Gillian Polack's Blog, page 12
January 26, 2016
fandom and friends and inclusion
Right now, a lot of people are talking about inclusion/exclusion at SF cons. This is an important conversation and it needs to be had.
We tend to be very aware when we're the people who are excluded. My first convention was appalling and if it hadn't been for Maxine McArthur, I probably would not have made it to my second and discovered how great they can be. Maxine saw me waiting for something, by myself and rather uncomfortable, and she stopped to chat. She had no idea who I was. She showed me she listened and cared, even though we'd never met before. I didn't feel less embarrassed about my first con (I suspect I never shall, for it was awkward) but I was willing to try again, and I've never looked back.
One thing I learned from Maxine is to make new friends at cons. Some of these friends will be friends-for-cons and some will be friends outside. All this is obvious. If I haven't made new friends at a convention then it's either the wrong convention for me (and I need to find out why) or I've been sticking with a single group the whole time. I was trying to explain this to Aussie friends at FantasyCon. It apparently looked as if I was ignoring most of my Australian friends, except for the time I joined them for dessert and for the afternoon I spent with Glenda - but most of the Australians live near me and are welcome to come over and be fed, or we can do fun activities together - it's a choice thing. If we haven't seen each other in a while, we really should remedy it locally and not on the other side of the world. I don't have the same choice to see any of the rather wonderful new friends I met at FantasyCon, because you all live in the UK. You, too, may drop over and be fed, of course, but it's not so easy as someone who lives locally. (Glenda, for the record, lives 3700 kms away, so she was a special case in York.)
Right now there are groups of fans in various places talking about this, following the conversation begun by Kameron Hurley. In one of the various locations this chat has been happening, there was an odd phenomenon. Fans who have a record of excluding others were complaining about being excluded. They'd been excluded themselves (which was bad) and have friends now, and so are fine (which is good). Their friends have unintentionally formed an exclusive clique. Sometimes cliques are important - they're small groups of friends who need each other and have a better convention because they hang out together.
I have other issues with cliques, for the prevalence of cliques in Australian fandom really explains a lot about our SF scene. Work out who knows whom and how well and you have explanations for many, many things. One issue I don't have is groups of friends meeting each other and being safe and happy and unintentionally excluding others. I especially don't have a problem because the first such clique I discovered in fandom were ensuring their physical safety by dining together.
If a group of friends is closed for safety or because they really aren't the sort of people who get happiness from new friends, I don't have an issue. It's a problem for the concom if there are too many of these groups, which is a different matter, though not unrelated, for it means the whole convention is closed to anyone not part of the regular mob. My concern is when a closed group claims to be open. In modelling closed behaviour but claiming to be modelling open, they're actually making the excluded more aware of the exclusion.
There is nothing wrong with friends hanging out with friends. It's nicer if they can be inclusive, but not all groups can, for a good many reasons. Those of us who like meeting new people are in a position of great advantage in this respect. However, groups that exclude because they haven't thought to include or because they haven't checked their body language are a different matter. I've met them too often. I want to be sarcastic in their presence.
For me, the wonder of SF conventions is their tremendous mix of people. This means we are always going to have small groups who need their space. The trick is to make sure that this space doesn't define the convention. One thing that SF fans are notable for is that we are varied in our personalities and our needs : it's about all of us, not about the select few.
So I fully agree that, yes, we should be inclusive at cons. One of the great joys of cons is meeting awesome people, and the shy people lingering on the fringe are (in my experience) such people. And there are places for small closed groups. What there isn't a place for is jumping on the bandwagon for one group and assuming that we're all comfortable with the same behaviour. The very richness and diversity of fandom means that we need to know ourselves and what we do, and not jump on every behavioral bandwagon.
Also, please remember that I am (despite appearances) somewhat shy. I love to talk to new people at cons, though (it's one of the reasons I go), so send them my way. If you know a con newbie and you know I'll be at a con, say "Gillian - chat with her." I may not be at the bar, for people don't tend to open up circles for me in Australia and I got tired of the whole song and dance, but not all cons revolve around bars. Suggest your friend collar me as I come out of a panel and ask if I'm free for coffee. If they will enjoy stirring, suggest they look at me accusingly and say "I was told you like to meet interesting people. I'm fabulously fascinating."
I'll be at Natcon in Brisbane in March - I am looking forward to all my old friends and all my friends-to-be and in making random acquaintances, too.
PS I fixed some typos. I blame the weather for the typos, just as I do for today's aches and pains. I do not blame the weather for me have 45 index entries to go.
We tend to be very aware when we're the people who are excluded. My first convention was appalling and if it hadn't been for Maxine McArthur, I probably would not have made it to my second and discovered how great they can be. Maxine saw me waiting for something, by myself and rather uncomfortable, and she stopped to chat. She had no idea who I was. She showed me she listened and cared, even though we'd never met before. I didn't feel less embarrassed about my first con (I suspect I never shall, for it was awkward) but I was willing to try again, and I've never looked back.
One thing I learned from Maxine is to make new friends at cons. Some of these friends will be friends-for-cons and some will be friends outside. All this is obvious. If I haven't made new friends at a convention then it's either the wrong convention for me (and I need to find out why) or I've been sticking with a single group the whole time. I was trying to explain this to Aussie friends at FantasyCon. It apparently looked as if I was ignoring most of my Australian friends, except for the time I joined them for dessert and for the afternoon I spent with Glenda - but most of the Australians live near me and are welcome to come over and be fed, or we can do fun activities together - it's a choice thing. If we haven't seen each other in a while, we really should remedy it locally and not on the other side of the world. I don't have the same choice to see any of the rather wonderful new friends I met at FantasyCon, because you all live in the UK. You, too, may drop over and be fed, of course, but it's not so easy as someone who lives locally. (Glenda, for the record, lives 3700 kms away, so she was a special case in York.)
Right now there are groups of fans in various places talking about this, following the conversation begun by Kameron Hurley. In one of the various locations this chat has been happening, there was an odd phenomenon. Fans who have a record of excluding others were complaining about being excluded. They'd been excluded themselves (which was bad) and have friends now, and so are fine (which is good). Their friends have unintentionally formed an exclusive clique. Sometimes cliques are important - they're small groups of friends who need each other and have a better convention because they hang out together.
I have other issues with cliques, for the prevalence of cliques in Australian fandom really explains a lot about our SF scene. Work out who knows whom and how well and you have explanations for many, many things. One issue I don't have is groups of friends meeting each other and being safe and happy and unintentionally excluding others. I especially don't have a problem because the first such clique I discovered in fandom were ensuring their physical safety by dining together.
If a group of friends is closed for safety or because they really aren't the sort of people who get happiness from new friends, I don't have an issue. It's a problem for the concom if there are too many of these groups, which is a different matter, though not unrelated, for it means the whole convention is closed to anyone not part of the regular mob. My concern is when a closed group claims to be open. In modelling closed behaviour but claiming to be modelling open, they're actually making the excluded more aware of the exclusion.
There is nothing wrong with friends hanging out with friends. It's nicer if they can be inclusive, but not all groups can, for a good many reasons. Those of us who like meeting new people are in a position of great advantage in this respect. However, groups that exclude because they haven't thought to include or because they haven't checked their body language are a different matter. I've met them too often. I want to be sarcastic in their presence.
For me, the wonder of SF conventions is their tremendous mix of people. This means we are always going to have small groups who need their space. The trick is to make sure that this space doesn't define the convention. One thing that SF fans are notable for is that we are varied in our personalities and our needs : it's about all of us, not about the select few.
So I fully agree that, yes, we should be inclusive at cons. One of the great joys of cons is meeting awesome people, and the shy people lingering on the fringe are (in my experience) such people. And there are places for small closed groups. What there isn't a place for is jumping on the bandwagon for one group and assuming that we're all comfortable with the same behaviour. The very richness and diversity of fandom means that we need to know ourselves and what we do, and not jump on every behavioral bandwagon.
Also, please remember that I am (despite appearances) somewhat shy. I love to talk to new people at cons, though (it's one of the reasons I go), so send them my way. If you know a con newbie and you know I'll be at a con, say "Gillian - chat with her." I may not be at the bar, for people don't tend to open up circles for me in Australia and I got tired of the whole song and dance, but not all cons revolve around bars. Suggest your friend collar me as I come out of a panel and ask if I'm free for coffee. If they will enjoy stirring, suggest they look at me accusingly and say "I was told you like to meet interesting people. I'm fabulously fascinating."
I'll be at Natcon in Brisbane in March - I am looking forward to all my old friends and all my friends-to-be and in making random acquaintances, too.
PS I fixed some typos. I blame the weather for the typos, just as I do for today's aches and pains. I do not blame the weather for me have 45 index entries to go.
January 25, 2016
gillpolack @ 2016-01-26T12:59:00
It's Australia Day or Survival Day or the Day of Many Names and Much Guilt. I was going to go the National Museum and spend a few hours considering all this, but my friends are busy, the weather is unreliable, the buses are on a Sunday timetable, so I'm pretty much stuck at home. I'm in a lot less pain than during this last week, but it's not little enough to tempt fate by walking to the more-distant bus stop (the one with more regular buses) when it may rain on me later. I used not be worried about these things, because I used to not have to deal with these things. I used to be someone who walked five miles and danced for three hours, all in a day's activity. Life changes.
One thing I'm supremely glad about is that the back pain doesn't affect my teaching or my writing. The ever-incoming thunderstorms mean that proofreading is slow, but I'm almost finished that, in plenty of time. I just have to get the document containing my changes into the correct format for my publisher Normally I do this before I begin, but in this case the particular publisher sent me three different documents containing separated pieces of advice and there's one I didn't realise contained the critical instructions until too late.
Since I need cheering up because of some of last week (and because I really, really wanted to get to the Museum between 10 and 2 - there are interesting things happening) I decided to do a tally of what I've done so far in 2016. There's a reason for this tally. A group of local writers have (unintentionally - mainly by neglect) cause me to feel incompetent. I've decided life's too short to feel incompetent if one is not actually incompetent.
By this you know that, despite seeing friends over my long weekend, I'm very grumpy. Someone stomped on me and I do not like it.
So.. the question of my competence...
I put my list of things to do in January up early (I write my monthly plans on big paper and it goes on the back of my door), because it was going to be a big month. I've got through all the 17th century primary sources except for five (hundreds of documents, done - yay!) and I've worked through the start (first 30) of my secondary sources. My feel for the 17th century is coming along apace. I've done all but 2 days of the admin, which includes applying for the very few jobs that are out there. I want full-time employment so very much - this is one of several reasons I'm grumpy. Most people didn't follow up on my admin stuff, even though I did it all in time and to form. I've chased all these down now, and know what's happening, more or less. The worst of these were some teaching things and a job I was interviewed for last year. I finally found out about the latter (I missed it, but not through anything I did - they had several perfect candidates) and I now have extra paperwork to do for the former, because of time slippage. That will be done this week. Day after tomorrow is my admin day, when I catch up on all these things.
I've almost done with the proofreading for the monograph, and I've got my complete list of key words for the index. This means three very slow days while I complete all this. The book will be done by the end of the week. And, all going well, the edits for my next novel will also be done by then, or by the end of the first week of term if they go slightly less well.
I've written an article or three, started drafting a fourth and fifth, and done the edits for three more. One of these is for a journal I've wanted to appear in for years, so I'm very happy about that one.
I've read about a dozen books for fun and sorted out that most children's and YA fiction in Australia that has Jewish protagonists is either Shoah-related or about ultra-Orthodox Jews (this hunt was inspired by a question on FB by
fjm
). According to my calculations, work with semi-realistic Jewish characters is thin on the ground and work that contains Jews who come from a more normative background is less than 10% of that. If anyone wanted to publish a YA book with a Jewish teen who goes to a state school, keeps (mostly) kosher and doesn't want a closeted or gated future I think I would be willing to write one. Secret Jewish Women's Business is coming out soon (soon! it's the novel currently being edited by its editor, and then I get to review those edits) and it helped get me the understanding of how a book like this can be written. And... I think I'd make it fantasy. And I would have to consult with N, because she's at school right now and could update me on the nature of school right now and on being a minority at school right now. (I know a bunch of teachers, but they would give entirely the wrong viewpoint. Also, one of the most "I am good with minorities" bigots I know is a teacher, oddly enough. I hate to think of what messages they deliver in class.) And by this you know that the limited range of Australian books with Jewish characters really worries me, especially in this difficult decade.
I've done other stuff, but I can't remember! This would be because I keep dwelling on being 10,000 words behind on the novel that's not contracted, that I didn't intend to write... and that for months I've been ready for a writing retreat with other writers (even a simple day of one) but there is none. I'm not alone, but my writing is. That would be one major reason why I feel incompetent. This will improve when teaching starts, for I'll get to see my students every week. I'm a family person who (by happenstance) has ended up living alone. It always shows at this time of year.
I still don't know if I'm competent. But I've read more books in a month than I read in a bad year, and I've written many words and edited and proofed many more words. I'm very efficient, at the least.
One thing I'm supremely glad about is that the back pain doesn't affect my teaching or my writing. The ever-incoming thunderstorms mean that proofreading is slow, but I'm almost finished that, in plenty of time. I just have to get the document containing my changes into the correct format for my publisher Normally I do this before I begin, but in this case the particular publisher sent me three different documents containing separated pieces of advice and there's one I didn't realise contained the critical instructions until too late.
Since I need cheering up because of some of last week (and because I really, really wanted to get to the Museum between 10 and 2 - there are interesting things happening) I decided to do a tally of what I've done so far in 2016. There's a reason for this tally. A group of local writers have (unintentionally - mainly by neglect) cause me to feel incompetent. I've decided life's too short to feel incompetent if one is not actually incompetent.
By this you know that, despite seeing friends over my long weekend, I'm very grumpy. Someone stomped on me and I do not like it.
So.. the question of my competence...
I put my list of things to do in January up early (I write my monthly plans on big paper and it goes on the back of my door), because it was going to be a big month. I've got through all the 17th century primary sources except for five (hundreds of documents, done - yay!) and I've worked through the start (first 30) of my secondary sources. My feel for the 17th century is coming along apace. I've done all but 2 days of the admin, which includes applying for the very few jobs that are out there. I want full-time employment so very much - this is one of several reasons I'm grumpy. Most people didn't follow up on my admin stuff, even though I did it all in time and to form. I've chased all these down now, and know what's happening, more or less. The worst of these were some teaching things and a job I was interviewed for last year. I finally found out about the latter (I missed it, but not through anything I did - they had several perfect candidates) and I now have extra paperwork to do for the former, because of time slippage. That will be done this week. Day after tomorrow is my admin day, when I catch up on all these things.
I've almost done with the proofreading for the monograph, and I've got my complete list of key words for the index. This means three very slow days while I complete all this. The book will be done by the end of the week. And, all going well, the edits for my next novel will also be done by then, or by the end of the first week of term if they go slightly less well.
I've written an article or three, started drafting a fourth and fifth, and done the edits for three more. One of these is for a journal I've wanted to appear in for years, so I'm very happy about that one.
I've read about a dozen books for fun and sorted out that most children's and YA fiction in Australia that has Jewish protagonists is either Shoah-related or about ultra-Orthodox Jews (this hunt was inspired by a question on FB by
fjm
). According to my calculations, work with semi-realistic Jewish characters is thin on the ground and work that contains Jews who come from a more normative background is less than 10% of that. If anyone wanted to publish a YA book with a Jewish teen who goes to a state school, keeps (mostly) kosher and doesn't want a closeted or gated future I think I would be willing to write one. Secret Jewish Women's Business is coming out soon (soon! it's the novel currently being edited by its editor, and then I get to review those edits) and it helped get me the understanding of how a book like this can be written. And... I think I'd make it fantasy. And I would have to consult with N, because she's at school right now and could update me on the nature of school right now and on being a minority at school right now. (I know a bunch of teachers, but they would give entirely the wrong viewpoint. Also, one of the most "I am good with minorities" bigots I know is a teacher, oddly enough. I hate to think of what messages they deliver in class.) And by this you know that the limited range of Australian books with Jewish characters really worries me, especially in this difficult decade.I've done other stuff, but I can't remember! This would be because I keep dwelling on being 10,000 words behind on the novel that's not contracted, that I didn't intend to write... and that for months I've been ready for a writing retreat with other writers (even a simple day of one) but there is none. I'm not alone, but my writing is. That would be one major reason why I feel incompetent. This will improve when teaching starts, for I'll get to see my students every week. I'm a family person who (by happenstance) has ended up living alone. It always shows at this time of year.
I still don't know if I'm competent. But I've read more books in a month than I read in a bad year, and I've written many words and edited and proofed many more words. I'm very efficient, at the least.
January 23, 2016
Childhood books
I've just had a beautifully long conversation with my mother. We talked through a whole shelf of books from my childhood. It helped me discover some critical things about myself.
1. I read Little Golden Books at the same time as Thomas Hardy, because I read the same books as all the children I babysat and when I was twelve, two of them were six. In fact, I read books for small children quite happily up until age 16 (when they mysteriously disappeared from my life for a time) which means, one summer, I read the complete works of Shakespeare (which was before I discovered Chaucer, so I must've been between 15 and 16) alongside Winnie the Pooh, Peter Rabbit, and a child's version of Robin Hood. This explains why I still read books for how well they're written, rather than whether they're written for someone my age. This thoroughly explains the joy I get from YA fantasy.
2. Thanks to Dad's addiction to buying boxes of random books at auctions, I read a surprising number of 19th century children's books before I was 12. And kept reading them afterwards, of course. This is what led me to the Curdie books which is what led me to William Morris and others.
3. My parents never said "You can't read this." This meant I read some astonishing works quite young (and was one of the kids who totally avoided drugs because of "Go Ask Alice", which I read when it first came out, which means I was about 10). Some of the books I disliked remain with me in memory, but my library does not hold them. A friend read period soft porn, for instance, and I read the novels to keep her company (I read everything I could get hold of, so I read a LOT of books to keep friends company) and the history was so bad that teenage Gillian never chased the books for herself when the friend moved to other books.
4. My mother still has the first Abbey book I ever read (Maid of the Abbey) but never had the first Chalet Girl books I read, for the L__s had those and I read them when we visited. I suspect the L__s got rid of them when they made aliyah. I'll ask one day, for one of the daughters (childhood playfriend) has returned, as one does. (And this is the sort of thing I've never seen in Australian fiction!)
5. My mother found the third book I ever owned outright, for myself (and didn't inherit as a schoolbook from a sister). It was called "Lucky Dip." It will be on my shelves when I next receive a box of things from Mum. So will enough other books so that I can start my work on cultural assumptions by finding out which of the books I read most often as a child gave me what kind of influence. It's really handy coming from a family that was so very stable that those books were mostly kept. And by this you know that I'm going to be examining some rather interesting books. I might blog them, eventually, for they say some unexpected things about my background and about Australia in the 1960s.
Five things are enough. My next challenge will be dinner. Then I get to do more on my next deadline! What happened today was that all the rest of my deadlines lined up in a nice row (thank you, editors!) and, if I keep my head down and work hard, I should be through the worst of things before teaching begins.
1. I read Little Golden Books at the same time as Thomas Hardy, because I read the same books as all the children I babysat and when I was twelve, two of them were six. In fact, I read books for small children quite happily up until age 16 (when they mysteriously disappeared from my life for a time) which means, one summer, I read the complete works of Shakespeare (which was before I discovered Chaucer, so I must've been between 15 and 16) alongside Winnie the Pooh, Peter Rabbit, and a child's version of Robin Hood. This explains why I still read books for how well they're written, rather than whether they're written for someone my age. This thoroughly explains the joy I get from YA fantasy.
2. Thanks to Dad's addiction to buying boxes of random books at auctions, I read a surprising number of 19th century children's books before I was 12. And kept reading them afterwards, of course. This is what led me to the Curdie books which is what led me to William Morris and others.
3. My parents never said "You can't read this." This meant I read some astonishing works quite young (and was one of the kids who totally avoided drugs because of "Go Ask Alice", which I read when it first came out, which means I was about 10). Some of the books I disliked remain with me in memory, but my library does not hold them. A friend read period soft porn, for instance, and I read the novels to keep her company (I read everything I could get hold of, so I read a LOT of books to keep friends company) and the history was so bad that teenage Gillian never chased the books for herself when the friend moved to other books.
4. My mother still has the first Abbey book I ever read (Maid of the Abbey) but never had the first Chalet Girl books I read, for the L__s had those and I read them when we visited. I suspect the L__s got rid of them when they made aliyah. I'll ask one day, for one of the daughters (childhood playfriend) has returned, as one does. (And this is the sort of thing I've never seen in Australian fiction!)
5. My mother found the third book I ever owned outright, for myself (and didn't inherit as a schoolbook from a sister). It was called "Lucky Dip." It will be on my shelves when I next receive a box of things from Mum. So will enough other books so that I can start my work on cultural assumptions by finding out which of the books I read most often as a child gave me what kind of influence. It's really handy coming from a family that was so very stable that those books were mostly kept. And by this you know that I'm going to be examining some rather interesting books. I might blog them, eventually, for they say some unexpected things about my background and about Australia in the 1960s.
Five things are enough. My next challenge will be dinner. Then I get to do more on my next deadline! What happened today was that all the rest of my deadlines lined up in a nice row (thank you, editors!) and, if I keep my head down and work hard, I should be through the worst of things before teaching begins.
January 22, 2016
gillpolack @ 2016-01-23T08:55:00
I've had a half day off. I need a nap before my day's work, however. This is because I only had a couple of hours sleep last night. It was stormy til 2 am and I woke up at 4.30 am, had a shower, sorted out a litre of Middle Eastern style coffee (with extra cardamom, because it felt right) and was picked up by a friend about 5 am. We then picked up another friend and drove to Mt Ainslie where we admired the aligned planets, watched dawn, drank coffee, went for a stroll, and met much wildlife. I took some pictures (not of the alignment - they would not have come out, alas) and am tempted to put a couple on my other blog for people to admire.
Just before 7 we wandered off and went to the markets. I bought apricots and blackberries and the last of the season's cherries and some of the best creme fraiche I've had in almost forever. We ate breakfast there and wandered and chatted to everyone.
I've just been dropped off, and am so very tired. We did a lot of walking (and I managed it all, which means the problem with the me the day before yesterday was purely weather-induced) and met kangaroos and rabbits and crows, and rosellas, and magpies, and parakeets and cockatoos and a single stray pigeon. "What is that exotic bird?" we asked each other in the half-dark and then it cocked its head and its inherent pigeonness became apparent.
Seeing Canberra at dawn is amazing, especially when one looks across from a mountain top. It rally is a beautiful city. I used to see it a lot when I had friends who were early birds and who liked to explore with me, but then I returned to my natural night owl self and I mostly see 2 am rather than 5.30 am and all the friends who like to explore do it with other friends. There's a wonder in seeing this beauty. Today had many moments of exquisite beauty and much friendship. All before 9 am...
Just before 7 we wandered off and went to the markets. I bought apricots and blackberries and the last of the season's cherries and some of the best creme fraiche I've had in almost forever. We ate breakfast there and wandered and chatted to everyone.
I've just been dropped off, and am so very tired. We did a lot of walking (and I managed it all, which means the problem with the me the day before yesterday was purely weather-induced) and met kangaroos and rabbits and crows, and rosellas, and magpies, and parakeets and cockatoos and a single stray pigeon. "What is that exotic bird?" we asked each other in the half-dark and then it cocked its head and its inherent pigeonness became apparent.
Seeing Canberra at dawn is amazing, especially when one looks across from a mountain top. It rally is a beautiful city. I used to see it a lot when I had friends who were early birds and who liked to explore with me, but then I returned to my natural night owl self and I mostly see 2 am rather than 5.30 am and all the friends who like to explore do it with other friends. There's a wonder in seeing this beauty. Today had many moments of exquisite beauty and much friendship. All before 9 am...
January 20, 2016
On erosion of lifestyle
I've only got two big deadlines to go this month. Three if things work out well. If the third doesn't come this month it will come when I have less time and will be a significant burden, but I have no control over that.
I don't have that much control over most of my deadlines. I negotiated a few extra weeks for one, because everyone (all kinds of people in all kinds of places) went away over the holiday period and expected to come back to my work on their desk (except for the one who agreed to my work on his desk before he went and who hasn't got back to me yet, which has resulted in the absence of one expected deadline).
The number of people who are asking for me to work while they're on leave is a new thing. There's always been someone who has a deadline in the new year, but mostly the holiday period is mine, to catch up on research with or to write significant amounts of fiction. I did the research, but the deadlines hit my writing time and I've written nothing for the other novel for five weeks. I don't know when I'll do the 30,000 words I'd planned. I doubt I'll finish my menopausal alien novel this year, given this. But I did not expect that everyone would generously sacrifice my time while they went on leave! I offered my time up to a couple of publishers, for we're working on various things and I knew the shape of the year in advance. But everyone has piled on board. Some of the demands were quite small: a few hundred words here, or a quick edit there. But today I added them up and it was a lot of work.
All I've missed out is work on one novel (and I did the monthly work for the other) because I'm Jewish and have no money to go away and etc. Much etc. It's not a big deal, because I work this time of year anyhow. This is why it didn't hit me until now. The practice of sending out all the work then giving the end of the holidays as the due date is a nasty one for people who aren't single, Jewish, without gainful employment (no teaching until February) and so forth. it's also new in the sheer amount of work people are sending out. I had 28 December deadlines, 6 January deadlines, 18 January deadlines and 31 January deadlines. I met most of them because I'm not on holiday in January. Even I (while not on holiday) was unable to meet all the 6 January ones, so I had to do a bit of negotiation.
The publishers I asked about rearranging were mostly good. And I can see why they're working this way. Turnover with edits and set-up of proofs and everything else is unbelievably quick with this new system.
I can't help thinking, however, that the new system threatens to do to the non-Jewish world what has been done unto me for the last 25 years: to replace any chance at a significant break. I used to take my break in two sections(over Passover and over Rosh Hashanah/Yom Kippur) and the exigencies of everyone else have diminished that so that now I invite a few friends round to celebrate with me on critical evenings. It's not a good thing to lose those breaks, even if you do nothing with them but hang around at home and dream of DIY.
I don't like this. I don't want this to happen to others. Protect your holidays. Be not like me! Exert the power of the cultural majority (be hegemonious!), and, if you're one of the ones who sets these deadlines, please seriously think of returning to the "We don't expect anything until February" rule.
I don't have that much control over most of my deadlines. I negotiated a few extra weeks for one, because everyone (all kinds of people in all kinds of places) went away over the holiday period and expected to come back to my work on their desk (except for the one who agreed to my work on his desk before he went and who hasn't got back to me yet, which has resulted in the absence of one expected deadline).
The number of people who are asking for me to work while they're on leave is a new thing. There's always been someone who has a deadline in the new year, but mostly the holiday period is mine, to catch up on research with or to write significant amounts of fiction. I did the research, but the deadlines hit my writing time and I've written nothing for the other novel for five weeks. I don't know when I'll do the 30,000 words I'd planned. I doubt I'll finish my menopausal alien novel this year, given this. But I did not expect that everyone would generously sacrifice my time while they went on leave! I offered my time up to a couple of publishers, for we're working on various things and I knew the shape of the year in advance. But everyone has piled on board. Some of the demands were quite small: a few hundred words here, or a quick edit there. But today I added them up and it was a lot of work.
All I've missed out is work on one novel (and I did the monthly work for the other) because I'm Jewish and have no money to go away and etc. Much etc. It's not a big deal, because I work this time of year anyhow. This is why it didn't hit me until now. The practice of sending out all the work then giving the end of the holidays as the due date is a nasty one for people who aren't single, Jewish, without gainful employment (no teaching until February) and so forth. it's also new in the sheer amount of work people are sending out. I had 28 December deadlines, 6 January deadlines, 18 January deadlines and 31 January deadlines. I met most of them because I'm not on holiday in January. Even I (while not on holiday) was unable to meet all the 6 January ones, so I had to do a bit of negotiation.
The publishers I asked about rearranging were mostly good. And I can see why they're working this way. Turnover with edits and set-up of proofs and everything else is unbelievably quick with this new system.
I can't help thinking, however, that the new system threatens to do to the non-Jewish world what has been done unto me for the last 25 years: to replace any chance at a significant break. I used to take my break in two sections(over Passover and over Rosh Hashanah/Yom Kippur) and the exigencies of everyone else have diminished that so that now I invite a few friends round to celebrate with me on critical evenings. It's not a good thing to lose those breaks, even if you do nothing with them but hang around at home and dream of DIY.
I don't like this. I don't want this to happen to others. Protect your holidays. Be not like me! Exert the power of the cultural majority (be hegemonious!), and, if you're one of the ones who sets these deadlines, please seriously think of returning to the "We don't expect anything until February" rule.
January 19, 2016
gillpolack @ 2016-01-20T12:49:00
You haven't heard from me for a few days because I've been busy meeting deadlines. I have 12 left of those 1000 primary sources I began a couple of months ago. I don't know if I'll finish reading those 12 by the end of the month, or if I'll work on my secondary sources for a bit. Either way, my research is where it needs to be if I'm going to get the book written this year.
I've finished three articles for three different places and, as far as I know, only have one more to write this month. Editing on them is almost all done, too.
I haven't got edits back yet for the next novel, so it's hard to work out if I'll get everything done in January, or if February's going to require 18 hour days (I so hope I get those edits in January! but it's not up to me) but I've been once through the first proof for the monograph and it's not going to be a big job. The editor's wish for me to hurry up with it makes sense: getting it out of the way means they have time to focus on works that are going to require more fixing. All the work that I and my support group put in last year has definitely paid dividends: I expected that not many changes were necessary, but I didn't quite expect this few. I have one more round with the proof to go. This is the slow round and the tougher one. And then I have the index. And then I send it and wait.
I also have about 10 forms to fill in this week. People have come back to work and so they send me paperwork.
All this will wait a few hours. It's not going to go away, and I am dealing with the news of a friend (who I've known 20 years) who has unexpectedly died of cancer. There's nothing I can do from the other side of the world except deal, so that's what I shall do. Tammy was one of the people who made the world a good place. I still haven't quite accepted that I'll never talk to her again.
I've finished three articles for three different places and, as far as I know, only have one more to write this month. Editing on them is almost all done, too.
I haven't got edits back yet for the next novel, so it's hard to work out if I'll get everything done in January, or if February's going to require 18 hour days (I so hope I get those edits in January! but it's not up to me) but I've been once through the first proof for the monograph and it's not going to be a big job. The editor's wish for me to hurry up with it makes sense: getting it out of the way means they have time to focus on works that are going to require more fixing. All the work that I and my support group put in last year has definitely paid dividends: I expected that not many changes were necessary, but I didn't quite expect this few. I have one more round with the proof to go. This is the slow round and the tougher one. And then I have the index. And then I send it and wait.
I also have about 10 forms to fill in this week. People have come back to work and so they send me paperwork.
All this will wait a few hours. It's not going to go away, and I am dealing with the news of a friend (who I've known 20 years) who has unexpectedly died of cancer. There's nothing I can do from the other side of the world except deal, so that's what I shall do. Tammy was one of the people who made the world a good place. I still haven't quite accepted that I'll never talk to her again.
January 12, 2016
gillpolack @ 2016-01-13T12:36:00
If I weren't a writer, my life would force me to be. In narrative terms, the moment the outside temperature hit 100 (which is a more narratively splendid number than the temperature in Celsius, even though the temperature in Celsius was a bit over a hundred) things have gone wrong. Most of them are small things but a couple were quite large. I'm hoping the sequence will change with the weather ie tomorrow, but if real life doesn't copy fiction then maybe good things will start before then.
In the meantime, characters have to do their bit for the story so for every thing that goes wrong I'm completing a counterpart. This means my tasks this afternoon include applying for a job, sending a story to market, watching a DVD, finishing an academic article and finishing a popular article. The heat wave lasts until tomorrow afternoon, so that's how long I've got to accomplish my sequence of narrative. And there's my normal work on top of this.
The real advantage of a heat wave isn't in inventing story, it's that it will be too hot to sleep until at least 3 am, so I have plenty of time to do a great deal of things. Just as long as no-one minds how tired and bedraggled I am while I do them.
I knew this afternoon would be too hot for work. I've known since I charted the probable temperature changes this week on Monday, when my body gave me clear indication of what was going to happen. I didn't calculate, however, on all my plans going awry. I ought to be sitting in front of the TV, watching the work-related DVD and letting my brain do the thinking for everything else. Instead I really wish I had a friend who could ring and say "Let's go to the new exhibition at the lovely air-conditioned library and let's stay there until closing time."
In the meantime, characters have to do their bit for the story so for every thing that goes wrong I'm completing a counterpart. This means my tasks this afternoon include applying for a job, sending a story to market, watching a DVD, finishing an academic article and finishing a popular article. The heat wave lasts until tomorrow afternoon, so that's how long I've got to accomplish my sequence of narrative. And there's my normal work on top of this.
The real advantage of a heat wave isn't in inventing story, it's that it will be too hot to sleep until at least 3 am, so I have plenty of time to do a great deal of things. Just as long as no-one minds how tired and bedraggled I am while I do them.
I knew this afternoon would be too hot for work. I've known since I charted the probable temperature changes this week on Monday, when my body gave me clear indication of what was going to happen. I didn't calculate, however, on all my plans going awry. I ought to be sitting in front of the TV, watching the work-related DVD and letting my brain do the thinking for everything else. Instead I really wish I had a friend who could ring and say "Let's go to the new exhibition at the lovely air-conditioned library and let's stay there until closing time."
January 11, 2016
gillpolack @ 2016-01-12T01:14:00
I'm in thinking mode because my tomorrow's task (besides enduring the ever-increasing heat) is to write another article on Nevil Shute. I've worked out my general approach, but I need time to think it through. When I write it, I will write it very quickly and it will be with the editor early tomorrow evening, but I need to have cogitated first.
So far I've cogitated while watching The Space Children (it turns out that Paramount allows non-Americans to see some of their youtube channel, and The Space Children was precisely what I needed to help me think about Shute), while eating frozen honeycake (I found some yesterday and I found some more today - I think my freezer has hidey-holes), while sorting some administrative tasks, while avoiding doing housework, while doing (very mild) exercise, while complaining about the heat and while creeping ever-closer to endgame with my mammoth reading-for-research.
If I read one 17th century book a day for the rest of the month... I'll finish early. Fifty of the books I was supposed to be reading turned out to be essential for a later stage, so I created a folder for them, noted what they were and why I did this, and moved on. This took two days because I had to read a swag to work this out - if I had cut corners I would have ended up with a 17th century sex manual in the folder, when really, I wanted the book about manners... and the titles didn't tell me which was which. All the rest of the time was thinking and sorting and thinking some more.
My biggest thoughts for yesterday and the day before were about witchcraft. A whole bunch of the most famous books on witchcraft for the period were really interesting to read, but not central to my needs. There are so many ways of seeing magic in the 17th century. Formal witch trials sometimes used one type of seeing and sometimes another and sometimes mixed them. I know now which I need and which I totally don't need. I don't need anything that reeks of James I (who was not a nice man) nor of Kramer and Sprenger (who were just as not nice, but in a different way). This is not a book about how frameworks for persecution were established by monks and other men of power. This is a book about women.
Spending two days looking at the whole question of formal magic and about 17th century intellectual frameworks for judging magic use made a great difference to the underlying shape of the world for the novel. It also helps me understand the folklore of the places I'll be using.
Having sorted all that and suddenly finding I'd made massive strides in other areas and my list of primary sources to check before I move to a broader view and to plotting and planning was rather nice, if surprising. I then spent today examining frost fairs. I might extend my novel or do an epilogue or something, for a frost fair is something I've yearned after and I may never experience one... but my characters can. One of the best and biggest frost fairs of London in recorded history was the year after my novel is set. And it could be handy. It could be very handy. Although thinking about frost fairs when it was just under 37 degrees outside was - while Gillianish - not very wise.
What this all means is that I don't return to the 17th century until Friday. I have an article to write and an article to edit (an academic one, so it needs time and focus and possibly much frustration). From Friday I will be checking proofs and finishing an index. This is work of such a focused kind that I have trouble spending more than a few hours a day at it, which is why I get to return to the 17th century.
And I just realised. Because I've been talking about my work here and elsewhere, I have had very few people ask "Did you like your holiday?" I'm having a perfectly frabjous January (except when it gets too hot) but it has much work and really oughtn't be considered a holiday. This is the first time in years I haven't had to defend this!
In other news, I'm watching Supergirl and Jessica Jones with a friend. They're a really interesting combination. Alas, we finish with Jessica Jones on Thursday. I'll be very glad to have seen it, however. Like Fury Road, it addresses some of the issues I have with recent television and movies.
So far I've cogitated while watching The Space Children (it turns out that Paramount allows non-Americans to see some of their youtube channel, and The Space Children was precisely what I needed to help me think about Shute), while eating frozen honeycake (I found some yesterday and I found some more today - I think my freezer has hidey-holes), while sorting some administrative tasks, while avoiding doing housework, while doing (very mild) exercise, while complaining about the heat and while creeping ever-closer to endgame with my mammoth reading-for-research.
If I read one 17th century book a day for the rest of the month... I'll finish early. Fifty of the books I was supposed to be reading turned out to be essential for a later stage, so I created a folder for them, noted what they were and why I did this, and moved on. This took two days because I had to read a swag to work this out - if I had cut corners I would have ended up with a 17th century sex manual in the folder, when really, I wanted the book about manners... and the titles didn't tell me which was which. All the rest of the time was thinking and sorting and thinking some more.
My biggest thoughts for yesterday and the day before were about witchcraft. A whole bunch of the most famous books on witchcraft for the period were really interesting to read, but not central to my needs. There are so many ways of seeing magic in the 17th century. Formal witch trials sometimes used one type of seeing and sometimes another and sometimes mixed them. I know now which I need and which I totally don't need. I don't need anything that reeks of James I (who was not a nice man) nor of Kramer and Sprenger (who were just as not nice, but in a different way). This is not a book about how frameworks for persecution were established by monks and other men of power. This is a book about women.
Spending two days looking at the whole question of formal magic and about 17th century intellectual frameworks for judging magic use made a great difference to the underlying shape of the world for the novel. It also helps me understand the folklore of the places I'll be using.
Having sorted all that and suddenly finding I'd made massive strides in other areas and my list of primary sources to check before I move to a broader view and to plotting and planning was rather nice, if surprising. I then spent today examining frost fairs. I might extend my novel or do an epilogue or something, for a frost fair is something I've yearned after and I may never experience one... but my characters can. One of the best and biggest frost fairs of London in recorded history was the year after my novel is set. And it could be handy. It could be very handy. Although thinking about frost fairs when it was just under 37 degrees outside was - while Gillianish - not very wise.
What this all means is that I don't return to the 17th century until Friday. I have an article to write and an article to edit (an academic one, so it needs time and focus and possibly much frustration). From Friday I will be checking proofs and finishing an index. This is work of such a focused kind that I have trouble spending more than a few hours a day at it, which is why I get to return to the 17th century.
And I just realised. Because I've been talking about my work here and elsewhere, I have had very few people ask "Did you like your holiday?" I'm having a perfectly frabjous January (except when it gets too hot) but it has much work and really oughtn't be considered a holiday. This is the first time in years I haven't had to defend this!
In other news, I'm watching Supergirl and Jessica Jones with a friend. They're a really interesting combination. Alas, we finish with Jessica Jones on Thursday. I'll be very glad to have seen it, however. Like Fury Road, it addresses some of the issues I have with recent television and movies.
January 7, 2016
gillpolack @ 2016-01-07T23:30:00
Today was pretty much a day off, because I finished watching Penny Dreadful and have now seen the original Mad Max movie. I also saw the recent Cinderella, which was very soothing and predictable. All of these came for me and must be returned by me quite soon, which was good, for I needed thinking time for my research. Things weren't fitting together and the movies helped. Except Constantine. Constantine as a movie exemplified the reason I had trouble with my thinking. Workwise, I finished with five books and hope to finish with at least two more, but it's a small day.
Except ... that thinking time meant I now understand why medicine lost the use of magic formulae and that it mostly happened in the 17th century. This makes me very happy.
It's a big world view issue and means I may be able to marry the medieval with the modern in a range of things. I'll have to check them out for those things, of course, but I now have the proper framework for so checking. Basically, Keith Thomas led me gently astray. I'll have to re-read him when I've fully sorted out what these wonderful pamphlets and books are saying and find out if he really led me astray or whether I, in my twenty-year-old incarnation, misread him. I can see why this period has been described as the voice of reason overcoming an age of credulity, but that's not what it is at all. Just as Church and State were separating, Medicine and Church were separating. The doctor in one of my pamphlets-du-jour was carefully analysing to see if a particular group of possessed women had to be treated medically or religiously. Render unto Caesar - a very Christian thought.
I still don't know about so many things, and it's interfering with my concentration, so I'm catching up on other parts of my life. Next week I have deadlines again and won't have this luxury. To be honest, this week I should be working to deadline, but the combination between muscles that don't like me and an outside world that dislikes telling me things makes it much more sensible to free up much space next week by doing easy things this. And by watching more Mad max.
Except ... that thinking time meant I now understand why medicine lost the use of magic formulae and that it mostly happened in the 17th century. This makes me very happy.
It's a big world view issue and means I may be able to marry the medieval with the modern in a range of things. I'll have to check them out for those things, of course, but I now have the proper framework for so checking. Basically, Keith Thomas led me gently astray. I'll have to re-read him when I've fully sorted out what these wonderful pamphlets and books are saying and find out if he really led me astray or whether I, in my twenty-year-old incarnation, misread him. I can see why this period has been described as the voice of reason overcoming an age of credulity, but that's not what it is at all. Just as Church and State were separating, Medicine and Church were separating. The doctor in one of my pamphlets-du-jour was carefully analysing to see if a particular group of possessed women had to be treated medically or religiously. Render unto Caesar - a very Christian thought.
I still don't know about so many things, and it's interfering with my concentration, so I'm catching up on other parts of my life. Next week I have deadlines again and won't have this luxury. To be honest, this week I should be working to deadline, but the combination between muscles that don't like me and an outside world that dislikes telling me things makes it much more sensible to free up much space next week by doing easy things this. And by watching more Mad max.
January 6, 2016
gillpolack @ 2016-01-06T21:49:00
I saw the first two episodes of Season 5 of Downton Abbey ages back, when they were first out, but it's taken til now to get hold of the rest. It's proven very timely, even if it puts my regular work in disarray.
My non-work for the week is one of the projects I set myself because I'm going to need it sometime and would rather have thinking space before that becomes immediate. I've got hold of more of the books people recommended on Australian Judaism by YA writers. (Bear with me, this is relevant.) The library today had - as well as Downton Abbey - Eli Glasman's The Boy's Own Manual to being a Proper Jew and Morris Lurie's Whole Life (his autobiography).
I told Mum about my haul and she knows someone in Glasman's family and is joining me in my reading program (these two things are unrelated). As I said the other day, she also knows some people from Lurie's family. She sees his cousin every time she looks in the mirror.
I'm looking forward to having her read his autobiography and finding out what our side of the family makes of it. I read it when it first came out and was very surprised at how differently he saw the family. Mum didn't read it then. I'm really looking forward to this group read.
I have very little in common with the Jewish girl in the very charming ballet book I read last week, even though I walk the same streets she walked whenever I'm in Melbourne and my nephews would have gone to the same school as her male teen characters. The same with Glasman, even though my mother knows who his mishpocha are. I'm becoming very tired of seeing just the Ultra-Orthodox depicted. I need to find novels that spread their wings a bit more: Judaism in Australia is far more interesting than that. The streets of Melbourne are not paved with Chaim Potok's pages, despite the books I'm currently discovering.
And this is where Downton Abbey fits in. Its link to me is not nearly as distant as I expected. My father's mother's family were not of the same social group as the Jewish characters in Downton Abbey. They would, however, have met them and possibly even have shared a synagogue if they were in the same city. The Downton family would have heard my cousin Linda's music and read her criticism if they visited Australia, for instance. No titles and no money in my family, but we are Anglo-Jewish on that side. My great-grandfather (the non-Anglo of his generation - he was originally Polish, which may surprise you, given he gave me my surname) took out British citizenship in the 1870s.
This made me realise that, in fiction terms, my family is that pivotal point where Downton Abbey meets My Name is Asher Lev. In real terms it's that pivotal point where Bruce Ruxton meets the Marxists. The moment in Downton that made me ineffably happy was when Rose didn't think twice but gave Atticus his actual nationality and didn't tangle it with the Judaism. Due to my father's mother's family, I am Australian the way Atticus is English, but from a poor and thinking line rather than from a well-to-do one. Every time someone assumes I'm not Australian, I feel wrong inside. One of the happiest moments of my life was when a Warlpiri elder told me I was Australian, that there is no doubt about it, no reason to question it. I am exceptionally impressed that Julian Fellowes picked this up and nuanced it properly.
All this is why my normal schedule will be disrupted for the rest of the evening. I may hate what comes next, but at least I know it's being told by a writer who understands.
All this is also work. My next novel (coming out sooner rather than later - it's with the editor now, but I haven't been given timings yet) deals with that sense of being Jewish and Australian. There isn't a single Ultra-Orthodox character in it, however. This may mean I continue to be left off lists of Jewish Australian writers (I'm on one list, just one). And now I'm wittering. I shall make a cuppa and return to Downton Abbey.
My non-work for the week is one of the projects I set myself because I'm going to need it sometime and would rather have thinking space before that becomes immediate. I've got hold of more of the books people recommended on Australian Judaism by YA writers. (Bear with me, this is relevant.) The library today had - as well as Downton Abbey - Eli Glasman's The Boy's Own Manual to being a Proper Jew and Morris Lurie's Whole Life (his autobiography).
I told Mum about my haul and she knows someone in Glasman's family and is joining me in my reading program (these two things are unrelated). As I said the other day, she also knows some people from Lurie's family. She sees his cousin every time she looks in the mirror.
I'm looking forward to having her read his autobiography and finding out what our side of the family makes of it. I read it when it first came out and was very surprised at how differently he saw the family. Mum didn't read it then. I'm really looking forward to this group read.
I have very little in common with the Jewish girl in the very charming ballet book I read last week, even though I walk the same streets she walked whenever I'm in Melbourne and my nephews would have gone to the same school as her male teen characters. The same with Glasman, even though my mother knows who his mishpocha are. I'm becoming very tired of seeing just the Ultra-Orthodox depicted. I need to find novels that spread their wings a bit more: Judaism in Australia is far more interesting than that. The streets of Melbourne are not paved with Chaim Potok's pages, despite the books I'm currently discovering.
And this is where Downton Abbey fits in. Its link to me is not nearly as distant as I expected. My father's mother's family were not of the same social group as the Jewish characters in Downton Abbey. They would, however, have met them and possibly even have shared a synagogue if they were in the same city. The Downton family would have heard my cousin Linda's music and read her criticism if they visited Australia, for instance. No titles and no money in my family, but we are Anglo-Jewish on that side. My great-grandfather (the non-Anglo of his generation - he was originally Polish, which may surprise you, given he gave me my surname) took out British citizenship in the 1870s.
This made me realise that, in fiction terms, my family is that pivotal point where Downton Abbey meets My Name is Asher Lev. In real terms it's that pivotal point where Bruce Ruxton meets the Marxists. The moment in Downton that made me ineffably happy was when Rose didn't think twice but gave Atticus his actual nationality and didn't tangle it with the Judaism. Due to my father's mother's family, I am Australian the way Atticus is English, but from a poor and thinking line rather than from a well-to-do one. Every time someone assumes I'm not Australian, I feel wrong inside. One of the happiest moments of my life was when a Warlpiri elder told me I was Australian, that there is no doubt about it, no reason to question it. I am exceptionally impressed that Julian Fellowes picked this up and nuanced it properly.
All this is why my normal schedule will be disrupted for the rest of the evening. I may hate what comes next, but at least I know it's being told by a writer who understands.
All this is also work. My next novel (coming out sooner rather than later - it's with the editor now, but I haven't been given timings yet) deals with that sense of being Jewish and Australian. There isn't a single Ultra-Orthodox character in it, however. This may mean I continue to be left off lists of Jewish Australian writers (I'm on one list, just one). And now I'm wittering. I shall make a cuppa and return to Downton Abbey.
