Sam Rainer's Blog, page 14

How Not to Waste Everyone’s Time with Snooze Fest Church Meetings

I’ve been there. Maybe you have too. A discussion about a $100 expense swirls around the committee for thirty minutes. Someone believes they can save ten percent. You work hard to hold back the desire to slap a ten-dollar bill on the table.

When meetings turn sour, everyone gets agitated. These meetings keep you on the edge of your seat. But it’s more likely a church meeting will drone on. So how can these meetings be less of a snooze fest and more engaging and valuable?

No matter what your poli...

Six Questions to Discern Toxic Conflict vs. Healthy Conflict

Few people desire to live in a perpetual state of conflict. A constant battle is exhausting. Continual tension can lead to major spiritual, emotional, and physical problems. But avoiding conflict is just as unhealthy.

Unfortunately, the label of toxicity is applied too often. For example, criticism is not necessarily toxic, even when it is misguided. The critic becomes toxic only with elevated intensity and repeated frequency. A cantankerous spirit is annoying but not often toxic. Complaining is...

How to Set Annual Goals with Your Church Staff

Setting annual goals is mundane and unemotional—but completely necessary. Without these goals, the pathway through the year lacks clarity, like a group of people navigating a trip with unstated directions in their heads and no agreed-upon route to a particular destination. That’s how horror movies begin.

Annual goals should be more tactical and less visionary. Tactics are the operational steps to achieving the desired end. Your yearly goals act like step-by-step instructions moving the church cl...

Be the Church that Embraces Children, Not Just Tolerates Them

There are two kinds of restaurants—those that embrace children and those that tolerate children. You know this reality if you’re a parent, especially if you have multiple small children. When my family of six storms a restaurant, I can tell immediately whether the establishment will embrace my children or tolerate them.

In a recent occurrence, the host looked at my brood with eyes wide: “Oh, my. You have . . .  a lot of kids.” I was not offended. Serving large families at a restaurant is tough. ...

Leading Others When They Are Frustrated and Angry with the Church

Frustration can raise stress levels. Anger can leave you and others on edge. While neither frustration nor anger are inherently sinful, both raise the temperature in the room. Both are also inevitable. People will become frustrated and angry.

Since these two emotions are unavoidable, how do you lead those who are frustrated and angry in your church?

First, understand the source of each emotion. Frustration typically derives from the feeling you cannot change or achieve something. It can be expre...

Avoid Bringing This Leadership Baggage into Your Church

God created leadership for the church. Jesus is the Chief Shepherd, and He sets aside other shepherds to lead the church by serving under Him. Members of the church are to follow those who keep watch over their spiritual development. Additionally, these leaders should not abuse their authority but rather lead by example.

This relationship between leaders and followers in the church is clothed in humility through God’s gift of grace. But all leaders bring baggage into this relationship. It’s easi...

How Pastors Should Answer the Hardest Leadership Question

It’s the most challenging leadership question to answer: Am I humble?

Humility is the most difficult leadership trait to determine about ourselves. Pride is the most dangerous leadership trait. Arrogance is the root leadership problem. Our sinful nature propels us to an excessive and unhealthy focus on ourselves.

It’s the quintessential leadership struggle. We stand on a sliding scale somewhere between healthy humility and unhealthy pride. Even at our best, determining where we are on this scale...

The Impact of Shrinking Work Commute Times on Your Church

People dread the commute to work. In a recent survey, over half of those who work remotely stated commute times are the top reason they do not want to return to the office. Other reasons include well-being and flexibility, which are also tied to the length of commuting times.

For years, commute times slowly got longer. The pandemic seems to have broken this trend. Anything longer than twenty-five minutes is the new limit.

Will this trend last? Will a desire for shorter commute times be temporary...

What Lead Pastors Might Be Missing with NextGen Ministry

Quite frankly, it’s easy for a lead pastor to neglect the NextGen ministry. As long as volunteers are in place for the nursery and teachers are in the classrooms for children, we lead pastors tend not to dedicate much time to this area of the church. If the students are not causing ripples with the adults, everything must be going smoothly, right? The next generation of the church deserves more from you. Your NextGen staff deserves more from you. Your NextGen volunteers deserve more from you.

In...

The Number One Missing Ingredient in Church Leadership

In the 1970s, one researcher noted, “There are almost as many different definitions of leadership as there are persons who have attempted to define the concept.” According to these definitions, leadership is influence, power, mobilization, motivation, processes, and inspiration, among many others.

The same could be said of the church: “There are almost as many different ways of leading the church as there are persons who have attempted it.”

There are a lot of good studies, books, and articles on...