuff. Along the way he riffs on everything from history to health, vacations, holidays, and, of course, technology. Weather also, naturally—because everyone talks about that.
Just $1.99 on Kindle—free on Kindle Unlimited—and is also available in print for $7.50. Find it on Amazon:
https://www.amazon.com/More-Slightly-...
Or on the author's website:
http://www.markrhunter.com/
Remember to support authors—the original self-isolation workers.
December 2, 2020
Remember that book we released in February? We just released it.
I know all of you have thought to yourself, "What makes for a good advertisement? How do those people get me to buy their stuff?"
I dunno.
But I did write my own ad for our most recent published book, and sent it out into the cold, cruel world, where for all I know it's being read by someone in a secret bunker in North Korea even as we speak. It was an interesting challenge, because I put it up on a book site that wanted me to write something about a third of the length this originally was.
I'm putting it here to show people an example of selling the soap, to ask what others think about it, and to ask if the expression is still "selling the soap". I've never sold soap. Despite that, I occasionally get up on my soapbox.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Is the turn of the last century already ancient history?
In More Slightly Off the Mark: Why I Hate Cats, and Other Lies, Mark R. Hunter collects his 2000-2001 humor pieces—the earliest he put on a computer. In DOS … on a floppy disk.
The change in just twenty years resulted in a complete rewrite, so Hunter inserts his present self into the work—mostly to make fun of his older stuff. Along the way he riffs on everything from history to health, vacations, holidays, and, of course, technology. Weather also, naturally—because everyone talks about that.
It's just $1.99 on Kindle—free on Kindle Unlimited—and is also available in print for $7.50. Find it on Amazon:
https://www.amazon.com/More-Slightly-...
Or on the author's website:
http://www.markrhunter.com/
Remember to support authors—the original self-isolation workers.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
I dunno.
But I did write my own ad for our most recent published book, and sent it out into the cold, cruel world, where for all I know it's being read by someone in a secret bunker in North Korea even as we speak. It was an interesting challenge, because I put it up on a book site that wanted me to write something about a third of the length this originally was.
I'm putting it here to show people an example of selling the soap, to ask what others think about it, and to ask if the expression is still "selling the soap". I've never sold soap. Despite that, I occasionally get up on my soapbox.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Is the turn of the last century already ancient history?
In More Slightly Off the Mark: Why I Hate Cats, and Other Lies, Mark R. Hunter collects his 2000-2001 humor pieces—the earliest he put on a computer. In DOS … on a floppy disk.
The change in just twenty years resulted in a complete rewrite, so Hunter inserts his present self into the work—mostly to make fun of his older stuff. Along the way he riffs on everything from history to health, vacations, holidays, and, of course, technology. Weather also, naturally—because everyone talks about that.
It's just $1.99 on Kindle—free on Kindle Unlimited—and is also available in print for $7.50. Find it on Amazon:
https://www.amazon.com/More-Slightly-...
Or on the author's website:
http://www.markrhunter.com/
Remember to support authors—the original self-isolation workers.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
November 27, 2020
NaNoWriMo won, rough draft finished!
It turns out I can not only write 50,000 words in thirty days, I can write them in 20 days!
(Technically 22, because I didn't update my count as fast as I wrote, but what the heck.)
I even did a little editing as I went, because I do that. Participants in National Novel Writing Month are encouraged not to go back for anything: Just write straight through, get that first draft out! Worry about revising later. It's good advice, really. But my habit is, at the beginning of each writing session, to go back over the writing I did the day before. It puts me back in the zone, and I do a little cleanup along the way.
It must work for me, because the entire rough draft of my Oz novel is finished! 67,515 words in 26 days. It's nowhere near a record: I know one writer who hit 80,000 words in the first twenty days. It's possible they write full time, or were on COVID lockdown, or something similar. As for me, I had some time off to take in November, which certainly did help me along.
In the end it's not really about hitting a certain word count: It's to get that novel going, glue yourself to the keyboard and keep at it, although if you glued yourself to the keyboard you'd have to type the same letters over and over, so never mind.
In other words, if you're participating this year and have fallen behind, as many have, never mind. Just go on past November 30. Keep plugging away at it, and get that novel done.
And how am I going to celebrate? Easy:
Revision. Then editing. Then polishing. then submitting. That's how the game goes, and you only lose if you give up.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
(Technically 22, because I didn't update my count as fast as I wrote, but what the heck.)
I even did a little editing as I went, because I do that. Participants in National Novel Writing Month are encouraged not to go back for anything: Just write straight through, get that first draft out! Worry about revising later. It's good advice, really. But my habit is, at the beginning of each writing session, to go back over the writing I did the day before. It puts me back in the zone, and I do a little cleanup along the way.
It must work for me, because the entire rough draft of my Oz novel is finished! 67,515 words in 26 days. It's nowhere near a record: I know one writer who hit 80,000 words in the first twenty days. It's possible they write full time, or were on COVID lockdown, or something similar. As for me, I had some time off to take in November, which certainly did help me along.
In the end it's not really about hitting a certain word count: It's to get that novel going, glue yourself to the keyboard and keep at it, although if you glued yourself to the keyboard you'd have to type the same letters over and over, so never mind.
In other words, if you're participating this year and have fallen behind, as many have, never mind. Just go on past November 30. Keep plugging away at it, and get that novel done.
And how am I going to celebrate? Easy:
Revision. Then editing. Then polishing. then submitting. That's how the game goes, and you only lose if you give up.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
November 24, 2020
book review: The Annotated Wizard of Oz (centennial edition)
You want a great book to give this holiday season?
Okay, yeah, my books, but this one isn't about self-promotion. I'm talking about a book Emily got me, one of my favorite gifts: The Annotated Wizard of Oz.
For those of you who think the whole thing began at MGM in 1939, "centennial edition" means it came out in 2000--exactly one hundred years after "The Wonderful Wizard of Oz" was originally published. There were actually two other "Wizard of Oz" movies before Judy Garland danced down the Yellow Brick Road.
Naturally the story is by L. Frank Baum, who in his relatively short life wrote 14 novels about Oz, in addition to 41 other novels, 83 short stories, over 200 poems, and at least 42 stage and movie scripts. Most of this was in a period of about twenty years.
But much of the writing in this volume is by Michael Patrick Hearn, who did a deep dive into Baum's life and works. Hearn has earned his bona fides, and is an expert on both Baum and children's literature in general--he's written other annotations, and I can't imagine how much time it takes to track down so much information.
We know the story, of course, and it's printed here along with the original illustrations, in their original color. Little Dorothy (she doesn't get a last name until a later book) gets swept up in a tornado to the magical Land of Oz, where she gets a little help from her friends in reaching the Emerald City. The Great and Powerful Oz (who for some reason needs a kid to do his job) sends her to Winkie country, where--spoiler alert!--she takes out the witch, returns to the Emerald City, exposes Oz as a humbug, and loses out on her chance to get back to Kansas.
Dorothy and her friends then embark on an entirely different journey, absent from the MGM movie, to reach Glinda the Good and discover she would have saved a lot of walking if those darn silver (!) slippers had only come with an instruction manual.
https://www.amazon.com/Annotated-Wiza...
Hearn covers a lot about the book, including how it does and doesn't relate to real world happenings, and about Baum himself--both the good and the bad. He also touches on the other Oz books and Baum's entire volume of work, how his childhood led up to Baum's writing career, and his travels with his family. (It turns out "Kansas" was mostly based on a drought-stricken South Dakota.)
Of particular interest is the Baum family relocation to the little, orange-grove dominated village of Hollywood, where Baum became an early leader of the burgeoning film industry. Like most businesses he got involved with, the Oz Film Manufacturing Company had a rocky life.
"The Annotated Wizard of Oz" would be worth the cost just for the illustrations, from both the book itself and other works by Baum and his co-creators. As for me, I'm in the middle of writing a novel in which Lyman Frank Baum has a part, and the background info was not only fascinating, but helped me get inside his head in ways just reading the stories couldn't. If you're a fan of Oz or literature, this book would be of interest. If you're not a fan of Oz, I'm puzzled but I forgive you.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
Okay, yeah, my books, but this one isn't about self-promotion. I'm talking about a book Emily got me, one of my favorite gifts: The Annotated Wizard of Oz.
For those of you who think the whole thing began at MGM in 1939, "centennial edition" means it came out in 2000--exactly one hundred years after "The Wonderful Wizard of Oz" was originally published. There were actually two other "Wizard of Oz" movies before Judy Garland danced down the Yellow Brick Road.
Naturally the story is by L. Frank Baum, who in his relatively short life wrote 14 novels about Oz, in addition to 41 other novels, 83 short stories, over 200 poems, and at least 42 stage and movie scripts. Most of this was in a period of about twenty years.
But much of the writing in this volume is by Michael Patrick Hearn, who did a deep dive into Baum's life and works. Hearn has earned his bona fides, and is an expert on both Baum and children's literature in general--he's written other annotations, and I can't imagine how much time it takes to track down so much information.
We know the story, of course, and it's printed here along with the original illustrations, in their original color. Little Dorothy (she doesn't get a last name until a later book) gets swept up in a tornado to the magical Land of Oz, where she gets a little help from her friends in reaching the Emerald City. The Great and Powerful Oz (who for some reason needs a kid to do his job) sends her to Winkie country, where--spoiler alert!--she takes out the witch, returns to the Emerald City, exposes Oz as a humbug, and loses out on her chance to get back to Kansas.
Dorothy and her friends then embark on an entirely different journey, absent from the MGM movie, to reach Glinda the Good and discover she would have saved a lot of walking if those darn silver (!) slippers had only come with an instruction manual.
https://www.amazon.com/Annotated-Wiza...
Hearn covers a lot about the book, including how it does and doesn't relate to real world happenings, and about Baum himself--both the good and the bad. He also touches on the other Oz books and Baum's entire volume of work, how his childhood led up to Baum's writing career, and his travels with his family. (It turns out "Kansas" was mostly based on a drought-stricken South Dakota.)
Of particular interest is the Baum family relocation to the little, orange-grove dominated village of Hollywood, where Baum became an early leader of the burgeoning film industry. Like most businesses he got involved with, the Oz Film Manufacturing Company had a rocky life.
"The Annotated Wizard of Oz" would be worth the cost just for the illustrations, from both the book itself and other works by Baum and his co-creators. As for me, I'm in the middle of writing a novel in which Lyman Frank Baum has a part, and the background info was not only fascinating, but helped me get inside his head in ways just reading the stories couldn't. If you're a fan of Oz or literature, this book would be of interest. If you're not a fan of Oz, I'm puzzled but I forgive you.
http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/&quo... R Hunter"
