Amanda Usen's Blog, page 6

A Promise of Fire

The sun is out today, and I might not need a sweatshirt…maybe. It’s been a chilly spring. Brrrrrrr!

[image error]Anyway, here’s what’s on my mind today: a writer friend posted on FB about how she’s DNFing (DNF=did not finish) a ton of books lately. I’m in the same boat. Discoverability is really hard for readers AND writers right now. I desperately want good books to read, but I don’t know where to find them. I want readers to find MY books (which I think are very good, OF COURSE), but I don’t know how to make them get discovered other than by spending a ton of money on promotion that likely won’t work. (This is why I have a day job! I love my day job.)

It seems like the best way to make money writing is to publish a lot of books so that you always have something new to talk about on social media. However, fast books are often like fast food for me. They hit the spot, but I hate myself for reading them. For example, I just read a book by a popular and edgy NYT bestselling author. The writing was great. The voice and heroine were engaging, but the plot was THIN, people. The conflict existed only in the most basic sense: past relationships made them wary. At the end, the hero and heroine decided the problems keeping them apart weren’t really problems at all.

Oh.

Yes, I felt sick. And I wanted to post a review pointing out that although compromise is a good way to solve problems, the change has to actually be CHANGE, not just changing your mind. Anyway, it felt rushed, and I was annoyed. A good editor should point out all that stuff, so the author can beef it up. The book was almost good, but now I probably won’t pick up another one by that author. So now what do I read?

[image error]Honestly, I’ve been visiting my beautiful bookshelf and re-reading books I love. I’m awaiting WHITE HOT by Ilona Andrews and HEART ON FIRE, the third book in the Kingmaker Chronicles by Amanda Bouchet. Have you discovered Amanda Bouchet? If not, let me introduce you. I was on FB and a friend recommended her first book, A Promise of Fire (The Kingmaker Chronicles)[image error]. Because personal recommendations are one sure-fire way to find good books, I got it out of the library. I LOVED it, bought it on Amazon and pre-ordered the second book, Breath of Fire (The Kingmaker Chronicles)[image error] which I think was coming out a YEAR after the first (YAY! A slow book! And double yay because by the time I read Book 1, I only had to wait a few months for BREATH OF FIRE, Book 2). And now I’m waiting for Book 3, Heart on Fire (The Kingmaker Chronicles)[image error]. Another year, but January 2nd will be aaaaaaawesome!

So A PROMISE OF FIRE starts in a medieval-like times traveling circus where the performers have magic powers. Holy crap, what a great premise. As it turns out, the heroine has super-crazy jacked-up power and she’s HIDING from very mysterious bad people. She displays her power in front of a dangerous, sexy dude who throws her on his horse and takes off with her, and she spends the next good bit of the book physically TIED to him, so she won’t run away. The world building is awesome, the sexual tension is crazy. (Full disclosure, IMHO they should have gotten a lot busier, a lot faster, but I’m kind of book slutty that way.) There’s a huge mystery going on about her family (oh, I love that family shit) and her powers, and although it doesn’t get resolved in the first book, I did NOT feel cheated. The hook for Book 2 was baited in a non-annoying way. And the hook for Book 3 is AH-MAZING. I cannot wait.

[image error]And in the middle of all this book love, I did what I sometimes do when I find an author I LOVE: I wrote a fan letter. Bouchet’s book seemed to be doing really well. It had good enough buzz that people were personally recommending it on FB. And she writes for Sourcebooks Casa (who published my books SCRUMPTIOUS and LUSCIOUS). I wanted to reach out and say, “Great job! You are rocking your debut!” As a former debut author, I know how it feels to start this whole gig with high hopes, and I wanted to express my appreciation for everything she was doing to bring great books into the world.

GUESS WHAT???

She wrote me back, and I soon discovered she was as lovely and magical as her books. It’s the crunchy nuts on top of the turtle sundae when authors are personally awesome! So I asked her to say a little something about her books that I could share with all of you on my blog. Something inspiring. Or something about her inspiration. Because we all need that. We do. Here’s what the uber-talented Amanda Bouchet wanted to say to YOU:

Cat, the heroine in A Promise of Fire, is the real inspiration behind the novel and what ended up turning into The Kingmaker Chronicles trilogy. A feisty, dark-haired woman with magic to die (and kill) for was all I really had in mind when I started writing. I couldn’t get this character out of my head—spirited, snarky, powerful, but also damaged and with layers and layers of hidden doubts and fears. Cat herself and the opening circus scene, where her friends are performing with all sorts of spectacular magical talents, were so vivid in my head that I had to write something down. I had no idea where I was going with it when I started writing, but I knew there was a story there. In fact, I abandoned a paranormal romance I’d been working on for more than two years because Cat was so insistent that I tell her story instead!

And I, personally, am so glad she did. I highly recommend you buy all of her books and have yourself a wonderful time. Here’s a link to the series: The Kingmaker Chronicles (3 Book Series)[image error].

SO HOW DO YOU DISCOVER BOOKS? WHAT IS YOUR LATEST, GREATEST FIND? Please, for the love of all the book loving souls looking for great reads, share your wily methods and favorite discoveries!

My latest LOVE! (Planners, Personalities, and BIG ideas)

Hi there!

When I think about writing a new blog, there’s always this little person in the back of my mind (It’s not just a voice. It’s a whole person, rolling her eyes.) telling me no one cares about that topic. So I go on with my life without writing the blog because my life is crazy busy and super interesting (even if only to me). Of course, there’s another person (This one has her hands on her hips and is sighing and shaking her head SO SADLY.) who thinks I should blog at LEAST twice a week to build my author brand so I don’t disappear while I’m writing this monster of a book that eats my heart every day. So I go on with my life without writing the blog because that person is nuts and there are too many good books to read to spend that much time writing.

But I like to SHARE, so when I have something I think you guys might love, I blog.

So…one great thing that has made my life love-lier IS:

[image error]My Me & My Big Ideas planner. No. Really.

I’m not a planner. I’m not. (I wasn’t.) I’m not crafty. At. All. And I couldn’t understand why all my author friends were talking about stickers and posting pictures of their planners. It seemed so silly. My author friends are smart. And have super busy lives, and…stickers? Whaaaaaaat?

But then (in January) I somehow came across a Me & My Big Ideas Planner on the internet, and people, they have videos of each planner, so you can look through them and see all the inspiring quotes. Inspiring quotes are something I can really get behind. Because WORDS! My particular favorite in this planner is “No grit. No pearl.” But I also like the one about balance. Of course.

I really want to finish this book.

[image error]So I got to thinking, “What if I got a cool planner and put all the stuff I usually write on post-it notes each DAY, and kept track of my life in ONE place? And then what if I figured out a reasonable way to really focus and prioritize and delight in my writing projects with the whole YEAR in sight and not just one DAY scribbled on a post-it that ends up mashed and lost in a pocket somewhere? What if? What if I were somehow ACCOUNTABLE?”

The eye-roller told me I’ve bought planners before and I will waste money AND fail.

HOWEVER, I’m bigger than the eye-roller, and I’ve learned a little something about my personality type, thanks to that little trip to Palm Springs with my high school BFF last year. (Thanks, Erin!) I’m an obliger. Which means I find it easy to keep promises to others…but not to myself. (Find YOUR personality type here! There’s an article and a video with links to Gretchen Rubin’s site where you can take a quiz. See if it helps you reach your GOALS. It’s given me a lot to think about this year.)

So I found a way to make this planner thing work for my obliging self…by dragging my friend Jessica Topper into it. She’s not a planner, either, and frankly, she’s a little stuck on her book, like me. She said no, because non-planner people are resistant. But I was enthusiastic, and eventually she was as seduced and intoxicated by the idea of making things happen as I was. Plus, I made it an early birthday present, so she had nothing to lose. LOL. (See, there’s persuasion and then there’s bullying. I’m an Aries. It’s a fine line. But so is she, so it’s all good. I got her the same one I got myself because you should give other people things you want for yourself, right?) We decided to meet on convenient Sundays and plan/dream/brainstorm and keep our big ideas present in our lives instead of hidden on post-it notes jammed in forgotten pockets.

And I think it’s working! I have a long running list of things I check off or transfer from week to week. I write down the appointments and work things that usually hover in the back of my mind making me uncomfortable and I get them done. On the creative side, I can’t avoid the fact that I want to get the book done because there are all these cute little stickers cheering me on. It’s so easy for me to prioritize the work and family goals and ignore my creative goals (because they’re only important to me). Planning is helping me do ALL the things, and meeting my creative goals is DELIGHTING me, and talking to Jess makes the things HAPPEN. Don’t tell anyone, (especially the eye-roller) but I’ve planned to finish the monster book THIS MONTH.)

[image error]It’s Jess’s birthday today and mine on Saturday, so we are celebrating, planning, writing, having lunch, and going to yoga. Banner day! So happy birthday to us and to all the other April babies out there! Do you use a planner? Does it make you HAPPY? Which one?

HOTtest thing ON ICE!

Hi everybody!

It’s spring! It’s spring! My yard is dappled with melting snow and shingles that blew off in the windstorm that happened right before the heavens opened up and dumped two feet of snow on us, but it’s spring!

And that means HOCKEY! Actually, I have no idea when people play hockey, but it’s probably the fall. That seems to be when they jack the parking lot prices up downtown when I’m teaching and make me beg for a discount because I’m a poor professor.

[image error]However, HOT ON ICE, an anthology of 18 hot hockey romances is out today! I considered taking part in this anthology for a hot half-second when these super-cool women asked me to join them, but I don’t sports. Like, at all. I have never, in this life of mine, taken time to understand the rules. But I’ve loved sports romance ever since Jaci Burton’s series with all those shirtless athletes. Molly O’Keefe had some great hockey players, too. I love the adrenaline, the alpha, and the sweat, but I am perfectly content not to write about it. Let’s leave that to people who love it — the authors of HOT ON ICE.

Hot on Ice: A Hockey Romance Anthology[image error] .99 cents. Hot hockey heroes. Some of my favorite authors AND people. I actually pre-ordered this one, folks, and I never do that. If sports romance is your thing, go get it!

And here’s the link to the Facebook Party going on all day. I’ll be there! If you have never taken part in one of these things, check it out. Authors give away tons of books and stuff. I’m giving away the bowl scrapers I ordered for Wild Wicked Weekend swag bags. (Yes, I know I promised you a re-cap of the weekend, but, as it turns out, what happens at the dungeon stays in the dungeon. Vegas rules, apparently, and I signed something to that effect. However, I’m not sure that applies to MY experience. I am the confessional sort, however, my mom reads this blog! LOL. Another day for that post!)

In order to win at the HOT ON ICE Party, you have to join the party. Like, actually click “join” or “going” or whatever on the party page. That way they can find you and tell you what you scored.

[image error]Another reason to buy the book: part of the proceeds are going to Homes for our Troops, a charity that builds specially modified homes for injured veterans. I’d love these hardworking women to make a big splash with their book, so even if hockey ain’t your thing or you hate FB parties, would you mind sharing the HOT ON ICE news with some of your sports-minded reader friends? I’d appreciate it! FB, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest, whatever you got. (As an aside, whenever the topic comes up, my Instagram-addicted teen tells me FB is for moms. Bwahahaha! I am that mom, and I’ll be in and out of the Hot On Ice FB party all day.)

Happy spring, my friends! Here’s hoping it grabs a hockey stick and beats winter’s chilly butt into the ground.

XOXO,

Amanda

Free Book for Wild Wicked Weekend!

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Download for FREE from iBooks, Amazon, Kobo, and Barnes and Noble.

Whew! I made it through another five weeks of teaching four nights a week while working weekends and sometimes during the week day at Wegmans. I had many moments of “I’m too old for this.” However, on the whole, I got enough sleep, I remembered to pack meals, I stayed hydrated, and I even managed to make significant progress figuring out how to finish the book. (Sometimes it’s complicated to be a person who writes by the seat of her yoga pants. It got MORE complicated when I decided I wanted this book to follow a hero’s journey and that I wanted to outline the second half BEFORE I wrote it.)

ONWARD! The next big thing on my list is attending Wild Wicked Weekend in San Antonio with my friend Jennifer Kacey and her mom. I usually attend craft-based conferences because I’m a craft junkie, and there are few things I love more than listening to a writer talk about process. However, this is a just-for-fun con. I’m not signing or presenting a workshop, I’m just going to talk about sexy books with like-minded readers and writers, drink margaritas, respectfully admire the physiques of the cover models who help sponsor the weekend and…perhaps visit a dungeon.

She Doesn’t Doubt Herself

I have a friend with serious health problems. Not only does she have lupus, she has just about every intersecting disease you can possibly have when your immune system has gone rogue and decided to destroy your home planet. AND before she got her official diagnosis, she was dicked around by doctors for YEARS. One of them even tried to tell her it was all in her head and get her to take antidepressants. Like THAT would make it all go away.

Now my friend is one seriously smart cookie. She did the research. She diagnosed herself. She suggested which tests would help narrow down the causes of all her symptoms, and she pointed out all the intersecting diseases associated with lupus. And they patted her on the head and told her she was wrong. Probably.

However, after repeated and painful testing, she proved herself right. Unfortunately. Sort of. (It’s good to FINALLY have a diagnosis to work with.)

Imagine feeling like crap all of the time. Having no energy. Having random parts of your body go numb. Not being able to eat because your stomach shrieks every time you put food in it. Having a migraine for weeks at a time. Being disoriented. Dizzy. Breaking out in rashes. Hurting EVERY TIME YOU MOVE.

Can you imagine? I honestly can’t. I’d be a mess.

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My friend is also gorgeous, so I put her on the cover of Bottoms Up! It totally delighted me to have that power. If you would like to learn more about her lupus struggles,

But my friend refuses to let her spirit be conquered by her body. She has published several books in the last 17 months (during a lupus flare that just won’t let go). She has started two new businesses, adding to the three she already runs. She’s a mom. She dresses like a real person and goes to work. She’s seen more movies than I have this year. She does ALL THE THINGS. She’s told me that if she has to feel like shit all the time, she’s determined to feel like shit while doing the things she wants to do. She isn’t going to let her health stop her more than absolutely necessary.

As I was driving my middle kid to her early jazz band practice this morning, I pondered where and how and what makes my friend able to keep going and doing and ass kicking while her body is shutting down. And yes, I compared myself to her because I haven’t published anything new (except the re-releases of the Come Again series) in the last 17 months. It came to me – instantly. The same epiphany I always have. No blinding burst of like, exactly, but enough illumination to make me want to share it with you.

My friend doesn’t doubt herself. Not even when DOCTORS disagree with her. She perseveres. She finds new doctors. She keeps writing and publishing what she wants, where she wants, when she wants. She doesn’t question every idea, sentence, chapter. She creates and keeps creating and doesn’t waste energy telling herself she’s wrong.

I question EVERYTHING. I wear myself out. Unnecessarily, so unnecessarily. It’s hard to stop doubting when doubt is hardwired, but it isn’t impossible. It’s a worthy practice.

(I must come to this realization every year because I wrote this: Vulnerability equals connection: on joy, pastries, passion, and not being a spirit crusher last year at about this time. And probably something similar the year before that. Consistency, for the win!)

Doubt sucks. I’d finally get this book finished if I stopped doubting myself. I’d do all kinds of other epic things. I know it.

I also wouldn’t be me, so there’s that. I can’t flip a switch and become a sunny optimist, but I can be inspired by the example my friends sets. I might never know what it is like not to doubt myself, but I DO know what it is like to continue creating despite all my inner fears. THAT I can do.

My mind opened up a little bit this morning. I felt inspired. Ready to kick a little ass myself. So I wanted to share my old/new groundbreaking, ass kicking burst of hell yes, you can, forge ahead, and use your doubts to fuel your life’s work.

You’re going to do it anyway. Do it without doubt. Go all Nike on yourself for a minute. For as many minutes as you can.

Do you have any thoughts on the subject of self-doubt and creativity? I am endlessly fascinated by that subject, and I’d love to hear from you! XOXO

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Cat’s in the Cradle

I heard “Cat’s in the Cradle” by Harry Chapin while I was at work the other day. Do you know the song? The first time I heard it, I was a child, and I knew it was the story of my life, even then. Or at least, the first 1/3 of it.

Then the second 1/3.

I’ve been thinking about writing a blog post about a change I’ve made in my life, but my internal editor has been going nuts. “Don’t share that, you’ll sound holier than thou, like you want a pat on the back. Some people don’t have mothers, you know. You’ll make them sad.” Basically, every variation of “shut up, you’re stupid” that my dark side can come up with. Let me tell you, when I’m working a lot like I am now and I’m tired, my dark side is very chatty. I haven’t posted a blog for over a month because this is what I want to say, and everything else is trapped behind it:

Call your mother.

If you can. If she wants to hear from you. If you’re just too busy. If it’s hard. If she’s getting old. If you will regret not staying in close touch when she is gone, call her now. Call her every day.

Yep, I knew it. Now I feel like a jerk, and I’m staring at those sentences thinking of revising them to something that relates only to me, so I don’t sound stupid. Like, “I’ve been calling my mother every morning for about a month now.” I mean, really, what’s so special about that? Lots of people (better than I) call their parents every day. Do things for them, even. Not everyone left home at 18 and basically never went back because they were too sensitive to handle the family dynamic. You know that scene in that V.C. Andrews book where Cathy goes back and pours wax on her paralyzed grandmother’s hair? I understand those emotions, although that scene horrified me.

My mother stays at home taking care of my invalid father, and she doesn’t call me because she knows how busy I am. She’s actually said that. For years. And I did my best to call her, but I wasn’t that good at it. What sparked the change? What actually drove home the point that I needed to take ten minutes out of my “busy” day to check in with the person who labored to teach me unconditional love?

My friends’ mothers are dying.

And it is devastating to them. I’m making soup, lasagna, and salted caramels. I’m texting, checking in, and listening, but there is really nothing I can do to help. And I know I will be devastated one day, too. These friends are two of the closest I have in my life, and they are lucky because they kept their mothers close, talked to them often, and said all of the things you need to say before your Mama goes. So this is partly selfish, I guess. Eventually, I will lose my mother, and I can’t lose her like this.

It’s 8:27 am. The kids are walking to the bus stop. I always watch them to make sure they don’t get abducted by aliens while I’m cleaning up the breakfast and lunch-making mess in the kitchen. That’s my cue to call my mother. And Sunday afternoon’s exhaustion is my cue to FaceTime her and walk around the house spotlighting her grandchildren and her son-in-law cooking dinner shirtless. To share my busy life with my mom. It’s filled a hole in my life I didn’t know I had, and I’m glad I still have the opportunity to do it. She doesn’t mind if I put her on speakerphone while I clean up the kitchen or fold laundry.

Happy February, everyone! Call your mom, if you can! I will dedicate a yoga practice to those of you who can’t, for any reason. For healing and peace. For memories being blessings, and ever and always LOVE.

XOXO,

Amanda

Something you might already know and some things you don’t!

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Sometimes I find drawings on the kitchen table when I get home from work. In 2017, let’s be as intrepid as this guy!

I love going to workshops and re-reading craft books that tell me things I’ve already learned about writing. No, not just writing. Life. Seriously. There are so many parallels between my approach to writing and my approach to life it’s crazy.

For example, yesterday afternoon, as I was walking across the length of the Wegmans parking lot to go to work, enjoying the piercing wind whistling through my unzipped jacket, frosting my ungloved fingers, and playing hell with my un-hatted hair, I was mentally flogging myself for not getting the ONE THING done on my to-do list that means everything to me: writing.

And just like that, I realized why I didn’t finish the scene I’ve already re-written twice. It kind of sucks. I keep going in there and trying to make my people do what needs to be done. In this case, I want the heroine and cohorts to follow the hero on the rescue-the-mother mission. I want the heroine to be afraid to use her power again which will cause something horrible to happen. I want them to get their asses kicked and for something horrible to happen, which will make the heroine following the hero necessary instead of foolhardy. But right now, it isn’t working. And that’s why I don’t want to do it! So, back to the beginning of the scene for me.

Which on some level I already knew but I needed to learn it again. Does that happen to you? Every so often, do you need to be reminded of basic things that keep your world spinning? (That’s the thing you might already know.)

And here are the things you didn’t know until I wrote this: the winners of the Come Again Release Day Celebration are Robyn D (Rafflecopter) and Anita H (blog/FB/Twitter/Instagram)! You two ladies can expect an e-mail from me very soon!

Happy New Year, everyone! Get in there like the heroes you are and keep your worlds spinning. XOXO

 

Jerkalicious Party Mix Recipe

[image error]Happy soon to be holidays, everyone! I work in a bakery, and it’s totally nuts. But I LOVE nuts! Especially in party mix, which I eat by the bowlful at this time of year. Is party mix/Chex Mix part of your holiday tradition? My mother always made it, and my father’s mother always made it (which is probably why my mom makes it, come to think of it!). This particular batch got decimated by my children before I could get a decent picture. I actually had to make a fresh batch the next morning, so that I could send a box to my mommy!

We all make it a little differently. I’m usually a traditionalist, but this year, my friend Chef Krista gave me a bottle of her Jerkalicious Hot Sauce. At first whiff, I knew it would be a great addition to party mix. [image error]It smells like Worcestershire Sauce having an affair with Caribbean food! You can get the recipe and a link to Chef Krista’s website, where you can buy the Jerkalicious Hot Sauce, on Entangled in Romance, along with some other great recipes from Entangled authors.

Do you have a favorite holiday food? One without which it doesn’t feel like Christmas (or Hanukkah or Solstice or whatever)? What is it? Leave a comment before midnight, and I’ll enter you in my Come Again Giveaway! (A $15 GC to The Ripper Bodice or a super-secret good sex toy. Yes, it sounds strange, but trust me.)

This isn’t a post for the people making a ton of money publishing

This is a post for the rest of us. Like it or not, money is often equated with success, and success is often equated with happiness. But it just ain’t so.

So my Middle Kid had an early jazz band practice, and I was listening to Pentatonix sing Hallelujah on the way home. Go buy Hallelujah on iTunes right now. Right now. No, seriously. Or go listen to it on Youtube. I’ll put the link at the bottom. Anyone with an ounce of passion in them needs to hear them sing this tune. All that Catholic schooling aside, I haven’t been a practicing Christian in 20 years, so why does this song resonate with me so hard, even after I’ve listened to it, like, 1000 times since I bought it? (Rest in peace, Leonard Cohen. Your memory is certainly blessing me this year.)

Hallelujah resonates because of the passion, I think. It creates a connection. Between writer/singers and listeners. Between writer and readers. We know it when we hear it/see it. And it grabs us. Which led me to thinking about how hard it is to get that passion onto the page. Sometimes I wish I could physically rub what is in my heart onto the page because it is so much better than what is coming out of my fingers once it passes through my brain. My filter. My internal editor. I write mySELF, my VOICE, out of my words so often it’s become a habit. Gotta make ’em pretty. Gotta make ’em flow. Gotta connect my thoughts. And I’ve had great editors, but sometimes, they took a piece of me out of my work, too, and I let it happen because I didn’t trust mySELF enough to fight for me.

It probably had something to do with deadlines and my desire to pump out three books a year and be “successful.” I don’t have any deadlines now, but I fight the urge to give them to myself in order to be productive. My definition of productive is finishing the book. That’s also my definition of success. But I am fighting so damn hard to change both of those into making the book that lands on the page as rich and passionate as the book in my heart. And that is requiring SO MUCH MORE TIME and THOUGHT and EXPLORATION than I ever imagined. It’s hard to be okay with that when I spent years training myself to think that success=happiness=finishing the book=making money. (Which is why this isn’t a post for writers making big money. Money brings its own inspiration. It just does.)

Writers, I don’t know about you, but when #1k1hr/3 or more books a year/butt in chair/write full-time entered my world, I started feeling like I wasn’t getting anything done. And that feeling made me want to do even less.

Yes, I still want to finish the book, damn right I do (and I bet you do, too). And I want to write another book in the Hot Nights series. And I want to write a womens fic book just because. And feeling like shit isn’t going to get me there. Butt in chair ALL THE TIME isn’t going to get me there because my butt needs other stuff, too. Like yoga. And fruitcake, party mix, au gratin brussels sprouts, and caramels made by me. I need to read. And watch Sherlock. And hang out with my family.

SO.

Here are a few of MY new definitions of success, and I invite you add your own in the comments. Comments will automatically enter you in my Come Again Series Giveaway (GC to The Ripped Bodice or, um, my favorite sex toy, new in box OF COURSE).

Write for one single hour OR cross a thing off the list of things that need to get done in the WIP. Progress is progress.
Go to work and do a good job. Listen, some days, that’s all we can do. The day job pays the bills.
Feel good. Make the mental adjustment required to reject negative judgement, within or without, and be fine with the work that is getting done and know that the rest of the work WILL get done. Eventually. It is perfectly okay to go around feeling good about yourself instead of apologizing, downplaying, or self-deprecating.

Be vulnerable. Be authentic. Own yourSELF. Do YOU. And practice believing you are worthy. Not just good enough but valuable. Give yourself permission to feel happy and successful simply because you are breathing and go about your day feeling good.

Writers, connect with the passion you have for yourself, so you can share it. Maybe even on the page. Reject the outside voices telling you your words should be different and write the words in your heart. That’s how you find the good stuff.

Believe it.

And…

Watch the Youtube video of Pentatonix singing HALLELUJAH!

And lest you think it’s easy for me to cast off internalized judgements, this picture (taken at Middle Kid’s bat mitzvah) nearly sent me shrieking for a dye bottle. But I’m still doing me. For now. LOL.

Do you holi-craze?

Get this delightful Christmas e-short story when you sign up for Jessica Topper’s newsletter, which you should totally do! And then buy her books because they are delightful!

My Christian roots are damn glad Hanukkah starts on Christmas Eve this year! Almost every year I get blindsided by an early Hanukkah, and my internal clock is, like, WTF? Are you kidding me? I have no gift ideas and no holiday spirit yet! Luckily, the Jewish folks in my world are pretty low key about that holiday. They get their groove on hardcore for the high holidays like Passover, Rosh Hashanah, and Yom Kippur, but for Hanukkah we just get together as a family on one day during the eight and exchange gifts. Of course, over-achiever mother-of Jews that I am, I try to have a gift for the kids to open every night. Basically, that means I rush out to buy gifts last minute, and then rush to wrap one for each kid each night. I’m going on year 15 of that ridiculous behavior, but at least this year Thanksgiving and Hanukkah don’t collide because THAT was a huge surprise. Or maybe, I’ll change my procrastinating ways. I have a list going. It could happen.

But no matter when Hanukkah happens, I can’t quite shake the urge to give gifts to all the people I love at Christmas time. Even though it drives me up a wall. And costs a mint. Even though we don’t celebrate Christmas, and every year I think to myself, “Self, get your act together and give all of these people gifts at Thanksgiving. Because you are grateful for them.” Even if I did get my act together in time, which I won’t, I’d still catch the Christmas fever and drive myself nuts anyway. *groan*

Just one little way I drive myself crazy at Christmas. It’s fun! Try it!

I can’t help it! It doesn’t smell like Christmas without baking fruitcakes. I baked my first fruitcake a LONG time ago in an effort to give my father something he might actually like for Christmas. Now it’s tradition, and I bake four batches, roughly 28 mini loaves. Everyone who tastes one wants one, and once you get on the fruitcake list, you pretty much have to perish to get off of it. If you would like to make YOUR house smell like Christmas heaven and have a small pile of delightful fruitcakes to give as gifts, here’s the recipe for Grandpa Baker’s Amazing Fruitcake, a little Christmas gift from me to you.

And for my Jewish friends, a latke cooking tip. The other night, my husband made latkes for dinner, and he tried something new. He grated the potatoes and onion, and then he blanched them, cooking almost fully but not falling apart, before he drained them. (Next time he said he would omit the onion because he didn’t like it with the sour cream and apple sauce. I put ketchup on mine, lol, so all good.) He cooled them and squeezed them dry before proceeding with a latke recipe. At least, you would proceed with a latke recipe. He just made it up, but he has a lot of cooking experience and probably a latke shared genetic memory or something. THEY WERE SO AMAZING. Less starchy. Without that “is it done or not?” texture. Insanely good with all the usual accoutrements like sour cream and apple sauce. Also good with ketchup and Sriracha and a fried egg on top. Super good leftover the next day on a sandwich… So, latke makers, please try cooking your grated potatoes first and tell me how it turns out for you!

MERRY CHRISTMAS, INDEED!

Lastly, a gift for all the faiths! Because this Christmas story written by a nice Jewish girl is a treat for anyone. I love my pal Jessica Topper’s books, and she’s offering a FREE short story to her newsletter subscribers. It’s totally worth signing up for her (very occasional) newsletter to get this heartwarming Love & Steel short story (KAT AND ADRIAN!) and to be alerted when her books come out. Because I have no words for how beautiful HER words are. You don’t want to miss out on this amazing author.

Enjoy the holi-craze, my friends! And if you don’t celebrate anything in this month, enjoy the contact high!