Mick Mooney's Blog, page 7

3 things to remember about your Christian experience

1. You’re doing enough.

There isn’t a standard to-do list to complete, faith doesn’t work that way. Rather, it’s a spiritually entwined experience with God. You’re doing enough, because whatever you do, you do it with the Lord.

So don’t worry. Relax. Breathe easy, and enjoy the walk with your Creator.

2. You believe.

You really do, that’s for sure. Others might doubt, but who cares, right? You job is not to convince others you believe, it’s simply to believe.

So don’t worry. Relax. Breathe easy, and enjoy the walk with your Creator.

3. You are being led.

The Holy Spirit is not a commander who stands behind you pointing and giving you orders to do something (that is how the Old Covenant law operated), the Holy Spirit is leading you. That means he is in front of you, and you are following. Yes, you’re following, and it’s a good thing to trust that’s what is happening, because it is.

So don’t worry. Relax. Breathe easy, and enjoy the walk with your Creator.

It is always easier to be doubters. Doubting other people’s beliefs. Doubting if they do enough, or know enough theology; doubting if they follow the Spirit. The thing is, we are not called Doubters, we’re called Believers, so it really does help to outlive your life from this perspective. Not only for your own Christian walk, but also when you think about your brothers and sisters who are on the same walk with your heavenly Father.

What do you think? Are there any of the points you agree/disagree with? Should something else be added to the list?

Ah Yes, The Bible ‘Experts’… Jesus Knew A Few Of Them Too

Comic by David Hayward. For more of his comics visit: Nakedpastor.com

It’s interesting the way some of the religious leaders in the gospel accounts were called ‘experts in the law’. This means they were the go-to-guys when you had a Bible question.

They studied the Bible.

They quoted the Bible.

They taught the Bible.

They were consumed with the Bible.

Oh, and just as a side note, they didn’t understand the message God was actually trying to say to them!

But, what does that matter – they were the ‘experts.’ They had the best seats in the Synagogue to prove it, too.

Jesus was an incredible person, that goes without saying. But what is often overlooked is how often he went against the popular act of the day to elevate the Bible to a God like status. Jesus obviously valued the Scriptures. But he valued them for what they were, not what they weren’t.

So what was the value of the Scriptures to Jesus? It was that through them his coming was prophesied and the promise of the new covenant of the Spirit was proclaimed. The ‘experts in the law’ however, had so much of their own well built up Bible theology in their heads, they had no room for the truth of the Scriptures!

In Jesus’ own words…

“You diligently study the Scriptures because you think that by them you possess eternal life. These are the Scriptures that testify about me, yet you refuse to come to me to have life.” John 5:39-40

Imagine the Spirit of God talking to you, but you can’t hear what he’s saying, because your head is consumed with the Bible. This is what happened to so many in Jesus’ day. He’s right there. They could hear his voice, but they weren’t listening, because he was saying things that didn’t make sense in context to their their own interpretations of the Bible.

The Sermon On The Mount is one of the most quoted parts of Jesus’ ministry. But strangely enough, it’s often quoted for the wrong reason. The quoted to raise awareness of Jesus’ moral teachings, but in actual fact it raises much more awareness of just how radical Jesus was – so radical, he dared to interpret the Bible in a way that was completely unacceptable to the ‘experts.’

Most people don’t realise how controversial Jesus was by giving his ‘Sermon On The Mount.’ Throughout it he gives several examples that basically go like this:

“You’ve heard it said (in the Bible) but now I say (by my word/Spirit)”

By making this statement, Jesus was not only revealing the true voice we should be listening to (the Spirit of Christ in us) but also daring to dismiss parts of the Bible completely.

So, what did the ‘experts in the Bible’ think about that? Were they amazed at the profound revelation Jesus was sharing with them… not quite…

What! How dare Jesus! That’s the Bible Jesus! You can’t change it! That’s heresy! Let’s organise to kill him! He deserves to die! How dare he try to say that about the Bible! Crucify him!

If Jesus were still walking the earth today, I wonder how many of us would act like Peter, and not only disagree with what Jesus was saying, but actually feel that we, as the experts, had to rebuke him!

Jesus spoke plainly about this, and Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him. Mark 8:32

If we want to follow Jesus, we’ve got to go all in. This means we have to be prepared for the fact that he is going to rock our theology, our Bible knowledge, our understanding of God continually. The truth is, as followers of Christ, we never become ‘experts’ – we become like children. We trust. We follow.

Don’t try to become a ‘expert in the Bible’… rather, practice hearing the voice within you. The voice of your beloved. The voice of your good Shepherd.

Remember, walking with Jesus is an adventure in life, not a Bible study in our heads. Be brave. Follow him.

— Mick Mooney (@mick_mooney) August 17, 2012

Love is built to last

Love will outrun everything else. When every other negative act and emotion has fallen to the waste-side, exhausted and empty of energy, love will continue. Love is built to last.

Caught In A Storm – Advice For A Friend

A man was hiking over the beautiful snowy Alps, along the way a violent storm suddenly appeared and the man had no chance to take shelter, he was trapped right in the eye of the storm. The snow storm was so intense that he could not see a thing; he could not even see his hand in front of his face. In desperation he tried to use his mobile phone, and to his amazement he could still get phone reception to make a phone call. He called a close friend, he did not know what his friend could possible do for him, but in hope he called anyway.

His friend, reading one of his favourite books in front of the open fire and his lovely wife preparing dinner for him, picked up the phone. On the other end of the phone he listened to his friend share his emotions, his fear and confusion, he was walking aimlessly in the worst storm he has ever been caught in, and he had no idea how he would make his way through it.

“Just walk east!” his friend yelled down the phone. “Just walk east! If you just walk east you will easily get out of the storm!”

However, the friend in the storm could not see a thing, only a blur, he was confused, he was already aware that if he walked east he would find shelter from the storm, he wasn’t arguing that. His problem was he had no idea which way east was. He could not see anything! He was completely incapable of doing anything to get himself out of the storm.

He tried to explain this to his friend, but his friend just keep yelling to him ‘just walk east!’ His friend, warm and comfortable at home, could not understand why his friend could not do this one simple thing ‘Just walk east!’

Meanwhile his friend was still stuck in a situation he was incapable of changing. He tried to explain that he was not arguing that walking east is what he should do; his problem was he did not know how to walk east. Which way was east? West? North? South? He was trapped, nothing was in his control, he did not know what to do, and his friends advise, although well meaning, was only creating more fear in his heart.

“Just walk east! Stop making excuses and just start walking east and you will find shelter from the storm.” His friend yelled again, getting more frustrated. Eventually, his friend hung up the phone and thought to himself: ‘You can’t help someone who won’t help themselves’. Warm and safe in his lovely home, his friend picked his book back up and continued to enjoy his evening.

Meanwhile his friend was left in the storm. He was lonely, fearful, and hopeless. He continued to wander, and the storm just kept getting worst. He felt so depressed, so misunderstood, so lost. In desperation he decided to try to call another friend, what could his other friend do for him? He did not know, but in hope he called.

As his friend picked up the phone the man began to retell his situation; he cried, he was broken, he was trapped in the storm, he could not do anything, he could not escape or find shelter.

“Remember you are not alone” his friend yelled down the phone. “What ever you do don’t forget you are not alone!”

The man stood in the storm, the tried to understand what his friend was trying to tell him, what did he mean? His friend continued in desperation to remind him that he was not alone. “What do you mean I’m not alone?” his friend cried? “I’m completely alone. I’m in a storm and I have no power to change anything and I’m incapable of finding my way out.”

The whole time he spoke to his friend, never once did his friend try to give him instructions on how he could get out of the storm in his own strength, his friend just keep reminding him he was not alone. Again the man asked his friend “What do you mean I’m not alone?”

“Remember when you started the journey across the mountains” his friend said, “Do you remember when the weather was beautiful and calm?” His friend thought back, yes he remembered! “Do you remember you did not start this journey on your own?” Again his friend thought back, yes he remembered! He remembered that he started the journey with a guide, a seasoned mountain guide. He started the journey with a professional guide who knew every corner of the mountain, who had guided other climbers through storms even worst than the one he was trapped in now.

“Do you remember you’re not alone?” His friend cried down the phone once more. “Yes I remember!” The man said. He remembered he started the journey with a guide. His friend keep encouraging him “Remember that your guide is still with you! He’s still right beside you, he has not left you. Let him take hold of you hand and he will lead you out of the storm.”

The man hung up the phone. He held out his hand and cried out for his guide to lead him to safety. He could not see anything, he could not see his guide, he could only have faith his guide did not leave him when the storm began. As he stood in the storm, completely blind and unable to help himself, he felt the beautiful hand of the one he knew could save him from the storm; it was his guide.

His guide was still with him. When the storm first began, it had taken the man by such surprise and had come upon him so suddenly that, in his fear and confusion, he forgot his guide was still with him.

“I don’t know the way out” the man cried to his guide. He felt the guide embrace him, in the deathly cold of the storm he held him close, it made him feel a deep warmth inside himself, a warmth he almost forgot existed. The guides warm embrace comforted the man, and his heart felt strengthened, even in the storm.

The storm was so heavy the man still could not see the face of his guide, he could not see anything, he only heard the voice of his guide, the one who was capable of doing what we could not do, the only one who could save him.

The man could not see anything, he felt so weak, and in himself there was no strength left. He could only rely upon his guide and believe in his weakness, his guide would be his strength. As the storm continued to rage all around them, the man heard the guide whisper into his ear:

“You don’t need to know the way out, you only need to trust me, I can lead you to safety”

In that moment the man felt peace in his heart. Yes he was still in the very same storm, but he knew he would make it through the storm, because even in his weakness, his guide was strong enough to carry him through to safety.

Why is it when our friends face an emotional storm in their life we always want to instruct them on how they can fix the problem themselves?

“Just let it go!”

Seems like such simple advice to give someone who is heart broken from a relationship breakdown.

“Why don’t you just let it go, and move on with your life?”

Sometime we spend all our time trying to instruct our heartbroken and depressed friends on how they must lead themselves out of heartbreak and disappointment, and with our best intentions we only cause them to feel more broken. In contrast, the greatest help we can be as a friend is to remind them that within their heartbreak, within their sadness, within their inability to change their feeling and their situation, Jesus is still with them, still loves them, is still embracing them, and is still the one who will save them and heal their heart.

Within the heartbroken sadness they are suffering in, a true friend reminds them that their guide is still with them. Their guide has never left them, and they don’t need to worry about finding their own way out of their emotional crisis, they need only to trust that Jesus is with them. Always remember Jesus. It is Jesus who desires to strengthen our hearts through the storm. It is Jesus, and not ourselves who leads us; not through our strength, but through his grace given freely to us in our time of need.

Jesus is our saviour for our whole life, in this life and the eternal life. When we are unable to save ourselves in any situation, and our friends and family can not possible understand the emotional crisis we are facing in our life, Christ understands.

People will always try to instruct us on how to save ourselves, Christ however, shows us his desire is to save us and lead us in his strength.

Christ whispers into our ear that we need not try frantically to be the strong one, but to lean upon Him in our weakness

— Mick Mooney (@mick_mooney) June 30, 2012

He is our guide, he is our strength, He is always with us, and he will be faithful to lead us to safety.

I pray that I’m always a friend that reminds you that your guide is still with you, and he will lead you through the storm, He loves you, He is with you, when nobody understands, the Lord understands.

“Do you remember you’re not alone?” His friend cried down the phone once more. “Yes I remember!” The man said, he remembered he started the journey with a guide! His friend keep encouraging him “Remember that your guide is still with you! He’s still right beside you, he has not left you! Let him take hold of you hand and he will lead you out of the storm!”

“Hate The Hypocrisy, Love The Hypocrite”: A Short Story

“But why do you feel insulted?” Tony asked his friend Larry.

“Because, the speaker called my a hypocrite!”

“He wasn’t talking specifically about you. It was more about all Christians in general.”

“How dare he!” Larry responded. “Who does he think he is?”

This wasn’t how Tony imagined things would turn out. He had invited Larry along to one of his atheist meetings and really thought he would enjoy it. There was a great community there, lots of acceptance, some good music. Perhaps Larry might even start to question the possibility of their being no god. But, somehow, Larry felt more offended than inspired.

Apparently, he was upset by the speaker, who wanted to talk about Christians. He explained to the atheist audience that just because Christians were hypocrites, that didn’t mean they should be despised. No, far from it. In fact that was the point of his message, that was titled: “Hate the hypocrisy, not the hypocrite.”

“Larry, the speaker was speaking about loving Christians. That was the point. Sure, you’re all hypocrites, but we still love you. Yes, we hate the hypocrisy, but we love the hypocrite!” Tony said with enthusiasm, but Larry looked all the more offended.

“That’s horrible. How can you say something like ‘hate the hypocrisy, love the hypocrite?’ I don’t even feel like you’re treating me as a human being! Just some dehumanized ‘hypocrite’ … that’s a terrible thing to say.”

Tony stood there, truly confused. Finally he asked Larry. “But, how exactly is that any different or more offensive than your pastor preaching to your church congregation to ‘hate the sin, but love the sinner?‘ when talking about me and my atheist friends?”

“Because,” Larry said, “Just… because!”

Where Do We Find God? A Short Story

“How can anyone know God?” Steve asked his uncle. It was another family get-together, and they were both enjoying a drink on the back patio. Out of all his relatives, his uncle Bob was the only one he could really talk to about God, and his lack of faith in him, without feeling judged. “I don’t believe it’s possible, that’s why I don’t believe at all.”

His uncle smiled. “Makes sense.”

“What does?”

“What you just said.”

“Come on, you can’t agree with me . . . you are a believer, aren’t you?”

“Yes, of course,” his uncle responded.

“So what gives? You can’t have it both ways. Either you believe, or you doubt.”

“Steve, I believe in God, because I see him in places you don’t.”

“What? God’s hiding from me but showing himself to you? Is that what you saying?”

“No, not at all. In fact, I’m sure you bump into God all the time, you just don’t know it – and that’s the point I’m making.”

“So – how are we different?”

“It’s just that we’re looking for God in different places, that’s why I find him everyday, and you haven’t found him at all, well,” his uncle said, “you have found him, actually, it’s just that you haven’t recognized that it’s him. You’re looking up into that great expanse in the sky, and your science books, and the cosmos that stretches billions of light years, and you give up. It’s all too big, too random, too unknown. You’re looking for God,” pointing to the stars, “up there, but that’s not where I look for him… that’s why I have an easier time finding him. ”

“Where are you looking for him, then?”

“In you, Steve, that’s where.” He pointed to Steve’s heart. “Right here, right now, I’m looking for God in you, and I found him too.”

“In me!” Steve retorted with shock. “I don’t even believe in God.”

“But he believes in you! One day you’ll get it, the mystery will make sense to you, that God loves you so much he’s already with you, and with me, and with everyone. You’re not looking for him in other people, but I do. You see, God is found in your brother, your mother, your neighbor, and everyone else that crosses your path. I want to walk with God, so I walk with others. I want to know God’s heart, get to know the hearts of others. I want more of God’s company,” raising his glass, he tilted it towards Steve, “so I enjoy the company of others as often as possible.”

Steve scrunched his face, thinking. “So . . . you believe God is found in other people?”

“If you have eyes to see it, yes I do,” his uncle leaned back and continued speaking. “We all naturally want to look ‘up’ when we want to find God, but you’ll find God quicker when you give up gazing heavenward, and instead spend your time looking ‘across’ from yourself, at those around you and let your heart interact with theirs . . . for God is found in the moments we let our hearts love one another.”

Steve laughed. The sun was setting and they heard someone call them inside for dinner. They stood up to join the rest of the family.

Steve put his arm on his uncle’s shoulder. “Well, I still don’t believe in God, but, if he does exist,” he paused for a moment and gave his uncle a heart warming smile, “I think I just caught a glimpse of him in you.”

Denying Religion To Live By Faith: A Short Story

“We have to deny ourselves Roy, we have to die to ourselves and carry our cross daily.”

“I agree, but I don’t see you denying yourself. From how you describe your faith, it sounds like you’re doing the exact opposite.”

“How can you say that? I do nothing but serve Christ,” Walter said as the two colleagues sat at the factory cafeteria. Ever since he found out Roy was a Christian he aimed to sit with him at lunch. But, in Walter’s opinion, Roy clearly misunderstood what it meant to be a Christian, and it both confused and annoyed him. He had taken up the challenge of helping Roy see the faults in his current Christian worldview. At first Roy just ate his lunch and listened gracefully, but lately he was beginning to challenge Walter back.

“Actually, you are just serving yourself, Walter. You’re serving your religious appetite. The appetite that is in all of us. Don’t you see that. If you really wanted to deny yourself you’d deny the desire for religion within you, the easy road, where you can have all the external signs God is with you. But do you really want to deny yourself for Christ? If you do, deny the religious desire in you and start living by your heart instead. Stop domesticating Jesus to fit into your programs, and stop with all the external activities to confirm you belong to God and he is pleased with you.”

“There’s nothing wrong with external rituals. Christ wants them too,” Walter said defensively.

Roy, threw his hands up in the air, exhaling loudly. One of his co workers looked over his shoulder at him before returning to their lunch. He took another mouthful of his sandwich, before continuing with his thoughts. “It seems we all have no problem molding Jesus into whatever form we want. Is that who Jesus is? Is that how he works? Is he like clay that we can mold as we want?”

“Of course not,” Walter replied.

“Then why do we do it, pleasing our own religious desires we’ve been born with, and all the while quoting the Bible that we are ‘denying ourselves.’ We’re doing the exact opposite! We’re not denying ourselves, we’re indulging in ourselves, in our religious desires and our religious addictions.”

“That’s crazy talk, Roy. Where do you come up with this nonsense? You’re just trying to make your own faith easy, that’s all.”

“Nonsense? I’ll tell what nonsense is. Turning Jesus into the kind of spiritual guru that is religiously & socially palatable is nonsense; but to accept him as the revolutionist he actually is, that’s not ‘easy’… that’s the part that takes real faith.”

Walter rolled his eyes. “Honestly Roy, sometimes I feel you look for any excuse to make Jesus out to be some kind of rebel against religion. But he’s nothing of the kind. Jesus himself loves religion, and he was some kind of hooligan like you talk about.”

“Oh, come on Walter, you can’t be serious,” Roy said. “you might not like what I have to say, but you can’t sit there and tell me Jesus was as conservative as you are, and your pastor, and everyone else that holds to your theology? Be real now. There has never been anyone more radical, confrontational & disruptive to the commonly held habits and doctrines of religion than Jesus. He didn’t place any hope in politics, nor did he spend his time criticizing other religions; rather, he confronted, challenged and presented a better alternative to his own religion. To end religion, and live our a life of faith in a new and living way. A way of the Spirit.”

“So what do you suggest? That we should live without religion?” Walter tried not to mock Roy, but he couldn’t resist. “OK wise one, how? How would we even start doing that?”

“You really want to know?”

“Of course, I’m all ears.”

“OK, here’s how. We could start by living our communal faith in a way that no longer depends on buildings or offerings, or on professional clergy and reoccurring ceremonies. We could stop worshiping the Bible, and instead actually develop our relationship with God in a way that depended on his voice within each of us. We could deny our religious addiction to written codes and stomping of the feet and reaching up to heaven with our hands. We could stop trying to save the world with our brand of Christianity. We could start by being connected by our hearts instead of church services. We could…”

“Enough Roy! I’ve heard enough.” Walter interrupted. He stood up. “I’ve got to go back to work, and I can tell that all you have to say is nonsense. It’s all dreams, that’s all. We need structure. We need paid pastors. We need church services, nothing will work without them.”

“What?” Roy replied, with a half-smile on his face. “You don’t have faith for it?”

“I’m a man of faith! And I’m sorry I asked for your opinion. I don’t need your wild ideas or foolish advice. I’m already giving everything for God.”

“Not everything,” Roy said. “Based on your reaction to this conversation, It looks like you’re still holding tightly to your religion addiction.”

Walter walked out of the cafeteria without replying. The conversation had unnerved him, making him feel slightly confused, seriously frustrated, and even somewhat ill in his stomach. As he made his way back to his work station he mumbling to himself, “I’m already giving everything up for God. I’m denying myself completely already.” Before starting work again, he took a moment to embrace his religion addiction and slowly he began to feel well once more.

The Apostle Paul’s Letter To The Ephesians: A Grace Paraphrase

Last year I wrote a paraphrase of Paul’s 4 prison letters (Ephesians, Philippians, Colossians & Philemon) called: The Gospel Cannot Be Chained. It is a paraphrase I wrote with the hope it would reveal the central message of God’s love and grace in a unique and liberating way. In the post below I’ve added the whole letter to the Ephesians. I hope you enjoy it, it was a lot of fun to paraphrase Paul, as he sure did preach a good gospel!

Blue skies,

Mick

A World Where Nothing Is Impossible: A Short Story

Joey stood upon a cliff in an enchanted land. He had just stepped through a magical mirror in his grandfather’s dusty attic. Startled and afraid, he was about to turn back and return to his world when he was called by another young boy. He who called himself Rattle, and he encouraged Joey to stay. It was there, on the cliff, that Rattle explained the difference between Joey’s world and his: In Rattle’s world, there were adventures everyone could experience, there were giants everyone could overcome, and no matter what you wanted to do, you could do it; in Rattle’s world, nothing was impossible.

Rattle asked Joey, “If you could do anything, what would you do?”

“I would fly away, like a bird.” Joey answered. “I would just sail off into the sunset, and leave all my sorrows behind me.”

“Then let’s do it,” Rattle said.

“What?” Joey replied. “It’s only what I would like to do, but of course I can’t. It’s impossible.”

“And what if it isn’t impossible? What if it’s completely possible?” Rattle stared over the cliff before turning back to Joey. Wearing a childish grin, he asked, “What if you just jumped off this cliff—just like this.” And with that, he dove off the cliff. Joey screamed. He fell to his knees, trembling with shock, but his shock of terror soon turned to a shock of unbelief. He looked in awe. There was Rattle, and he was flying! He circled in the air, drifting far out over the raging sea below and back again, landing back upon the cliff.

“Now, that was fun—all right, now let’s leave those sorrows behind you and take off.”

Joey stared in disbelief. “But I can’t fly,” he murmured.

“And what about me? Can I fly?” Rattle asked.

“No. Well, yes. But you shouldn’t be able to. It’s impossible.”

“But I can,” he said. Drawing close to Joey, he whispered, “And so can you.” He began circling Joey, flapping his arms like a bird. “Now, I’m about to leave all my sorrows behind me and fly off into the sun set like a bird. What about you?”

“I can’t! Don’t you understand? I can’t fly!” Joey said in protest.

Rattle continued to circle Joey. “Nonsense! Joey, you mustn’t let your fear tell you what you can and can’t do. You want to fly. You want to leave your sorrows behind. Well, let me tell you something my friend. Here, in this world, you can do just that!”

“But how?”

“You just have to take a leap of faith, that’s all,” Rattle said, as he strolled over to the cliff ledge. “There is nothing to fear in this world Joey, but you can fear if you choose.” He looked over the edge. “Boy, it certainly is a long way down.”

Joey remained a safe distance from the edge, watching in horror and fascination as Rattle walked along the crust of the cliff’s face, as if he were upon a tightrope.

“Last chance Joey. You can wait here, or you can go back to your world if you want. But, in your world, you can’t fly. In your world, you have to be a slave to fear. I know, I once lived there. And I will tell you this, I’m not going back. No, I’d rather take the leap of faith any day.” And with that, he jumped once more. Seconds later he was once again up in the air, howling his success. His joyful cry echoed from cliff to cliff. Joey took a few small steps closer to the edge. Looking over the edge, his eyes bounced down and up, from the ravaging waves below and the heights of freedom Rattle was experiencing above.

Can I fly? Should I take the leap of faith?

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He stared. No! No I can’t! he thought to himself as he stared over the edge again. No! It’s impossible, I can’t!… then, despite his own fears, he jumped, and he fell, he fell… he soared! He was airborne. I’m flying!

“I can fly!” he called out to Rattle.

“Yes you can Joey, you can fly indeed. Now, where are we going?”

“Where can we go?”

“Anywhere you want.”

“I want to go to where the giants live. The ones you talked about back on the cliff. The Giants that even children like me can defeat in battle.”

Rattle laughed. “Then, to the giants we shall go.”

Giving Up, Breaking Down, And Finding Hope Again: A Short Story

This is part two of a previous short story: The Bible Group Study Where A Heart Broke In Two

Jane walked in the front door, soaked to the skin. Richard shot up off the couch, “Jane! Dear God, where have you been? I’ve been worried sick!” He expected a fight. He expected her to be as fiery as she was when she left, and he had prepared himself for a battle. However, looking into her eyes he realised he was mistaken. She was no longer mad. She was no longer on fire with anger. He felt something in his soul shift, and with it a surge of shame gripped him.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” she said as she burst into tears. “I’m just so tired.”

“You’ve been walking around in the rain for 2 hours, of course you’re tired,” he replied.

“No,” she said, taking off her soaked jacket and letting it fall to the floor. “I’m tired of this half-life, Richard. I’m tired of never really living at all. I’m tired of religion, and if this religion is God, then I’m tired of God as well.”

Richard stood there, silent. He had been sitting in silence for over two hours. The rest of the Bible study group had long since left, and he had sat in the same position on the sofa, thinking. He had thought of his wife’s wild scene, how she embarrassed him and the whole Bible group. He had thought through what to say to her upon her return, how to say, and what Bible Scriptures to quote while saying it. He thought of his wife’s rebellion. He thought of how he could correct her. He thought of it all. But now, staring at her, half frozen, the only thing he could think of was his own shame. It overcame him, and fell to his knees.

“Oh, dear God, what have I done?” he said, with a deep cry of sadness. “What have I become? What have I done to you?”

Jane looked down at her husband. She loved him, she loved him so much, but this yoke of religion, his life’s ambition of building a big church, was killing him. She loved him, and she was too weak to lie to him.

“You became a super hero for God,” she said. “Only, I don’t think God ever intended anyone to be super hero for him.” She walked over and placed a hand on his shoulder, “It’s not only your fault, I know, I tried too. God knows I tried to be a super hero’s wife, a good wife. But it doesn’t work, Dick. This life, with a big church vision and all the programs and expectations and responsibilities. This life of one program you have to go to, or I have to go to, or the programs you spend so much energy getting others to go to. All this time wasted in endless programs while our family falls apart. All these visions and mission, while we no longer even know how to communicate with God, not even having any time for God, because we’re too busy working for him.”

Richard cried, he realized it was all true. He was so burdened. So tired of being the SuperPastor. So tired of hardening his heart to avoid seeing how he was losing the love of his wife and kids. So tired of losing the feeling of his own soul.

“What can I do? Dear God, I don’t know what to do!” he cried.

“I don’t know, either,” his wife answered him. “But with God’s grace,” she paused briefly, “perhaps we can find the way together?”

Richard looked up to his wife, red eyed and broken. “You don’t want to leave me? After all I’ve done? After all the neglect I’m guilty of?”

She too was now crying again, but with her tears came a great surge of hope in her heart. “I don’t want to run away from you.” she said, pulling his head up so he could look into her eyes. “I want to find you again. I want find the man I fell in love with. I want to start my relationship with God, and with that soft hearted man I fell in love with 16 years ago, from the beginning once more. Will you let me find you again?” she asked, “Will you let me find the man I fell in love with once more?”

Richard broke down in tears again. “I don’t deserve this. I don’t deserve your love.”

She smiled at him, standing in silence and letting her own tears roll down her face.

“Neither do I, neither does anyone, but that’s the beauty of God’s grace, isn’t it. It’s undeserved, but given freely.”

Richard jumped to his feet and embraced his wife. They cried and held each other. They cried and allowed God to fill their weak spirits with new hope. They cried the hardness out of themselves.

Finally, Richard took a step back, realizing his wife was still dressed in her soaked clothing. He laughed, “You’re still soaked. Wait here.” He ran to the bathroom and brought back two towels.

“Quickly now, take off those clothes!”

She looked up at him, sniffling… thinking… and finally saying, “All of them?” Before he could answer her, she reached out and grabbed his privates, “My, my,” she said, enjoying the shocked look on her husband’s face, “you haven’t spoken with that kind of passion for a long time.”

“Jane!” Richard yelped, “What are you doing?”

She began to maneuver him slowly across the living room. “Living, damn it. I’m choosing to live. I’m choosing to love my husband,” she pushed him backwards onto the sofa. He watched as she removed all her wet clothes. Standing naked before him, she said, “and now I’m taking control, got it? So, wipe that shocked look off your face, get undressed, and make love to me.”

Richard stared up at his wife and smiled a juvenile smile. For the first time, in a long time, he felt his heart scream and shout for joy.

Short story by Mick Mooney. Visit Mick’s: Facebook Page | View Mick’s novel: God’s Grammar