Bart "J.B." Hopkins's Blog, page 31

An Old Favorite

Okay.  I have nothing of value today.  Just going to share this link to the Double Rainbow guy.  Oh, man, it’s so stupid yet so funny.

DOUBLE RAINBOW

Brush With Death?

Life is full of ups and downs…

We returned from five wonderful days in Ireland last Monday.  Five days of beautiful countryside, fantastic sights, and friendly people.  

Definitely one of those ups in life.



Tuesday morning, I was back in action: work and real life.  But, I came pretty close to death that day.  Have you ever had a near-death experience?


Luckily, I was at the hospital, in the allergy clinic.  Of course, that could be considered part of the problem, I guess, but here’s the tale…

 
I had gone in to get my weekly allergy shots.  With a gradual increase in dosage, over time, my immunity and resilience to certain allergens is supposed to increase.  My son has had great results from his allergy shots; he is a year ahead of me in the program.


After you get these shots, they make you hang out for half an hour in the waiting room.  Bad reactions generally occur within those first 30 minutes.  I’ve been to the allergy clinic about 60 times for myself and my son over the last two years.  Neither of us have ever had a reaction to the shots, though my son has had four or five very serious reactions out in real life.  I’ve never seen anyone else have any problems either.

 
So, I got my shots, one in each arm, and made my next appointment while I put on my military blouse.  As I walked out of the “shot room,” a female walked in for her turn.
 
In the hallway I realized that I felt a little fuzzy.  I wondered briefly, as I walked, if I had just exerted myself in some way, being silly or something.  I felt ever-so-slightly out of breath.  And lightheaded.  This all transpired over a matter of seconds while I continued on to the waiting room.

 
Once there I paused again.  The room was surprisingly empty and this time I was pretty certain I was having a reaction in my body.  I decided to sit down…I figured it would pass…I’ve had reactions before, right?  And they always pass.

 
After about a minute I realized my face felt prickly, my jaw and cheeks were tingling.  My heart felt like it was really starting to move.  When I looked down and saw my shirt bouncing outward, about an inch from my chest with each beat, I knew I was in trouble.  I stood up and told the receptionist, “I think I’m having a reaction.”
 
She leapt out of her chair and ran to the shot room: no kidding around.  I followed.  I watched as she hammered on the door of the room I had been in less than five minutes before, and the technician opened it.  The technician’s eyes widened when she saw me…dramatically widened.  That scared me a bit.  I had no idea what I looked like.  She leaned out and screamed down the hall, “DOCTOR SMITH!!!”
 
Then she bluntly told her patient, the female who had followed me, to leave.


That’s when I saw myself in the mirror; I looked like a cherry: deeply red.


The doc ran in and they told me to sit down.  I tried to ask if I should take off my shirt, but I was loopy and very lightheaded.  They grabbed my EpiPens, took one, and jabbed it into my left leg.  One of them started a watch, keeping time.


EpiPens are syringes packed with epinephrine that I carry around in case of an emergency.


There were three people around me by then…running vitals and such.  At some point I had removed my outer shirt, but I don’t remember doing it.  I told the doctor I was starting to have trouble breathing.  She asked if I was wheezing; she asked if my chest or neck was tight.  I said I didn’t know, maybe all of them.

 
The doctor proclaimed loudly a couple of times for the technicians to get the oxygen and albuterol treatment ready.  I was getting worse.


I told the doctor I was starting to really have trouble breathing.  It was becoming labor, getting air in and out.

 
The doctor checked the time.  I was supposed to be improving, but I wasn’t.  She grabbed my other EpiPen and stabbed it into my right leg.  Checked vitals.  Asked how I was.  My head felt fuzzy and swollen.  It was hard to give any verbal answers.

 
I told the doctor I couldn’t breathe.  It was a Herculean effort to pull in each breath.  It was the most difficult thing I’ve ever done, just pulling in the smallest little sips of air.  But I didn’t have the air to tell her all of that.  It ran through my mind that I might have to give up, that I just couldn’t keep it up, this effort.  I pleaded with them: “ I can’t breathe! “

 
They squirted epinephrine and albuterol into a cup connected to plastic tubes that were affixed to an oxygen tank.  They told me to breathe.  They gave me two prednisone pills and a zyrtec; it all lodged in my swollen throat.  Those tiny pills lodged!  There was no room to go down the narrow passage which was now my throat.

 
Finally I felt just the smallest give.  My heart started easing up just a little bit.  I was drenched in sweat.  My face felt a little less foreign.  It had been about 35 minutes since the reaction started.
 
My breathing gradually returned.  I normally blow about 450 on the flowmeter.  At 45 minutes I blew 190.  My body was taking in 94% oxygen my first few minutes on the O2 machine.  Another hour and I was up to 400 and 96%.

 
The doctor said it was a very severe reaction.  This would be one of those downs in life.
 
Anyway, I’m okay now.  I felt very weak the rest of that day and I slept well that night.

 
It’s just crazy though…I’ve never felt so out of control in my life.  In the middle of the madness I thought about my boy…how he must feel, just a little guy, going through the bad reactions he has had.  It made me feel connected to him and scared for him.


And scared for me.  Heck, I want to live a few more decades.  It’s given me a lot to think about the last few days, about what is truly important in life, where I really need to apply my focus.  So, anyway…that was my (maybe) brush with the other side.

I tell you with nothing less than incredible joy…not yet…not yet!

—-BART—–

Jon Messenger’s Burden of Sisyphus

It takes a lot of work to be an Indie Author these days.

Even with that hard work, and a generous application of patience, it can still take a long time to be discovered and build a following. People simply don’t know which books to choose amid the million or so available out there.

And, that’s a shame, because there are good writers out there who should be discovered by more readers; Jon Messenger is one of them.

Jon and I both have short stories that were published in Paranormal Anthology With a Twist. We don’t know each other very well, but I enjoyed his story TRUTH OR DARE (my favorite of that book), and decided I would give one of his full-length novels a try.

Perpetually busy with work, family, and life…it took me a few months…but I finally found some time and read Burden of Sisyphus.

The first 2-3 chapters were decent. I liked the ideas, but the setting and some of the character interactions didn’t appeal to me. Maybe because it had a very minor YA feel to it…I’m not sure.

I kept reading though, and soon enough, I found I had really gotten into the story and the majority of the characters. Sure, there are battles and some military-centric scenes, but they aren’t overbearing. They work perfectly for the story, much as some battles in Star Wars work perfectly for it, but I wouldn’t think of Star Wars as “primarily” a military movie…it’s just a great story.

The characters are great; they’re real and quirky and imperfect.

The plot is good, the pace is good, and there are some surprises in store for the reader. It gets better and better through the book.

As others have said, if you like the Sci-Fi and military blend, this is the book for you. But…I don’t think that does this book justice, because I think it has the potential for mass appeal; it’s got a little bit of everything…greed, honor, friendship, coming-of-age, heroism, and a little romance.

Burden is a really good book, a good story, worthy of acclaim…I look forward to reading the next in the series!

San Francisco Book Review: Texas Jack

The San Francisco & Sacramento Book Review gave Texas Jack a glowing 5-star review!

Some excerpts:

“Reading Texas Jack is a beautiful experience.”

“…the narrative voice is so conversational and friendly that the book feels more like an intense discussion with a friend than your typical dramatic tale.”

“…characters are all convincingly brought to life…”

“…a quick, powerful, and entertaining read.  I highly recommend it.”

CLICK HERE TO READ FULL REVIEW & LIKE IT ON FACEBOOK

I’m going to sit back, relax, and enjoy this moment because every connection I make with a reader keeps my passion for writing alive in this world where spare moments for this guy are on the endangered species list.

As always, my eternal thanks to all that have supported me…

STALKER

Coming soon…

Stalkers: A Collection of Thriller Stories

A collection of tales that will have you looking over your shoulder…

Everyone loves a good STALKER story, right? And…you guessed it, I have a short story included in the mix.

Doesn’t that cover want to make you grab a copy?  I mean, look at those nasty, filthy hands covering her face…I guess you never know what’s lurking around the corner.  It certainly isn’t a fairy princess or unicorn.

Here’s the line-up:

Don’t Kiss the Dead Fred by A.E. Killingsworth 

Lucid by Andrea Stanet 

Donations by Bart Hopkins

Bernice by Chad Foutz

Destination: Death by Eaton Thomas Palmer

Autumn by Elizabeth Collins

Dead Ringer by Jason Brant

Freezer Burn by Jon Messenger

Powerless by Laurie Treacy

The Watcher by Lindy Spencer 

Immortal Luck by Magen McMinimy

Say My Name by Michael Loring

Damaged People by Nicki Scalise

Izzy’s Assassin by Nicole Clark

Blog Stalker by Phil Taylor 

Every Thorn by Rene Folsom

Affliction by S.L. Dearing

A huge thanks to the two ladies behind the curtain, turning the cranks, making it happen:

CYNTHIA SHEPP and RENE FOLSOM!

I’ll send out another line when it’s available…don’t forget to get your copy and find your next favorite author!

Almost 40

Another birthday has come and gone and I’m officially almost 40.  The day itself was okay; I was at work for most of it.  I think that, in an organization of over 100 people, I’m something like the 5th oldest.  It seems like just yesterday I was always the youngest and sometimes I’m not sure how that changed so rapidly, how everything reversed itself, and now I’m middle-aged.

My wife and munchkins made everything awesome once I clocked out and came home.  Well, they did before work, too.  My youngest climbed into bed next to me, early in the morning, so she could “be the first to tell me happy birthday.”  When I stop and think about that, about how her little heart and mind led her to want to do that for me, well, I just can’t think of anything cooler.  And, as it turns out, all my kids wanted to “be the first” so that’s just too cool; I’m a really lucky guy.

Ha ha, and then later I had to break up the argument my kids were having over who actually was the first to tell me happy birthday.  They all claimed it.  Ha ha ha ha…they’re all so funny.

Exercising is harder, clothes are a little tighter, and there are new wrinkles around my eyes.  It’s strange, getting older, but in some ways life is better, too.  You learn to really appreciate the good things–you aren’t worried about as many of the silly things.

But, hey, what am I talking about.  I’m still in my 30′s…I’m still hip…and I don’t think my kids’ friends are making fun of me (yet).  Bigger, better, stronger, power, right?

Hope everyone on the other end of these electrons has a peaceful day…

Ciao

A Medieval Fest

We went to a medieval fest in Freisen on Saturday.  Two things almost always pop into my mind when I hear the word medieval:

1) The scene in Cable Guy where Matthew Broderick is at the Medieval Times restaurant and asks his waitress (played by Janeane Garofolo) for silverware…

Broderick (Steven): Can I get a knife or fork?

Garofolo: There were no utensils in medieval times, therefore there are no utensils AT medieval times.  Would you like a refill on your Pepsi?

Broderick: There were no utensils but there was Pepsi?

Garofolo: Dude, I’ve got a lot of tables.

2) The second thing I think of is Marsellus Wallace in Pulp Fiction saying that he’s going to get medieval on someone’s buttocks.

In between listening to me say, “dude, I’ve got a lot of tables” and chuckling, my family and I had a pretty good time.

My daughter got to hold a large owl:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My younger kids had a duel.

 

 

 

 

 

My boy tested his mettle.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And, we watched the German musicians play some medieval tunes laced with bits from modern stuff, which really cracked me up.  CLICK HERE TO WATCH THAT!

 

And, so ended another day in Germany.

Good afternoon, Good Evening, and Good Knight!

 

 

Perception & The Matrix

My son and I are watching The Matrix and we’ve come to the part where Neo goes to see the Oracle.

The Oracle and Neo talk together in the kitchen.  The Oracle is smoking.  So, my son says, “I’m surprised she’s alive since she smokes.”

I told him, “Well, smoking doesn’t kill you instantly…it takes time.”

He replied, “But, Dad, she’s so old!”

Me: “How old do you think the Oracle is?”

My son: “80 or 90 years old.”

I just chuckled quietly to myself.  To my 9-year-old boy, his perception from very young eyes, is that this woman is ancient, 80 or 90!!

“80 or 90, huh?”

“Yeah, Dad.  But I guess it depends on when she started, so never mind.”

I think the Oracle was probably closer to 55 or so in the movie.  It’s funny to me that my son sees her as so much older; it makes me wonder if I saw the world that way when I was his age.  I probably did.

How old do you think she is?

 

 

 

 

Random

My 12-year-old daughter just informed me that she could never be “royalty” if it required waking up early.

“You look somewhat familiar…have I threatened you before?”

80% of the Hopkins Five are watching Pirates of The Caribbean this morning, right now, taking inspiration from Jack Sparrow and the rest.  The other 20% of the family is off slinging books at the library, feeding the needs of the community.

“You cheated…”

“Pirate!”

This actually gives me a hankering to go to Disney.

Does everyone love Disney as much as my family?  We’re huge fans.

Time for me to make lunch for the wild bunch.

Some final wisdom from Jack Sparrow: ”Sticks and Stones, love!”

 

A Thousand Splendid Suns

I really enjoyed The Kite Runner, so I was eager to get my hands on A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini.

My opinion: it’s a good book, but not as good as The Kite Runner. Let me throw some thoughts out at you, but per my norm, this won’t be a standard review. You can find a gajillion of those already.

On a strange note, I think that some people will find this book better than The Kite Runner, not because the writing is any better, but simply because TKR had a pretty vulgar, vile event that initiated a change in the characters’ behavior. If you’re one of those people and know what I’m talking about, give this book a try…you may like it more than his others.

The prose is really good, not great. And the themes are good, not great. It kept my attention, it stirred my emotions, and I enjoyed it.

The story is set in Afghanistan, which is where his other two novels take place. While I have taken pleasure in discovering some of those small details of Afghan life that I would otherwise never have known about, I also would like to see him branch out a little bit, try a new locale. Oh, well, he has time for that later…I’d say for now he has cornered the market on what he’s got going.

Some people complain if a book is too happy, that it isn’t realistic. You won’t have that problem here. We’ve got plenty of abuse and misfortunes and injustice to go around. Of course, if you are the opposite end of the spectrum of readers, and want a perfect and happy ending, well, I don’t want to give it away…read it and make your own decisions.

The characters are solidly developed, some that you love, and some you will hate.

I’ll tell you what shocked me and it’s not even directly related to Khaled Hosseini’s writing. It’s that 4,000 of his 400,000 reviews on Goodreads are 1-star reviews. What? Really? I don’t see how that’s possible. Are you telling me there were no redeeming qualities whatsoever in the novel? Ludicrous and absurd. It may not be the superstar quality of the first book, but still good.

It’s a good thing I don’t blindly listen to the people who leave 1-star reviews, or I would miss out on a lot of good books! I know that reviewers aren’t professionals. I’m not; most people aren’t. All I mean by that is that people are emotionally driven and they aren’t trained to write reviews. One bad joke, or not fitting the narrow mold of one’s tastes, or writing in first person, or not containing an element of romance, or having a couple that is “too in love,” or a thousand other silly things can make a reviewer drop a 1-star rating. Really, really take the bad reviews with a grain of salt.

But, I digress…right?

Hosseini did a fine job with A Thousand Splendid Suns. He’s well on his way to establishing himself as an author that reliably enchants us with beautiful tales and rich characters.  I look forward to his next novel.