Nick Kolakowski's Blog, page 2

May 27, 2022

"Boise Longpig Hunting Club" is on sale for $0.99!

"Boise Longpig Hunting Club" remains a book I'm proud of. Writing it involved *a lot* of research, and I ended up talking to a number of bounty hunters and soldiers about their experiences in order to add a layer of realism to the whole endeavor. Plus, it involves a shootout in a clown-themed motel, and how can you go wrong with that?

Plus, readers seem to have responded to it. It remains a solid seller more than three years after it was released, those numbers encouraged me to write the sequel, "Rattlesnake Rodeo," which I also really like.

All this is a long-winded way of saying: Thank you. A solid reader response helps us writers feel a little less lonely as we peck away at our keyboards night after night. If you haven't yet experienced "Hunting Club," the Kindle version is on sale this week on Amazon for a mere $0.99 (it's also the same price on other platforms, such as B&N's Nook). Check it out!
 •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on May 27, 2022 07:37 Tags: boise-longpig-hunting-club, kindle, mystery, noir, novel, sale, thriller

March 23, 2022

'Payback Is Forever': Man vs. (Writing) Machine

When the pandemic started, I spent a lot of time playing around with a software platform called GPT-3, which generates text based on whatever you input into it; newspapers such as The Guardian have experimented with using GPT-3 to produce articles, for example. I uploaded ten years’ worth of my writing into the system, curious if it could imitate my style.

The answer to that question turned out to be “yes.” However, the output was also surreal, dreamlike; as it turned out, GPT-3 could mimic my writing style and word choice, but it had no idea how reality, physics, or human beings actually worked. The result was sentences like this:

“To the kid he was the fat man, sometimes acting like a moron in the heat of battle, blasting what appeared to be nails and a pumpkin at civilians, helping the dead back into the truck.”

Interesting, yes… but I don’t think any writer needs to fear for their job quite yet.

While I was playing around with GPT-3, I was also in the midst of writing a novella that was an homage to Richard Stark’s Parker novels. It was set in the 1960s and involved a master thief named Miller fighting to survive in the wake of a botched amusement park robbery. If you’re a crime-fiction fan, you’ve read that kind of tale before; the Parker novels have spawned hundreds of imitators. I struggled with how to give the proceedings a new twist.

You probably see where I’m going with this: I figured out how to blend my work with GPT-3 into the novella, which is titled “Payback Is Forever,” and comes out today from Shotgun Honey (paperback is available on your favorite bookselling sites and the Shotgun Honey website, while Kindle is via Amazon). It’s not the first book at least partially written with the assistance of an A.I.—almost forty years ago, William Chamberlain used a software program called RACTER to write “The Policeman’s Beard Is Half Constructed”—but I like to think I’ve stumbled on a particularly organic way to blend man and machine.

If you read it—and I sincerely hope you do—you’ll have to let me know which parts you think were written by me, and which were written by “synthetic me.”
 •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on March 23, 2022 10:36 Tags: amreading, book-release, crime, noir, payback-is-forever, writing

March 11, 2022

"Payback Is Forever" Is Almost Here!

It's no secret that I'm a huge, huge, huge fan of the Richard Stark novels, particularly his Parker series. For those unfamiliar, Parker is a master thief who meticulously plots his heists down to the last detail... which doesn't prevent them from going wrong in bloody, brutal, and occasionally hilarious ways. Much of the books' fun is seeing how Parker is going to get out of this one.

A couple years back, I decided to attempt an homage to Parker. The result: "Payback Is Forever", which is coming out March 25 from Shotgun Honey. It involves a master thief who, while trying to hide out in 1960s New York, finds himself ensnared in a plot involving Nazi gold, tiny assassins, and a long-lost painting. There are elements of David Lynch in there, as well.

If you want to pre-order the paperback, it's available on the Shotgun Honey website. The Kindle is available on Amazon. As we get closer to the release date, I'll add the usual links to Barnes & Noble and other booksellers. I think you'll dig this one!

Some early praise:

“Like a demented fun-house mirror version of a Richard Stark novel, Kolakowski deconstructs hoary crime cliches with the sort of panache you don’t want to miss. Our tour guide, Miller, is cut from the tough-guy mold, but twisted so askew by the end of the book, he’s carved out his own niche.”

-Brian Asman, author of Man, Fuck This House
 •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on March 11, 2022 11:00 Tags: crime-fiction, new-releasee, noir, thriller

December 16, 2021

"Love & Bullets" Excerpt and More

Hey all!

So "Love & Bullets: Megabomb Edition" has been out in the world for a little over two weeks. Thanks to everyone who's taken the plunge on it -- the early feedback has been intensely gratifying, given the amount of work involved. (It's also been pretty cool to see how folks react to the ton of added material and the adjusted ending.)

CrimeReads has a new excerpt from the book you can check out, featuring a nail-biting chase through Havana. Over at Criminal Element, I also have a long essay that (spoilers!) breaks down how and why I brought a crucial character back to life.

There have also been some cool reviews, including a lengthy one at Do Some Damage and a nice pop at Irresponsible Reader. If you've read "Love & Bullets," please feel free to leave a review on Amazon or here on Goodreads; it's enormously appreciated and helps get the word out.

If you're interested in grabbing a paperback or e-book of "Love & Bullets," you can head over to Amazon or the bookseller of your choice. I highly suggest buying enough copies to make a cool little holiday fort right in your living room.
 •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on December 16, 2021 09:35 Tags: new-release, noir, series, thrillers, trilogy

November 18, 2021

"Love & Bullets" About to Mega-Bomb!

My next book is coming out next week from Shotgun Honey, award-winning publisher of gonzo crime fiction! The mega-sized, all-extras-added, phone-book-thick "Love & Bullets" combines three original novellas ("A Brutal Bunch of Heartbroken Saps," "Slaughterhouse Blues," and "Main Bad Guy") with a whole mess of new material, including a new middle, the revival of a previously dead character, and an even more splattery/fiery ending!

If you're interested in snagging the paperback, head over to the Shotgun Honey website, which is handling paper pre-orders. E-book-wise, it's also available on Kindle (and more platforms soon).

Here's what some fine folks have been saying about "Love & Bullets" so far (more to come):

"Nick Kolakowski takes us on another incredibly visceral and vivacious ride among the lowlife and the lovers that populate his unique imagination. 'Love and Bullets' is vintage Nick: Funny, fast paced and just tinged with just enough darkness to make you afraid for his characters. Not to be missed!" - Shawn A. Cosby, New York Times bestselling author of RAZORBLADE TEARS and BLACKTOP WASTELAND

"It’s fitting that this darkly funny novel of criminals hunting criminals is dropping in the middle of the Great Resignation, a time when burnout–among other factors–is prompting many workers to give their notice or just walk out the door." - Small Press Picks

"The exploits of Bill and Fiona are long on banter and short on causation. This one’s for die-hard Kolakowski fans!" - Publishers Weekly

LoveandBulletsKolakowskicover
1 like ·   •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on November 18, 2021 11:24 Tags: crime-fiction, new-release, noir, thriller

October 14, 2021

'Absolute Unit' is on Sale!

Hey all!

"Absolute Unit," my heartwarming tale of a boy and his sentient, sarcastic, world-conquering parasite, is on sale on Kindle today for a mere $0.99! If you haven't picked up this horror-comedy yet, things get... weird. Splattery. And maybe life-affirming?

Here's what some fine folks and publications have said about "Absolute Unit" so far:

"[This] bizarro crime horror story is a friggin' blast, packed chock full of comedy, outrageousness, and violence."—Michael Patrick Hicks, author of The Resurrectionists

"...takes the basic concept of a thriller, dials up the body horror, and puts a blackly comedic twist on the whole thing, the end result being uniquely entertaining and gleefully bonkers."— Richard Martin, Horror Oasis

"Action-packed, gory, and hilarious. I loved it!"—Michelle Garza

"Absolute Unit is a kick in the groin to all those who hold "traditional values" dear. It is the American nightmare made flesh with all the hidden seediness and sordid behavior of a rotten and decayed culture placed front and center for your reading pleasure. It's a nasty, dirty read, and I couldn't put it down."—Rex Hurst, author of What Hell May Come

"The best parts of this book are the action sequences and the sharp wit laced throughout. Bill is not a great person and hearing from the perspective of the sentient parasite within him is truly unique. Once Trent gets involved, the story pivots and, while we still hear from the parasite, it is nice to have the added POV. 'Absolute Unit' speeds along and readers will be pleased with the entertainment factor."—Tracy Robinson, HorrorDNA

"With a plot like a hot-wired hot rod whose brakes have just failed, Absolute Unit will worm its way into your central nervous system just as effectively as its parasitic narrator, and the results will be equally catastrophic. High tension, humorous horror with a gloriously high body count." - Jasper Bark, author of Run to Ground
 •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on October 14, 2021 13:43 Tags: comedy, horror, noir, reviews, sci-fi, thrillers

August 3, 2021

'Absolute Unit' Is Out!

"Absolute Unit," my latest (and first!) noir-horror-comedy, came out last week from Crystal Lake Publishing! This book, written during the pandemic, is very close to my heart (and my liver, and my stomach, and my spleen). It's available on Amazon (Kindle and paperback) but wider distribution via other portals, bookstores, libraries, and audiobook is imminent. Nonetheless, if you're an Amazon user, I'd be in your debt if you'd order it from them -- early sales always help a lot of things.

Here's the plot: "Absolute Unit" is a dark carnival ride through the underside of the American Dream, where hustlers and parasites fight to survive against gun-toting furries, sarcastic drug kingpins, old ladies who are startlingly good with knives, and angry ex-girlfriends. It’s a hardboiled slice of modern American horror that asks the deepest question of all: Is the human race worth saving?

Bill is a nobody, a health inspector who’s not above taking a few dollars to overlook a restaurant’s mouse problem, and hated by nearly everyone except his long-suffering girlfriend. His nephew, Trent, isn’t much better: sexually and morally confused, he’s probably the worst teenage con artist on the East Coast. But today, these two losers are going to become the most important people in the world.

That’s because Bill and Trent harbor a sentient parasite with a sarcastic sense of humor and a ravenous appetite. As the parasite figures out how to control its new human hosts, the focus of its desires grows from delicious cheeseburgers and beer to something much darker and more dangerous.

We also have some neat-o blurbs rolling in (and many more to come):

"[This] bizarro crime horror story is a friggin' blast, packed chock full of comedy, outrageousness, and violence."—Michael Patrick Hicks, author of "The Resurrectionists"

"...takes the basic concept of a thriller, dials up the body horror, and puts a blackly comedic twist on the whole thing, the end result being uniquely entertaining and gleefully bonkers."— Richard Martin, Horror Oasis

"Action-packed, gory, and hilarious. I loved it!"—Michelle Garza

"Absolute Unit is a kick in the groin to all those who hold "traditional values" dear. It is the American nightmare made flesh with all the hidden seediness and sordid behavior of a rotten and decayed culture placed front and center for your reading pleasure. It's a nasty, dirty read, and I couldn't put it down."—Rex Hurst, author of "What Hell May Come"
 •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on August 03, 2021 14:52 Tags: horror, noir, reviews, sci-fi, thrillers

October 26, 2020

'Rattlesnake Rodeo,' the Fiery Sequel to 'Boise Longpig Hunting Club' Is Here!

We’re out in paperback, and on Kindle, Nook, Apple Books, and Google Books, although I’m always big on encouraging folks to buy indie. Here's the summary:

Three nights ago, Jake Halligan and his ultra-lethal sister Frankie were kidnapped by a sadistic billionaire with a vendetta against their family. That billionaire offered them a terrible deal: Spend the next 24 hours in the backwoods of Idaho, hunted by rich men with the latest in lethal weaponry. If Jake and Frankie survived, they'd go free; otherwise, nobody would ever find their bodies.

Jake and Frankie managed to escape that terrible game, but their problems are just beginning. They're broke, on the run, and hunted by every cop between Oregon and Montana. If they're going to make it through, they may need to strike a devil's bargain-and carry out a seemingly impossible crime.

Rattlesnake Rodeo is a neo-Western noir filled with incredible twists. If you want true justice against the greedy and powerful, sometimes you have no choice but to rely on the worst people...


Plus, we got some early reviews:

“Rattlesnake Rodeo is high-octane noir. A classic "man on the run" plot on steroids with enough artillery and action for readers looking for adrenaline rush, but with that dark, doomy core that is noir. While it's more fast-paced than Boise Longpig Hunting Club, which takes its time setting all the elements in place for a big finish, it shares the previous novel's emphasis on character and relationships.”
- Pulp Serenade

“This is a story to be consumed like vodka or tequila, in quick swallows that burn the back of your throat; this rattlesnake has a bite.”
- Crime Fiction Lover

“If you are looking for an adrenaline rush of a novel that presses the pedal all the way down, you owe it yourself to pick up Kolakowski’s latest.”
- Econoclash Review

"Nick Kolakowski is known for his insightful essays on complex social issues and controversies within the world of crime fiction but, for those unfamiliar with his fiction, Rattlesnake Rodeo (and its fantastic predecessor, Boise Longpig Hunting Club) are terrific starting points. At turns ruthless and intimate, but always with a touch of humor, Rodeo takes readers on a violent, memorable journey through the new American West and the dark violence plaguing his characters' souls."
- E.A. Aymar, author of The Unrepentant
1 like ·   •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on October 26, 2020 06:10 Tags: crime-fiction, new-release, noir, thriller

October 2, 2020

'Boise' for $0.99, Plus 'Rattlesnake' Upcoming!

If you've been meaning to read 'Boise Longpig Hunting Club,' my neo-noir Western (or maybe it's a neo-Western noir?) that landed some extremely solid reviews when it rolled out in 2018, Amazon is selling the Kindle edition for $0.99 for a limited time.

For those who've never been properly introduced to 'Longpig,' here's the summary for ya:

When you want someone found, you call bounty hunter Jake Halligan. He’s smart, tough, and best of all, careful on the job. But none of those skills seem to help him when a shadowy group starts taking his life apart piece by piece.

First Jake comes home to find a dead body in his gun safe. He thinks it’s a warning—and when you drag people back to jail for a living, the list of people who want to send that kind of message is very long indeed. With backup from his sister Frankie, an arms dealer and dapper criminal, Jake plunges into the Idaho underworld, confronting everyone from brutal Aryan assassins to cops who want his whole family in jail.

But as Jake soon discovers, those threats are small-time compared to the group that’s really after him. And nothing—not bounty hunting, not even all his years in Iraq—can prepare him for what’s coming next. Jake’s about to become a player in the most dangerous game ever invented…

Boise Longpig Hunting Club is a wild ride into the dark heart of the American dream, where even the most brutal desires can be fulfilled for a price, and nobody is safe from the rich and powerful.


Meanwhile, the sequel, 'Rattlesnake Rodeo,' is slated to drop from Down & Out Books on Oct. 26. I'm not going to post the summary here, just because it contains mild spoilers, but if such a thing doesn't bother you, you can head over to Amazon for the full description; it's also for sale via Barnes & Noble, your local favorite indie, and everywhere else. (Right now, you can pre-order various e-versions, but the paperback pre-orders should be imminent.)

Last but certainly not least, if you're in a podcast mood, I'm on the latest episode of the Reading and Writing podcast, discussing "Lockdown" (the charity anthology I co-edited for Polis Books) as well as the difficulties and unexpected upsides of writing and editing during a pandemic. Check it out!
 •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on October 02, 2020 10:49 Tags: crime, kindle, thriller, western

June 29, 2020

Some Good Early Reviews of 'Lockdown'

So Lockdown: Stories of Crime, Terror, and Hope During a Pandemic has been receiving some very solid reviews. Check 'em out!

Washington Independent Review of Books:

"Some readers might be put off by the idea of reading stories that seem taken directly from today’s news. It begs the question: Is it too soon to be writing about the lockdown, the virus, the ways they’re affecting lives on a daily basis, and how society may evolve afterward?

"Despite that sentiment, or maybe because of it, the featured authors went to great lengths to ensure that quality narratives are contained herein. It is worth reading and savoring these stories and — why not? — even fearing the possibility that some of them might come true."

Criminal Element:

"What I enjoyed most was the different takes on the pandemic. I appreciate authors dealing with pain through the lens of storytelling. There is something for every reader, south-western meth, semi-comedic NYC jailbreaks, dystopian horror, and even a bit of hope. The variety is remarkable.

"This is a fun read for a noble cause. A stellar group of authors came together, did a great thing, and put out a solid (if fishy) volume. You should buy a copy. You will enjoy it."

Book Reporter:

"The plots are ingenious, carefully constructed and extraordinarily attention-grabbing. A man so loves his sick wife that he will murder to save her; characters struggle through their own personal versions of a living hell in hopes of finding safety, only to ultimately find tragedy and destruction; lovers end up despising each other, and murder soon ensues; a man risks his life for an opportunity to view some powerful pornography; humans-turned-zombies attack and eat the flesh of their innocent uninfected victims.

"The editors wisely finish the collection with two stories that feature escapes to fantasy lands of beauty and love, though both, of course, also offer up gory diseases, horror and death. In these two pieces --- and only in these two --- can we vaguely glimpse glimmers of hope. I highly recommend LOCKDOWN for those with strong stomachs and an appreciation for imaginative literature. But if you usually read primarily for escape from your daily troubles, run away."

Sci-Fi and Scary:

"In 'Lockdown,' 19 of today’s finest suspense, horror, and crime writers explore how humanity reacts to the ultimate pandemic. From New York City to the Mexican border, from the Deep South to the misty shores of Seattle, their characters are fighting for survival against incredible odds. An anthology for our time, showing how the worst crises can lead to the best of us."

BOLO Books:

"In this anthology, a collection of excellent authors have written stories that highlight the challenges of lockdown during a major world pandemic. While not specifically about the Covid-19 pandemic, these tales will feel authentic to everyone as we all now understand what it means to face one of our most formidable enemies – an uncontrolled virus."
 •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on June 29, 2020 13:15 Tags: horror, noir, reviews, sci-fi, thrillers