Maureen Sharphouse's Blog, page 3

Making a Difference -You Just Have to Care…

The current Coronavirus pandemic means life is even more challenging at present.

With wearing masks and restrictions often in place,  it is easy to lose sight of life’s preciousness and feel as if you are on your own and as if no one cares.

You and I may not be able to heal the world or stop the course of the pandemic –  but each of us shouldn’t lose sight of the fact that each of us has the power to make a difference in someone’s life.

I have just shared the following story with one of my clients.

It really struck a chord with them – and has inspired them to pick up the phone to chat for a while with an elderly neighbour.

I hope the following Starfish Story resonates with you also and that you feel inspired to carry out an act of kindness too.

“One person can make a difference, and everyone should try.” 

John F. Kennedy.

The Starfish Story

(Original story attributed to  Loren Eisley)

One day, a young boy was walking along a beach on which countless starfish had been washed up. As he walks a little further along, he notices an elderly gentleman picking something up and throwing it back into the ocean.

Approaching the man, he says, “I’m curious. What are you doing?”

The man replies, “Throwing starfish back into the ocean. The sun is up, and the tide is going out. If I don’t throw them back into the water, they’ll die.”

“I know you are trying to be helpful,” says the boy, “but don’t you realise that there are miles and miles of beach and hundreds and hundreds of starfish? You can’t possibly make a difference!”

After listening politely, the elderly man bends down, picks up another starfish and throws it back into the ocean.

Then, smiling at the boy, he says…. “I made a difference for that one.”

 

 “Unexpected kindness is the most powerful, least costly, and most underrated agent of human change.”

Bob Kerrey

In today’s challenging world, it is more important than ever to live with love and support and look out for each other.

You don’t need to be brilliant or perfect to make a difference.

You don’t need to be rich, highly intellectual or successful.

You just have to have compassion; you just need to care.

Keep well, keep safe.

And if this story has resonated with you, make a personal commitment to carry out an act of kindness and compassion, right now, today.

 

 

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How To Motivate Yourself to Take Action – A Simple Strategy that Works….

Does lack of motivation hold you back at times from making the most of life?  Are there occasions you feel like hibernating rather than knuckling down and getting a job done?

Well, the good news is you are human. Lack of motivation can happen to the best of people. I experienced it for myself recently as I watched the pile of paperwork on my desk mounting. I had been so busy writing and seeing clients that  I had been putting my paperwork off for days.

Today, however,  I am feeling quite smug, for my desk is clear and I feel on top once more. Let me share with you the strategy I used that fired me to take action. Many of my clients use this strategy also.

I encourage you to try it whenever a motivation meltdown next strikes.

Overcoming  Motivation Meltdown: A Step by Step Strategy That Works!

 

#1: Visualise the end result as if you’ve already achieved it

Instead of making lots of little pictures in your mind of the task in hand and the process, make one big bold picture only of the successful end result. (See yourself already having successfully done  whatever you’ve been lacking the motivation  to do.)

Take time to make the picture perfect – with everything having gone exactly the way you would like it to.  Make the picture nearer you and clearer. Then make it bolder and bigger, and the colours richer and brighter. Add in any sounds and adjust the clarity, tone or pitch of the sound so it’s perfect too.

Focusing your attention in this way on the picture of you having already having done things will help inspire you to take action. It will build your desire and hunger also, for successfully achieving the end result.

#2: Float or step into the picture

When the picture is perfect imagine stepping into the picture and floating into your own body. See what’s going on around you as if through your own eyes.  Hear the sounds around you as if through your own ears. Allow yourself to fully associate with and experience the emotions you have.

#3: Feel how good it feels

Procrastination gets you nowhere. And lack of motivation is draining. Knowing how good it will feel once you have successfully achieved things will further fire your hunger to get the task done!

#4: Work out where those good feelings are in your body

Be self-aware and get to understand yourself. Different emotions and feelings tend to hit in different places. Knowing where those good feelings exist for you in your body will allow you to build on them and keep them going – and fire your motivation even more.

Perhaps for you, it’s in your gut?  In your head or chest? Or are they going through your core?

#5: Now work out which way those feelings are naturally spinning

It may sound a little odd to you at first, but all feelings spin within our bodies. That’s how feelings build and keep going – otherwise, they would pass through you like a floating cloud….

Perhaps your good feelings are coming from within you, and spinning outwards in a circular motion?

Or are they spinning in towards you? Or side to side? And if so which way?

#6: Take control and spin them bigger

Once you have worked out where your feelings are and the direction they are spinning,   move your hands and arms in the same spinning direction.

Make the continuous spinning movement with your hands and arms a much bigger movement  – and you will experience your good feelings continuing to grow.

#7: Squeeze your thumb and middle finger together

When the good feelings are really strong squeeze your thumb and middle finger together for 8 -10 seconds.

Associating or ‘Anchoring’  these good feelings to this simple physical action will enable you to squeeze your thumb and finger together at any time and in an instant bring those good feelings back.

#8: Work out your plan and  chunk it down

Knowing now how good you’re going to feel when the task is done, work backwards from the desired outcome.

Construct your plan, chunk it down, and see the steps you need to take.

#9: Get started and take consistent action! 

Squeeze your thumb and finger together to refuel the good feelings, and start taking the necessary action.

All the while, keeping your eye on the ‘prize’ and visualising the successful outcome, with a real knowledge of how good it will feel when the deed is finally done! 

 

If you have any questions on the above technique, or with regards to motivation in general, get in touch with me. I will be happy to hear from you; leave your comments and questions below.

The important thing to take on board is that motivation hinges on desire and ‘wanting’.

If you don’t have that desire to do a particular task naturally then seeing the successful end result in your mind will really help!

 

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A Personal Message from Maureen – To Those Challenged by Their Physical Health

I am always very open with my clients that I have physical health challenges and a painful and incurable progressive neurological illness. Yet, despite it all, I have a deep inner peace-  and heartfelt contentment that is secure. I live my life with much joy and passion. I  embrace and greet each day with enthusiasm for living. I do my best to consciously crack and let the light in even when my physical illness throws me into pain, flares and crises and spiralling into the darkest of the dark.

Do I have a message for you if you also live with chronic pain and illness? 

In truth, yes, I do. And today, I feel called to share it. Know my fellow pain or illness warrior, I get you, and I respect you. So reach out to me if I can support or help you in any way.

A Personal Message to those Challenged by Pain and Illness

Live with love. Live with compassion. Live with gratitude. Live with joy. Whatever life throws at you, know you have the strength to handle it. Open your eyes, heart, mind and soul wide. Look for the opportunity in your pain and discomfort; embrace your learning or gift.

Your true power lies within you. Move forwards with trust and faith, one step at a time forwards. Know you only have to deal with the moment you are in now. Focus on living your life and being your best you….

Deep within you, there is a place of wholeness and completeness. Make space for solitude and silence–so you can hear it whisper. Act on it. Take courage and strength from it. Ask yourself who you most need to be now, what you most need to do now. Ask your divine creator what it is you most need to hear…

The health diagnoses and labels you carry do not define you. They are merely the wings you can learn to soar and fly with. So throw off all old mental conditioning or limiting beliefs you hold around your illness, for they no longer serve you well.

You are not your physical body. You are not your mind. You are the unique soul and spirit within you. Know that everything in life does not need to be perfect for you to feel fully alive, complete and whole.

An empowering affirmation as you move forwards:

“I am not my physical body. I am not my self-limiting mind. I am the soul and spirit within. I am me….”

 Three great questions for reflection:

“What do I most need to hear right now?”

“Who do I most need to be right now?”

“What inspired action could I now take?”

Wisdom nugget and take away:

Your pain, illness, health diagnoses and labels – they do not define you.

Your pain, disease, health diagnoses and labels – they are not you!

Step up wholly.

Live life fully.

It’s your time now to throw off the imaginary chains you have seen restrict you and start smiling again, experiencing peace and joy again,  and being the most awesome you.

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Weighed Down By Negative Thoughts or Emotions? Which Wolf Are You Feeding?

For those who know me well, you will know that I am a lover of life, nature, people and animals, and my gorgeous family and amazing husband, Peter. I am also a lover of fables and often relate them within coaching sessions to highlight, inspire or instigate new or different ways of thinking for my clients.

Let me share with you one of my favourites and a fable I often share with my private life coaching and mentoring clients. If you can sometimes feel weighed down by negative thoughts or emotions, self-doubt or anxiety, this good wolf/bad wolf fable is most definitely for you:

An elderly Cherokee Native American Indian was teaching his grandson about life.

He shared a story about the ‘two wolves’ that live inside us all ….

One wolf, the grandfather said, is the good wolf.

The good wolf is kind and caring, and compassionate.

He is happy and joyful, and peaceful.

He always looks for the positive, and despite any challenges that may be going on around him, he does his best to seek the good in everything.

He speaks of the best things, about all that is possible, about overcoming obstacles, living with love, gratitude, joy and peace, about his learning and self-growth.

The other wolf is the bad wolf….

The bad wolf within us is often angry and resentful, envious or bitter–and tends to mainly see the negative things in life and focus or home in on the bad.

The bad wolf speaks of the worst scenarios and outcomes, about why things can’t change for him, is generally pessimistic and talks about how unfair life is.

The old man goes on to say that the two wolves are always fighting each other – and that it’s a fight that often goes on within us all to some extent each day.

The boy thinks for a while and then asks his grandfather:

“If they are always fighting, which wolf wins?”

“Whichever wolf is fed and nourished most, my son. That’s the wolf who wins….”

Personal Development Top Tip:

“Which wolf am I   feeding and nourishing right now?” is a question that is worth asking yourself regularly.

Feed your good wolf more – and you will gradually starve your bad wolf.

You can gently move from a place of fear to faith, from doubt to knowing, from anxiety to calm, from anger to gratitude, from sadness to more joyful living.

You can move with ease and grace towards giving and receiving more heartfelt peace, joy and love.

So stop for a moment and think about which wolf you have been feeding most recently.

Good wolf? Bad wolf? Which one?

Think about your surroundings, the people you mix with, the communication others give you, the experiences you share.

Are your circumstances and others nourishing and feeding that same wolf for you?

It’s time to take ownership of your thoughts and make this year a great one…

I would love to hear your thoughts on this fable, and please do share it with others if you think it would help them start seeing their cup half full rather than half empty.

Any insights or clarity for you? New ways of thinking? What has the good wolf/bad wolf fable brought to light for you? 

Let me know in the comments below. I am always pleased to hear from you and would love to know your thoughts.

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