Arlene Miller's Blog, page 3

Manifestation – Part 4: Terminology

Image by Ruby Montalvo from Pixabay

As with other “fields of study,” manifesting has its own vocabulary and concepts. Here are some of the most common:

Creation is done – Just about everyone I have listened to utters this sentence. The belief is that creation is done, and all possibilities exist. Unlimited versions of you exist, and you just need to step into the one that has the thing or person that you want. 

Parallel universes/changing your state – Not all manifestation “experts” talk about parallel universes, but if unlimited versions of us exist, it follows that there must be parallel universes. Some coaches say we are stepping in and out of different states (or universes?) all the time without knowing it. Some say you can tell, and that sometimes you notice sme things are slightly different because you have stepped into a new “state.”

3D/4D – The 3D is the world around you, what you have always considered reality. But manifestation considers your imagination (4D) your only reality — and what you see as 3D is just a reflection of how you see the world, and what you see is the old story — your old manifestations. When you are trying to manifest something, you are advised to not let what you experience in the 3D trigger you. Example: You are trying to manifest an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend back.  In the 3D you find out they have a new love. You are advised to not let that bother you, and continue to manifest them. Are you a relationship wrecker? Not according to the next concept.

No manipulation – You cannot manipulate others. You can only change yourself. So manifesting your ex back even though they have a new relationship is OK. You are not changing them. You are changing you. Or maybe you are stepping into the version of you that has this relationship. “You don’t get what you want. You get who you are.” Manifestation is all about becoming the person who has what you want.” If that is difficult to wrap your head around, try the next one. 

Revision – Didn’t like something that happened in your 3D day? Change it! What????? Yup, revision is going  back and changing something in the past so that it happened as you would have liked it to. You can revise as many things from your past as you want. Something in your childhood? Revise. Something that happened this morning? Revise. Neville Goddard, whom I have mentioned before, and you cannot talk about the Law of Assumption without mentioning, advises that every night before bed, one goes through their day and revises anything that didn’t happen exactly as they would have wanted it. I have tried it with things that happened long ago, and it did blunt the emotional effect it had on me. In manifestation there is no future and no past. There is only now. (Have you read The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle?) The past is malleable. Consider the fact that two people who experienced the same event in the past remember it completely differently. Revision helps you get rid of limiting beliefs you have because of your background and experiences. One of my favorite coaches said revision changed her life.

Mental diet – This is related to self-concept. A good mental diet is good for your self-concept. Self-concept is not really the same as self-esteem. Self-concept is who you believe you are. And who you believe you are when you are manifesting should be the version of you who has what you want. You must embody (there’s another common term) that version of yourself.

You – You are not that character you see in the mirror. That is your human part. We are all connected as one consciousness. That is our higher self. Our higher self (God) is what manifests. Not our human self. I have not heard every coach say that, but I have heard it many times.

List technique/ build up your faith – Some coaches recommend things like the list technique to build up your faith in manifestation. Choose random small things that you would like to manifest and then forget about it. Do not dwell on them. See what happens! By small things, I mean a free cup of coffee, a duck in the middle of the road, twins wearing blue dresses — you get the idea. And manifestations do not always happen immediately.

The sabbath — You are working on manifesting for a while. Maybe you are using visualization, maybe affirmations. After a while, you feel that it is done and will come to be. You are relaxed. That is called being in the Sabbath — waiting for your manifestation — even though you are not supposed to “wait” for it. 

Birds before land – Sometimes you will see clues that your manifestation is coming in the 3D world — which you are supposed to sort of ignore. (Don’t ask me; I am just the messenger of these ideas!) Maybe you have been manifesting a new love. Someone does come into the picture, but it is short lived, and that person is not quite right. Is that a sign that your manifestation is working? You are manifesting money. You come into some money, but not nearly the amount you are trying to manifest. A clue that your manifesting is working out? You are trying to manifest an ex back. You  hear her name everywhere and see the color and make of her car everywhere. Is that a sign? Some say there are no signs because the 3D is an old story.

Bridge of incidents – When you manifest something you DO NOT need to know how it is going to happen. That is not your job or your business.The universe will move things around to get you what you want. It might take a lot of steps, but you don’t need to be concerned with it. Example: You are trying to manifest a promotion. But your co-worker gets promoted instead. You are crushed. A month later that co-worker gets job in the city across the country where his girlfriend lives. He takes the job. You get his. Done!

SATS – This is a really common one, named by Neville Goddard. It means State Akin to Sleep. It is the time when you are drowsy, but not quite asleep. Your brain is in an alpha or theta state, not the active beta state or the sleeping delta state. When you are relaxed like this, your thoughts have more access to the subconscious. If you visualize in this state, it is easier to leave an imprint on your subconscious and plant the seed for your manifestation. One of the coaches who resonates with me the most highly recommends trying to get to that state, which is easiest when going to bed and just waking up. I have never been able to do it without falling asleep first! It is not easy. 

Vibration– What is this vibration stuff? Mostly it belongs to the Law of Attraction, not this Law of Assumption, both manifesting laws. The Law of Attraction says you need to match the vibration of what you want to manifest to draw it to you. I don’t know all that much about the Law of Attraction although I read The Secret more than once and saw the movie. I did try to raise my vibration once with the same thing I am trying to manifest now, and I had some results.

Meditation/hypnosis – I don’t have the patience to meditate, but there are manifestation meditations online to manifest certain things. Also meditation is good for manifesting because of the relaxed state it puts you into. Add hypnosis to that. There are also hypnosis videos as well as coaches who will make a specific hypnosis “tape” for you.

Inspired action – Perhaps I have not mentioned that you don’t actually need to DO anything to manifest. If you want to manifest money, you don’t have to work harder. To a point. If you want to start a business, you might have to do something. If you want to manifest a relationship, you might have to leave the house, although some say you don’t have to. But inspired action is action apparently unrelated to your manifestation. Going on five dating apps if you are trying to manifest a relationship is not inspired action. (It isn’t even wise action! LOL) But a sudden urge to get your daily coffee at a new coffee shop one day might be inspired action. You don’t know why you are driven to do it, but then you meet someone there. That is an example of inspired action.

SP– The old SP is probably the most common manifestation: Specific Person. This person can be an ex. It seems that it usually is. Some coaches deal primarily with helping you get your ex back. If your ex was lacking in some way, in manifestation you are supposed to be able to get the version of your ex that you would have liked, not the one that may have caused issues. In my opinion, an ex is easier to get back than any other type of SP, simply because lots of exes get back together anyway. But that is just my opinion. It is supposed to be as easy to manifest a celebrity specific person  — or someone who doesn’t know you exist that you are interested in — as an ex. And then you can of course manifest someone you don’t know yet, just a love relationship where you create a list of traits you want in the person. Ultimately, everyone agrees there are no “big” and “small”  manifestations. They are all as “easy” to get as the next one. A celebrity specific person is as easy to manifest as a free cup of coffee or a duck in the middle of the road. Go figure. Oh, and a specific person can also refer to anyone and doesn’t have to be a love relationship. It can refer to a family member or a friend or a boss or anyone you would like a relationship or a better relationship with.

and this big one —

I AM  – This one is from the AI explanation on Google: The phrase “I am” is a fundamental declaration of existence and identity. It affirms the speaker’s current state of being and serves as a basis for self-identification. In various contexts, it can have deeper meanings, such as emphasizing one’s divine nature, expressing self-acceptance, or affirming a personal identity. 

And yes, you can manifest for other people if you would like to help them out.

Yeah, I know that was a lot. Next week the conclusion: Some manifestation gurus.

 

 

Manifestation: Part 3

Your new Maserati!

If you want to learn more from the granddaddy of the Law of Assumption, listen to Neville Goddard or read his books. The best book to read is the short, easy-to-understand Feeling Is the Secret.

Goddard has many lectures on You Tube, but because he was long ago and You Tube is now, there are many questionable and AI versions of his lectures. I have listened to parts of a couple of his lectures, and there is one  (at least) manifestation coach who often posts a video where she picks aparts and explains his lectures.  More about her in the next post. I have his complete collection of books, but I don’t know if I will ever get through them. They are pretty repetitive — and as I probably said last week — contain many Biblical references.

OK, so you want to manifest something: A new love, an old love you want back, money, a successful business, a Maserati, a beautiful house in the country, a better relationship with your mother, a free trip to Belize. What do you do?

Well, you could make a vision board and stare at it every now and then. Never worked for me, but many people find them helpful. But it likely isn’t enough. You could pray for it (which is pretty much like manifesting if you really believe). Or you can think about it all the time and wish for it. Likely not enough.

The key is that you must feel as if it is already yours. That is the tricky part. Should you be delusional and believe it is yours even though you can see in the 3-D (physical) world that you don’t have it? And even if you could see doing that, what about all you picked up as a child and beyond: I can’t have that! I am not good enough for her! I will never have money because my parents were poor!

So, you need to get rid of the limiting beliefs, or at least recognize that they are there and work on them. Coaches do disagree on these points. BUT you do need to somehow feel it is already yours. If it involves a relationship with someone, manifestation does not imply that you can change them. It is very clear that you can change only self. So, you must change in order to be the version of yourself that would have what it is that you want. Coaches vary: some say if you want to be married, wear a wedding ring and act as if you are married. Most say there are infinite versions of you (and maybe infinite universes that we move through), so you need to be that version of yourself that has what you desire. 

How do you get there? You don’t need to do anything to get there except believe. REALLY BELIEVE. There are techniques to help you get there, but the techniques are only tools. They themselves do not manifest. You need to get to the end in your mind.  Here are some of the techniques; you may have heard of some.

Affirmations – Telling yourself positive things to help clean up your self concept. Everything always works out for me. I am perfect as I am. I am beautiful. Loves comes easily to me. I have all the money I need. My partner loves me.  You get the idea. Some coaches love them; others don’t. I don’t. Sometimes it is just saying things to yourself you don’t believe, but some say after a while you believe them. Everyone prefers different techniques and finds certain ones more beneficial.Scripting – Obviously writing something down. I have not really done scripting per se. You would write out maybe a conversation you would be having with a friend about your new relationship and how wonderful it is. Something to indicate you are living in the end and have your desire.Inner conversations – This is pretty much like scripting but without writing. I do this sometimes. It could be a conversation with your boss congratulating you on the promotion you are  trying to manifest. Or maybe you are sitting with your new spouse at the kitchen table talking about how happy you both are. Or going into the showroom and buying your new Maserati with cash. These are conversations, not to be confused with the next technique.Visualization – This is by far my favorite and the one I use most of the time. You picture the manifestation as already done by some scene you create. You don’t need to use the same scene all the time, but you can. Up to you. Some rules: You need to be in the scene, not watching it like you are watching yourself on a screen. It is best to use as many of your senses as possible: obviously sight, as detailed as you can get it, even it you have to make it up; sound; smell; touch; all of it, or as much of it as you can. Apparently some people cannot visualize and see only black, but I have never had that problem. So what is the difference between visualization and daydreaming, you ask? Daydreaming is wishful thinking. Visualization is living in the end, believing so much that what you desire is yours that you assume (law of assumption) that it will happen —  to the point that when it comes, you are not surprised.

Well, I think I might need two more posts to complete this. So next week, a couple of other “techniques” and some odds and end before the last installment where I talk about some of the coaches. 

 

 

 

Manifestation: Part 2

Image by Eva Michálková from Pixabay

It is difficult to talk or write about manifestation because there is so much, and everyone has different thoughts and ideas about it. Neville Goddard has lots of books, but he is difficult to understand. There are a multitude of coaches and other “experts” on YouTube (and TIK TOK, which I don’t watch; it seems less legit). 

Here is what I have learned:

We are always manifesting, although most of the time unintentionally. What your 3-D world looks like, well, you created it. Sometimes it is obvious; people who are pessimistic and think they can’t have what they want, generally don’t. People who are positive thinking are generally more successful. People who have more self-confidence seem to have more “luck.” It goes as far as this manifestation thought from Neville: “Everyone is you pushed out.” This means that your reality is a reflection of what you believe. People show up in your world according to your expectations of them.

The kind of manifesting everyone is interested in is intentional: when you want something and you don’t know how to get it, you turn to manifesting. However, this is also true in manifestation: “You don’t get what you want; you get who you are. There is no one to change but self.” You get what you assume to be true, thus the name “law of assumption.” Assumption sounds easy, but it is not. All those things you learned as you grew up, all those limiting beliefs, make it difficult to assume certain things. So you need to clean up your “mental diet.”  And you generally, according to manifestation people, don’t need years of therapy to do this. Paying close attention to your beliefs and assumptions helps.

Here are some other common beliefs about manifestation:

You can manifest anything if you can imagine it. 

Big things are no more difficult to manifest than small things.

You should be able to feel your desire as real with all your senses, to live in the end. Neville’s best book — and a short, easy-to-read one — is Feeling Is the Secret. There are techniques to get there, and people often think the techniques are the answer. The techniques are only the methods to help you get to “feeling it as real” — without being delusional.

Manifesting is not the same as daydreaming or wishful thinking. With daydreaming and wishful thinking, there is no real assumption that you are going to change anything. 

Neville Goddard quotes the Bible a great deal – but he looks at the Bible as a metaphor rather than taking it literally. One of the coaches I will talk about in a future installment makes videos deciphering some of his books and lectures. 

Some coaches say to build up your faith in manifesting by starting with really small things that you are not attached to attracting. For example, you might try to manifest seeing a yellow butterfly — or getting a free cup of coffee.

There are different thoughts about what I am going to mention now, but it seems most coaches believe them:

Creation is finished. Therefore, every combination of everything is somewhere, and you simply need to shift into that reality. Yes, it is the idea of parallel or multiple universes. There is a version of you for everything imaginable. And, you, in human form, is not all that you are. You are actually God, and we are all connected as such in a collective consciousness. That is what manifests, not the human you, which cannot manifest. That may or may not agree with your religious beliefs. Nonetheless, that is the common thought in manifestation and the Law of Assumption. 

Next Installment: The techniques and the notion of revision

Final Installment: Some of the coaches I have found and either resonated with — or not.

 

 

 

 

 

Manifestation Part 1

Image by Pexels from PixabayThe dictionary definition of “to manifest”: 1. to make clear or evident; show plainly2. to prove; put beyond doubt or question3. to attempt to attain (something desired) by thinking or focusing intensely on it, especially as a spiritual act4. to record in the manifest of a ship, airplane, train 

What I am talking about here is definition #3. Is manifestation WooWoo or is it scientific? Or both? Or neither? My personal opinion is that it is somewhere between both and neither.

I have been studying (reading, watching Youtube videos, and practicing) manifestation for a couple of years. However, I have dabbled in it now and then for much longer. I have always been attracted to weird things: aliens, crop circles, remote viewing, backwards speech, and other ideas I used to get from listening to the late Art Bell on the radio. Anyone else listen to him???

When most people think of manifestation they might think of vision boards. That is likely the first thing I ever did related to manifesting. You take a piece of cardboard and some old magazines, and you cut out pictures of things or ideas you would like to see in your future. Then, in five years, you take out your old vision board (which you are supposed to place where you will frequently see it) and say, “Look at that picture of a house! That is exactly the dream house I live in now!” (Well, maybe.)

Then in 2006, Rhonda Byrne wrote The Secret, which was about the Law of Attraction (LOA). Then there was a movie made from the book. Around the same time, there was a movie called What the Bleep? which was about the spiritual connection between quantum physics and consciousness, and the idea of a common consciousness.

The idea of the Law of Attraction is to raise your vibration to match the vibration of what you want. You do this partly by envisioning that you already have what you want. If you want to read about the Law of Attraction, Esther Hicks has several books. She speaks through an entity called Abraham. That whole thing never resonated with me. However, when I “raised my vibration” by redoing myself inside and out (I won’t go into details), I seemed to get some of my manifestation (which is the same one I am still working on). This was a couple of years ago. I raised my mood, so I felt my vibration was higher….

Then, maybe a year ago, I discovered the “other” LOA: The Law of Assumption. This law has some similarities with the Law of Attraction, but is also very different. It is self-explanatory. To get what you want, you must assume it is already true. Sounds simple. Not so much though. 

Why do people manifest in the first place? People come to manifestation because they want something, and they do not know how else to get it. This might be love, money, a house, a new job, etc. The most common manifestations are for love and money. The love manifestation is called the SP( special person). This person might be an ex you want back (very common), someone you know, or maybe even just a relationship with someone you have not yet discovered.

The granddaddy of the Law of Assumption is Neville Goddard.  Goddard was a writer and mystic from Barbados, who learned about the law from the rabbi Abdul. Goddard lived from 1907 to 1975. The basic tenet of this law: You must feel it as real with all your senses. You must live in the end. 

In the next installment of this series, I will talk about what you actually do to manifest in this way and some of the basic thoughts about this law. 

Two more things. 

You have obviously seen manifestation, maybe in your own life. People who are  pessimistic and don’t think they can accomplish things, usually don’t. Athletes often practice in their imagination to improve their performance. I will leave you with this. The law of assumption states that the imagination is as real as the 3D (a common term in manifestation, which of course means what we think of as reality.) And if you think about it, all creation does begin in the imagination.

 

 

 

 

Throwback Saturday!

This is the very first post to appear on the Grammar Diva Blog, way back in 2013! (edited of course)

Welcome to the Grammar Diva blog….here you will find grammar information, interesting articles, and hopefully your input! We welcome guest bloggers, questions, comments, stories, and anything else that will make this an entertaining place to be! Of course we can’t always write about grammar (well, I guess we could), so we can also talk about books, publishing, words,  language and my favorite topic — coffee! (which I don’t believe I ever have!) So, grab your cup of java and read on (this is actually  a reprint of a guest blog I wrote for someone else’s blog) — 

TYPO Is (Sometimes) Just a Euphemism!

In 2008 editor Jeff Deck and former Dartmouth College student Benjamin Herson undertook The Great Typo Hunt, a road trip from coast to coast of the United States in which they located and corrected typos! Their journey was been made into a book and a blog. I will give you the link later. Mr. Deck, a former spelling bee champion, and his friend Benjamin Herson found over 400 typos on their trip….and they corrected about 55 percent of them — sometimes getting into a little hot water!

They did have some ground rules: 1. The typos needed to be in public  – things that everyone could see, like menus and signs. 2. They would not be unkind to those whose native language is not English. 3. They corrected only text, not any speech. 4. They learned not to correct a menu item until after the food was served!

Now, you and I both know that these really were not all typos….a typo occurs when your fingers inadvertently hit the wrong key. For the most part, these were simply common mistakes.

As an editor, teacher, and author, I know a mistake when I see one (or hear one)! What do you think are some of the most common mistakes in grammar (“grammar” meaning spelling, punctuation, and usage)?

In no real particular order, here are the Top Four Grammar Mistakes that I see:

4. There is no apostrophe in a plain old plural noun.

Here are my vacation photo’s! What?? Oh, you mean photos!! Don’t put an apostrophe in a plural noun unless it is a number, letter, or symbol (a’s, 5’s, &’s). Apostrophes are for possession.

3. Don’t use your when you mean you’re. I hope your coming with us. Huh??? Oh, you mean you’re! You’re is the contraction meaning you are. Your is a possessive adjective (for example, your shirt).

2. We were all corrected to use I when we said, “My friend and me are going to the movies.” However, sometimes me is the correct word to use (same goes for us, her, him, them, and whom). He gave the tickets to my friend and me. Using I is incorrect here. You wouldn’t say, “He gave the tickets to I,” so you don’t say he and I either. Between you and I is also incorrect. Between you and me is the correct way to write or say it. The rule is to use the pronouns I, we, he, she, they, and who when used as the subject of a sentence (or a predicate nominative, which is a noun or pronoun that comes after a verb of being. For example, “It is I” and “This is she” are both correct. “It is me” is incorrect.). Use me, us, him, her, them, and whom when used as the direct object, indirect object, or object of a preposition in a sentence. The boss promoted him and me (direct objects). The boss gave her and him raises (indirect object). The boss gave the account to him and me (object of the preposition to).

1. Do not separate two sentences with a comma….EVER!! You will have a run-on sentence, otherwise, known as a comma splice (a definite no-no). I hope you can attend the meeting, it will be very productive. Sorry, no way. There are several ways to fix a run on.

I hope you can attend the meeting. It will be very productive. or

I hope you can attend the meeting; it will be very productive. or

I hope you can attend the meeting because it will be very productive.

–Arlene Miller, Your Grammar Diva

If you would like more information about The Great Typo Hunt: The Great Typo Hunt 

Or just Google it!

 

 

Uh-Oh! It’s Thursday!

Image by Heiko Stein from Pixabay

It’s Thursday. And by Thursday,  I have likely thought about my blog post earlier in the week. But on Thursday, if I still haven’t decided what to write about or haven’t yet written a word, I begin to worry. My blog post is automatically sent out on Saturday mornings about 11 a.m. EST. If it isn’t done, whatever is last there is sent out by my mailing service. So, that would be the same post as last week. Not satisfactory!

I like to have my post completed on Thursday, so I don’t feel under the gun on Friday, especially if I have plans for Friday.  I had planned to write about manifestation (one of  my current fascinations), but I don’t have enough brainpower to deal with that this week. But soon…

Grammar is still part of my life (and always has been in some form), but it has taken a back burner to some other things at this point in my life. Twelve grammar books — or however many it is — is probably enough for one person to write, although I do have ideas for more. And fiction, well, is hard to sell, and I don’t think it comes very naturally to me. I thought my first attempt at a novel (Birds of  a Feather) was pretty good. But my romance novel lingers on the shelf. Who knows if I will ever finish it? Frankly, I am spoiled because grammar books (good ones like mine ) sell with hardly any effort.

My life right now consists of mostly reading (and coffee), music, studying and practicing manifestation, and hanging out with a very select group of people: one or two close friends and my daughter, son-in-law, and granddaughter (and I really don’t hang out with then all that much). I have a fair number of friends and acquaintances in Massachusetts, California, and elsewhere in Florida, so there is a little travel included too. Add to this some political activity including three clubs. And I still belong to two publishing groups, one of which has  a monthly Zoom meeting I really enjoy attending.

I will definitely write at least one post about manifestation soon. And I already write a book post every couple of months. I won’t get into politics here (unless you really want me to) because every time I post anything political, someone tells me to “stick to grammar.”

Music is very exciting right now. I wrote a bunch of songs when I was a teenager, mostly lyrics. Last year I found them and scanned them all into my computer. They were obviously decades old and typed on a manual typewriter. A few had melodies.

I love music people. My son played percussion and guitar in the school band. My daughter skated and danced and played drums for a while. My son-in-law plays guitar, writes songs, and does some gigs. My best friend’s husband and son-in-law are both guitarists. When I lived in California, I had jams at my house. I have three friends there who are guitarists, and I also know a fiddler and band director.

I have not managed to find a music community here in Florida. But I have amassed many musician friends on social media. Some I have met and some I have not. Some are in Florida; others are not. Some are very well known; others are not. The most significant  synchronicity was running across someone who is a real pro with a very impressive resume. He has worked with everyone (well, almost), has written songs, and mostly been an arranger and musical director. I told him I had always wanted to be a songwriter. He knew I wrote books, so he told me I could probably write lyrics. I told him I had, and I sent him a few of my songs.  He loved one of them and wrote music for it, so we are now collaborating on that one. He is making a demo. It has taken me decades, but I am finally doing what I have always wanted to do. I recently wrote both songs and lyrics  for a song I wrote for a special someone and sent it to him. It was low tech, but I love the song.

Technology is my issue. I am a novice. I cannot even figure out how to work my piano keyboard! And I want to be able to use music software. Right now I am working on two songs I wrote long ago. One has only music and no words. The other has both, but needs work.

I spend (“waste,” I was going to say) a lot of time reading and listening to manifestation videos on YouTube! And I still run my book business: tracking sales, doing some advertising, keeping the books, writing daily grammar social media posts, and writing weekly blog posts.

Sorry if this post is a little disjointed….but yes, there will be lots more grammar posts!

 

The Case for the Oxford Comma

Image by Peter from PixabayBest of the Grammar Diva…

We invited the two supermodels, Bruce Springsteen and Mick Jagger to the party.

What’s that? Read that again? When you read that sentence, it might appear that Bruce Springsteen and Mick Jagger are supermodels. Well, while some may think so, probably not. Try putting a comma between Springsteen and and. Clearer? Should be. Now, you can tell that two supermodels were invited to the party and so were the Springsteen and Jagger. Four people, not two.

That comma makes all the difference. That comma is called the “series comma,” or by its more lofty name, the Oxford comma. It is thus named because it was first used by the Oxford University Press. It is that comma before the and that introduces the final item in a series within a sentence. In the United States, it is common to use the Oxford comma. And although it is obviously used by Oxford University, most of the rest of England shuns its use. Most of the time, it makes no difference whether or not you use it, and it is a matter of personal choice. Here is an example:

The bowl contained apples, oranges, grapes, and strawberries. OR

The bowl contained apples, oranges, grapes and strawberries.

Most of the time, it really makes no difference whether or not you use it . Sometimes, such as in the example at the beginning of this post, the sentence is confusing and misleading unless you use the comma. Less commonly (in my opinion, since I am pro-Oxford comma), it is confusing to use it. Look at this example:

Attending the meeting were Mr. Jones, Mrs. Greene, Mr. Level, the mayor, and Mr. Falk. 

Those who are anti-Oxford comma would say that the comma before the and is confusing and makes it look as though there are five people attending the meeting.  They say that if you remove the comma before and, it becomes obvious that Mr. Level is the mayor, and there are only four people attending the meeting:

Attending the meeting were Mr. Jones, Mrs. Greene, Mr. Level, the mayor and Mr. Falk.

In my (not so) humble opinion, it is confusing either way. That’s what semi-colons are for (well, one thing they are for): to separate the main items in a series where there might already be commas:

Attending the meeting were Mr. Jones; Mrs. Greene; Mr. Level, the mayor; and Mr. Falk. 

In the above sentence we can tell for sure that Mr. Level is indeed the mayor.

Attending the meeting were Mr. Jones, Mrs. Greene, Mr. Level, the mayor, and Mr. Falk.

And now in the above sentence, we know that he is NOT the mayor. 

However, as long as you make exceptions when your meaning isn’t clear, it is up to you whether or not you use the Oxford comma. Some find that it clutters writing (Oh, really! It is so small!)

There is no right way or wrong way. The only thing is to be consistent. Once you have decided which way you will do things within a piece of writing (with the exception of clearing up fuzzy meanings by adding it or removing it) either use it or don’t.

For more information on the Oxford comma, you may want to look at these:

Monkey See – Going, Going, And Gone?  No, The Oxford Comma Is Safe … For Now

and if you dare….

Vampire Weekend:Oxford Comma Lyrics

 

Whatcha Readin’?

Image by Square Frog from Pixabay

Well, here is what I have been reading since I last wrote a books post. As you see, I had a little binge on Freida McFadden, who is pretty popular and writes thrillers. 

Sunset Beach – Mary Kay Andrews – A little bit of romance, a little bit of living on the beach, and a mystery. Good read. I gave it four out of five stars. Recommended more for the ladies.Never Lie – Freida McFadden – Good one. A couple shopping for a home is trapped in a spooky old house they visit in a blizzard. The house was owned and lived in by a renowned psychiatrist who disappeared. Four stars plus.Looking for Alaska – John Green – I read this young adult book for a banned book club I just joined. It is a great book, funny with some fascinating teenage characters at a boarding school. Why banned? Well, I don’t think any book should be banned. Not appropriate for grade school kids, since it deals with depression and suicidal thoughts. Older teens and adults will enjoy it. Four stars.Every Tom Dick and Harry – Elinor Lipman – I read this because I read most of Lipman’s books. She writes the type of books I like although this one wasn’t very riveting. She graduated from the same college as I did a year before me, and I vaguely remember her from then. And she made it quite big as an author. This one is about a realtor, her roommate, and a house of ill repute. I didn’t love it, but a lot of people did. Three stars from me.Do Not Disturb – Freida McFadden – To avoid spending her life in prison, a young woman runs away, stopping at a creepy motel…called a Hitchcock-type thriller. Four stars from me. The Perfect Son – Freida McFadden – A high school girl has vanished, and suspicion arises against the boy who last saw her. The police suspect murder. The boy’s mother wonders if her son could have actually done it. Four stars.The Inmate – Freida McFadden – A nurse practitioner begins a job in a maximum security prison. And unknown to the other employees, one of the inmates is her ex. Five stars.The Housemaid’s Secret – Freida McFadden – A maid with a past is hired to clean a penthouse. She needs to keep this job. But what about the wife who is in the bedroom? Four stars.The Teacher – Freida McFadden – A high school is rocked by a student-teacher affair. Five stars. It is a thriller. No sex involved as far as I can remember!A Brief Welcome to the Universe – Neil deGrasse Tyson – I gave this book four stars because I know it is a good book. I don’t remember much about it or how much I understood it. It talks about the universe. How did it begin? Why is it constantly expanding? It gives a good picture of just what infinity means.Midnight at the Blackbird Cafe – Heather Webber – A cafe in the mountains and magical blackbirds. The granddaughter of the late owner comes to take care of the cafe and probably sell it, but she falls in love with it, deciding to change her life plans.  It was a good book, but not great. Three stars.

 

You’re Going the Wrong Way!!!

Image by Adam Tumidajewicz from Pixabay

“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I, I took the one less traveled by, and that had made all the difference.”

Robert Frost may have taken the road less traveled, but I feel I took the one more traveled — and it also made a difference.

I started thinking about this, when about a month ago, I ran across a manifestation video on You Tube. I am very interested in manifestation (which I will go into in another post someday) and watch a lot of videos by various people. But you don’t need to understand manifestation to know what I am talking about here. 

This woman was someone I had never watched before and never heard of. I haven’t watched her since, and I don’t remember her name. I think I may have started another of  her videos, but it didn’t grab me like the previ0us one did.

Most people who manifest are trying to manifest either money or a Special Person — in other words a soulmate, who is usually, but not always, an ex they want back. 

I don’t even remember the exact words this person used, but I remember the gist of what she said. She asked,”Why do you think you have never found your s0ulmate? You are living the wrong life!”

That hit home. I believe that is true for me. Now, I have two children and a grandchild that I love more than life itself and to the ends of the Earth and farther. But if had pursued the “other life,” I wouldn’t know any better. That is, unless there are parallel universes where we are living multiple versions of our lives (let’s not even go into that).

I think I took the path of least resistance , pleasing my parents and making it more comfortable for me. Once again, disregarding the path that I did choose and its obvious high points, I think it was the wrong choice looking back. But maybe it was the right choice then?

I started writing poetry in childhood and songs in my early teens — either handwritten or on a manual typewriter. I must have written over a hundred songs. I had one of them made into a demo by one of those scam companies that said they would try to sell your song. They put my words to an awful melody with a terrible singer and made it a country song. Needless to say, that was the end of that.

Every week I read Billboard Magazine. I listened to my transistor radio constantly. My high school yearbook said my ambition was to be a songwriter. So I should have been New York City bound, especially since I was accepted with a scholarship to Barnard College (Columbia’s sister school). I would have majored in English (I didn’t have the background to get into a music school), but I would have been in the midst of the recording industry, especially when it came time to look for a job.

But I lived near Boston, Massachusetts and also got accepted at Simmons College in Boston with a scholarship. My parents didn’t want me to go to New York, I had a cousin who had just graduated from Simmons, and I could major in print media at Simmons, And I had morphed into wanting to write for Billboard Magazine if I couldn’t have a song on its charts.

So I went to Simmons, wandered from job to job, most of them connected to writing or journalism and most of them unfulfilling. I met a bunch of men who weren’t for me because my desire for someone in the music or entertainment industry never went away, as I more recently discovered. I ended up being a successful indie author, and for that I am grateful. I cannot complain about my life at all — but it wasn’t the one I truly fit into.

About a year or so ago, I was going through my mementos box, and I found all my songs. I was so glad I had saved them. I didn’t want to ever misplace them (as I had misplaced some important photos that I never found), so I scanned them all into my computer (and saved the hard copies).  I went through them to see if any of them could be reworked and put to music. (Several of them have the music written down, but most don’t. However, it is easier to write lyrics with a melody in mind, so most of them had a melody in my head at one time.)

Over the years I have developed social media (and some in-person) friendships with music people. Recently, I found someone who is a well-known arranger, music director, and songwriter. He has worked with many music people I know and love. He is now putting one of my old songs to music, and we plan to make a demo. He gives me a great deal of credibility.

Maybe I am just a VERY late bloomer????????

 

 

 

Kangaroo Words??

Image by David Nightingale from PixabayBest of The Grammar Diva

I had never heard of kangaroo words until recently, when a friend posted about them on social media. And they have nothing to do with Australia!

A kangaroo word carries within its spelling its own synonym, with the letters in the correct order, although not necessarily right in a row. For example: regulate  and rule or encourage and urge. They are difficult to think of, but more common than you might think.

They are called kangaroo words because they carry their smaller selves with them, as a kangaroo carries its joey, or baby, in its pouch. They are also called marsupial, swallow, or joey words. The term was popularized as a word game by Ben O’Dell in an article in The American Magazine in the 1950s, later reprinted in the Reader’s Digest.

Here are some more kangaroo words:

indolent – idlerambunctious – raucoussplotch – spotacrid – aridblossom – bloomchicken – henobserve – seeaction – actmasculine – male

And there are also twin kangaroo words. These words have two synonyms within them:

container – tin and candeteriorate – rot, die (and perhaps riot)diminutive – minute and minifeasted – ate and fed

And then there are grand kangaroo words. These carry two joeys, one inside the other

inflammable – flammable and flameaccustomed – used and usealone – lone and onechariot – cart and car

Yes, there are also anti-kangaroo words, which carry antonyms within them:

covert – overtanimosity – amitycourteous – curtfabrication – factfeast – fastshe – hethere – hereexacerbate – abate

You learn something new every day . . .