Sam Barry's Blog, page 15
December 28, 2009
The Daily Sam: Why We Love Our Pets
The other day I went to Paul "Mister Bass Man" Olguin's house for his annual holiday party. Paul is one of my musician colleagues and is the only person I know who is half Scottish, half Cuban, which has resulted in a form of mild insanity. "Imagine the conversations in my head," says Paul. Actually, I don't have to imagine them, because Paul says pretty much everything he is thinking ...
December 22, 2009
The Daily Sam's Christmas Message
I was raised to believe in miracles. My dad, David Barry, was a Midwestern-born Presbyterian minister who dedicated himself to improving people's lives in the toughest New York neighborhoods. He knew that he would lose many more battles than he ever won, but he believed every small victory was worth the struggle. Marion Barry, my mom, was a Methodist gal from Dust Bowl era Eastern ...
December 18, 2009
The Daily Sam: How to Have an Affair
In light of the recent very public marital scandal involving Des Moines, Iowa handyman Hubert Bothem, it seems that the time has come for the Daily Sam to step up and offer some basic tips and guidelines for how to properly have an affair. America has changed since the days when George Washington confessed to his wife Martha that he had "chopped down a cherry tree." A national hero, ...
December 15, 2009
The Daily Sam: Gifts for People You Hate
At the end of the last Daily Sam, which featured absurdly expensive gift ideas, I promised that I would follow with gift ideas for people you hate. Using the top-secret research method of Google search, I quickly learned that this idea is not so original. In fact, not only is it not original—I am frankly a little worried about the frame of mind of the rest of humanity. (I know I'm okay.) Here ...
December 11, 2009
The Daily Sam Impending Holiday Gift Guide
Once again the holidays are looming, with all that this glorious season means: guilt, fear, hostility, mindless crowds, forced gaiety at work, over-consumption of food, alcohol, and other substances, the torturous repetition of "Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer, The Little Drummer Boy," and soft jazz versions of "Winter Wonderland"—and for many, week-long bouts of suicidal depression.In an ...
December 8, 2009
The Daily Sam's 250 Years to Eternity Health Program
We Americans are out of shape, eat garbage, are overworked, and frequently engage in risky behaviors.Do you feel judged? You should: if you are an American, you are a bad person. But there is hope. In order to live forever, or at least 250 years, we must exercise, eat right, lower our stress levels, and not touch other people. Sound hard? It is! But the Daily Sam 250 Years to Eternity Health ...
December 3, 2009
The Daily Sam: Sex and Religion
Religion has a sex problem.Here's the thing—all the world's major religions say God is a guy, or if there is more than one God, then the Alpha-God is male. Oh sure, theologians and religious leaders can claim this god-talk is metaphorical, but the boy's club mentality doesn't stop with the divine being: the founders of all the Fortune 500 religions are men; the important leadership ...
November 29, 2009
The Daily Sam: The Tiger Woods Crisis
What was Tiger Woods doing at 2:30 AM? And what was his wife Elin Nordegren Woods doing with that golf club? Was this a case of a couple going to play midnight-miniature golf gone terribly awry? These are the burning issues facing America—and the world—on day 213 of the Tiger Woods crisis.If, by chance, you are one of the eleven Americans who hasn't heard about Tiger driving over a fire ...
November 26, 2009
The Daily Sam: Counting Our Blessings
On the day before Thanksgiving we were robbed. During the night thieves gained access to our home and stole Kathi's Stratocaster guitar, my keyboard, some amps and other musical equipment, our car, and Kathi's son and my stepson Tony's car, which was parked in front of our house. It was a disaster and we were all miserable. Some of what was stolen can't be replaced. Our home was violated, ...
November 22, 2009
The Daily Sam: The Big Easy Health Plan
This week I am attending the annual convention of the Society of Biblical Literature (motto: making the Bible even more baffling than it already is) in New Orleans, Louisiana on behalf of HarperOne. Barbara Brown Taylor, author of An Altar in the World, told me she rode in the elevator here with two drunken men who couldn't remember if they had eaten dinner. They decided to count the cash in ...
