Matthew Lang's Blog, page 15
December 20, 2011
Lycanthropy and Charlie Cochrane
Christmas is just around the corner, and in celebration of the festive season, I'm very happy to introduce the fantastic Charlie Cochrane, author of Wolves of the West and one I owe a great debt to for the fantastic advice she gave me when I was first starting out. She does, of course have a fantastic new story out, entitled What You Will, which is out right now, but I started by asking her what the funniest Christmas Memory she had that she'd like to share with you all.
So many to choose from. The year the younger Cochranes ate so much they had to lie on the dining room floor? The Christmas Mr C put so much sage in the stuffing it tasted like disinfectant? The year I ended up buying two lots of pressies because I'd misplaced the ones I bought earlier in the year and put "somewhere safe"? The Christmas people sat sending each other blackberry messages from settee to settee as they didn't like what was on telly? The year I had to label all the food so it wasn't eaten before the appointed day? Oh, hold on – that's every year!
Aside from What You Will—which everyone should buy—what do you think is a failsafe Christmas Gift?
Boring answer – Amazon vouchers. Then everyone can get exactly what they want.
More interesting answer – something linked to a particular family/friendship event. Specially made mugs with holiday pictures and catchphrases. Personalised calendars or cards. There are loads of companies producing them and they're really cost effective.
What inspired your new story, What You Will?
Shakespeare himself. He's got two plays – Merchant of Venice and Twelfth Night – both of which feature guys called Antonio, both of whom seem to be in love with younger men. And both the younger men are pretty ungrateful wretches. They take Antonio's money, let him risk his neck for them, then run off with women! I've often wondered if the based the character on someone he knew, who'd been taken for a similar ride.
Anyhow, I've always wanted to write a "fix it" version of the Twelfth Night story – especially after seeing the wonderful version of Twelfth Night at Chichester (Patrick Stewart as Malvolio) in which the gender complications were accentuated). When this series of stories came up, I knew my idea had found a potential home, especially when i added a bit of steampunk (another thing I've long fancied dabbling in).
What's your best Christmas Recipe for dinner party success?
Best recipe is not to try anything too OTT and fiddly, especially if that a) courts disaster and b) risks you not spending enough time with your guests. They've come to you for your company, not to be waited on by Michel Roux, so be with them, chat with them, marinate them with wine. If you must be in the kitchen, take them in there too, while you cook.
Don't sacrifice the social to the culinary – there are plenty of great recipes which taste spectacular although they're really easy to prepare and serve. Try looking on the Waitrose site – here's a starter: Mushroom and Chestnut Pudding with Rich Red Wine Sauce.
You say you only write (occasionally) about respectable gay werewolves. What's the difference between a respectable gay werewolf, and a gay werewolf of disrepute?
Respectable gay werewolves hold jobs in such places as the Natural History Museum or the V&A. They convene in the hallowed halls of one of these on the night of the full moon so that any shifting can be undergone in a decent manner and in salubrious surroundings. They don't howl at the moon, just bay politely. Nor do they look for human prey, preferring a fox or a feral squirrel. Or rooting around the bins at the back of the Indian restaurant.
They listen to frighteningly intellectual lectures related to lycanthropy, lectures involving mitochondrial DNA or cross species breeding in the Red wolf. They watch rugby, not football.
Generally, they're the sort of werewolf you wouldn't mind as your neighbour and who you'd vote in for membership of the golf club.
So I can't confirm Werewolves, but I can confirm an homage to the great Shakespeare himself (or themselves, if you believe certain theories out there in literary circles). And a Charlie Cochrane (TM) take on Twelfth Night? Do yourself a favour and get your copy now:
They say there's no fool like an old fool. Antonio didn't count himself as old but he was more fool than any man ought to be who's flown around the world and back again so often he might as well have just been going from Deptford to Dartford. There was a lad involved. There's always a lad in the tale, for such as him.
And was there a happy ending? Now that depends on whether you believe what a certain playwright wrote, or whether you want the real story.
Want more Charlie? Find her on Facebook, or Follow her on Twitter!
December 18, 2011
Hanukkah with Keira Andrews!
With the huge and continual emphasis on Christmas happenings in the world–at least the western world–it's very easy to forget that not everyone follows the cult of the jolly fat gift giving man, and there are a lot of other traditions out there, one of the more prominent ones being, of course, Hanukkah, the Jewish Festival of Lights. It falls somewhere between late November and late December, and this year is on the 20th.
In honour of the festival I'd like to introduce author Keira Andrews, who's Hanukkah Story, Eight Nights, is available from Loose Id. I started by asking her what her funniest Hannukah (or Christmas) memory was.
A Christmas memory that always makes me laugh is the year I went snooping and found an Atari game system in my parents' closet. I was so excited, and because I was eight years old and couldn't keep a secret to save my life, my mom found out. She casually mentioned the next day that they were hiding an Atari for my cousins. I was heartbroken! When my sister and I opened up the Atari on Christmas morning, we were absolutely ecstatic. My parents said we were very lucky they didn't return it after what I pulled, and I learned to never hunt for gifts again!
Aside from your book—which everyone should buy—what do you think is a failsafe Christmas gift?
You can't go wrong with fruitcake. Kidding, kidding! In my experience, electronic devices never miss – especially if it's a luxury item the person can't justify buying for themselves (iPod, camera, Blu-ray player, etc.).
What inspired Eight Nights?
I was inspired to write Eight Nights after spending Hanukkah with a friend and her family. I really enjoyed learning about different holiday traditions – and eating new kinds of holiday food!
What's your best Christmas recipe for dinner party success?
The key to holiday dinner party success? Lots of alcohol. 
Also, my mom's curry dip is always a hit. Serve with fresh veggies for an easy and delicious appetizer.
CURRY DIP
1/2 Cup Mayonnaise (can be low-fat if you prefer)
2 tbs Ketchup (tomato sauce)
2 tbs honey
2 tbs onion power/onion flakes
1 tbs lemon juice
1 tsp curry powder
6 drops Tobasco sauce/to taste
Salt
Mix all ingredients and serve.
I know you don't believe in guilty pleasures, so what's your most obscure guilt-free pleasure?
Hmm, that would probably be watching figure skating. Most people only pay attention to the sport every four years, but I'm an avid follower year in and year out.
So get into the Hannukah Spirit this year, and grab yourself a copy of Eight Nights.
Lucas McKenzie figures spending the holidays with his annoying roommate's family is better than being alone on campus. The last thing he expects is to lust over Sam's brother — or for Nate to actually want him back.
They hide their attraction during Hanukkah celebrations, but behind closed doors, Lucas and Nate can't keep their hands (or mouths) off each other. Nate's only looking for a bit of holiday fun, and amazing sex with a hot virgin definitely fits the bill.
Yet as the candles burn, Nate and Lucas begin to realize eight nights will never be enough.
Want more Keira Andrews? Check out her website, find her on Facebook or follow her on Twitter.
Hannukah with Kiera Andrews!
With the huge and continual emphasis on Christmas happenings in the world–at least the western world–it's very easy to forget that not everyone follows the cult of the jolly fat gift giving man, and there are a lot of other traditions out there, one of the more prominent ones being, of course, Hanukkah, the Jewish Festival of Lights. It falls somewhere between late November and late December, and this year is on the 20th.
In honour of the festival I'd like to introduce author Kiera Andrews, who's Hannukah Story, Eight Nights, is available from Loose Id. I started by asking her what her funniest Hannukah (or Christmas) memory was.
A Christmas memory that always makes me laugh is the year I went snooping and found an Atari game system in my parents' closet. I was so excited, and because I was eight years old and couldn't keep a secret to save my life, my mom found out. She casually mentioned the next day that they were hiding an Atari for my cousins. I was heartbroken! When my sister and I opened up the Atari on Christmas morning, we were absolutely ecstatic. My parents said we were very lucky they didn't return it after what I pulled, and I learned to never hunt for gifts again!
Aside from your book—which everyone should buy—what do you think is a failsafe Christmas gift?
You can't go wrong with fruitcake. Kidding, kidding! In my experience, electronic devices never miss – especially if it's a luxury item the person can't justify buying for themselves (iPod, camera, Blu-ray player, etc.).
What inspired Eight Nights?
I was inspired to write Eight Nights after spending Hanukkah with a friend and her family. I really enjoyed learning about different holiday traditions – and eating new kinds of holiday food!
What's your best Christmas recipe for dinner party success?
The key to holiday dinner party success? Lots of alcohol. Also, my mom's curry dip is always a hit. Serve with fresh veggies for an easy and delicious appetizer.
CURRY DIP
1/2 Cup Mayonnaise (can be low-fat if you prefer)
2 tbs Ketchup (tomato sauce)
2 tbs honey
2 tbs onion power/onion flakes
1 tbs lemon juice
1 tsp curry powder
6 drops Tobasco sauce/to taste
Salt
Mix all ingredients and serve.
I know you don't believe in guilty pleasures, so what's your most obscure guilt-free pleasure?
Hmm, that would probably be watching figure skating. Most people only pay attention to the sport every four years, but I'm an avid follower year in and year out.
So get into the Hannukah Spirit this year, and grab yourself a copy of Eight Nights.
Lucas McKenzie figures spending the holidays with his annoying roommate's family is better than being alone on campus. The last thing he expects is to lust over Sam's brother — or for Nate to actually want him back.
They hide their attraction during Hanukkah celebrations, but behind closed doors, Lucas and Nate can't keep their hands (or mouths) off each other. Nate's only looking for a bit of holiday fun, and amazing sex with a hot virgin definitely fits the bill.
Yet as the candles burn, Nate and Lucas begin to realize eight nights will never be enough.
Want more Keira Andrews? Check out her website, find her on Facebook or follow her on Twitter.
December 13, 2011
Cherie Noel on Cuddle Time and Christmas Memories
Today I'd like to introduce author Cherie Noel, here to share some Christmas cheer and some stories to stuff in your stocking…or for stuffing inspiration anyway. She has not one, but two Christmas stories out at the moment and I caught up with her to grill her about life, writing, and holiday silliness.
What do you love best about this time of year?
Huh. The twinkling lights. No, really. They make me think of every single magical moment in my life.
What inspired your new story?
*blinks* Which one? Christmas Rum Balls was inspired by Tony, Neil, and Kevin, the main characters, who were originally inspired by a picture chosen by a reader from the M/M romance group on Goodreads. Thanks Heather C. for giving me the boys…Or, I also have Cuddle Time Chicken Soup…and that was inspired by Robert and Christie of The Soldier and the State Trooper…hmm. My characters seem to love Christmas and food as much as I do.
Have you got any funny tales from the holiday season you'd like to share?
Hmmm. I dunno. Funny? Not so much. Maybe the story of the time I burned the Thanksgiving turkey…well, it was more a case of broiling rather than baking. The poor bird looked golden and beautiful on the outside but was still bloody on the inside.
Well, if not funny, what's the most meaningful Christmas Memory you'd like to share?
The best Christmas memory ever? Waking up early…my sisters and I had been sleeping in the living room, and woke to find a gingerbread tree under the tree. So magical.
Aside from your books—which everyone should buy—what do you think is a failsafe Christmas Gift?
The gift of self. In my family, we take little slips of paper and write out little gifts of service we can give to one another. Foot rubs. Cups of tea. Doing a chore. Stuff like that, just—little things…and then we roll the paper up, tie a ribbon around it, write the person's name on the outside and hang it from the tree. How fun is that?
What's your best Christmas Recipe for dinner party success?
Lots and lots of Dancing Bull Merlot. That way if I burn the roast, I'm too toasted to care.
You write a lot about soldiers. What draws you to them as characters?
I come from a long line of military people. I myself served as a soldier during Operation Enduring Freedom. I…geez, I guess I really believe one should write what one knows. And I know soldiers. I love men in uniform, and I was damn proud to be a dragon soldier. That's Chemical Operations to you civilians, lol.
Keep reading for a very special excerpt from Cuddle Time Chicken Soup.
~*~
"Cuddle Time Chicken Soup? You're kidding, right?"
Christie rolled his eyes.
"Evans, does anything I've ever told you about my Aunt Cate give you any reason—any reason whatsoever—to expect her to just call the damn recipe something normal? I call it Cheesy Chicken Soup. You can call it that most of the time too. But Cate—bless her crunchy granola, tie-dyed heart—is flying in tomorrow to spend the holidays with us. You're gonna be at the house. You'd better know what she calls the damn soup, or she's liable to explain her reasoning to you."
Christie took in a slow breath.
Back when he'd lost his parents to a drunk driver at the tender age of fifteen, Cate had spent many, many moments shoving steaming mugs of her famous—infamous?—Cuddle Time Chicken Soup at him. In the foggy cold of a San Francisco summer she'd plied him with enough of the damn stuff to fill the bay. Every cup came with an extra-large helping of touchyfeely snuggling. Christie could recite the accompanying lecture verbatim. He could even—Christie rubbed his fingers together as a tactile memory of that time swept through him. The blanket she wrapped him in back then was still on the back of Cate's couch. Mocha, tan, and creamy white; to this day Christie needed only to press his fingers together to feel the nubbly soft texture. Cate told him years later that she'd knitted that particular blanket
just after Christie was born in response to a dream she'd had of his parents deaths.
Christie's throat grew thick, clogged with a thousand things left unsaid.
He blinked, hard.
The damned florescent lights in the recreation center stung his eyes.
Muscles between his shoulder blades tightened, right in the spot which had acted up ever since his most recent deployment. He rolled his shoulders forward. The good hurt of stretching muscles distracted Christie. The raw heat burning just behind his eyes eased for a moment. Christie sucked in a scrap more air and then blew the air out slowly. The urge to tell Evans to just fucking get the name of the soup right beat in his throat like a second heartbeat. Christie circled back to the same damn thought.
How hard could it be to remember to call Cate's soup what she wanted the damn stuff called? Really? Because the woman would just be looking for an excuse. Christie shook himself. Okay, yeah. She was coming for Christmas.
Still?
The house at Harrah's would take the odds she'd had a dream or some crazy premonition about the mailroom bombing the day after Christie had enlisted. Shit, most likely she'd booked her ticket for this trip then. She never missed a trick either. Her having a chat with Christie about how much he needed to spend some time snuggled up with Robert was a foregone conclusion anyone who'd spent more than two minutes around Cate would reach.
Christie shook his head.
Christ on a cracker, he really couldn't take hearing about how important touch was. He didn't want to cuddle with anyone right now. He just—everything closed in too quickly these days. And anyway, he'd heard his aunt's damn "cuddle speech" more times than he could count.
Christie shuddered.
No. Just fucking no.
He concentrated on pulling in a few more slow breaths before continuing.
"Please, man. Call the stuff by the name Cate uses while she's here. I can't bear to hear the 'Cuddle Time is Important Time' speech again."
Evans stood, his mouth slightly open, staring at Christie without blinking. Christie lifted his hand to press two fingers against his friend's neck. Evans jerked back.
"What are you doing?"
Christie put a hand on his hip.
"Checking your pulse, Evans; what did you think I was doing?"
Evans held up a hand, the palm facing Christie.
"Shun, Collins, shun. Trooper Gigantic over there just got to the point where he doesn't bare his teeth and growl when you and I are in the same freaking zip code. That man is not over our…um, my lapse of judgment when we were deployed. I kinda like hanging out with you outside of work again, and if your trooper sees you touching me all he's gonna see is me trying to get in your pants. Christie. Don't fuck up my bff time, man. You know how I get when I start jonesing for a hit of home, and right now? Dude, you're the closest I got to home with my dads off on their damn 'world tour' for the past few months."
Evans thrust one hip to the side, hands up to make quotation marks in the air before him.
Christie grinned.
Evans waving his hands in the air to talk equaled Evans needing to talk to his dads pronto. He only got this campy when he was missing them.
Christie turned his head to look across the room to where his husband Robert stood, deep in conversation with Christie's former platoon sergeant.
Sergeant Tarans nodded, one of his characteristic grunts moving visibly up from his abdomen to lift his chest. From the corner of his eye Christie caught the motion of Evans turning to look as well. Robert looked up. A vertical line appeared above the bridge of the tall blond's nose as he took in Christie's proximity to Evans. His brows drew together. Impossibly blue eyes flicked a glacial look over Christie's shoulder. Robert's chest heaved once before his eyes drooped shut. Two more breaths lifted the wide expanse of his chest before his eyelids rose to unveil the same startling cerulean-color orbs locked on Christie, burning into him like the very heart of the hottest sort of fire.
Christie's lungs stopped working, and his tongue flicked out to swipe once across his upper lip. Christ on a cracker, he could practically taste the salty goodness of Robert's cock on his tongue when the man looked at him that way.
A tiny smile tipped the corners of Robert's mouth up, and he gave a barely perceptible dip of his head. A wave of heat rushed upward from low in Christie's gut until his cheeks and forehead blazed with warmth. Like a tsunami after a huge offshore earthquake, the heat Christie felt built and built to mammoth proportions.
Then the wave crested, blood crashing back down through Christie's body. His cock flipped up faster than the top of a PEZ dispenser at a diabetic's convention.
~*~
And of course, that's about where we're going to leave you. Check out the book to get the good stuff!
Want More Cherie Noel? Find her: On the web, On Goodreads and on Facebook. You can also find her on Twitter.
December 12, 2011
30 Days of Christmas with Lex Valentine
So the prolific Lex Valentine is running a 30 Days of Christmas promo over at her blog, and today is day 18–and it's just a little bit gay.
Okay, it's a lot gay. All you have to do is leave a comment over at this post, and you could win an eBook copy of The Secret of Talmor Manor, which is very useful if you're planning on getting a copy of Christmas Memories as a gift for a friend.
And you can also win a copy of KC Burn's Cop Out, or Rick R. Reed's Orientation.
All for a single little comment. Go now. Matthew won't be offended if you leave his site for this. Really.
December 10, 2011
Christmas Memories is now out!
So the follow up to The Secret of Talmor Manor, Christmas Memories, is now out over at MLR Press! It's a stocking stuffer steal at $1.99, so head over and pick it up and find out how Jake and Nathaniel coped with their first holiday together.
Buy link: eBook, MLR Press, $1.99
If you need a bit of a refresher of how Jake and Nathaniel met, check out The Secret of Talmor Manor today.
December 6, 2011
Christmas has come early…
Actually, it's been happening over at MLR Press since the 20th of November. Sometime back in July, the founder of MLR got a little lonely and decided rather than have Christmas in July, what she really wanted was a Christmas celebration at Christmas…starting in July.
"So who wants to write a Christmas story?" she asked.
A flurry of email responses later, and several months of hard work, there are now forty something stories being released, one a day, until the end of December, along with three Anthologies. Click on the image above to check out the full sized schedule, or just head over and start shopping!
November 25, 2011
What? Non-Fiction? Really?
So I'm being a very bad NaNoer. In addition to jumping around to work on other projects (i.e. those with deadlines), I've also taken writing time out to organise some blog posts with some fantastic authors with Christmas (or other holiday of your choice) stories being released that would make the ideal Christmas present–along with my new story of course. However, I've recently received confirmation that I will be branching out into a new field for me–the field on non-fiction. Want to know more? Check out the details below:
True To Myself
Genre: Non Fiction / Inspirational
Publisher: Chicken Soup for the Soul (Anthology: Tough Times for Teens)
Expected Release Date: 7th February 2012
Synopsis:
A look back at the road to happiness, as trod by me. Anything more than this would be a spoiler.
Also look out for a more writerly focused article coming out early next year (sorry, no cover art as of yet).
Minor Character Generation Tables (Geek)
Genre: Non Fiction / Writing tool
Publisher: Vignette Press (Geek Mook)
Expected Release Date: Early 2012
Synopsis:
Sometimes you need a character. Sometimes you need a character right now. Sometimes, you need a character right now and you have no idea how to think one up. Enter the Minor Character Generation Tables. Simply take 2D10 (that's two ten sided dice for you non-geeks) and start rolling. Who will you create today?
November 24, 2011
Community Wordage: NaNoChallenge Anyone?
Image by Calamity Meg
Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternative meanings for common words. Given the spirit of November and NaNoWriMo, I heartily recommend inventing your own, or using them in your novel. Let me know if you do! And many thanks to J.P. Bowie who first pointed me towards this list:
The winners are:
1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.
2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.
6. Negligent (adj.), a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
8. Gargoyle (n), olive-flavoured mouthwash.
9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.
11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.
12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13. Pokemon (n), Rastafarian proctologist.
14. Oyster (n.), person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The belief that, when you die, your soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16. Circumvent (n.), opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.
The Washington Post's Style Invitational also asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.
Here are this year's winners:
1. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
2. Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
3. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
4. Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
6. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
7. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.
8. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease. ( that one got extra credit)
9. Karmageddon (n): Its like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
10. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
11. Glibido (v): All talk and no action.
12. Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
13. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
14. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
15. Caterpallor (n.): The colour you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating.
And the pick of the literature:
16. Ignoranus (n): A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
November 4, 2011
Pink Petal Books: Call for Submissions
This obviously isn't me (i.e. I have no affiliation with Pink Petal Books), but they're calling for submissions, and if you're looking for GLBT publication opportunities, here's one for you right now!
Call for Submissions for "Dangerous Places-Dangerous Men" anthology.
Pink Petal Books, a high-quality boutique publisher, is actively searching for erotic short stories between 7k-15k words for an anthology to be released in April 2012. At this time, we are looking for four to six tales for a 50k-word finished electronic and print book. Both published and unpublished authors are welcome.
Theme: Dangerous places- Dangerous men
Do you have a survivor-type story? A shipwrecked hero, a heroine stranded on a desert island with a hot rogue, or a couple who's lost in the steamy jungles? Did your hero drop into a war zone or does he work in an extremely perilous occupation?
If you have or are currently working on a story that might be suitable, please send directly to anthologysubs@pinkpetalbooks.com
Dangerous Places-Dangerous Men Anthology Guidelines:
7k-15k word stories must have romance, and either a happily ever after or a happily for now ending.
M/F, M/M, F/F and ménage accepted
Heat rating: crank up the heat! All erotic heat levels accepted
Submission deadline is January 15, 2012. Submit the full short story plus a blurb to anthologysubs@pinkpetalbooks.com with "Dangerous Places-Dangerous Men" in the subject line. Can't wait to hear from you!
Publishing And Payment Information:
This anthology will be released in print and ebook format simultaneously. Approximately ninety days later each story will release as individual ebooks. Royalties are paid monthly, and our general royalty structure is 40% of the sales price for all sales from our website. For third party sales, we pay 40% of what we receive. All print books pay 10% of cover price regardless of sales outlet. For anthology sales, all authors in the anthology will split royalties equally. Individual ebook sales will receive full royalties.
For more information about our submission guidelines and publishing program, please visit our website at: http://pinkpetalbooks.com/Submissions.html. If you have any questions, please contact us at anthologysubs@pinkpetalbooks.com
