Ryan Field's Blog, page 558
May 12, 2011
Excerpt From "His Tuscan Embrace" Soon to be Published
I'm working on a new book, HIS TUSCAN EMBRACE, and I'm having a little trouble getting chapter four right. So I decided to post an excerpt here before I submit the book to the publisher, hoping to gain a different perspective by seeing it in published form.
Chapter Four
When Joey King had first moved to New York, he'd arrived a virgin. He'd grown up in a small town in Southern New Jersey, a place called Cowtown that was actually part of the rodeo circuit. And when a gay person grows up in a place called Cowtown, surrounded by farms, tobacco chewing cowboys, and little white country churches, where the most impressive home in the entire town is the funeral parlor and the most scandalous topic of conversation is the occasional divorce, there aren't many opportunities to meet other young gay men.
Joey learned how to survive by keeping a low profile and following those unspoken small town rules. When he heard the guys in school laughing about fags, he either pretended to laugh along with them or he turned his head and pretended he wasn't paying attention. In high school, when he changed in the boys' locker room, he moved fast and kept his eyes focused on his own locker. He couldn't say he had a terrible experience growing up like other gay men he knew. In other words, he fit in so well he was never personally bullied nor was he ever abused by anyone. In fact, most of the guys liked him and the small town girls were constantly flirting with him. This was partly because of his easy going personality, and partly because he was terrified of what might happen if anyone discovered he liked dick more than he liked pussy. He never forgot what happened to that one effeminate young guy who went to the small Catholic Church in town. This guy was always running around with the priests, sashaying through town in his long black alter boy dress, smiling and waving at everyone he passed. And then one day he shot himself and no one ever knew why. Joey King had his own suspicions. And that's why he left that town and never looked back the day after he graduated from high school.
It wasn't easy getting started in New York, with nothing but a suitcase filled with clothes, a few small personal items and a wallet that contained three thousand dollars he'd managed to save by working as a sales clerk part time for a country western boot shop in Cowtown. He stayed at the Chelsea Hotel for a few nights, and then he answered a roommate ad in The Village Voice to share a small studio in The East Village near Chinatown, on Broome Street. Within the same week, he found a job working as a bar tender in a gay bar so he could pay his rent and meager living expenses. He got into female impersonating by sheer accident. Six months after he answered the ad for the studio apartment, his roommate moved out in the middle of the night and left him with nothing but a stack of dirty underwear and a trunk filled with drag costumes.
Chapter Four
When Joey King had first moved to New York, he'd arrived a virgin. He'd grown up in a small town in Southern New Jersey, a place called Cowtown that was actually part of the rodeo circuit. And when a gay person grows up in a place called Cowtown, surrounded by farms, tobacco chewing cowboys, and little white country churches, where the most impressive home in the entire town is the funeral parlor and the most scandalous topic of conversation is the occasional divorce, there aren't many opportunities to meet other young gay men.
Joey learned how to survive by keeping a low profile and following those unspoken small town rules. When he heard the guys in school laughing about fags, he either pretended to laugh along with them or he turned his head and pretended he wasn't paying attention. In high school, when he changed in the boys' locker room, he moved fast and kept his eyes focused on his own locker. He couldn't say he had a terrible experience growing up like other gay men he knew. In other words, he fit in so well he was never personally bullied nor was he ever abused by anyone. In fact, most of the guys liked him and the small town girls were constantly flirting with him. This was partly because of his easy going personality, and partly because he was terrified of what might happen if anyone discovered he liked dick more than he liked pussy. He never forgot what happened to that one effeminate young guy who went to the small Catholic Church in town. This guy was always running around with the priests, sashaying through town in his long black alter boy dress, smiling and waving at everyone he passed. And then one day he shot himself and no one ever knew why. Joey King had his own suspicions. And that's why he left that town and never looked back the day after he graduated from high school.
It wasn't easy getting started in New York, with nothing but a suitcase filled with clothes, a few small personal items and a wallet that contained three thousand dollars he'd managed to save by working as a sales clerk part time for a country western boot shop in Cowtown. He stayed at the Chelsea Hotel for a few nights, and then he answered a roommate ad in The Village Voice to share a small studio in The East Village near Chinatown, on Broome Street. Within the same week, he found a job working as a bar tender in a gay bar so he could pay his rent and meager living expenses. He got into female impersonating by sheer accident. Six months after he answered the ad for the studio apartment, his roommate moved out in the middle of the night and left him with nothing but a stack of dirty underwear and a trunk filled with drag costumes.
Congrats to Nathan Bransford...
I've been following Nathan's blog since he started blogging. He's a consummate blogger, with regular posts that change all the time. His blog has evolved from a literary agent blog to an author's blog, with a great deal of publishing and writing advice in every post. In other words, as far as blogging goes, the man works his ass off to get it right.
I used to comment on Nathan's blog all the time. But I stopped commenting on most blogs with my name a while back because I started to receive hate letters from blog trolls. It happens, especially when you're openly gay, you use your own name, and you write gay fiction that doesn't hold back. Unfortunately, this is why I have to use comment moderation here on my own blog all the time. But I still comment on Nathan's posts anonymously every so often, and I still read them as much as I used to.
But this post isn't about blogging or blog trolls. It's about Nathan's new book that was just released today, Jacob Wonderbar and the Cosmic Space Kapow. It's middle grade fiction, with, I think, the ability to cross into YA and adult (I just finished a book by Catherine Ryan Hyde that was YA, and I loved it). And you can read all about it here, on Nathan's blog, where there are links to purchase the book and an excerpt of the first chapter.
I used to comment on Nathan's blog all the time. But I stopped commenting on most blogs with my name a while back because I started to receive hate letters from blog trolls. It happens, especially when you're openly gay, you use your own name, and you write gay fiction that doesn't hold back. Unfortunately, this is why I have to use comment moderation here on my own blog all the time. But I still comment on Nathan's posts anonymously every so often, and I still read them as much as I used to.
But this post isn't about blogging or blog trolls. It's about Nathan's new book that was just released today, Jacob Wonderbar and the Cosmic Space Kapow. It's middle grade fiction, with, I think, the ability to cross into YA and adult (I just finished a book by Catherine Ryan Hyde that was YA, and I loved it). And you can read all about it here, on Nathan's blog, where there are links to purchase the book and an excerpt of the first chapter.
Facebook's Rules About Promoting
I saw this on FB and figured I'd share on the blog. Most of what I see on FB is promotion, so I don't totally get it. When I post almost anything on facebook, I'm usually linking directly from this blog. And since this blog isn't for profit, I assume it's not considered promotional. But there are gray areas I'm not sure I understand. I've never held a contest or asked for money. And if I'm not supposed to do what I've been doing for so long, why is there a link on google blogger to FB. I'm assuming this has more to do with contests and marketing promotions, not bloggers. But if I'm wrong, I'm sure I'll find out soon enough.
Frankly, all I see on FB are promotions for one contest or another. I get e-mail updates and notifications constantly from people I don't know and never will know. I don't mind. It takes a second to click "delete," and sometimes there's a promotion I am interested in reading about. And if everyone stopped promoting on FB the only thing FB would have left would be status updates about someone's Aunt Nancy, what Betty Jane made for dinner, and how grampa just passed his kidney stone.
I'm not certain whether or not this falls under the stipulations stated below, but last year I did see something questionable on FB that left me wondering. A guy from New York, who happens to have a well known brother in local TV news in the Philadelphia area, was promoting himself as a musician and hocking people for donations. It was like this weird fundraiser...for HIMSELF. I didn't like that. And I promptly clicked "unfriend," but last I saw he made a nice little bag of loot from facebook, through virtual strangers, that added up to thousands of dollars.
Promotions Guidelines
Date of Last Revision: May 11, 2011
These Promotion Guidelines, along with the Statement of Rights and Responsibilities, the Ad Guidelines, the Platform Policies and all other applicable Facebook policies, govern your communication about or administration of any contest, competition, sweepstakes or other similar offering (each, a "promotion") using Facebook.
If you use Facebook to communicate about or administer a promotion, you are responsible for the lawful operation of that promotion, including the official rules, offer terms and eligibility requirements (e.g., age and residency restrictions), and compliance with regulations governing the promotion and all prizes offered in connection with the promotion (e.g., registration and obtaining necessary regulatory approvals). Please note that compliance with these Guidelines does not constitute the lawfulness of a promotion. Promotions are subject to many regulations and if you are not certain that your promotion complies with applicable law, please consult with an expert.
Promotions on Facebook must be administered within Apps on Facebook.com, either on a Canvas Page or an app on a Page Tab.
Promotions on Facebook must include the following:
a. A complete release of Facebook by each entrant or participant.
b. Acknowledgment that the promotion is in no way sponsored, endorsed or administered by, or associated with, Facebook.
c. Disclosure that the participant is providing information to [disclose recipient(s) of information] and not to Facebook.
You must not use Facebook features or functionality as a promotion's registration or entry mechanism. For example, the act of liking a Page or checking in to a Place cannot automatically register or enter a promotion participant.
You must not condition registration or entry upon the user taking any action using any Facebook features or functionality other than liking a Page, checking in to a Place, or connecting to your app. For example, you must not condition registration or entry upon the user liking a Wall post, or commenting or uploading a photo on a Wall.
You must not use Facebook features or functionality, such as the Like button, as a voting mechanism for a promotion.
You must not notify winners through Facebook, such as through Facebook messages, chat, or posts on profiles or Pages.
You may not use Facebook's name, trademarks, trade names, copyrights, or any other intellectual property in connection with a promotion or mention Facebook in the rules or materials relating to the promotion, except as needed to fulfill your obligations under Section 2.
Definitions:
a. By "administration" we mean the operation of any element of the promotion, such as collecting entries, conducting a drawing, judging entries, or notifying winners.
b. By "communication" we mean promoting, advertising or referencing a promotion in any way on Facebook, e.g., in ads, on a Page, or in a Wall post.
c. By "contest" or "competition" we mean a promotion that includes a prize of monetary value and a winner determined on the basis of skill (i.e., through judging based on specific criteria).
d. By "sweepstakes" we mean a promotion that includes a prize of monetary value and a winner selected on the basis of chance. [image error]
Frankly, all I see on FB are promotions for one contest or another. I get e-mail updates and notifications constantly from people I don't know and never will know. I don't mind. It takes a second to click "delete," and sometimes there's a promotion I am interested in reading about. And if everyone stopped promoting on FB the only thing FB would have left would be status updates about someone's Aunt Nancy, what Betty Jane made for dinner, and how grampa just passed his kidney stone.
I'm not certain whether or not this falls under the stipulations stated below, but last year I did see something questionable on FB that left me wondering. A guy from New York, who happens to have a well known brother in local TV news in the Philadelphia area, was promoting himself as a musician and hocking people for donations. It was like this weird fundraiser...for HIMSELF. I didn't like that. And I promptly clicked "unfriend," but last I saw he made a nice little bag of loot from facebook, through virtual strangers, that added up to thousands of dollars.
Promotions Guidelines
Date of Last Revision: May 11, 2011
These Promotion Guidelines, along with the Statement of Rights and Responsibilities, the Ad Guidelines, the Platform Policies and all other applicable Facebook policies, govern your communication about or administration of any contest, competition, sweepstakes or other similar offering (each, a "promotion") using Facebook.
If you use Facebook to communicate about or administer a promotion, you are responsible for the lawful operation of that promotion, including the official rules, offer terms and eligibility requirements (e.g., age and residency restrictions), and compliance with regulations governing the promotion and all prizes offered in connection with the promotion (e.g., registration and obtaining necessary regulatory approvals). Please note that compliance with these Guidelines does not constitute the lawfulness of a promotion. Promotions are subject to many regulations and if you are not certain that your promotion complies with applicable law, please consult with an expert.
Promotions on Facebook must be administered within Apps on Facebook.com, either on a Canvas Page or an app on a Page Tab.
Promotions on Facebook must include the following:
a. A complete release of Facebook by each entrant or participant.
b. Acknowledgment that the promotion is in no way sponsored, endorsed or administered by, or associated with, Facebook.
c. Disclosure that the participant is providing information to [disclose recipient(s) of information] and not to Facebook.
You must not use Facebook features or functionality as a promotion's registration or entry mechanism. For example, the act of liking a Page or checking in to a Place cannot automatically register or enter a promotion participant.
You must not condition registration or entry upon the user taking any action using any Facebook features or functionality other than liking a Page, checking in to a Place, or connecting to your app. For example, you must not condition registration or entry upon the user liking a Wall post, or commenting or uploading a photo on a Wall.
You must not use Facebook features or functionality, such as the Like button, as a voting mechanism for a promotion.
You must not notify winners through Facebook, such as through Facebook messages, chat, or posts on profiles or Pages.
You may not use Facebook's name, trademarks, trade names, copyrights, or any other intellectual property in connection with a promotion or mention Facebook in the rules or materials relating to the promotion, except as needed to fulfill your obligations under Section 2.
Definitions:
a. By "administration" we mean the operation of any element of the promotion, such as collecting entries, conducting a drawing, judging entries, or notifying winners.
b. By "communication" we mean promoting, advertising or referencing a promotion in any way on Facebook, e.g., in ads, on a Page, or in a Wall post.
c. By "contest" or "competition" we mean a promotion that includes a prize of monetary value and a winner determined on the basis of skill (i.e., through judging based on specific criteria).
d. By "sweepstakes" we mean a promotion that includes a prize of monetary value and a winner selected on the basis of chance. [image error]
The Skater Boy-Short Story E-book: On Amazon Now
I just found an amazon link to the short e-book, SKATER BOY, that was released last week. I'm never certain when these books are going to go on sale anywhere, which is why I always post links to publishers web sites the day of release. Sometimes it takes a while for e-books to appear on other web sites where e-books are sold.
So here's the amazon link, and I'm sure it's up for sale on all other well known web sites where e-books are sold. The only one I don't think it's on is Kobo. Kobo has about twenty-four of my other books, but not the short story e-books.[image error]
May 11, 2011
What To Do When You Get a Snippy E-Mail From Someone's Assistant...
I had to share this today. I had an "experience" with a celebrity's assistant this morning that was priceless. I'm not sharing because I care much about it, but I think it's interesting the way people can be so absolutely rude these days.
I may or may not have stated on this blog that I used to do editorial work for a few writers. Three years ago I stopped to focus completely on my own fiction, but I kept one client with me because I love his work and I enjoy editing for him. He writes spiritual/new age (not religious) books, and all of his work is channeled through what he calls "spirit guides." (Take that for what it's worth: I've learned not to question anything that can't be proven right or wrong.) He doesn't have a platform, he isn't interested in becoming rich and famous through his writings, and he writes because the guides are constantly giving him information. I enjoy editing and reading his work...even though my own time is limited these days...and charge him one dollar a page. If he didn't insist, I'd do it for free. He's older, he doesn't have e-mail, and the Internet is completely foreign to him.
And when I see something on the Internet where I think his work might be a good fit, so to speak, I usually submit something on his behalf. I don't do this for profit, promotion, or any kind of recognition. I remain in the background at all times. It's simply a way to pay it forward and to share information for free, so other people can benefit from his work the same way I have. And my writer friend is all for this. He's 76 years old and loves knowing that he might be helping other people with his spiritual work.
So last week I saw a celebrity web site (Shirley Maclaine's) where they asked for submissions from writers on various topics, including spiritual. This is a well known celebrity who has been around the film industry for a long time, and also the publishing industry. I thought this web site would be a great place to submit my friend's work; just to see if they were interested in sharing it. And they were asking for submissions, so I contacted them about guidelines. I thought I made it clear that this wasn't about promoting or marketing books...especially my own books. First, it would be stupid for me to promote erotic m/m romance on a spiritual web site, and I'm not an idiot. Second, my 76 year old writer friend is more interested in sharing his work than he is in selling or promoting his work.
Evidently, the snippy assistant didn't understand. She replied with a snippy e-mail informing me they didn't promote books. And I wondered WTF she was talking about. I never mentioned anything about promotion or marketing. So I replied, with an explanation in no uncertain terms, that this was not about promoting books...or anything else...and if I did submit my friend's work..for him, not me...it would only be to share his work. Period.
I could have been nasty. I could have been just as snippy as she was. If I had an assistant like this, I'd sit her down and show her how to send a civil response...especially if I were a celebrity who is always complaining about how rude the world is in her latest book. I'm not interested in gaining anything by submitting my friend's work, and neither is my friend. So I decided to remain polite, repeat my intentions in detail, and leave it at that. Whether or not she gets it, is up to her. And, I'm no amateur when it comes to submitting to publishers or agents. I've been doing it all my life and I know exactly how to do it.
After thinking about it, I may not even bother to submit his work to this celebrity web site. I had bad vibes and didn't like the energy. And if you have to work with a snippy assistant for nothing, it's probably not worth it. I might just start posting my friend's work here on my own blog once in a while. I know the two genres don't go together...they are night and day. But I think my readers are open-minded enough to appreciate some nice, quiet spiritual, non-religious, writings that may or may not help them out with some things in their lives.
I may or may not have stated on this blog that I used to do editorial work for a few writers. Three years ago I stopped to focus completely on my own fiction, but I kept one client with me because I love his work and I enjoy editing for him. He writes spiritual/new age (not religious) books, and all of his work is channeled through what he calls "spirit guides." (Take that for what it's worth: I've learned not to question anything that can't be proven right or wrong.) He doesn't have a platform, he isn't interested in becoming rich and famous through his writings, and he writes because the guides are constantly giving him information. I enjoy editing and reading his work...even though my own time is limited these days...and charge him one dollar a page. If he didn't insist, I'd do it for free. He's older, he doesn't have e-mail, and the Internet is completely foreign to him.
And when I see something on the Internet where I think his work might be a good fit, so to speak, I usually submit something on his behalf. I don't do this for profit, promotion, or any kind of recognition. I remain in the background at all times. It's simply a way to pay it forward and to share information for free, so other people can benefit from his work the same way I have. And my writer friend is all for this. He's 76 years old and loves knowing that he might be helping other people with his spiritual work.
So last week I saw a celebrity web site (Shirley Maclaine's) where they asked for submissions from writers on various topics, including spiritual. This is a well known celebrity who has been around the film industry for a long time, and also the publishing industry. I thought this web site would be a great place to submit my friend's work; just to see if they were interested in sharing it. And they were asking for submissions, so I contacted them about guidelines. I thought I made it clear that this wasn't about promoting or marketing books...especially my own books. First, it would be stupid for me to promote erotic m/m romance on a spiritual web site, and I'm not an idiot. Second, my 76 year old writer friend is more interested in sharing his work than he is in selling or promoting his work.
Evidently, the snippy assistant didn't understand. She replied with a snippy e-mail informing me they didn't promote books. And I wondered WTF she was talking about. I never mentioned anything about promotion or marketing. So I replied, with an explanation in no uncertain terms, that this was not about promoting books...or anything else...and if I did submit my friend's work..for him, not me...it would only be to share his work. Period.
I could have been nasty. I could have been just as snippy as she was. If I had an assistant like this, I'd sit her down and show her how to send a civil response...especially if I were a celebrity who is always complaining about how rude the world is in her latest book. I'm not interested in gaining anything by submitting my friend's work, and neither is my friend. So I decided to remain polite, repeat my intentions in detail, and leave it at that. Whether or not she gets it, is up to her. And, I'm no amateur when it comes to submitting to publishers or agents. I've been doing it all my life and I know exactly how to do it.
After thinking about it, I may not even bother to submit his work to this celebrity web site. I had bad vibes and didn't like the energy. And if you have to work with a snippy assistant for nothing, it's probably not worth it. I might just start posting my friend's work here on my own blog once in a while. I know the two genres don't go together...they are night and day. But I think my readers are open-minded enough to appreciate some nice, quiet spiritual, non-religious, writings that may or may not help them out with some things in their lives.
May 10, 2011
Homeless Gay Youth, Bullying, and a Problem I Once Had With a Book Reviewer About This...
A friend recently told me about the rising number in homeless gay and transgender youth. And bullying seems to play a large part in this.
Here's part of an interesting article I found, and here's the link to the entire piece. As I come up with different things and more information about the topic, I'll post more.
And, sadly, this is the information we do know. I'm certain there are cases in large numbers we don't know about. The friend I posted about in the Chaz Bono post below this post was, in fact, homeless for a long time until a group of us helped him out.
If you are young, gay, and homeless, reach out for help. There are a lot of people who would be more than willing to support you. I know this because I've seen it first hand.
I wrote about this in AN OFFICER AND HIS GENTLEMAN, and two years ago a book reviewer argued the point that the gay character in the book had options and he had choices. And then she slammed the book because I didn't mention his options or choices. When I kindly pointed out that young gay people don't always think they have options, she was shocked. You can read all about it in this previous post. I won't comment on a book review of mine ever...unless it's not socially responsible and I have either personal knowledge or facts to back me up. And I won't write about it in the first place unless I have the facts or knowledge.
Harassment at school leads to high dropout rates
86 percent: The portion of gay and lesbian students who reported being verbally harassed at school due to their sexual orientation in 2007.
44 percent: The portion of gay and lesbian students who reported being physically harassed at school because of their sexual orientation in 2007.
22 percent: The portion of gay and transgender students who reported having been physically attacked in school in 2007. Sixty percent say they did not report the incidents because they believed no one would care.
31 percent: The portion of gay and transgender students who report incidents of harassment and violence at school to staff only to receive no response.
Two times: How much less likely gay and transgender students are to finish high school or pursue a college education compared to the national average.[image error]
Here's part of an interesting article I found, and here's the link to the entire piece. As I come up with different things and more information about the topic, I'll post more.
And, sadly, this is the information we do know. I'm certain there are cases in large numbers we don't know about. The friend I posted about in the Chaz Bono post below this post was, in fact, homeless for a long time until a group of us helped him out.
If you are young, gay, and homeless, reach out for help. There are a lot of people who would be more than willing to support you. I know this because I've seen it first hand.
I wrote about this in AN OFFICER AND HIS GENTLEMAN, and two years ago a book reviewer argued the point that the gay character in the book had options and he had choices. And then she slammed the book because I didn't mention his options or choices. When I kindly pointed out that young gay people don't always think they have options, she was shocked. You can read all about it in this previous post. I won't comment on a book review of mine ever...unless it's not socially responsible and I have either personal knowledge or facts to back me up. And I won't write about it in the first place unless I have the facts or knowledge.
Harassment at school leads to high dropout rates
86 percent: The portion of gay and lesbian students who reported being verbally harassed at school due to their sexual orientation in 2007.
44 percent: The portion of gay and lesbian students who reported being physically harassed at school because of their sexual orientation in 2007.
22 percent: The portion of gay and transgender students who reported having been physically attacked in school in 2007. Sixty percent say they did not report the incidents because they believed no one would care.
31 percent: The portion of gay and transgender students who report incidents of harassment and violence at school to staff only to receive no response.
Two times: How much less likely gay and transgender students are to finish high school or pursue a college education compared to the national average.[image error]
May 9, 2011
Chaz Bono...Transition: The Story of How I Became A Man
I don't usually take time out of my day to watch Oprah at four o'clock in the afternoon. But I did today, because Chaz Bono was doing an interview and promoting his new book, Transition: The Story Of How I Became A Man.
Although I can't relate completely as a gay man, I did have a friend once who was a woman who felt as if he was trapped in a man's body. I didn't know this at first. He was always very reclusive and quiet. And he refused to show is feet...even when he went to the beach. As it turned out, he refused to show is feet because his toenails were always painted and he didn't want anyone to find out. It wouldn't have mattered: he was with a group of gay people who wouldn't have cared whether his toenails were painted or not. But in his mind the magnitude of wanting to be a woman was so intense he created this sort of block that kept him separated from the rest of the world. It's the only way I can describe it.
Eventually, he came to terms and is now living somewhere in Philadelphia as a woman. But he cut off all his friends, even the ones who would have supported him, because it was such an intense situation for him. So while I can't personally relate to this topic, I'm very empathetic to it and I think what Chaz did took a massive amount of courage most people wouldn't be able to handle.
I'll be reading Chaz's book. And, I hope Chaz decides to enter this in the Rainbow Awards this year. I think it's a must read for anyone in the lgbt community.
At first, America knew the only child of Sonny and Cher as Chastity, the cherubic little girl who appeared on her parents' TV show. In later years, she became famous for coming out on a national stage, working with two major organizations toward LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender) rights and publishing two books. And just within the past eighteen months, Chaz Bono has entered the public consciousness as the most high-profile transgender person ever.
All through the hoopla surrounding his change, Chaz has insisted on maintaining his privacy. Now, in Transition, Chaz finally tells his story. Part One traces his decision to transition, beginning in his childhood-when he played on the boys' teams and wore boys' clothing whenever possible-and going through his painful, but ultimately joyful, coming out in his twenties, up to 2008, when, after the death of his father, drug addiction, and five years of sobriety, Chaz was finally ready to begin the process of changing his gender. In Part Two, he offers an unprecedented record in words and photographs of the actual transition, a real-time diary as he navigates uncharted waters. These chapters capture the day-to-day momentum of his life as his body changes.
Throughout the book, Chaz touches on themes of identity, gender, and sexuality; parents and children; and how harboring secrets shatters the soul. It is an amazing contribution to our understanding of a much- misunderstood community. [image error]
The Bitches of Bad Romance...
I've talked about how authors should react to bad reviews several times in previous posts. But I've never talked much about how authors should react to other authors who make negative comments about them. I think I touched on this once. But not very often.
And that's because it doesn't happen often. Most authors I know are always willing to support their fellow authors...this even crosses genres. I've shouted for a few YA authors I love, and they've done the same for me. It's a small, civil, pleasant circle between writers, which makes it all the more worth while.
But every so often there's one bitch that ruins it for everyone. An author friend e-mailed me yesterday afternoon about how another author has been making fun of her and posting snarky, negative comments about her in public. First, my author friend was floored. She never expected this kind of behavior from another author. Second, my author friend wasn't sure how to respond. My friend, whom I love dearly, isn't shy. Her first instinct was to go after the bitch and bury her. A perfectly normal way to react, too.
Thankfully, my friend e-mailed me first and we talked about it on the telephone for almost an hour. I talked her out of responding to the negative comments with a counter attack. I believe that when you are attacked by another author, to respond with a counter attack would just promote more negativity. I told my friend that it's not worth the time, the energy, or the e-ink. Anyone who is a professional and has even the slightest amount of decorum won't pay attention to the author who made the attack. If anything, people will think much less of the author who made the attack. Besides, why give the author who made the attack an ounce of free publicity? In some cases, I think the few asshole-authors out there who do attack other authors are looking for free publicity. And why should they get it?
I've been through this myself a while back. It only happened once, with an obscure romance author who has more mouth than book sales. And I was shocked that another author whom I'd never even met would attack me in public for no apparent reason. Without knowing a thing about me, she attacked my writing, my books, my background, and even my personality. Frankly, my first instinct was to go after the bitch, too. But then a good friend of mine I've mentioned before, a literary agent who's been in the business for over 30 years, talked me out of it.
So I passed his advice on to my friend yesterday. And she felt so much better. Though I'm still sure she wants to fight back, I think I talked her into just ignoring the negative comments and moving forward. And now I'm passing this advice on to anyone who has ever gone through a similar situation. Like I said above, it doesn't happen often...most authors know how hard other authors work and they wouldn't even think about attacking another author in a personal level. But when it does happen, the best thing to do is simply ignore it. Nine times out of ten the author who is making the attack will eventually disappear and never be heard from again anyway. In the past twenty years, I've seen that happen more than once, too.
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And that's because it doesn't happen often. Most authors I know are always willing to support their fellow authors...this even crosses genres. I've shouted for a few YA authors I love, and they've done the same for me. It's a small, civil, pleasant circle between writers, which makes it all the more worth while.
But every so often there's one bitch that ruins it for everyone. An author friend e-mailed me yesterday afternoon about how another author has been making fun of her and posting snarky, negative comments about her in public. First, my author friend was floored. She never expected this kind of behavior from another author. Second, my author friend wasn't sure how to respond. My friend, whom I love dearly, isn't shy. Her first instinct was to go after the bitch and bury her. A perfectly normal way to react, too.
Thankfully, my friend e-mailed me first and we talked about it on the telephone for almost an hour. I talked her out of responding to the negative comments with a counter attack. I believe that when you are attacked by another author, to respond with a counter attack would just promote more negativity. I told my friend that it's not worth the time, the energy, or the e-ink. Anyone who is a professional and has even the slightest amount of decorum won't pay attention to the author who made the attack. If anything, people will think much less of the author who made the attack. Besides, why give the author who made the attack an ounce of free publicity? In some cases, I think the few asshole-authors out there who do attack other authors are looking for free publicity. And why should they get it?
I've been through this myself a while back. It only happened once, with an obscure romance author who has more mouth than book sales. And I was shocked that another author whom I'd never even met would attack me in public for no apparent reason. Without knowing a thing about me, she attacked my writing, my books, my background, and even my personality. Frankly, my first instinct was to go after the bitch, too. But then a good friend of mine I've mentioned before, a literary agent who's been in the business for over 30 years, talked me out of it.
So I passed his advice on to my friend yesterday. And she felt so much better. Though I'm still sure she wants to fight back, I think I talked her into just ignoring the negative comments and moving forward. And now I'm passing this advice on to anyone who has ever gone through a similar situation. Like I said above, it doesn't happen often...most authors know how hard other authors work and they wouldn't even think about attacking another author in a personal level. But when it does happen, the best thing to do is simply ignore it. Nine times out of ten the author who is making the attack will eventually disappear and never be heard from again anyway. In the past twenty years, I've seen that happen more than once, too.
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May 8, 2011
If You're Writing Erotic Romance....
You have to check this out. And I'm not only linking to wiki, I'm copying and pasting from wiki for those who don't like to click links. (I know how much links annoy you:)
But seriously. This is one is a must for all authors of erotica. And even if you don't learn anything, you'll have something interesting to talk about that will impress everyone.
There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. ~Favorite Anaïs Nin Quote
Anaïs Nin
Here's the part about erotica...to read more check out the entire link here:
Erotic writings
Nin is hailed by many critics as one of the finest writers of female erotica. She was one of the first women to explore fully the realm of erotic writing, and certainly the first prominent woman in the modern West to write erotica. Before her, erotica written by women was rare, with a few notable exceptions, such as the work of Kate Chopin.
According to Volume I of her diaries, 1931–1934, published in 1966 (Stuhlmann), Nin first came across erotica when she returned to Paris with her [husband,] mother and two brothers in her late teens. They rented the apartment of an American man who was away for the summer, and Nin came across a number of French paperbacks: "One by one, I read these books, which were completely new to me. I had never read erotic literature in America… They overwhelmed me. I was innocent before I read them, but by the time I had read them all, there was nothing I did not know about sexual exploits… I had my degree in erotic lore."
Portrait of Anaïs Nin in the 1970s.Faced with a desperate need for money, Nin, Miller and some of their friends began in the 1940s to write erotic and pornographic narratives for an anonymous "collector" for a dollar a page, somewhat as a joke.[15] (It is not clear whether Miller actually wrote these stories or merely allowed his name to be used.[16]) Nin considered the characters in her erotica to be extreme caricatures and never intended the work to be published, but changed her mind in the early 1970s and allowed them to be published as Delta of Venus[17][18] and Little Birds.
Nin was a friend, and in some cases lover, of many leading literary figures, including Henry Miller, Antonin Artaud, Edmund Wilson, Gore Vidal, James Agee, James Leo Herlihy, and Lawrence Durrell. Her passionate love affair and friendship with Miller strongly influenced her both as a woman and an author. Nin wrote about her infatuation with the Surrealist artist Bridget Bate Tichenor in her diaries.[19][20] The rumor that Nin was bisexual was given added circulation by the Philip Kaufman film Henry & June. This rumor is dashed by at least two encounters Nin writes about in her third unexpurgated journal, Fire. The first is with a patient of Nin's (Nin was working as a psychoanalyst in New York at the time), Thurema Sokol, with whom nothing physical occurs. She also describes a ménage à trois in a hotel, and while Nin is attracted to the other woman, she does not respond completely (229–31). Nin confirms that she is not bisexual in her unpublished 1940 diary when she states that although she could be attracted erotically to some women, the sexual act itself made her uncomfortable. What is irrefutable is her sexual attraction to men.
Nin's first unexpurgated journal, Henry and June, makes it clear, despite the notion to the contrary, that she did not have sexual relations with Miller's wife, June. While Nin was stirred by June to the point where she says (paraphrasing), "I have become June," she did not consummate her erotic feelings for her. Still, to both Anais and Henry, June was a femme fatale—irresistible, cunning, erotic. Nin gave June money, jewelry, clothes, oftentimes leaving herself broke. In her second unexpurgated journal, Incest, she wrote that she had an incestuous relationship with her father, which was graphically described (207–15). When Nin's father learned of the title of her first book of fiction, House of Incest, he feared that the true nature of their relationship would be revealed, when, in fact, it was heavily veiled in Nin's text.[image error]
Joan Rivers Drops F-Bomb on Red Carpet: 'Stop Campaigning' and 'Take Car...
I've seen various slants on what Joan Rivers said below. Many have been twisted. But if you view this with objectivity...which is something we don't seem to have much of these days in the mainstream media in America...you'll see that she's talking about ALL politicians, not just any one politician in particular. And, frankly, I couldn't agree with her more about celebrities (or authors trying to promote fiction) getting involved in politics.
