Alicen Scott's Blog, page 2

Disability Language in Writing

One of the things that has gotten a lot of disability advocates angry over the last several years is the way disabled people are portrayed in the media. Be it on tv, in movies, and in writing.

Last year, I read a book series I really began to love. I won’t name it, but it’s the only thing I’ve ever written a review for on Goodreads. I read all of the books (there were 6 or 7) until I got to the last one when the disabled character was revealed to be the villain and his reasoning was because he was disabled. After reading that many books in the series, I didn’t finish it and haven’t read anything from that author since.

I was livid. This book had good reviews and people seemed to accept the reasoning behind why he did what he did. All I saw was a lack of creativity on the part of the author and a hell of a lot of ableism.

Why is being disabled considered an excuse to be evil? Imagine if I used my C-PTSD as an excuse to go out and kill everyone that’s ever abused me. I’m not talking about someone who kills their abuser in the moment out of fear or anger, I’m talking about someone who shrugs and says they were mean to me because I’m different like it’s no big deal and it excuses what they’ve done. It doesn’t.

That’s not okay.

The next thing I’m going to talk about is the language used when people talk about disabled people. A lot of disabled people really do not like it when abled people write stories with disabled characters. There are a lot of reasons for this and I have to admit I’m one of those people. Mainly it’s because if you’re abled, you cannot portray a disabled person correctly. You just can’t. I’ve seen many, many writers try and you just can’t. There are a million different things that only disabled people go through you will never understand. I could explain it to you all day long and you still wouldn’t get it. Stick with things you do understand, please. Also, when an abled writes about a disabled character they’re usually touted as an expert on disability by other ableds from that point on and you’re not an expert on something you’ve never lived. By doing this you’re taking away the voices of the actually disabled community. We’ve had to fight so hard (and are still fighting so hard) to have our voices heard, even if you mean well, just don’t. You’re talking over our experiences on something you don’t understand, while being praised by other people who don’t understand, so when we try to disagree with you we’re told we’re wrong because you said something different than we did even though we were talking about our actual experiences and you were talking about the experiences you made up in your head.

STOP.

Oh yeah, and your character who’s entire personality is ‘disabled’ who suddenly overcomes something and is the hero in the end, isn’t original nor is that okay either. Disability is not a plot device. Try harder.

Don’t even get me started on movies and books like Me Before You. Abled actors should not be playing disabled characters. Period. And when they win awards for doing so? Yeah, that’s just plain insulting. In the words of Maysoon Zayid, “If a wheelchair user can’t play Beyonce, then Beyonce shouldn’t be able to play a wheelchair user.” Maysoon did a TED talk I highly recommend all ableds watch. It’s on YouTube.

Your character who’s ‘inspirational’ for ‘overcoming’ his disability and living a ‘normal’ life? That’s inspiration porn and again NOT OKAY. Why? Because disabled people don’t need to be fixed and we’re not inspirational for doing ‘normal’ things. Stella Young did an entire TED talk about this. It’s on YouTube and I highly recommend all ableds watch it.

Another reason is, abled people tend to use terms about disabled people that are quite offensive and when we ask them to correct them, they won’t.

Some of these are:

handicapped

handicapable

wheelchair-bound

ANY version of tard that doesn’t start with mus is NOT OKAY under any circumstances.

Cripple/d (crip has been claimed by a lot of disabled people to take back their power, but it is still not okay for an abled to use)

Diffable, diffability, differently-abled, etc.

Autistic is not a way to generalize mentally disabled people. It is not a slur nor it is a bad thing or an insult. Using it in any of these ways makes you an asshole.

OCD is also not a way to describe yourself if you do not actually HAVE OCD. It’s not something to make jokes about either.

Same for PTSD. PTSD is a very serious mental health condition, and trust me you don’t want it.

When you tell us to calm down, that we’re being oversensitive etc you’re talking over us and not listening to us. This has been a theme throughout my life and throughout the lives of several disabled people I know. I’ve been criticized for being angry by ableds more times than I can count. Yeah, I am angry, because I’m 35 years old and you’re still not listening. I’ve been dealing with this crap for my entire life, wouldn’t you be angry in my shoes? Stop. Just stop.

The general consensus among disabled people is to use the term DISABLED when talking about us. Yes, there are some people who do not identify this way and if someone asks you to identify them differently please respect them, but the majority do identify this way and telling them to calm down makes you an asshole.

A few more things:

Disabled is not a bad word. It literally means unable to do something.

Abled is not a slur.

Identity first language is acceptable.

Person first language was created by ableds to remind them that disabled people are in fact people, take that however you will.

And the last thing I’ll say is for fuck’s sake stop telling us to not be angry about this. Telling us to be nicer to you when all you’ve done is degrade us doesn’t make you look good.

Disabled people are tired, so tired, of repeating all of this over and over and over again to people who really don’t care. But we do it hoping one day someone will listen.

Signed,

A disabled woman who’s been a wheelchair user since she was five and is so tired of dealing with ableism.

Book 2 Has A Title!

The first six chapters of book 2 are completed now and I think it’s time to let you all in on the title.

It’s called The Showdown and oh my god is it different than The Beginning. This book is so much darker, the Aria of The Beginning is nowhere to be found in this book. No more is the sweet little skeptic girl we all started this journey with. She’s a badass now. I won’t spoil anything, but holy crap y’all are gonna have to trust me through this book.

It’s going to be a wild ride. I hope you’re ready.

 

Alicen

Balance (A Book Update)

I’m 14k words deep into writing book 2 now, the process is so different than writing The Beginning was.

When I wrote The Beginning I just wrote and wrote and wrote. There wasn’t anything else I had to focus on so I was able to finish it in about three months.

I’m working on promoting The Beginning while listening to and approving my audiobook and writing book 2. At least I have book 2 plotted out, I just have to write it. I keep trying to push myself harder, very aware I can’t keep up with a lot of my abled peers energy-wise and my partner and my friends keep having to remind me to stop and take care of myself. I’m a spoonie and that does affect me even when I don’t want it to.

Unfamiliar with what a spoonie is? You can read more here.

It’s taken me a few weeks to get a rhythm down and find my balance, but I think I’ve got it now and that definitely makes things easier.

Book 2 is coming together slower than The Beginning did, but it’s coming together. I’m aiming for a July/August release date right now, but we’ll see. The slowness of it has been frustrating for me. I’m not a very patient person, even with myself, and sometimes I have to stop and remind myself why it’s taken me longer this time. I have a LOT of other things going on right now. Still, I want to get this book out asap because I know I left a lot of you hanging with that cliffhanger. (Sorry, not sorry!)

Sales for The Beginning have been better than I anticipated. My goal was to sell five books in my first year, knowing this is my first book and nobody really knows who I am. I surpassed that just in preorders. Since then, things have been pretty steady and I’m grateful. Thank you to everyone who’s bought a copy already. If you haven’t you can do so here. If you have Kindle Unlimited you can read The Beginning for free.

My audiobook is over halfway completed now. It should be finished by the end of the month. I’ll make an announcement here and on my social media when it’s available! I’m so excited for y’all to hear it. My narrator has done an amazing job bringing the story to life. Cassie really has made the perfect Aria, and her portrayal of Tyler is amazing too. She’s dedicated herself to bringing each one of them to life and showing their unique personalities and perspectives. She’s done a fantastic job and I am SO proud of her and SO happy I found her and that she’s agreed to do all of the books in this series.

More later.

I need coffee.

Alicen

I’m Doing A Book Blog Tour!

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It’s being hosted by Silver Dagger Book Tours 5/13-6/13

There will be guest posts, Q&A, a giveaway, and a lot more so be sure to check it out.  I’ll be dropping by the blogs who host me periodically to check on things too so you might catch me there. If you’re a blog that wants to sign up you can do so here.

Ways In Which We Relate to Our Characters

My last post likely ruffled a lot of feathers and I have to admit that was the point.

I’ve spent my entire life stuck in the middle between the ableds and the disableds; never abled enough for the ableds and never disabled enough for the disableds.

When I started working on my book, the divide became more apparent. The questions started. How would I manage my disabilities in my promotion? How honest would I be? Would I risk alienating people with my “extreme” views on disability? Would I keep my mouth shut one more time? How would I be an author without becoming the disabled author?

I made the decision a long time ago to not hide my truth anymore. Blog posts like my previous one make people uncomfortable and I know that when I write them. Often times that’s why I write them. It’s not to be a bitch or anything like that but it is to point out the injustice that a lot of disabled people are afraid to speak out about. If that’s at the expense of selling fewer books then so be it. I refuse to sit down and shut up in the platform I’m creating.

When I wrote Aria and Tyler, I was very aware I was creating two characters who were caught between two worlds, the same way I am. It helped me relate to them in ways I couldn’t have related to characters who weren’t stuck that way. It’s brought a depth to them I couldn’t have otherwise empathized with.

I decided to write abled characters in this book instead of disabled characters not only because I knew they would be more relatable to the general public, but also because I had to be honest to the characters that were calling to me. I didn’t want to create disabled characters for the sake of creating disabled characters. To me, that would be no different than having the ‘token’ disabled character on a TV show or movie. Make no mistake, the disabled characters are coming and they will be true to themselves and relatable to me (and hopefully you) just as much as Aria and Tyler are.

The Beginning is out in the world on kindle and in regular and large print and I’m working on Book 2 now. It’s coming together a lot slower than The Beginning did because I’m also working on promoting The Beginning while I write. My audiobook is about halfway done now and I am so excited for that to be released so you can hear the amazing things my narrator is doing with the world I’ve created.

We’re All In This Together, Right?

I keep seeing people say, “we’re all in this together,” any time COVID-19 is brought up.

But, that’s a lie.

Why?

Because while you’re chanting, “we’re all in this together,” people like me are being left to die because there aren’t enough hospital beds and ventilators, hospitals are having to decide who lives and who dies solely based on prior health issues. Hospitals are enacting DNR policies for anyone who comes in with prior medical needs, even if they’re not relevant to COVID-19. Nurses and doctors don’t have the equipment to protect themselves, let alone their patients.

Because while you’re out there taking way more toilet paper and cleaning supplies than you could possibly need right now, people like me can’t get the supplies we actually DO need because they aren’t available.

Because while we’ve been asking politely for months that you stay home to stop the spread of this, you continued to say it was no big deal and kept going out and doing things that really could have waited. And it’s your inability to stay home that’s literally killing people like me. If there were fewer cases of this virus, these decisions wouldn’t have to be made. We tried, I tried, so many times to make you realize even if you could survive this, I couldn’t and you acted as if I was overreacting.

Because for decades people like me have been asking for basic accommodations for jobs, healthcare, housing and safety and we were denied, told it wasn’t possible or was too expensive and yet now when you need it not only is it suddenly possible it’s happening everywhere and it’s free. It was possible before, you just didn’t want to do it for us.

Because while you were totally comfortable screaming at us about why plastics and straws were bad, now you’re leaving gloves EVERYWHERE like it’s no big deal.

Because ultimately, you only give a damn when it affects you.

So no, we’re NOT “all in this together” when you’re willing to let some of us die just so you don’t have to deal with us.

Damn right I’m angry, somebody should be.

Today Unexpectedly Became a Big Day…

Today started as just my 35th birthday but ended on a very different page.

My paperback books went live today.

You can buy the regular paperback here and the large print version here.

The Kindle version will be published Monday, you can preorder it here.

The audiobook version is currently being recorded and I will update when I have more information on it.

The Mythical Universe: The Beginning Cover Reveal

I am so excited the cover for my first book, The Mythical Universe: The Beginning, is here!!!!!

[image error]I hope y’all like it!

It was designed by my amazing friend Amanda Crawford Brown with just a few words from me. Check her out if you are unfamiliar with her work.

I wanted to start the presale today with the release of the cover, but Amazon is running behind on their approvals for new books so it’s going to have to wait a few days. I will make an announcement when the presale is live hopefully soon.

The Beginning will be available in KU, Kindle, paperback and audiobook formats within the next few weeks!

I can’t believe it’s finally here. I’ve worked so hard on this book and now it’s almost in your hands.

More info as soon as I have it.

Alicen

It’s Been A Little While

I’ve been working hard for the last few months on my book. Now it’s finished and almost ready to be released.

You may have noticed a lot of design changes on my website. I’ve been slowly changing things when I have time.

There’s now an about page, four excerpts and the blurb for my book in the menu at the top of the page. Over the next few days, I’m going to add a page for reviews.

The amount of positive reviews has been overwhelming so I’ve decided to share them here as well as on my social media pages. I’m still doing this with no budget, but the positivity and love I have been surrounded with during this process has helped me tremendously. I’m aiming for an early-to-mid April release right now. It will depend on when my covers are ready and how quickly I can finalize the formatting and get everything uploaded with enough time to have at least a week of presale.

The elephant in the room is COVID-19 and I have to admit I’m terrified. I’ve had bronchitis four times in the last year, each one more severe than the last, and I know my lungs cannot handle this virus. My partner and I are self-isolating as much as possible, going as far as to cancel all nonessential doctor appointments and only talking to friends on the phone or in text. We have everything we need for now, but I wonder just how long all of this is going to last and if we’ll be okay until it’s over. All we can do is take it one day at a time. We are both severely immunocompromised and we know if we catch this we won’t be the lucky ones who survive it, so all we can do is avoid it as much as possible and hope it passes without coming into contact with us. Right now that’s not looking good, it’s been diagnosed in the county we live in more than once.

I’m worried not only for us but for our friends who are also immunocompromised. We are very aware some of us might not make it out of this and the thought is terrifying. Living in awareness but not letting the fear take over is a fine line to walk, but we’re doing our best. That’s all we can do right now.

If you’re immunocompromised please keep yourself safe and if you’re not please be aware of how many of your friends and family likely are. We need to keep each other safe right now. Things aren’t only about you, but those around you.

I’ve seen posts telling people to wear latex gloves in public to keep themselves safe and let me say DO NOT DO THAT! If you wear latex gloves in public you are doubling the chance that a lot of immunocompromised people will die. Latex allergies are real, they are severe and just having latex gloves in an open area where we might be can kill us. If you must wear gloves please choose a latex-free variant. There are plenty to choose from. Latex can stay in the air for hours after you leave, exposing everyone who has to go there. It takes something like 1/1000th the amount of latex in the air to kill someone as it would peanuts. Knowing people are doing this makes me even more fearful of going out because it’s not just getting to close to a person I have to avoid, but breathing and touching surfaces as well. Don’t be an asshole.

Brave

Since I started working on my book a lot of people have called me a lot of things: badass, foolish, ridiculous, strong, determined and much more.

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I decided early on to be completely honest with all of my followers during this process. I’m doing this with no budget at all. Not even a dollar. There is no money for an editor, no money for a cover designer and no money for advertising. Everything, every single detail of all of this, is being done by me and a few very loving friends who are beta reading everything I write. Which is funny because my Instagram is full of people advertising editors, cover designers etc and I cannot afford any of it. A few days ago someone emailed me from my Instagram advertising their services and I couldn’t do anything but laugh. I live on 783 dollars a month before bills, after bills I have about 200 dollars left over. I cannot afford your “cheap” $300 editing or cover design services. That’s not “cheap,” that’s privilege. Do I think people shouldn’t be paid for their work? No, I think everyone should have access to enough income to live a decent life and people shouldn’t be punished for trying to rise up from poverty.  Do I think I should get these services for free? No. I think someone shouldn’t advertise things as cheap when they’re not and people shouldn’t dismiss someone’s hard work just because they can’t fit into some kind of mold of what is acceptable. Unfortunately in our society that’s not what happens. But calling something “cheap” when it’s half of what a lot of people have to live on in an entire month isn’t cheap and you’re privileged if you can drop that much money easily.

I’ve been lucky enough to have a friend who is going to help me with photography and another artist friend who’s helping me design my covers.

I’m doing this without money because you shouldn’t have to have a ton of money to make money. Sure, I could crowdfund and probably raise enough to hire an editor, but then I’d risk losing my disability and even several professionally edited and published books I’ve read are full of typos and grammatical errors. Why would I want to pay someone to leave my book still flawed? Is losing my income worth having an editor’s name listed in my book? No, it’s not. I would rather save that money and put out a book I know I worked on to the best of MY ability. If it’s not perfect who cares, most books aren’t perfect anyway. At the end of the day it’s my name that’s on the cover and I want to be proud of the material I put out.

This is a situation where I had to decide if I wanted to write more than I feared the judgement of everyone who will undoubtedly tell me all the different ways I’m doing this wrong and point out every thing that’s wrong with anything I do. Honestly I’ve had way worse than that in my life, so bring it on.

I shouldn’t be held back from my dreams and goals just because I am disabled and poor. I know though this process I will have to work ten times harder than an abled person going for the same thing I am. Just the writing process is going to take me longer because having Chiari I get brain fatigued really quickly and have to take breaks. Yesterday I wrote 2,000 words over about a twelve hour period. That’s me on a good day, on a bad day I can’t write at all.

The NA paranormal author scene is competitive, but I’m ready and I will not release Aria Book One: The Beginning, until I feel it is ready to be loved by those who will support me regardless of my path, disabilities or bank account.

I am so excited to share my book with all of you this year. I’m over halfway done writing it and have already mapped out the plot lines of books 2 & 3. As well as gotten a main idea for book 4, although I don’t have the plot mapped yet. As you can see, this is going to be a long series of books, more on that at a later date.

The one thing a lot of my friends have called me throughout this process is brave, because regardless of everything holding me back I will not stop until I claw my way from the bottom to the top, and that my friends is the best compliment anyone could give me.

Alicen