Sherry D. Ficklin's Blog, page 10

Author Advice Snark

As a published author/acquisitions editor I get some seriously sketchy questions from people about what I do. Now part of me, the benevolent, humble part, loves helping people. But that part evaporates into a puddle of irritation and snarkiness after being asked the same questions a million times. So here, for your information, is my totally honest FAQ guide and some supernatural gifs because screw you I do what I want.

 

Q. How do I get published?

A. Well, have you written, revised, and polished your book? If not, why are you even talking to me? This is an extreme case of putting the cart before the horse. If so, have you written a dynamic, interesting query letter? That’s the next step. DO NOT QUERY AN UNFINISHED, UNPOLISHED MANUSCRIPT. Period.

Q. How do I write a query letter?

A. What am I your personal magic 8 ball? Being an adult is 99% googling shit to figure out how to do said shit. Google it, I promise you will get hundreds of pages of advice and even examples. I’ll be over here eating a damn sammich.

Q. I have this great idea for a book, how about I tell it to you, then you can write it and we can split the money?

A. Are you fucking serious? Thanks but no thanks. I have a billion ideas of my own and to be frank, I don’t have time for your insanity.

Q. Do I need an agent?

A. No. But you want one if you can get one. Let’s face it, agents can get you in places you can’t get yourself. They are your team, your cheerleaders. Great to have if you can get one, but also not the be all and end all. My advice, try for an agent. Then, try without one. #YOLO

Q. How do I find an agent?

A. Querytracker.net. You’re freaking welcome.

Q. Should I traditionally publish or self publish?

A. *prepares Power Point presentation*

*shuffles index cards*

*steps up to podium*

I’m glad you freaking asked. The answer is yes to both. If you were lucky enough to land that agent, then you are well on your way to traditionally publishing. If not, don’t fear. There are many traditional publishers who accept unagented submissions. Try them. Still no luck? Well lucky you, we live in an era where you can type up your erotic leprechaun war drama mystery and with no money, experience, or wisdom, publish that bitch on Amazon all by yourself. Of course, if you do, be aware that no one will ever take you seriously as an author EVER. Self publishing WELL is very difficult. All the editing, formatting, cover design, and marketing that a publisher will do is now on your tiny little shoulders. And fair or not, you, as a self published author, will be judged and criticized harder than a writer with a traditional publisher. That’s just the cold hard truth.

Q. How do you find time to write? I can’t finish anything.

A. Writers write. We sneak hours when we should be eating, sleeping, or caring for our homes and fill it with a caffeinated haze of pounding on the keyboard. It drives us crazy. If it doesn’t drive you enough for you to make it a priority, then you aren’t a writer. Get off the damn bus.

Q. How much do I really need to build an author brand before I publish?

A. Not at all. When I am looking at a potential author the first thing I do is google them (see: adulting) and if the first thing that crops up is your spring break photos or that skeevy sex tape from college, well, let’s just remember that first impressions are everything. You don’t need a full on author brand right out of the gate, but for shits sake, have a website that looks halfway professional and a decent social media on whatever your chosen platform is. Don’t have six million accounts that you never use or a blog that you never update. Those hurt more than they help. Basically, be a living human in the digital age who wants to be taken seriously as an author.

 

Q. Can you help me edit my manuscript?

A. No. Literally, I don’t have time. For a handful of close friends I might make an exception during my brief downtime, but unless we’ve slept in the same room at some point, don’t even ask. And asking strangers just makes you look like a noob anyway. There are crit groups for that shit. Join one.

Q. I’m scared no one will like it. How do you get over your fear of showing people your work?

A. It’s called being a grown up. For shits sake, do you cry when you have to show your boss a spreadsheet at work? Authors need to have two things, talent and a thick skin. If you don’t have both, you are piranha bait.

So that’s my list. Do you get these kinds of questions or do you have questions for me to answer? I’d be happy to add them to the list.

Book Expo America Survival Guide pt. 4

#Hacking your hotel at BEA

You may have noticed that the cover dropped (a little early thanks to a glitch over at Amazon) for my new book, Playing With Fire: a #HACKER novel. If you’re curious, you can check out all the details here.

In the spirit of that hack, I decided today’s post would be all about how clever hotel hacks you can use at #BEA15.

Let’s face it, if you are forking out $300 a night for a hotel, you deserve to get your money’s worth, amirite?? No problem! I’m here with some super handy tips from not just my own experience, but those of some of my fellow traveling authors. Prepare to be #HACKED!

1) Stressed from the flight and need a little pampering? Your hotel room can be a DIY spa. Use a few drops of lotion mixed with sugar packets from the coffee area and rub gently onto your face. Take two tea bags, dampen with warm water (or just use the used bags after you have some tea), heat a washcloth with hot water and the wring it out. Lay down, rest the tea bags across each eye, and cover your face with the washcloth until it begins to get cold. Remove it all and wash your face to get the sugar scrub off. Now your skin is soft and glowing and your eyes aren’t puffy. In the morning, you can use your used coffee grounds to make a similar scrub by adding the grounds and a few drops of lotion. Sugar and coffee grounds make excellent exfoliators. Ok, so it’s not exactly a spa getaway, but you will feel a little less gross at least.

2) If you are staying at a hotel that offers free breakfast, grab a few extra fruits and yogurts and keep them in your mini fridge. They make great late night snacks, or you can take them to the convention with you for a pick me up.Don’t have a fridge? Fill your bathroom sink with ice and cover with a folded towel. The ice will last about half a day. Mini cereal boxes also make crunchy snacks. If you mix several of those tiny boxes together, it’s poor traveler’s trail mix.

3) Remember the last post when I told you to toss a dryer sheet in your suitcase to keep your clothes from smelling like jet fuel? Well when you get to the hotel, tuck it in your A/C unit to keep your room smelling fresh too! Unless of course you like the musky odor of cleaning products and stale BO. Whatever. I try not to judge.

 

4) Forgot your shaving cream? Conditioner works just as well. Lotion makes a decent shoe polish, and shampoo can be used to treat a stain in a pinch. Got smelly dirty laundry to put back in your suitcase? Toss in an opened soap bar to help with the smell. Desperation breeds creativity.

5) If your hotel doesn’t offer breakfast and you are on a budget, bring a few packets of instant oatmeal or cup o’ soups.  You can boil water in your hotel coffee pot and cook these items right in your room, in a coffee mug, no microwave needed. Cover leftovers with a shower cap and toss in the fridge.Just do me a favor and don’t cook food IN your coffee pot no matter what weird website tells you you can. Maybe it’s just me, but I don’t want my mouth on anything in that room that isn’t hermetically sealed.

6) Forgot your phone charger? Most TV’s have USB ports on the back you can use in lieu of a wall cube. If you don’t have a cord at all, ask your desk clerk if there are any in lost and found that you might be able to borrow. Generally, hotels have TONS of these because people are always leaving them! Not that you are forgetful like me, but I once forgot the whole phone so…yeah.

7) Pillow too fluffy? Pull open the pillow case. Often, they will fold the ends of pillow cases to make pillows firmer and fuller. Pillow too thin or soft? Put a folded towel inside the pillow case under the pillow. It can thicken and help firm it up. I’m a pillow snob. Nothing is worse than the too soft or too fluffy pillows. Also, I sometimes just pack my own pillowcase because, I’m a little crazy like that.

8) Day sleeping? Use a pants hangar from the closet (the one with the clips on it) and clip the curtains together. But honestly, if you are napping while the sun is up at BEA, shame on you and we can’t be friends anymore.

9) Shoes dirty? Cover them with shower caps before you toss them back in your suitcase! You don’t want NYC street grime on your clothes, no matter how dirty they already are, especially if you just stepped in something sketchy outside a bar in Astoria at 3 am and then had to take the train back to the hotel. That’s where mutant powers come from, folks.

10) Afraid you’ll lose your room key? Drop one in an envelope with your name on it and leave it at the desk for yourself should an issue arise. I’m not saying you’re going to get to drunk too find your room key in your purse, but I’ve seen what BEA after hours parties can do to a person, and it’s not pretty. But sometimes, it’s pretty damn funny.

Those are my top ten. I hope you find them super helpful! Happy traveling and I can’t wait to see you all at BEA! Oh, and remember, the first 100 people to come see me at booth PDZ 565 get some very cool #HACKER swag!

 

Book Expo America Survival Guide pt. 3

Welcome back! I see you just can’t get enough of me and my super handy tips for preparing for #BEA15! Good! Clearly I can’t get enough either! Today, I’m gonna talk about that time honored tradition: Packing for a convention. Now, I’m not going to tell you what to pack, I think you are all smart enough to know to pack your toothbrush and undies, but I will be walking you through a few specific pieces that go a long way in a travel wardrobe and are still BEA chic.

Now, it so happens that I have Denver Comic Con right before BEA, they are literally back to back for me, and best believe the packing for each one will be very different. The dress code at DCC is pretty much ripped jeans and super hero t-shirts. BEA is what I like to call “professional comfort” meaning nice, but not stiff. Now, dudes, let’s face it, this is going to be of very little help to you. Sorry, but I have zero experience dressing as a professional male, so you are on your own. But judging by the way my husband packs, you can literally grab 8 random hangers out of your closet, fold them over and toss them in your suitcase with some hair gel and deodorant and call it good.

So screw you, buddy. I hate you and your easy style and your effortless grooming.

But for us ladies, deciding what to pack/wear can be a challenge. You need to find a balance of conserving space (you need room for all that stuff you are going to be bringing home!), looking good, and keeping it as low maintenance as possible. So here are 5 things I suggest you bring as part (if not ALL) of your BEA wardrobe:

1) The three most comfortable pairs of pants, nice jeans (no tears or stains), or maxi skirts you own and a gallon freezer bag. Why Maxi skirts? Because it’s cold as frozen hell in the Javits and nothing is quite as unsightly as goosebumpy legs. Why only 3 pairs if you’re going to be there for longer than 3 days? Contrary to popular belief, pants, jeans especially, don’t have to be washed after every wear. Simply fold them up, put them in a gallon ziplock bag, and stick them in the freezer for a few hours. It kills all the bacteria and odors. Unless you’ve managed to spill something on them, you will be just fine. As a matter of fact, this method of ‘cleaning’ your jeans is recommended by the Levi’s corp for keeping your trousers looking like new.

2) One top for every day you are attending. My suggestions for tops include flowing blouses, solid color tank tops, and dressy t-shirts. I suggest solid colors and keeping patterns/designs in the print to a minimum. The lighting in the Javits can be unforgiving and that red shirt with the silver metal swirls might come out in photographs looking like you have boob sparkles. Trust me on this, I’ve seen it. I’ve lived it.

3) A printed scarf. Make sure the color palette goes with everything you pack and you’ll always have a cozy, stylish accessory.

4) A light jacket or sweater that matches EVERY single top. This is another reason I recommend solid color shirts. That way, one slick black jacket or cool grey sweater works with everything. You probably won’t need it outside the Javits, but it’s nice to have indoors and if you go out after dark. Plus it’s a piece that can take a simple outfit and dress it up or down, as the occasion dictates.

5) Comfortable shoes. I’ve tossed up a few outfit examples here, and they all have shoes that should be banned outside of Paris fashion week. Or at very least, know that if you can’t walk in them for 8-10 hours straight, they will be a bad idea. Some comfortable ballet flats, clean tennis shoes, or my personal favorite, a snappy pair of Chuck Taylors are a much better way to go. Whatever shoes you pick, pack ONE pair that go with everything. I always pack my Chuck T’s, then travel in flip flops. That way if something happens and I’m desperate for space on the way home, I can toss the flip flops and wear the tennnies, giving me a little more space and I’m only out like $5.

* A few more tips.

-Roll your clothes instead of folding to save space.

-Add a dryer sheet to your suitcase to keep your clothes from smelling like jet fuel after the flight.

-Pack jewelry inside rolled clothes to keep them from tangling or getting dumped in the suitcase during transport.

 

**I don’t suggest traveling in a skirt. I can tell you from experience it can lead to some awkward situations. Last year my maxi skirt got stuck in the escalator at Dallas airport and I had to be rescued my a kind elderly man who grabbed my hem and yanked right before I hit the landing step. I could have died. Of embarrassment that is. It was every horror movie I’ve ever seen flashing before my eyes, for realsies.

And with that, good luck and happy packing!

 

#HACKER

Playing with Fire, the highly anticipated new novel by Sherry Ficklin, was loaded onto the web, with the cover set to be revealed in June. But in some dark corner of the internet, someone had other plans. Today, a glitch deep in the Amazon mainframe posted the book, and its cover early. The mysterious hacker apparently couldn’t wait to pre-order the first of the #HACKER novels, and now, you don’t have to wait either.

 

One brilliant young hacker.

One experimental government aircraft.

One chance to keep it all from going up in flames.

Still recovering from her troubled past, Farris is no stranger to change. But when the military transfers her father across the country to an experimental aircraft squadron, settling in to a new life is the least of her problems. As a series of apparent computer glitches threaten the security of the fleet and the blame falls on her father, she decides to put her computer skills to use digging up the truth. Soon she’s drawn into the perilous world of a hacker who is determined to ground the fleet—at any cost.

When all signs lead to someone close to her as the mastermind, Farris will have to burn more than bridges to get to the truth. She will have to risk her fragile new life to uncover the identity of the cyber criminal before they can escalate from harmless tampering… to all out murder.

 

 

Book Expo America Survival Guide pt. 2

I’m back again. I was going to wait until next week to post this, but I ran into a few bookish friends on Twitter who are having BEA anxiety dreams, like one was lost and couldn’t find her way to the Harlequin booth and the other was walking the floor naked. That’s some next level stress right there. So I figured I’d best get on with it.

For you newbies you are probably thinking, what’s the big deal?

Well, let me tell you.

BEA is the largest publishing trade show in North America, the second largest in the world. Publishers, buyers, and media peeps fly in from across the globe to present and acquire the next year’s line up of books. Last year they had publishers from over 83 countries, not to mention the book sellers, buyers, rights agents, literary agents, retailers, editors, librarians, scouts, film and TV reps, and media/bloggers.

As an author, the very idea makes my skin begin to crawl with nervous energy.

For an attendee, there are over a thousand exhibitors, plus authors, celebrities, and industry pros to hob knob with. Last year alone, BEA recorded close to 15K attendees.

*fans self*

For three days the Javits becomes a gauntlet which must be carefully, but thoroughly, navigated. It’s over 760,000 square feet with three main stories, in addition to the tower which they use for receptions and parties and things. Inside, the isles begin at row 100 on the far right and count up to 4000 or so on the far left.

This is why people are having panic attacks.

And I think I just gave you one too. Sorry, here’s a paper bag. But stay with me because I’m about to throw some tension relievers your way!

Now that we are both hyperventilating, let’s tackle this a piece at a time. If you read my previous post, then you are already at the Javits, in comfy shoes, stocked with snacks and water, ready to go for it. Here are the things you should know going into BEA:

1) Get there early and sit in line or get there an hour after it starts. The entrance lines will be loooong.If there is an early signing or something you totally don’t want to miss, then get there at least 2 hours before doors open and get your butt in line. Otherwise, maybe take a long breakfast and let the crowd die down a bit. Totally up to you. But either way, be prepared for a bit of a wait. Don’t stress it. Find a comfy spot in line to sit and make friends with the people around you. I mean, you already know they are book lovers like you, so you have at least one great conversation starter. General attendees, media peeps and things will pick up badges in the northwest corner at the Express Registration counters. Bring your printed ticket receipt with you to ensure a smooth check in.

*If you are an exhibiting author and/or have an exhibitor badge, you check in at the Exhibitor Registration counter on the north east side. The lines are much shorter and they will get you in and out super fast. These badges also get you into the center about an hour before the rest of the crowd.

 

2) Once inside grab the day’s catalog. It will have a bunch of stuff happening that may or may not be on the website, plus the list of books being featured that day. And, heck, it’s a nice (free) keepsake.

3) If you were smart enough to empty your rolling suitcase and bring it with you, take it over to the parking area and pay the $3-$5 to park it for the day before you go inside. Remember, no rolling carts on the floor. You can trek back and forth to drop books in your bag throughout the day as you need to.

4) ALL THE FREE BOOKS. You’ve just stepped inside and you are now overwhelmed by all the free, awesome, shiny swag and books. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD use restraint. Don’t grab six copies of a book to have a bunch for giveaways (publishers hate that). Be respectful and leave some for everyone. Now, if you are dividing and conquering with a buddy (where you go grab one book while she runs off to grab another and then you each get two and trade) then by all means. But nobody likes a book snatcher. And keep in mind that while the books are free to you, the publishers still have to pay to print them, they are effectively losing about $4 for each copy they give away, so be respectful of that. Also, keep in mind that NOT EVERY BOOK YOU SEE is free. Some are for display only so be sure you ask before you snatch. Now if there’s a pile of the same book and people are just taking it, then of course go for it. But one copy on a shelf? Best ask.

And be careful of SWAG. SWAG is very tempting and you should absolutely grab your fill, but too much and you could end up with SWAG-lash, or the depression you get when you realize half of your 50lb bag allotment is used up with bookmarks and bags.

5) Wifi at the Javits blows. You’ll discover this when you try to post that selfie of you with your favorite author. The best reception is found downstairs by the food court. If you can, just *wait till you get back to the hotel to post.

*Unless you are an exhibiting author. If you are, try to post every hour or so with live updates from the con floor. Be sure to tag your uploads with #BEA15 and your booth number!

Speaking of the food court, holy shit it’s almost 4pm and you haven’t eaten all day (unless you took my advice and packed a power bar or two). Lucky for you, there’s food here. It’s overpriced and the lines are obscenely long. So what do you do? Well, if you are strapped for time, then you’re better off to wander out into the sunlight (ah! It burns! My eyes!) and hit the falafel cart across the street. It sounds gross. It even looks gross. But sweet mother of god it’s so tasty and, bonus, it’s cheap. Or at least as cheap as you’re going to get in NYC.

Got a little more time? Cross the street at the far west side of the Javits and walk into the city about two blocks and there’s a killer american restaurant on the corner called Clyde Fraziers. The food is spectacular and not terribly priced. You can be back at the Javits in under an hour.

6) You’ve crossed all your must do’s off the list for the day. Now what? Well, if you are a dirty quitter you can go back to the hotel and take a nap. OR you can wander the floor. Check out all the rest of what BEA has to offer. Start at isle 100 and make your way up and down, taking everything in. You may find some jems you never knew you wanted or run into authors and celebs doing the exact same thing. True story, my first year I was rushing to get to a signing and I full on barreled into Julie Kagawa. She was so sweet and tiny and I honestly think I nearly flattened her like a pancake. Take your time and just wander the crowd.

7) Your feet are legit killing you now. Didn’t I say something about shoes? You can’t remember because it hurts all the way into your ears. Then you see it, an small round table with two empty chairs. You say a silent prayer of thanks and take a seat, only to be chased out by the booth boss. Yeah, those super comfy looking seats aren’t for you. Most of the exhibitors have meetings scheduled every 15 minutes or so and that’s what those tables are for, and for some reason they get really pissy when you plop your butt in one, even just for a minute. No clue why, but this is just a FYI. On the very back wall, near the bathrooms, there are often a handful of big round tables where you can sit. But other than that, your best bet for a little relief is either down at the food court or just squatting with your back to a wall somewhere. Also, Disney, Harper Collins, and Harlequin often spring for the extra padded carpet, so wander over there to stand for a bit and get some relief.

8) Hey, what’s up there? There’s a big ass escalator that takes you up onto a whole other level. Look for signs. Often that level is reserved for authors and other featured attendees. Sometimes publishers even have beer and wine receptions up there. If you are going as an author, try to score an invite. I haven’t quite figured this one out myself yet, but for reals.

9) Panels? Autographs? The panels are held at the uptown stage mostly, to the far rear left of the Javits. To the right rear is the massive autographing area. Now, remember not all autographing will happen in this area, but it’s where most of the “big” names will be. These lines also get long fast, so check the schedule and try to show up early. There is often a limited number of books being handed out.

Don’t stress if you miss out! There are literally thousands of books given out at BEA, so if you miss one, just move on to the next. Or, if you leave a card with the publisher/booth rep, you can often score a digital arc after the fact with a simple email.

10) No matter if you are an author, a blogger, a retailer, or a librarian, hand out business cards. No one at BEA will ever say no thanks to a business card. They should have your name and at least email contact info on the front and you should give one to EVERYONE you meet.  The biggest function of BEA is making connections. It’s super frustrating to get home and say, wow I met the most amazing people, if only I could remember them all! And then when you do get home, send an email, even just a, hey, it was great meeting you.

So that’s my advice for navigating BEA. Remember the 5-2-1 rule, get at least 5 hours of sleep a night, eat at least 2 meals a day, and shower at least 1 time a day (con crud is a THING, folks). I can’t wait to see you all there! Be sure to swing by the Clean Teen Publishing booth (PDZ) 565, row 500 in the right rear near the autographing area, and say hello! It’s going to be a great con!

 

XOXP

Clean Teen Publishing will be hosting signings for my new novels PRODIGAL & RIVEN and the forthcoming QUEEN OF TOMORROW! We will also be doing the cover reveal from my new novel PLAYING WITH FIRE!

Book Expo America Survival Guide pt. 1

Hello bookish folks! It’s nearly that magical time again where everyone who is anyone (and can fork out roughly the cost of a new kidney) descends upon NYC in a mad scramble for the new and upcoming books of the year. Yes, I’m talking about Book Expo America.

A BEA vet, I can say that this is the single largest convention I attend each year and by far the most chaotic. So, for newbies and veterans alike, I’m here to offer you a handy BEA Survival Guide. This is the first part of a series of blogs designed to help you navigate the treacherous waters of Book Expo. This week, I’m breaking down some pre-convention things you can be doing to prepare.

1) Break in those shoes. Seriously. BEA is basically the hardest cardio ever, with books at the end, yay! You will walk approximately 5-10 miles each day (depending on how many laps you do around the Javits) not to mention the to and from wherever you are staying, and any after convention stuff you might do. Even the most comfortable pair of shoes you own will leave your feet sore and achy by day two. So if you are going to do something stupid like buy cute new shoes for the event (see also: Pulling a SHERRY), get them now. And then spend the next two weeks doing a light jog on the treadmill in them for at least 60 minutes a day. This is not a joke. If you are going to have issues, better to know now, plus it never hurts to build up those callouses.

2) Pre-pack. Packing efficiently is a skill born of 5 am crazed desperation to fit all the new books and swag you just collected into one suitcase before you miss your flight home (see also: Pulling a SHERRY part 2). I suggest you think ahead. I’ve heard everything from packing extra suitcases inside your main suitcase so you come to NYC with one bag and leave with three, to packing and shipping your clothes home (because clothes are lighter than books and thus easier and cheaper to ship). However you do it, expect at least one full suitcase of books and swag. Even if you have the self control of a nun in a nudist colony, you are coming home with stuff. I promise you. Figure it out early so there are no surprises.

3) Make your plan. BEA is a virtual explosion of awesomeness and you don’t want to miss a single moment of it. But, spoiler alert, you will. There is literally no way to see and do everything, and that’s OK. You should, however, jump on to the BEA website and either download their handy Show Planner App, or comb through the scheduled events and make a spreadsheet of what you want to see and do. Be aware that the schedule is fluid and each day there will be a printed list of the day’s events free to grab, with all the up to date info. Also, not every event or signing will be listed online or in the flyer. BEA actually charges a small fortune for those listings so many smaller publishers rely on word of mouth to alert readers to their booth events.

For example, *cough, shameless plug, cough* Clean Teen Publishing has lots of signings happening that you won’t see in the online list. Here’s our schedule:

So be sure to allow yourself some time to wander and browse each aisle too. (and come see me, YAY!)

This is also the time to book hotel rooms and flights before they are all gone. Honestly, I suggest looking for roomies to split room costs if you can (and know that the $300+ per night rooms will still be the size of my closet and probably smell like a Ladies Foot Locker) and generally buddying up to save on cabs and things. Plus, it’s just more fun when you have someone to experience it with.

4) Take inventory. You will need things like wireless cell phone chargers (there is nowhere in the Javits to charge your phone), PowerBars and water bottles (you can buy them there if you are made of money or just plain don’t care how much you are spending, but either way, you will need to keep fueled up and hydrated), and bandaids (bandaids are currency at BEA, like cigarettes in prison). Think very hard about what you need, but take the absolute minimum you need to survive. A bag full of random stuff leaves less room for books and goodies, not to mention it will save your aching shoulders/back. If you can help it, don’t take a bag into the Javits at all. You can grab one when you get there, every other booth will be handing them out like peppermints.

5) Say hello to my little friends. No, really. Spend the next week or so combing through the website and checking out other bloggers and authors posts about BEA. You will stumble across some great tips and advice that will give you a better idea what to expect. Even if you’ve been to conventions before, anyone will tell you that there’s nothing quite like BEA and it always feels better to go in prepared.

 

That’s it for now. Next Wednesday I will be back to talk about the ins and outs of the Javits and what to expect inside the con. Hope everyone has a fantastic week and I can’t wait to see you all there!

Surviving the Slush Pile

As you may know, in addition to being an author I’m also an acquisitions editor (see: slush slave) for Clean Teen Publishing and Crimson Tree Publishing. It’s a fancy title that basically means when you submit to them, I’m one of the first people to see the submission, and it has to get past me and my team before being considered by the big bosses.

Having been on the other side of that door more times than I’d like to count, I thought I’d give you a run down of the things I’m looking for, and the things that absolutely turn me off to a submission. And I’m not going to lie, I’m PICKY. I can afford to be. Clean Teen is one of the fastest growing midlist publishers in YA right now and we have something most other small presses can’t offer, a no kidding distributor that gets books on shelf in stores like Barnes & Noble and other big chains. We get several hundred of submissions a year so we only take the top 1% of those who email us.

Those odds sound terrible, don’t they?

That’s part of why I’m doing this post. Sometimes the hardest part of submitting is just getting your foot in the door, and this will at least help you with that much! So buckle in and take notes because I’m not going to pull any punches.

 

Things that I’m looking for in a submission:

1) This sounds nit picky but, personalize your submission. If you are blasting a general submission to a hundred people and I’m just another on the BCC chain, it starts you off on the wrong foot. I know time is precious, but show me that you’ve at least looked at our website, have read our guidelines and have some idea what we are looking for. I’m not talking about flattery, but you should always do your homework on a company before submitting to them. Not doing so is an indicator of laziness and laziness will not do in this business.

2) Write a concise, short blurb. If your blurb is more than a paragraph, it’s too long. I know, boiling 60K words into 3-5 sentences is hard. You know what else is hard? Writing and selling a book. Suck it up buttercup. I don’t need every random plot string. Give me the extreme basics, your book in a nutshell. Use “hook” words. Don’t tell me your MC is a wayard, shy, solemn teenage boy who recently lost his parents in a dramatic car crash, tell me he’s an orphan.You should, as an author, be able to effectively tell someone about your book in one sentence. Can you do that? If not, learn to. Here are a few random examples:

“An young orphan discovers his magical heritage and is whisked off to a school where he will be trained to fight against the dark wizard responsible for his parent’s death.”

Can you guess the book? I bet you can. And while this example lacks the intricacy of the whole story, it is effective in giving the base plot and intriguing the reader into wanting to see more. That’s the goal.

“An agoraphobic father has to trek across the world in search of the man who kidnapped his handicapped son.”

Can you guess that one? How about Finding Nemo? Here’s another.

“A teenage girl wakes to find a recently deceased classmate in her room, and he’s desperate for her help in solving his murder.”

That’s from my book Losing Logan.

Now these are ultra short examples. But if it takes you three sprawling paragraphs to get to the meat of your plot, I’m already bored and looking for a reason to move on.

3) Tell me what books your book is similar too, and how it is also unique. Tell me it’s like Veronica Mars meets True Blood. I want to know what your target audience is. I need to know where it will sit on the shelf of a bookstore. Comparison is great. I don’t need you to come up with something no one has ever heard of before. I don’t need you to reinvent the wheel with your genre. But you need to have a clear audience, and a unique enough presentation or voice to make it stand out against similar books. This shows me that you understand your audience and can deliver something they will want to read.

4) Tell me about you. I don’t mean where you went to school or how many cats you have. Tell me what your social media presence is like, do you have a website, twitter, facebook page (FYI the answer to these should always be YES and you should include links)? Do you have other books or published writings? Sometimes the difference between an acceptance and a rejection is whether I can look at your online presence and see if you are engaging, relateable, and professional. If you haven’t updated your page or blogged or sent out a tweet since November of last year, that’s a big red flag to me. It’s not so much about having tons of followers or friends as it is about being actively engaged in your writing career and that means having a strong online presence. Unfortunately the days when an author could hibernate 9 months out of the year and only surface to release a book for a week then disappear again are long over.

5) The first 15 pages must absolutely wow me. This is make it or break it. If you give me 15 pages and ten are a long, boring prologue, I will probably not read past it. If you start with a dream or in a quiet moment of reflection, I will probably stop reading. The purpose of the first 15 pages is to grab the reader by the collar and say, dude you have got to see this. Think about it this way, when someone asks you about the most interesting day of your life, do you begin with, well I woke up and ate breakfast and brushed my teeth…NO! You skip straight into the interesting stuff. You can always fill in backstory later. Also, keep in mind that the first pages of dialogue can set the tone of your main character. So if your MC is a sassy smart mouth, the first words they speak should reflect that. SHOW me who your characters are right away. The best way to do that is with strong dialogue. This is a personal pet peeve of mine. Nothing will make me reject a book faster than 15 pages of meh dialogue.

Things that will get you automatically rejected:

1) Being a diva. I mean, having questions is great and knowing what you are looking for in a publisher is wonderful, but if the first paragraph of your submission is that you aren’t interested in signing with us unless we can guarantee you at least a quarter million in sales a year and translations in all six major markets, I will dump you right there. You are obviously not the kind of person I’m looking to work with, and honestly, I can already see that your expectations are way too unrealistic which actually labels you extremely unprofessional. A publishing house is a team and everyone has to work together to achieve success. Having one dick bag in the mix can ruin the whole process for everyone.

2) Ignoring my submission guidelines. If we aren’t taking horror and you straight up tell me, I know you aren’t taking horror but I know you will change your mind when you read this I will instantly reject you. If there is a grey area, like I know you aren’t taking horror but it’s kind of a mystery with horror elements, then go for it. If we ask for 15 pages and you send ten, I’m already mad at you. If you send it as a pdf and we’ve specifically asked for a word doc, I’m already mad at you. It might not mean an instant rejection, but you aren’t doing yourself any favors either.

3) Mistakes. For the love of all that is holy pre-edit your work. Have a couple of beta readers look over it. If the first pages are full of errors, even minor errors, I will reject it. Some people say, isn’t that what editors are for? Well, yeah, but we have a handful of editors who are already swamped with work, so why would I overtax them by handing them a manuscript that I know will take weeks if not longer to clean up? Answer, I won’t.

4) Being a dick. This goes back to the social media thing. If I look on your pages (and I WILL stalk you before making an offer) and see that you post lots of political, religious, or other bias content, I will probably reject you. This sounds harsh and obviously everyone is welcome to their own opinions but, if you are trying to become a professional author, you can’t be alienating readers whose beliefs might be different than your own by posting aggressive content. This is also a good indicator that you won’t be able to control yourself when bad reviews roll in (and they will, it happens to every author without exception) and we can not risk having authors who come unglued to readers or bloggers.

 

5) Being too tech unsavvy will get you a rejection from me. The days of snail mail and paper submissions is dead. If you can’t figure out how to print, sign, and scan your contract back to me, if you can’t turn a word doc into a pdf, if you are determined to write your novel on grandma’s old typewriter, this is where we part ways. Publishing is a different animal than it was even ten years ago and you don’t have to work for Apple, but you do have to be comfortable with basics of internet use and word processing. It’s a digital market and being able to navigate a digital landscape is no longer optional if you want to have success in the industry. I wish I didn’t have to say this, but clearly I do since I’ve been seeing a lot of this lately. The internet is your friend. If I ask you if you have ever tried Pinterest and you give me blank puppy dog eyes I will drop you like a hot potato. Period.

So that’s my list. Now, keep in mind that doing everything right still won’t always get you an enthusiastic YES! There are a million factors in taking or rejecting a book and 99% of them have to do with the book and the current market as a whole. But this will at least help you get that “please send us the full manuscript for consideration”. And that makes the odds of signing a book contract jump exponentially. You can’t get your book signed if you can’t get it in the door.

Good luck and happy submitting!

 

**ONE MORE THING**

If you’re curious what types of books I’m currently in the market for, here’s a quick list:

-A YA Pirate story (OMG if you have this send it to me right meow!)

-Werewolves and Shifters YA or NA

-A YA Witch book (think along the lines of Kelly Armstrong’s Otherworld novels)

-YA Mysteries

-Time Travel

Prodigal and Riven are here!!

NEW RELEASE IN THE LOST IMPERIALS SERIES
By Tyler H. Jolley and Sherry D. Ficklin



It’s May 5th and that means we have two new exciting releases in The Lost Imperials Series by Tyler H. Jolley and Sherry D. Ficklin. Prodigal and Riven are now available. This is a unique sequel to the series as both Prodigal and Riven are written from alternative view points during the same time frame in the storyline. These novels are available together in an exciting flip book print release or as two separate ebooks. These are not novellas, they are two full-length novels. In true Clean Teen Publishing fashion, these two novels have been discounted to $2.99 for the release day only. So get your copy at the discounted rate while you can. In addition, check out this exciting sale on the first book in the series: Extracted.

EXTRACTED IS ON SALE FOR $0.99 THROUGH 5/7/15:

KINDLE / NOOK / iTUNES

ABOUT THE LOST IMPERIALS SERIES:
In a battle for control of the time stream, the past and the future will collide, either saving mankind—or destroying it.

The Tesla Institute stands on one side of the battle. Controlled by the mind of one of the greatest inventors in history, the Institute recruits gifted, young time travelers called Rifters. Those who survive his training are sent into history with the mission to preserve the time stream, recruit more of their kind, and better humanity through subtle, controlled event manipulation.

Standing in the way are the Hollows, a rogue group of Rifters who have vowed to put an end to the Tesla Institute—at all costs. They steal, cheat, and bend history to their own ends. Using children stolen from time as their personal armies, they fight not only for control of time itself, but also for self-preservation.

ORDER PRODIGAL AND RIVEN AT THE PRE-ORDER PRICE



PRODIGAL
RIVEN

ORDER THE PRINT BOOK

JOIN THE PARTY AND WIN PRIZES!

Join the CTP Steampunk Spectacular release day party virtually on Facebook. Stop by between 7pm-9pm Eastern Time for a chance to connect with the authors, play games, and win some awesome prizes. You do not want to miss this free party!

ABOUT THE AUTHORS:
TYLER H. JOLLEY AND SHERRY D. FICKLIN



In order to support his hobby of writing, Tyler decided to pursue dentistry. He graduated from Nova Southeastern University School of Dental Medicine in 2002. He then completed a four year residency at the University of Pennsylvania. In June 2006, he opened Jolley Smiles in Grand Junction, CO. Snowboarding, mountain biking, road biking, fly fishing, bird hunting, camping, hiking, and backpacking are the things he enjoys doing with his family. When life gets stressful he escapes to unseen worlds.

Sherry is a full time writer from Colorado where she lives with her husband, four kids, two dogs, and a fluctuating number of chickens and house guests. A former military brat, she loves to travel, eat exotic food, and meet new people. She can often be found browsing her local bookstore with a large white hot chocolate in one hand and a towering stack of books in the other. That is, unless she’s on deadline at which time she, like the Loch Ness monster, is often only seen in blurry photographs.

Chasing Midnight release day!

TWO EXCITING SEQUELS RELEASE TODAY!

Today is a great day for reading and we have the perfect books for you. We have a Clean Teen Publishing and a Crimson Tree Publishing book releasing today. Both are exciting New Adult Paranormal Romance books. Check them out below and make sure to go grab your copy before the price goes up. Happy Reading!

Also, don’t forget to join the release day party online! We have tons of great games, prizes, author interaction and more. Plus, it’s virtual, so you can attend in your pajamas! If you haven’t partied with us in the past, you are missing out on a night of fun. Check out our party Tuesday night on our Facebook Event Page.

AVENGING by Holly Kelly

(Book #3 in the Rising Series. Read book #1— RISING— for FREE!)

AMAZON / NOOK

Two thousand years ago, King Triton witnessed the slaughter and total annihilation of his merchildren. He vowed then and there to never again father a child. Powerful and eternally youthful, Triton was no stranger to seduction. But his resolve was unwavering—until he met Nicole. Unable to resist the human woman, he found himself swept up in her arms. When he finally came to his senses, he abandoned her to return to his refuge in the sea.

Twenty years later, he comes face to face with his daughter. Triton is both thrilled and frightened to learn he’s a father. Meeting the child he never knew fills a void in his life. But at the same time, he once again finds his heart at risk. Even more terrifying, he’s forced to admit he’s still in love with Nicole. Gathering his courage, he leaves the sea to seek her out. But the pain he caused is not easily forgotten. And mending broken hearts should be the least of his worries. The elements are in commotion, threatening the utter destruction of mankind. And much to the sea god’s surprise, the human woman he loves may be the key to saving them all.

CHASING MIDNIGHT by Ranae Glass

(Book #2 in the Dark of Night Series. Read book #1— CHASING DAYBREAK— for FREE!)

AMAZON / NOOK

Isabel Stone’s life is far from normal. She’s a girl with problems—vampire problems to be specific and, now, she also has one ticked-off specter on her hands.

Approached by a childhood friend and medium, Isabel agrees to look into the murder of a local girl, only to wind up inhabited by the solitary witness—a centuries-old ghost who is all too happy to piggyback along in Isabel’s body, and she’s not leaving until the culprit is behind bars.

With the help of her partner, Shane, and her crazy family, Isabel struggles to get to the truth, unmask a killer, and deal with her growing feelings for not one, but two, of the sexy, undead men vying for her heart. Just when things are finally falling into place, a huge revelation takes her out of the frying pan… and straight into the fire.

BEA 2015!

CLEAN TEEN PUBLISHING WILL BE AT BEA 2015!
KEEP READING FOR A GIVEAWAY AT THE END…

We are excited to announce that Clean Teen Publishing and Crimson Tree Publishing will officially be exhibitors at Book Expo America in New York City. BEA is the largest publishing event in North America. This event that will take place at the Javits Center in New York, will have 800+ authors (including some of our very own) and more than 1,000 exhibitors.

Our authors in attendance at BEA include: Julie Wetzel, Nely Cab, Tyler H. Jolley, Sherry D. Ficklin, Jennifer Anne Davis, and Michelle K. Pickett. In addition, our Clean Teen Publishing owners: Rebecca Gober, Courtney Nuckels, and Marya Heiman will be in attendance.

Clean Teen Publishing is coming with lots of SWAG, Book Signings, and more! Check out our booth in the Publisher Discovery Zone, booth #PDZ565. Below is a timeline for our author book signings. We hope to see some of you there. If you are attending BEA this year and would like to meet up with us, join our Facebook Group or send us an email.

CHECK OUT OUR BOOTH LOCATION:

DON’T MISS OUT ON OUR SWAG:

We will be handing out some amazing handmade gift sets made by Sweet Home Bath, signed books, bookmarks and more. Plus, at the end of the conference, we will be sending one winner home with all of the books left on our bookshelf! You do not want to miss our booth this year.

NOT ATTENDING BEA, BUT WANT SOME GOODIES?

If you aren’t attending BEA but would like some of our Swagalicious goodies, we have a giveaway just for you. Enter below to win the above Clean Teen Publishing gift set (includes small lotion, lip balm and bath soak) made by Sweet Home Bath. We will also throw in some extra surprise swag and your choice of any digital book from CTP!

This is a US only giveaway, however, if an International winner is chosen, we will offer you your choice of any three digital CTP books.

GIVEAWAY TIME:

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