Michael Offutt's Blog, page 170

Truth has no agenda

I saw a movie about six months ago called The Invention of Lying, and although it was funny, I kinda wished that I lived in that world. For those of you that haven't seen it, the movie is about an Earth where lying has never been invented. People just tell the truth all the time.  In answer to questions like, "How are you?" The main character gets responses like, "I'm terrible and have come up with a plan to commit suicide tonight in my apartment if I have the guts to do it. I'm a terrible coward."  The response being, "Oh well best of luck then."

I just think people lie way too much. They lie to avoid embarrassment, they lie to avoid punishment, and they lie to prevent hurt feelings.  Sure, I know the reasons of why people lie. I just wish it wasn't that way, and honestly I think the truth makes the world a better place.

Recently, a friend told me a story. She is a Hispanic American whose first husband was a black man. As a result, her beautiful daughter had natural dark skin. She took her daughter to a daycare here in Utah and after work, went to pick her up. The lady at the daycare said, "Please don't bring back your child. I cannot care for your child. You need to find another daycare."

She asked, "Why? Was she bad?"

The lady responded, "No. She's black. I will not care for a black child."

Instead of getting angry, my friend responded as I would have responded.  "Thank you. Thank you for admitting that you're a racist bigot. I will find another daycare for my child. I honestly am thanking you because had you not said something, you could have harmed my child. I'm glad it never came to that."

And she promptly went in search of another daycare asking questions like "Are you okay with the fact that my daughter has very dark skin?"

As a man with mixed ancestry myself, I understand perfectly how even though it is 2011, when you don't look a certain way or act a certain way you will be discriminated against. I appreciate truth.

More examples from life. Wouldn't it be better if people were honest in their interactions with others?

Take Sandusky of the Penn State scandal. If he had the guts, he should have just come out thirty years ago and said, "I like to screw boys. I'm a pedophile." Then maybe he could have moved to Thailand or some other place that doesn't prosecute pedophilia and not be in the trouble that he is in. At least boys would have been protected, and he could have claimed to be a part of the human race by outing himself as a monster. As is, he's more slug than human.

People who don't believe in God or the teachings of a religion yet remain within the ranks of a religion giving tithe simply because they don't want to lose friends or shatter the lives of their families. This is living a lie. And it gives strength to a religion (and their agenda) because you support them with your cash. I manage to eek out an okay existence by being an "out" atheist. I have no family and kids and play a lot of video games and read books. I wish it were different, but at least I don't lie. Lying is for cowards.

How about going up for a promotion at work? Here's the situation. You have more experience than the other guy. You have more education. Yet the other guy gets the job. Wouldn't it be nice if the boss just said, "Hey, the other guy is more attractive and even though he's married, I'm hoping I can screw him once or twice despite the fact that he's married." Don't laugh...I've actually seen this happen. I no longer work there...but yeah...I saw exactly that. Being the guy that didn't get the job, I would have liked to have had the truth. I could have quit sooner.

How about people who follow you in social media exclusively because they want to sell you their stuff?  The lie is that they are interested in you.  The truth is that they have no intention of ever actually being interested in you. They just want your money. Wouldn't it be nice to hear the truth?

Another example: a man I once knew gives his wife a doughnut every day after working midnight's. He knows that the wife has been trying to lose weight but says, "She loves the fresh doughnuts. It's a way I show that I care." The truth is more sinister: "I'm an insecure man and think my wife will leave me for another man if I don't fatten her up and make her feel ugly." I've seen this in action...it really did happen. I called the guy on his bullshit, and he 'fessed up to it.

A person says, "I will read your book." The truth is they have no intention of doing this. Just be honest. "I don't read and won't buy a copy of your book." I'd be fine with that and would say, "Thank you. I never expected your support anyway. It's not like we exchange Christmas cards."

A person gets to be friends with you so that they can befriend a friend of yours that they want to have sex with.  Just be honest, "I find this person attractive and want to warm up to you so that the other person will like me and we can screw. But I really have no intention of being your friend and would prefer if you dropped off the face of the earth once I get what I want."

I like truth. I rarely get upset at truth. If someone finds me uninteresting, they should just feel free to say it. "Mike, I find you uninteresting and frankly, don't ever want to interact with you again." My response, "Thank you for being honest. We shall never interact again. Bye."

Occupy Wall Street is a movement that I've watched with fascination. It's people banding together over simple truths and they are not afraid to let people know that they are upset.  The truth is that some people are living lives that are so much better than others and work far less for it. The truth is that 1% of the people control 99% of the assets. And the truth is that many in that 1% could give a crap about anyone in the 99%. I bet if poor people died by the millions or got gassed, they wouldn't shed a tear. They'd say, "At least I don't have to support deadbeats anymore." They should just tell the truth. Let people see them for the assholes that they are.

Funniest truth I heard all week came from a Catholic. I respect what he said. "Go through life and sin a lot. Otherwise, Jesus died for nothing." I was stunned given his beliefs but laughed my ass off.

Most people are so fake. I'm kinda sick of it. Do the world a favor. Next time you find yourself wanting to tell a lie...just stop. Come out with the brutal honest truth. Let people see you for who you are. Be true to thyself.

I'm Insecure and interviewed at the same time in one day.

It's time once again for the monthly "Insecure Writer's Support Group" that Alex Cavanaugh started on his blog four months ago (wow 1/3 of a year gone just like that).

Today, my insecurity is just wondering if I suck or not. As my publishing date looms, I almost feel like bagging the whole thing and stuffing my book into a box somewhere and never letting it see the light of day. I just don't have any confidence in myself. However, against this cowardly inner voice is that of my friend Kathy.  Over Thanksgiving I gave her an ARC to read and she's already finished it. She told me she thought it was incredible which made me feel really good.  It was the right kind of random input given at just the right moment to make me shake off my issues with my writing.  Do any of you hear those voices? The kind that whisper to you that you suck? I hate those voices.

The other part of today's post is an interview. I was checking my inbox the other day, and I came across an email addressed to moi asking if I'd like to be interviewed. I instantly thought, this is going to be fun! I've never been interviewed before. So if you'd like to check it out, please go visit the lovely >>> click>>> Leigh Covington at her amazing blog.

I'm just tickled because I got to talk about my book. No one ever wants to talk about my book. I'm not saying that's a bad thing...that's just what writers are like, you know? They talk about their books, and expect you to listen.  I'm content doing that because someone has to listen, you know?  I try very hard to be a good listener because I don't think people get listened to enough (not even Alex and he has a whole lot of people listening to him).

Finally, I want to say that I appreciate all the support from the "to read" clickers on my goodreads sparkling cookie gif featured on the right.

Now for some Wednesday witchcraft.

On the gif below, place your hand in the center of the image and the dots will appear to move faster.

You're welcome.
Happy Wednesday!

I'm a Pied Piper and the Easily Flushed Blog Hop

L.G. Smith over at Bards and Prophets bequeathed me with the Pied Piper Blog Award created by the Geek Twins (I guess Alex infected her a few days ago)...anywho...thank you L.G.!
The rules are simple:

1) List three of your favorite followers and why.
2) Pass the award onto three bloggers that you feel deserve their followers the most.

I'm going to break the rules a little and pick out some followers that don't get a lot of comment love (and I hope that changes):

1) Benoit Lelievre has a cerebral book blog called Dead End Follies where he analyzes books that he reads and talks about serious film. I hope that you go and visit and partake of some of his wisdom because the man is smart smart smart.

2) Mr. Briane Pagel who keeps several blogs. The one I visit the most is Thinking the Lions. It's mostly about his journey through life as a middle-aged lawyer who has one set of grown kids and another set of babies who just happen to be autistic and run like perpetual motion machines.

3) Ms. Marjorie who sometimes writes on her blog Upwards Over The Mountain. She says in her latest post that she is considering another blog. What I really like about Marjorie is how worldly she is. She's incredibly young, speaks multiple languages, has been to China and Taiwan, lives in New York City...I mean...sheesh...just incredible. So whenever she chooses to breeze on by I think it's wonderful. I feel like Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City has recognized me for just a moment.

Okay, so now who do I pass this award onto?

1) Patrick Dilloway who blogs at Grumpy Bulldog's blog. Patrick's personality is similar to my own so I think
 it's natural that we are blogging buddies.  He's not afraid to say what he thinks, and I appreciate that honesty.

2) Brooke R. Busse because I promised Brooke that she would from now on be the recipient of blog awards that got passed onto me. Aside from that though, she's just a really smart writing person/woman/teenager. Brooke's blog is at Paper Mountain. Get to know her now before she is famous. Famous people don't ever look at you anymore.

3) Charity Bradford because Charity is going to win the Hugo, and I want to say that I predicted it here first. Find this awesome future award winning author at her blog Charity's Writing Journey and ride her coattails of success.
I've joined the Easily Flushed Blog Hop that is the brainchild of Cassie Mae. It takes place all day today. The prize is a $10 Amazon Gift Card. All you have to do is comment and post this polar bear on your blog and tell people/tweet about the contest. Please follow the link and go win a gift card. :))

Have a great Tuesday.

Meet Kim Simmons of Cubicle Associates

I'm one of those writers that goes to an editor before I actually submit my work to agents or publishers. I know, I know...some people say "that's a waste of money" and "you'll never get that money back." 
Truthfully, I have a job that pays my bills, and I have no illusions about success or the lack thereof. At this point in my life I write because I have stories to tell. I wish I made money at it, but if someone were to ask me, "Do you consider it a job?" I'd answer "No." A job gives you money. Thus far I haven't earned one penny. The balance sheet is in the negative. Do I care? Kinda. But I consider it the cost of doing business.
Big time authors will tell you "Money flows one way...to the author." Well no shit. But sometimes it's good to get someone to edit your book and if you want quality and it to be done in a timely manner by someone with qualifications, then you should pay that person for their time.
I feel lucky to have found Kim. She's affordable, catches many of my obvious errors and some of my not so obvious ones, and she tells me flat out when stuff I write is not working.  She fact checks some and does line-by-line editing. She's also not afraid to tell you when something isn't working and sucks. She edited one of my novels in 2-months. How's that for fast? And I'm serious when I say, working with Kim will not break the bank.
Kim has a business called Cubicle Associates and it's located here .
Q: What made you decide to create Cubicle Associates?

A: I had been on a quest to figure out what my true career desires entail. I've had all these great experiences and I was trying to figure out how to "marry" them. Through brainstorming and prayer...Cubicle Associates was born!

Q: What part of your professional background has proven most valuable with your business ventures?
A: I would say just about every experience. When I was in college I worked my way through as a secretary and administrtiave assistant at the university I attended. I learned a great deal about office etiquette and interacting in a professional setting. As a journalist I found my "voice as a writer" and learned to broaden my scope. Its been a great journey to say the least.

Q: What kind of work are you looking for right now?
A: I'm looking for clients that I can help. Small businesses are ideal because I really believe my talent lies in helping at the ground level. Whether setting up administrative assistant practices to assisting with brand management and marketing; I have a passion to be of help.

Q: Tell us one professional thing about you that you really take pride in that may set you apart from others offering similar services.
A: I'm great a resource. I take great pride in exhausting all avenues of reseach to find answers and/or solutions. Thankfully, down through the years I've built up a good network which makes research and resourcing a bit easier for me.

Q: What advice, if anything, would you offer writers who are looking to publish professionally?
A: Be authentic. No matter the genre, what gets and keeps an audicence is what they can relate to. So don't try to do what someone else has done. Be you. No matter what an editor or professional tells you, there is an audience for your product.

Qualifications:
I graduated from Wayne State University with a BA in Journalism. I was hired first as a general assignment reporter and then promoted to features reporter for the Lima News, in Lima, OH, a newspaper with a daily circulation of 75k. After a number of years in Ohio I moved back to Detroit and began work as the Manager of Events and Conferences for the American Red Cross. In addition I freelance for various local papers in the Detroit area.
Happy Monday and please don't forget to check my Friday post for all the free money you can get just by visiting a couple of blogs.

I want you to win seventy dollars for almost nothing.

This post is about good cheer and what you can do that is absolutely free that will make someone happy.  With December just starting and nano ending for many of the bloggers, there is a lot of loot up for grabs in the blogosphere.  I'm highlighting some of this free loot for my weekend post.  
Seriously guys and gals...we're talkinglike ten minutes of your time max.
First off, my contest for the $10 Amazon gift card is still going.  You can find my post located here .  All that you need to do is leave one comment. That's it and you are in for the drawing.  It's the easiest way to earn ten bucks.  I'm not making you follow anything, subscribe to anything, I don't even care if you never come back to this blog again.  I received instructions from Sarah Belliston who is running the Twelve Days of Christmas thing and she told me to pick a winner on December 22. So that's when the contest ends.

Also Charity Bradford is giving away a $15 gift card to Amazon as well as a one chapter critique. Charity is an INCREDIBLE writer. I've read some of her sci-fi book and I tell you, it was a page turner from beginning to end. I couldn't get enough. I'm so excited for the day when she lands a huge book deal and movie contract and whatever else that she can get her hands on because with talent that big, she has to succeed. But that being said, a one chapter critique from Charity is like OMG so awesome I cannot even describe it. She will set you straight. She will tell you if your story is working. She's got the chops...she's a hair's breadth away from landing an agent as she's pitched to them and they've requested full manuscripts from her, etc.

As if that weren't enough, Mr. Briane Pagel is giving away a $20.00 Amazon Gift Card for just going to a non-profit website and wishing some conjoined twins a Merry Christmas. Seriously, this is easy money. And look at these darling kids...think of how they will smile knowing that strangers are wishing them well. I know that I would. So please go and do so and get in this drawing for $20 bucks.

And the generositydoesn't end there!
Up comes author Patrick Dilloway with an amazing blog hop . I'm posting my entry for it on Monday. But Mr. Dilloway is outdoing me, Charity, and Mr. Pagel with a $25 Amazon gift card for all the participants!
Like seriously...$25 and all you have to do is make one entry for the bah humbug blog fest before December 15th, 2011.
So yeah...that's $70.00 up for grabs on just a handful of blogs not to mention the stuff that Sarah Belliston is giving away on her blog.

Stop being lazy, go and make a few comments, and earn some dough for yourself for Christmas.

Have a great weekend. Ho! Ho! Ho!

Bubba's Resume

My Resimay

To hoom it
mae cunsern,

I waunt to apply for the job
what I saw in the paper.

I kin
Type realee qwik wit one finggar and do sum a
counting.

I think I am good on the
fone and I no I am a pepole person, Pepole realee
seam to reespond too me well. Certain men and all the ladies.

I no my spelling is not
too good but find that I Offen can get a
job wit my
persinalety.

My
salerery is open so we kin discus wat you
want to pay me and wat you think that I am
werth,

I kin start emeditely.
Thank yoo in advanse fore yore
anser..

hopifuly Yore best aplicant so
farr.

Sinseerly,

Bubba

PS:

Because my resimay is a bit short - below is a
pickture of me.
Employer's response:

Dear Bubba:

It's Okay honey ... We've got spell check.

See you tomorrow!
Ladies, don't even deny that you wouldn't hire this guy :P Have a great Thursday :)

Prometheus Plot Synopsis

So I just discovered that the Prometheus plot synopsis has been leaked online. I've read it twice now, and it's mind-blowing. Just as a disclaimer...this thing could be fake. However, I don't think so. It's just too good. I'm posting it here for you to decide for yourself. Have fun reading.  All photographs from the set were taken from Entertainment Weekly.
PROMETHEUS

CAST
Elizabeth Shaw...Noomi Rapace
Rayden Holloway...Logan Marshall-Green
Meredith Vickers...Charlize Theron
David 4.0...Michael Fassbender
Jeremiah Janek...Idris Elba
Theo Zedmore...Guy Pearce
Logan...Ben Foster
Ravel...Benedict Wong
Chance...Emun Elliot
Mudow...Kate Dickie
Yuri...Rafe Spall
Aldrich...Frank Kelly
Francis...Sean Harris
Siena...Tal Berkovich
Lettap...James Payton
Tembrook...Tuppence Middleton

Earth. The beginnings of our world. In an opening montage, we watch as our primordial planet is terraformed and bioformed by seemingly all-powerful, Godlike alien entities...the ENGINEERS. The seeds of life are introduced to Earth for the first time by these fantastic extra-terrestrials, who have the power to create and manipulate both mechanical and biological matter at will. The montage ends as the earliest genetic recipe for life is sent forth from the Engineers' massive, towering CITADEL in the dark desert.

The desolate desert of Africa: 2085. The prehistoric ruins of the Engineers' Citadel is discovered by a corporate construction team tasked with building a nuclear-powered comm-array in the wilderness. Amidst the ancient remains are found highly advanced, biomechanical relics with are determined to be of extra-terrestrial origin. This catches the attention of the mega-conglomerate WEYLAND-YUTANI CORPOTATION, who finances a massive archaeological excavation of the citadel in the hopes of reverse-engineering the alien biotech for financial gain. Running the operation is MEREDITH VICKERS, a cold, calculating corporate executive, who recruits intelligent and independent astrophysicist DR. ELIZABETH SHAW to head up the research team. Assisting Dr. Shaw are xenoarchaeologist DR. THEO ZEDMORE and her fellow astrophysicist DR. LOGAN. Shaw uncovers the secret of the citadel when she discovers a chamber of star charts, which seem to lead the way to the home planet of the Engineers. Also uncovered is evidence suggesting that the Engineers had a database of all life on Earth, and may even have been responsible for its creation including Man.
In a partially-submerged MANHATTAN, Vickers meets with Dr. Shaw and an OPO, (Off-Planet-Officer), CAPTAIN JERAMIAH JANEK, and plans a space mission following the discovered star charts in an effort to find and make first contact with the Engineers. For the scientists and explorers onboard, it will be a journey of discovery, but for Vickers, it's merely a way of obtaining new technology so that Weyland-Yutani may retain the lead in the competitive race to establish colonies off-world.
The depths of space: 2090. A highly-advanced, top-of-the-line ISRV (Interstellar Research Vessel) PROMETHEUS decelerates as it reaches its target solar system. The vessel's crew emerges from their cryo-chambers. Along with Elizabeth Shaw, Theo Zedmore, Logan, Meredith Vickers, and Captain Janek, the crew of the Prometheus is comprised of: First Officer MUDOW, Security Officer RAYDEN HOLLOWAY, Navigator CHANCE, Helm Officer RAVEL, Operations Android DAVID 4.0, Political Officer ALDRICH, Medical Officer FRANCIS, Engineer YURI, and Technical Officers SIENA, LETTUP, and TEMBROOK. The crew gets acclimated to their removal from cryo-sleep, their muscles in atrophy from five years without use. Holloway assists Shaw in her physical therapy exercises.

The crew prepares for arrival at the home planet of the Engineers. Shaw and Holloway are instantly attracted to each other, initiating a romantic relationship. However, as they enter the Zeta 2 Reticuli star system, Prometheus encounters a massive disturbance which hadn't appeared on scanners, one even more powerful than a black hole: a wormhole in space. Prometheus is sucked into the wormhole, and after a harrowing ride, emerges on the other end. The ship crashes on a barren planet, which the damaged computer system identifies as the mission's final destination.

The crew sets about attempting to repair the Prometheus, while Elizabeth Shaw leads a recon expedition to investigate nearby structures, which turn out to be a cavernous Engineer temple. Inside the temple, Shaw's team encounters a bizarre BIO-BRAIN, a biomechanical humanoid face set within a towering pillar, as well as thousands of seemingly primitive URNS. David takes several of the urns back to the vessel for analysis.

Investigating the urns, David discovers that they contain the genetic material for thousands of species within a viscous liquid called BIOFORMER which can rewrite any living organism on a cellular level. Basically, possession of the substance gives its owner the power to create life. Vickers interacts with David and seemingly innocently leads to the Bioformer infecting David through a cut in his finger.

Within the depths of the Temple, we find several living Engineers who discover the transgression of the Humans, and remotely rewrite the stolen Bioformer to make it into a weapon. The Engineers capture Holloway and run a number of horrific experiments on him, injecting him with the Bioformer and allowing him to return to the vessel.

Subsequently, the crew of the Prometheus begins to fall victim to the now weaponized substance, as the "carrier" Holloway injects Ravel, Zedmore, Francis, Siena, Lettup, and Tembrook. The victims begin to lose their humanity and slowly transform, experiencing nightmarish visions and hallucinations and making pilgrimages to the depths of the Temple to receive instructions from the Bio-Brain. Holloway, in particular, is resistant to the transformation, fighting against the alien influence with his feelings for Shaw and his responsibilities as security officer. Meanwhile, David finds that the Bioformer is making him into a biological being...making him Human. The crew also finds that their trip through the wormhole took them back hundreds of millions of years and they are actually stranded on primordial Earth, having moved through space and time.
Eventually, as alien influence and the continued lurking presence of the Engineers becomes clear, the crew of the Prometheus turns on each other as the infected human victims fully mutate into PROTOFORMS: vicious, skeletal alien monstrosities which proceed to assault the unaffected Human crew through the halls of the Prometheus.

Mudow, Logan, Chance, Aldrich, Yuri, and Janek end up being destroyed by the Protoforms. In a strange, erotic ceremony, the Protoforms seemingly mate with the Bio-Brain and each other to create thousands of EGGS, the first of a new generation of the monsters. Meredith Vickers is revealed to be a sleeper CONSTRUCT of the Engineers, who are still active in their far future and Shaw's present due to the time-travelling abilities of the wormhole. Vickers was grown in an Engineer lab but escaped, fleeing to Earth while always wanting to her find creators and take their power. The Engineers activate Vickers' secondary GENE PROGRAMMING, and she transforms into an ALPHA PROTOFORM: the STAR BEAST.

At last, the two remaining crew members, Elizabeth Shaw and David, seek to confront the Engineers in the Temple. The Godlike entities prove to be utterly evil, and David sacrifices himself as he's dissolved in the LIFE SEED BIOFORMER which is the basic genetic recipe for MAN: the former android David, it turns out, is the basis for all Mankind. Shaw is captured by Holloway, but he regains enough of his humanity to remotely activate an Engineer vessel for Shaw's escape, then holds the other Protoforms and Engineers at bay. As Shaw escapes, she finds herself in the midst of the initial Engineer terraforming of Earth which we had witnessed in the opening montage, chased by the former Meredith Vickers who is now the gigantic, horrific Star Beast.

Shaw makes to her escape vessel which blasts off for the wormhole, Holloway fighting the Star Beast with both falling into the wormhole and disappearing. An Engineer PILOT detaches from the Temple in a FAMILIAR VESSEL and follows Shaw, but is lost in the wormhole. Shaw emerges above the Earth of her present day; however, she's deemed insane and responsible for the loss of her expedition and confined to a psychiatric hospital by the Company. It's implied that there are at least some of those who believe Shaw's tale, but have silenced her as part of a cover-up.
In the final scene, we see the vessel of the Engineer that was chasing Elizabeth Shaw emerge from the wormhole in the Zeta 2 Reticuli star system, still in the prehistoric past, and crash on a nearby planetoid, the Engineer Pilot helplessly lost and the EGGS in the ship's cargo hold stirring as something alive moves from within...

The Beginning

So what do you guys think? Excited? Terrified? All of the above?

How clean is the language in your novel?

This is the Nebula Award. It's cool. I want one.Every once in a while, I read a post written by an author who believes that swear words, vulgarity, and sex should not be in a novel. Usually these posts come from prudish or religious individuals who have somehow gotten it into their heads that by doing so, it somehow helps their "sales".

I have just one thing to say about that and it has to do with this short story located here.
I suggest that you go and take a look at it. The title is "Spar" and it's by Kij Johnson.
It's a 2009 Nebula winner, was nominated for a Hugo, and was a finalist for a Locus award. In my world, these are amazing credits...awards that I would like to have.
So if you are one of these writers that is afraid to use swear words in your writing, if you are one of those writers that is afraid to portray graphic sex...I think you should ask yourself why.  If the writing demands the use of it, these things are in your toolbox.  To not use them may be the reason why your novel has a flat tire or why your short story is just...meh.
That's just my opinion of course. Take it for what you will.
For the record, I use the "f-bomb" in my book quite often. And yeah, there's one scene of graphic sex. But I'm not marketing my book to kids.  I guess that taking risks in your writing can be the equivalent of sticking your neck out, right? 
"Oh my goodness...what will my family think of me if I show teenagers swearing and having sex?"
What will they think of you indeed?
Have a great Tuesday.

The 12 Days of Christmas Blog Hop and an Amazon Gift Card

I missed you guys! First off, thank you for all the support on Goodreads in hitting "to read" on my upcoming book. I spilled over to page-2 sometime during the long weekend and that made me squee just a little.

Today's post is a giveaway.  Blogger Sarah Belliston has organized a 12-days of Christmas blog hop.  If you go to her website, she has a list of twelve blogs that are all giving something away for the month of December.  If you like free stuff, then visit the 12 blogs, comment on them, and you may win something if you're lucky.

So which day am I? I'm the "Ten Lords A Leaping" day of Christmas.
To celebrate my role in the festivities, I will be giving away one $10 Amazon Gift Certificate to celebrate the Christmas season (Ten Lords A Leaping--$1 for each lord--I thought I was being clever).

I would hope that whoever the lucky winner may be, that they would consider buying one of the fine Indie books that I have reviewed on this blog to help out a fellow author.

Okay, so how do you win? Easy.

All you have to do is comment on this post and on the chosen day detailed by Sarah's blog, I will use random.org and select a winner and send you the gift certificate through the email. It's that simple :)

So comment away and have a great Monday. I hope your long weekend was great and that you didn't get "pepper sprayed" at Wal-Mart on Black Friday.

Practice Cake by Dalya Moon is le awesome

I read a book called Practice Cake.

I read it.

I loved it.

And now I'm telling you about it.

It's YA but it isn't paranormal.  Rather, it's very normal.  It even comes with a reality t.v. show. And despite the fact that I am nor never will be a celebrity of any kind, it struck close to heart.
The setting of Practice Cake is a wonderful bakery that instills within
me the same wonderful feeling I had when I watched Ratatouille.Near the very end of this book, all that Maddie has gone through comes into a brilliant focus with this clear line:

"The world is full of people who are willing to use you, and they aren't always who they seem."

I barely learned this lesson only a few years ago, and I daresay that some never learn it.  What Ms. Moon has wrought with "Practice Cake" is a beautiful novel for young women everywhere by giving voice to a protagonist called Maddie who seems to meet all the wrong men.

At first, I was annoyed with Maddie. She didn't seem to have any spine at all. She was a tumbleweed, a victim that things happened to, and she rarely took charge of her life. Instead events just happened to her and she seemed entirely out of control of her own decisions even when they came to something as large as moving to Australia with a man that she hardly knew.
Maddie goes from Chaos to Order in this book. It's something every one of us must
suffer through at one point in our lives. The journey is beautiful.But Ms. Moon also gives Maddie great strength. And this comes full circle in the end when Maddie learns to pay attention to that voice inside. The last few chapters of this book turn this novel into more than just a slice-of-life story about a girl that works in a bakery.  Ms. Moon sticks the ending as solid as a gold-medal figure skater can perform a quad. It's in this ending where she earns her five stars (out of five).
In "Practice Cake" Maddie grows as a person and the journey is filled with great lines, whimsy, and the voice of a girl that is leaving her teen years behind and becoming a young woman.  And in the end, Maddie realizes that family has got her back and that the man of her dreams is right there in front of her (and has been almost the whole time).  All she needed to do is say "I choose the car" and just like in a game show, what's behind door number 2 becomes "the road less traveled by and it makes all the difference". And to boot, he smells like sunshine. :)
This is Dalya Moon.
She wrote a wonderful book.Q: Why did we have to wait so long for Hudson to really come into the picture? The man smells like sunshine. It's not fair that you just put him in at the very end and not let us spend a little time with him.

A: I'm so glad you liked Hudson! I agree it was cruel of me to leave him to the end.

Q: Why are Parker, Drew, and Snackboy so horrible? I can believe that there are men out there like this. But in defense of men and boys everywhere, I think that there is some literary hyperbole you are exercising in parading out the worst traits of men and throwing them at your protagonist. However, that is your right since this is your story. What I'm interested in is where all this man-bashing came from? Care to elaborate?

Do you mean ... am I exacting literary revenge on some guys who broke my heart? Like the writer of 500 Days of Summer? Nope, I'm afraid I'm not that scandalous. They're fictional people.

A: I prefer to think that the actions of a character reflect on that character alone, and not the author's opinion of an entire gender, though sometimes I've read books where all the female characters are awful, and it does give me a bad feeling. I hope that my male friends and readers will notice that there are also some terrific male characters in this book and my other stories too.

This does lead into one of the dilemmas writers face, though: is the story balanced? And does it matter, if the point is to tell a story? I remember reading an article, by a person with albinism, about his anger that persons with albinism are always the bad guys in movies, and never the hero. This led me to, years later, write a short story with a protagonist with albinism. But I could have gone the other way, and created the most deliciously evil, pale villain ever. Would that have made me a bad person? Or just an irresponsible writer? Would it make any difference if the author name on the cover were a different gender or ethnicity?

Q: When I read this book, I thought there was a clear message that you were sending out to the young girls that will read it. For me, that message is "Stop being a victim and stand up for yourself." Maddie does this in the elevator using a trope that I've never seen before anywhere...holding a hyperdermic needle to the man she potentially loves to get some answers. In the U.S., this would be considered assault. I don't know if Canada has similar laws. However, I liked it. Am I right on the message, or would you say there is another message here, and I missed it?
There is so much heart break in this book.A: You make it sound so scandalous! In real life, I don't think people should threaten to assault each other to get to the truth, but this is why it's a novel, and not my how-to manual about how young ladies ought to behave. I'll write that one in forty years or so, once I have it all figured out.

As for a message, I have to say I'm an entertainer first. All things being equal, I think most of us prefer to read stories about protagonists who have some morals, care about others, and finish up a bit smarter than where they started. My job as a writer is to entertain the reader and to facilitate that last thing.

Q: You have an ultra-modern vocabulary and are quite inventive with "Hashtag this and hashtag that..." How do you stay so up-to-date on things young girls are talking about?

A: I have a theory that if I make characters interesting, people will want to believe they're real, so I just try to make them all interesting.

Q: Do girls really think about their boobs as much as Maddie does in this book?

A: The less you have, the more you think about them.
Love is never this simple, is it?Q: How did you get the bakery details?

A: I would go into my local neighborhood bakeries and stare and stare like a weirdo. A friend finally got me a tour around the kitchen of Butter, a fantastic bakery in the Dunbar area of Vancouver. I asked the baker there what the plastic things covering the rolling trays were called, and he shrugged and said, "Plastic things," so that detail went into the book.

Q: How did you get the idea for this book aside from it being set in Vancouver where you live and it taking place around the time of the riots earlier this year?

A: I came up with the title first, which led naturally to the bakery setting. Then one day I was walking down the sidewalk and realized I was being filmed. I had walked past a local business that has a show on the Food network. Ahah! It all started to come together. I hadn't set a story in Vancouver yet, so I figured this was the perfect opportunity.

I started writing the book in 2010, and I really questioned whether or not to include the riots of Summer 2011, or set it back in Summer 2010. I'm usually very decisive, but I spent weeks debating that one choice. It scared me, so I decided to go for it.

Q: What advice do you have for others who want to write YA?

It's all about the characters.


If you would like a copy of Practice Cake, you can buy it for your very own on Amazon for only $2.99.

You can find Dalya Moon at her blog where she frequently blogs about her projects and the writing process.

I am going on a blog break for one week for the Thanksgiving holiday. Enjoy your turkey or whatever it is that you eat. I will pick up blogging again on Monday, November 28th, 2011. In the meantime, I will be visiting blogs and commenting on them.