Ellis Vidler's Blog, page 28
April 2, 2011
Lay your money down, boys!
© Alfonso D'agostinoThose pesky verbs, lay and lie. The main problem is lay because it's the present tense of one verb and the past tense of another. It goes downhill from there. The underlying problem is that we hear it misused so often our ears are no longer trustworthy. I think you just have to memorize it and retrain your ear.lay, laid, laid - means to place or put something down, and it must have an object, something to receive the action. You can't just place or put; there has to be an object.Present tense: Gentlemen, lay your cards on the table. (Substitute place or put. Ask lay what? Cards.) Past tense: Yesterday he laid the flowers on the grave. (Substitute placed or put. Laid what? Flowers)Past participle: The wren had laid her eggs in the flower pot before. (Substitute had placed or had put. Had laid what? Eggs.)
lie, lay, lain - means to rest or recline, does not need an object
NASA. Hubble: N90 star-forming region Present tense: "When we have an urge to use an exotic word, let us lie down until the urge goes away." I think that's at least close to a line by James Kilpatrick. (Substitute rest or recline) He lies among the lilies in the field. rests/reclinesPast tense: All night he lay in the haystack, counting stars. (Substitute rested or reclined)Past participle: She had lain in the ditch for three days before being found. (Substitute had rested or had reclined)If you have any good examples, I'd love to see them. Or any quibbles—let me know that too.
March 28, 2011
Writing My First Children's Mystery Novel
My guest today is Jean Henry Mead, a mystery/suspense and western historical novelist. She's also an award-winning photojournalist. Today's she's talking about her children's mystery.
Post by Jean Henry Mead
I considered writing an autobiographical children's book for years before sitting down to write one. Solstice Publishing released it recently as
Mystery of Spider Mountain
and I'm well into the second novel of the Hamilton Kids' mystery series.
I'm a former news reporter with seven published nonfiction books and four novels, but I wondered about the language of middle school children. My five kids were grown and I had no grandchildren nearby in the 9-12 age range. So I read a number of books written by others although none of them were in the style I planned to write. What to do? A flyer from the Institute of Children's Literature arrived in the mail, so, on a whim, I submitted the test and was immediately accepted as a student. No surprise there. Still, I wondered whether I was wasting my money because I already knew how to write. It just goes to show that no matter how much experience you have, you can always learn more.
I'm not getting paid to sing the praises of the institute, but I must say that it was well worth the tuition. My instructor, Louise Munro Foley, an experienced children's writer, served as my mentor as I took my time writing the novel between other projects. One of the things I learned was that children must solve the mysteries on their own with only minimal help from parents and other adults. And I was encouraged to watch children's Saturday programming to learn their "language."
Fiction is rooted in fact and my three protagonists spent their formative years at the foot of a large hill in southern California, as I did with four younger brothers. Because the hill was inhabited by trap door spiders and an occasional tarantula that arrived on a banana boat from Central America, I called it Spider Mountain.
My brothers and I were close in age and explored our "mountain" together. The apron was filled with tall, blue lupines which bloomed nearly year round, and halfway up the hill was Dead Man's Tree. We called it that because a thickly-knotted rope hung from a limb that we swung on. At the end was a large loop. That prompted stories about horse thieves which we imagined had been hanged there.
A dirt road encircled the hill at three levels but was so chocked with rocks and clumps of weeds that even a bicycle would have had difficult passage. So we wondered how the people who lived at the summit were able to reach their home, and imagined everything from rock climbers to space ships and helicopters, although we'd never heard one in the area.
When I was twelve and old enough to babysit brothers who were nearly my own size, we climbed our mountain to spy on the mysterious house. What we found was a chain link fence restraining four large vicious-appearing dogs with mouths large enough to swallow a child whole. Or so we thought. It didn't take us long to scramble back down the hill to our own house. And, of course, we never told our parents.
When I began to write, I wondered again who those people were and how they arrived at their hilltop home. The house itself was a mystery but I had to decide which crime(s) the residents of the house had committed. And how the Hamilton kids would be able to bring them to justice. I then thought of the Ouija board we used to play with. That's when the spirit Bagnomi materialized and talked to the kids via the board.
My four brothers had to be reduced to two to make the story manageable. Even so, they were as unmanageable as my own brothers had been, so their widowed grandmother came to live with them—as ours had done. However, our grandmother didn't have bright red curly hair like Ronald McDonald, and wasn't interested in finding a husband. Even children's books need humor and the Hamilton Kids' grandmother provides that and more, along with an adopted Australian Shepherd with a penchant for chewing furniture.
Writing for children has opened a new vista for me, which I hope my young readers will enjoy as much as I enjoyed the writing. I'm currently working on the second novel in the series, The Ghost of Crimson Dawn, which takes place here in Wyoming, where the Hamilton Kids visit their Uncle Harry at his mountaintop ranch. There's a bit of autobiographical plotting in that book as well.
The book is currently available on Kindle and will be released in print later this spring. The third novel in my Logan & Cafferty mystery/suspense novel, Murder on the Interstate, is also due for release any day and I'm also working on an historical novel, No Escape: The Sweetwater Tragedy.
My website: http://www.jeanhenrymead.com/
Blog sites: http://mysteriouspeople.blogspot.com/
http://murderousmusings.blogspot.com/
http://writersofthewest.blogspot.com/
Facebook-Jean Henry Mead
Post by Jean Henry Mead
I considered writing an autobiographical children's book for years before sitting down to write one. Solstice Publishing released it recently as
Mystery of Spider Mountain
and I'm well into the second novel of the Hamilton Kids' mystery series. I'm a former news reporter with seven published nonfiction books and four novels, but I wondered about the language of middle school children. My five kids were grown and I had no grandchildren nearby in the 9-12 age range. So I read a number of books written by others although none of them were in the style I planned to write. What to do? A flyer from the Institute of Children's Literature arrived in the mail, so, on a whim, I submitted the test and was immediately accepted as a student. No surprise there. Still, I wondered whether I was wasting my money because I already knew how to write. It just goes to show that no matter how much experience you have, you can always learn more.
I'm not getting paid to sing the praises of the institute, but I must say that it was well worth the tuition. My instructor, Louise Munro Foley, an experienced children's writer, served as my mentor as I took my time writing the novel between other projects. One of the things I learned was that children must solve the mysteries on their own with only minimal help from parents and other adults. And I was encouraged to watch children's Saturday programming to learn their "language."
Fiction is rooted in fact and my three protagonists spent their formative years at the foot of a large hill in southern California, as I did with four younger brothers. Because the hill was inhabited by trap door spiders and an occasional tarantula that arrived on a banana boat from Central America, I called it Spider Mountain.
My brothers and I were close in age and explored our "mountain" together. The apron was filled with tall, blue lupines which bloomed nearly year round, and halfway up the hill was Dead Man's Tree. We called it that because a thickly-knotted rope hung from a limb that we swung on. At the end was a large loop. That prompted stories about horse thieves which we imagined had been hanged there.
A dirt road encircled the hill at three levels but was so chocked with rocks and clumps of weeds that even a bicycle would have had difficult passage. So we wondered how the people who lived at the summit were able to reach their home, and imagined everything from rock climbers to space ships and helicopters, although we'd never heard one in the area.
When I was twelve and old enough to babysit brothers who were nearly my own size, we climbed our mountain to spy on the mysterious house. What we found was a chain link fence restraining four large vicious-appearing dogs with mouths large enough to swallow a child whole. Or so we thought. It didn't take us long to scramble back down the hill to our own house. And, of course, we never told our parents.
When I began to write, I wondered again who those people were and how they arrived at their hilltop home. The house itself was a mystery but I had to decide which crime(s) the residents of the house had committed. And how the Hamilton kids would be able to bring them to justice. I then thought of the Ouija board we used to play with. That's when the spirit Bagnomi materialized and talked to the kids via the board.
My four brothers had to be reduced to two to make the story manageable. Even so, they were as unmanageable as my own brothers had been, so their widowed grandmother came to live with them—as ours had done. However, our grandmother didn't have bright red curly hair like Ronald McDonald, and wasn't interested in finding a husband. Even children's books need humor and the Hamilton Kids' grandmother provides that and more, along with an adopted Australian Shepherd with a penchant for chewing furniture.
Writing for children has opened a new vista for me, which I hope my young readers will enjoy as much as I enjoyed the writing. I'm currently working on the second novel in the series, The Ghost of Crimson Dawn, which takes place here in Wyoming, where the Hamilton Kids visit their Uncle Harry at his mountaintop ranch. There's a bit of autobiographical plotting in that book as well.
The book is currently available on Kindle and will be released in print later this spring. The third novel in my Logan & Cafferty mystery/suspense novel, Murder on the Interstate, is also due for release any day and I'm also working on an historical novel, No Escape: The Sweetwater Tragedy.
My website: http://www.jeanhenrymead.com/
Blog sites: http://mysteriouspeople.blogspot.com/
http://murderousmusings.blogspot.com/
http://writersofthewest.blogspot.com/
Facebook-Jean Henry Mead
March 25, 2011
Do you feel bad or badly? Some more of my reference ...
Do you feel bad or badly?
Some more of my reference booksI think most of the confusion comes with describing how one feels. Try substituting a synonym or antonym, an –ly word for badly or an adjective for bad. If you mean condition (the adjective), an easy way to know is to substitute good for bad/badly. Here are some examples of the condition: He woke up feeling bad (good). He ate the leftover shrimp and woke up feeling badly/goodly. (Unlikely, unless food poisoning damaged his hands during the night.) But she felt
bad/badly
(
good/goodly
) about what she'd done. He felt bad the morning after the party. (He'd probably overindulged.)
My favorite reference bookBadly, the adv, modifies a verb, adj, or other adverb. Badly is seldom used with feel or felt. Badly tells how. If you're referring to how as in the tactile sense, try substituting clumsily or awkwardly. He felt
badly
(because his coordination was impaired). Because of the frostbite damage to his fingers, he felt badly; he was unable to tell skin from cloth. He played the piano badly these days. (It tells how he played) He felt clumsily or played awkwardly.
Felt badly is not common usage, at least not that I know of. It's almost always going to be felt bad . But maybe I'm missing something--feel free to say so.
With was, the correct word is much more obvious. His behavior was bad/badly (offensive or offensively?). Her grades were bad/badly. (Unacceptable/unacceptably?) He behaved bad/badly (offensive/offensively). This tells how he behaved.
You may think of other examples that are much clearer or uses I haven't thought of. Or some fun uses. Please! Let me know.
Next week I'll tackle lie, lay, lain. Won't that be fun?
Some more of my reference booksI think most of the confusion comes with describing how one feels. Try substituting a synonym or antonym, an –ly word for badly or an adjective for bad. If you mean condition (the adjective), an easy way to know is to substitute good for bad/badly. Here are some examples of the condition: He woke up feeling bad (good). He ate the leftover shrimp and woke up feeling badly/goodly. (Unlikely, unless food poisoning damaged his hands during the night.) But she felt
bad/badly
(
good/goodly
) about what she'd done. He felt bad the morning after the party. (He'd probably overindulged.) 
My favorite reference bookBadly, the adv, modifies a verb, adj, or other adverb. Badly is seldom used with feel or felt. Badly tells how. If you're referring to how as in the tactile sense, try substituting clumsily or awkwardly. He felt
badly
(because his coordination was impaired). Because of the frostbite damage to his fingers, he felt badly; he was unable to tell skin from cloth. He played the piano badly these days. (It tells how he played) He felt clumsily or played awkwardly. Felt badly is not common usage, at least not that I know of. It's almost always going to be felt bad . But maybe I'm missing something--feel free to say so.
With was, the correct word is much more obvious. His behavior was bad/badly (offensive or offensively?). Her grades were bad/badly. (Unacceptable/unacceptably?) He behaved bad/badly (offensive/offensively). This tells how he behaved.
You may think of other examples that are much clearer or uses I haven't thought of. Or some fun uses. Please! Let me know.
Next week I'll tackle lie, lay, lain. Won't that be fun?
March 21, 2011
Author Jackie Vick's Dark Secret
My guest today is Sisters in Crime member Jackie Vick, author of the novella The Grooms Cake, a romantic comedy, and two children's books. She has some humorous mysteries in the works too. Come say hello!I'm about to admit one of my darker secrets. Ready? Sometimes, I cram the laundry into the machine without going through the pockets. Don't worry. I pay for it, though the punishment doesn't come until I take the clothes out of the dryer. I'm one of those people who always carry tissues on me, just in case. It's a habit I picked up from my mother, though I don't tuck them into my shirt cuff. Often. I know that I've sinned against the cleaning gods when I see the first strip of tissue clinging to my sweat pants. Then another shows up on my husband's sock. Finally, I'm plucking stray pieces from the inside of shirts and the seams of my underwear, battling static cling and wondering how one little tissue wound up in so many places.The same thing happens when I jump into my story without plotting out the mystery. After typing THE END and allowing my masterpiece to rest, I'll pick it up a week later and expect to breeze through the final reading. But then the first piece of tissue shows up. Let's say I get to the chapter where the sleuth puts the pieces together. One character, Tiffany, has the opportunity to commit the crime, and she has a motive. She wants money. She pretends to be a plain, dorky girl, but she likes nice things. Very nice things. That's the motive I have in my head, but then I notice that I never showed that she has expensive tastes. We could assume that every girl likes gems, but unless I go back and have Tiffany accurately appraise another character's engagement ring or have her wear a Cartier watch that she allegedly "inherited from her grandmother", the reader won't know. Or I might have a short piece that takes place over one day, so I don't see a need for a timeline. Then I notice that my sleuth is eating dinner, but when I cut to the point of view of a suspect in the next scene, she's snacking on lunch. I have to go back through the whole thing and make sure the events take place in order--I have to pluck out the stray pieces of tissue.Outlining my mystery allows me to see what's happening and when. It's a way to make sure that the clues are spaced throughout the story and not lumped together at the beginning or in the end. If each question raised in the story is a tissue, the outline is my way of going through the pockets to make sure that I don't wind up with a mess at the end--in the case of my story, unanswered questions.
It's hard to believe that one forgotten detail like lunch or dinner can cause such problems, but as with that simple, aloe-enhanced square of fibers, the potential for mischief is incredible. Bio: Jacqueline Vick is the author of the children's book Logical Larry and a short story collection, A Mysterious Cast of Characters, soon to be released on Kindle. Her short fiction and articles--including an essay on how to train your dog using a pet psychic--have appeared in various magazines and ezines.You can visit Jackie at her website, http://www.jacquelinevick.com/ or check out her blog, http://www.jacquelinevick.com/blog.html
March 18, 2011
How do you get "in the mood"?
Music? A little visual stimulation? Maybe read something special? I do all of those and one big one. I'm a daydreamer. If I can find a quiet place, maybe with a warm breeze and the right scent, I drift off to a whole new world. I can work out a scene in my head much like watching a movie. But background helps, as long as it isn't words. The right music does put me in the mood. Jeff Bridges makes me happy. When he sings "I Don't Know," it makes me smile. Good for a happy scene, maybe where people are meeting. Then there's Mussorgsky's "Night on Bald Mountain" for the flight from danger. It changes the rhythm of the scene and the pace of my writing with it. Sometimes, for something sensual, there's "Sanctus" by Anúna or Carl Orff's Carmina Burana, or Debussy's "Afternoon of a Faun." Sometimes music is good for cooking too. Pavarotti for pasta, Dolly for chicken and dumplings, and Appalachian Spring for Thanksgiving. If you haven't tried some of these, you should. Music has charms, you know, and I'm convinced it enhances the flavor of the dish.
Let's not leave out the visual. I like to have pictures of my characters, their homes, the setting, their cars—I used to cut them out and pin them to a bulletin board by my computer, but now I have them in the computer and switch to them for a refresher now and then. This is the inspiration for Claire Spencer's shop in Cold Comfort. I have hundreds of pictures. I love looking at them.
How do you do it? What works for you? Is there anything special that helps put you in the mood? Do tell—you may help the rest of us.
March 14, 2011
What Makes a Writer a Writer?
I truly don't believe writers are made; they're born that way. I was making up complex stories and imagining all kinds of internal dialogue when I was ten years old. My mother was convinced I was a compulsive liar; my father held out for future fiction writer. Which just goes to show that Mother is NOT Always Right. Or maybe that Father Knows Best. I know: groan…Writers have one indisputable career responsibility: to get better and better. Writing classes can help, as can books on writing, but what really helps is―you guessed it―writing, writing, writing.
I've written nine novels now. Three have made it into print so far, with number four breathing hot down their well-bound necks. When I wrote my third novel―the first one published, I didn't know a genre from a genome. As a result, IF TRUTH BE TOLD is a mish-mash of genres: romance, suspense, women's fiction, and a classic coming of age story. I was lucky to find a publisher. The second, OF WORDS AND MUSIC is indisputably women's fiction. Then I stumbled on my genre of choice: MYSTERY!Writing LIVE Ringer (released 4/2010) was the most fun I've ever had out of bed. Writing mystery is even better than reading mystery because, although I'm not sure what's going to happen next, if I don't like the outcome, I can change it. Now that's power! I'd intended my first mystery, LIVE Ringer, to stand on its own merit, but there was so much more I wanted to do to the characters that I couldn't rest until I'd written LIVE Ammo, due out later this year. I'm currently working on LIVE in Person and have several more cooking in my mental oven.
The main character in the LIVE series is Allie Granger, a divorcee (her ex had the face of Adonis and the morals of an alley cat). She's an heiress (who knew her favorite aunt was wealthy?) and a reluctant investigative reporter. Allie spends much of her time in the sights of someone's weapon. Her best friend Sheryl is a sheriff's deputy―a sort of Sophia Loren meets Rambo―who is determined to protect Allie. Sometimes she even succeeds.Watching characters grow and evolve is what it's all about, at least to me. Allie starts the series an insecure albeit wealthy girl, but by book three, she's kicking butt and taking no nonsense. Does that mean it's a coming of age series? Not at all. We all have periods in our lives when we grow exponentially, when the curves life throws at us force us to reassess where we are and head us in different directions.
Isn't that what makes fiction―and life―endlessly interesting?―――――――――Lynda Fitzgerald is the multi-genre author of three published works, with her fourth due for release in late 2011. Visit her website http://www.fitzgeraldwrites.com. It's chock full of pictures and excerpts and videos of her books. And send her a message. She loves to hear from readers.
March 11, 2011
Past or Passed? Titled or Entitled?
Past is not, not, not a verb. It can be a noun, referring to some earlier or historical event or feature: In the past, we went visiting in a horse and buggy. Her past will be held against her in court.
Paul Newman, The Verdict An adverb (Past as an adverb explains where): We drove past the theater. An adjective: It's past history. In past cases, the lawyer performed admirably. The verb ran is past tense.
Here's the difference. If it's a verb, the word is passed. Ask if it shows movement. Substitute another verb and see if it still makes sense.We passed (substitute moved by) the courthouse. He passed (substitute threw) the ball. Time passed (substitute lapsed) slowly. She passed (substitute served) the potatoes. She passed away (substitute died) in the night.
A few others—entitled involves a right: You are entitled to a hearing.titled named: The book is titled Moby Dick.
few consisting of a small number: a few good womenless not as great in amount or quantity: less rain this year Wrong: Less people went to the fair this year Right: Fewer people went this year than last. majority greater number or part; something countable The majority live in apartments. The majority voted for it.
Wrong: The majority of the rain fell in November. The majority of the water spilled. Right: Most of the rain fell in November. More of the wine spilled than stayed in the glass.
compose to make up: the parts compose the whole. Nine planes composed the team.
Frecce tricolori, Italian military squadron team
© Leon Viticomprise to include, encompass; to consist of: the whole comprises the parts, The team comprised nine planes. You should be able to substitute include for comprise. Wrong: is comprised of . You cannot say The team is included of ten players.
Paul Newman, The Verdict An adverb (Past as an adverb explains where): We drove past the theater. An adjective: It's past history. In past cases, the lawyer performed admirably. The verb ran is past tense. Here's the difference. If it's a verb, the word is passed. Ask if it shows movement. Substitute another verb and see if it still makes sense.We passed (substitute moved by) the courthouse. He passed (substitute threw) the ball. Time passed (substitute lapsed) slowly. She passed (substitute served) the potatoes. She passed away (substitute died) in the night.
A few others—entitled involves a right: You are entitled to a hearing.titled named: The book is titled Moby Dick.
few consisting of a small number: a few good womenless not as great in amount or quantity: less rain this year Wrong: Less people went to the fair this year Right: Fewer people went this year than last. majority greater number or part; something countable The majority live in apartments. The majority voted for it.
Wrong: The majority of the rain fell in November. The majority of the water spilled. Right: Most of the rain fell in November. More of the wine spilled than stayed in the glass.
compose to make up: the parts compose the whole. Nine planes composed the team.
Frecce tricolori, Italian military squadron team© Leon Viticomprise to include, encompass; to consist of: the whole comprises the parts, The team comprised nine planes. You should be able to substitute include for comprise. Wrong: is comprised of . You cannot say The team is included of ten players.
March 7, 2011
Childhood Clues Set the Path for a Mystery Writer
Stacy Juba is the author of the mystery novels Twenty-Five Years Ago Today and Sink or Swim (Mainly Murder Press), as well as the patriotic children's picture book The Flag Keeper. Her young adult paranormal thriller Dark Before Dawn will be released by Mainly Murder Press in January 2012. She is a former journalist with more than a dozen writing awards to her credit.When I speak at schools about being an author, I always remind the children to pay attention to their favorite hobbies as they provide clues about what might make them happy as an adult. For example, a boy who loves to draw will probably still enjoy sketching as an adult - if he allows himself time to pursue it. Taking a half hour to draw after a long day of work might give him great relaxation. A girl who loves sports might grow up and do some coaching, or she may simply find that her stress subsides when she sits down to watch a big game on TV.
Sometimes, our childhood hobbies even turn into adult careers. I wrote my first story in third grade, and by fifth grade, I was winning writing contests and developing my own mystery series. Below is a short excerpt from one of my many childhood mystery stories, written when I was 11 years old, titled The Secret of the Sea Falcon:
It was a cool day in May. A young woman of about eighteen years of age was waiting on the docks of Newport Beach for her boating teacher, Candy.The girl's name was Leslie Parker. She was a tall willowy redhead with a peaches and cream complexion. Leslie stared into the sea green water. She knew she had a few days off from work owed her and was thinking of taking her first trip to New York.
Suddenly, she heard an ear piercing scream. It had come from Candy's boat, The Sea Falcon. Leslie raced toward it. Before entering, she pulled a gun out of her leather purse. Candy had given the pocketbook to her for Christmas some time ago. Leslie was a police rookie who worked for the Newport police force. Her father was the respected chief. Leslie cautiously pushed open the door to the boathouse where the Sea Falcon was kept. Candy was lying unconscious on the floor. Soon, a low, barely audible moan came from Leslie's friend. Her eyes then fluttered open.
Not bad for an 11-year-old, right? Funny, all my heroines back then had peaches and cream complexions, were 18 year old sleuths, and carried guns. Today, I'm writing about Cassidy Novak and Kris Langley - they don't have peaches and cream complexions, but I think Leslie Parker would have liked them anyway. If you'd like to check out much more recent excerpts, from my published novels Sink or Swim and Twenty-Five Years Ago Today, please visit these links: http://stacyjuba.com/blog/books-2/sink-or-swim/sink-or-swim-excerpt/ and http://stacyjuba.com/blog/books-2/twenty-five-years-ago-today/twenty-five-years-ago-today-excerpt/What hobbies did you enjoy as a child? Do you still make room for them in your life? Stacy is having a Buzz My Books Contest where she will be giving away a $10 Amazon Gift Card (2 if she reaches 500 blog followers during the promotion.) The link is at http://stacyjuba.com/blog/2011/02/25/enter-for-one-possibly-two-10-amazon-gift-cards-in-buzz-my-books-giveaway/ It is going on till March 19 and is open in the U.S. If you tweet Stacy's Unpredictable Muse post or share it on a site such as Facebook, head on over to Stacy's contest post and let her know in the comments that you shared her article from The Unpredictable Muse. She will give you an extra entry in the gift card contest for each share and you can also follow the instructions in her post for additional simple ways to gain entries.
March 4, 2011
Progressive isn't Passive
Not all uses of the verb be indicate passive voice. There's also progressive tense, which indicates that the action is ongoing.
Photo by Stuart Pilbrow
A progressive verb is some form of be with a present participle, the –ing version. It shows continuing action. Benny was hiding under the bed when the police arrived. This is an active sentence because the subject, Benny, was performing the action, hiding. Present tense is the same: Mary is going for help. Mary's performing the action. Don't you think there's a good case for using progressive tense? I do. It doesn't come up often and would be annoying if it did, at least to me. But I think there're times when it's the only thing to do. Examples, anyone?Passive, the one we try so hard to avoid, is when the subject is acted upon by something or someone else, or the subject receives the action. He was stabbed is passive. Someone else did the stabbing. The key is by. If the action is done by someone other than the subject, the sentence is passive. Passive is formed by adding a past participle to a form of be. The body was found by a girl and her dog. Aside from being weak, this seems clinical and removed from any emotion. If it's the first mention of the body, it destroys any impact the discovery might have made. Once the reader knows about the murder and has seen the body, the passive version could fit in dialogue: Hal repeated the story at the meeting. "The body was found by . . ." Hal's interest is in the body, not who found it.
Photo by Andrey Kiselev (minus bloodstains) Passive has its place. There are times, though rare, when passive voice works. The meeting was postponed, giving Olga time to hide the gun and change her blood-stained clothes. The meeting was postponed is passive, and it works here. We don't care who did the postponing; that's not what's important to the scene. What matters is that the postponement gave Olga time to do her thing. It could be made active: The committee postponed the meeting, giving Olga time to . . . To me this detracts from the focus on Olga. It's just more words that don't add anything. I seldom stick my neck out this far without checking. I looked up passive voice in The Chicago Manual of Style (my first choice in reference books). CMS says whether you choose active or passive may depend on whose experience you want to show. The man was caught by the police shows the man's POV, but The police caught the man shows the police POV. Okay, 'fess up. Do you ever deliberately use passive voice? Do you see a reason to? Ever? 
Photo by Stuart Pilbrow A progressive verb is some form of be with a present participle, the –ing version. It shows continuing action. Benny was hiding under the bed when the police arrived. This is an active sentence because the subject, Benny, was performing the action, hiding. Present tense is the same: Mary is going for help. Mary's performing the action. Don't you think there's a good case for using progressive tense? I do. It doesn't come up often and would be annoying if it did, at least to me. But I think there're times when it's the only thing to do. Examples, anyone?Passive, the one we try so hard to avoid, is when the subject is acted upon by something or someone else, or the subject receives the action. He was stabbed is passive. Someone else did the stabbing. The key is by. If the action is done by someone other than the subject, the sentence is passive. Passive is formed by adding a past participle to a form of be. The body was found by a girl and her dog. Aside from being weak, this seems clinical and removed from any emotion. If it's the first mention of the body, it destroys any impact the discovery might have made. Once the reader knows about the murder and has seen the body, the passive version could fit in dialogue: Hal repeated the story at the meeting. "The body was found by . . ." Hal's interest is in the body, not who found it.
Photo by Andrey Kiselev (minus bloodstains) Passive has its place. There are times, though rare, when passive voice works. The meeting was postponed, giving Olga time to hide the gun and change her blood-stained clothes. The meeting was postponed is passive, and it works here. We don't care who did the postponing; that's not what's important to the scene. What matters is that the postponement gave Olga time to do her thing. It could be made active: The committee postponed the meeting, giving Olga time to . . . To me this detracts from the focus on Olga. It's just more words that don't add anything. I seldom stick my neck out this far without checking. I looked up passive voice in The Chicago Manual of Style (my first choice in reference books). CMS says whether you choose active or passive may depend on whose experience you want to show. The man was caught by the police shows the man's POV, but The police caught the man shows the police POV. Okay, 'fess up. Do you ever deliberately use passive voice? Do you see a reason to? Ever?
March 1, 2011
The Past Has Long Arms
Please welcome my very first guest, author Donis Casey. She's giving away a book too.
I'm amused at how some people seem to think that whatever is going on this minute is unique in human history. Hardly! Even our modern technology is just a detail. People never change. They are us! They just didn't have cell phones. That's why I write a historical mystery series. As William Faulkner said, "The past isn't dead. The past isn't even past."My sleuth, Alafair Tucker, lives with her husband Shaw and their ten children on a prosperous farm outside of Boynton, Oklahoma, in the 1910s. She never sets out to solve murders, but all those pesky kids keep getting themselves into trouble, and need their mother to get them out. Fortunately for me, Alafair is the kind of woman who will do anything, legal or not, for her kids. Alafair is an homage to my foremothers, tough as nails and just as loving, who did whatever needed to be done, whether they were supposed to or not.
Crying Blood
is the fifth installment in my Alafair Tucker series. Alafair figures large in the story, but this time the mystery revolves around her husband, Shaw.It's the fall of 1915, and Shaw, his brother James, and their sons are on their annual quail-hunting trip, when his dog turns up a shallow grave and evidence of a long ago dastardly deed. Shaw finds himself faced with what seems to be the very real ghost of a murdered Indian who is looking for justice, or as the Muskogee Creeks say, "he's Crying Blood."
As Shaw discovers, the past has long arms.
I live in Arizona, 1200 miles away from Boynton. Both of my parents were raised in Boynton, and I spent a lot of time there in my childhood. My grandmother owned Mrs. Casey's Cafe on the main street for over fifty years.Boynton was quite the thriving community back in Alafair's time. It had two banks, five churches, a newspaper, a brick plant, an oil refinery, four general stores, two hardware houses, a furniture store, a farm implement store, and a big cotton gin. The 1916 Directory of Boynton states, "Altogether Boynton is one of the most progressive cities in the state, and its future is full of brilliant promise."It didn't quite turn out that way. The Great Depression did it in, like it did so many Oklahoma farming communities. When I write about the Boynton that Alafair Tucker and her family inhabit, I might as well be writing about Atlantis – a place that only exists now in the racial memory of its descendants. And yet I am who I am because of it.Read the first chapter of each novel on my website, www.doniscasey.com, I blog about writing at www.typem4murder.blogspot.com, and about food in mysteries at http://www.fatalfoodies.blogspot.com/.
Donis Casey is the author of five Alafair Tucker Mysteries,The Old Buzzard Had It Coming, Hornswoggled, The Drop Edge of Yonder, The Sky Took Him, and Crying Blood. Donis lives in Tempe, AZ, with her husband, poet Donald Koozer.Donis will send a signed copy of the original ARC to a name drawn at random from all who comment. This offer ends on Friday, March 4. But you must leave your email address for me to contact you. Write it this way--ellis at ellisvidler dot com--to defeat the trolls. 
I'm amused at how some people seem to think that whatever is going on this minute is unique in human history. Hardly! Even our modern technology is just a detail. People never change. They are us! They just didn't have cell phones. That's why I write a historical mystery series. As William Faulkner said, "The past isn't dead. The past isn't even past."My sleuth, Alafair Tucker, lives with her husband Shaw and their ten children on a prosperous farm outside of Boynton, Oklahoma, in the 1910s. She never sets out to solve murders, but all those pesky kids keep getting themselves into trouble, and need their mother to get them out. Fortunately for me, Alafair is the kind of woman who will do anything, legal or not, for her kids. Alafair is an homage to my foremothers, tough as nails and just as loving, who did whatever needed to be done, whether they were supposed to or not.
Crying Blood
is the fifth installment in my Alafair Tucker series. Alafair figures large in the story, but this time the mystery revolves around her husband, Shaw.It's the fall of 1915, and Shaw, his brother James, and their sons are on their annual quail-hunting trip, when his dog turns up a shallow grave and evidence of a long ago dastardly deed. Shaw finds himself faced with what seems to be the very real ghost of a murdered Indian who is looking for justice, or as the Muskogee Creeks say, "he's Crying Blood."
As Shaw discovers, the past has long arms.I live in Arizona, 1200 miles away from Boynton. Both of my parents were raised in Boynton, and I spent a lot of time there in my childhood. My grandmother owned Mrs. Casey's Cafe on the main street for over fifty years.Boynton was quite the thriving community back in Alafair's time. It had two banks, five churches, a newspaper, a brick plant, an oil refinery, four general stores, two hardware houses, a furniture store, a farm implement store, and a big cotton gin. The 1916 Directory of Boynton states, "Altogether Boynton is one of the most progressive cities in the state, and its future is full of brilliant promise."It didn't quite turn out that way. The Great Depression did it in, like it did so many Oklahoma farming communities. When I write about the Boynton that Alafair Tucker and her family inhabit, I might as well be writing about Atlantis – a place that only exists now in the racial memory of its descendants. And yet I am who I am because of it.Read the first chapter of each novel on my website, www.doniscasey.com, I blog about writing at www.typem4murder.blogspot.com, and about food in mysteries at http://www.fatalfoodies.blogspot.com/.
Donis Casey is the author of five Alafair Tucker Mysteries,The Old Buzzard Had It Coming, Hornswoggled, The Drop Edge of Yonder, The Sky Took Him, and Crying Blood. Donis lives in Tempe, AZ, with her husband, poet Donald Koozer.Donis will send a signed copy of the original ARC to a name drawn at random from all who comment. This offer ends on Friday, March 4. But you must leave your email address for me to contact you. Write it this way--ellis at ellisvidler dot com--to defeat the trolls.
