E. Jean Simpson's Blog: A & J PEI Treasures/E Jean Simpson, BEd, BA, MA, page 8

The World of Numbers

Hi and Welcome to the A & J PEI Treasures E Jean Simpson Author Blog Post and Podcast. I’m your host, Jean usually coming to you from the beautiful Province of Prince Edward Island, Canada!! This week, I am on the road live from our neighbours in New Brunswick, Canada! The blog post and podcast is an opinion piece and only reflects this author’s opinion and not that of any other entity. I hold no designations in politics and am a humanitarian and speak from that viewpoint only. Whether you agree or not, at least I hope it makes you think. Today I discuss the new age of the world of numbers or statistics. There are potential drawbacks. It is better you make an informed decision as it could affect your life and I feel some things need to be less available...which cannot be guaranteed online. If you want to find out more, then stay tuned!

The news this week came with a bit of unwelcome information. Apparently a Dept of Health laptop was stolen and though they say that they took steps and risk is low, there are hackers out there that will find a way if it is at all possible to access. The information was of 4000 patients and 1200 staff. https://www.princeedwardisland.ca/en/.... Potentially information of 5200 people on an Island Province of 164,000 people was stolen on a laptop https://worldpopulationreview.com/can.... This is not the first time that privacy has been breached via the online world. It's happened to different places from Government of Canada to huge companies. What does this mean? When it comes to the medical information, it can mean that you have someone who might be accessing your home address, date of birth and other personal information which could be used for nefarious purposes. Do you think the hackers don't have access to the best technology? They say they did what they could to fix the issue, but was it soon enough? So, now 5200 people could have their medical card #, and personal information available to hackers potentially. No saying they could access, no saying they didn't. If they did access, this is a gold mine to scammers. They would pay good money to get that information. Some of it gives access to health care and to other things.

First of all, most banks tell you if you do online banking, not to worry, if your money gets stolen, then they will fix the problem. However, https://www.cbc.ca/news/business/bank... according to the article in the link, this is not always the case. Also, https://www.theguardian.com/money/202... suggests it isn't always that cut and dried. Some people have had to fight to get any money back. So, even this, having numbers and such online can have a cost. This is yet another number. Even if the cost is picked up by the bank, in the long run who do you think is paying for this unfortunate situation? Why do you think things like bank fees go up and such? Many people don't understand that the cost of fraud and the cost of breach of privacy type of things online costs everyone. They figure oh the bank will pick it up. Maybe they will, but where do you think all the money for this comes from? It's not a secret dear readers and listeners...it comes from all of us.

Forbes has an article with tons of statistics for those who like to see numbers. https://www.forbes.com/sites/chuckbro... They mention millions, billions and trillions of dollars. All due to cyber crime. Who do you think pays for this variety of cyber frauds? The cost of goods goes up as a result, the cost of mailing. Companies lose money. People lose their savings. This is all due to breaches in security and cyber fraud of all sorts. With it so widespread and with people calling and pretending to be someone from a bank or a computer company or any other number of frauds perpetuated, I am to the point that I hate doing anything by phone or online.

It seems that there has been fraud since the early ages. We can easily find a quote from Sophocles suggesting, "Rather fail with honor than succeed by fraud." So, they knew of this concept all along. Fraud of various sorts has existed in all countries, all cultures from time immemorial. This does not seem something that we are able to stamp out. It seems as long as there are people vulnerable to dishonesty, there will be fraud. Alan Greenspan is quoted as saying, "Corruption, embezzlement, fraud, these are all characteristics which exist everywhere. It is regrettably the way human nature functions, whether we like it or not. What successful economies do is keep it to a minimum. No one has ever eliminated any of that stuff. " which is a sad commentary on society. It would improve the world a great deal if we could find a cure for this. It is a form of greed and much like illness can take over people's lives.

Of course there are other things affected by cyber crime and cyber fraud. According to Ron Lewis, "Identity theft involving these cards is a growing form of white collar crime, facilitating illegal immigration, banking and accounting fraud, tax evasion, and other nefarious activities." So, not only do we pay for it with money, but it is the crime that keep on giving so to speak. So, fraud pays for illegal activity, which makes for more fraud. People think they are getting away with something and they are getting something for nothing. However, this is not true. Anyone who pays taxes is paying for the need to have better cyber security for Government. If you buy goods from stores that have an online portion, you may also be paying for the fraud that they have to absorb. Even buying in store, you are paying as well for people shop lifting. Then there are the people who are being stolen from. Not everyone gets their life back and not everyone can go to a bank to get their money back. There are people who misuse information and lie to steal from people. Some poor people can lose their life savings. Some people buy into dishonest schemes thinking that they are going to make money. They do not usually make a lot off of it if anything. Often they lose their money. So, there are not only the dishonest that get involved. Sometimes people who are desperate for money get involved and do not find out until they too have lost over it. There are pyramid schemes, fake sale sites. So many ways that people find to perpetuate fraud on their fellow humans.

So, there is a high cost and I only discuss some of the ways. I don't even touch upon some of the ways that they misuse information that hurts everyone. For example, my account on Facebook got locked because I had my cell phone broken and I couldn't get the code sent to me. When I tried to get it back, they told me to give them my passport to get it back or other form of ID. You have to be kidding. I gave them my library card to test out....strangely enough this was not acceptable. I was not about to give a social networking site my official documentation copied or otherwise and there was no way they were going to get my SIN (Social Insurance Number) either. Others want SIN online. You've got to be joking. I avoid putting too much of my information online. It scares me. I don't want to help people who are using information in a dishonest way.

The major thing I can suggest is that before you give out information to someone think about what it might be used for. No one should be asking online information like SIN etc. Even selling books, if you won't give the USA the SIN, they can just take out the tax.
It is not something you have to give to anyone except Government. Even that, I'm wary about online. Most companies have been hacked. Banks are not immune, obviously from the start of this article, Governments are not immune. Just make sure to think about what you are giving for information and why you are giving it. No company and no entity online is immune from being hacked. Too many numbers are arbitrarily given out online for my comfort. But, each person must decide for themselves. Just make sure you know why you are doing it and if it seems worthwhile to you.

Thanks for listening to my podcast and/or reading my blog post and thanks for your interest in A & J PEI Treasures!

Keep watching for more e-books and more formats! We’re always working on something. Thank you!

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E. Jean Simpson

One Person's Perspective: The Health Care Crisis in Eastern Canada

Hi and Welcome to the A & J PEI Treasures E Jean Simpson Author Blog Post and Podcast. I’m your host, Jean usually coming to you from the beautiful Province of Prince Edward Island, Canada!! This week, I am on the road live from our neighbours in New Brunswick, Canada! The blog post and podcast is an opinion piece and only reflects this author’s opinion and not that of any other entity. I hold no designations in politics and am a humanitarian and speak from experience and from that viewpoint only. Whether you agree or not, at least I hope it makes you think. Today I discuss the Health Care Crisis that is going on in Eastern Canada. I specify because I've lived on both ends of our beautiful Country and it might be bad in other areas, but in the Maritimes/Atlantic Canada it seems worse. It's from my perspective having lived on both sides of the country! if you want to find out more, then stay tuned!

Let me start off by saying that I knew things were a bit more difficult on the East Coast when I decided to move back home. I had been living in Edmonton but my heart has always been home (the East Coast). In Edmonton, I had very little problem to find a doctor. I had a specialist and a doctor. Emergency is rough all over. I've had serious illnesses while in Alberta and was left in Emergency for hours. That doesn't change. Depending on how big the area and triage. For example, I was very ill at one time. They marked it down that I was 'just having a bad period' at least that is what I heard them saying as I walked away. By the time I saw someone, I had been in pain for hours. Barely able to sit down. They got a newer specialist to see me. Her comment on the way in was chipper enough. They had done some tests and she announced that her "goal was that she wanted to make sure I didn't bleed out on her tonight". Yes, give or take exactly the words. I ended up having serious surgery and it took a long time to get well. The triage system puts a tag and that's what decides when you see someone. There is some danger in that. But, that's the system.

Fast forward to a few weeks ago. I got a call that my mother was in hospital and the family needed help when she got out. I knew my father in his late 80's was left alone. My mother in her early 80's was in hospital. So, my husband and I decided to drop me at my parent's house and he would stay home and I would stay with my parents and help out. This was a Province away drive. I get here and they guestimate the hopsital stay for someone who was in their 30's. It takes double the time for the elderly. This was not avoidable. It did set my father's expectations higher than they should have, but in the meantime, I could make sure my father was eating regular meals with some healthy quality to it. We called to see if we would be allowed to visit. Apparently there was only one person in the whole of the hospital to be able to say if one could visit or not. It was on a Friday. They were away for the weekend before we found out this was a possibility. So, we had to wait until Monday. On Monday, she would only be there a day or two more so did we mind to wait. It was the surgery floor, so I can understand the reluctance. Didn't want to drag in COVID or something to the people who just had surgery. That could be deadly. But, it took multiple calls to even have this decided. All those highly qualified people and not one with an ounce of authority or allowed to explain. I have to say, I'm not entirely unable to comprehend. I'm highly educated. I just had health issues that forced early retirement. Seemed strange to me that I had to wait 3 or so days for someone to explain that please wait to me.

Finally, my mother was released. At least we were called by the hospital and they said she was released. My father got there, they are under staffed, it's not easy for them. I want to be clear, the staff that they have are top notch and the paramedics etc...are all top of the line professionals. I thank them very much for their service and I feel bad they have to deal with lack of staff, over work etc. and some people blaming them for what they have to do to follow the rules they are given. There was only one nurse that was aware that she was being released and she was done for the day and gone I think. No one seemed to know anything. No one was informed. So, he had someone waiting thinking she would be ready when he got there. The person had to wait and wait. She had other business to attend to. The problems now have reached the stage where the staff are suffering, the patients are suffering and anyone who does a favour for someone is made to wait unnecessarily. This problem doesn't just affect the patient...it affects everyone!

So, my Mother was home two days and doing we thought , well, (I'm not a doctor) but then she got pains. The Paramedic was here in no time (lives close). He came took a look at her and called an ambulance. The Ambulance got here. Very professional staff. Came in checked over my Mother and decided to take her to the hospital. They were in a bad situation. We didn't know, but the Emergency didn't have enough staff and were only taking dire emergencies. Now, we're in the middle of a long weekend and they have Emergency almost closed. This is a large area. Long weekends are the worst time to have short staff. It's when a lot of accidents tend to happen. People home, BBQ, doing house and yard stuff, having parties. Yet, almost no Emergency department. Between COVID and everything, the staff are just overworked and no rhyme or reason to when things are done. They must be pulling out their hair.

I was up half the night calling to see if they had any information. It was after midnight after all that stress when they finally told me that she was still being tested and I should call in the morning. I called several more times the next day. Doctor wasn't available until mid-afternoon. They get an emergency, then patients are waiting hours and hours. It can't be helped, I understand this. Mid to late afternoon, I finally got word that she was comfortable and they removed the stuff from surgery and she would be staying a few days.

So, my mother was left in Emergency. Not enough beds, they couldn't find a bed for her. She is in early 80's and father is in his late 80's. So, we have a situation where the hospitals are understaffed, the authorities that pay for the hospitals are saving every cent and it's going to be killing people. It is as bad or worse on the Island. I have no doctor, no specialist. I have medical conditions. There, they seem to sign on either people who are ready to retire or they do, apparently from what I was told by one doctor...contracts. So, by the time they see you, they can only follow you for 3 months but I think the contract is almost a year or so. What good does that do? I'm back on the list for an actual doctor, but then so are 22,000 other people (https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/prince...) To put this in some sort of perspective, there are over 164,00000 people on the Island so that works out to around 1 of every 7 people on the Island have no doctor ( https://worldpopulationreview.com/can...). Specialists seem still able to write their own ticket yet. Now you tell me, if you are a doctor or a nurse and you graduate from medical school assuming you're able to do the job, you get offered a long term job somewhere with medical coverage, whatever benefits including retirement and then you are offered something in a little place on contract, which would you take? The one that has a contract and you don't get medical, you don't get perks or retirement so why, unless you didn't get another offer, would you take it? You'd take the one that offers you full job. I can't blame them for that. If you take the contract, then you're likely to take it just long enough to get a job in one of the better offer places. Doctors, I would presume aren't foolish, they aren't going to go for contract work when they can get a real job with benefits and retirement. Who wouldn't?

What I find is that everyone is complaining. Now, they also seem to want to blame people. How is this sorting anything out? From what little I hear, the doctors and the nurses are frustrated and tired. They aren't at fault for this. They deserve good pay, good treatment. They deserve not to be worked like dogs too. The same goes for other important things like fire etc. Anyway, they are not at fault. The people who are sick or have medical conditions are not at fault. They didn't ask for it. It is not the fault of the paramedics etc. From what I saw, all of them are top notch at the hospital and hard working. They seem to know their ethics and that they can't just get information from anyone at the hospital nor give it out. It isn't allowed by the ethics. That I can understand. They know the rules and that makes them top notch professionals. At first, one of the calls I made to the hospital, they told me they couldn't release information to me, just to my father. My mother had added me a long time ago so it seems that the information isn't available in the hospital. So, I said, that's funny, I never had this problem before...slightly inaccurate as the first time ever, they had to get my mother's permission, but no trouble after that. They then put me through. So, in the hospitals, it seems only one or two know things and the rest have no access to do their jobs. Now, how can they do their jobs?

They finally let her out of hospital. Short one card of her medication and one of her medicare cards. Now, this worries me on a few levels. Most easy is what does this mean they are not doing inventory of patient property? This would be bad. Are they using the pills for her and just no one knows? Not a happy prospect either. Or third…is there an issue with pills? So, any of these not happy thoughts. This makes it something should be looked into and policies made.

So, my beloved Canada, what we are doing to our elderly, what we are doing to ourselves, what we are doing to our professionals, what we are doing to each other? It is not right. Nurses and Doctors shouldn't be so hard to find or get but they will be if not treated like human beings too. Do you think you can just buy health?? As Roy T. Bennett said, "Top 15 Things Money Can’t Buy Time. Happiness. Inner Peace. Integrity. Love. Character. Manners. Health. Respect. Morals. Trust. Patience. Class. Common sense. Dignity.” I agree, we should not be made to live like animals in our own country. Yes, we are not the richest Provinces. Yes, we have been poorer than the other Provinces. However, you can't get back your health once it's gone and leaving people to die like animals when they are older is not right. We need to have compassion for all. We need to have health care available to all. Health care should not be just for the rich or the well. It should be for all of Canada. It should never matter who you are or what you do for a living. I know for a fact, a high up gets hurt, (I'm thinking of a Premier of Alberta it hit the news back then), they take him right in, treat him right away, then they have no idea there are problems. I got treated right away, they say. I think hurt a rib or something. I forget the details. But this is just an example. Every human being is important! Right now, I have to deal with a computer to get my medication. They say I have to see a doctor because they have to do tests...but I don't have a doctor. I thought that was what the computer was for. It gave me access to a doctor. I'd love to have a doctor that would be respectful. I won't even tell you about my last experiences with the doctors on the beautiful Island Province. It would curl your hair. So, someone needs to advocate for the patients. Someone needs to advocate for our elderly. Some elderly can't feed themselves. They need help. Remember, the elderly are our living history and deserve respect! Remember some day you may be elderly.

Now, I can only speak from my perspective of English Canadian from the Maritimes. What I can tell you is that many of us don't complain and we take it and take it. We're used to things being rough. But, to be used as door mats to the political system and allow it to take over our hospitals....what are we thinking?!! To have people who have no thought about how their decisions affect the lives of others. The Crisis here is one of common sense and common decency. Not on the part of the doctors, nurses and paramedics, but on the part of the Government and the highest echelons of the hospital system..not the hospitals themselves. However, I'm sure if the doctors and nurses were involved in decision making, things would be changed for the better. There needs to be something done. I've heard that more than once. I cannot do it alone. You cannot do it alone. But together we can change the sytem. We have a voice. We forget this. We forget that we have the vote. We forget that we have a tongue with which to speak. We remember it long enough to complain amongst ourselves, but we need to do more. We need to get petitions, we need to call our MLA's and MP's. We need to take it to Legislature. Let everyone in Government know that the health care system is in trouble and you're willing to vote for whoever is going to fix it. If they say they are going to and do nothing...kick them out the next election. Sooner or later, they will belive that you mean what you say. They will start to say what they mean and maybe we can save our health care system which has top notch workers before they murder it. The life you are saving could be your own or that of one of your loved ones. Lots of stuff we can live with, but without our health, we're not any good to anyone. You may or may not agree, but at least I hope you will think about it!

Thanks for listening to my podcast and/or reading my blog post and thanks for your interest in A & J PEI Treasures!

Keep watching for more e-books and more formats! We’re always working on something. Thank you!

The poscast that matches this blog post is on Anchor FM to name one: https://anchor.fm/a--j-pei-treasures/...

Our Blog Posts are available on

WordPress: https://wordpress.com/sites/aandjpeit... and

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Podcast are available on Anchor FM in a variety of formats: https://anchor.fm/a--j-pei-treasures

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Podchaser: https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/e-...

Amazon: https://music.amazon.ca/podcasts/879a...

All my e-books can be found on:

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E. Jean Simpson

Perspective

Hi and Welcome to the A & J PEI Treasures E Jean Simpson Author Blog Post and Podcast. I’m your host, Jean usually coming to you from the beautiful Province of Prince Edward Island, Canada!! This week, I am on the road live from our neighbours in New Brunswick, Canada! The blog post and podcast is an opinion piece and only reflects this author’s opinion and not that of any other entity. Today I discuss reality and how there isn't just one reality. If you want to find out more, then stay tuned…!

I have found over time that very often information may or may not be passed on accurately or with the same ideas and meanings. This does not mean that someone is lying. It is sometimes a matter of perspective. Family perspectives often vary and it depends on who you are talking with whether or not it is a negative or postive one. It doesn't seem to matter which person you talk to in the family. Someone with a more negative mindset can tell the story and blow you away by telling you things are the opposite to what you thought. You can develop a whole new idea of what happened. History is like that too. Remember that history is often told from the side of the victor. This means that you get the ideas from ancient history such as Tudor reign from the Tudor side. It wasn't a healthy thing to disagree with Henry VIII and many people found themselves a head shorter for being on the wrong side of that time period. So, now they are looking at history with a different mindset. Just be careful with history that you are not taking in a modern mindset. Some things seem weird that weren't intended to be at that time. With that in mind, I will explain a little more on perspectives.

Perspectives or how we look at things may be different between every generation and every family. I have often said that if you don't expect anything from anyone and you don't expect to be thanked, you will never be disappointed. This is not a negative perspective. One needs to realize that people are people. Whether or not they agree with what you think or they disagree, they will have their own perspective on things and if you expect what you would expect from yourself from other people, you may find yourself disappointed. Not everyone sees things the same and not everyone is thankful. They may understand that something long ago was done to hurt someone or because they weren't cared for. When in fact, the situation was a difficult one and people were trying to do the best thing for everyone. They don't often understand that down the road, it could be misperceived. No one thinks to explain it to the person who was caught in the middle of the situations with little or no information.

As Gary Zukav says, “Reality is what we take to be true. What we take to be true is what we believe. What we believe is based upon our perceptions. What we perceive depends upon what we look for. What we look for depends upon what we think. What we think depends upon what we perceive. What we perceive determines what we believe. What we believe determines what we take to be true. What we take to be true is our reality.” So, when you get someone's perspective on something, it might not be entirely true from your perspective. So, how do we keep some kind of order in all this chaos. It's not always that easy. You see, I got the same story from two different people at one time. They were very differing stories. However, I also knew that not only were there two different stories, but I knew that each person believed the version they told so there was no lying involved. The younger of the two was seeing his version from the viewpoint of someone who had been hurt by the situation. The older one was not emotionally invested in the situation and had no reason to judge the people involved. Their story was somewhat different, but I knew it was the same situation. I knew there was no lying involved. I was looking at things from a perspective of not knowing anyone else involved in the situation. So, I could tease out the things that led to finding a 3rd more balanced view. This view of course was my perspective and was slightly different from both.

As Marcus Aurelius is credited with saying, “Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.” So, how do you know something is reality? How do you know what is truth? Is there actual truth? This is a question that has been asked for as long as people have been able to sit and philosophize. What do we know about reality? Surprisingly there are different factors that can affect reality and it is very complex.

Philip K. Dick said, "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn’t go away." As good a definition of reality as any, I would suppose. Some go by anything you can smell, see, hear or feel is real. This would be good, except that there are things like optical illusions which means that you can see something, but it is not necessarily just one thing. https://onextrapixel.com/50-amazing-o... These prove that you might not always have accurate perception. In other words, what you see might not always be the only thing there. Try a few of them. You'll find that you may see a person or animal, but there is a second thing you can see or someone else can see and you might not be able to. So, in this case, what you perceive to be there isn't what someone else might perceive. This now explains the idea that reality is different between more than one or more people. Now you understand the idea that reality is a little more complex than one would think.

As Robert Evans said, “There are three sides to every story: your side, my side, and the truth. And no one is lying. Memories shared serve each differently.” Sometimes there is more than 3 views depending on how many people are looking at the situation. Now, I think that Evans is kind of throwing out the baby with the bath water as I think there is some acceptable versions of truth that exist for some things. Just be aware of the fact that there is a difference between someone remembering differently and someone who is lying. I find that one of the surest ways of getting at the heart of the matter is to get a few different perspectives and tease out the various factors that are in some ways in agreement. Then what you have left over is the chance to put together yet another reality. Now is this the truth or just another reality? I would hope that the optical illusions has helped you to think about how some people will see things differently from others and that you might not have the same reality, but experience the same thing just differently from how you see it. The problem with life is that you don't get your choice of which reality you listen to and it is not always that you are lucky enough to get the same story from two different people. Sometimes you have to take into account things like who is the one giving you the information. Sometimes people are reliable in what they say and sometimes they see things in a way that might not be the exact way things happened.

In general people tend to accept the reality that they are presented with. This is why I like the following quote, by Jacqueline Susann, “Never judge anyone by another's opinions. We all have different sides that we show to different people.” Think of the optical illusions when you are tempted to accept everything you hear. Things like gossip, different perceptions and lies have ruined people's lives. Until you have a good grasp of the truth and the things that affect each person's perception, you cannot be a good judge of a person. Some people tend to create a reality using what they know. They tend to not always have the entire story. It is best, if you are in doubt, to stay out of the situation until or unless you have both sides of the story or are willing to live with the consequences to your actions. The sad part is when people accept all they hear and it harms another. I hope that this blog post and podcast will give you something to think about so that you are less likely to make that mistake. Much like any institution out there, it is created by human beings. This is what makes reality and the world at large such a complicated place. With each person, there is a different perception and a slightly different reality. We have certain agreed upon constructs in our vairous areas, but in the end, we are what we see, what we do, what we say and that is what we know about everyone else in our lives. Make sure you use this power wisely.

Thanks for listening to my podcast and/or reading my blog post and thanks for your interest in A & J PEI Treasures! The podcast that matches this blog post can be found on Anchor FM: https://anchor.fm/a--j-pei-treasures/...

Our Blog Posts are available on

WordPress: https://wordpress.com/sites/aandjpeit... and

GoodReads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show...

Podcast are available on Anchor FM in a variety of formats: https://anchor.fm/a–j-pei-treasures

iHeart Radio: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-e-...

Podchaser: https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/e-...

Amazon: https://music.amazon.ca/podcasts/879a...

All my e-books can be found on:

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/E.-Jean-Simpso...

Smashwords (my Affiliate link): https://www.smashwords.com/profile/vi... or https://www.smashwords.com/profile/vi...
E. Jean Simpson

What are Your Under Age Kids up to?

Hi and Welcome to the A & J PEI Treasures E Jean Simpson Author Blog Post and Podcast. I’m your host, Jean usually coming to you from the beautiful Province of Prince Edward Island, Canada!! This week, I am on the road live from our neighbours in New Brunswick, Canada! The blog post and podcast is an opinion piece and only reflects this author’s opinion and not that of any other entity. Today I discuss something that we really need to give some consideration to. If you want to find out more, then stay tuned…!

As a kid, when we walked out the door, the question was always where are you going? Who are you going to be with? When do we expected you home or alternatively be home by supper? Or some variation thereof. As we got older, it shorted to who we were going to be with. In those days it was a lot easier than it is now. Now, your teens and tweens could be online with anyone…literally. They could be watching anything, literally. Do you know what your kids are up to? The questions and answers that were there when I was a teen and tween had very easy answers. I’m not even sure what questions are being asked now.

I know that there needs to be a more serious look at the questions we ask our tweens and teens. I’m not sure if parents are as aware of the issues that could be coming up. I remember hearing about a girl in my old home town…she got in a truck with someone and was never seen alive again https://globalnews.ca/news/8107697/ba.... This was a terrible tragedy for the family and her friends. We need to look at how to prevent these tragedies . To date they haven't found her. (correction from misinformation or misreading article - apologies to family and friends of the victim.) If you have any information contact the RCMP. They want to bring her home! It doesn’t bring back this life. She was too young to be getting involved with a grown man. There is always the ‘privacy’ of your kids and trusting your kids issue. However, kids in the tween and teen years are not necessarily processing using adult brain functioning. https://www.apa.org/news/press/releas... and there seems to be differing ages between 16-21 according to this wikki article https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maturit... and https://mentalhealthdaily.com/2015/02... . So, this is important to consider when you are concerned about your child’s welfare. Privacy is good for some things. Taking with friends, etc. Know who their friends are.

Recently locally, I have seen an article where a 14 year old child was lying about her age and got involved with a 23 year old man https://atlantic.ctvnews.ca/pei-mount... . The other girl that was murdered that I discuss from my old home town, she was also similar age. Neither has the mental maturity to deal with the issues that were caused by their choices. These are not the only cases. They pop up on even a rudimentary search. A lot of these meet these people online that the parents don't know and never met. It is not only girls that are victimized. There are also males in the same age range. They get a steady diet of TV shows and videos that glorify relationships, yet they don’t have the mental maturity to think through the end results of their actions. They don’t think that so and so who talks with them online might be older, might be prone to doing harm, that they might be hurt or worse. I don’t want to make parents paranoid, but it’s not easy to raise teens and tweens and the last thing you want to find out is that they’ve been sending sexts and pictures of suggestive nature around the internet. Their life depends on having some interest in their online life.

Now, I will take flack for this if anyone feels that strongly about a 14 year old’s privacy, but I would rather a safe and angry 14 year old than an injured or dead one any day. Parents seem to think it is imperative that they be the best buddy of their tween and teen. I can tell you from experience as a tween or teen. I have a lot more respect for my mother for her teaching boundaries and not always trying to be my best friend. She taught me that I needed to think through my actions. It didn’t happen over night. It was a job that my mother took seriously. If we did something in school, as a school teacher she knew it. She took classes at night with other teachers some of whom were our teachers. She was in no way a severe mother nor was she nosy. She did know who are friends were. She either knew the parents of the friends or met them. She made sure we knew the difference between right and wrong before we left home for University. What we did thereafter was our responsibility and I know in my later teens, I didn't always make stellar decisions.

I remember her taking me to a bank and making me do a withdrawal or deposit and making sure I could fill out the paperwork. She had been embarrassed for the mother of another kid that had gone to University before me and they discovered she didn’t know how to do it. Mom learned from the mistakes of others as well as from her own. She was not a strict disciplinarian, but if she knew something, like there was a child coming on the bus that might be given a rough time she would instruct us to be nice to them. If there was a child unlikely to get a valentine, she instructed us to make one for them as well. At our house everyone in our class got a Valentine from us, for example. Some of you like to call it Christian Charity, others call it common decency, no matter what you call it, there needs to be more of it.

Please, parents, learn from the mistakes of other parents. Learn from the disasters that have happened to other children. Make sure you know who your kids are interacting with. They might just be nice people, but if they start sending ‘sexual messaging’ or start asking for inappropriate things, then you need to be able to step in and quick. It doesn’t need to be a big deal, there must be some legitimate way of doing this as a parent. If you are at a loss, check with your local internet providers. Your children’s safety is everyone’s business and MOST especially your business. Support your child. If they are different for some reason, make sure they aren’t being bullied or learning to bully. Make sure that they are interacting with appropriate ages. Older people might act as role models, but keep an eye on this that it doesn't become manipulated. Despite the number of shows that they did showing kids getting the tar scared out of them for leaving strangers in the house or dangers of sexting etc. Kids seem to think they are indestructible. They think it won’t happen to them because they are smarter or more mature or more capable of taking care of themselves. If they are not taught responsibility, that they are responsible for what they say or do. If they are not capable of understanding reality. If your kid is adult age, but there are special needs that put them at risk, they will need a bit of supervision.

According to this article, it is within bounds to do some monitoring of your child’s social media and there are some ideas in the article. I think when it comes to safety, if you think that your child is potentially going to endanger themselves or others, then one needs to be aware but not everyone agrees to what extent. https://raisingchildren.net.au/pre-te....

So, parents, I ask you, are you comfortable with your tween or teen corresponding with someone who is much older? Kids have always had the propensity to inflate their age. They want to be grown up. On the side of the parents, we want to make sure they do grow up…in their own time. They don’t have the skills to stay out of trouble and if unmonitored, it can result in trouble. They can even agree to meet people they barely know. When should you start working with your kids and their social media? I think you need to start working with your kids from birth. If you do, you’ll never regret it. Show them proper life boundaries. You are the ones that have to do the training. You do it by your actions. If you want better kids, you need to be better people. Not everything is that cut and dried. I know that some parents do everything and still there are issues. No one said parenting is easy, but avoid some of the pitfalls from the beginning.

As Sanam Saeed said, “We need to start identifying the triggers that aggravate mental health issues in our society - bullying, social media negativity and anxiety, gender based violence, substance abuse, stigma around issues such as maternal issues, etc., and we need to speak up about these more and get to the source of the problems." These could fill another day. Social media does have its place in our society. It should not be the babysitter, it should not be the only place that your kids go. Have them develop interests and abilities outside of the internet. Have them develop friendships.

As I said earlier, I don’t want to frighten parents, however, I do want them to be aware for themselves and their children that not everyone is who they appear to be online. I’ve seen profiles of people whose pictures are computer generated. Not everyone are who they say they are. I spend some time online as part of the A & J PEI Treasures day. If I can see fake profiles, computer generated profile pictures, then be aware that they are out there. The internet is not all bad. There are a lot of things that people can use to learn. There are puzzles and craft ideas for example. There is a cornucopia of information. At the same time there is a cornucopia of misinformation. To be forewarned is to be forearmed.

Thanks for listening to my podcast and/or reading my blog post and thanks for your interest in A & J PEI Treasures! The podcast matching this blog post is on Anchor FM: https://anchor.fm/a--j-pei-treasures/...

Our Blog Posts are available on

WordPress: https://wordpress.com/sites/aandjpeit... and

GoodReads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show...


Podcast are available on Anchor FM in a variety of formats: https://anchor.fm/a--j-pei-treasures iHeart Radio: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-e-...

Podchaser: https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/e-...

Amazon: https://music.amazon.ca/podcasts/879a...

All my e-books can be found on:

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/E.-Jean-Simpso...

Smashwords (my Affiliate link): https://www.smashwords.com/profile/vi... or https://www.smashwords.com/profile/vi...

Keep watching for more e-books and more formats! We’re always working on something! Thank you!
E. Jean Simpson

$50 Dress and Lady Gaga

Hi and Welcome to the A & J PEI Treasures E Jean Simpson Author Blog Post and Podcast. I’m your host, Jean coming to you from the beautiful Province of Prince Edward Island, Canada!! The blog post and podcast is an opinion piece and only reflects this author’s opinion and not that of any other entity. What do a $50 dress and Lady Gaga have to do with each other? First I have a lot of respect for Lady Gaga so it isn’t a critique. If you want to find out more, then stay tuned…!

So, what could a $50 wedding dress and Lady Gaga have in common? At first it seems like nothing. But, if I didn’t have any point to the story, I wouldn’t have started this. So sit back and enjoy this round about story with a moral to it.

I have noticed a trend that just keeps getting bigger and crazier. It makes no sense to me, but when I found a Quora question on how to respond to someone who didn’t like their wedding dress, I knew society had a strange problem. The questions was how to react to someone who didn’t like their wedding dress. There were statements about making snide remarks, etc. I found that disturbing. People nowadays spend more on a wedding dress than most people spent on a car when I got married (1980’s). Of the limited number of weddings I attended or had to give regrets to and see pictures later, most of the dresses were done with an eye to the budget. We didn’t want to put our parents in the poor house and we did what we could at the time. My sister-in-laws had family help out and make the dress. They had tasteful and beautiful dresses that meant something to them. I was going to use my mother’s dress, but after some attempts to make it fit me better, she had decided I could splurge and get a wedding dress. We were in a different Province at the time. I took my husband to the store that was having a sale. There was no appointment, there was no budget thing no big yes to the dress or audience…though there were a few shocked people that I didn’t bring a posse or girlfriends with me and that my husband would be seeing the dress. We were looking for a suitable dress for our wedding. We did all the planning. We found one. It was $50 had some lace and long sleeves and covered me. I liked it well enough. For $50, I loved it.

Now, for the reception. We didn’t rent out the local castle or whatever place or go to an exotic location. There was a little hall. It had orange curtains. Most people rented out their church hall with whatever coloured curtains that entailed. In the case of my sister in laws, they and family did the decorating. The cake was baked by someone…sorry that eludes me. You didn’t go out to tastings. Even far from family, you just got a regular wedding cake no 25 flavour tests. I likely had the least family hands on wedding as all the family were in different areas. We had to go order the invitations, order the cake...it was all up to us to do it…we didn’t have some exotic wedding planner hovering around…and neither did my sister-in-laws. We had to make sure everything was done. The family helped with the events, one of my sister-in-law’s cake had an unfortunate incident. The two brothers were bringing the cake to the location. There was a fast stop. The cake fell onto the passenger. They went to the house of one of the parents in tears that this happened. The family member fixed the issues…the cake was brought to the reception…likely the direction was made so pictures wouldn’t show the unfortunate incident but that is the last I heard of the incident and I doubt it is given much thought now. I think the point of this is that weddings are made to be special, and yet things can happen. Weddings should not be the kind of special that puts everyone in the poor house and gives bragging rights for a short time. It is special because there is love between two people and their families and friends. Not a public relations event. Some people have forgotten the reason for weddings and watch too much media event stuff and shows with people who have money and a bank roll to be able to do whatever they need to get a dress that colleagues and stars will ‘remember’. What about the memories with family and friends? Another sister-in-law, I helped wrapped the cake that they give out at the wedding. I happened to still be in the Province when this one took place.

Flash forward to our wedding. My brother in law’s dog got run over while they were out of town for my wedding. Of course no one thought to wait and tell him until after the wedding. He was a real stand-up guy and things still went forward. I had requested long dresses because I knew my mother would find something classy. My mother in law chose tea length. This caused a bit of trouble as my mother was upset that she had not been told. I had to tell her that I had just found out…which I had and what was I supposed to do? Mom wore her dress, Mother in law wore hers. Disaster between the Moms averted. The Maid of Honour wore a long dress I had chosen for her with a flowered headpiece. I knew it would look amazing on her and it did. It also was on sale. She was a student at the time and couldn’t have afforded a dress. Of course there was someone going around after the wedding and during pictures telling any people who would listen (including some passerby) that I would regret the choice of wedding dress later as it didn’t suit me. Of course someone had to report this to me. I wasn’t happy about it. What did I do? Absolutely nothing. Yes, absolutely nothing…what would be the gain…bad feelings, temporary feeling of justification or I could just ignore it and move along. It was my day, I had chosen my dress. I was happy enough with it. I wasn’t there to make someone else happy about my dress. It didn’t cost as much as a car so perhaps I was less invested, but it cost enough and I didn’t want to put my parents in the poor house. I didn’t cause a huge blow up or a family drama. Of course you’re not happy that someone chooses to talk trash your choices…especially when your husband was one of those choices…but hey, to each their own.

Here is where Lady Gaga comes in and the importance of something she said. I remember lately catching old footage of Lady Gaga being interviewed by someone about making a statement on whether she had male parts or not (they were more blunt). I was favourably impressed by her somewhat blunt answer, but it more or less came down to …”who cares”. I leave out unfavourable language and am just translating the statement. The point is that Lady Gaga is a star. It doesn’t change talent…whether or not there is a male part in the mix or there are partial male parts is actually irrelevant. Much like whether someone or another didn’t like my wedding dress. It was over 35 years ago and I’m still married to the same man. I made the choice, I wore it. It wasn’t a horror. Over 35 years of marriage makes it the right choice…no matter what anyone thought. It doesn’t change the dress for me. It doesn’t change the wedding or the love I had and still have for my husband. It didn’t change the fact that a really good friend came from Toronto to be there for me and another come to be my maid of honour and some family came. It was sharing love whether I wore a $10,000 dress or my $50 dress. Don’t forget what a wedding is about. It is about commitment of love for another person. A commitment of family time and energy. You don’t have to spend the earth to get to that point. You aren’t less married in a $50 dress or more married in an expensive dress. The dress is only as important as you make it. It is only going to ruin your day if you let someone do that. Nothing ruined my day. Nothing happened that could. It wasn’t the attitude of someone else that ran my wedding, it was our love for each other.

I think one of the main points to this is that it is only one day. It is only one event. Though undeniably an important day and event, how you handle yourself and the memories you create are important. You can choose to let one incident destroy it, or you can move forward. I showed coworkers at the time pictures of the wedding…and the only comment to come from one of them…he’s not wearing the right socks. LOL…Believe me when I tell you that in your life, you will have opportunity to create other memories and have other events. There will also be other people who will critique it. If you let that ruin your day, then you will have a long unhappy life because there will always be someone ruining your day…everyone from before, during and after the event and from then on. I laugh at those incidents now. Lady Gaga proves that that you can’t change things and it doesn’t matter what you wear or do. Lady Gaga proves it at every concert and with every album and in her refusal to get dragged into drama unless it is necessary. You don’t have to be Lady Gaga to reduce the stress and the drama in your life. You just have to be honest with yourself what is important to you. Be honest with yourself with what is important to your life. If it is worth it for whatever reason that you want a $15,000+ dress, and you can afford it, more power to you. I don’t say it is a bad thing, I just say make sure you choose what is important for you. Don’t worry about what someone else says about what you are wearing. If you like it, you can afford it and you enjoy it, then who cares what someone else thinks…as long as it is covering and not considered indecent exposure, it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. It doesn’t take an expensive wedding dress or venue or anything else to make a wedding…nor to make a life. Memories will make your life and if you live long enough you will have many and pictures to remember by. Choose which memories you want to make and don’t let others choose them for you or destroy them for you. Not everyone has an unlimited wedding budget. Some can and some can’t. It shouldn’t stop you from being able to make some memories.

Thanks for listening to my podcast and/or reading my blog post and thanks for your interest in A & J PEI Treasures!

The Podcast matching this Blog Post is available on Anchor FM: https://anchor.fm/a--j-pei-treasures/...

Our Blog Posts are available on
WordPress: https://wordpress.com/sites/aandjpeit... and
GoodReads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show...

Podcast are available on Anchor FM in a variety of formats: https://anchor.fm/a--j-pei-treasures iHeart Radio: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-e-...
Podchaser: https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/e-...
Amazon: https://music.amazon.ca/podcasts/879a...

All my e-books can be found on:
Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/E.-Jean-Simpso...
Smashwords (my Affiliate link): https://www.smashwords.com/profile/vi... or https://www.smashwords.com/profile/vi...

Keep watching for more e-books and more formats! We’re always working on something! Thank you!
E. Jean Simpson

Twitter-pated or Not…

Hi and Welcome to the A & J PEI Treasures E Jean Simpson Author Blog Post and Podcast. I’m your host, Jean coming to you from the beautiful Province of Prince Edward Island, Canada!! The blog post and podcast is an opinion piece and only reflects this author’s opinion and not that of any other entity. Today I talk about a current controversy on social media. The takeover of Twitter! If you want to find out more, then stay tuned…!

Elon Musk officially bought out Twitter https://www.cnbc.com/2022/04/25/twitt... sort of. There have been a wide variety of reactions to the takeover of Twitter by Elon Musk. It seems that the company itself has had several owners, chairmen of the board and there are various shareholders https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twitter. I am not sure what effect the buyout may have if it goes through as he will be owner. Reactions have run the gambit from people leaving Twitter to people celebrating the new “freedom of speech” https://www.theguardian.com/technolog... . While some are sitting back and watching to find out what the ramifications will be. There are some worrisome ideas floating around.

I think the concerns mostly surround how Mr. Musk might interpret ‘freedom of speech’. The one idea of ‘freedom of speech’ that many seem to have is that it is their right to say anything they wish without concern of being censored. However, that is a somewhat narrow view of ‘freedom of speech’. I like the definition of ‘freedom of speech’ that comes in the article on Wiki https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freedom.... “Freedom of speech and expression, therefore, may not be recognized as being absolute, and common limitations or boundaries to freedom of speech…” they continue on to indicate that freedom of speech does not give the right to endanger or harm the freedom of others and does not impede dignity or privacy as well as some other well thought out restrictions. These should not be a burden on the general public, but a guideline toward more respectful use of speech. The article, at least the first few paragraphs, is a useful read for those who aren’t all that sure about ‘freedom of speech’. It is my concern that they decide that ‘freedom of speech’ is a fundamental right to mistreat certain groups based on religion, race, gender, gender identity and human rights of various types. This seems to agree with the concerns of various groups over the world. This would be a move backward, in my humble opinion. I hope that Mr. Musk recognizes that ‘freedom of speech’ is not without boundaries. The fact that he intends to buy out all the shareholders etc., is concerning. Making it a private company also has some concerning aspects.

The other item that seems to be a grave concern is how is Mr. Musk going to ‘confirm identities’ on Twitter. If it is click to make sure you’re not a bot…well, that’s fine. https://www.thecoinrepublic.com/2022/... and https://finance.yahoo.com/news/elon-m... as the articles suggest, however, I have a great deal of concern about giving over any Personal identification online. There is enough hacking and stuff to make me highly uncomfortable with the idea of giving over my ID to a social media conglomerate, or in fact anything online at this point. This might be a deal breaker for me. He doesn’t have to live with the consequences of my life being blown up because someone accesses my personal information. I would be the one living with it. So, that is one of the other big concerns I have seen in the media.

Of course, recent articles suggest that there are still hurdles to this agreement. It rests with shareholders. https://finance.yahoo.com/news/musks-... so apparently, the shareholders can still put an end to the endeavour. So, it’s more hurry up and wait. In the meantime, we continue with the varying level of trepidation to excitation that is going on with the whole deal. The thing I hope is that cooler heads prevail and that the changes do not endanger people based on being ‘different’. That loads of nice people don’t lose their jobs. That people don’t have to worry about whether or not they will have to do shopping for a whole new social media forum.

It is apparently having an effect on Tesla stock. https://ca.news.yahoo.com/tesla-share... so there is also that to consider. I find it very interesting how one thing can make so many changes and upset the whole equilibrium of the social media empire. The method of running Twitter may not be perfect, but perhaps, over time, the boards, shareholders and users could come up with suggestions and work things out. Currently, I can get rid of sites and things I don’t want to see. I’m not that interested in some sorts of posts. We all have our interests and things we don’t like to see. For me, the idea of groups lacking tolerance and lacking compassion for their fellow humans is a terrifying prospect. People talk about the need for world peace, the need to move forward in a positive manner. Yet, we can’t agree on simple things like what does ‘freedom of speech’ mean. How can we expect to live together in harmony if we can’t even get along on a social media platform? There are people who hate people based on the colour of their skin, their religion, their weight, their hair, their gender identity so how are we ever going to reach for world peace. Mr. Musk, with all your billions, can you buy us that? No. Mr. Musk cannot buy that. Twitter cannot sell us that. WE are the ones that have to take control of ourselves and our destiny. If we don’t do it, no one will. If we cannot be honest with each other, then at least be honest with ourselves. If you can’t respect each other, then at least live and let live.

Let us hope that Mr. Musk is a man of his word…because if he is, then these words should come back to him. “I think there should be regulations on social media to the degree that it negatively affects the public good.” (Elon Musk). I think that we need to start seeing social media as something a little different. I think that this definition of what to use social media for is an important one. Malala Yousafzai has said, “What is interesting is the power and the impact of social media… So we must try to use social media in a good way.” That doesn’t seem to be the actual goal of social media all the time.

As Emily Atack says, “Everyone is comparing lives on social media and wants the perfect body, perfect image, perfect outfit, perfect life – we’re striving for this perfection, and it’s so unhealthy because there’s no such thing as perfection.” As far as that is concerned, it is a pitfall of social media. Whether it is Elon Musk or someone else owning a site, we need to understand that no life is perfect. An old story that I remember hearing years ago as a teen was very enlightening. Someone pointed to a Persian rug that was in an exhibit. They said do you notice, there is a small imperfection in the rug. This was done on purpose. The people who made these rugs many years ago understood that if they tried to make it perfect, without flaw, they were flying in the face of God…this is because that is the only entity that is perfect. So, when you see the perfect life, the perfect career or anything that seems perfect, understand that they have trials and tribulations just like everyone else. Whether Elon Musk takes over Twitter or not, we still have to interact, we still have to be on the same planet with other people. If we do not follow our moral compass, if we decide to act with hate and disregard for others, we still fail to reach for the ultimate goal of peace on earth. Remember what you do online and how you speak online sends out ripples. You are being seen by others and sometimes by children. If you use hate speech, if you put down someone for being different, then you are the one responsible for what you are teaching others. Do you want your social media experience to be a good one? Do you want it to be a fake one? Do you want it to be a true one? Do you want it to be an honourable one? At the very least, it should be a kind and fun one.

*Note: At time of writing this, nothing has been officially completely decided.

Thanks for listening to my podcast and/or reading my blog post and thanks for your interest in A & J PEI Treasures!

The podcast that matches this blog post can be found on Anchor FM: https://anchor.fm/a--j-pei-treasures/...

Our Blog Posts are available on
WordPress: https://wordpress.com/sites/aandjpeit... and
GoodReads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show...

Podcast are available on Anchor FM in a variety of formats: https://anchor.fm/a--j-pei-treasures iHeart Radio: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-e-...
Podchaser: https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/e-...
Amazon: https://music.amazon.ca/podcasts/879a...

All my e-books can be found on:
Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/E.-Jean-Simpso...
Smashwords (my Affiliate link): https://www.smashwords.com/profile/vi... or https://www.smashwords.com/profile/vi...

Keep watching for more e-books and more formats! We’re always working on something! Thank you!


E. Jean Simpson

How I find ways to be Productive

Hi and Welcome to the A & J PEI Treasures E Jean Simpson Author Blog Post and Podcast. I’m your host, Jean coming to you from the beautiful Province of Prince Edward Island, Canada!! The blog post and podcast is an opinion piece and only reflects this author’s opinion and not that of any other entity. Today, I will talk a bit about how I stay on track with work and what I find helpful in scheduling. If you want to find out more, then stay tuned…!

I find that being out of work, I need to keep some sort of schedule of my own. If I don’t do this, I tend to be unproductive. Of course, lately, I’ve struggled with my energy levels. People tend to tell you to schedule every minute. For me, this is rather hard to do. There are the issues with my energy which come and go. I also seem to have difficulty with atmospheric pressure which can cause a headache and this month has had weird weather. It was bad enough that it literally took out our little dog pen fence. It was a mix of rain and muddy conditions and a wind that literally shook the house. So, the fact that the weather was up and down like a yoyo didn’t help matters. Still, one can’t stop living just because things aren’t going great.

There are tons of articles out there explaining the importance of scheduling, scheduling life, scheduling projects, etc. One short one, gives 5 reasons. https://automatedtrackers.com/5-reaso.... So, I won’t give the same discussions as are seen elsewhere. I will talk about why scheduling is important to me and how I use it to get my work done. Generally, my reasons seem to follow along with the reasons of many other articles that are out there. I just give you a view of how my mind works with regard to scheduling.

So, how do I stay motivated when I don’t feel like moving? How do I manage to still get stuff done? It’s not always easy. One thing I have to say is that it is not going to destroy anything if you actually decide not to do anything for a day. Lately, I’ve been taking the odd break. However, one of the things I tend to do is have certain days where I try to do certain things. I loosely schedule myself or another way of putting it is I add some structure to my days. People have their regular schedules where they eat and sleep at regular intervals and we know that it is healthy to have certain routine. This is no surprise. So, those life things are somewhat loosely scheduled in the day. I also have a household to maintain. So, generally my loose schedule for writing and other work is that Wed I do my blog post draft. I then get my husband the “A” of A & J PEI Treasures to give it a read over and he highlights anything that doesn’t make sense. Then the next day, I do another edit and fix the stuff he points out. By Friday, I do one last read over and get my blog post and podcast ready to be able to go out on Saturday morning. This is pretty much a schedule I stick to with regard to my blog post and podcast series.

The other thing I fit in between are laundries and other cleaning. Generally laundry is once every few days so I have a full laundry to do. My evenings, I leave for check in’s on Twitter, but mostly for crafts such as my boho sewing projects, colouring, reading and other things. It gives my husband a shot at the computer. Anything I do online at night is usually via tablet. This does result in some typos going out. Auto correct is a wonderful thing…sometimes. Then any house cleaning gets put between other things.

My afternoons, I either do some crafts like sewing or knitting or work on a writing project or photography project. For a lot of the projects, writing and photography are involved. However, when I am working on my writing, I tend to use afternoons for that. Usually early in the week before the Blog draft time. On Saturday, I make sure I get my Monday Montage done. At that time, depending on what else is going on, I may start my week official posts. That’s what I call them. I like to make a week worth of posts and have them scheduled a week in advance. This is done between Saturday and Sunday. Then any other posts, I put up after fill in. I have 3 posts per day every day on Twitter. I do check ins when I can and add when I feel necessary. I learn to do some stuff ahead. To be honest, if I’m sick, I’m not going to be very functional and it’s best I get some stuff done ahead. If you wonder how life is different for someone with a ‘disability’ or medical condition, we plan ahead. Sometimes I have to drag myself through the schedule. Other time, I accomplish a lot. Scheduling loosely works better for me. Giving myself permission not to always get as much accomplished as I would like is also part of the plan.

The one important thing about writing the blog and putting it on a deadline for writing, I don’t always have to write it on Wednesday. I sometimes do it earlier. I try not to do it later. This makes sure that I have actual time in my day/life to do the blog post. Even when I don’t feel like writing a blog post, I still make sure I come in and attempt the draft. If I can’t think of anything, I kind of skim some ideas lists. Something is always bound to appeal to me as an idea. Then I go from there. That was my approach today. Some days, the news just calls out something that sticks in my head and makes me want to write about it. Those are the easy blog posts to do. I have an idea, I have the inspiration, and I just have to get it down on the screen. At one time, one would have to get their article down on paper. Haven’t used that method since University days.

As Annie Dillard said, “A schedule defends from chaos and whim. It is a net for catching days. It is a scaffolding on which a worker can stand and labor with both hands at sections of time.” This is what makes a schedule of sorts important. If you do not have a schedule, the time slips away and nothing is accomplished. Even a loose schedule keeps one from losing track of what one is supposed to be doing. Having projects on the go gives you motivation to continue working on them. It helps you to maintain some control over the time you have in the day. Knowing I have a blog post to do and having it weekly on Saturday means that I know that it has to be done. It has to be released and it also helps people to know that there is a regular schedule. People begin to expect that the Monday Montage will show up about 10AM. The Blog Post and Podcast show up about 10AM – 11AM depending on how well I can manage the links in the WordPress Blog Post. Of course there are some things that might not be in your control. So, having a general time of release is useful. It keeps the writer on track and the followers know what to expect.

I think the most important thing one can do is put their mental and physical health first. Having something to look forward to doing and having a specific time to do it adds an element of predictability to life. It is a comfort to know that you can accomplish something even when you are not at your level best. I enjoy my writing projects, my various artistic endeavours, and my photography. In summer, the photography comes much easier as I bring my camera on all our walks. This makes it easier to schedule time to take pictures. They don’t all come out. But I love seeing nature in bloom and getting pictures ready for my various projects. I’ve always had an active mind. I seldom can sit and do only one thing at a time. I often watch documentaries and such while working on sewing or craft projects. Unfortunately, I do have too many projects in my head to ever do all of them. This does result in a list of things I might not always get to.

As Twyla Tharp has said, “I don't think that scheduling is uncreative. I think that structure is required for creativity.” So, I think that most people accomplish more if they have some sort of schedule. It requires knowing what it is that you need to accomplish and committing to getting it done. This might be the most important aspect of scheduling in some form or another. It is giving yourself notice that it is something that you think is worth doing and making sure you put time toward it. This is also what makes scheduling time for oneself and family important. You recognize what the priorities are in your life and how you want to spend your time. It makes your priorities more real and it gives recognition to the fact that time is precious.

Thanks for listening to my podcast and/or reading my blog post and thanks for your interest in A & J PEI Treasures!

The podcast matching this blog post is on Anchor FM: https://anchor.fm/a--j-pei-treasures/...

Our Blog Posts are available on
WordPress: https://wordpress.com/sites/aandjpeit... and
GoodReads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show...

Podcast are available on Anchor FM in a variety of formats: https://anchor.fm/a--j-pei-treasures iHeart Radio: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-e-...
Podchaser: https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/e-...
Amazon: https://music.amazon.ca/podcasts/879a...

All my e-books can be found on:
Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/E.-Jean-Simpso...
Smashwords (my Affiliate link): https://www.smashwords.com/profile/vi... or https://www.smashwords.com/profile/vi...

Keep watching for more e-books and more formats! We’re always working on something! Thank you!
The Big Kid’s Magical Path to Numbers

Time Changes Everything

Hi and Welcome to the A & J PEI Treasures E Jean Simpson Author Blog Post and Podcast. I’m your host, Jean coming to you from the beautiful Province of Prince Edward Island, Canada!! The blog post and podcast is an opinion piece and only reflects this author’s opinion and not that of any other entity. I have found that time changes everything in a myriad of ways. If you want to find out more, then stay tuned…!

People don’t realize how many changes have come around in the past 50 years. I mean, we point out 100 years with electricity and other such things, but even then, in the past fifty years, things have changed more than most people realize. For example, when I was a kid, I remember when my mother started to warn her parents to start locking their doors. When we started locking our doors. I don’t remember what happened to ensure that we did, but I remember that they were very careful to do so afterward. This seems a simple thing to many people. There are still some areas where they don’t lock their doors. Overall most people now lock their doors. It is a security measure. Actually, my father used to say, you have locks to keep honest people from getting into trouble. Seemed like a strange thing to say, but there is an interesting honesty to that when you understand that houses that are locked are still broken into.

This brings me to another thing that changed. In the old days, after my grandparents died, they would have been quite safe to leave the house there until family could go through it and not worry about anything. It was locked after all. However, much to their disappointment. They got to the house and it had been broken into and desecrated. I won’t go into details. The people destroyed stuff. What was left, at that point, the family took what they wanted. They tried to donate the house itself to a historical society, but they wouldn’t take it. Finally in desperation and not wanting to have the house broken into for parties, they donated it to the fire department. The fire department burned it to the ground as part of a practice. All the family memories went up in smoke with it. The building of their only bathroom (previous to that there was the outhouse). Yes, they used an outhouse until far enough into my childhood that I remember it being installed. I remember visiting with my mother. Both my grandmothers used outhouses and chamber pots. I used chamber pots. These are something pretty much unused today and only found in old homes and museums. You see the National Park outhouses…which are pretty advanced compared to the dig a hole and build a wooden place on it are not like the old outhouses. Then there was also the having to move it when it got … …’Ummm…filled up. Now you just go to the bathroom and pull a lever and voila…gone. My other grandmother’s house got bull dozed. After she became sick and stopped living there, some family lived there off and on, but it went downhill fast. It was becoming a danger and so it was gone.

Of course these are just one person’s examples. There were other things that changed over time that most people don’t consider. One of these is the television. When I was a child and until I was in grade school, we had black and white television sets. I think we had two channels or maybe three. There was no cable. There was no wide variety of channels. There was no Netflix. It hadn’t even been heard of at that time. There was a movie theatre in the nearest town. We would go if there was something we especially wanted to see. There was also the Drive In Theatre. That was the most fun. You could have some control over the sound so it wasn’t blaring in your ears. You watched from the comfort of your car. There were drinks and popcorn. The kids could be dressed in jammies if they were young enough and fall asleep in the back seat. My brother and I were those kids. Now the Drive In seems to be an oddity that people go see for the novelty. Then it was a family event. An evening out for the whole family.

Of course, the computer age was not even thought of when I was a child. I learned to type on a Selectric Typewriter in High School. I was of the electric generation. Before that they learned on manuals. The Selectric that I learned to type on was a big green monster of a machine. When I went to University for my first degree, they were still using cards in computers. I remember at the end of the year, cards flying in the air. I also remember gasps of horror if some unfortunate computer science student had an unfortunate incident with his box of cards. Boxes of cards. It was a specialty all by itself. I hand typed my papers or wrote them by hand. They still accepted hand written papers at that time. By the time I was in College, I was just on the beginning of the new word processor age. Businesses had typewriters. They had faxes. These were not sleek machines, but monstrosities. There was also the lovely Teletype that I learned to use while working in a customs office in Niagara Falls. Now everything is on a computer that takes up no more room than a screen on your desk…or screens depending on how you prefer to do your work. Your tablet and cell phone can connect you to the internet and take up very little room. You can watch television shows on a computer, or on an app or any number of ways. These are all things we never dreamed of. The top of the line computer game at our local Yacht club was a little ball on the screen that you could hit back and forth with paddles and was the size of a whole table. Now they play games that are realistic…maybe too realistic and on little screens.

As a child, the car was something that had a lot of parts, but they were fixable. Backyard mechanics were not all that unusual. The cars now have computer parts. I’m never sure if that is good or bad. I think there is a mix. Things can happen that didn’t seem to with the older cars. We also had one of those little triangle windows that allowed some air in the car if you didn’t want a full open window. You don’t see them in today’s cars. It seems the cars more or less look similar to each other now. When I was a kid, each car had a different style. I was born in the early 60’s. Anyone seeing the cars from the 60’s and 70’s would understand that they were all different. Some of them were literally huge. No one worried about gas…not like today. There were also a lot of larger cars. Now with the cost of gas and eco-friendly concerns, they seem to have reduced the number of actual types of cars on the road and many have a standard look. Of course, when I was a child, there were also some tragic accidents because seat belts were not made mandatory until I think I was in my teens. Now, that was a good change. It has been proven to have saved lives.

I’m not sure exactly what has changed with regard to kids. Kids would play outside. Parents were heard to say children should be seen and not heard. Now, they scream their lungs out in stores and no one does anything about it. Some also leave kids in the car unattended. I remember when one parent would be in doing something, if we needed to be out in the car, there was always an adult left out in the car with us. I’m not sure what changed there. There seems to be some disconnect from what we learned and were taught as kids and what is going on with families now. Granted, my mother was a teacher. Maybe we had to learn more manners. Though we did get up to the odd thing, it was never very harmful stuff. As my mother said, she learned as a mother not to be embarrassed by what other people did…which I suppose suggests that my memories may be a little less than perfect about our manners. However, I do remember, while in school, the teacher coming in and giving us a lecture. It summed up to when there were older people on the sidewalk, we were to make sure that we moved aside and let them pass without bothering them. Apparently someone had called the school and complained. I remember some friends and I were out walking and seeing someone older and we moved aside and let them pass. Now, if something like that happened, they likely would have parents up in arms about how they lectured their kid and their kid had every right to be on the street. Remember parents, you were kids too at one time. Let the elderly walk unimpeded. You’re going to be one of them some day!

Thanks for listening to my podcast and/or reading my blog post and thanks for your interest in A & J PEI Treasures!

The podcast corresponding to this blog post is on anchor FM: https://aandjpeitreasures.wordpress.c...

Our Blog Posts are available on
WordPress: https://wordpress.com/sites/aandjpeit... and
GoodReads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show...

Podcast are available on Anchor FM in a variety of formats: https://anchor.fm/a--j-pei-treasures iHeart Radio: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-e-...
Podchaser: https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/e-...
Amazon: https://music.amazon.ca/podcasts/879a...

All my e-books can be found on:
Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/E.-Jean-Simpso...
Smashwords (my Affiliate link): https://www.smashwords.com/profile/vi... or https://www.smashwords.com/profile/vi...

Keep watching for more e-books and more formats! We’re always working on something! Thank you!


E. Jean Simpson

Life from the Invisible Lane

The Big Kid's Magical Path to Insects in Nature

Hi and Welcome to the A & J PEI Treasures E Jean Simpson Author Blog Post and Podcast. I’m your host, Jean coming to you from the beautiful Province of Prince Edward Island, Canada!! The blog post and podcast is an opinion piece and only reflects this author’s opinion and not that of any other entity. The past few days I have had the energy of a slug. I think today is as good of a day as any to discuss life with an invisible condition. If you want to find out more, then stay tuned…!

I’m one of those many people out there that you can’t see what is wrong. It’s called an invisible disability. I have more than one. However, there is one that almost ended my life; Crohn’s disease. The list in the article that gives a list of invisible disabilities and contains some information on it as well as other invisible disabilities. https://www.umass.edu/studentlife/sit.... I also had childhood asthma which means weaker lungs and I still have some allergies. Now, Crohn’s is also one of those ‘embarrassing’ ones so you don’t hear much except the old commercial for the Crohn’s and Colitis foundation which are pretty non-specific like only people who have it would wonder. It involves the digestive system, and can take place between the mouth and the rectum…mine was from entry to exit or stem to stern as I put it in nautical terms as it sounds less disgusting to others. I didn’t get diagnosed until I was a bit older. At the time, I was very sick and was admitted to hospital. At first we had thought it was a flu. I am prone to getting sick easily and tend to stay sick longer. https://www.disabled-world.com/health... gives you a run-down of the disease. What people don’t understand about this type of disability is that when you have a flare, you feel so tired and so unmotivated. I luckily have some things I can do while that is going on, but often in the work world, you still have to continue to work. I like to hand sew, and colour when too fatigued to do other things. It does make it very hard to focus to write stuff. I become listless. I become cranky.

I’m one of the ones who might be considered lucky with regard to the disability. I tend to have been able to mostly control it with diet. I’m not sure if that will stay life long, but it is working for now. Though sometimes, when things are not going well for a few days, I am forced to start with liquid diets, fruit juices, ginger ale, broths, etc. in order to give my digestive system a break to get back on track. Most of the time I eat regularly what I term a semi-healthy diet with fruits, veggies, meats, poultry and such. But, a flare just literally sucks the energy out of me. I still maintain the exercise and walk, but it’s like dragging oneself through mud.

How long have I had this? The actual fact is that I likely had it since childhood…looking back I did have some difficulties in childhood. However, sometimes it is the big attack that gets you diagnosed. So, I managed to escape the big attack until I was older. This is not necessarily better or worse. I get joint pain and fatigue and run fevers when I am having an attack. It makes it hard to plan things. I’ve been mostly lucky and tend not to have a great many attacks. Each one is frustrating as I’m less active than I usually like to be, more tired and less patient. I still have to get stuff done. Life doesn’t stop just because you have a medical condition. Just my life gets messed up…well, that and the lives of those around me when I’m not very functional. I think one thing that it has done is made me more determined and I tend to work through the burn to put to use a saying I’ve heard. Of course, that only takes you so far.

As Mary Ann Mobley is credited with saying, “At the time I was diagnosed with Crohn's disease, my doctors told me that I had an incurable illness and they didn't know much about it.” According to some sources, she was diagnosed in 1962. A year before I was born. There is more known about it now, though it is still incurable. Where Colitis can be treated with medication, I was told that Crohn’s tends to be less successful in such treatments…which is when I decided to try to deal with it through diet. I do have some medication, but it is only as needed basis. For those who know little about Crohn’s, it is not one of those everyday discussions because it deals with the colon and the elimination tract. It can be painful. In flares, my stomach swells, I get feeling of heart burn. Fatigue, joint pain. I’m not sure if the fever makes me tired or I’m tired because I have a fever. Doesn’t matter, it’s there either way.

Further things about Crohn’s you don’t see in the mainstream is the fact that often your body does not digest food properly. General Practitioner Doctors tell you that if you eat healthy, you don’t need vitamins, however, the problem lies in the digestion of the food I eat. No matter how healthy I eat, I tend to be low on vitamins. I also tend to get low on iron. So, as part of my stuff, I need to take vitamins. My specialist told me which ones. I stick with that. There are some over the counter things my specialist forbade. For example, aspirin and derivatives are off the list, Tylenol was the only one he would suggest and got upset when another doctor told me to try something else. The specialist was over the moon when I told him I didn’t drink alcohol. You see, blood thinners are not a great thing to do a lot of if you have this condition and could complicate things. You are also told that popcorn is not a good idea? Why you say, it’s only popcorn. Popcorn has this sharp little things from popping kernels and with an unhealthy colon…not the best plan. I do miss popcorn. I can have it if I rip off just the white stuff, but that gets old fast.

When I was diagnosed, I had it from throat to rectum…yes too much information, but it does give you a sense of just how difficult it can be. It is a problem that can affect any area between the two. It’s a serious case in that sense. However, the one thing that didn’t seem to be affected was my ileum. Why you say, does that matter? Well, for one thing, I can manage seeds…this is something a lot of people with Crohn’s with the ileum affected cannot manage. https://www.britannica.com/science/ileum. The link gives some information about the importance of this part of the digestive tract. When that is affected, seeds and things like that can cause a huge issue. So, this means I can tolerate seeds on tomatoes, strawberries and such without being in a lot of pain. I have heard of some people who literally cannot have strawberry seeds because their ileum is affected. It is a multifaceted illness that can affect one’s life, work and outlook.

Treatment for my first big flare consisted of Prednisone which is a steroid. For those who have had to use it as a treatment, you know that you can have mood swings, moon face and other symptoms from it. But it will save your life if you are that ill. Options are at a minimum. I have managed to keep it mostly under control enough not to need this treatment since. I was easily annoyed, felt like a blimp. But, be happy, at least you’re still alive. The other symptoms going with this life saving treatment can be restlessness and high energy and the appetite of two or three people. It takes a while for the effects of that to wear off. Then there is the regular endoscopies and colonoscopies to ensure bowel health. I won’t go into detail about these. There is unpleasant preparation. If you’re interested in details. https://www.gastroconsa.com/endoscopy... gives a brief description.

Robert M. Hensel has said, "There is no greater disability in society than the inability to see a person as more.” I think this is, in part, why I seldom speak about my medical conditions except to say that I am having a hard time with it. I think that this makes it a good time to talk about it. I have had it so long that I really don’t give it a big part of my life or at least any more than I have to. It does affect what I do and how I do it sometimes, but for the most part, I manage to continue on with life more or less as normal. Now I do tend to take some time to rest more than in the past. I’m not going to ever be one of your people that involved in lots of after work activities. I still have to get stuff done, I still have to do laundry or house work. I do a little less of it. I still take walks with my husband and Sam our dog. I just find now that I take it easier at night when I’m in flare up. I sew or do quiet work. I don’t get to my writing as much when I am sick. For me, it is part of my life. It is part of my life that I do not discuss widely and maybe that is how many people feel as there isn’t a rush of people writing on it from their own viewpoint. It is a hereditary disease and there is a possibility of family members being affected. People talk about shameful past things and shame about our bodies. This is a current thing and people still view it with shame or disgust because it’s the ‘crappy’ part of the body…haven’t decided if pun is intended or not.

I agree with Helen Keller who said, "A bend in the road is not the end of the road. Unless you fail to make the turn." Sometimes things happen in life. When I had my first big attack, I had just paid off my education, had just paid off my Charter as a Psychologist in Alberta. Then I had the big attack. I knew with the fallout from that, I would never be able to go back to counselling. Something was different. There was some damage from the blood getting so low. I didn’t function the way I used to or feel the way I used to. This might have been, in part, due to the Prednisone. So, I went through a whole change in career and mindset. My world had changed. It was my first big illness, but not my last. The one thing that came out of that was that I learned that you aren’t always going to be able to go back to what you did. Your body might not let you take the stress or punishment it took when you were 20 or 30 or even 40. You have to roll with the punches and do what you can do. Life isn’t always a bowl full of cherries and you have to find a way to move on positively.

Thanks for listening to my podcast and/or reading my blog post and thanks for your interest in A & J PEI Treasures!

The podcast corresponding to this blog post is available on Anchor FM: https://anchor.fm/a--j-pei-treasures/...

Our Blog Posts are available on
WordPress: https://wordpress.com/sites/aandjpeit... and
GoodReads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show...

Podcast are available on Anchor FM in a variety of formats: https://anchor.fm/a--j-pei-treasures iHeart Radio: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-e-...
Podchaser: https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/e-...
Amazon: https://music.amazon.ca/podcasts/879a...

All my e-books can be found on:
Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/E.-Jean-Simpso...
Smashwords (my Affiliate link): https://www.smashwords.com/profile/vi... or https://www.smashwords.com/profile/vi...

Keep watching for more e-books and more formats! We’re always working on something! Thank you!
E. Jean Simpson

It was Just a Joke…

Hi and Welcome to the A & J PEI Treasures E Jean Simpson Author Blog Post and Podcast. I’m your host, Jean coming to you from the beautiful Province of Prince Edward Island, Canada!! The blog post and podcast is an opinion piece and only reflects this author’s opinion and not that of any other entity. Today I find myself with little to discuss except that what makes news isn’t always news and sometimes we miss part of the issue for the more dramatic as they say, miss the forest for the trees. If you want to find out more, then stay tuned…!

I find myself avoiding the news these days. It is full of some fight between actors and others who should be actors because they really don’t need the press they are given. For instance, on a daily basis we hear about violence against others. People beating, shooting and killing each other. The amount of press time given to the incident between Chris Rock and Will Smith at the Oscars seems to be incredible. Then we ask why it is given such interest? Perhaps it is a symptom of the world unrest. For anyone who would not know and would have to be living under a rock to not know about this, actor Will Smith came up and slapped Chris Rock across the face during the filming of the Oscars for making comments about Will’s wife, Jada Pinkett Smith. For those who might not know, she suffers from alopecia which results in hair loss. Has anyone watched the footage? I decided to because this didn’t seem quite real. It honestly felt contrived in watching it, however, it apparently was not. The thing that I noticed most and I’m not sure if anyone else did…do you know what it was? It was the look on Jada Pinkett Smith’s face that came after the joke. I don’t in any way condone what Will Smith did. It was wrong. It was patriarchal and a foolish move. Perhaps he had one too many drinks and I’ve also heard rumours that Chris Rock has targeted his wife more than once. But, while everyone was focused on the two people who seem involved in this, Jada Pinkett Smith was left out of it entirely. Later on they point out that she laughed…I’m not sure I’d know how to react to the whole situation. She made one statement since that I am aware of. This is where I get the idea that sometimes the news isn’t the actual news. It is like they miss the point. Will Smith should never in a hundred years have done what he did. But, it seems that Chris Rock is getting sellout crowds to his next show. He refused to press charges. Everyone is taking sides. In the midst of all this, is the woman who suffers from a medical condition and is, at the first, left out entirely. Perhaps she is the wise one in all of this.

According to Sanam Saeed, “We need to start identifying the triggers that aggravate mental health issues in our society - bullying, social media negativity and anxiety, gender based violence, substance abuse, stigma around issues such as maternal issues, etc., and we need to speak up about these more and get to the source of the problems.” I couldn’t agree more with this evaluation. We see the violence, but make the actual battle that Jada Pinkett Smith has been fighting just part of a joke on the Oscars. I’ve read varying reports that Chris Rock was not aware of her battle with alopecia. But I also read that she has made it public in the past months. Again, I don’t condone in any way what Will Smith did, but was Chris Rock also perpetuating bullying by bringing it to the attention of everyone that she has a shaved head. This was in the middle of the Oscars. Of course, at the same time, we need to understand that the Oscars have been host to a number of shocking things. In 1974, there was a streaker (someone who runs nude…not really Oscar fare) at the Oscars… https://www.vogue.com/article/most-sh... and of course Marlon Brando declined the Oscar for the treatment of Native Americans in the film industry and “he offered up his place at the podium to Native American civil rights activist Sacheen Littlefeather”. None of these involved violence, but for better or worse, it is not the only controversy to darken the Oscars. Of these, Marlon Brando should have had the most respect for his actions. It was done to make sure that the plight of the Native American in the film industry was not right.

As Martin Luther King, Jr. stated, “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.” I honestly haven’t stated an opinion of Will Smith’s behavior because it is inherently a wrong thing to do. He has said much more about himself than Chris Rock (I honestly find his joke offensive given the situation). I don’t know the whole story and it is unlikely that the general public will get the whole story. I think that it could have been handled a lot differently. At the same time, the look on Jada Pinkette Smith’s face left me wondering if she didn’t feel as though she had been slapped in the face. Here is where we get into the two wrongs don’t make a right part of the talk. Where we say because he hurt Jada’s feelings, doesn’t give Will Smith the right to smack Chris Rock in the face. We’ve seen so much against bullying and against violence and yet we saw both things happening in moment by moment action on the Oscar night show. A show meant to celebrate the industry. It’s just humour after all....

This quote is one that I would like to share from Eileen Cook, “I'm joking," She said to the group. Ah, the joking defense. The tried and true excuse for bullies everywhere.” You see, there can be as much damage done with an ill-conceived joke against a person who is battling a medical condition of any sort or even a mental health condition. Would Chris Rock have gotten laughs if Jada had lost her hair battling cancer? It can do as much harm as a slap in the face to the person who bravely shows up and does all they can. I think the true nature of the whole situation is far sadder and far more complicated than just someone slapping someone on stage. This is a sad situation of multiple inappropriate things all in one stage. It’s just a joke…sometimes it is used as a defense. I can’t imagine being the poor woman sitting there, struggling with alopecia and trying to be classy and beautiful (which she is, though I also understand she has her own issues according to rumours) and having someone point out that she has her head shaved. The thing that most women are used to having people admire…their beautiful hair or whatever attribute that gets lost to illness or accident and having someone on stage point it out and make a joke of it. Was it ill-conceived or purposefully done? When it is done in a crowd around someone with a disability or medical condition, is it looked at similarly? How would you feel if you were the woman being pointed out at the Oscars in this way?

Honestly, I’m not that impressed by Will Smith or Chris Rock in all of this. Neither one was all that appropriate in my opinion. It is thoughtless and it is more the woman who was hurt in all this mess that I feel for. Sometimes I find the world a strange place. We see the client as the people in the fight. Sometimes it is the person they were very careful not to show. While Will Smith is yelling an obscenity at Chris Rock, I did not see the feed on Jada. How humiliating to be put in the center of that male ego fest when you are battling your own issues. How unfair that she should be forced to be centre of a joke when she suffers a medical condition. If she has very little to say and it is mostly cryptic, well, I can’t blame her. I extend my sympathies that she was put through such a cold and heartless night when she was there to celebrate. Maybe people need to think more about the situations that people are facing in daily life before they decide to put up ‘just a joke’. Medical conditions, mental health conditions, none of these are funny…at least we report that they aren’t and they get less funny to the person who has to live it. Yet, the whole thing at the Oscars was mishandled by two people who should be respectable. What have we taught our younger generation? How can we say don’t bully? Don’t beat up people. Respect each other. It may have been a chance for a teachable moment. It could have been a chance for Jada to say something about her condition and how there are people in the world that suffer this condition and it isn’t something that is ‘just a joke’. If it was done at the after party, likely it would have been picked up on all news media and her classiness would have been a short lived topic (good stuff seldom stays in the news long). At least it isn’t ‘just a joke’ when you have to live with it every day. Did Will Smith see his wife’s face and lost it knowing what she is going through? Did he have too much to drink? Did they need that drama? Who knows, but most of the questions can likely be answered by a quick probably not or possibly. They could have made a statement at the after party and encourage others to move forward in their lives with alopecia and to respect each other. A plea for research into the condition. Another missed opportunity….Thanks for listening to my podcast and/or reading my blog post and thanks for your interest in A & J PEI Treasures!

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