C. Lee McKenzie's Blog, page 90

Monday Miscellany

The biggest Miscellany this Monday is that I'm leaving for Amsterdam this afternoon, and this will be my only post for a couple of weeks--unless something spectacular happens in Amsterdam and I can't wait to tell you. I'll be back to my regular Monday-Thursday posts by the 27th. Enshala.



But there's more. I have to keep up with my ROW80 writers who are truly spectacular. Please join the effort or go over the Linky and find those hard working people. Give them a boost and a hug--cyber is fine. Also don't forget my special YALitChat ROW80 writers. Drop in and say hi and tell them they will make their goals. Everyone needs a bit of encouragement Sheri Larson, Susan Kaye Quinn, and Margo Berendsen.



My goals for this week are to Enjoy, Enjoy. Enjoy. Read. Read. Read.



My last Miscellany is about last week's edgy YA clash with Megan Cox Gurdon when she wrote this  article for the Wall Street Journal  Here's the link if you happened to miss it. Rebuttals poured in and I'm sure there are more than the ones I'm listing here, but these were the early responses.

Laurie Halse AndersonThe Guardian; The Guardian again.Cheryl RainfieldYes,  This Will be on the TestSpeak EasyType Faster

I didn't respond with an article, but I did chime in on the #YASaves Tweets. My view is that parents, teachers and librarians should read any book they're prepared to hand over to a young reader. If it's offensive, they have a right to say so, but I think they need to check out the real world that their teens inhabit. Some of these books are tame by comparison to reality.



Writers should be able to write what they want but never lose sight of the power these books have with teens. This is a huge responsibility and I take it seriously when I'm writing. I don't think my books will ever be banned, and I don't want that to happen. I want them to be read. I want the stories to create awareness of these social issues among readers, especially those parents, teachers and librarians who might be in a position to help a troubled teen.



I didn't write about cutting and suicide to encourage destructive behavior. I wrote about it because I hate that kids cut themselves. I hate that teens even think about suicide, but the fact is they do and some "succeed" in taking their own lives. I find that horrifying, and so I  crafted a story that shows "It only gets better."  At least, that's what I hoped readers would find.

Now on to my vacation. I'm taking a break from angsty books and heading out. Sliding on the Edge, C. Lee McKenzie, WestSide Books, Spring '09

In The Throes of Thursday--What I've Learned About Writing Novels_6

What's in a name? 

That question is pretty famous, and I often think of it when I'm trying to find a name for one of my stories. What I soon discovered was that I was really bad at titles. I knew I needed help, so I started by looking at books that were on the shelves and, most importantly, either selling well or enjoying the status of a classic.

Here are a few from own bookshelves--some new, some the classics we love.



Insatiable. The Secret Life of BeesThe Body FinderAl Capone Does My ShirtsThe Devil's ArithmeticCatcher in the RyeTo Kill a MockingbirdRed Badge of CourageA Moveable Feast

So what made these titles stand out, grab the reader? Why did they work? What did I learn from them?

Each one immediately made me curious. I wanted to know who was insatiable and about what; secrets  instantly intrigue me and who on earth would WANT to find bodies? Al Capone doing laundry--that's something I had to find out about, and anything about the devil gets my attention, especially since I have to know what kind of math this dude could possibly do. You get what I'm saying. Each of these titles made me want to find out what was inside that cover.

A couple of these were metaphors and those always capture the imagination. I mean, how do grapes and wrath have anything to do with each other? And a feast that moves? What's that about?

What I learned from this little bit of research is that if a title isn't compelling, the book has a major strike against it.

Here are some books that started with one title and ended with another. Can you guess what they were published as?

The Mute ...................................................................The Heart is a Lonely HunterPrivate Flemming, His Various Battles......................The Red Badge of CourageTo Climb the Wall.....................................................The Blackboard JungleHurray for the Red, White and Blue..........................The Great Gatsby

How do you choose your titles when you write? How important are titles to you when you're buying a book?Sliding on the Edge, C. Lee McKenzie, WestSide Books, Spring '09

Monday Miscellany

My Monday Miscellany is becoming more and more miscellaneous. I guess that's the point.



So here I am, showing up and still not showing up. Very funny moment captured by CAPTAINSTUPENDOUS.





As to my ROW80 this week, I'm beginning to get the hang of this goal setting; now I have to get the hang of meeting those goals. Last Weeks Goals weren't too tough, but I still fell a tad short.



1. Finish the short story for 2009 Debs Ebook anthology.

YES! I DID THIS. IT'S DONE. IT'S READY TO GO. HOPE TO HAVE A COVER TO SHARE WITH ALL OF YOU SOON.



2. Write at least 1,000 words on my WIP.

OOPS! I DIDN'T QUITE MAKE THIS, BUT I IMPROVED ON ABOUT 1,000 WORDS. DO I GET AT LEAST MY E FOR EFFORT?



3. Find the top of my desk.

I DID IT! THEN I LOST IT AGAIN THE NEXT DAY. CAN I KEEP PUTTING THIS AS A GOAL EACH WEEK?



4. Find that pair of Sexy Butt Jeans that Kait Nolan, another ROW80 blogger, just reminded me I should be wearing.



I FOUND THEM, BUT MAYBE IT WASN'T A GOOD IDEA.



To join this highly motivated ROW80 group, click here and add your blog to the LinkyTool.  Also be sure to stop in and say high to those who have already joined, especially my YALitChat ROWERS who are writing like crazy. Sheri Larson, Susan Kaye Quinn, Margo Berendsen Sliding on the Edge, C. Lee McKenzie, WestSide Books, Spring '09

In the Throes of Thursday--What I've Learned About Writing Novels_5

At a Fast Pace or how to keep people reading your story.

1. Short sentences. Short paragraphs.



One way to step up the pace is with short sentences in dialogue. Here's a very short conversation between two of Pam Bachorz's characters in Drought.



     "Does it work?" he asks, glancing at the tree.

     Relief, sweet and cold, unties my mouth. He's not discovered

my blood's secret, not really.

     "It works," I answer.

     "I hate seeing you hurt." He bends, slightly, and drops the

faintest kiss on the scratch.

     "I'll heal," I tell him. Gently I slide my arm away. I rub

the spot where he kissed it--it's still tingling.

     "Look. I have an idea," Ford says. I can smell him: the metal-

lic gtang of sweat, but that clean smell too, the one that makes me

want to bury my face in his shirt.

     "This can't happen," I tell him.

     "Just give me five minutes. Two minutes, even," he begs.

     "Just . . . just one," I say. He's so hard for me to resist.

"Run away with me. Please. I can get you far away from here," Ford says.





This is a great, fast-paced fight scene from Insatiable by Meg Cabot. Check out the way the author uses just very short sentences and a lot of paragraphing to make the scene race to the end.



      Lucien's glance shifted away from his brother and toward her.

     And when their gazes me, Meena felt something like an explosive

charge go off inside her head.

     She could see in his eyes how much he loved her.

     And how hard it was for him not to kill his brother then and there,

with his bare hands, for what Dimitri had done to her.

     But he couldn't. Not yet.



2. A lot of times I find myself overwriting, giving too much information when I want the story to MOVE. I get as much down as I can, and then go back and take out anything that I don't need.





I'm so bored with this book.
SLOOOOW SHE GOES:

     Starting at the rail station, Hitchcock retraced his steps, head down, searching. The coin had to be along the path he'd traveled from the post office, across the square and down Railroad Avenue. It has only been minutes since he'd discovered his good luck piece missing. He had to find it and he was sure to  if he was careful and thorough.



NOW THIS IS MORE LIKE IT:

     Hitchcock, head down, searching retraced his steps. He'd find his good luck piece; he had to.



3. Some scenes just don't have to be in the story. When you find one that you can let your reader imagine, take it out. That will pick up the pace.



     One man stepped into the pool of light that came from a bare bulb next to the alley door.; then another. This one held a knife and circled around him, slicing the air. He backed away, feeling for the bricks so no others could come at him from behind.

     "Okay," Murphy said, wrapping his coat around one arm ready to take them on. "Let's get this over."



     Charlotte glanced at her watch. Late again, she thought. Why did she stay in this relationship with Murphy Cocoran. If he stood her up one more time . . . .



The missing scene leaves the reader in suspense, wanting to know if Murphy will whip those two thugs and keep his date with Charlotte or not. The fight scene isn't as important as the increased pace generated by skipping it is. Depending on what you decide about Murphy's fate, you can fill in whatever details are necessary without showing that scene.



4. Think movies and use what they do to keep the story jetting across the screen.



Let's say a sailor is about to be Shanghaied. You see him sitting at a seedy bar near the docks, hanging out with some unsavory characters. (Okay, so I'm out of original ideas.) The next scene is him waking up below decks of a ship, on his way to wherever. That's a jump all right, but one that the audience understands and one that moves the story ahead real fast.



Here's how it would look in my not so original novel.



Murphy (poor guy) tossed back the last of his pint and swiped his mouth with the back of his hand. "See you, mates," he said, staggering toward the door.

The three sailors looked at each other, nodded and followed Murphy out.



Murphy sat up, his head throbbing. "Where in the hell . . . ."

"Welcome aboard, mate."



As always if I've left out something or if you think I don't know what the heck I'm talking about, let me know. This is the last week of my series, What I've Learned About Writing. I'm trying to think of another series to start next week. Scratches head and pours wine. Idea are appreciated.Sliding on the Edge, C. Lee McKenzie, WestSide Books, Spring '09

Monday Miscellany

This is truly a MISCELLANY: My ROW80 goals for the week. 
Mike Jung & Nan Marino. 
Veterans' Day.
Next Post: In The Throes of Thursday I'll share what I've learned about PACING.



#ROW80 

Last week didn't produce the results I'd hoped for in my ROW80 challenge. Truth? It didn't produce anything I'd set out for myself. I'm still at around 41,000+ words with some scenes that are looking for a reason to exist. I doubt they'll find it. Still I'm not giving up. Here's my goals for next week:





1. Finish the short story for 2009 Debs Ebook anthology.

2. Write at least 1,000 words on my WIP.

3. Find the top of my desk.

4. Find that pair of Sexy Butt Jeans that Kait Nolan, another ROW80 blogger, just reminded me I should be wearing.





Do you want to join this highly motivated ROW80 group? Click here and add your blog to the LinkyTool.  Also be sure to stop in and say high to those who have already joined, especially my YALitChat compadres who are writing like crazy. Sheri Larson, Susan Kaye Quinn, Margo Berendsen





MR. BLOGGY WOGGY AND ME





Mike Jung gave a great presentation about Social Media on Saturday. One of the best comments he made was that in building an authors' network on the media, it's more important to remember you're connecting with people than it is to create a BRAND identity. Thanks, Mike. I needed that.








Mike, Me and One of Our Favorite Books by Nan Marino




Me: I Want This Book. Mike: No Way.





Ann Nesbet and Me--Remind me where I put my glasses.







Remembering my dad today and my grandfather--both veterans--both people who sacrificed a lot for their country, but never complained. Remembering all of the veterans and giving thanks for what they've done to keep us free.

Sliding on the Edge, C. Lee McKenzie, WestSide Books, Spring '09

In The Throes of Thursday--What I've Learned About Writing Novels_4

As if the world isn't already TENSE enough what withjust surviving another Rapture, today I'm going to focus on creating tension with dialogue. And I'm going to use a couple of plays as examples since they are great sources. Without tense dialogue the audience falls into a stupor.


In a Stupor
Here's a little bit from Edward Albee's Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf--there are four characters in the room during this exchange--a young couple, Nick and his wife as well as George and Martha, the seasoned combatants.See if you feel just a touch of tension.
NICK (Peers at Martha)
Your eyes are ... brown, aren't they?
MARTHAGreen! (A little too fast) Well, in some lights they look brown but they're green. Not like his . . . more hazel. George has watery blue eyes. . . milky blue.
GEORGEMake up your mind, Martha.
MARTHAI was giving you the benefit of the doubt. (Now back to the others) Daddy has green eyes, too.
GEORGE He does not! Your father has tiny red eyes...like a white mouse. In fact, he is a white mouse.
MARTHAYou wouldn't dare say a thing like that if he was here! You're a coward!
Can you picture the other two people in the room with George and Martha? In the audience, I was cringing. What sharp spear of a word would they hurl at each other next?
Now, here's a small of bit of classic dialogue tension. The audience knows what Iago is up to and watches as he starts to weave his web of suspicion to trap Othello
IAGOMy Noble lord,--
OTHELLOWhat dost thou say, Iago?
IAGODid Michael Cassio, when you woo'd my lady, Know of your love?
OTHELLOHe did, from first to last: why dost thou ask?
IAGOBut for a satisfaction of my thought;No further harm.
OTHELLOWhy of thy thought,Iago?
IAGOI did not think he had been acquainted with her.
OTHELLOO,yes; and went between us very oft.
IAGOIndeed!
OTHELLOIndeed! ay, indeed" discern'st thou aught in that?Is he not honest?
IAGOHonest, my lord!
Notice that in these very different examples there are some similarities:
The language is lean. No fat, but lots of sub-text in each one. Martha choose the very unflattering adjectives, milky and watery, to describe George's eye color. 
Iago chooses the single word, indeed, which I guess you could translate as, "foolish dupe." He then repeats Othello's word, honest, implying, "whatever!"
The words themselves seem pretty innocent, but their meaning isn't and that's what the reader picks up. That's what creates the tension. 
Here are a couple of earlier post about dialogue if you'd like to see them. 
Back to Basics i
Back to Basics ii
As always I really love your comments. If you have a great example or want to add to what I've shared, please do. I learn so much from my readers.Sliding on the Edge, C. Lee McKenzie, WestSide Books, Spring '09

Monday Miscellany

Last week I went to San Francisco to the CBS studios to do an interview on Bay Sunday. It was great to  meet the host, Sydnie Kohara, and the producer, Akilah Bolden-Monifa. And I shared the set with the It Gets Better Project; Michael "Puck" Quinn, Artistic Director for The Blue Man Group; head of MYX TV Miguel Santos and blogger Allyn Hoang.

 All kinds of Irresistibly Sweet Things happened at the same time last week. The Interview and then a wonderful Blog Award from Kip Wilson Rechea.

Now who to pass this on to?Lisa Gail Green is an *IST, so she gets one.Kelly Hashaway falls into that category too.Sheri Larson, my ROW80 pard.Susan Kaye Quinn, of course, another ROW80 writer.Margo Brendersen who writes anywhere, but mostly at High Altitude and lot since she signed on for ROW80.I'm also going to send this north to Alaska to Paul. His blog is definitely Irrestible.Theresa Milstein has to have one of these from me too.Seven things about moi! 1. I'm a rural bumpkin and I love it.2. If there's a choice between the ocean and a lake, the ocean wins.3. I once thought about acting as a career. (Sheesh!)4. Fish ponds fascinate me. Well, not the ponds, but the fish. What do they "think" about all day down in that water?5. I'm a hugely field dependent learner--have to force myself to move on without knowing "everything" or I never get anywhere with research.6. Crosswords are relaxing.7. Don't ever get me started on a jig saw puzzle, or dinner won't happen.

*Irresistibly Sweet ThingNext Throes of Thursday will be about TENSION again, but how to get it in dialog. Hope to see you here.



Sliding on the Edge, C. Lee McKenzie, WestSide Books, Spring '09

In the Throes of Thursday--What I've Learned About Writing Novels_3

Tension. What the heck is that anyway and why would you want to add it to your story?



By definition, tension is the nervous feeling you get when you're reading or watching something very exciting or frightening. It's what keeps you turning the page of a book or staying awake during a movie.  No tension=



Readers love tension (not to be confused with suspense--a whole other thingy) and writers have to give it to them. So how can we do that?



1) Set up a situation where there's friction between characters and hold it for a while, then let it go.



     "You! Get out here where I can see you. Now."

     The auditorium fell to a hush as one security guard flipped open his holster and pulled out his gun. The other stood in front of the orchestra pit, signaling everyone to remain seated and quiet.

     The curtain moved, but didn't part.

     The guard crept across the stage, holding his gun out. "You've got two seconds to show yourself."

     When he was at the parting in the curtain, he reached out to grab the edge. The audience inhaled as if it were an single person waiting for something terrible to burst from back stage.

     The guard yelled, "Time's up." And in that moment a curly head poked from between the curtains.    

     "I lost," the little boy said.

     



2) Write something that's really scary and is about to happen.



     In six minutes the men would arrive and it would be time for the killing to begin.



3) Trap people together who are DANGEROUS:

   

     Just as he came to where he could see the cottage, Patches' screams struck him as hard as Milt's fists ever did.

    He stretched out his legs and in minutes covered the last few yards to the gate, up the front steps, and into the house.

    Patch huddled in the corner, his head under his arms.  Roan stood behind him with his belt looped though his fist and his hand ready to come down on Patch's backside, already swollen with a wide welt.

    "Stop."  Enrico screamed. (From Bad Boy, WIP C. Lee McKenzie)





or even DISGUSTING:



      The waiting room chairs were already fill when he stepped in from the July heat, sweat-soaked and reeking from his last cigarette. If he were a cartoon, flies would be circling his head.

     The receptionist pulled out a tissue and held it to her nose when he approached her desk to write his name on the pad of paper.

     As he turned to find a place to stand, Miriam prayed he wouldn't choose her corner, but that's exactly what he did, smiling at her with yellowed teeth and brushing against her knee as he took up the corner next to her.



4) Use structure and word choice to create more tension. Here's an excellent example from Stein on Writing. Notice how a change in the position of two sentence, the use of paragraphing and the use of the pronoun, "she," works to stretch the emotions of the reader and make him uneasy.



Version #1

"Before I got your message, I thought we were going to meet over at Urek's like usual. He in trouble again?"

A fog of silence descended. Nobody looked at anybody else. Finally, Feeney said, "She doesn't know."





Version #2

 "Before I got your message, I thought we were going to meet over at Urek's like usual.

A fog of silence descended. Nobody looked at anybody else.

"He in trouble again?

Finally, Feeney said, "She doesn't know."



5) Using the example again in 4) if you let the reader in on what has happened to Urek, then when the girl mentions him, a lot of tension builds. "She doesn't know, but I do and it's terrible." That's what's in the reader's head.



How do you create tension in your stories?



Next Throes of Thursday: Creating Tension Using Dialogue.



  Sliding on the Edge, C. Lee McKenzie, WestSide Books, Spring '09

ROW80 Wednesday Check In

I'm checking in for ROW80, but I also have a bit of BookBloggingNews. Teen Book Scene is interviewing and reviewing Princess of Las Pulgas starting this month. The first post in the series started on Corinne's beautiful Lost For Words blog. Hope you'll have a moment to stop by and leave a comment.



Now for the drum roll: I did what I said I wanted to do, then fell into a post-writer's day coma.
















I started out just fine. A few words here. A few words there. One blog post. One fb post. A few Tweets. Then Whamo! Sock! Pow! It was four o'clock and I was down for the count--not the word count either.





So that sort of tells the story. I reached my ROW80 goal. Did the rest of you? I'll check in to see. And how about Sheri Larson, Susan Kaye Quinn and Margo Berendsen? Like I said in the video,  those three are smokin'!



To see who else is writing to goals or if you want to set a goal and write too, check out this page.Sliding on the Edge, C. Lee McKenzie, WestSide Books, Spring '09

Monday Miscellany

On this week's Miscellany I have great news. Jessica Verday has organized an e-anthology of short stories by the 2009 Debs. It will be available on Amazon, Kindle and Smashwords. The tentative release date is October 4, 2011.



Contributing authors are: Jessica Verday, Carrie Ryan, Rhonda Stapleton, Cyn Balog, Lauren Bjorkman, Leigh Brescia, Teri Hall, Stacey Jay, Janet Gurtler, Jenny Moss, Jackson Pearce, Kristina Springer, Charity Tahmaseb, Jon Skovron, Heidi Kling, Saundra Mitchell, Jennifer Hubbard, Kirstin Cronn-Mills, Lara Zielin, Shani Petroff, Kurtis Scaletta, J.A. Yang, Jennifer Brown, Sydney Salter and me, C. Lee McKenzie.

Hope to have the cover to show you soon. 





More Miscellany is about this month's Stories for Children. They have a great May edition and I'm very fortunate to be there with a non-fiction piece called, Henry is a Tuatara. I always love appearing in this e-zine, and they've become a paying publication, so take a look at what they want for future editions. 

Now about that Stylish Blogger Award. Here are some very Stylish bloggers that I'd like to pass it on to.

Forever Young Adult Relish ReadsDaisyDayWriterLet's Book ItCatherine Stine's Idea CityWriting at High AltitudeWriting Uphill

As to telling you 7 things about ME that won't bore you into a stupor . . . 

I'd rather eat than sleep.I'd rather hike than sit--so pity the writer in me, okay?I love to write ghost stories almost as much as I love to read them.If there's pickles and candy on the menu, I'll take the pickles.I'm blonde, but don't tell anybody.I'm short unless I'm in South East Asia, and then I'm just the right height.I tend to be a recluse, but love a party with friends.

Whew! That's done. Now Stylish Blogger Award winners it's your turn.

Sliding on the Edge, C. Lee McKenzie, WestSide Books, Spring '09