Ellison James's Blog, page 5

Dabbling in the Dark Side

Many of you have done it, if only in your fantasies. I'm talking about all things encompassing the BDSM lifestyle.

I use the term 'lifestyle' because I've found through my research that those practicing this with the highest level of commitment, are into the entire lifestyle. For most of us though, this phrase is often thrown around with the act of tying your partner up, or spanking them to spice things up.

I've been researching this for quite some time now because I've wanted to learn about this lifestyle in order to write a story about someone involved in BDSM or getting involved in it at some level, from simple spanking all the way up to becoming a live-in Dom or Sub.

For those of you like me-on the fringes, looking at this lifestyle-peering in for just a sample of what it's all about, let me explain some things.

The term 'BDSM' really encompasses six things, not just four, as the acronym would imply. First there's bondage and discipline. Of course, bondage is the tying up part but the lifestyle goes beyond that. For the true BDSM aficionado, bondage is about control-ownership. Discipline goes along with bondage as a means of supporting that control and ownership.

The 'D' and 'S' in the acronym also mean 'Dominance' and 'Submission.' This means that, in this relationship, one partner plays the dominant role, while the other plays the submissive role. Some people are good at (or enjoy) one role or the other. A person that can play both roles is called a switch.

The 'S' also stands for 'Sadism' along with the last letter 'M' for 'Masochism.' This deals with the blurry borders between pleasure and pain. Specifically sadists gain pleasure (most often, sexual pleasure) from having pain inflicted upon them, while masochists gain that pleasure from inflicting the pain on others.

Keep in mind here that the key to this lifestyle is consensual participation.

There is so much more to BDSM than I can possibly discuss here but know that it is mostly about power play, ownership, and control by all parties involved. The entire lifestyle is very psychological in its very nature, and explores what some might consider, some very Freudian issues.

It is important to understand though, that when you read, or write in my case, about tying up a partner, or spanking, or even some taboo issues such as daddy/teacher play, you are dabbling in the realm of BDSM.

Is that necessarily a bad thing? No, I don't think so. I just find it interesting how all these practices are considered so taboo by many, yet so worth exploring if for no other reason than self awareness.

What are your thoughts?

Amazon KDP Select - My Thoughts

For the last ninety days I've had two books listed in Amazon's KDP Select program. This post serves as a short analysis of my experience with the program.

My analysis will, of course, be short and without a bunch of graphical data. I choose to just post my own personal experience.

The two books I selected for the program were: Window Treatment and All the Right Places.

The number one advantage to enrolling in the program was it allowed me to list my books free for a total of five days out of the ninety day enrollment period. While I saw a marked increase in purchases while the books were listed as free, they also fell under the free ebooks category for sales standings. When they reverted back to their ninety-nine cent price, they saw only a temporary rise in position.

As most of you know, position is everything in marketing ebooks on Amazon, or any other online sales channel. Once a book climbs to the lofty top one hundred position, it tends to stay there awhile. I've yet to see any of my books (except The Fifth Beauty, offered free) make it into this top one hundred position. My sales tend to be slow and steady.

The major downside to enrollment in the KDP Select program is the exclusivity clause. Books enrolled in the program cannot be marketed through any other sales channel. For me, this one disadvantage far outweighed any positive the program may have provided.

I believe the potential sales I lost at Barnes and Noble, ARe, Apple iBooks, Kobo, Diesel, Smashwords, and other markets were more than any possible gains through Amazon, Although their literature made it seem as though my sales would skyrocket because of the the ability for their Prime members to "borrow" books in the program.

I think it was a sham. I had less than ten books borrowed throughout the ninety days of program enrollment.
For this reason, I will not continue with this program, and republish my two test books into their previous channels.
Now, I must ask the readers out there, How does Amazon's Prime program affect you? Is it worth the money to enroll? If you have enrolled, do you borrow many books?
I believe it was worth it to try this program with a sample of my work, but was not overall impressed with the results. Although, I certainly liked the ability to offer my work free for a limited time, the results did not justify the effort.
Next, I may try offering my books (and maybe a select few others) for sale from my website.
Oh, and by the way. Here's a sneak peak at my next project, available soon

Talk About Sex

Yes, I said it.

In the melodic words of Salt n Peppa, let's talk about sex. Why not? Sex permeates everything we think or do in our lives.

But specifically, I want to talk about writing and reading about sex.

"Literature - creative literature - unconcerned with sex, is inconceivable." - Gertrude Stein.

I suppose I can't say that ALL stories ever written were about sex, the but in the majority of adult literature, sex is, at the very least, an undercurrent.

Why is sex so popular? I believe it is because when one reads about sex, whether it be romantic or purely physical, they are reading about pleasure, mysticism, magic. Sex transports us to a realm of fantasy. I'm not saying that every story or piece of literature should ooze sex appeal or graphically depict the act at every chance. I am suggesting though that sex should be allowed to be a part of the story as much any other element of character or plot. In the case of erotica, sex can literally become the plot.

"Sex is as important as eating or drinking and we ought to allow the one appetite to be satisfied with as little restraint or false modesty as the other." - Marque de Sade.

I've often been accused of writing highly sexualized and wanton stories, even in works I don't necessarily consider 'erotica.' I believe this is because I choose to include the natural act within the lives of my characters. One might even say I allow the sexual or physical relationship to intertwine within the romantic relationship, helping to build layers in the characters. After all, isn't that like it is in real life?

Sex often takes a political place within a relationship. Sex can be both kind or cruel. People grow up with so many hang-ups about sex, even the most normal expressions of physical pleasure and release, can seem taboo to them.

"Sex is full of lies. The body tries to tell the truth but it's usually too battered with rules to heard, and bound with pretense so it can hardly move. We cripple ourselves with lies." - Jim Morrison.

That's why I often write erotica. It is a way to experience a fantasy. It is a way to live outside the realm of rules and pretense - if only for awhile. I believe also that this is why erotica maintains its popularity.

One can read about something they might otherwise know only as 'kink' or 'disgusting' without being made to feel guilty about it.

"Don't worry, it only seems kinky the first time." - Anonymous.

Many people allow their beliefs to blur the lines and think that something out of the ordinary is perverse when, in fact, it may just be another form of expression. The things we might call kink may be what allows one to fully let go. It may be the thing that brings the magic.

"Kinky is using a feather. Perverted is using the whole chicken." - Anonymous.

So, what say you? Why do enjoy reading or writing works of erotica? Do you read about things you would never do in real life or do you do things in real life you'd never even read about?

Back From The Nether

I Bet you thought I was gone to never return. It is somewhat true. I've been 'out of sorts' in more ways than one these last few weeks. I only hope my small following hasn't given up on my, and left me for dead because I'm still very much alive and kicking.
I took some time for a short vacation, driving nearly thirteen-hundred miles to see my son in the West Texas town of El Paso. We stayed there for a week, visiting Carlsbad Caverns and a small Winery in New Mexico. We toured El Paso pretty extensively, and even ventured to San Antonio to see the Alamo while visiting. We made a couple stops in Louisiana on the way back home. We visited the Tabasco headquarters on Avery island and ate a feast of a lunch at a great Cajun restaurant in the city of Lafayette. We also hiked up a very steep mountains to visit some old Navajo caves that turned out to be little more than depressions in the side of a cliff, but the walk was nice. We went to a Brazilian steak house where we were fed so much meat, we were all sick to our stomachs. It was a fun time had by all!
It was a great little vacation - and much needed - but it ended too soon. Also, we kept so busy, and the hotel was so nice that I barely got any writing done. I know, it's strange for me not to write on the road as I usually do my best writing while tucked away in some raggy little hotel somewhere.

But not this time.

Although my laptop remained plugged in, turned on, and perched on the granite table top in the lavish hotel room, I only managed to pound out about thirty words the entire week. THIRTY WORDS! What's wrong with me?  Well, nothing, really. I just stayed too busy and was so exhausted each night upon returning, I would simply fall to the bed.

I decided to suspend my weekly work in progress post. I realized that by posting work in a draft form, I was doing myself, and my readers, a disservice. Plus, I've struggled with the current major work in progress, and I'm beginning to wonder why, from a psychological standpoint, why I am still unable to come up with a title for the story. Those who know me will understand that psychology goes into much of what I do ... or do not do. I think that's true of most writers.

Anyway, to rest my mind and unfurrow my brow, I'm working on some shorter stories while I gather my thoughts. Expect to see some short, more-or-less plotless, fun, sexy stories out soon. The first, I've tentatively titled, Surrogate for now. Another, which is still stewing around in my head, I will title, Threshold .

Surrogate concerns a woman agreeing to take part in a scientific study revolving around the theory and/or practice of remote viewing/remote influence. She is given instructions to simply go into a dimly lit room, undress, and get comfortable. In another room, a woman, advanced in the art of remote influence will attempt to physically manipulate the unknown subject in the room next door. She will attempt to influence the subject sexually. In order to do this, she needs a surrogate - a real physical person with whom she can physically touch and pleasure in order to project her tactile feelings onto the unknown subject. The story will be told through the point of view of all three participants individually.

Threshold will involve a woman into the BDSM lifestyle. she will come to the same clinic as the previous story to take part in a study on determining the threshold between pleasure and pain. She intends to prove the threshold lies far beyond conventional wisdom. But, the clinic has found just the man willing and able to take her to that threshold, and beyond.

I haven't worked out all the details of the second story yet, but I've had other ideas that dabbled in this realm and have done much research on the subject.

Hope you all haven't forgotten me in my absence. Thank you for your patience. I'm now back in the game again.

WIP Wednesday

In this week's post. I introduce a new character. Well he's not exactly a new character; he played opposite Azra Barsonus, my main character in "Lovestruck Succubus."
In this scene, Leonidas has received news of his father's passing. Naturally, he's not too happy about it and, furthermore, feels terrible that he wasn't there when his father died. His emotions out of control, he shifts, and finds himself hunting within the confines of Piedmont Park in Atlanta, Georgia.

Raif Lungren snatched the microphone from the holder, and responded to the call."This is unit thirty-four. Whatcha got, dispatch?""Got a call about some kind of wild animal running through Piedmont Park."Raif looked at his partner, sitting in the passenger seat, stuffing a chicken nugget in his mouth."You wanna take this, McClinton?"McClinton licked his fingers. "We're close enough, why not?" He said, spitting little chunks of chicken nugget out as he spoke.Lungren clicked the button on the microphone, "We're in the area," he said. "We'll take it.""Roger, thirty-four," the dispatcher's voice resounded through the car's speaker system. "Animal control is on their way, if you'll do some crowd control until they get there."Lungren flipped the switch turning on the lights and siren, and weaved through traffic. He turned off the siren before reaching the North parking lot of Piedmont Park, but left the lights on to warn any lovers parked in the dark. He didn't really feel like processing a bunch of late-night lovers and giving citations while waiting for animal control."Holy shit," McClinton said as Lungren turned the squad car into the middle of the small parking lot.Lungren looked through the beam of the headlights in time to see a huge beast standing in the light, looking at them."What the hell is that?" Lungren said.Lungren understood why dispatch just said it was a wild animal running through the park. There really was no rational explanation of what he was looking at. The thing standing in the beams of the headlights was more like a bunch of animals put together like some kind of weird medical experiment. It didn't even move from the light. It just stood there motionless, looking at them with a kind of snarl forming across its snout; and they looked back, equally transfixed, from inside their squad car."Is that a wolf?" Lungren heard McClinton unsnapping his holster as he spoke. "Or, maybe it's a bear."It was hard to tell. The thing was standing on its hind legs like a bear, or a man, but it looked like some kind of huge wolf."Wait," McClinton said as he pulled the door handle, popping the passenger door open just a crack. "It's a man in a wolf costume. Gotta be. It looks too much like a human.""Wait," Lungren yelled at him. "I don't think so." But it was too late. McClinton was already pushing the door open, and stepping out of the car as he unholstered his weapon.As soon as McClinton stood outside the door, the animal charged. Lungren wanted to yell for him to get back in the car, but the animal moved too fast. In the next instant, it closed the distance with his partner, and had him by the neck, ripping at him and dragging him toward the edge of the parking lot into the darkness. The animal only moved about twenty feet back but had already left pieces of his partner in a trail from the squad car. McClinton's arm lay by itself just feet from the car, his lifeless hand still gripping the handgun. Lungren didn't think, simply reacting to the violent display in front of him. The beast moved so fast, McClinton didn't even get a shot off. Lungren was not going to make the same mistake. He felt his face burn with rage. He wasn't just going to let this beast drag his partner away and tear him to shreds. He didn't know what the hell this thing was, but it was no human. He opened the car door and jumped out of the car, slamming the door shut behind him. The noise got the animal's attention, and he dropped his partner, looking squarely at Lungren.Lungren raised his pistol and fired. He saw blood spray from the animal's shoulder. The beast barely flinched before launching itself toward him. He fire again, three times. The beast flinched each time, signifying a hit, but it didn't stop. Lungren tried to step backward, pulling the trigger until he heard the click of the hammer on an empty chamber. Just as the beast launch itself at him, he tripped over something and fell backwards. The animal flew over him, landing somewhere out of his field of vision with a thump and a growl. But the beast was back, and ripping at him before he could move. He felt his own skin ripping from his chest as the thing tore at him, felt large canines cupping his arm and clamping down until his bones snapped under the pressure.Darkness closed in on him, moving from the corners of his vision until it was inside him. Everything slowed down, as if time itself was tormenting him, making him live in this brief moment for an eternity. He saw the beast all over him as if looking at snapshots in time--the shiny glint of eyes and bloodied teeth flashing in front of him. He felt the animal's mouth close around his throat, and he could do nothing to stop it. He could not even feel his arms or legs. He was not sure if they were still attached, or laying somewhere in the parking lot like the parts of his partner. Suddenly, he was weightless, as if flying through the air, suspend but out of the animal's reach. Then, just as suddenly, he hit the ground. He heard his head crack against the asphalt but could do nothing. A brief flash of pain, and darkness overtook him.An immeasurable amount of time passed in darkness. Flashes of light and voices from strangers momentarily brought him from the darkness, but it was fleeting. He heard someone telling him to hold on, telling him help was on the way. He was still alive, he knew that much, and the words somehow sank into his brain and his heart, giving him permission to let go. It was a feeling of relief really, being able to let go and let nature take its course. A sharp stabbing pain brought him back briefly as he felt himself being lifted."Hold on, officer." He heard the voice as if it was already inside his head, as if he were talking to himself. But the voice was soothing, and he let go, allowing the darkness to take over him once more, like a warm blanket on a cold night.

Hope you enjoyed this scene. If you would like to get to know this new character, Raif Lungren, you can find him as one of the main characters in the aformentioned story.

Also, I am in the process of outlining a short story involving Raif, his transformation, and promotion to Police Detective. I would offer this story free like my historical fantasy about Azra in China "The Fifth Beauty."

WIP Wednesday

In this scene, Joseph decides to go to the Pink Pony and see Paulina (Alexis). He's still confused about her pushing him away the night before when he thought they were making progress and getting ready to become intimate.

Now, he walks right into another situation because Norman "Knuckles" Taylor is at the bar, and he wants desperately to take the man in. I'll explain here in case I did not post the prior scene. Previously, Joseph went back to the bond office and was given a skip ticket for none other than Norman "Knuckles" Taylor. Only thing is, Knuckles is a big time player in the local crime underworld, and noboby really thinks he can be brought in. Joe takes the skip because Knuckles' bail is set at a cool million dollars. This means that Joseph's cut would be one hundred thousand dollars.

By sundown the next day, Joe couldn't stand it any more. He had to see Paulina. He had to know why she suddenly pushed him away the night before. Was it something he did? He wasn't ready to confront her at the Pink Pony, but figured she'd be working, and besides, he may just find Knuckles there. He needed to make some progress on cornering the thug, and he wasn't going to do it chasing some woman around.He saw Knuckles as soon as he walked into the Pink Pony. The man sat at a large round table in front of the stage, surrounded by his bodyguards. Paulina stood in front of him with her order form in her hand. He said something to her, and she held her hand up, shaking it as a gesture of saying no. He said something else to her, Joe couldn't quite make out through the noise in the bar, and she put a hand on her hip while pointing a finger at him. She looked upset, but she wasn't yelling loud enough for him to make out her words. Knuckles said something else to her and she flipped him off."Fuck you," Joe heard her say this time, over the din in the bar.She turned to walk away, but she must not have seen Knuckles' cronies get up from the table and walk around behind her when she flipped him off. Sam stood behind the bar, watching everything but not doing a damn thing. Knuckles reached forward and grabbed Paulina's arm, yanking her violently into his lap. That's when instinct took over, and Joe sprung to action.He ran directly to the table using his momentum to smash his arm into the head of one of the thugs moving in on Paulina. The thug flew into the man beside him, their heads clunking like empty coconuts before they both fell to the floor with a thud, like a fifty-pound sack of flour. The third man was pulling his arm back, getting ready to pop Joe in the head, but it was too late, Joe swept his leg around and caught the man at the knee. He went down like the other two, falling into a table and breaking it, sending glasses and customers flying. He turned and prepared to face down Knuckles. He was already moving when he heard the faint but distinct sound of a hammer being drawn back and clicking into place. He stopped, dead in his tracks. Knuckles had one hand around Paulina's neck, and the other around a handgun. Oddly enough, Paulina didn't look scared in the least little bit. She looked angry, something animal in her eyes. She had the same look he thought he'd seen from her in the alley the night he brought Lefty into the station. Only this time, fighting back could get her a bullet in her chest, and Knuckles' file suggested he wouldn't hesitate to pull the trigger. On top of all that, he was smart enough to lawyer up and claim self defense. If he hadn't already jumped bail, he'd probably walk, but Paulina wouldn't.Joe backed away, bringing his hands up over his head. The other three thugs were getting up, and he knew they were going to get some retaliatory punches in on him since Knuckles had a gun aimed at him. He could take the three of them out. Knuckles held the gun in his right hand, to the side of Paulina, exposed, and vulnerable to attack. He could reach his left hand forward with his finger extended, catching the hammer in the webbing between his finger and thumb. He could follow it with his right palm into Knuckles' nose, rendering him useless, or possibly, dead. He couldn't do dead; he needed the money for bringing him. He knew he couldn't stop Knuckles and his three goons at one time. No, he was going to have to take a few punches, and try to snatch Paulina away somewhere in the confusion, shoving her safely away from the gun poking into her side.He looked at Paulina, trying to send her some kind of mental message, hoping she could see his plan in his eyes. She didn't look scared in the least little bit. In fact, she had a look in her eyes that was predatory. Her eyes even seemed to glow, as if they picked up some unseen light source and reflected it back. He wondered if she had a plan, although, if she did, he feared for her even more. Especially, if her plan was anything like the one she had with Lefty.The first blow came to his midsection. They were going right for the kidneys, but he reflexively bent over to absorb as much of the punch as he could. The second punch landed squarely on his jaw, just as he anticipated. With that, he stood back up, straight into the arms of the two thugs standing on either side of him. As they grabbed onto his shoulders, he used them as leverage to kick his left foot up, knocking the gun out of Knuckles' hand. The gun flew off somewhere behind him. Another punch came to his kidneys, and he wasn't quite ready for it, a deep grunt escaping him.Knuckles suddenly released Paulina, pushing her off to the side as he moved forward to get his licks in. Joe took the two punches to his ribs, but he was more concerned with Paulina. The punches made him bend forward, more grunts surely giving his opponents a thrill, but he straightened after each punch and looked for Paulina. She had moved out of sight, probably standing beside the bartender behind the bar. Knuckles squeezed his hand around Joe's neck, and moved close to him, talking in a whisper."If I ever see you again, I'll fuck you up." His breath reeked of whiskey and cigarettes. "You understand me, boy?"Joe said nothing, and it took all of his restraint not to head butt Knuckles, and lay out his thug buddies. No one called him 'boy' if they wanted to live. Besides, there were only four of them, all bunched up against him. Hell, he could take them out two at a time, but for now anyway, he needed to just stand there and take an ass whooping. He couldn't take a chance on this thing turning into a gunfight, and there was no doubt, they'd all go to guns if he started kicking their asses.Knuckles stepped back, looking at him, sizing him up. Joe gave him nothing except some feigned struggling against the two losers holding him by the arms. Knuckles slapped him hard across his face, another thing that would get him killed if the situation were different. The sucker punch landed next, right to his midsection. Joe absorbed the punch but exaggerated the pain, allowing his knees to buckle. Knuckles turned to retrieve his gun, and his two goons dropped Joe to the floor, stepping over him as they followed. The third goon got one last kick into his gut as he stepped over him. His posse reassembled, Knuckles left the bar.Joe waited until the door shut behind Knuckles and his gang to stand up. Paulina ran out from behind the bar and toward him. He was happy, thinking his act of heroism would convince her to finally explain herself to him, lower her guard and admit her feelings for him. He was certainly ready to admit his feelings for her. He opened his arms as she approached, waiting for to jump into him with a big thankful hug. Instead, she stopped short and slapped him over the same cheek Knuckles slapped earlier. Her slapped stunned him. He stood motionless and confused as she pointed a finger at him, and started a rant he would probably never figure out."What the hell did you think you were doing?" Paulina seemed genuinely pissed, not at all thankful. "They were giving me great tips."Joe could do nothing. There simply was no way to respond."I'm so sick of you showing up and trying to play hero. I'm sick of you walking around thinking everyone needs to be saved."Something gave Joe the sinking feeling she was just getting started."I can take care of myself, you know. I had the situation under control.""Yeah," he said. "I like the way you controlled that gun pointed at you, and some thug practically having his way with you right in the middle of the bar." He realized it was wrong to say it, but it just slipped out.Paulina fell silent. The whole bar became silent, even the music had stopped, as if they were in some surreal spaghetti western, and the gunfighter just challenged someone in the saloon. Paulina opened her mouth to speak, her finger still pointing at him, and he prepared himself for the onslaught."You know, Joe, you're an asshole." Paulina didn't look mad anymore, she looked like she was about to cry. "Just get out," she said. "Get out the bar, and get out of my life." She turned, and ran behind the bar and through the doors to the kitchen.There was nothing left for him to do, but leave. The entire bar was silent, every eye upon him. Without another word, he left the bar, half-expecting Knuckles and his thugs to be waiting for him outside. May have been waiting for him but luck was on his side. They were too busy discussing something in the parking lot. Joe found, in his experience, every failure presented in itself, opportunities for future success. Joe stepped into the shadows and quietly waited. With luck, Knuckles would give him the opportunity he was looking for.

Hope you enjoyed this week's work in progress post. I may skip ahead in the coming weeks as I complete the draft and begin the initial edit. After finishing the first edit, I'll send the entire manuscript out to anyone willing to read and comment on the project. I'm willing to take whatever feedback I can get, from grammar comments to story concept, character development or overall feeling of the story. Thanks for joining this week.

Until next week, then...

Giving It All Away

I happy to announce I am participating in Read an Ebook Week by offering all my works FREE at smashwords.

Just follow this LINK and enter coupon code RE100 at checkout.

Hope everyone takes advantage of this, and reads at least one new ebook this week!

WIP Wednesday

This week I skip ahead again to a pivotal scene that relieves some of the tension I'd built up in the previous chapter.

I end the previous chapter with Leonidas discovering that Alexis continued on the bus to Montgomery, Alabama. He is now getting ready to drive there and collect her up to be his mate, whether she agrees or not.

Before he makes it out of Atlanta, he receives a call from Ellijay with bad news. The news puts the brakes on his quest and prompts him to shift into wolf form. His actions will ultimately create a secret he must keep, along with a game-changer for Dimitri, who wants his granddaughter back without the condition of ritual mating with the future pack alpha.

Enjoy:

The moon disappeared and reappeared behind tall buildings as Leonidas walked to his car. It would be full in a few days."Full moon rising," he said to himself, and chuckled under his breath.He'd always found it amusing how mortals, and even some ferals, thought a werewolf was somehow tied to the moon. The moon guided him no more than anything else but he did need the full moon for the mating ritual, and he planned to be mated to Alexis in just a few days, with or without his father's blessing.It would be easier to wait till morning, get a fresh start to Montgomery, but he didn't want to wait. He'd checked a map and found Montgomery was only about three hours West on Interstate eighty-five. It would be better to get there tonight, find the bus station first thing in the morning. Alexis would be back to Ellijay by tomorrow afternoon, or He'd find a way to get her ostracized from the pack. If that didn't work, he'd find a way to make her dead.His cell phone rang as he was pulling into traffic."Leonidas, it's Paul. I'm afraid I've got some news."Leo threw the phone from his ear. It landed on the seat next to him and he could still hear the pack doctor talking on the other end."Leo ... Leo? You still there?" came from the phone in a minuscule, tinny voice.Whatever the doctor had to say, he didn't want to hear it. Leo pulled to the side of the street and took a deep breath. He was prepared for bad news, but there was always the chance the doctor was just calling to tell him his father's health was improving. But Leonidas knew the doctor wouldn't be calling him with good news. For that, he'd wait until he returned. Leo gathered his strength, and hesitantly reached for the cell phone."What is it, doc.""It's about your father, Leo," the doctor's voice sounded hushed on the phone. The kind of voice doctors always use when they give bad news to family members."Don't say it," Leo yelled into the phone."He passed sometime last night.""Damn it, I know," he yelled back, his voice starting to crack as his vision blurred."You didn't have to tell me.""You need to come home, Leonidas.""I'm on my way." Leo ended the call and threw his phone away. It bounced off the roof and cracked the passenger window before landing right back beside him on the seat.I should have been there.Leo fought through a torment of conflicting emotions as he mindlessly pulled into traffic and drove. Lights from oncoming traffic blinded him, appearing as sunburst, cutting harshly through the darkness.I should have listened to him.He drove. Leo drove blindly through the streets of downtown Atlanta, unaware of his surroundings, not caring where he went. Just driving, running. He fought hard against a rage building within himself. It was the only emotion he knew, and the most dangerous. He struggled to contain a building howl, a shifting. There was no outlet for his rage. He was in his car amongst a city of mortals, like an animal locked in a cage. He found himself driving along a dark street, some kind of park out his driver's side window. The need was too great. He slammed on his brakes, sliding sideways into a parking spot.The shift came within three steps of the car, and the wolf ran into the darkness. The wolf ran blindly down deserted park pathways along a lake, tears wetting the fur along the sides of its face. The wolf ran, stopping only to sniff the air for any creature to hunt down.

Hope you enjoyed this scene. I will continue to skip ahead on scenes as I am in the process of finishing the draft now. For those interested, I'm now in the process of looking for Beta-readers after my project goes through the first edit. As always, comments and critiques are welcome.

WIP Wednesday

Put your seat belts on, fair readers, this is going to take awhile. This week I am combining two scenes. The first scene is in Joe's point of view, as he visits Alexis at the club, ending in a second date at the local all-night restaurant. The second scene is from Lexi's point of view. She's asked him back to her apartment (trailer) with every intention of seducing him. Problem is that she's never actually seduced a man, or even been with a man before, and begins to shift against her will.

Enjoy,

A few customers started filtering into the bar, so Joe left the bar stool, and found himself a table toward the back of the bar, where he could see the the door and the stage without being noticed. Paulina came in with Becky right behind her. They both went directly to the bar and talked to Sam. He wondered if Sam would have the balls to bring up the prospect of dancing to Paulina. Obviously not, since Paulina and Becky found his table and sat down with him. Becky left her chap stick tube on his tabletop, and her purse over the back of a chair, when she left to change. He noticed, Paulina didn't have a purse with her, odd for a woman not to have a purse."What brings you back here tonight, Joe?" Paulina had a sly look on her face. She sipped a Coke through a straw, her upward turned lips indicating she was happy to see him. "You on the job, or are you unemployed at the moment?""I'm always on the job." He wasn't sure he wanted to tell her he was going to bring in Knuckles--not yet, anyway.She smiled at him, and left the table to serve some new costumers. Joe sat at the table, watching Paulina move from one table to another, filling orders, putting a halt to the advances of drunken amorous men. He watched the front entrance, for Knuckles or any of his stooges. He watched the back exit door into the alleyway for anyone sneaking out to warn him. Knuckles never showed himself, and as far as Joe knew, none of his stooges showed themselves either. He managed to nurse just three drinks during Paulina's entire work shift. Paulina teased him when she brought his second drink, calling it a virgin rum and coke.Sam made last call, and started ushering customers out the door. Paulina came to his table, sitting in the chair opposite him to count her tips."Busy night?" He asked Paulina as she stacked quarters in a row."Looks like I made enough in tips to spend twenty minutes at the arcade," she said. "I'm surprised how many customers leave a tip of pocket change, and lint balls."Joe leaned back in his chair, rubbing his chin, and thinking of the best approach to mention what Sam had talked to him about earlier. He wasn't much motivated to mention it at all. Although, the prospect of nabbing Knuckles without a fight worked for him financially."I wonder how Becky does in tips." He thought talking about Becky might give him an idea of how she felt about dancing. "At least, she gets paid in dollars, instead of quarters."I'm sure she does well, Paulina said. "She was a professional dancer in Vegas, you know, but I wouldn't be caught dead on that pole in a million years.""Are you shy?" Joe was ready to change the subject, and he sensed she was uncomfortable talking to him about it too."Me?" Paulina pointed to herself with an exaggerated expression. "Showing a little skin doesn't bother me, but I'd die of embarrassment if anyone saw me try to dance. There's no way anybody could get me on that stage. I'll stick to serving drinks and flirting with customers, thank you very much."Paulina convinced him that the thought of her dancing was a dead end, and that was just fine. Besides, he was already starting to feel like he might just be a little uncomfortable with the thought of strange men gawking at her while she danced, mostly naked, on a stage."How would you like to get some coffee again tonight?" He said, thinking it was time to change the subject. "Maybe we can find someplace a little nicer tonight."Paulina put a finger to her mouth, and looked up in an exaggerated expression of thinking, then said. "I'll go with you under one condition.""You're going put conditions on free coffee?" He said, and laughed."Yes, I like conditions," she said. "How about, this time we go without Becky.""Deal."Paulina left the table to go talk to Becky, and waited for her by the door. Sam looked at him so many times, it was beginning to make him uncomfortable. He was sure Sam was curious whether he talked to her about dancing or not. Sam was just going to have to hoist his balls up and ask her himself if he was so determined."Wow, looks like you're getting classier with each date," Paulina said, as He angled the truck into a parking space. "International House of Pancakes for a second date. I can't imagine where we'd go next, Olive Garden?" She laughed, but brought her hand over to meet his on the seat."I'm sorry, but this is the best I can do with the hours we keep." Joe opened his door and slid out of the seat, running over to open her door.He followed her into the restaurant, opening the door for her, and then running past her to open the second door. She sat across from him in a cozy booth that was long enough to easily fit at least six adults. He was a little surprised when she ordered steak and eggs, the steak as rare as the waitress told her the restaurant could legally serve. He ordered eggs with country ham and red eye gravy with grits on the side. Paulina engaged him in idle chit-chat while they waited for their food, asking him if he'd always lived here, and if he liked NASCAR, and what college football team he supported. He kept the conversation light by telling her that NASCAR was for Georgians, and Alabamians didn't decide which college football team they supported, they were born a fan of Alabama or Auburn. They fell quiet when the food came, their only communication becoming the cutting of meat, and the occasional request for salt.Paulina was the first to break the silence after the plates were taken away and replaced with coffee cups."So, Joe," she said. "Did you really come into the bar tonight for me, or are you on the hunt for another criminal?""Mostly because of you." He didn't want to tell her he was after biggest crime boss in the state. "Besides, my criminal never showed up."Paulina fell silent again. Every time he looked across the table at her, she was staring at him, a look in her eyes like she was sizing him up, or considering another question. He busied himself by ruffling through the bills in his wallet, pretending he was deciding on how much to tip the waitress. Paulina got his attention when she said, "Well, I guess the date's over." He suddenly realized he'd already laid cash on the table, blanketing the bill."Oh, no." He said." I'm sorry, it's just a habit to pay the bill as soon as it comes.""That's okay," Paulina winked at him. "Our date doesn't have to be over." She reached over the table and placed her hand on top of his. "We could get another cup of coffee at my place.""Okay," was all he could think to say."Let's go," she said.He slid out the booth and took her hand, wondering if she could see the anticipation written all over him. It was all he could do to keep from breaking the posted speed limit on the drive to her apartment.
* * *
All the way back to her place, Lexi wondered just what she'd gotten herself into. She had no experience with men, but Joe was different. She liked him. She wanted him, and she wanted this to happen. She was ready. Joe parked the truck in front of the single-wide trailer she called home, and she waited while he ran around the front of the truck to open her door. He followed her to the wooden steps that led to the door, and held a small pen flashlight for her while she unlocked the door, fumbling nervously as she tried to fit the key into the door.As they went through the door, she felt Joe's hand on her back. Then, he wrapped his other arm around her from behind, and pulled her into him, turning her until she faced him, theirs lips nearly touching. Her knees nearly gave way, as the intensity of their first kiss pulsed from her lips and saturated her entire body. She knew Joe would not let her fall, he was holding her so tight, she felt her feet may already be off the floor. She suddenly realized her loss of control, and wide-eyed fear replaced blind lust. What if she lost control, and shifted? That would not be good for Joe. He'd proven himself strong and fast but all that was nothing compared to what she would become. She feared he would react violently, and in her animal state, she might kill him. That certainly wouldn't be a good start for their relationship."How about that coffee?" Lexi pushed against Joe's chest, and squirmed out of his arms, her body immediately cold and wanting the warmth of him again."Sure," he said, his eyebrows furrowed, and his head shaking left to right in what could only be confusion.Now, she wasn't even sure why she invited him back for coffee. She didn't even own a coffee pot. But, she didn't want to lose him. He was the first man she ever felt this way about, and it was all too confusing, especially with the other secrets she had to keep from him."Uh, I only have instant. You okay with that?" A sudden fear overwhelmed her again. She feared he might sense her apprehension and leave."Instant is fine," Joe said. "That's what I drink at home, anyway."She filled a teapot with water, put it on the stove, and sat down beside Joe on the small couch."Now, where were we?" She said, as she leaned into him, bringing her arms up around his muscular shoulders.Their lips touched, and electricity spread through her body like a wildfire. There were parts of her body responding to his touch, she'd never even knew existed. A trail of heat, and fire, and electricity followed every movement of his big hands moving slowly, gently over her clothes. He moved his hands along her back, upwards across her shoulders, and down her arms, until he found her hands, holding them securely within his. He broke their kiss, moving away from her just far enough to look her directly in the eyes. His eyes were intense, dark, and possessive. The eyes of an Alpha, for sure.The look in her eyes made her want him even more, and she leaned into him, diving into luxurious warmth of his kiss again. A little voice inside her head started its protest. The voice said this could never be. The voice peeped that she could not have a human. She moaned into Joe's mouth, ignoring the voice.The fire and electricity intensified, as Joe's hands moved back up her arms and shoulders, all the way to the bottoms of her earlobes, before plunging down her to the middle of her spine. He pulled at her blouse until it freed itself from the hem of her jeans. A flash of fire and need shot to her core as she felt Joe's bare hands on the skin of her back, working their way upwards until reaching the clasp of her bra. The voice now echoed warnings, as if yelled from a distant mountain, but she ignored it. She felt Joe working the at the clasps with both hands, but she was ruled by his kiss, and that was all that mattered. She let him work at her bra, willing him to work faster.The first clasp came free, then the second, bringing with it, a rush of want and anticipation as she felt her large breasts give way to gravity. As  Joe moved his hands around her sides and over her breasts, the voice was washed away in her pleasure, but she felt the unmistakable feeling of her hair growing and thickening on her arms, a kind of tingling, stinging sensation that was not pleasant by any measure. The voice was suddenly back, now screaming a warning that she was going somewhere she could not come back from. She'd never been with a human before. Hell, she'd never been with anyone. The voice became a torrent of noise, as she felt those little changes inside her signaling a slow change in her form. The screaming turned to a whistle, and she realized the water was boiling on the stove."Wait," she said, as she pushed away from Joe. "Stop."Joe looked at her, confusion in his eyes, his hands still cupping her breasts."We can't do this. Not now." She heard herself saying the words, but they sounded as if someone else was saying them. She was confused. She wanted him, but fear overcame her. Not a fear of losing her virginity, but a fear of the unknown--of what she might do to him. The teapot whistled on the stove, creating a confusing cacophony of noise, clouding her thoughts. Despite her best efforts to hold back, she still felt the changes coming within her. Was she going to shift uncontrollably, right in front him? She'd had full control of her shift since she was nine years old. Why was she suddenly unable to control anything?"You have to go," she yelled at Joe as she back away and jumped up from the couch."But, why?" Joe said. "It's okay, we can just talk.""No!" she snapped back at him. "Just go." Her vision was already becoming blurred with her own tears. "Just go now." she said, quieter this time, as she turned away from him, and pulled the teapot off the burner.Lexi didn't turn around until she heard Joe walk out and shut the door, his footsteps thumping down the wooden steps. All those little signs inside her went away--her shift was not going to come. It wasn't until she heard the truck rumble to life, throwing gravel as Joe sped away, that she allowed herself to cry. It came in waves so intense, she had to sit back down on the couch and hold her head in her hands. She knew now that she was falling in love with Joe--with a human. She knew that it was a love that simply could not be. She couldn't let it happen.Defeated and heartbroken, she wondered if she would be better off just going back to Ellijay with her tail between her legs and accepting her preordained mating to Leonidas. Her birthright doomed her to a life of compromise and servitude. Her selfish independence only allowed her to see the life she would never have.

Hope you enjoyed these two scenes combined together this week. I know it was rather long, but I may be combining scenes or skipping scenes in an attempt to actually display a good representation of all chapters before the novel goes to editing and betas.

Compare and Contrast

I've been watching a new show on the SciFi channel on Sunday nights. It's called "Lost Girl" and, I swear someone read my novel, Lovestruck Succubus and stole many elements of my character for the television show.

Okay, I'm coming out and accusing anybody of anything here, but the similarities are striking.
In the television show, Bo (the main character) is a Succubus who feeds off men through sex (well, just kisses, since it is television, after all) with fatal results. My Succubus, Azra, feeds off men for her very survival. She needs their energy like a mortal needs food.
Bo, the television Succubus, found herself a love interest that she manages to not kill, a Werewolf. Oddly enough, Azra, my Succubus, finds a Werewolf boyfriend, who, like the television show, happens to be a police detective-go figure! Of course, my Succubus actually tries to kill the detective, unaware that he is a Werewolf, only to shift into his form.
Okay, so maybe that's where many of the similarities end. My Succubus, has the ability to shape shift into a womanly form the man she is with finds most desirable. She is not looking for her parents, but she is trying to break the bonds of a highly regimented society with a tyrant for a leader.

Also, in my story, her kind (demons) actually created Werewolves many millenia ago, in an attempt to rid the Earth of mortals. Of course, she does not know this. Only her clan leaders know this, and they're angry that it didn't work. Now her own clan leader is even angrier that she's fallen in love with one of them.
But don't take my word for it. Watch the television show, and read my novel, then decide for yourself if those darn television writers stole my idea.

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