Ajay Nair's Blog, page 7

Nature is Warning us !!

Last few weeks we are all wound up and worried. We are distancing ourselves. Has anyone here thought about what is actually happening here. May be not. We all are so self centered for a long period of time. Nature is shaking us. We looted nature for a long period of time. We became so obnoxious. Unknowingly we became so careless. Time to change that my friends. Time to take that action. For many years scientists were saying about Global Warming. No one really pay attention to it.Many decades now people are taking about Vegan or become Vegetarian to help the mother Earth. We did not pay attention to it.

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Now we are in the midst of self isolation due to COVID 19. Again, we know what is better to do now. We are listening because of its nature of spreading. We do know the danger. Friends, We need to pause and think a little more further here. I am sure this pandemic will pass us and we will survive. But the real lesson nature is giving us is what we need to practice from now on. I feel this as a reset from nature or supreme power. I felt that this is a true shaking of our pride. We need to change. We need to be a better human being. Respect Earth and its resources. Very important lesson.

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I read in news that people from Jalandhar woke up and they could see Himalayas. People were shocked to see Himalayas from their rooftops. Some lived their for entire life time and many generations, were never able to see this. What does this speak to us. Pollution. This lock down due to COVID is showing us how much we are abusing mother nature.

We started to eat any thing and everything living. Why? Supreme power has given us enough food. Why we want to eat everything out there. Respect the life. They all are here for a reason. We are disrupting it. I am starting to feel, Nature is giving us a warning. Listen to it and be responsible. COVID 19 is just a warning. There could be bigger ones if we don’t become sensible. We are not above all. Just remember that.

Every news channel now reports that carbon-dioxide emissions are record low here. Also, one other thing we realized now is that, Not everyone needs to go to office daily. They could achieve from their homes. Admin staff can work from home if they are managed well. I am doing that for a while now and I think, if we all can do our part in a smaller way, this world will be better. We can make it better for our kids. Many sickness will fade when the world altogether become polluted free. If you see this eye to eye with me. Share this post. Hope a few families can change, I am blessed.

Diverting thoughts…

I cannot stress this enough guys,

During this hard times and not been able to go to work. Every one reacts and cope differently. Mental health is very important for us. To keep us healthy we need to channel our thoughts to a positive nature. Lot of people who are extroverts will find it extremely hard to stay at home. All these free time, they do not know how to utilize it.

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This could be the time one can actually try something out, which you may have been wanting to do for a long time. Don’t get me wrong here. I am not talking about something you need to go out and be in public. You want to do that project at home. But no time. Now is the time isn’t it. You may have been thinking to re arrange that garage. This is the time guys. This is it. Do it. Do not sit in your room and kill your time or watch shows after show. Down the road you will get depressed.

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Mental health or issues can be a silent killer. No one should go through that because of this pandemic situation. I said, find that project. I did. The pictures I am going to post in this blog are taken by me. Well, I did not travel any where. These are from my own yard. I always wanted to take cool pictures. Let me tell you guys. The time I spend taking these picture and the outcome, has taken over my thoughts to a positive nature. I did not worry at that time. So if you all can find that something which can take your mind off. I promise we will have a healthy pandemic time period. I pray, those who are struggling can divert their thoughts and be healthy. I am sharing my thoughts here to help other. And my pictures.

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I also writes once a while. This does help me as well. People say it is easy to say, but it is hard to understand actual mental health problem. I admit. It is not easy for an outsider to understand the pain they go through. But we can definitely help them by suggesting solutions. May work for some. If I can be a help for one person I will consider myself blessed. So please if you like this share to someone you love. May be they could share this to someone they know. May be, not photography or writing. They may surprise us with a video or some form or art they love. They may find that energy, that spark who knows what. But at the end of the day, they are not de motivated or depressed. Doesn’t that sound healthy. Lets work together. Share this and help others. I am doing my part and encouraging those who read to share this to support a healthy society.

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I called her….

Life is a journey. We are all busy on our own ways, forgetting or neglecting to see others pains. We do this for personal gains. That is the saddest reality. I am writing here about an individual, I have known her for only less than 14 years. The most thought provoking personality I have ever known or will ever know. She was a warrior. Her life was so tough and she did not have a smooth path. All important occasions in her life had obstacles. Yet, She fought with her head high.

[image error]Photo by Tatiana Syrikova on Pexels.com

Came here as an immigrant more than four decades ago. Life was not easy back then. Working and taking care of family with minimum means was for sure a task. Failed marriage and not been able to take care of her youngest daughter must have broken anyone. She didn’t give up, the quality I got attracted towards her. Myself an immigrant we could connect so easily and she never treated me bad. We could talk all the rubbish in the world. We could connect with old movies and sometimes she did not have any interest in them, She listened and laughed at my silly jokes. I shared a lot from my childhood times. She enjoyed all the stories I had to say. I can see her eyes glow when I say my memories from India, She relates it back to me from Fiji. Our life style was similar and we did have a lot of common grounds. She always said “Here no life man. No life” She sighs always saying “Oh. Brother”. I felt that many times too. Here there is no life. We all live like robots here. Waste of life in a lot of ways. We both related easily because we both had experienced real essence of life back home in our own ways. Real struggles. That is why she survived here with all her hardships.

What broke my heart is when she told me “I went to a church where there was a wedding on the day my younger daughter got married”. So she felt she was a part of it. She coped and fought against her obstacles. She bought a baby doll, when her younger daughter had her baby. Took care of that baby doll as if she was taking care of her grand child. I salute this lady’s will power. I will never ever forget her. In my culture we call mother in law “auntie”. I never did. I called her… MOM. I realized she is a true form of a mom. A person with lot of patience.

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This is my fare well to her. I love you so much. When we see again. We will talk more about Hindi movies and your favorite actors as we usually do, when we were alone.Thank you for coming in to my life and most importantly you liked my cooking. Peace.

Uncharted times- A (+VE) Lesson to Learn.

Every body in the world now say a word constantly – Social Distancing. For a lot of people, it is very difficult. But if you think about it, in this day and age most of us are already distant. We may be friends on line. We may talk over messenger. But we are so busy with our careers and our own world. We did not pay attention to it. We felt that we are socializing a lot when we are at work. We neglect our own family members and our priorities are bigger and better. We never had time for any thing. We are constantly busy.

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Now, many countries are lock down and we are on self isolation ourselves etc. Time to think guys, Are we doing right here before this social distancing became reality check here? Now lot of us are still putting the work out there from home, still on track with our responsibilities at work. But we started to see people around you, Family. Those who matter most.

I see social postings now with family more than with friends. I see father cooking food for their family and posting those pictures. I see many playing card games with their family and posting them. This should be the case everyday my friends. We should be doing this every day. Not because of this social distancing and quarantine we have time. We always had time, But we neglected them. We will browse hours and hours on social media, Yet, we will push away our kids saying, “We are busy”

Guys, take this as a positive turn for everyone. We now have time. We spend time with our family more now, Yet again our career and priorities stays the same. This difficult times we pass through now, may be some supreme power above us is showing to us, how to live. Pay attention to our loved ones. Everything else can wait and realize that everything will wait for us. That is the truth. There is no rush to conquer or capture here. LOVE that is the what we need.

I heard lot of us are re adjusting ourselves how to behave around family. This unexpected stay at home situation is a test for them. Everyone out there says, we work for our family. But they don’t spent quality time with them. Why? This is sad. They toil themselves, and at the end of the day, their own children don’t know their parents well enough. I have worked in long term care facilities. I have see many parents there crying. They all have one thing to say “My kids don’t come and visit me”. This is true and sad fact. I have asked them, “What they did for living?” Most of them will say a lot about their career and how hard they worked. Reality check here everyone “How much time they spend with their kids?” They did not and that is where we are doing mistakes. The bond and the attachment is not there.

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After this self isolation and social distancing is over, practice and spend time with your family. This won’t hurt. My prayers are always there for the COVID 19 patients and healthcare workers. We will come out of this soon. Stay safe every one. Love your family. We can create a loving society and I think we should.

SEASON FOR FESTIVALS

Every one will have nostalgia. Some memories. Some time in your life, you wish you can experience again. Or in other words, you wish you forget. The picture above is from one of the temple festivals. This particular temple, I have never been. But I have been to many temple festivals while growing up in south India.

The vibe we get there, cannot be translated over here in few words. You need to experience it. You need to live it. Now almost two decades, I never had a chance to participate in one of the temple festivals. Life has taken many turns in the last two decades. Do I miss them. Yes. I do. The culture, the traditions, the life experience, the energy you get from these instances are hard to forget.

When I was growing up, I should say, I am about 14 years old or so. Just like my older son now. I will go and spend all ten days in the temple. I never went home after school. Yes, my parents were not too happy. But I did it. My friends all did it. We had so much fun and life. Today, I felt like writing this, because it is festival season in Kerala. My home town has many temples. They all had festivals. Many artists come and perform. The crowd enjoys them with out any religion barrier. We all are one. Just humanbeings.

Most of the temple festivals end with a procession by elephants and fire works. As you can see in picture above all elephants will be adorned with gold ornaments and many other colorful decorations. Temple society will fight for the best elephants to perform those processions. They go around the town for the entire night. We kids used to follow them. I still remember, the baby elephants playing with the tails of older ones. Also, once they are full and not hungry anymore, they throw coconuts to each other. The experience we cherish, as a writer, I am not capable to describe here.

Rarely one or two times, elephants go mad. Those instances are scary. But, I still went with elephants every year. Families, even if they are separated and away from Kerala, they made sure to meet during this times. Just like Christmas, we see this as family re union times.

Fire works at the end of the festival is the most amazing part. Some temple committee organizes competition. Those competitions are a treat to watch. We never went home all these ten days. We ate temple food. Watched many programs. Some times even walked from temple to temple to see different cultural programs.

Everyone will have nostalgia…. Enjoy them….

Life is always a journey. One cannot plan or reserve tickets….

Giving Birth does not make someone mother

Last few days I am haunted by the news from Kerala. I am not myself. I cannot concentrate a bit. Every time I think about it, I am disappointed. I don’t know why human being these days are acting like animals. Even, I don’t know animals will behave the way some people do these days. I am ashamed to say, I hail from Kerala. I admit, we proudly once called this state “GODS OWN COUNTRY”. Hundred percentage literacy state, but no use.

If you are wondering, what I am talking about, I will say a bit about this. I cannot even write this incident with out tearing up. I am sorry, those who read this may go through what I am going through. REAL agony and anger. But, as a citizen, I should try and give out this message. If I can change one person and if they stop from doing such an act, I am blessed as a person.

I will write incident in a few sentences here, Just to let the readers know. My intention is to not focus on the incident, but to encourage society not to follow the suit. Last week, one lady who is in her mid twenties with some marital problems. She also had extra marital affair. She decides to kill her baby by thrashing him on to the seawall rocks. She threw him twice to make sure he died, because she heard him cry after first attempt. She dis this to blame her husband and go with her lover.

I am sure, when a baby is born, their one and only person he or she trust is their mom. How much pain, that baby must have gone through? While going through that pain, who that baby must have looked for or cried out for? Definitely mom. How can a person especially mother could do that? She even brought her husband who was not living with her for the past many months to her house that very night, so she can portray this on him. Devilish act isn’t it?

That is why, I am saying. Giving birth don’t give the rights for one to become mother. That nourishing touch, that unconditional love should be there. A mother will give her life for her children. Fight for their rights. I have seen mothers fighting against their husbands to protect their kids. I have seen mothers giving food to their kids and stay hungry. I have seen mothers selling themselves, so they can give better life for their kids. But taking life, so she can go with her lover, cannot even think of. I saw her parents crying for this baby. They even saying, “why don’t you leave him for them and leave the house?”

I am devastated now and that boys face is still in my eyes. I want to say here, Please people, show some mercy. If you don’t want your kids, please give them to those who want them. Don’t torture them. Don’t kill them. Look at their innocent face. Before you take that leap, look at their smile.

This is not the world I want my kids to grow up. I will make sure, they know how to treat others, respect others. Children are the future of this world. Love them. They have no hatred in their hearts. Let them live- The most purest form of life. Babies.

I pray for you baby. Hope god is playing with you now up in the heavens. RIP.

Why people change?

[image error]We evolve just like nature evolve. Scars always happen, but we heal

We always hear people saying, he changed or she changed. He was not like that before or she was. Why is that? Does any one think about it? It is inevitable for anyone to stay in the state of inertia. We evolve. we change daily. If we really analyze closely, we can realize, we also changed. We are not the same as few years ago. Only problem is we just ignore ourselves.

Same happens at work as well. We hire some one who has all the skill sets checked. He or she is so Gung-ho at the beginning. Then the performance starts to struggle. Why? Rather than just saying, he changed or she did. Dig deep, what changed in the organization. Why he or she is not performing?

Lot of times experts says, communication is what breaks them. I tend to agree with this a lot. At the beginning, whether it is a job or in any other scenario, people listen to the new guy more. Slowly it changes. No more listening to the guy anymore. This causes frustrations and in most cases, they will become status quo. They will perform, but you will not see the same fire in them anymore. They stop talking. They will stop bringing in new ideas.

Not everyone gets motivated by money. Personally, I never get motivated by money. I get motivated when there is support. Achieve results together. Performing great sometimes leads to getting additional responsibilities. Not everyone seeks that. They want the job done well. As a manager, one need to understand that.

In short, nature, universe all change. Trees change their appearances. Same, people change. Depending mood, depending what circumstances they go through. Their mental status. Mental health. These all factors are there. But outsiders don’t see that.

Mental Health month, I want to emphasize, please don’t judge people. Try to help every one at work, house, society etc. Show empathy with them. We do not know what they are going through until unless we are in their shoes. Please understand that. Every one born in this world deserves a little love. Stop saying “He or She changed, Don’t know what is wrong with him or her”

Change yourself. Help others. Love others. Read more about mental health. Your loved one may be going through difficult times. Take first aid on mental health. I highly recommend it. I have done it. I am a better person after that. Thank you all for reading. Share. Support as always.

When Snow Falls…

[image error]When snow falls, It paints….

Year 2000, First time I saw snow. I have already lived more than two decades in this beautiful earth. I realize then, universe have many hidden talents. Some you will never discover through out your life time. I was so happy, I still remember vividly, it was in the evening around 7 pm. I walked out. First time I felt snow fall on my face. Happiness at that moment is hard to explain in words.

One may wonder, why I call snow as nature’s talent. The way it is formed, I am always amazed by it. The white color of it. Unaltered. It is most purest form of everything. You want to hold it, but you cannot keep it for ever. It will melt. At the same time what happens to that beautiful white color. It vanishes. As soon as we touch them the purity goes away.

When it falls from sky, even the nature stands still. I always felt the presence of some power at that time. You can see the world is glowing at that time. The color of the sky, the light around the buildings, let it be night. Let it be morning, it has got some sort of presence, like halo. There is peace to it. I love watching the snow fall. Mind you, I hate cleaning it later.

This winter, we had quite a bit of snow fall. We had trouble getting to work. We had a lot of difficulties. But how many of us actually went out for a bit just to enjoy what nature has given to us. For those who did not do that, I am giving you all a few glimpses of it. Hope you enjoy my clicks.

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[image error][image error]Nature’s Canvas. Look at this, how nature painted

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The Long Road by Daniel Oliver – Review

The Long Road – As the name states, it definitely is a long road for those who suffer with mental illness. Not only for the person who is going through it. The people around them, who loves them, also suffers a lot. Hank Galloway main character in this wonderful novel by Daniel Oliver suffers a lot. His agony, frustrations and not wanting to accept that he has mental problems are all well narrated by Daniel. I have admitted many times that I hate books and I am not an avid reader. This book captured my attention and made me read from the beginning till end without much trouble. Definitely a quick read.

Hank’s relationship with his Grandpa Joe is amazing. His words “Only doing what you believe is your calling will bring you peace with God and happiness” I loved that sentence and I believe in it too. Relationship with his father is portrayed nicely by the author. Hank’s relapses with his condition, nervous breakdowns. Going back and forth with his fear and instability. The story has a great pace and will keep the readers interest from beginning till end.

Recently I have taken a first aid course for Mental health. I have seen some ups and down with my colleagues due to mental health. Even a suicide. This story of Hank is a must read. Helps people to understand what it takes to help them. At this day and age, everyone is so busy with their own lives, selfishness. It takes a lot to understand mental health issues. Supporting them is what makes a society grow.

Daniel effectively get the reader’s attention or in other words give a great message to parents how they should not behave in front of their kids. How much kid’s life gets affected? Parents relationship with kids should be nurturing. This book opens up a lot of conversation around that topic. Hank says he can give up his right hand for a different decent father. That sums up everything.

The Long Road is a must read novel. Daniel captures beautifully one’s struggles dealing with mental sickness. Definitely a 5 star rating from me.

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Ajay Nair

Author of Droplets.

What I felt today, When I got the news.

We children always want to do special. Same thing happened with Cutie Fox. He wants to do something special for his dad. The adventure he goes through is what makes this book interesting for kids.

Dravid and Jayenth- Age 7 and 14. Their wild imaginations created the idea. That is how this book took life. Dravid gave the character name. He was so convinced when he said the fox name should be “Cutie Fox”

Today the book is on sale and I have to say, I am very proud. This moment of truth will be there forever. My kid’s and their kids will read about cutie fox. The realization of this makes me want to cry. The moments of happiness and smiles on my kids face are priceless. I am already successful. Cutie fox get noticed or not, this moment will live with me till I leave this planet.

Thank you universe and the force out there to motivate me through out this process. I felt many times, that this book will never find light. Some how, somewhere deep in me, made me want to look for help. That is how this happened. I am sure, when my author copies gets to my home. There will be more excitement. I cannot wait to see my kids reading their book. I have only one word… CONTENT.

https://www.amazon.com/Cutie-Went-Town-Ajay-Nair/dp/1480885894/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1578377668&sr=8-1

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