Cardeno C.'s Blog, page 114
March 24, 2014
Interview, Excerpt, Giveaway, Grand Adventure, and Honey by Cardeno C.
Happy Monday. Today I have a few things to share.
1. Mary Calmes and I did an interview at Swept Away by Romance. We talked about the process of writing our shifter novel - Control and we shared an adult excerpt. The wonderful folks at Swept Away are giving away a Dreamspinner Press gift card to someone who leaves a comment.
2. My co-blogger BG Thomas is putting together a bears anthology called A Taste of Honey through Dreamspinner Press. It's a really fun idea and in addition to established authors, Dreamspinner often includes stories from new authors in their anthologies so don't let being new to the industry stop you from submitting a story.
3. I wrote a short story as part of the Grand Adventures anthology Dreamspinner put together to help Eric Arvin and TJ Klune. They'll receive all the proceeds from the sale of the book and a limited edition print of the gorgeous cover by Paul Richmond.
I hope you have a wonderful week.
CC
www.cardenoc.com
1. Mary Calmes and I did an interview at Swept Away by Romance. We talked about the process of writing our shifter novel - Control and we shared an adult excerpt. The wonderful folks at Swept Away are giving away a Dreamspinner Press gift card to someone who leaves a comment. 2. My co-blogger BG Thomas is putting together a bears anthology called A Taste of Honey through Dreamspinner Press. It's a really fun idea and in addition to established authors, Dreamspinner often includes stories from new authors in their anthologies so don't let being new to the industry stop you from submitting a story.
3. I wrote a short story as part of the Grand Adventures anthology Dreamspinner put together to help Eric Arvin and TJ Klune. They'll receive all the proceeds from the sale of the book and a limited edition print of the gorgeous cover by Paul Richmond. I hope you have a wonderful week.
CC
www.cardenoc.com
March 20, 2014
COVER REVEAL FOR MY NEW BOOK, "SPRING AFFAIR"
Hey all! You are seeing it first here! A cover reveal for my new book coming out some time in April called "Spring Affair" painted by the incomparable Paur Richmond! SO excited! It turns woud Paul and I are both huge Alphose Mucha fans and always wish the man had done men instead of (pretty much) just women! I could not be more excited! I LOVE Paul!
March 17, 2014
Happy St. Patrick's Day! by Cardeno C.
Happy Monday! I had big plans to do more song inspirations today but the day job is kicking my butt and I had trouble logging in, so I hope you'll forgive me for visually wishing you a happy St. Patrick's day.
Have a great week.
CCwww.cardenoc.com
Have a great week.
CCwww.cardenoc.com
March 10, 2014
Song Inspirations by Cardeno C. (Tres)
Happy Monday! Many moons ago I wrote a couple of blog posts with song inspirations and last week I was reminded that it's been some time since the last one, so for today's quick post, I'll share a couple more song inspirations. I feel like I shared these before but I can't find the post so please forgive me if this is a repeat.
Now for background, when I'm writing a new book, I usually find a song that I feel represents my characters or the theme of the story or otherwise reminds me of the story. I listen to that song a lot while I'm writing and I let the lyrics inspire my title.
Wake Me Up Inside
Inspiration: "Bring Me To Life" by Evanescence.
The lyrics of that song speak of someone whose core is numb and spirit is sleeping. They need someone to lead them out of that dark place before they come undone; they need to come home. I don't want to give too much away for anyone who hasn't read Wake Me Up Inside, but that is my first paranormal book. It's about shifters and the concept of what true mates need from and mean to each other in that world.
The One Who Saves Me
Inspiration: Wonderwall by Oasis
The One Who Saves Me is a childhood friends to lovers, my favorite type of book. Andrew and Caleb walk along a winding road for twenty years before they end up together. Caleb stands by Andrew through family heartache and relationship traumas that sometimes make him worry the fire in Andrew's heart is out. But no matter what happens, neither one doubts his best friend is there for him. And eventually, they grow up and save themselves from the trials and tribulations of life and end up right where they've been all along: together.
Next Monday, I'll share a couple more books and a couple more song inspirations. Have a wonderful week.
CC
www.cardenoc.com
Now for background, when I'm writing a new book, I usually find a song that I feel represents my characters or the theme of the story or otherwise reminds me of the story. I listen to that song a lot while I'm writing and I let the lyrics inspire my title.
Wake Me Up Inside
Inspiration: "Bring Me To Life" by Evanescence.
The lyrics of that song speak of someone whose core is numb and spirit is sleeping. They need someone to lead them out of that dark place before they come undone; they need to come home. I don't want to give too much away for anyone who hasn't read Wake Me Up Inside, but that is my first paranormal book. It's about shifters and the concept of what true mates need from and mean to each other in that world.The One Who Saves Me
Inspiration: Wonderwall by Oasis
The One Who Saves Me is a childhood friends to lovers, my favorite type of book. Andrew and Caleb walk along a winding road for twenty years before they end up together. Caleb stands by Andrew through family heartache and relationship traumas that sometimes make him worry the fire in Andrew's heart is out. But no matter what happens, neither one doubts his best friend is there for him. And eventually, they grow up and save themselves from the trials and tribulations of life and end up right where they've been all along: together.Next Monday, I'll share a couple more books and a couple more song inspirations. Have a wonderful week.
CC
www.cardenoc.com
March 4, 2014
A-blogging I will go, a-blogging I will go...
Wow. It's been a awhile since I've been here. The cobwebs on my blog day were thick enough to be quilts.
I was asked by the indomitable T.c. Blue ( http://tcblue.wordpress.com/blog/) to participate in AR Moler's blog tour, and of course, I just couldn't say no. T.c. has a way of convincing people to do things - much like the Mafia, except without the drug-running and horse heads.
Usually without.
Snort.
So, here I am. The objective is to answer the following questions, then rope, er...tag three other authors to follow you. That said, I've got three powerhouses following me. March 8th will be B.A. Tortuga (http://batortuga.blogspot.com/). From B.A.'s website:
Texan to the bone and an unrepentant Daddy's Girl, BA Tortuga spends her days with her basset hounds, getting tattooed, texting her sisters, and eating Mexican food. When she's not doing that, she's writing. She spends her days off watching rodeo, knitting and surfing porn sites in the name of research. BA's personal saviors include her partner, Julia Talbot, her best friend, Sean Michael, and coffee. Lots of coffee. Really good coffee. Having written everything from fist-fighting rednecks to hard-core cowboys to werewolves, BA does her damnedest to tell the stories of her heart, which was raised in Northeast Texas, but is feeling the Colorado mountains calling. With books ranging from hard-hitting GLBT romance, to fiery menages, to the most traditional of love stories, BA refuses to be pigeon-holed by anyone but the voices in her head.
On March 15th, we'll be visiting with Julia Talbot (http://juliatalbot.blogspot.com/). From Julia's website:
Julia Talbot lives in the great Southwest, where there is hot and cold running rodeo, cowboys, and everything from meat and potatoes to the best Tex-Mex. A full time author, Julia has been published by Torquere Press, Ellora's Cave, and Changeling Press. She believes that everyone deserves a happy ending, so she writes about love without limits, where boys love boys, girls love girls, and boys and girls get together to get wild, especially when her crazy paranormal characters are involved. Find Julia at @juliatalbot on Twitter, or at www.juliatalbot.com
And on March 22nd, Sean Michael (sean-michael.livejournal.com). Much thanks to all three for taking the time to come play on the blog tour! From Sean's website:
Often referred to as "Space Cowboy" and "Gangsta of Love" while still striving for the moniker of "Maurice," Sean Michael spends his days surfing, smutting, organizing his immense gourd collection and fantasizing about one day retiring on a small secluded island peopled entirely by horseshoe crabs. While collecting vast amounts of vintage gay pulp novels and mood rings, Sean whiles away the hours between dropping the f-bomb and persuing the kama sutra by channeling the long lost spirit of John Wayne and singing along with the soundtrack to "Chicago."
A long-time writer of complicated haiku, currently Sean is attempting to learn the advanced arts of plate spinning and soap carving sex toys.
Barring any of that? He'll stick with writing his stories, thanks, and rubbing pretty bodies together to see if they spark.
Sean's available for interviews, by the way. He can always be talked into, well talking about himself. Just drop him an email here.
Now for the questions, because I'm sure y'all are waiting out there with baited breath, all jittery and sweaty and nail-bite-y because the fate of the universe as we know it will be decided by my answers to these questions.
Or not. Maybe you're just waiting for the next episode of Charles in Charge on Nikelodeon to start, and don't have anything better to do in the meantime. That's okay. It's all good.
1) What am I working on?
I've always got a few things in the works. In fact, I have a folder on my desktop titled "WIP" in which I keep everything I've started but have yet to finish. How many items are in there you ask? Let's put it this way - if it was a brick-and-mortar folder instead of a digital one, it would be heavy enough to be a doorstop.
Some of the items in there are no more than a title, or a first line, or an idea, while some are half-way written, with many, many manuscripts in stages in between.
At the moment I've chosen three to work on. Two are novels, and one is a novella. The first novel is a YA (yes, I write YA under my Dakota Chase pseudonym), a reinventing of sorts of Alice in Wonderland. In this one, Alice's brother, Henry, finds himself in Wonderland where he meets -- and falls for -- the Mad Hatter. There's much whimsy and tomfoolery, and I'm having a blast letting my imagination run wild.
The second is an angel/demon/vampire novel. The heroes are very cool, one being an angel and the other, a demon and both being vampires riding motorcycles. Come on...it doesn't get more badass than that, right? Anyway, in this one vamps are "out" but very much treated like second class citizens by the government. Those who can afford it are forced to drink blood only from government "sanctioned" sources; those who can't afford the cost are forced to find sustenance at seedy places in the underworld, such as skid row. Some vamps want to rebel, and plot against the humans. But within their own ranks are some who only wish to use the rebellion to further their own ends, including the production of a high-end drug called "VD" that's distilled from the ashes of burnt vamps.
The third WIP is a novella for an upcoming anthology with none other than B.A. Tortuga and Julia Talbot, which should be released in time for this year's Authors After Dark convention in August. The working title is "Midnight Rodeo," I believe. My story involves a demon and a psychic who are "patches" for the rodeo (the ones who go in beforehand and square things with local officials). Sorry I can't give out much more information than that at this time, but suffice it to say, the anthology is going to be of the paranormal variety!
2) How does my work differ from others of its genre?
I tend to write things others won't. For example, several years ago, well before the current zombie craze started, I wrote a zombie love story called "As Serious As the Grave." Nobody thought it would sell, but surprise! It did and still does, spawning a second story in the universe called "Lights, Camera, Zombies!"
I've also written "odd" shapeshifters. My favorite was a villain in my "In Their Own Skins" series - the T-Rex shiter, Cain.
I've written satyr porn stars, a book with two heroes who were both over 50 and not chiseled hunks, and so forth and so on.
3) Why do I write what I do?
The true answer? Because I think men are hot. I like the way they think, the dynamics between them when they're in a relationship with each other, they way their bodies work. That may be politically incorrect, but...there you have it. Men are hot, and quite frankly, writing about boobies just doesn't do it for me.
4) How does your writing process work?
Sometimes I start with an idea, sometimes with a title, or a first line. Then I ask the infamous question, "What if?" That's usually all it takes before I'm off to the races.
I need to have silence when I write. I know a lot of writers who create playlists to listen to while they write, and I wish I could be like that, but it just doesn't work for me. I need to hear the voices in my head as they tell me the story. See, when I write, it's like a movie playing in my head. I'm just transcribing what happens.
Well, I think that does it for this blog tour. I had a blast, and thanks to AR Moler for starting the blog tour, and T.c. Blue for asking me!
I was asked by the indomitable T.c. Blue ( http://tcblue.wordpress.com/blog/) to participate in AR Moler's blog tour, and of course, I just couldn't say no. T.c. has a way of convincing people to do things - much like the Mafia, except without the drug-running and horse heads.
Usually without.
Snort.
So, here I am. The objective is to answer the following questions, then rope, er...tag three other authors to follow you. That said, I've got three powerhouses following me. March 8th will be B.A. Tortuga (http://batortuga.blogspot.com/). From B.A.'s website:
Texan to the bone and an unrepentant Daddy's Girl, BA Tortuga spends her days with her basset hounds, getting tattooed, texting her sisters, and eating Mexican food. When she's not doing that, she's writing. She spends her days off watching rodeo, knitting and surfing porn sites in the name of research. BA's personal saviors include her partner, Julia Talbot, her best friend, Sean Michael, and coffee. Lots of coffee. Really good coffee. Having written everything from fist-fighting rednecks to hard-core cowboys to werewolves, BA does her damnedest to tell the stories of her heart, which was raised in Northeast Texas, but is feeling the Colorado mountains calling. With books ranging from hard-hitting GLBT romance, to fiery menages, to the most traditional of love stories, BA refuses to be pigeon-holed by anyone but the voices in her head.
On March 15th, we'll be visiting with Julia Talbot (http://juliatalbot.blogspot.com/). From Julia's website:
Julia Talbot lives in the great Southwest, where there is hot and cold running rodeo, cowboys, and everything from meat and potatoes to the best Tex-Mex. A full time author, Julia has been published by Torquere Press, Ellora's Cave, and Changeling Press. She believes that everyone deserves a happy ending, so she writes about love without limits, where boys love boys, girls love girls, and boys and girls get together to get wild, especially when her crazy paranormal characters are involved. Find Julia at @juliatalbot on Twitter, or at www.juliatalbot.com
And on March 22nd, Sean Michael (sean-michael.livejournal.com). Much thanks to all three for taking the time to come play on the blog tour! From Sean's website:
Often referred to as "Space Cowboy" and "Gangsta of Love" while still striving for the moniker of "Maurice," Sean Michael spends his days surfing, smutting, organizing his immense gourd collection and fantasizing about one day retiring on a small secluded island peopled entirely by horseshoe crabs. While collecting vast amounts of vintage gay pulp novels and mood rings, Sean whiles away the hours between dropping the f-bomb and persuing the kama sutra by channeling the long lost spirit of John Wayne and singing along with the soundtrack to "Chicago."
A long-time writer of complicated haiku, currently Sean is attempting to learn the advanced arts of plate spinning and soap carving sex toys.
Barring any of that? He'll stick with writing his stories, thanks, and rubbing pretty bodies together to see if they spark.
Sean's available for interviews, by the way. He can always be talked into, well talking about himself. Just drop him an email here.
Now for the questions, because I'm sure y'all are waiting out there with baited breath, all jittery and sweaty and nail-bite-y because the fate of the universe as we know it will be decided by my answers to these questions.
Or not. Maybe you're just waiting for the next episode of Charles in Charge on Nikelodeon to start, and don't have anything better to do in the meantime. That's okay. It's all good.
1) What am I working on?
I've always got a few things in the works. In fact, I have a folder on my desktop titled "WIP" in which I keep everything I've started but have yet to finish. How many items are in there you ask? Let's put it this way - if it was a brick-and-mortar folder instead of a digital one, it would be heavy enough to be a doorstop.
Some of the items in there are no more than a title, or a first line, or an idea, while some are half-way written, with many, many manuscripts in stages in between.
At the moment I've chosen three to work on. Two are novels, and one is a novella. The first novel is a YA (yes, I write YA under my Dakota Chase pseudonym), a reinventing of sorts of Alice in Wonderland. In this one, Alice's brother, Henry, finds himself in Wonderland where he meets -- and falls for -- the Mad Hatter. There's much whimsy and tomfoolery, and I'm having a blast letting my imagination run wild.
The second is an angel/demon/vampire novel. The heroes are very cool, one being an angel and the other, a demon and both being vampires riding motorcycles. Come on...it doesn't get more badass than that, right? Anyway, in this one vamps are "out" but very much treated like second class citizens by the government. Those who can afford it are forced to drink blood only from government "sanctioned" sources; those who can't afford the cost are forced to find sustenance at seedy places in the underworld, such as skid row. Some vamps want to rebel, and plot against the humans. But within their own ranks are some who only wish to use the rebellion to further their own ends, including the production of a high-end drug called "VD" that's distilled from the ashes of burnt vamps.
The third WIP is a novella for an upcoming anthology with none other than B.A. Tortuga and Julia Talbot, which should be released in time for this year's Authors After Dark convention in August. The working title is "Midnight Rodeo," I believe. My story involves a demon and a psychic who are "patches" for the rodeo (the ones who go in beforehand and square things with local officials). Sorry I can't give out much more information than that at this time, but suffice it to say, the anthology is going to be of the paranormal variety!
2) How does my work differ from others of its genre?
I tend to write things others won't. For example, several years ago, well before the current zombie craze started, I wrote a zombie love story called "As Serious As the Grave." Nobody thought it would sell, but surprise! It did and still does, spawning a second story in the universe called "Lights, Camera, Zombies!"
I've also written "odd" shapeshifters. My favorite was a villain in my "In Their Own Skins" series - the T-Rex shiter, Cain.
I've written satyr porn stars, a book with two heroes who were both over 50 and not chiseled hunks, and so forth and so on.
3) Why do I write what I do?
The true answer? Because I think men are hot. I like the way they think, the dynamics between them when they're in a relationship with each other, they way their bodies work. That may be politically incorrect, but...there you have it. Men are hot, and quite frankly, writing about boobies just doesn't do it for me.
4) How does your writing process work?
Sometimes I start with an idea, sometimes with a title, or a first line. Then I ask the infamous question, "What if?" That's usually all it takes before I'm off to the races.
I need to have silence when I write. I know a lot of writers who create playlists to listen to while they write, and I wish I could be like that, but it just doesn't work for me. I need to hear the voices in my head as they tell me the story. See, when I write, it's like a movie playing in my head. I'm just transcribing what happens.
Well, I think that does it for this blog tour. I had a blast, and thanks to AR Moler for starting the blog tour, and T.c. Blue for asking me!
March 3, 2014
February by Cardeno C.
Happy Monday! We said goodbye to February so it's time for my monthly writing recap blog post.
Walk with Me – the last Home series book - was released on February 7th. Mary Calmes and I finished the editing process on Control and got an amazing cover from Reese Dante. The book is scheduled for release on April 18th.I finished the editing process on Perfect Imperfections, my standalone novel scheduled for release May 5th. I got a contract for the short novella I wrote as part of Dreamspinner’s summer Mended Daily Dose. The theme for this one is hurt-comfort. My story is a paranormal (shifters) called All of Me. It’ll be available for individual sale on June 1st.I got a contract for In Your Eyes, the next Mates book. It’s scheduled for release in July.Have a great week.
CC
www.cardenoc.com
Walk with Me – the last Home series book - was released on February 7th. Mary Calmes and I finished the editing process on Control and got an amazing cover from Reese Dante. The book is scheduled for release on April 18th.I finished the editing process on Perfect Imperfections, my standalone novel scheduled for release May 5th. I got a contract for the short novella I wrote as part of Dreamspinner’s summer Mended Daily Dose. The theme for this one is hurt-comfort. My story is a paranormal (shifters) called All of Me. It’ll be available for individual sale on June 1st.I got a contract for In Your Eyes, the next Mates book. It’s scheduled for release in July.Have a great week.CC
www.cardenoc.com
February 24, 2014
Joyfully Jay's Men in Uniform Week & Mrs. Condit's Giveaways
Happy Monday! Today I have a couple of links to share where you can win books.
Joyfully Jay is doing a week dedicated to Men in Uniform. There will be all sorts of interesting reviews and TONS of giveaways (including Something in the Way He Needs and Where He Ends and I Begin). Check it out here.
Mrs. Condit has five books (including Walk with Me) and a gift card up for grabs here.
Have a great week. I hope you win a book!
CC
www.cardenoc.com
Joyfully Jay is doing a week dedicated to Men in Uniform. There will be all sorts of interesting reviews and TONS of giveaways (including Something in the Way He Needs and Where He Ends and I Begin). Check it out here.Mrs. Condit has five books (including Walk with Me) and a gift card up for grabs here.
Have a great week. I hope you win a book!CC
www.cardenoc.com
February 17, 2014
Pinterest by Cardeno C.
Happy Monday! I have a quick blog post today because I'm about to embark on a roadtrip.
I joined Pinterest a bit ago and one of my main reasons was to create a board where readers could pin images that reminded them of my characters. I learned that in order to do this, I need to invite a reader to that board, so please consider this my open call.
If you're on pinterest and have pictures you want to share on my board, let me know and I'll send you an invite. I'd love to see how you see my characters.
Oh, and I'm giving away a copy of a Home series book (winner's choice) here.
Have a great week.
CC
www.cardenoc.com
I joined Pinterest a bit ago and one of my main reasons was to create a board where readers could pin images that reminded them of my characters. I learned that in order to do this, I need to invite a reader to that board, so please consider this my open call.
If you're on pinterest and have pictures you want to share on my board, let me know and I'll send you an invite. I'd love to see how you see my characters.
Oh, and I'm giving away a copy of a Home series book (winner's choice) here.
Have a great week.
CC
www.cardenoc.com
February 13, 2014
Happy Valentine's Day!
It's here! My new book! And it is a Valentine's Day story just in time for Valentine's Day!
Here's the blurb:
After his divorce, Steve Manchester came out so he could be himself and find love with another man. But as it turns out, the only man he really wants is his sweet, intelligent, and gorgeous best friend Burgess Cameron. Burgess, however, wants to keep the relationship platonic. When Steve can no longer stand the unrequited love, he decides to move to San Francisco to start a new life. But before he leaves, Burgess invites him to a Valentine’s Day dance, where Cupid may have other plans for them both!
I love this story and I hope you will too!
Now I will warn anyone who has read everything I've ever written that this is a second edition. Silver Publishing had an anthology called "Never Say Never." That book went out of print, and that made me sad. Escpecially since it ties in with all my other stories and several characters from my other books make cameo appearances.
So Dreamspinner found out it was available and wanted it and I freshened it up, and it was re-edited and some mistakes were fixed and now it is back, in a new and improved second edition!
Find it from Dreamspinner Press right here: http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/store/product_info.php?products_id=4683&cPath=276
Signing off now...but I want to say this! I hope you have a wonderful Valentine's Day!
Love and Light!
BG Thomas
February 10, 2014
Monday Excerpt by Cardeno C.
Happy Monday. In my ever increasing quest to find blog topics (Worst Blogger Ever, I know), I thought of maybe the occasional excerpt from a book. What do you think? Is it considered a blogging offense to use something I've already written? In case that's allowed, I'm sharing an excerpt from Walk with Me below.
Also, I'll be taking over Dreamspinner's FB page on Saturday, February 15th at 12-1 EST/9-10 PST. If you're around, I hope you'll join me so I don't hear crickets. Have a great week.
EXCERPT – WALK WITH ME BY CARDENO C.
THE PIZZA place was crazy busy, so they were behind in their orders. That meant I got to Seth’s apartment at quarter after nine. Not exactly something that would be categorized as late, but had things gone according to my schedule, I would have been sitting on his front mat, panting when he got home. Taking a chance that the ceremony ended on time, I knocked on his door. “Come in,” he said. At least I thought that was what he said. Mostly, I just heard a muffled sound, but the knowledge that he was behind the door was all I needed to forge ahead. I grasped the doorknob, turned it, and barged inside with a pizza and a smile. The smile quickly turned into a furrowed brow when I saw Seth lying facedown on the couch. “Seth?” “Umph.” “Uh, is everything okay?” “Mmm-hmm.” Okay, that sounded like a verbal yes to everything being okay, but his nonverbal communication indicated a different answer. “Umm, shouldn’t you take your suit off before you get wrinkled?” There. That was practical. He said something that sounded like a yes, but I had a hard time understanding him because he was mumbling into the couch cushion. I set the pizza box on the counter and turned back to the couch. That was when I noticed something on the floor next to it. I walked over, picked it up, and asked, “Uh, what is this?” A muffled sound was his response. “Did you say party hat? Why would they have—” He said, “No,” and then something else, but I had no idea what. “I can’t understand you when you talk into the furniture,” I said. “Plus you probably can’t breathe that way. Flip over.” Seth turned his head to the side and sighed loudly. “Safari hat.” I looked at the hat, and sure enough it was one of those tan mesh round hats with black straps over the sides. Of course the answer didn’t really cover all aspects of my question. “Why is there a safari hat here?” “Theme wedding,” he said tiredly. “Again? You’re kidding.” “No, I’m afraid I’m not. They’re going on an African safari for their honeymoon, and at the last minute, they decided it’d be fun to get started early, so they brought that hat and asked me to wear it instead of a kippah.” “They asked you to wear this hat while you officiated their wedding?” “Uh-huh.” “And you did it?” I asked in disbelief.“Well, technically my head was covered and the hat is round, showing that God is above us and all around us and….” He sighed again, sounding defeated. “Yes, I wore the hat.” “You’re way too nice.” I sat on the edge of the couch. “My dad would have told them to pound sand.” “No, he wouldn’t.” “Uh, yeah, he totally would.” Seth sat up and dropped his head against the back of the couch. “Well, maybe if your dad had been there, they wouldn’t have lost the rings.” I scooted closer to him. “They lost their wedding rings?” He nodded. “Do I want to know?” I asked hesitantly. “No.” He was probably right, but I was too curious for my own good. “Tell me anyway.” “The happy couple owns a ridgeback.” “What’s a ridgeback?” “Rhodesian ridgeback. It’s big African hunting dog. Their dog matched their honeymoon, so, of course, they decided he was perfect for the wedding theme.” “Oh no.” “Oh yes.” Seth looked at me and shook his head. “They had to put the dog in the wedding. Had to.” “Did it poop on the aisle like the horses?” I asked. “Don’t I wish,” Seth said. I was afraid to ask, but I did anyway. “What’s worse than a shitty aisle?” “They decided to make the dog the ring bearer.” That didn’t sound so bad. I folded my leg underneath me and twisted sideways so my torso was facing him. There was something on his dark suit, discoloration or dirt or something. I peered it at as I asked my next question. “Uh, okay, so they attached the rings to his collar or something?” Seth nodded. “Yup. They put the rings in a bag, tied the bag to the collar, and had a friend hold the dog at the end of the aisle. Then, at just the right moment, they called for the dog. It would have worked fine but—” He grimaced and bit his lip. I wanted to lick it to soothe the sting. “Did I mention the wedding was outside?” “No.” He drew in a deep breath and mirrored my pose. “It was at the preserve.” We were close enough to each other that if I leaned forward just a couple of inches, I could have kissed him. Instead, I reached for one of the marks on his suit to see if I could brush it off. “You don’t want to touch that,” he said, grabbing my wrist firmly but gently. “There were squirrels.” “Oh God,” I said. Outdoor wedding plus dog plus squirrels equaled a disaster in the making. I looked at his suit and then back up at his face. “What happened?” “Randy was running—” “Randy?” “The ridgeback. Randy the Rhodesian ridgeback was running toward the bride and groom, and then he saw a squirrel.” “Oh no. Did he go after the squirrel?” “Yes, but remember, we were in a preserve. There were lots of squirrels, and they’re used to being fed not hunted, so their reflexes were slow.” Seth looked a little green. “At least they seemed slow when the dog….” He shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut. “There was so much blood.” “That’s what’s smeared on your suit?” He nodded. I officially lost my appetite. “And the rings?” I asked once I got my gag reflex under control. “We don’t know. The bag must have fallen off the dog’s collar at some point. But between the shrubs and all the carnage, nobody was able to find it.” After several minutes of silence, I patted his shoulder. “Well, I think you’ve learned a valuable lesson.” “Wear rubber boots to weddings?” he asked. “I was thinking more along the line of no more animals in weddings.” He furrowed his brow in thought. “That’s a good idea.” With the wedding carnage discussion coming to a close, I refocused on where I was—in Seth’s apartment, on his couch, just the two of us. I had fantasized about all sorts of situations that started out just like that and ended with both us naked and covered in jizz. Before those memories left me with an obvious hard-on, I made myself think about something else. “So, uh.” I darted my head around his apartment and my gaze landed on the pizza box. “Are you hungry? I brought pizza.” Seth groaned and closed his eyes. “I don’t think I’ll be able to eat anything with red sauce for a long time.” I couldn’t blame him, but without food to keep us occupied, I wasn’t sure what to do. I knew what I wanted to do, but that wasn’t an option either. I twisted my fingers together nervously and hoped Seth wouldn’t tell me he was too tired to hang out. It was our last night together before I had to go back to school, and I wouldn’t see him again until summer break. I was nowhere near ready to say good-bye. “Do you want to play cards?” I said out of nowhere. “Cards?” He looked at me in confusion. “Yeah, cards.” I smirked and waggled my eyebrows. “Isn’t that what old men like to do on Saturday nights?” “Very funny. I don’t play cards.” “Are you saying you don’t own a deck of cards?” “Of course I do.” “Well, then, bring ’em out. Unless you’re worried I’ll embarrass you,” I challenged. Seth squinted at me. “What’re we playing?” Relieved that my idea of an alternative plan worked, I said, “Whatever you want. Your house, your choice.” “Okay.” He jumped up and hustled toward his bedroom. “I’ll get out of this suit, take a super quick shower, and then we can play gin rummy.” When I realized he wasn’t joking, I started laughing hysterically. “What?” he shouted from his bedroom. “Why’re you laughing?” “No reason,” I said breathlessly. Then I paused for a few beats and quietly added, “Old man.” “I heard that!”
I cracked up all over again.
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Also, I'll be taking over Dreamspinner's FB page on Saturday, February 15th at 12-1 EST/9-10 PST. If you're around, I hope you'll join me so I don't hear crickets. Have a great week.
EXCERPT – WALK WITH ME BY CARDENO C.
THE PIZZA place was crazy busy, so they were behind in their orders. That meant I got to Seth’s apartment at quarter after nine. Not exactly something that would be categorized as late, but had things gone according to my schedule, I would have been sitting on his front mat, panting when he got home. Taking a chance that the ceremony ended on time, I knocked on his door. “Come in,” he said. At least I thought that was what he said. Mostly, I just heard a muffled sound, but the knowledge that he was behind the door was all I needed to forge ahead. I grasped the doorknob, turned it, and barged inside with a pizza and a smile. The smile quickly turned into a furrowed brow when I saw Seth lying facedown on the couch. “Seth?” “Umph.” “Uh, is everything okay?” “Mmm-hmm.” Okay, that sounded like a verbal yes to everything being okay, but his nonverbal communication indicated a different answer. “Umm, shouldn’t you take your suit off before you get wrinkled?” There. That was practical. He said something that sounded like a yes, but I had a hard time understanding him because he was mumbling into the couch cushion. I set the pizza box on the counter and turned back to the couch. That was when I noticed something on the floor next to it. I walked over, picked it up, and asked, “Uh, what is this?” A muffled sound was his response. “Did you say party hat? Why would they have—” He said, “No,” and then something else, but I had no idea what. “I can’t understand you when you talk into the furniture,” I said. “Plus you probably can’t breathe that way. Flip over.” Seth turned his head to the side and sighed loudly. “Safari hat.” I looked at the hat, and sure enough it was one of those tan mesh round hats with black straps over the sides. Of course the answer didn’t really cover all aspects of my question. “Why is there a safari hat here?” “Theme wedding,” he said tiredly. “Again? You’re kidding.” “No, I’m afraid I’m not. They’re going on an African safari for their honeymoon, and at the last minute, they decided it’d be fun to get started early, so they brought that hat and asked me to wear it instead of a kippah.” “They asked you to wear this hat while you officiated their wedding?” “Uh-huh.” “And you did it?” I asked in disbelief.“Well, technically my head was covered and the hat is round, showing that God is above us and all around us and….” He sighed again, sounding defeated. “Yes, I wore the hat.” “You’re way too nice.” I sat on the edge of the couch. “My dad would have told them to pound sand.” “No, he wouldn’t.” “Uh, yeah, he totally would.” Seth sat up and dropped his head against the back of the couch. “Well, maybe if your dad had been there, they wouldn’t have lost the rings.” I scooted closer to him. “They lost their wedding rings?” He nodded. “Do I want to know?” I asked hesitantly. “No.” He was probably right, but I was too curious for my own good. “Tell me anyway.” “The happy couple owns a ridgeback.” “What’s a ridgeback?” “Rhodesian ridgeback. It’s big African hunting dog. Their dog matched their honeymoon, so, of course, they decided he was perfect for the wedding theme.” “Oh no.” “Oh yes.” Seth looked at me and shook his head. “They had to put the dog in the wedding. Had to.” “Did it poop on the aisle like the horses?” I asked. “Don’t I wish,” Seth said. I was afraid to ask, but I did anyway. “What’s worse than a shitty aisle?” “They decided to make the dog the ring bearer.” That didn’t sound so bad. I folded my leg underneath me and twisted sideways so my torso was facing him. There was something on his dark suit, discoloration or dirt or something. I peered it at as I asked my next question. “Uh, okay, so they attached the rings to his collar or something?” Seth nodded. “Yup. They put the rings in a bag, tied the bag to the collar, and had a friend hold the dog at the end of the aisle. Then, at just the right moment, they called for the dog. It would have worked fine but—” He grimaced and bit his lip. I wanted to lick it to soothe the sting. “Did I mention the wedding was outside?” “No.” He drew in a deep breath and mirrored my pose. “It was at the preserve.” We were close enough to each other that if I leaned forward just a couple of inches, I could have kissed him. Instead, I reached for one of the marks on his suit to see if I could brush it off. “You don’t want to touch that,” he said, grabbing my wrist firmly but gently. “There were squirrels.” “Oh God,” I said. Outdoor wedding plus dog plus squirrels equaled a disaster in the making. I looked at his suit and then back up at his face. “What happened?” “Randy was running—” “Randy?” “The ridgeback. Randy the Rhodesian ridgeback was running toward the bride and groom, and then he saw a squirrel.” “Oh no. Did he go after the squirrel?” “Yes, but remember, we were in a preserve. There were lots of squirrels, and they’re used to being fed not hunted, so their reflexes were slow.” Seth looked a little green. “At least they seemed slow when the dog….” He shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut. “There was so much blood.” “That’s what’s smeared on your suit?” He nodded. I officially lost my appetite. “And the rings?” I asked once I got my gag reflex under control. “We don’t know. The bag must have fallen off the dog’s collar at some point. But between the shrubs and all the carnage, nobody was able to find it.” After several minutes of silence, I patted his shoulder. “Well, I think you’ve learned a valuable lesson.” “Wear rubber boots to weddings?” he asked. “I was thinking more along the line of no more animals in weddings.” He furrowed his brow in thought. “That’s a good idea.” With the wedding carnage discussion coming to a close, I refocused on where I was—in Seth’s apartment, on his couch, just the two of us. I had fantasized about all sorts of situations that started out just like that and ended with both us naked and covered in jizz. Before those memories left me with an obvious hard-on, I made myself think about something else. “So, uh.” I darted my head around his apartment and my gaze landed on the pizza box. “Are you hungry? I brought pizza.” Seth groaned and closed his eyes. “I don’t think I’ll be able to eat anything with red sauce for a long time.” I couldn’t blame him, but without food to keep us occupied, I wasn’t sure what to do. I knew what I wanted to do, but that wasn’t an option either. I twisted my fingers together nervously and hoped Seth wouldn’t tell me he was too tired to hang out. It was our last night together before I had to go back to school, and I wouldn’t see him again until summer break. I was nowhere near ready to say good-bye. “Do you want to play cards?” I said out of nowhere. “Cards?” He looked at me in confusion. “Yeah, cards.” I smirked and waggled my eyebrows. “Isn’t that what old men like to do on Saturday nights?” “Very funny. I don’t play cards.” “Are you saying you don’t own a deck of cards?” “Of course I do.” “Well, then, bring ’em out. Unless you’re worried I’ll embarrass you,” I challenged. Seth squinted at me. “What’re we playing?” Relieved that my idea of an alternative plan worked, I said, “Whatever you want. Your house, your choice.” “Okay.” He jumped up and hustled toward his bedroom. “I’ll get out of this suit, take a super quick shower, and then we can play gin rummy.” When I realized he wasn’t joking, I started laughing hysterically. “What?” he shouted from his bedroom. “Why’re you laughing?” “No reason,” I said breathlessly. Then I paused for a few beats and quietly added, “Old man.” “I heard that!” I cracked up all over again.
www.cardenoc.com
