Jessica Aviva's Blog, page 20

The Privilege of Relationships

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Excerpt from Whole Happy and Healthy: A Revolutionary Approach to Understanding and Thriving with Mental Illness http://amzn.to/2mUjVRK

Filed under: Whole Happy and Healthy Tagged: control, relationships

Choosing to Respond

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Excerpt from Whole Happy and Healthy: A Revolutionary Approach to Understanding and Thriving with Mental Illness http://amzn.to/2mUjVRK

Filed under: Whole Happy and Healthy Tagged: conceptions, empathy, listening, mental health, responsiveness, sharing

The Hallway of Life

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Excerpt from Whole Happy and Healthy: A Revolutionary Approach to Understanding and Thriving with Mental Illness http://amzn.to/2mUjVRK

Filed under: Whole Happy and Healthy Tagged: mental health

Expanding Our Emotional Framework

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Excerpt from Whole Happy and Healthy: A Revolutionary Approach to Understanding and Thriving with Mental Illness http://amzn.to/2mUjVRK

Filed under: Whole Happy and Healthy Tagged: emotions, feelings, mental health

Opening Up to Possibilities

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Excerpt from Whole Happy and Healthy: A Revolutionary Approach to Understanding and Thriving with Mental Illness http://amzn.to/2mUjVRK

 

Filed under: Uncategorized

My Sensitivity http://amzn.to/2mUjVRK ht

My Sensitivity http://amzn.to/2mUjVRK http://ow.ly/i/sFM9o

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40 for 40: All the Rest

Last year, I made a pact with a fellow friend, who shared with me the momentous occasion of turning 40, to do 40 things to celebrate this life event. I further pledged to do one more thing every year, a total of 41 things to mark my 41st birthday, etc., in future years.

As the lack of posts on this topic demonstrates, I have somewhat abandoned this approach to marking my year. Any undertaking truly worthy of turning 40 would likely be too private to fully write about on this blog, and the list seemed like a chore rather than a celebration.

So instead, I am focusing my attention on living in the moment and being grateful for the opportunity to continue doing so day after day. It is these virtues that will enable me to get the most out of what will surely continue to be a splendid year. Rather than checking items off of a list, I am generating new interpretations of my life which enrich it beyond measure.

Filed under: 40 for 40, Mindfulness Tagged: gratitude

Autumn Routines

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The first day of school was always a day met, for me, with both eager anticipation and deep despair. While it was a joy to get dressed up, as we did in those days, head out early on brisk mornings, and get back into a routine it also marked the end of carefree summer days.

Autumn has been a bit late this year. More than two days this past week have been in the 70s, an anomaly given the typical continental weather in the Pennsylvania community where I live. As we have sadly realized, global warming is throwing off the delicate balance of nature in so many ways. Although I admit I have enjoyed not wearing a jacket for just a few days longer, I am terrified for our planet, for her sustainability and viability in years that will stretch out beyond my own.

Despite the warm weather, I have been reminiscing about those early fall days of my youth, and remembering how this season compels me to ritually adopt certain routines that for some reason seem most welcome at this time of year. Like the giant trees that gently allow their leaves to return to the earth, I am letting go of things that have an expired meaningful purpose in my life. Things that are unnecessary, a nuisance. Internally, I am letting go of thoughts and feelings that weigh me down, allowing them to fall away from my life. After an almost too comfortable summer, I am re-establishing habits to improve my health and well-being. Life feels crisp, fresh, and breezy.

Autumn is now about halfway gone, and soon winter will arrive. Cold, snuggly days sipping warmth and longing for sunshine. I’m clearing my space to prepare for the pristine emptiness of our next earthly phase.

Filed under: Wellness Tagged: cleaning, emptiness, global warming, habits, letting go, ritual, routines, seasons, space

Rediscovering the Library

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As a young woman, I spent a lot of time in the library. It was more than a place to kill a few hours every day in-between school and work; it was a magical place where all things were possible.

But lately, I have gotten out of the habit of visiting these local treasures. Enrolling in a Ph.D. program interrupted any leisure reading I might have enjoyed for several years and since (temporarily but for what is becoming a more extended time than I originally anticipated) disenrolling, I have, for some reason, not been voraciously reading as I had been in the past. While I still enjoy good books and articles, and read when I can, I often find myself too tired at night when I snuggle into bed to read and too busy during the day to take the time. I also spend much too much time at work in front of a computer so using my eyes to read text above and beyond that time is sometimes undesirable.

I recently visited three local libraries as part of a history research project. I have been to all three countless times before, as I have lived in all three cities, but had not stepped foot in any of them more than once or twice over the past few years. I felt that magic feeling again, a mixture of possibility, stillness, intellectual stimulation, and safety. It is an environment beautifully calibrated with my soul, a place where I feel right at home. According to the 2015 State of America’s Libraries: A Report from the American Library Association, Americans see libraries as “anchors, centers for academic life and research, and cherished spaces.” Yes, that’s it.

Libraries fill my heart with joy and my mind with wisdom. Like my home, the beach, and farms, they are one of the places where I feel most at ease, inspired, and alive. The last time I visited a library. a toddler was screaming and crying after story time because he didn’t want to leave. I couldn’t have said it better myself.

Filed under: Community Tagged: comfort, curiosity, inspiration, learning, library, possibility, wisdom

40 for 40 #11: Self-Acceptance

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The first ten things on my 40 for 40 list were actions I took — places I went, things I purchased, etc. And there will be more of those on the list later this year. But there have also been many internal changes occurring during this hallmark year. Some of them are temporary, like the nagging sensation that I have limited time left in this lifetime to experience everything that I desire. But others have been more positive and, hopefully, sustainable.

One of these is self-acceptance. This has always been a struggle for me, and as such it is an aspect of myself in which I have invested a lot of reflection and intention. I am starting to feel an internal shift occurring. Perhaps it is related to the passage of time, an evolution of who I am with a cumulative impact. It could also be that reaching this milestone in my life has triggered something that would otherwise not naturally occur.

I’m starting to feel OK with who I am; I no longer feel that I am in desperate need of being fixed. I have realized that to be happy, I have to accept — and appreciate — myself and my circumstances as they are right now. I have not become complacent, and I have not given up on pursing all of my dreams. Rather, I have minimized obsessing over the consequences that may or may not occur as a result of my being in the world and the achievements that I may or may not accomplish. I have started to realize that every thing I feel, think, and do matters and has an impact whether it is realized now or at some time in the future. I have cultivated patience and compassion for myself which expand outward as I interact with others. I see other, younger, people struggling to come to terms with who they are and I understand because I have been there. But I am no longer there myself.

Filed under: Uncategorized Tagged: acceptance, achievement, compassion, dreams, patience