Shanna Swendson's Blog, page 213

Christmas Disasters

My primary achievement yesterday was getting my Christmas tree up and the lights on. Still no ornaments, but it's a work in progress. I'm really shaking things up this year with my decor. Not only did I re-do the front-door wreath and change out the ribbon on the stair-rail garland, but I put the Christmas tree in a different place. It's always gone at the back of the living room, in the middle of the rear window, mostly because that's a fairly open space with easy access to a light socket, where it's visible from the dining room and living room. But this summer I moved my small stereo to the table that usually sits in that spot. I put it on a turntable so it can face either the living room or the kitchen/dining room, and I can hook my computer up to it to use it as speakers for iTunes. I couldn't figure out where I could move the stereo so I could still access it from the dining room and where I could also hook up the computer to it. So I got the grand idea of moving the end table next to the sofa and putting the tree in the corner between the sofa and the side window. It's minimal disruption of my usual layout, though putting the lights on when 3/4 of the tree is hard to access was a bit of a pain. If I do this again next year, I'll put on the lights and then move the tree into place.

I was doing all this rearranging and setting up while getting in the holiday spirit by watching my recording of Saturday night's SyFy Christmas disaster flick. The Lifetime holiday movies are cheesy fun. The SyFy holiday movies are awesomely awful, and this one, The 12 Disasters of Christmas, was epically awful.

Keep in mind that I am not making any of this up. It turns out that the Mayans were right about 12-21-12. Disasters will strike that could destroy the earth, and it happened before. The Mayans left information about this so it would be passed on throughout history and we'd be ready for it the next time. How did they do this? In the song "The Twelve Days of Christmas." There's a pseudoscience/magic explanation about geomatic -- or maybe geomagic, but I was pouring a cup of tea during this scene -- energy building up in the earth, and every 1,000 years it needs to be vented or terrible things will happen. For reasons that are never explained, the focus of all this is on a small town in what looks to be the Pacific Northwest, and the chosen one who can save us all is a whiny teenage girl (and what's the deal with these whiny teenage girls we're expected to believe will save us all? That's working so well on Revolution). The town comes under attack by terrible CGI, with the most awesome involving perfectly aimed ice missiles that impale and deflate all the inflatable lawn ornaments. Oddly, unless someone is being gored by an ice missile, all the disasters seem to kill by turning people to dust and disintegrating them, whether they're overcome by cold, fake lava, electricity or geysers. Our teenage heroine and her dad have to find the five gold rings before the world comes to an end -- and before the guy who wants to bring a Wal-Mart-type store to town (so you know he's evil) catches her and tries to sacrifice her because he saw one page in the Mayan 12 Days of Christmas book and leapt to that conclusion. I never did figure out how the 12 Days of Christmas mapped to the disasters. The only one they explained was that the twelve drummers drumming related to the twelve mountain peaks surrounding the town that were twelve (formerly) dormant volcanoes that were about to erupt with bad CGI lava.

Of course, the chosen one's name is J.C., and her parents are named Mary and Joseph, and the mayor who sells them out to the villain is named Jude, because subtlety is for weenies. The characters are too stupid to live at way too many points in the story. For instance, they're down to walkie-talkies as a form of communication, and everyone in town has them. So what do they do when on the run and checking in with the rest of the family? They give their location or destination over an open channel. It's just a "still alive" check-in, not a plan to meet up, so there's no reason to give their location other than idiot plotting (because otherwise, the bad guys might have had trouble finding them). Heck, even if they did need to give a location, if the odds are that the people who want to sacrifice your daughter are listening, you give it in a kind of private code, like "that place where we went that time." Unless, of course, they actually wanted to get rid of an entitled teenager. The smartest character in the entire movie was the family dog, who ran into the woods at the first hint of disaster and stayed there until the happy ending.

In summary, it was amazing. I'm not sure which was best, the inflatables being speared or the bad guy who got strangled with strands of Christmas lights that came flying off the eaves of a house. But I have decided that I could combine two of my career bucket list items and write a romantic comedy SyFy Christmas movie. The SyFy Christmas movies are too family-focused, with a nuclear family battling the disaster together. What we need are single people being thrown together by disaster and learning the "real" meaning of Christmas while falling in love in the midst of the disaster. One of them could be a Scrooge-like Christmas-hater who realizes during this crisis how precious life is and how important it is to buy gifts and put up decorations. Then the happy ending can be them kissing in front of the smoldering remains of their town in the aftermath as snow starts to fall and the surviving townspeople spontaneously burst into "Silent Night."

I must start writing this immediately.

Peace at Last

I made it through my crazy weekend, although on Sunday afternoon when I was lying with the covers pulled over my head, trying desperately but unsuccessfully to nap, I had a moment when I was tempted just to stay there instead of going back out for one last thing. I'm glad I did emerge from the cocoon, though, because the Sunday night concert was a lot of fun, and after that and a bit of Christmas light viewing, I'm finally starting to be kind of in the mood. I may even get my Christmas tree up tonight.

The kindergarteners did a great job Sunday morning with their tambouracas. Here's their performance (as recorded and posted by a mom). Warning: There may be unbearably high levels of extreme cute.



I'm the one in the bottom corner, sort of directing. No small children were harmed in the making of this video, though some might have been psychologically traumatized. One of them seemed to be trying to test me and got to two strikes in the warning about getting her tambouraca taken away, but then she seemed to have decided that I was serious and it wasn't worth the risk to test me to see if I'd really do it. Fortunately, she didn't have enough time to come up with a plan to get another kid to test me. For the record, I totally would have taken it away if she'd disobeyed or gone against directions one more time.

I also found a way to make them be quiet about anything. I tell them we're sneaking up on people. We made it from the choir room into the sanctuary, while carrying noisemakers, without the slightest sound. I wonder how many times that will work. I also wonder if I should be worried that telling them to be quiet out of courtesy doesn't work, but telling them they need to be quiet so they can sneak up on people is highly effective.

Those who are musically inclined may notice that there were a few music theory lessons fit in there -- finding the rhythm by measure and then by beat, even though the melody was syncopated, and then (mostly) hitting a beat when there was a vocal rest. At least one parent caught that and was impressed. She was also impressed that enough of them were actually more or less on the beat. Now I just have to come up with something to do next semester.

Today, I don't have to go anywhere or do anything, and it's a good thing because I put on the Comfy Socks and therefore am unable to leave the house. I hope to get some work done and then do some reading and relaxing.

The Crazy Christmas Weekend

I didn't quite get the Christmas decorations up yesterday. I got the stuff out of the garage, and I remade my wreath with the new things I got yesterday (it was starting to look a little ratty, so I spiffed it up a bit). But then I ended up making a library trip and then making some meringue mushrooms, and next thing I knew, the day was gone. Today I hope to get everything up, and I also have a lot of baking to do for the church cookie sale this weekend and to have things to bring to various events.

This will be my crazy weekend of the holiday season. Tomorrow afternoon, I have a meeting (it's of a social group, so it's more like a party), then there's a big party tomorrow night. My children's choir sings in the early service Sunday morning, and I sing in the late service with the chancel choir. That evening is the church/community Christmas concert. I may manage nine waking hours at home the entire weekend (less if I sneak in a nap on Sunday). Monday will be a day of collapse. It's supposed to be nice and cold, so that may be my curl up with a good book day. Then the rest of the holiday season until Christmas Eve will be relatively easy, and all the events and activities will be optional. Although I may be whimpering much of the weekend, I kind of like getting it out of the way like this. Then I can enjoy the rest of the season in something resembling peace.

I concluded my latest "portal book" binge this week with a re-read of Magic Kingdom for Sale -- Sold!. I must have read it in college because I have a paperback copy, and the publication date falls in that range. I didn't remember much of the book at all, so it was like reading a new book all over again. I'm not sure why I didn't pick up the rest of the series. It was probably the college thing. I didn't do a lot of leisure reading during those years. I suspect I also was less interested in a hero who was a 39-year-old widower than I am now. I could probably relate to him and his decisions better now than I could then. My library system appears to have the rest of the series, so I shall have to continue this time.

The initial set up may have been even more amusing for me now and at this time of year because the ad for a magical fantasy kingdom in a ritzy holiday catalog sounds a lot like something you'd see as the big item of the year in the Neiman Marcus Christmas catalog, something I wasn't aware existed the first time I read the book. Now I get all the local news stories every year about the outrageous things for sale to those who have the cash. I'm actually kind of surprised they haven't offered a kingdom yet.

What I like about this book is that the hero isn't any destined, chosen one. In fact, he's selected in part because they don't think he'll be successful. But he finds his inner strength and uses his skills, knowledge and experience to make something of what was supposed to be a disaster. It's the kind of person he is that matters, not any accident of birth or grand destiny.

Now for part one of the day's cookie frenzy.

Meet Scary Miss Shanna

I survived the last children's choir session of the year. Now we just have to get through singing in church Sunday morning. They did a great job practicing in the sanctuary, so I think they'll be fine. There's just one thing that worries me: they discovered the microphone.

When the children sing, they stand on the front steps with a microphone on a stand in front of them. It looks kind of like what you see in old-timey radio shows with the actors or singers grouped around the microphone, only without the call letters. The kids have pretty much ignored it before, but last night, they discovered that their voices really sounded loud if they got close to the microphone or talked or sang directly into it.

The reason this worries me is something that happened my first year of going to this church, before I was directing a choir. The preschool choir was singing, and one of the little boys discovered the microphone. He started singing more directly into it, so his voice rang out over the others. And then since everyone could hear him, he apparently decided it would be fun to say his favorite word really loud. Since this was a four-year-old boy, the word "Poop!" rang out loudly throughout the sanctuary. As a member of the audience, I found it hilarious. If I'd been the choir director, there might have been a dead child. I could imagine the mother crawling down the aisle on her elbows to get to him and yank him down.

So my kids got to meet Scary Miss Shanna last night. I usually try to keep a fun, friendly tone even when I'm scolding them, since this choir is mostly about getting kids to think of music as fun, but I let the serious edge come through when I let them know in no uncertain terms what I would do if anyone decided to have fun with that microphone (I didn't give details because I didn't want to give them ideas). I think I scared them a bit because once they saw that glimpse of my scary side (that can make grown men nervous), all I had to do after that was give them The Look and they backed off of whatever they were doing. Unfortunately, my biggest behavior problem wasn't there last night, so she won't have met Scary Miss Shanna. However, she also wasn't there for the discovery of the microphone, and she's one of the bigger kids, so I'll put her in the back row.

I did start instilling a little jazz appreciation by playing the Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack while we were passing out goodies and stickers at the end of class. I figure that's a good jazz gateway drug, since some of it may be familiar from TV (though there's a lot more to the soundtrack than you hear on TV).

Today I have baking to do and I think I may start my Christmas decorating. I got the supplies to re-do my wreath for the front door, and I'm going to make some changes to the garland on the balcony and stair railing. They played the Ella Fitzgerald version of "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" in the craft store (singing along was mandatory) and that's started to get me in the mood. Plus, they had Gluhwein at Kroger. That's a spiced German wine you serve warm at Christmas. I usually have to find it at specialty stores, so I was surprised to find it in the neighborhood grocery store. I was very happy. I imagine I'll be even happier later tonight when I kick back with a mug of it while admiring my Christmas decor.

Productivity and Procrastination

Tonight is my last children's choir class until the new year, and while I love the kids dearly, this comes with great relief. I don't even have to do serious lesson plans for tonight because we're mostly rehearsing for our song on Sunday morning, and then since one of the preschool choir teachers is going to be out, we're combining classes and will just do a Christmas carol singalong. I figure the kids are going to be wired and hyper anyway, and since it will be nearly a month before we meet again, there's no point in starting something new or really teaching anything. Spending the last half of class just singing should be the best option.

I've talked myself out of today's errands because I think I have enough going on that I don't need to stress myself out further. I didn't get much accomplished yesterday, aside from some housework and bookkeeping. I don't even know where the day went.

And that meant I read with great interest a couple of articles from Lifehacker on productivity that started going around my friends on Facebook. I'm always looking for new ways to make myself more productive, even if I know that number one on the list would be getting off the Internet and working. My most productive day ever was the day my ISP had a national outage. I guess what I need is tips and tricks for making myself get off the Internet and work.

So, first, I was rather reassured by the article about how many of the productivity "givens" turn out to be untrue. I particularly like the one about how getting up early doesn't necessarily make you any more productive, unless you're a morning person. There's a weird societal pressure about mornings that I don't get even if I find myself acting according to it. Some of my most productive writing ever comes when I do late-night marathons -- make a pot of tea and sit down to write starting around 8 or 9 and then write until past midnight. There are no distractions then -- nothing on TV, nothing new being posted to any Internet discussions I have going on -- and I can lose myself in a book. I used to do that on Friday nights back when I had a regular job and was writing in my spare time. I caught myself thinking the other day that I ought to do that in January, since Haven will be over for the season and Grimm won't be back until February or March, so my Fridays will be open for a while. And then I had the forehead-slapping "duh!" moment of realizing that the reason I had to do that on Fridays back then was that on weekdays I had to get up and go to work in the morning. Now, the writing is my work. There's generally no reason why I can't do late-night marathons almost any night. And yet I feel guilty for sleeping until ten on a weekday, even if I was up until past one writing eight thousand words. Getting that one productivity myth out of my head would probably improve my productivity dramatically because it would allow me to work in the way that best suits me. I accomplish more of the work that matters to me by working late and sleeping late, so I shouldn't feel guilty. A mix of schedule is probably best, since on days when I have business-type work to do, I get more done if I get an early start on the day.

Which brings up the next interesting article, on creating your own productivity style by mixing items from various methods. I think I've tried all of the methods they list, with varying degrees of success. Some things stuck. Some didn't. I tried the 43 folders thing, but it seems I don't have enough going on to require that much of a futures file, so it never became a habit. Maybe I should re-do it to only have the monthly folders and then maybe an early-month and mid-month folder. I tried the break it down into lists and keep it all in a notebook thing, and that was moderately successful. The problem with applying it to my work is that my to-do list often involves something like "write a novel." Breaking it down may mean "write a chapter," but it's hard to even plan that much because it depends on how the work goes. That led to my current stopwatch routine because I can track how much time I actually spend writing. I set up some incentives when I reached certain milestones, except I never actually carry through on the incentives, so I'm not sure how effective that is.

Really, procrastination is my biggest problem. I'll even put off the things I want to do (like all my incentives for working a certain amount of time). Once I get started, I'm fine. It can just take me hours to get started. That may be why the late-night marathons work for me -- all the excuses are gone and there's nothing left to do but write, and once I've started, I can keep going.

This is one thing I'll have to get better at. When I was writing for a publisher that wanted one book a year, there was no point in killing myself. If I end up going more the independent route, you get success there with volume and frequency, plus you have to juggle the business side of things and my usual all-or-nothing habit when I'm writing won't work. I'm still working on developing the perfect productivity system for myself. Letting people be wrong on the Internet without pointing out the error of their ways might be a good start.

The Elixir of Life

I think I've solved the main problems I need to fix in revising the current project. Now I just need to see about implementation. Mindless busy work seems to be the key. I spent some time yesterday afternoon listening to this book's "soundtrack" while washing dishes and sorting through the mail pile, and that seems to have unlocked something. I may uncover the secrets of the universe by just cleaning my whole house.

Or I could just drink tea. There was an article in the newspaper this morning (that I found online) about the health benefits of tea. One of the benefits is that it "improves cognitive function" by improving blood flow to the brain. So there's a good reason for me to brew a pot of tea for my writing sessions. It really is the elixir of life.

I've developed a minor new TV addiction that's rather out of character for me. I saw a post online somewhere about a new show on TBS called Wedding Band, about a band that plays for weddings and special events, and the post mentioned some unusual arrangements of songs. I'm a sucker for odd remixes of familiar things, so I checked it out OnDemand, and have found it rather hilarious, even if it's raunchier than I tend to like. What I do like is the music. This band adapts itself to the theme of the wedding or event, so they may do stuff like play a Renaissance-sounding version of "YMCA" at a fantasy-themed wedding held at a science fiction convention. Or they did a rather good version of "Don't You Forget About Me" at a funeral. The plots do tend to center on the arrested development overgrown manchild theme, since all these adults are still trying to live their rock star dreams, with only one of them being married with kids and a "real" career, but there is a rather endearing sweetness underlying it all with the joy of being in a band and with their friendships with each other. There are a number of geeky in jokes, and for more geekiness, you get to see what might happen if Derek Reese from the Terminator TV series, Walt's dad from Lost and the freakishly tall psychologist from NCIS: Los Angeles had a band. Supposedly, the actors are all actually playing the instruments and singing (I looked it up, and in the behind-the-scenes material they talk about their musical backgrounds and how they actually do rehearse together as a band) and I haven't detected any obvious signs of AutoTuning (they sound like real people singing, not robots, unlike much of the cast of Glee). So, if you like playing "name that tune" or seeing what might happen at a redneck-themed wedding held at a country club, it's surprisingly addicting. It's becoming what I pull up OnDemand when I need a good laugh.

And now, I have business stuff to attend to, like bookkeeping and nagging people for information, before I can get to work on revisions.

Having a Plan B

I had planned to put up my Christmas decorations today, but it was 83 degrees yesterday, and today is looking to be about the same, and I'm just not in the mood, in spite of watching my first bad Christmas TV movie of the year last night. I may do the pre-Christmas house cleaning, and then maybe I'll take a stab at decorating on Friday. I'm kind of in a work mood today.

I had a meeting with my agent on Saturday (over margaritas on an outdoor balcony, which is a great way to discuss business), and now I have my plan for the next few months. While I do prefer to just hand a book over to a publisher, as long as the publishers are being weird, it's nice to have a Plan B option. Once upon a time, it was a waste of time to write a sequel for a book that hadn't sold yet. Now, though, not selling (particularly when the rejections are all along the lines of "I love this book, but I don't know how we'd publish it) isn't the end of the line. When the rejections aren't about the book but are about their perceptions of the market, and when what I hear from actual readers is that there is a market for this book, then if they don't want it, I can still get it out there, and in that case, I may as well start on the sequel. If the first one sells, then I'll have a sequel ready. If it doesn't, then I'll have the series ready to e-publish.

This month, I'll be revising a book we discussed (and I think I solved the big problem while I was driving home), but it's not a huge rush because there's no need to get it back to my agent before the holidays. Then I'll do final tweaks on Book 7 after my agent looks at it. And then I'll get to write book two in my planned fantasy steampunk trilogy.

There are some other things possibly in the works involving the Enchanted, Inc. series, including getting book 7 out in the US, working on digital English-language releases of the first four books outside North America, and maybe even an audiobook, but those are mostly still in discussing stages.

But while I'm not feeling very Christmassy this week, I think I'll buckle down and work, and then when the spirit strikes me, I can relax and enjoy myself.

The Curse of the Comfy Socks

I made a major tactical error this morning. When I was at Target yesterday, they had the fuzzy comfy socks that kind of work like slippers on clearance. I couldn't resist. And then I put a pair on this morning. I have a few errands I really should run, and these aren't really the kind of socks you can wear with shoes, but I don't want to take them off and put on "real" socks, so I may not be able to leave the house today. Fortunately, I have work involving reading and writing that is even more important than any errands, so I don't feel too guilty. Seriously, these socks are dangerous. And I got two pairs for $2.50! About the only thing that may lure me out of the house is a trip to Target to get more of them. And then I wouldn't leave the house all winter.

I'm still in love with this book of mine I'm re-reading. I generally think of myself as more of a storyteller than a writer. I don't worry that much about the individual words, as long as they convey the story I'm trying to tell. When my agent and I started discussing whether this book would have a better chance as women's fiction or fantasy, I said I didn't think the writing was at the level it would need to be for women's fiction, but now that I'm re-reading it, I think I may have been selling myself short. But I don't think it's the same kind of writing you tend to get with those quasi-literary book club-bait books. I don't use a lot of metaphor and imagery. My writing is generally pretty concise, and with this book it's really punchy -- like I said, it has that screwball comedy rhythm. I'm proud of this writing, but I still don't think this book is good book club bait.

I would say that maybe my best bet for success is to write the whole series, then self-publish so that a book a month comes out, with a low enough price point for the first book that it can get a lot of buzz. Then that may bring me to the attention of the conventional publishers. But I have to say that I'm not that crazy about the self-publishing process. It's a lot of work, even when I've got a lot of people working with me to handle it. I'm not as big a control freak as I thought I was because I'm much happier handing a book over to a publisher and letting them do their thing, with me then just having to say yay or nay on a few decisions. Just hiding in my cave (in my comfy socks) and writing is pretty much my ideal career plan. But that's not the way the world works these days. The books I've self published have been reasonably successful, but they're later books in a series where a publisher controls the first four, so I don't think it has quite the same impact as starting a series that way.

From my observations of the market, it seems like a lot of the success comes either in the super-sexy books (many of which are repurposed fan fiction) or in the kinds of books traditional publishers are ignoring these days, which includes chick lit and some of the sweeter romances. That may be the only way to get traction with my not really any particular genre books, though I think we'll still try hitting the publishers before going to plan B, since I'd prefer for other people to do the work, get books in stores, etc.

Between the Niches

I experienced a Christmas miracle last night. My choir kids were quiet and relatively peaceful! I had a couple of kids who were out the last time and didn't get a chance to make their tambouracas, so I had some I'd put together and gave them to those kids to color. Then the others wanted to do more work on theirs, so I passed them out. For fifteen whole minutes, they were almost utterly silent as they worked. Since those kids being quiet -- and where I could see them, so I knew they weren't building atomic bombs or tying each other to railroad tracks -- is such a rare and wonderful thing, I just let it go until they started getting restless. They also picked up the rhythms and how to play for the song we're doing. I now have high hopes for next semester. I may be able to get into more music theory and actual teaching if I don't have to do so much lion taming.

I'm re-reading a book prior to discussing it with my agent, and I've fallen in love with it all over again. I admit that there are some plot things that need to be fixed, but I really love the writing, and I seldom can say that about my own work. I usually always want to tinker with it. This book just gives me a silly grin. That makes me want to do whatever it takes to get it into the shape it deserves to be in. While my agent has said she loves it, too, she's already concerned about it being difficult to sell because it doesn't really fit into any of the niches. The romantic elements are too light (and with no sex) for it to be paranormal romance. It's not really "literary" or emotional enough to be fantasy women's fiction, and the fantasy elements are too overt (the women's fiction stuff tends to lead toward magical realism). It's not dark and heavy enough for fantasy. It's sort of a fantasy screwball comedy -- something you could imagine Jimmy Stewart or Cary Grant and Irene Dunne or Barbara Stanwyck starring in.

Someday I'll have to try writing something that clearly and obviously fits within the established -- and currently popular -- parameters of a particular genre, so that it will be painfully obvious exactly where to market it and the editors won't be saying stuff like "but we don't know how to position this" or "we've never published anything like this before." But where's the fun in that?

Revision: The Details

We had a substitute teacher in dance last night who's a former professional ballerina. Class was a wee bit more challenging, not so much physically as mentally because it was so different. I also had more proof that I'm very much a verbal learner. She demonstrated what to do without talking through it, and without the words I had a hard time figuring it out and retaining the information. Then by the end of the class, I was so tired I went into total klutz mode where I couldn't get my arms and legs to cooperate. It was like they were being controlled by someone else entirely. Now I know what it's like to be a marionette. One with an incompetent handler.

This is going to be my last writing post of the year. I'm taking a little time off from this because of a killer combination of writing work and holiday crazies, but I'll be back in the new year.

I'm wrapping up the discussion of revisions. Once you've got the big-picture story worked out and the scenes flowing, it's time to mess with the words. This may take more than one pass -- one for wordsmithing and one for proofreading. Once you get good at this, you might be able to do both at once, but for a first book, I'd recommend doing it separately because you need to proofread your wordsmithing.

It helps at this stage to change the way you see the book. Change the font or print it out. That way, you're more likely to see what's really there instead of what you're used to seeing after so many drafts. It needs to look like a different book to you. I also like to read it out loud in this phase. Not only does that force you to read every word, so you can spot more errors, but that tells you if the language is flowing or if it's awkward. You'll also get a sense of whether the dialogue sounds like real people talking and if the dialogue fits the characters' voices.

Some things to look for:
Do you have pet words that you use a lot? If you're paying attention, this will become painfully obvious. If it's a less obtrusive workhorse kind of word, you might be able to get away with it several times on each page, but if it's a more obvious word, you'll want to limit it to a few times per book. I remember one book where I described way too many things as "ornate." That had to be changed. This is where you can make your writing more precise. That pet word may be a stand-in that comes up when you don't know how else to describe something. Try to come up with a mental image of what you're talking about in the story and describe it to yourself, then see if that gives you an idea of a more precise word to convey that image.

Are you using the strongest possible verbs? If you find yourself adding adverbs to make the picture clearer, you might need to search for the right verb. "Ambled" or "trudged" instead of "walked slowly," for example.

Do you have a lot of wasteful words? This often comes up in verb construction, where it's easy to get into "was" forms, as well as "tried to" or "started to." In some instances, those are accurate and should be used. In others, you can cut them and just go with the standalone verb form. Try cutting the helper words and see if it changes the meaning. For instance, if your sentence is something like, "When he saw her enter, he started to stand, but she waved him back to his seat," then you need the "started" because he doesn't complete the motion. But if it's more like, "I was starting to feel hungry," you might be able to just say, "I was hungry," depending on the circumstances. Other wasteful words are what one of my journalism professors called "weasel words," which are words you use to avoid committing to an absolute -- like "sort of," "kind of" or "almost." Again, does it change the meaning to remove them? If not, cut them. There's more leeway in dialogue because the weasel words might be a character trait, but you still don't want to overdo it.

Is there variety in your sentence pattern? A lot of standard subject/verb sentences can have a machine gun effect, which is useful for action sequences or building tension but which gets boring and repetitive in slower passages. Mix things up a little, if you can. This is where reading aloud really helps because it showcases any sing-songy patterns that come up. You should also find yourself speeding up for more intense action scenes and slowing down for more contemplative passages. If you don't, you'll need to fix your sentence structure and length to provide the right pacing. Make sure the dialogue sounds like something human beings would say so that it doesn't come across as stilted. Sentences in dialogue should be short enough for you to say them in one breath. Most people generally don't talk in paragraphs, so break up blocks of dialogue.

And always be looking for opportunities to be more precise, more concise and more fluid -- but all while retaining your own voice. You don't want to edit the life out of your work and not make it sound like yourself.