Barry Graham's Blog, page 57

How do you reconcile your sex drive and your Buddhism? I love sex and consider myself a bit of a freak and a talented lover, but the constant lusting wears me thin. It occupies a lot of my time and brain space, competes for my awareness. What to do? Abstai

If only it were as simple as abstaining. If your issue is the “constant lusting,” abstention most likely wouldn’t make any difference. I think the way to practice with this is the same way we practice with any obsessive thoughts—just notice them, without judgment. Don’t try not to have those desires, and don’t welcome them either. Just note them.

There’s nothing wrong with lusts or desires, but suffering shows up when we start believing them, when we start thinking that we need to satisfy thos...

How do you reconcile your sex drive and your Buddhism? I love sex and consider myself a bit of a freak and a talented lover, but the constant lusting wears me thin. It occupies a lot of my time and brain space, competes for my awareness. What to do? Abstai

If only it were as simple as abstaining. If your issue is the “constant lusting,” abstention most likely wouldn’t make any difference. I think the way to practice with this is the same way we practice with any obsessive thoughts—just notice them, without judgment. Don’t try not to have those desires, and don’t welcome them either. Just note them.

There’s nothing wrong with lusts or desires, but suffering shows up when we start believing them, when we start thinking that we need to satisfy thos...

How do you reconcile your sex drive and your Buddhism? I love sex and consider myself a bit of a freak and a talented lover, but the constant lusting wears me thin. It occupies a lot of my time and brain space, competes for my awareness. What to do? Abstai

If only it were as simple as abstaining. If your issue is the “constant lusting,” abstention most likely wouldn’t make any difference. I think the way to practice with this is the same way we practice with any obsessive thoughts—just notice them, without judgment. Don’t try not to have those desires, and don’t welcome them either. Just note them.

There’s nothing wrong with lusts or desires, but suffering shows up when we start believing them, when we start thinking that we need to satisfy thos...

How do you reconcile your sex drive and your Buddhism? I love sex and consider myself a bit of a freak and a talented lover, but the constant lusting wears me thin. It occupies a lot of my time and brain space, competes for my awareness. What to do? Abstai

If only it were as simple as abstaining. If your issue is the “constant lusting,” abstention most likely wouldn’t make any difference. I think the way to practice with this is the same way we practice with any obsessive thoughts—just notice them, without judgment. Don’t try not to have those desires, and don’t welcome them either. Just note them.

There’s nothing wrong with lusts or desires, but suffering shows up when we start believing them, when we start thinking that we need to satisfy thos...

How do you reconcile your sex drive and your Buddhism? I love sex and consider myself a bit of a freak and a talented lover, but the constant lusting wears me thin. It occupies a lot of my time and brain space, competes for my awareness. What to do? Abstai

If only it were as simple as abstaining. If your issue is the “constant lusting,” abstention most likely wouldn’t make any difference. I think the way to practice with this is the same way we practice with any obsessive thoughts—just notice them, without judgment. Don’t try not to have those desires, and don’t welcome them either. Just note them.

There’s nothing wrong with lusts or desires, but suffering shows up when we start believing them, when we start thinking that we need to satisfy thos...

How do you reconcile your sex drive and your Buddhism? I love sex and consider myself a bit of a freak and a talented lover, but the constant lusting wears me thin. It occupies a lot of my time and brain space, competes for my awareness. What to do? Abstai

If only it were as simple as abstaining. If your issue is the “constant lusting,” abstention most likely wouldn’t make any difference. I think the way to practice with this is the same way we practice with any obsessive thoughts—just notice them, without judgment. Don’t try not to have those desires, and don’t welcome them either. Just note them.

There’s nothing wrong with lusts or desires, but suffering shows up when we start believing them, when we start thinking that we need to satisfy thos...

How do you reconcile your sex drive and your Buddhism? I love sex and consider myself a bit of a freak and a talented lover, but the constant lusting wears me thin. It occupies a lot of my time and brain space, competes for my awareness. What to do? Abstai

If only it were as simple as abstaining. If your issue is the “constant lusting,” abstention most likely wouldn’t make any difference. I think the way to practice with this is the same way we practice with any obsessive thoughts—just notice them, without judgment. Don’t try not to have those desires, and don’t welcome them either. Just note them.

There’s nothing wrong with lusts or desires, but suffering shows up when we start believing them, when we start thinking that we need to satisfy thos...

Scotland's Greatest Time

While I’m disappointed that a majority of Scots have voted against independence, I’m happy and inspired nonetheless. Scots are more engaged now than at anytime in living memory, and, with almost four million people voting, this has been the greatest incidence of participation in democracy in Scotland’s history.

As a child and young man in Scotland, the only hope I ever felt was the hope of getting out of there. I now feel hopeful for Scotland for the first time ever.

Ewan Morrison misses the point of the Scottish Independence Referendum

I’m baffled by Scottish writer Ewan Morrison’s change of mind about his support for independence. Having briefly decided on Yes, he switched to No. (In response, our mutual friend Kevin Williamson wrote this open letter to him.)

I find this part of Mr. Morrison’s statement especially bizarre:

It was within a public meeting that I realised there was no absolutely no debate within the Yes camp. Zero debate – the focus was instead on attacking the enemy and creating an impenetrab...

Hoping that Scotland makes my early writing redundant

My first four books are set in the desperate, desolate Scotland I was born into. I hope that today Scotland will vote to make these books historical documents.