Marty Nemko's Blog, page 429

I teach a 3-hour class this Sat. at Berkeley Adult School: How to Do Life

Berkeley Adult School has asked me back to teach another three-hour class this Saturday, Oct. 5 from 10 AM to 1 PM.



This one will be based on my book, How to Do Life: What They Didn't Teach You in School.



I'll discuss such topics as how to find and make the most of a mentor, how to negotiate well without having to be too aggressive, how to succeed in difficult conversations, and yes, my thoughts on the meaning of life.



It is free although you're asked to make a $10 to $15 donation to Berkeley Adult School's scholarship fund. No one, however, will be turned away because of lack of funds.



HERE is the info for signing up.

How to Run a Meeting

What's the first word that comes to mind when I say the word "meetings?"



Common answers are "boring" and "waste."



Yet planned and run well, meetings can be valuable, even fun.



How good are or would you be at running a meeting? I offer a quiz in my USNews.com article today.

Come See Jeffrie Givens and Me in Her One-Woman Show: Big, Black, and Shy

Jeffrie Givens with my doggie, Einstein, who has a role in the show

I'm pleased to announce the seventh performance of the one-woman show I have produced, directed, co-wrote, and piano-accompany, Big, Black and Shy. 



It will be at 2 PM on Sunday, Nov. 17 at my home at 5936 Chabolyn Terrace, Oakland, CA. The first six performances all sold out and all received a standing ovation. And since then, we've worked to improve the show further.





Me accompanying Jeffrie in Big, Black & Shy

Big, Black, and Shy is the inspiring story of, and told by, Jeffrie Givens, one of the shyest people ever to come out of East Oakland who additionally struggled because her values were different from the typical kids' in her community.



She tells her story in words and in songs---mainly Broadway show tunes--and truly, she's gone from being a performer who was stiffer than a cadaver to, well, you'll see.



Rossmoor News reviewer, Charlie Jarrett, in his review of the show, described the show as "Wow, what a terrific voice and what an inspiring story. Givens is an
extremely talented young woman! After the show, I found myself comparing
this experience in some degree to what I felt when I first witnessed
Susan Boyle perform on 'Britain's Got Talent.'”



We believe the show is enjoyed best in an intimate setting so, as I said, we are doing it at my home, where there are only 22 seats. Champagne will be served.



As I also mentioned, each of the previous six performances sold out early, so if you'd like to come, I suggest you buy your tickets now. They are $20 (all goes to Jeffrie) and you can buy them by emailing me your MasterCard or Visa number, expiration date, the zip code on the card's billing address and, of course, the number of tickets you want. My email address is mnemko@comcast.net. No one has ever emailed me their credit card information and had that information stolen but if you're concerned, you can fax that information to me at 510-655-4777.  When the show is sold out, I will note that on this blog.

Good Bioscience Careers That Don't Require a Ph.D.

It's widely agreed that bioscience careers will likely remain in demand but are there under-the-radar ones that don't require a Ph.D.



I describe three in my latest AOL.com article. HERE is the link.

Are You Assertive Enough? A Self-Assessment

Are you assertive enough? That's the topic of my today's USNews.com article.

Excitable Ed: A story for children and adults

I've just drafted my second children's story. Like the previous one, it's as much for adults as for kids.



The text is below as is a video of me reading it aloud. Even as an adult I enjoy being read to.



Feedback welcome.










Excitable Ed

(to be illustrated)


From the day he was born, Ed was excitable. He popped out practically waving pom-poms.



The day his baby sister was born, he tried to dance with her.



When his preschool teacher told the class to slowly melt like ice cream cones, by the time the other kids melted, he had melted, straightened, melted, straightened, and melted again. 



But when he started kindergarten, people weren't so happy with Ed's being so excitable.



When the teacher asked a question, Ed would blurt out the answer. "Edward, you must wait until you're called on."



When the teacher said it was time for recess, Ed raced to get a ball but the teacher said, "Walk, don't run. Edward!  Now you can't have a ball."



One day at recess, there were pigeons sitting on the top of the roof. Ed kept jumping up to get a better look---until one of them pooped on his head.  All the kids laughed at Ed.



The kids didn't like Ed. They would imitate him zooming around and didn't even care that he saw them. The teacher once called him "Excitable Ed" and now that's the only thing the kids call him: "Hi Excitable Ed!" "Zoom around for us, Excitable Ed!"



Still, Ed wanted to make friends so when he saw other kids giving little presents to each other, he bought a piece of bubble gum for every kid in the class, but when he started to give them out, one kid said, "That's stupid!" Another kid tattled to the teacher, "Ed has gum in class!" And the teacher said, "Give me that gum, Edward.! Don't you know there's no gum in class?!" Ed bowed his head and gave her the gum.



Then one day at recess, when someone kicked the kickball into the street, Ed, trying to be nice, raced after it....and didn't see the car coming. Splat!



Now, Ed had to be in the hospital while they put his body in a whole body cast.



The teacher called Ed's mother and said, "I really think Edward should start taking a drug to calm him down." His mother politely said, "I'll think about it." Ed asked his mom, "If I take that drug, will I still be me?"



The teacher passed-around a get-well card for Ed's classmates to sign but most of the kids snickered and didn't sign it. Not one kid came to see Ed in the hospital.



Ed had to share the room with another boy: Dave too had been in a car accident. Dave's face was covered with bandages, like a mummy. With Ed's whole body in a cast, they made quite a pair.



For the first time anyone could remember, Ed was quiet--he was exhausted from the accident. Besides, it's hard to zoom around when your whole body is in a cast.



Everyone in the hospital liked the calm, quiet Ed--except himself. He felt like he lost his real self. Now, he was Boring Ed.



But one thing that didn't get put in a cast was his heart.



"Don't worry, Dave" said Ed. The bandages will come off soon."



"I'm scared of what I'll look like," Dave replied. The doctor's supposed to come in any minute now to take off the bandages,"



Don't worry. You'll look good again fast."



And just then, the doctor walked in, and after a too-quick hello, removed the bandages.



Monsters looked better.



Ed forced himself not to say, "Oh my God." And it was a good thing Dave couldn't see himself in the mirror.



But then he could. Dave pulled a small mirror from his bedside drawer. "Oh my God!..Will I be like this forever?"



The doctor replied, "No but you'll need some more surgeries."



"Will I look normal then?"



"Quite possibly. Um, Dave, you're healing well. So good news:  you can go home! Your parents will be here in a few minutes." And the doctor walked out.



Ed said, "What counts is what's on your inside."



"That's not what the kids think." Dave replied.



Ed said, "If you're nice on the inside, it's shines outside too. Kids like nice people as much as they like good-looking people."



After Dave left, Ed laid there thinking: Does it really matter more what's on the inside? Will people like me only when I'm not my real self? Should I take that drug--for me, for the other kids? And Excitable Ed closed his eyes.



Do you think Ed should take the drug?

Take Your Parents to Work Day

Parent power is underutilized at in the workplace. Now, some leading companies are having Take Your Parents to Work Days. I write about that in my today's AOL.com article.

The Flytrap and Iris: A Children's Story (but not really)

I've just written a draft of a children's book, although it may be more for adults. Comments welcome.



And I'd greatly appreciate it if you would have a child read it or read it to him, ask for honest feedback, and pass that feedback on to me.




The Flytrap and Iris

A children's story (but not really)

 (to be illustrated) 


Deep in the bog, with the cicadas singing, Mama Venus Flytrap no longer looked so scary. Her leaves were yellow and
limp.



Even her traps' jaws were limp. And even though a tasty beetle sat
in one of her traps, the trap would not close.



Mama's son, looked up at her,
worried.



"It's all right, my son. It's my time to return to the earth. It
is your time to grow up from the earth."



"Mama, please don't die," the
boy whispered.



Mama's leaves got so limp they started to shrivel. "And
remember son, I know you love to eat but eat only one fly each day. More and you'll melt into the earth."



And with that, mama melted into the earth.



And the
boy was sad. Very sad.



And he was scared. It was his first time alone and
he worried he'd always be alone. Sure, there were a lot of baby
venuses there, but they didn't seem to count.



The boy was just old enough to start noticing things. He noticed that he had eight red traps. He thought they were kind of ugly and wished they were green like the rest of him.



He also noticed things outside himself:



He looked to the left. Just some baby venuses and some brush.



He looked to the right .Just some baby venuses and some peat.



He looked ahead. Just some baby venuses and lots of bog.



But then he looked behind. And there was an iris.



And it was beautiful.



It was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.



It's hard for flytraps to talk, especially young ones, but he summoned all his energy and croaked "Hi."



Iris stared at his traps and even though they were small, those teeth! She got scared and so she looked away.



Embarrassed and sad, he turned away too.



Days passed and every so often, a fly or beetle would fall into his trap and as soon as it touched two of the trap's trigger hairs, the trap slammed shut. Well, a growing boy has to eat. 



And the boy grew bigger.



And every so often he would look at Iris. But the bigger he got, the scarier he looked and the faster she turned away. So he did too.



Months passed and now he was big. And all those baby venuses were almost as big as he was.



And then one day, there was loud buzzing: Beetles!



He looked at Iris. She was covered with beetles! They were eating her!!



The boy widened his traps and squeezed really hard so lots of the glistening, attractive dew sat in the traps.



And it worked! A beetle jumped off Iris and right onto his trap. Snap! Dinner is served.



But there still were beetles, lots of beetles, all over Iris. He didn't care that she had been scared of him. He loved her. He really wanted to save her.



But what could he do? The beetles had chewed big holes in Iris's leaves and were making more holes, faster and faster.



She was starting to wilt. He had to think of something, and fast!.



He thought and he thought. And then he noticed the other flytraps. Yes!



Even though flytraps find it very hard to speak, love makes almost anything possible. So he tried to speak but, alas, all that came out was digested beetle!



He tried again. More digested beetle!



He tried yet again and, finally, words came out: "Please help me save my Iris!"



But the other flytraps didn't move.



"Please!," he cried.



Still the flytraps remained still.



He screamed, "I love her more than life itself."



And that moved the flytraps. Suddenly, most of them squeezed as hard as they could. And their traps opened as wide as they could and their traps were covered with that glistening, attractive dew.



And like a magnet,  the beetles jumped into the traps. Well, most of them.



Exhausted, all the other flytraps fell asleep.



But two beetles were still left on Iris. Now what?!



The boy couldn't eat them himself. He had just eaten one and remembered what his mama had warned him: "Eat more than one in a day and you'll die."



But the boy looked at Iris and he knew what he had to do.



He squeezed harder than he ever had in his entire life.



And then he squeezed some more.



And all his traps opened the widest they'd ever been, even wider than you do when the doctor tells you to "Say ah!"



And all the traps were completely covered with that glistening, attractive dew.



And just like that, the two beetles jumped from Iris and into his traps. Snap. Snap.



The boy looked at Iris. And he was happy.



And this time, she did not look away. She leaned toward him.



And the boy was very happy.



But then the boy felt sick.



And he wondered, "Should I have eaten those beetles?"



And the boy's red traps turned to a green, a sickly green.



Would you have eaten the beetles?



(I plan to include three endings, so the parent or child can choose



SAD ENDING

And he melted into the earth and joined his mama.



HAPPY ENDING

Iris leaned over the boy, putting her head into one of his traps so her pollen--some would call in fairy dust, others plant medicine--could drop onto the now not-so glistening dew.



Whereupon suddenly, the boy started to shake and shake.



And he vomited up the beetles.



Iris continued to lean over the boy. She gently shut his trap and then held it, the way lovers hold hands.



And the boy started to look healthier and healthier.



And Iris and Flytrap looked at each other, knowing they'll be best friends forever.



AMBIGUOUS ENDING

Iris knew that if she used her body to shield the boy from the sun for two days, he would live, but she---who can live only in shade--would likely die.



If you were Iris, what would you do?

Venus and Iris: A Children's Story (but not really)

I've just written a draft of a children's book, although it may be more for adults. Comments welcome.




Venus and Iris

A children's story (but not really)

 (to be illustrated) 


Deep in the bog, with the cicadas singing, Mama Venus Flytrap no longer looked so scary. Her leaves were yellow and
limp.



Even her traps' jaws were limp. And even though a tasty beetle sat
in one of her her traps, the trap would not close.



Mama's son looked up at her,
worried.



"It's all right, my son. It's my time to return to the earth. It
is your time to grow up from the earth."



"Mama, please don't die," the
boy whispered.



Mama's leaves got so limp they started to shrivel. "And
remember son, I know you love to eat but eat only one fly each day. More and you'll melt into the earth."



And with that, mama melted into the earth.



And the
boy was sad. Very sad.



And he was scared. It was his first time alone and
he worried he'd always be alone. Sure, there were a lot of baby
venuses there, but they didn't seem to count.



He was just old enough to start noticing things. He noticed that he had eight red traps. He thought they were kind of ugly and wished they were green like the rest of him.



He also noticed things outside himself. He looked to the left. Just some baby venuses and some brush.



He looked to the right .Just some baby venuses and some peat.



He looked ahead. Just some baby venuses and lots of bog.



But then he looked behind. And there was an iris.



And it was beautiful.



It was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.



It's hard for flytraps to talk, especially young ones, but he summoned all his energy and croaked "Hi."



Iris stared at his traps andeven though they were little, those teeth! She got scared and so she looked away.



Embarrassed and sad, he turned away too.



Days passed and every so often, a fly or beetle would fall into his trap and as soon as it touched two of the trap's trigger hairs, the trap slammed shut. Well, a growing boy has to eat. 



And the boy grew bigger.



And every so often he would look at Iris. But the bigger he got, the scarier he looked and the faster she turned away. So he did too.



Months passed and now he was big. And all those baby venuses were almost as big as he was.



And then one day, there was a loud buzzing: Beetles!



He looked at Iris. She was covered with beetles! They were eating her!!



The boy widened his traps and squeezed really hard so lots of the attractive dew sat in the traps.



And it worked! A beetle jumped off Iris and right onto his trap. Snap! Dinner is served.



But there were still beetles, lots of beetles, all over Iris. He didn't care that she had been scared of him. He loved her. He really wanted to save her.



But what could he do? The beetles had chewed big holes in Iris's leaves and were making more holes, faster and faster.



She was starting to wilt.  He had to think of something, and fast!.



He thought and he thought. And then he noticed the other flytraps. Yes!



Even though flytraps find it very hard to speak, love makes almost anything possible. So he tried to speak but, alas, all that came out was digested beetle!



He tried again. More digested beetle!



He tried yet again and, finally, words came out: "Please help me save my Iris!"



But the other flytraps didn't move.



"Please!," he cried.



Still the flytraps remained still.



He screamed, "I love her more than life itself."



And that awakened Venus the God of Love and all of a sudden, all the flytraps squeezed as hard as they could so their traps would open as wide as they could and so lots of attractive dew appeared on their traps.



And like a magnet,  the beetles jumped into the traps. Well, most of them.



Exhausted, all the other flytraps fell asleep.



But three beetles were still left on Iris. Now what?!



He couldn't eat them himself. He had just eaten one and remembered what his mama warned him: "Eat more than one in a day and you'll die."



But the boy looked at Iris and he knew what he had to do.



He squeezed harder than he ever had in his entire life.



And then he squeezed some more.



And all his traps opened the widest they'd ever been, even wider than you do when the doctor says, "Say ah!"



And all the traps were completely covered with that glistening, attractive dew.



And just like that, the three beetles jumped from Iris and into his traps. Snap. Snap. Snap.



The boy looked at Iris. And he was happy.



And this time, she did not look away. She leaned toward him.



And the boy was very happy.



But then the boy felt sick.



And he wondered, "Should I have eaten those beetles?"



And then he melted into the earth and joined his mama.



Would you have eaten the beetles?

Do You Have What it Takes to Be Self-Employed?

It's hard to land a job, so more people are turning to self-employment. But are you cut out to run your own business?



My USNews.com article today is a quiz, a self-inventory: Do You Have What it Takes to Be Self-Employed?