Duchess Harris's Blog, page 4

FRIENDS WITHOUT JOBS

A few weeks ago I read an article in Slate Magazine written by Emily Bazelon entitled. "The Recession Wrecks Friendships: One friend gets poorer, the other stays the same." I remember thinking, the recession sucks, but can we blame it for everything?"

I have always been class conscious in my friendships. I was the first to introduce a second income, and for many of my friends that still hasn't happened. Not only that, for the last five years I've had a job that you can't be fired from.

That sai

WHEN DOVES CRY FOR MICHAEL JACKSON

My response to Michael Jackson's death surprised me. I didn't expect the tears to well, but they actually did. For me, Michael Jackson was more than his music; he was a touchstone for my adolescence.

I remember getting off the school bus in May of 1983 thinking that 8th grade was almost over, and that I was ready for high school. My good friend and I had our 14th birthdays two days apart, and he surprised me with the best gift ever—my first album, Michael Jackson's, Thriller.

I had just gotten

RONDO AND THE RAIL: STANDING FAST AGAINST GENTRIFICATION

I always thought I'd raise my kids in a middle class Black neighborhood. I've lived in the Twin Cities for 18 years and I still haven't found one. I grew up around middle class Black people, and didn't think much about it until I moved out here and discovered how deep and real the racialized class divisions are.

A few weeks ago, the Preserve and Benefit Historic Rondo Committee (PBHRC) filed a civil rights complaint with the Federal Transportation Administration's office of civil rights against t

BIRTHDAY PARTY CULTURE

When I was growing up in the '70s, birthday parties consisted of paper plates, Duncan Hines cakes and store brand ice cream. We pinned a tail on the donkey, and received coloring books for gifts. There were no themes and moms weren't given six weeks' notice to find "appropriate dress."

My daughter was invited to her first birthday party when she was 3 ½. In October 2007, Avril came home with a save-the-date card for a December "pirate-themed" birthday party.

I was stunned. Then I realized that

The ESSENCE of "How We Do It"

It's not every evening that you get a text from a friend that says, I just opened ESSENCE MAGAZINE and you are on page 136.

I have known since March that I was chosen to be the July issue's "How She Does It" woman, but I had only told two friends.  It's not that I'm not excited, I'm actually very proud.  If you had told me eight years ago that I would know how to manage the life I have now, I would have fallen on the floor laughing. 

 My hesitance was more related to how common my story feels.

THE YELLOW ROSE OF FORTY

My Dad bought yellow roses four times in his life.

Forty years ago today, my Dad bought my Mom yellow roses to celebrate my birth. He never bought yellow roses again until I graduated from college. I carried a dozen three years later on my wedding day, and the last time he bought them was 12 years ago: May 16, 1997, my Ph.D. commencement and my 28th birthday.

My Dad passed away on April 25, 2007 so I won't be receiving yellow roses on the day I turn forty. I will be attending another Commencement,