Christopher Fowler's Blog, page 106

The Best Way To Read Is On A Toaster

The first electric toaster in the world was Scottish; it was invented by Alan Macmasters in Edinburgh in 1893. General Electric swiped the idea in 1909 and the thing went global. It became ubiquitous in kitchens (and remains so) because it can only do one thing. It cooks bread. A child can use it safely, […]

Careers In Word-Smashing 3: Pleasing Yourself

I don’t know of many writers who admit to being happy. The good ones are deeply critical of their own material; Alan Bennett seems perpetually amazed that anyone would want to read him, and many writers I know are looking to the next work to properly correct the mistakes they see in their last one. […]

Maggie’s Mind Lint 4

Time for another dip into the bran-tub of Maggie’s mind. This brings us up to date. For those of you who haven’t been following this, the eponymous white witch from my Bryant & May books is very much a real person and sends me immense texts that reveal the threshing machine of her thought processes. […]

Careers In Word Smashing Part II

I tend to look at all writing, whether fiction or non-fiction, novel, TV series, film and stage play, as stories. For me, a story must have enough structure and linearity to provide the reader/viewer with satisfaction. After that anything else can be added; thematic power, surreality, musical numbers, I don’t mind. You had me at […]

Why I’d Have Preferred A Southern European Childhood

1 Railway station destination boards have half a dozen countries on them. 2 Facial hair at 14 (Spain, Greece and Italy only). 3 Can sit outside for more than 20 minutes without having to go and dry off. 4 Emotional freedom; gesticulation, sweary gestures, shouting, slapping, kissing, public hugging, random protests, losing temper, generally being […]

Maggie’s Mind Lint 3

It’s been a while since we dipped back into the unhinged world of my dear friend Maggie Armitage and the stream of unconsciousness texts she sends me on a daily basis. Some of these are insightful. Some are simply as mad as an old man’s trousers. Maggie definitely invented the selfie years before anyone else […]

The Strange Story Of Keeping Calm & Carrying On

I’m in Barcelona listening to a Spanish song on the radio, which has as part of its chorus; ‘Keep Calm & Carry On’, such is the international fame of this simple little phrase. How on earth did it conquer Europe (and who knows, other parts of the world) so ubiquitously? It started out as a […]

Careers In Word-Smashing

What follows is my personal take on how writing as a career choice works; your experience may be different. Beware of the child who says they want to do ‘something creative’ when they enter the workforce. Creativity can appear in any job, but too often it’s used as shorthand for ‘I want to be around […]

Wedding Song Of The Week

Happy Royal Wedding Day…the sun is glorious, the pubs are covered in flags and the Windsor wedding has a gospel choir – what’s not to enjoy? To add to it, here’s Madeline Kahn, Stephen Sondheim, a live show, an impeccable performance, great lyrics (especially that list) and the final bouquet catch!

Unsentimental Sentiments: The Work Of Lissa Evans

The British don’t do warm writing. We are allergic to excessive displays of sentiment, a wartime hangover from not making a fuss and just getting on with it. We play things down. When a deranged neighbour firebombed her front garden, my old agent dismissed the incident by waving her hand and saying, ‘It merely singed […]