Telford Vice's Blog, page 384

No Smith. No Kallis. Now what?

SA Cricket Magazine

Telford Vice, Johannesburg

There is nothing strange about something going bump at 21 minutes past 10 on a common or garden Monday night. But this something did not go bump. Instead, it crashed. It boomed. It banged.

It was a release from Cricket SA confirming Graeme Smith’s retirement from the international game. How and why he hell had this happened, and happened on the night of the third day of the deciding Test against Australia at Newlands?

Let’s not go there, because as t...

The obscenely talented boy next door

http://www.GOcricket.com -http://www.gocricket.com/columns/telford-vice/IPL-7-AB-de-Villiers-the-obscenely-talented-boy-next-door/articleshow/35057005.cms

TELFORD VICE, Johannesburg

“So, what’s he like,” asked a friend who does not have to put up with cricket and cricketers for a living. Oh dear. Did he have to? The question brings out the worst in reporters, who when they are asked to provide a character reference for a player cannot help but reach for the big book of stereotypes.

“Arrogant,” t...

Klusener’s ‘uncertainty’ over future to be addressed

Times Media

TELFORD VICE, Johannesburg

Having guided the Dolphins to their first title in seven seasons last summer, Lance Klusener would have been forgiven for thinking his job was safe.

However, a decision on Klusener’s long-term future as Dolphins coach was not taken at a KZN Cricket board meeting on Friday.

“There was uncertainty before the meeting, but Graham (Abrahams, who chairs the board) phoned me on Saturday and said they are willing to enter into negotiations,” Klusener said yesterday....

Sinister southpaws not left behind in SA

Times Media

TELFORD VICE, Johannesburg

SA capped 37 test players in the 10-and-a-half years that separated the debuts of Brett Schultz and Charl Willoughby. Unlike Schultz and Willoughby, cackhanded quicks both, not one of the 37 was a left-arm fast bowler.

Of the 38 test caps SA have handed to seam bowlers of any stripe – including allrounders – since the end of isolation, only four have gone to southpaw slingers. That, at least, dovetails with the fact that around 10% of the world’s population...

IPL cash a ‘culture shock’ for SA players

Times Media

TELFORD VICE, Johannesburg

The Indian Premier League (IPL) made Chris Morris cheat on the love of his life. Or, as Morris admitted yesterday, “I’ve upgraded.”

Before he went off to play for the Chennai Super Kings in last year’s IPL, Morris swore allegiance to the car he had driven since high school, a VW Golf 6. “I love it … I call it the ‘Blue Ninja’,” he said last February.

But US$625 000, or more than R5.5-million at the prevailing exchange rate, which was the price Morris fetched...

Lies, damned lies, and cricketers

http://www.gocricket.com – http://www.gocricket.com/Lies-damned-lies-and-cricketers/Telford-Vice/columnshow/34739983.cms

TELFORD VICE, Johannesburg

Vernon Philander told us stats do not lie. Damn straight. What he did not say was that cricketers lie – do not believe them when they say they have as much use for rankings as they have for a dead cat.

To see the boundless joy that turned South Africa’s hard men into crowing little boys as they tore about stodgy old Lord’s itself on August 20, 2012 i...

Steyn, De Villiers have a smashing time together

Times Media

TELFORD VICE, Johannesburg

Dale Steyn does not usually greet batsmen who have smashed him for 22 runs in a single over with an enthusiastic hug, but this was different.

The batsman was AB de Villiers, whose 89 not out off 41 balls powered Royal Challengers Bangalore to victory by four wickets over Sunrisers Hyderabad in their Indian Premier League (IPL) match in Bangalore on Sunday.

Seldom is Steyn deposited for over square leg, over his head and over fine leg for six as well as throu...

Aussie test team 0.3505434782609 points better than SA

Times Media

TELFORD VICE, Johannesburg

The International Cricket Council (ICC) have confirmed what fans have known since March – that Australia are a better test team than SA.

How much better? Stand by for a big small number: 0.3505434782609. That is the difference between Australia’s ratings points and SA’s in the latest ICC rankings.

Minuscule though the gap is numerically, its significance is that it ends SA’s reign as test cricket’s best team. They were on top from August, 2012 for 21 months...

IPL helps Kallis stay in World Cup frame

Times Media

TELFORD VICE, Johannesburg

Jacques Kallis does not do vulnerability. He also does not do shopping malls. But there he was a few days ago in a photograph he posted on Twitter, covering his eyes amid the cacophony of capitalism that is Dubai Mall.

“I can’t look,” Kallis captioned his picture. “Somebody come save me.”

Above him as he stood in front of a prettily pink shop, a soaring sign gave a clue to what Kallis could not countenance: “Victoria’s Secret”.

According to Dave Rundle, Kalli...

Cricket or no cricket, we still know what the suits did last summer

Gocricket.com – http://www.gocricket.com/Cricket-or-no-cricket-we-still-know-what-the-suits-did-last-summer/Telford-Vice/columnshow/34366374.cms

TELFORD VICE, Johannesburg

Even as the county season goes gently into that good afternoon and the Indian Premier League rages hard across the night sky, in South Africa cricket is nothing more than a warming thought against the bleak reality of looming winter.

It would be spurious to suggest the season is over. To say cricket still respects a season is...