Malcolm Buckley's Blog, page 2

The Viking Way 'A Walk for Denver'

This is an extraordinary story of immeasurable love between a man and his beloved chocolate Labrador named Denver. To see Denver's pictures with his beautiful face and kind eyes touches the soul. I can't say enough about this heartfelt story, but I highly recommend it. I am honored to have a signed copy from Malcolm Buckley where I have it displayed. On Facebook and Good reads, I give this the Five stars it so deserves.

Thank you Jan x

This certainly brightened up a dull day

Amazon Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars A Wonderful Read!
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on March 9, 2021
Verified Purchase
Thrilled to finally read Malcolm's very personal and beautiful account of his epic journey, in honour of his cherished chocolate Labrador, Denver.
Malcolm's tribute to his much missed and incredibly loved friend and soul mate, is both moving and profound. This is a deeply personal and spiritual pilgrimage, which sees Malcolm triumph through his immense physical and emotional pain. A wonderfully written human story. A true testament to the unbreakable bond between a man and his dog. Wonderful..

Thank you so much whoever you are x

Hi, You are most welcome to my opening blog, by way of introduction…

Having lived on Lincolnshire’s East Coast for nearly forty years, the ‘bracing’ winds and cool air are a far cry from my hometown of Croydon in Surrey, where I grew up and lived till I was 21 years of age.

Being choked by the smog and the smoke, when the opportunity presented itself to move to Lincolnshire, my girlfriend and I did not hesitate to make the move. I secured a job in Skegness, we both gave up jobs in Croydon, my girlfriend became my wife and we left Croydon without truly looking back, all within 6 weeks!

We had 3 boys in 5 years, and today our sons are husbands and fathers in their own right, and the current ‘tally’ of beautiful grandchildren stands at 5.

Aside from being on the coast, with the beach and walks along the sea-front, an area inland became a favorite place of mine to walk. It allowed me to recharge, rebalance and realign at every level.

The Lincolnshire Wolds were designated an ‘Area of Outstanding Natural Beauty (ANOB) in 1973, and are the highest area of land between Yorkshire and Kent. The highest point of Lincolnshire is located just North of Normanby le Wold at approximately 551 feet (168 metres) above sea level.

Anyone that tells you Lincolnshire is flat, has clearly never visited.

I walked for hours whenever I could in the magnificence of The Wolds, and I feel they became a part of me.

In 2008, at the age of 48 I decided it would be wonderful to have a four legged companion with me to walk these hills and valleys.

Enter a gorgeous Chocolate Labrador, I named ‘Denver’ after my favorite singer John Denver.

In essence this blog is a tribute, a testimony to the 9 years and 48 weeks we shared together, until Denver passed on June 3rd 2018.

My book The Viking Way ‘A Walk for Denver’ incorporates my love of walking, along with the devastating grief I felt in the wake of losing Denver.

My 170 mile pilgrimage along The Viking Way, with Denver’s collar in my backpack was intended to help me ‘come to terms’ with his loss, the grief of which was actually threatening my life. I nearly exited this life 3 times, by choice, in the nine months following Denver’s passing, spiraling into a deep, depressive darkness.

This website, this blog and my book, form a part of Denver’s legacy, I feel that the world needs to know of the light that shone from this beautiful, gentle soul, that such a loving being walked among us for so brief a time.

My wish is to share all that Denver taught me, about myself and life in general, the joys and the sorrows and how to deal with life challenges as they arise.

I hope that you will share your own experience with a special dog that touched your life, the memories and reflections presented to you on your own journey.



Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened – Dr Seuss

My Viking Way – with a little help from my friends…

During the training walks and my pilgrimage along The Viking Way, it became evident the natural world was in alignment with my energy, guiding, protecting and helping me along the path, with exceptions as you’ll see in the book!

I instantly recognised birds as my guides and helpers for every single day on the trail.

I’ve always believed birds to be messengers, time and again this belief has been validated throughout my life that I now ‘ know’!

When a loved one dies, it is said they are able to connect with a bird’s soul and ask permission to enter its body in order to deliver a message to their loved ones on earth.

Butterflies and dragonflies also have this ability. This is why seeing a bird after the passing of a loved one could be considered a message of love.

It’s not that the bird is your actual loved one reincarnated, it’s that the soul of your loved one has ‘hitched a ride’ on the bird that has agreed to be the vessel.

St.Francis of Assisi, the patron saint of animals, especially dogs, also considered birds to be his ‘sisters’.

His famous ‘Sermon to the birds, written around 1220 makes it clear of his love and admiration for the bird kingdom.

St. Francis’ Sermon to the Birds

“My little sisters, the birds, much bounden are ye unto God, your Creator, and always in every place ought ye to praise Him, for that He hath given you liberty to fly about everywhere, and hath also given you double and triple rainment; moreover He preserved your seed in the ark of Noah, that your race might not perish out of the world; still more are ye beholden to Him for the element of the air which He hath appointed for you; beyond all this, ye sow not, neither do you reap; and God feedeth you, and giveth you the streams and fountains for your drink; the mountains and valleys for your refuge and the high trees whereon to make your nests; and because ye know not how to spin or sow, God clotheth you, you and your children; wherefore your Creator loveth you much, seeing that He hath bestowed on you so many benefits; and therefore, my little sisters, beware of the sin of ingratitude, and study always to give praises unto God.”

Throughout my walk, there were beautiful instances, all of which I relay in my book, The Viking Way ‘A walk for Denver’.

Robins and Blackbirds were clearly my protectors and would constantly warn me of dangers around the next bend, other times they would sing beautifully so I knew I was safe for a time.

Pheasants, pigeons and butterflies were guides, again my book describes some amazing instances of spiritual guidance.

Bob Marley’s song ‘Three little birds’ came to me on several occasions, and I thanked the birds out loud every time a situation arose.

I was gifted a squeaky soft toy bird by the owner of The Kirkstead Old Mill Cottage near Woodhall Spa during my training walk from Lincoln to Boston along the Water Rail Way path. She told me to squeeze this bird which would then ‘sing’ whenever I needed Denver to come close. It clicked onto my backpack. On my Viking Way, the poor bird was squeezed more than a few times!

The most profound example, during the Viking Way of a birds spiritual presence came just outside Oakham, five minutes out from journey’s end, walking towards my son, Jonathan who was filming on his phone.

On Jonathan's camera footage a Blackbird hops from the grass into the middle of the path between us and stands looking straight towards me.

I believe…no I know this was Denver’s soul meeting me at the end of my amazing journey.

When I noticed this for the first time, I sobbed, happy tears, grateful tears, humble tears, because of all that I had experienced with birds on my walk, and now when I hear Bob Marley sing, ‘every little things gonna be alright’, I know too, this is the truth.

Next time you take a walk in nature, listen closely as our beautiful feathered friends will welcome you into their midst.

The footage can be seen on my website under the same heading as this blog post.

Pilgrimage – A journey of the spirit on a path to the soul…

In my book The Viking Way ‘A Walk for Denver’ I refer to my journey of 170 miles over 12 consecutive days as a Pilgrimage, due to the fact that it was as much an inner journey through my unresolved grief for Denver as it was an outer transient experience of the path itself.

A Pilgrimage is defined by The National Trust as, ‘ a journey or search of moral or spiritual significance, typically to a shrine or location of importance in a person’s beliefs or faith’. A devotional practice consisting of a long and meaningful journey, often undertaken on foot.

I removed myself from my home environment and life conditions for two weeks, and stepped out of the non-stop demands and ‘busy-ness’ of normal life. I Immersed myself into a natural environment, and into a state of ‘being’ rather than ‘doing’.

Walking a long distance path over multi-days keeps you in the present moment at all times, where the opportunity to feel more in tune with self brings a high degree of awareness, empathy, love and compassion for everyone and everything.

I experienced a lifetime of emotions during my 12 days of The Viking Way, due to both the outer conditions around me, and the powerful inner release of prolonged mental stress and emotional grief.

There are generally three stages of personal growth when engaged on a long distance multi-day walk, I will look at those complex stages and the inner transformations they create in my next blog.

Walking every day for weeks or months with nothing more to achieve, brings a level of simplicity to life, The only focus is to get from point A to point B at the end of the day safely, finding food, water and shelter are all the outer conditions life on the path asks of you.

The natural world is a healer, just being in nature, nurtures and empowers a lost soul. My Viking Way walk elevated me high enough from the abyss to the point I could re- stabilize myself , steady every aspect of my being that had been thrown out of balance. It enabled me to find my footing and build on that platform of strength to reach a point of safety emotionally, mentally and spiritually. Prolonged emotional and/or mental stress inevitably becomes physical, bringing potential illness as the immune system weakens. Self-awareness is important here, self-acceptance is crucial. Both are required before action can be taken to prevent a full physical, mental and emotional shutdown.

That’s why going for a walk is a wonderful, healing action to take if the body is under stress and strain.

The path teaches and provides, it allows us to slow down, to heal and to resonate with the rhythm of nature. To illuminate our true journey through life, enabling us to see what really matters, and can gift us a greater sense of our life’s purpose.

A pilgrimage can, and most likely will provide a spiritual revelation, a life changing epiphany without any initiation or demand from self, the natural world and the path itself, always provides what is needed.

Walking a Path of Personal Growth & Transformation

Stepping out of the personal and professional demands of everyday life into a multi-day walk of a long distance path brings about a major shift in thinking. Self perception and outlook of a place in the world becomes changed forever, and almost always for the betterment of self at every level of being.

It does not have to be The Camino de Santiago, across Northern Spain, the Appalachian Trail in the Eastern United States or California’s Pacific Crest Trail for a multi-day walk to provide a permanent shift of personal growth and a life changing transformation.

Stepping out of the normal pace of life, with it’s constant demands of our time and attention, exchanging our fast and noisy everyday environment for the simplicity of the natural world provides us with an immediate deeper connection to self and our surroundings.

Meeting like minded people on the trail, provides a level of community, although paradoxically the trail can provide solitude and ‘space’, if required. Unlike City society where people tend to look at passersby with contempt, even fear, especially these days, passing others on a trail creates immediate acceptance of each other.

Non judgmental becomes a natural state of being, with a code of ‘give not to get’.

There are three stages of personal growth regardless of a 2 week long distance walk or a 6 month multi-day hike.

1)

Over the initial few days the body undergoes physical adjustments in response to the demands made upon it, legs, knees and feet complain, pain and blisters may become walking companions over the next few days.

Muscles become stronger, more defined as the body developes a walking rhythm, aches and pains no longer require attention, blisters heal and grow a tough protective covering.

In essence the body relaxes, posture improves and physically walking 15 – 20 miles a day becomes virtually automatic.

2)

The second state of growth centers on the emotions and mindset. As the physical body relaxes, the mind and emotions begin an inner battle that must be overcome.

Supressed or even repressed feelings rise up from deep within, due to the fact that everyday distractions are now removed from awareness, creating a powerful cathartic experience.

Old, buried shadows and reflections of past ‘wrongdoings’, percived betrayals, personal battles of self-doubt or other elements of uncertainty surface, not to cause pain or added pressure to the walk, but to be cleared permanently, given the opportunity for time and focus to be placed on them in the now.

This stage of growth cannot be bypassed, for to do so would only create a much deeper state of suppression.

Acceptance and direct experience will bannish these ‘ghosts’ of mind and emotions for good.

3)

Having overcome the physcial pains of walking many miles each day, and clearing the mental and emotional blocks that sought to unbalance or immobilise in the second stage, a deeper, yet higher awareness comes into being.

With the mind, emotions and physical body in alignment a spiritual transformation is now possible.

Coinsiding with the end of a long distance walk, a level of self pride, gratitude for the experiences and sadness, due to the walk being over, rises into conscious awareness.

Generally perception of self and others becomes forever changed, it’s possible to not feel like the same person that began the walk, infact it would be rare not to have these new perceptions.

The challenge now is to step back into ‘real life’ without resistance yet with a higher awareness and understanding of self.

A brief excerpt from The Viking Way ‘A Walk for Denver’

I awoke with a jolt, checked my watch, 4.10 am. Something was wrong! I’d been asleep since midnight. He was not in the room. A feeling of dread rose from my stomach and stopped at my heart.

Jumping from the settee, I dashed from the lounge into the dining area. He was lying next to my desk looking absolutely serene and at peace. Looking up at me he thumped his tail a couple of times as I laid down beside him. ” Hey buddy, what are you doing in here then”?

I had no idea how long he’d been there, or what he’d been thinking. I had not slept that long for months. Lying next to ‘Denver’ my beloved Chocolate Labrador now was perfect. Yet, in this moment I did not know he had less than four hours to live.

I cherished the time here to hug him, kiss him and tell him how much I loved him.

I grilled a piece of Salmon, and hand fed it to him on his bed, aware of the unconditional bond of love that bound us together as one. Yet, in this moment, I did not know this would be his final meal. I truly had no sense of what was coming at us, and how soon it would be here.

Book Review: “The Viking Way: A Walk for Denver”

I am so grateful to Dan Santos for this empathetic, compassionate and honest review of my book. What an honour Dan, Thank you so much.

This is one of the most wonderful books about a dog I have ever read.

Denver was a Chocolate Lab, Malcolm Buckley’s best friend for almost 10 years. They had one of those relationships that death cannot touch, but it did. Their bond was one of those that ordinary people cannot understand, so they didn’t. But they did not have to understand it because no one else mattered. And they who mattered understood it and lived it fully until one day death came between their bodies but could not touch their souls.

Some people cannot understand a grown-up man sobbing uncontrollably as he walks alone in the same places they used to walk together. And these places are beautiful and real. The ordinary reader has never experienced the English eastern coast described so exquisitely as Buckley does because his words come from love. The ordinary tourist has never felt the rain fall on them like it falls on the trails Denver and Malcolm walked. They will never enjoy a pint in a pub close to where their memories welded together to form the magical land they used to call theirs. They can’t. The walk belongs to Malcolm and Denver alone.

We Americans may draw a blank at the inner Sea bank at Wainfleet where Malcolm asked his and Denver’s ashes rest some day in a watery grave; or Lincolnshire Wolds around Belchford, Fulletby and Scamblesby where their bond solidified. Few will understand why Malcolm decided to honor Denver’s memory by walking the 147 miles of confusing trails known as The Viking Way. But they don’t have to. He understands it. So does Denver.

Why would a man torture himself on a trek of grief and tears? Only his soul can explain it and won’t until the day they meet again. “Where there is deep grief, there was great love,” writes Buckley as he remembers carrying Denver’s collar throughout the entire pilgrimage. And you know what? Even in the loneliest, most difficult segments of The Viking Way he was never alone.

What a beautiful book from a wonderful person who loves a dog.

Five lovely Stars.

In memory of those who wait at The Rainbow Bridge

They tell you not to cry.

They tell you that it’s just a dog, not a human being.

They tell you that the pain will be over.

They tell you that the animals don’t know that they have to die.

They tell you that it’s important not to let him suffer.

They tell you that you can have another one.

They tell you it’s going to happen to you.

They tell you that there is more pain.

But they don’t know how many times you’ve looked into your dog’s eyes.

They don’t know how many times you and your dog have looked into darkness alone.

They don’t know how many times your dog was the only one who was by your side.

They don’t know how much fear you have
at night when you wake up with your grief.

They don’t know how many times your dog slept near you.

They don’t know how much you’ve changed since the dog has become a part of your life.

They don’t know how many times you hugged him when he was sick.

They don’t know how many times you’ve acted like you didn’t see his hair getting whiter.

They don’t know how many times you’ve talked to your dog, the only one who really hears.

They don’t know that it was just your dog who knew you were in pain.

They don’t know what it feels like to see your old dog trying to get up to say hello.

They don’t know that if things went wrong, the only one who didn’t go is your dog.

They don’t know that your dog trusts you every moment of his life, even in the last.

They don’t know how much your dog loved you and how it is enough for him to be happy, because you loved him.

They don’t know that crying for a dog is one of the most noble, significant, true, purest and warmest things you can do.

They don’t know when the last time you moved him with trouble… making sure it didn’t hurt him.

They don’t know what it felt like to pet their face in the last moments of their life….

In Memory of all those who wait for us at the rainbow bridge. You all have a place forever in our hearts

These are not my words, I just wished to share such beautiful sentiments. I hope you find comfort in them.

Much love

Malcolm

The Viking Way 'A Walk for Denver'

Labrador Lifeline Trust shared a link.
Admin
Just to let you know that The Viking Way is now in our webshop at www.labrador-lifeline.com . All copies have been signed by Malcolm so if you would like one to give as a Christmas present then don't stop go straight from here to the website.
Malcolm very kindly donated these to the shop, and 100% of the cost price helps a Labrador in our care. Free postage as well.