Gerry Alanguilan's Blog, page 13

Unusual Memory

It was very traumatic for me to leave San Pablo in 1978 to study in Manila. All my friends were in San Pablo and I was very attached to this place (I still am). We moved into this apartment near V. Mapa High School in San Miguel. It was no fun there. The landlords felt they were above us and their kid, who was around my age, didn’t want me playing with his toys. My dad remained in San Pablo for another year because it wasn’t so easy for him to transfer from the bank he was working on to another branch near us in Manila.

For that entire year we still went home to San Pablo on the weekend. I remember Fridays well because not only was I going back home, Voltes V would be on as soon as I got there. So weekends made me very excited and happy. But for the weekdays in that apartment, I felt very unhappy. Since there was only one parent with us there, I became very attached to my mom, who was by then working as a PE teacher in the College of the Holy Spirit. I had no friends and my brother, who was in his own world, and mom were pretty much it for me. I hated the hostility of our landlords and their son. I hated my classmates who made fun of my San Pablo accent.

One afternoon, I got worried when my mom didn’t return home at her usual time. After an hour more passed, I got so worried that I got a bit panicky and paranoid. I started crying. My brother was there, I don’t know, maybe he knew better than I did because he carried on whatever he was doing, probably pissed I was crying so much. I became so paranoid that I actually did feel I was going to lose my mom forever. I was inconsolable. I cried and I cried. I felt my world was collapsing all around me.

And then something really strange happened. I heard this voice in my head. I didn’t hear it with my ears. I heard it whispered inside my brain. It was a woman’s voice and it was a very beautiful and calm voice. It told me, and I can still remember this word for word right now as I type it, “Wag ka mag-alala, uuwi na ang mommy mo.” (Don’t worry, your mom’s coming home.) For some reason I trusted that voice, and I stopped crying at once. It was amazing. I immediately calmed down, and I actually started thinking of my school assignment. And yes, true enough, my mom was home some 10 minutes later.

Now I don’t know what that was. I don’t want conclude anything about it. I’m just writing it down as it happened. It’s one of the strongest memories of my childhood. I’ve never actually told anyone about this until now. I couldn’t forget how beautiful and calming that voice was. It was so powerful that had enormous impact on me that day, and it still continues to affect me today.

It’s opened up my mind you know, to be open to the possibilities. Was it all just in my mind? Possibly. Like I said, I don’t know what it is. Is it something else? I’m open to that being possible. But whatever the case, that voice helped me that day. And it’s a voice I will never forget. I’ve never heard it again since then. And I’m actually sad I don’t.

Turning a Corner

During the first couple of weeks of September I was flat on my back in bed with the flu. I’ve had the flu lots of times before during my life, so it was just one of those things that I had thought would come and go and be quickly forgotten. Life just moves on. I went back to my regular routine, and went back to work.

But something about those two weeks were different. It’s been a month since then, and I have noticed something noticeably different about me and about how I view things in my life. The other day I was watching Air Crash Investigation documentaries on You Tube. I’ve done this for years now because it keeps me awake as I work. I just avoid watching it immediately before I go on a plane ride because it does tend to make me paranoid.

But for the first time while watching it, I felt truly connected emotionally to the victims and their families. I don’t know why it happened, but it did. I see how survivors change, how their outlook on life changes, and how they found the courage and inspiration to strike out to do new things in their life, or perhaps pursue dreams they’ve always had.

I kept thinking why wait for something like that to happen to me before I do the things I’ve always wanted to do, say what I wanted to say? Those two weeks in bed made me realize that I won’t wait any longer. I think it’s time I found the courage to do some things I’ve always wanted to try doing. Things that might be crazy, things that might even be risky. I want to try to write things, other things that have always interested me but never really got around to it because my views may be controversial or be put up to ridicule. But haven’t I done that so many times before on this blog when it comes to comics?

Comics isn’t really my only interest. I’m interested in a lot of other things. Some things that might even be unusual or peculiar to some.

But I guess the time has come that I just really don’t care anymore. This is me, and these are my interests for better or for worse.

A Memory of Falling

Don’t ask me why, but it’s just one of those times I just suddenly remembered something from a long time ago, one of those times that I almost died. I must have been a really restless child. I suppose most children are. I figure I was around 7 or 8, and one of the things I loved doing was climbing. I climbed anything I could possibly climb. I climbed trees, fences, walls, clotheslines and that kind of thing. I never seem to learn my lesson because half of those times ended in disasters.

One particular time I climbed up our property wall, which was like maybe 6 or 7 feet high. It was an unfinished wall because reinforcing bars were sticking up in even intervals along the top of the wall. I walked along the top of this wall, balancing myself, careful to try and avoid the steel bars sticking out. Why did I do it? I guess for that age it was something I thought was thrilling and fun. I guess I just lost my head and didn’t mind the bars too much and I tripped over one. I could feel myself falling. My first instinct was to hold on to whatever I could hold on to, and at that moment it was the branch of a nearby papaya tree.

If you’ve ever seen a papaya tree, you would know how flimsy and weak those branches are. Imagine me grabbing onto one of the branches, and imagine that branch easily breaking off. That’s exactly what happened.

So there I was, some 6 feet off the ground, falling with a broken papaya branch held tightly in my hand.

The next thing I remember was me trying to get up. I remember being very disoriented, half conscious, unable to stand. I saw our laundry woman running towards me and then I blacked out.

Next thing I saw were lights and people hovering over me stitching something up in my head. I thought it must have been the hospital, and then I was out again.

I regained consciousness again at home, a big bandage was on my right eyebrow. I had hit the ground head first cutting my right eyebrow in half. You can still see the scar right now when you look at me.

That was only one of several accidents I’ve had with my head that required hospitalization. But none of them seemed quite as life threatening as that first one. I shudder to think of how it would be had I fallen even slightly different. I could have been paralyzed. I could have broken my neck and died.

But as I fell, I didn’t think about dying. Maybe I was just too young to think about those kinds of things. In fact, I know that what I must have been thinking was my parents are going to be so pissed that my dad was going to give me the belt when he came home that night. That was what I was thinking about.

I knew I would be all right later on.

A Black Day for Philippine Democracy (UPDATED)

Today, October 3, 2012, The Philippine Cybercrime Law of 2012 goes into effect.

The 1987 Constitution of the Republic of the Philippines

Article III: BILL OF RIGHTS

Section 4. No law shall be passed abridging the freedom of speech, of expression, or of the press, or the right of the people peaceably to assemble and petition the government for redress of grievances.

This past month has left me so speechless that I didn’t know what to say on this blog. It’s really so utterly and ridiculously overwhelming to the extreme. As an artist, this law has a long reaching effect on me and the way I wish to express myself in my art and my work. Indeed, this issue is probably the biggest danger to my identity and my freedom as an artist.

Allow me to say first that I believe there is need for a law like this. As a victim of cyber-bullying myself, I do clearly see the need for it. You guys have no idea the amount of hate that I get not only on this blog, but also on You Tube and on my personal email. Try uploading a video on You Tube. If it gets a moderately large amount of views, you will be witness to the most despicable, most hateful kind of human being on this earth. A Cybercrime Law is needed, but as it is now, it is grievously flawed and needs to be amended. AND QUICKLY.

I believe that this law, specifically the provision on libel, is a heavy handed approach to this problem. The most guilty of haters online, those who really strike below the belt are for the most part, anonymous. But of course, they’re cowards. They don’t want to be responsible for what they say so they HIDE. What use is the Cybercrime Law against people when you don’t even know who they are?

Those people who do put their real names out there, those who do stick out their necks and take responsibility for whatever they say are the ones who actually do have something legitimate to say, and they are the ones who will be hit the hardest.

Another aspect of this law that I find detestable is the provision on “cybersex”. What two or more consenting adults do in the privacy of their computers and homes is none of anyone’s and specially none of the government’s business. It is interesting that Senator Manny Villar is one of the signatories of this law, who previously tried to pass an Anti-Obscenity Law that tried to criminalize depiction of nudity “regardless of the author’s intent”. I wrote more about this here.

It is detestable that they treat adult Filipinos as children who cannot think for themselves and should have “moral guardians” like them. It is insulting, and it is degrading.

Because of this, I will not forget everyone who were part of making this law possible. The following individuals are as follows:

Sen. Ed Angara

Sen. Tito Sotto

Sen. Bong Revilla

Sen. Manny Villar

Sen. Lito Lapid

Sen. Koko Pimentel

Sen. Jinggoy Estrada

Sen. Loren Legarda

Sen. Chiz Escudero

Sen. Ping Lacson

Sen. Gringo Honasan

Sen. Pia Cayetano

Sen. Bongbong Marcos

Sen. Ralph Recto

I’m willing to give Chiz Escudero the benefit of the doubt for he admitted that the law was a mistake. What he does to rectify it remains to be seen. This is true for any other senator on this list who realizes the mistake they have made and take steps to rectify it. I’ll be waiting.

But as for the rest, I WILL NOT VOTE FOR YOU EVER AGAIN. Don’t you ever come to me, smiling, offering your hand to me asking for votes because you will not have it. YOU WILL NEVER HAVE IT.

FORBES.COM: The Philippines Passes a Cybercrime Prevention Act that Makes SOPA Look Reasonable

http://www.forbes.com/sites/insertcoin/2012/10/02/the-philippines-passes-the-cybercrime-prevention-act-that-makes-sopa-look-reasonable/

Fr. Joaquin G. Bernas S. J. Philippine Daily Inquirer: What’s frightening about the cybercrime law?

http://opinion.inquirer.net/37820/whats-frightening-about-the-cybercrime-law

Cybercrime, Data Privacy Acts a double blow on netizens-Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism (PCIJ)

http://pcij.org/blog/2012/09/28/cybercrime-data-privacy-acts-a-double-blow-for-netizens

ANALYSIS | The Cybercrime Law and how it affects your freedom of expression

http://www.interaksyon.com/infotech/analysis-the-cybercrime-law-and-how-it-affects-your-freedom-of-expression

Digital Martial Law: 10 scary things about the Cybercrime Prevention Act of 2012

http://www.gmanetwork.com/news/story/276434/scitech/socialmedia/digital-martial-law-10-scary-things-about-the-cybercrime-prevention-act-of-2012

Compelling Commentary on the issue, written by Yvette Tan

http://www.wheninmanila.com/cybercrime-law-limits-freedom-of-speech-and-sets-philippines-back-to-the-martial-law-years/#

UPDATE!

Apparently, Department of Justice Secretary Leila De Lima has stated that there’s ‘Nothing unconstitutional with Cybercrime Prevention Act’ in this news article from the Inquirer.

Well, the United Nations Commission on Human Rights apparently disagrees with her:

MANILA, Philippines – In a landmark decision just recently released, the United Nation Human Rights Commission says Philippine laws criminalizing libel is “incompatible with Article 19, paragraph three of the International Covenant on Civil Political Rights (ICCPR)”, or freedom of expression.

Read more here:

http://www.interaksyon.com/article/23051/unhrc-philippine-criminal-libel-law-violates-freedom-of-expression

A Black Day for Philippine Democracy

Today, October 3, 2012, The Philippine Cybercrime Law of 2012 goes into effect.

The 1987 Constitution of the Republic of the Philippines

Article III: BILL OF RIGHTS

Section 4. No law shall be passed abridging the freedom of speech, of expression, or of the press, or the right of the people peaceably to assemble and petition the government for redress of grievances.

This past month has left me so speechless that I didn’t know what to say on this blog. It’s really so utterly and ridiculously overwhelming to the extreme. As an artist, this law has a long reaching effect on me and the way I wish to express myself in my art and my work. Indeed, this issue is probably the biggest danger to my identity and my freedom as an artist.

Allow me to say first that I believe there is need for a law like this. As a victim of cyber-bullying myself, I do clearly see the need for it. You guys have no idea the amount of hate that I get not only on this blog, but also on You Tube and on my personal email. Try uploading a video on You Tube. If it gets a moderately large amount of views, you will be witness to the most despicable, most hateful kind of human being on this earth. A Cybercrime Law is needed, but as it is now, it is grievously flawed and needs to be amended. AND QUICKLY.

I believe that this law, specifically the provision on libel, is a heavy handed approach to this problem. The most guilty of haters online, those who really strike below the belt are for the most part, anonymous. But of course, they’re cowards. They don’t want to be responsible for what they say so they HIDE. What use is the Cybercrime Law against people when you don’t even know who they are?

Those people who do put their real names out there, those who do stick out their necks and take responsibility for whatever they say are the ones who actually do have something legitimate to say, and they are the ones who will be hit the hardest.

Another aspect of this law that I find detestable is the provision on “cybersex”. What two or more consenting adults do in the privacy of their computers and homes is none of anyone’s and specially none of the government’s business. It is interesting that Senator Manny Villar is one of the signatories of this law, who previously tried to pass an Anti-Obscenity Law that tried to criminalize depiction of nudity “regardless of the author’s intent”. I wrote more about this here.

It is detestable that they treat adult Filipinos as children who cannot think for themselves and should have “moral guardians” like them. It is insulting, and it is degrading.

Because of this, I will not forget everyone who were part of making this law possible. The following individuals are as follows:

Sen. Ed Angara

Sen. Tito Sotto

Sen. Bong Revilla

Sen. Manny Villar

Sen. Lito Lapid

Sen. Koko Pimentel

Sen. Jinggoy Estrada

Sen. Loren Legarda

Sen. Chiz Escudero

Sen. Ping Lacson

Sen. Gringo Honasan

Sen. Pia Cayetano

Sen. Bongbong Marcos

Sen. Ralph Recto

I’m willing to give Chiz Escudero the benefit of the doubt for he admitted that the law was a mistake. What he does to rectify it remains to be seen. This is true for any other senator on this list who realizes the mistake they have made and take steps to rectify it. I’ll be waiting.

But as for the rest, I WILL NOT VOTE FOR YOU EVER AGAIN. Don’t you ever come to me, smiling, offering your hand to me asking for votes because you will not have it. YOU WILL NEVER HAVE IT.

FORBES.COM: The Philippines Passes a Cybercrime Prevention Act that Makes SOPA Look Reasonable

http://www.forbes.com/sites/insertcoin/2012/10/02/the-philippines-passes-the-cybercrime-prevention-act-that-makes-sopa-look-reasonable/

Fr. Joaquin G. Bernas S. J. Philippine Daily Inquirer: What’s frightening about the cybercrime law?

http://opinion.inquirer.net/37820/whats-frightening-about-the-cybercrime-law

Cybercrime, Data Privacy Acts a double blow on netizens-Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism (PCIJ)

http://pcij.org/blog/2012/09/28/cybercrime-data-privacy-acts-a-double-blow-for-netizens

ANALYSIS | The Cybercrime Law and how it affects your freedom of expression

http://www.interaksyon.com/infotech/analysis-the-cybercrime-law-and-how-it-affects-your-freedom-of-expression

Digital Martial Law: 10 scary things about the Cybercrime Prevention Act of 2012

http://www.gmanetwork.com/news/story/276434/scitech/socialmedia/digital-martial-law-10-scary-things-about-the-cybercrime-prevention-act-of-2012

Compelling Commentary on the issue, written by Yvette Tan

http://www.wheninmanila.com/cybercrime-law-limits-freedom-of-speech-and-sets-philippines-back-to-the-martial-law-years/#

For Aspiring Comics Writers Looking for Artists

I’ve gotten quite a few emails from aspiring writers asking how can they either make their own comic books or how can they break into the comics industry. I’ve decided to write an article about it here because there’s plenty to say about the matter.

Breaking in as a writer in the industry is actually much much harder compared to breaking in as an artist. That’s because assessing the work of an artist is easier. Drawings are easier to judge if the artist is any good or not. In just a few seconds, you can already tell if the artist is any good or not. But a writer? You have to spend quite some time reading through a script, and not that many people would have the time and patience to do that. I don’t have the time to do that. Editors at conventions don’t have the time to do that.

The best thing for a writer to do is for them to team up with an artist, come up with their own comic book they would self publish or publish through an independent publisher. When that writer’s story comes out in comics form, everyone will know if he is any good or not. And if that comic book becomes successful, then more people will know that this writer is someone special.

This is how Budjette Tan got recognized as a good writer. He first teamed up with his friend Bow Guerrero on Flying Phantom, and his brother Brandie in 1994 to create Payaso, and published those stories out of his own pocket in Comics 101. It was a good first effort and it got him introduced as a writer. But it wasn’t until many years later when he wrote Trese, this time with another friend, Kajo Baldisimo, that he got a reputation for being an extraordinary writer. That first Trese issue was photocopied, paid for and distributed by Budjette himself. The title became so successful that it was picked up by book publisher Visprint a couple of years later.

That’s how it goes. It’s a ladder. You really have to start at the bottom of the steps and you slowly climb up. Whether you do this for fun, or as a hobboy or as a serious career choice, the process is the same.

My advice is for you to find a friend, preferably a good friend who will draw your story for you. Why a friend? Because a friend, a real friend is the only one who will invest the time and effort to draw your story for free. Drawing comics is no joke. An artist draws, on average, a page in 1-3 days. Let’s just say one page a day. If you write a 24 page story, that’s 24 straight days for an artist to draw it. If he is a young inexperienced artist, that might take much longer, even twice or three times as long. That’s one to three months you are asking this artist to work for free. Who in the world is going to do that for you if not a friend?

Another option is to find an artist and pay him to do it. That would make looking for an artist much easier. Just frequent comic book drawing forums online and interact. Sooner or later you will find an artist who will draw for you. Who knows, you might even find a like minded individual who might do this thing for free.

More often than not, aspiring writers writing to me wishes me to draw their stories. Now I’m glad to be considered, but it’s just not possible. Let me explain.

I’m currently working as an inker for Marvel Comics, working on Indestructible Hulk as Leinil Yu’s inker. Hulk has 20 pages a month. I finish one page a day. That means 20 of my days in a single month are already spoken for. The remaining 10 or so days I have I devote to creating my own projects. At the moment, it’s The Marvelous Adventures of the Amazing Doctor Rizal, and a few writing projects for other artists. In that small amount of time in a month to do my own thing, I would much prefer to draw my own stories. Because I myself have a lot of stories to tell.

Not many established artists will accept working with writers who have not yet proven that they can actually write comics. A lot of aspiring writers believe that they’re good, and for all we know they may well really be good. There’s really no way of knowing how good you are until you actually prove it. And once you’ve proven you are a good writer, it would be easier to find artists, even established ones, to work with you.

Right now, I’m sure plenty of artists would want to work with Budjette. But that reputation took years of hard work and proving that he is good and that he can do it.

Right now you’re starting from zero, but that’s where we all started once. You are where Budjette was in 1994. You are where I was in 1992. If you’re serious about being a writer, that road ahead is long and bumpy, I can promise you that. But I can further promise you this: If you are truly any good and if you work hard and persevere, I have no doubt you will be writing your own stories with the best artists in comics one day.

Good luck!

Indestructible Inks

I’m now currently working on the 2nd issue of The Indestructible Hulk as Leinil Francis Yu’s inker. I got terribly sick during work on the first issue, but I’m very glad I was given the opportunity to finish it. So right now I’m trying to catch up as a lot of pages of #2 need to be done. If I haven’t mentioned it before, I’m terribly happy to be part of the creation of this book as I’ve been a life long HULK fan.

And this particular series is special because it’s written by Mark Waid, who has recently been putting a less darker spin on superheroes, specially on his ultra successful take on the recent Daredevil. I just loved that series, and I’m loving it still. It’s so much fun to read. And if he brings those same sensibilities to Indestructible Hulk, I’m pretty sure it will be something very special.

For those who want to read this series, it all begins in November 2012, as part of Marvel Comics’ “Marvel Now” event.

There will be a signing/launching of this title at Comic Odyssey on November 24, 2012. This will be at their Robinson’s Galleria branch on the corner of Ortigas and Edsa. No details about the time yet, but I will be sure to post the poster of it when the date draws near.

I Lost Time

That as an intense two weeks.

I got back from Singapore two weeks ago, and although my trip was fantastic and I loved it, I got a very very nasty case of the flu immediately upon returning, and it put me down for the next two weeks. I feel bad for the time I lost, and I feel bad I was unable to enjoy sharing my experience with everybody at the time. By now STGCC may seem like old news if ever I decide to talk about it. But to me it almost seems like yesterday. But it wasn’t yesterday. It was two weeks ago, and those two weeks were a really bad time for me. In fact, I’m still recovering right now and my cough hasn’t really gone away.

I’ve not visited Facebook and Twitter or even answered emails too much. There really wasn’t much anything to say that wouldn’t sound miserable. I’ve also cancelled two appearances that was supposed to happen today, Saturday, and tomorrow, Sunday. But it can’t be helped. I would just be pretty useless as I’ll be just coughing all over the place.

What kind of stressed me out was being unable to work. I tried desperately to work on pages earlier on, and I just had to stop every few minutes so I can lie down. I was just too dizzy. But nevertheless, I was able to produce a couple of pages that looks as good as something I’ve done when I’m in tip top shape. I’m kind of proud of that. But it felt so horrible while I was doing it. I most likely won’t ever sell those pages because they’ve now indelibly become part of my memories. They’re some of the most valuable pages I have. Valuable only to me.

I think I’m about ready to start work again. I have around 6 days to finish this issue, which really won’t be a problem.

And when I’m done with the issue, I’ll probably start becoming active on Facebook and Twitter again. And I’ll probably post photos of my Singapore trip here.

It’s nice to be feeling better again.

At STGCC 2012

STGCC (Singapore Toys, Games and Comics Convention) 2012 is THIS WEEKEND, September 1-2, 2012 at the Marina Bay Sands in Singapore, and I’ll definitely be there!

I’ll be bringing copies of Elmer with me, as well as a bunch of original artworks from Avenging Spider-man, Ultimate Avengers, Superior and Supercrooks to sell. For the most part, I’ll be hanging out with the Komikon crew at their table, but this will be my schedule:

SATURDAY

12noon to 1:00pm Walk of Fame

4:30 to 5:30pm Panel

From scripts to pages. Drawing with regional comic artists.

Regional asian artists that are making waves in the western comics world.

What does it take it stand out from the rest? What are the tricks of the trade if any?

(Andie Tong, Leinil Yu, Gerry Alanguilan, Mark Torres, Chris Lie)

Moderated by HereBeGeeks.com

SUNDAY

1:00pm to 2:00pm Panel

Evolution of Heroes and Villians

How have they changed over the years? What influcences the change?

What’s the future for these heroes and villians? Any insider’s scoop?

(Andy Diggle, Mark Brooks, Andie Tong, Leinil Yu, Gerry Alanguilan & Mark Torres)

3:00pm-4:00pm Walk of Fame

Thanks very much to KOMIKON for making this trip for me possible. See you all there!

Vote for Your Favorite Books and Comics

The 2nd Filipino Reader Conference is going to be held on August 18, 2012 at the Filipinas Heritage Library in Makati. There is a Readers Choice Awards in conjunction with it, and ELMER is one of the nominees in the Comics/Graphic Novels Category. Included in this category are:

Angel Crush by Ace Vitangcol (2011, Alturia Hill)

Skyworld #3: Prodigal by Mervin Ignacio and Ian Sta. Maria (2011, Alamat)

Trese # 4: Last Seen After Midnight by Budjette Tan and KaJo Baldisimo (2011, Visprint)

High Society by Hannah Buena and Paolo Chikiamco (2011, Rocket Kapre and Flipside)

Love is in the Bag Volume 5 by Ace Vitangcol (2011, Alturia Hill)

Elmer by Gerry Alanguilan (2010, SLG Publishing)

Foldabots Chronicles Volume 1 by Jomike Tejido and Jill Arwen Posadas (2011, Jomike Tejido)

KikoMachine Komiks Blg6 by Manix Abera (2010, Visprint)

Weather-Weather Lang by Norby Ela (2010, NMN Creative)

It’s curious that the nominated edition is the SLG Edition, which is the American edition of book, usually sold outside the Philippines. The one mostly available here in the country is the Elmer 2nd Edition, published by National Book Store in 2011.

Anyway, those are the comic books that are nominated. Vote for whichever is your favorite! You can vote at an online ballot here.

For the rest of the nominees in other categories, click here.