Sandra Tayler's Blog, page 112

Lists and Staging

This is the week when WorldCon preparations swamps everything else in my life. You'd think that would be next week when I am actually at WorldCon, except that I've arranged for everything else to be managed next week. Next week I can give WorldCon 100% attention. This week the preparations are all mixed up with feeding kids, house chores, shipping packages, customer support, and community events. At the moment it feels like I'm not doing any of these things particularly well. We've also reached the stage where it is too late. We wanted to create better banners as backdrops for the booth, but there isn't time to get them made and shipped. We're going to have to pay more for fliers and business cards because we have to print them locally instead of at the discount place online. I have half a dozen other clothing and sewing ideas, but have neither time nor clothing budget to execute on them.

My major focus for the next week is thinking ahead. I have to make sure that nothing critical is forgotten. I have to anticipate what we'll need without ever having seen the space in which we will be setting up shop. I have a packing list for the booth, a packing list for me, a packing list for Howard, and I still need to make a packing list for the kids. I also have price lists, inventory lists, and schedules of events. It is all coming together and yet I'm fighting back a persistent feeling that it is all falling apart. To combat this feeling I've started piling things up in the front room.

Our front room is often used as a staging area. This time as I accumulate pieces I am stacking them where I can see them. Once I put them in the pile, I can stop trying to hold them in memory. Also I can start gauging how much stuff we have to haul and whether it will all fit into the two vehicles we'll be driving to Reno. Our neighbors will loan us a car top carrier, which will help, but it will still be tight. My internal volume estimator says it will all fit, but actually seeing the stuff stacked up will help me know that for sure. I'm taking process shots for later blogging.

I think I am doing today what my younger two kids did last week. They each had a day where they cried about going to a new school because they didn't know what to expect and were worried about it. The next day they were fine and have continued to be fine with only small signs that they still have increased levels of tension. Here's hoping that tomorrow I can be back to excited anticipation instead of stressed worry.

In good news, we have Schlock Mercenary water bottles to sell at WorldCon. The Writing Excuses badge ribbons also arrived. We now have all our merchandise in hand. Tomorrow I will go shopping to acquire booth supplies and dressings.

Mirrored from onecobble.com.

Remaking a Formal Dress

Last May I bought a dress. I bought it, not because of what it was, but because of what I could make from it.

I loved the bright color and the full swing of the skirt. It reminded me of all those long dresses that Ginger Rogers used to wear when dancing with Fred Astaire. Or perhaps the fancy dress Grace Kelly wore in High Society. I knew I could make something from it, but first I had to get rid of the lace and ruffles.

You can see that the skirt was extremely sheer. There must have been a slip or underskirt which got separated from the dress. My first step was to solve that problem by adding additional layers of chiffon. I chose a yellow with a hot pink underskirt. The different colors would show through creating shifting highlights as the skirt moved.

I used the skirt of the dress as a pattern. It was pretty simple since the skirt was a full circle.

The skirt was also far too long. Its original owner must have been taller than me or habitually wore seven inch platform shoes. So I trimmed the skirt and hemmed it.

There is a lot of sewing involved when you have three layers of full-circle skirt. Particularly when you have to hem around twice to get the proper narrow roll. The resulting dress was wearable, but exceedingly simple. It was time for me to take some of that ruffle and some of the left over yellow chiffon and make the dress much more attractive.

I played with draping and wrapping the fabric that I had available. The waist of the dress was high, so I knew that I wanted to add a wide belt to create a better silhouette. I also decided that those triangle sleeves needed to go. Unfortunately none of the pieces of orange chiffon were wide enough to make sleeves. So I got creative.

I sewed together two segments of ruffle so that the hemmed bits were together.

I used the sleeve piece from a dress pattern I had, making sure that the seam ran down the center of the sleeve. Once the sleeve was constructed, I slit open this sleeve seam so that it gaps open attractively along the top of my arm only being joined at the top of the sleeve and at my elbow. I'll try to get a picture of this the next time I try on the dress.

I decided to make long drapes off my shoulders to add interest in the back. Besides I had to do something with all that left over ruffle. You can see the huge pile of it on the floor. I still have a pile of it even after the dress is done. I'll hold it against future alterations or repairs.

The next steps involved a lot of hand sewing. Most of the things could have been done on machine, but tacking things into place by hand made unpicking and re-sewing much easier. I did a lot as I was figuring out the best ways to accomplish the look I'd hoped for.

I am pleased with the result. I'll take pictures when I'm wearing it and all dressed up, but for now you can see it on the hanger.

I loved this project. I loved breathing new life into an old dress. I loved taking it apart and re-using the old pieces. My brain is already burbling with ideas about how to do this again, only with a completely different dress. For now I need to put my dress aside until a week from Saturday when I get to wear it to the Hugos.

Mirrored from onecobble.com.

Sometimes the Timing is Just Right

Howard went off to GenCon and I had a few days where I was done with GenCon planning and not yet into the urgent pre-WorldCon scramble. The kids needed and outing, so we went to the zoo.

We arrived just as some of the early arrivers were leaving for lunch, and so we got a close parking space. We wandered in to the zoo where we found that the baby elephant was taking a bath. I snapped a picture just as she flapped her ears adorably.

We wandered onward to discover that the bird show was due to begin in just moments. We found seats near the front. They weren't shaded, but when the ranger asked everyone to scoot in, we scooted right into the shade. The bird Show was amazing and I had a couple of perfectly timed shots.

We walked out of the bird show to discover that the carousel had no line. We all found animals to ride, except Link who declared his disinterest in the whole thing with a particularly 13-year-old-boy tone. He elected to sit on one of the carousel benches. I told him to make sure he rolled his eyes a lot as we went round.

We wandered up the hill and had lunch at uncrowded tables because everyone else had already eaten by then. As we were ordering lunch a woman came up to me. She was a Schlock Mercenary fan and recognized me from a presentation I gave at LTUE last February. After lunch, we happened into the small animal house just as they were feeding many of the small animals. This meant that the animals were active and cute rather than sleeping. There we met the Cheshire Cat.

The sign said "Sand Cat" but I know that face. He blinked at us in a very impressive and knowing way.

We exited the zoo just as rush hour was headed into it's peak. Traffic was heavy all the way home, but despite the truly impressive construction zones we had to traverse, there were no serious traffic blockages. Home was calm and welcoming. Howard called and we talked for a good thirty minutes about the convention and the zoo. Then we wished each other a Happy Anniversary. All is as it should be.

Mirrored from onecobble.com.

Promises

The fabric was cut and folded neatly, ready to be sewn. When it was done it would be a fairy dress, floaty and beautiful to match the dreams of a young girl who fell in love with a picture on a pattern in the craft store. Gleek clutched that pattern and begged with big brown eyes. I couldn't say no. Then we raided our fabric stash at home and found the pieces we needed. All was ready and waiting. And waiting. And waiting. Other sewing bits got piled on top as I occasionally rummaged in my sewing box to make various emergency repairs. Mostly the sewing box resided in the closet with the cut fabric hidden inside. Life marched on. One Halloween passed, then another. The dream dress was mostly forgotten, except every so often when the Gleek would remember and remind me. I would sigh and carefully not promise exactly when the dress would be done. Promises matter. I don't want to break them. Yet the cut pieces of fabric were like a promise. They were a task incomplete.

Another dress was dreamed of. This time it was mine. I bought an out of date dress and had grand plans to re-make it into something lovely. Stolen minutes went into the measuring and cutting of bright chiffon. Time came to hem and I dusted off my sewing machine. I pulled out my sewing box of supplies. The pieces of that previous dream dress were there. My dress needed to be done within a week. It made sense to work on it first. The project with a deadline takes precedence. Yet my kids so often must be patient when I have a project. They spent the summer at home instead of with lessons and trips because I needed the calendar to be empty. They foraged for their own meals far more often than I want to confess. My kids must wait on me for permission and for most of their dreams. Gleek's dress had been waiting on me for two years. I put aside my bright chiffon and finished a fairy dress for my daughter to dance in. She looked beautiful.

Mirrored from onecobble.com.

Howard on the Eve of our 18th Anniversary

Tomorrow is the 18th anniversary of the day I married Howard. This year I'll be spending the day at the zoo with the kids. Howard will be spending it running a booth at GenCon. This is right in line with our tradition of not planning our lives around anniversary celebrations. The best possible celebration of our marriage is living and working together each day. Also, with all the other exhausting planning that we have to do for summer conventions, neither of us has left over energy for orchestrating an anniversary event. That said, I do try to take at least a minute or two on the anniversary day to look at that guy I married and think about how lucky I am.

There he is. Making me laugh, just as he does almost every day of our lives.

The banana has a story, of course. Howard was standing at the booth next to Tracy Hickman (of Dragonlance). Howard put down the book he was showing to customers and in a signed-too-many-things-today haze, Tracy picked it up and signed it. They joked together that Tracy would probably just auto-sign whatever was in front of him. Howard put it to the test by placing a banana in front of Tracy. So Howard had a Tracy Hickman autographed banana for lunch.

I made a really good decision all those years ago when I held his hand and said "I will."

Mirrored from onecobble.com.

Gleek Worries about Her New School

"I don't want to go to New School. I want to go to Old School!" Gleek sobbed while curled up in my lap. We are three weeks away from the beginning of school, and Gleek's fears about her new academic program boiled over. She listed all the friends she will miss. She talked of how stressed she feels. "I don't want to go to school!" she cried. All of the things she was leaving behind were concrete and easily visualized. All of the things ahead were vague, uncertain, and therefore fearful.

I held her tight and let her cry. I did my crying and fretting last Spring when we made the decision to switch her to a new school and into a gifted program. It still feels like the right decision, but Gleek's fears have a solid basis in reality. The switch is going to be hard. The work will be much more demanding than what she has been doing. Adjustment is going to be difficult. It is possible that four months from now we'll be shifting and doing something else. I held my crying girl and knew I had the power to solve her fears. I could switch her back to Old School at any time. I won't do it until we've given this plan a solid try. We need the information that attempting this will give us.

What I expect to happen is that Gleek will pull out of this afternoon's emotional low. She will be fine for the next few weeks. She will be scared and worried on the first day of school. Then things will be new and interesting. Gleek thrives on things that are new and interesting. There will be more tears and worries. I will hold her and listen just as I did today. When the litany of fears begins to repeat I will find a distraction for her, just as I did today.

Mirrored from onecobble.com.

GenCon and WorldCon

GenCon will open its doors to the public first thing Thursday morning, but I'm already done with it. My very last responsibility to GenCon was to drop Howard off at the airport this morning. He's going to have a great time. It will be a fantastic show. I'm sorry I won't get to visit with our fantastic crew there, but at the moment I'm very glad to get to stay home. I'm done with all the last minute emails and merchandising decisions. Now I can focus my attention on WorldCon which I will be attending. First item on the WorldCon list: Finish my dress. I'm loving working on it and I'll write up a process post with pictures when it is done. With all the frantic GenCon thoughts out of the way I can look forward to WorldCon with anticipation.

Mirrored from onecobble.com.

Parenting is sometimes a tangled mess

Inciting Incident:

Gleek was riding her sister's bike without permission and after dark. She failed to get off the bike until after I had ordered her to do so five different times. I decided that the delay was blatant enough that I needed to not let it slide.

Complicating Issue:

I was not sure what consequence to apply. Gleek was very calm about my frustration and wasn't acting in a way that interpreted as contrite. In hindsight I can see that she was honestly trying to figure out why she hadn't listened to me. I declared that a consequence was necessary and decided that step one would be for Gleek to describe out loud to Howard how she failed to listen.

Howard was in the middle of business things and packing. He'd picked up steam and was making a final run at getting it all done. I did not communicate with Howard what I hoped for from Gleek's recitation. Gleek in her turn was fearful that Howard would yell and be angry with her. She balled up all her emotions and buried them deep, thus her recitation seemed like she did not care about what she had done. Howard reacted to her seeming casual attitude by increasing the severity in his voice until he provoked a reaction.

The Muddle in the Middle:

I began to feel bad for derailing Howard's packing, for not alerting him to the script, for putting Gleek in a situation where she would cry. Gleek's buried emotions burst forth and she confessed that she feels scared of lots of things and is embarrassed about it. She also said she doesn't know why she often doesn't obey. Howard stepped out a bit to let Gleek and I talk. I flailed around trying not to undermine the parenting statements Howard had made, while still trying to help Gleek feel better. Gleek told how she had been planning to turn herself into an obedient little robot girl. I said I didn't want one of those.

Sorting it out and finding resolution, sort of:

In the end there was listening and hugging. I fessed up to feeling like I'd handled it wrong. Gleek fessed up that she felt like it was her fault in the first place. Howard said he was sad that Gleek is scared of him scolding her. I felt bad for hauling him into a conflict which was primarily between Gleek and I to begin with. I simultaneously felt like I did exactly right in involving Howard in parenting our daughter. Gleek said that the biggest consequence in the world for her would be if we stopped loving her and talking to her. Howard said that was a consequence which we could never apply because we always love her. No matter what.

In the end we all decided that the whole emotional mess was probably consequence enough for everyone and that it will all look better in the morning.

Thank goodness there are mornings after.

Mirrored from onecobble.com.

Staring at Another Busy Week

My list is full of urgent tasks. I am supposed to be ignoring them because it is Sunday and I don't work on Sunday. Except that somehow I slid into working today without meaning to. Oh I didn't ship orders or do accounting, but I did answer a business email. Howard and I have had a dozen conversations about business things relating to merchandise or upcoming conventions. I spent an hour updating Howard's electronic calendar to reflect all of his GenCon events. And I was supposed to pack his suitcase today. I know these things don't belong in my Sunday. I do a much better job of keeping my Sundays holy when I'm not scrambling to keep up.

However, I spent three hours at church. During those hours I listened to speakers and lessons. I felt my heart open and some of my pathway in the weeks to come felt a little more clear. I also wrote down even more things which I need to not forget to do. I always emerge from church with a list of To Do. The good news is that at least 50% of that list was about house, family, and spirituality. The bad news is that my ever-expanding list expanded yet again. Top on that list was taking Kiki driving. We're running out of time on her permit and she needs to take her road test soon. I did that first. Then I sat down with my kids and watched the Sci Fi movie classic The Cat from Outer Space. They loved it. If you add in two family meals, the total is 7 hours where my focus was on family and spirituality. This is good, but it is not the same as having a whole peaceful sabbath day. I was hoping to spend time working on my Hugo dress or on the guest blog entry which I have 90% percolated in my head. Perhaps I'll get to them later this evening, if I don't run out of evening.

Want to see my list?

Sunday July 31

Write guest blog

Editing on 2010 photobook

water plants

Pack Howard for GenCon

Closet and cubby organization

Assign toy cupboard cleaning

Trim and Hem skirt

Cut and sew new sleeves

Monday Aug 1

Create coupon

Learn Howard's blogging tools

Have kids pick outing for while Howard is gone

Price Sheet for GenCon

Travel book for GenCon

Update Swipe

Return library books

Accounting

Double check Kiki's school credits

Look up embroidered patches

Laundry

Send out Queries

Tuesday Aug 2

(empty because I know that half of Sunday's and Monday's things will land here.)

Take Howard to airport

Wednesday Aug 3

Make Table raisers for WorldCon

Table drape and staple gun for WorldCon

Booth Schedule for WorldCon

Price List for WorldCon

Table dressing for WorldCon

Collect product for WorldCon

Assemble magnet sets and Bundles

Dry clean tuxedo

Read for Writer's group

Thursday Aug 4

Sewing Hugo dress

Sew kid clothing repairs

kid outing?

Friday Aug 5

(Currently empty because half of the stuff above will land here.)

Kiki's friends come over?

Not included on this list: three meals per day. Kid chores. House chores. Random questions and needs. The dispensing of bandaids. Daily shipping of Schlock store merchandise. Answering customer support emails. Fielding phone calls from Howard because he needs me to look something up for him while he is at GenCon. And sitting staring at the walls because my brain is tired.

This is a busy time. All the things we are busy with are things for which I am exceedingly grateful. So even though I'm complaining a little in this post, I'm not in any way unhappy with the things on my plate.

Mirrored from onecobble.com.

Cliche and Shopping

Yesterday I took my daughters for a mother daughter shopping trip. We were out for hours, had a marvelous time, and came home with big bags of new things. I say new, but since we spent most of the time at at thrift store, the things were only new to us. This does not diminish the delight of my girls at their new things. Today I realized that my emotional reserves were empty and that I needed some time by myself. I didn't need to be physically alone, though that would have worked, what I needed was to reside in spaces where I got to direct my steps without negotiation and where no one expected anything of me. I went shopping again, because that long trip with my daughters was all focused on them. I've long had wardrobe gaps to fill and worn out clothing to replace.

I remember our truly lean years. During those years we could not afford to buy clothing that cost more than $1 per item and then only if we really needed it. I shopped the thrift stores on dollar days and thought longingly of the days when I could buy $6 clothing on a whim. I thought about that as I wheeled my cart full of $4-$7 items to the check out stand. I am truly fortunate.

The goddess of shopping smiled upon me and my daughters these past two days. We each had a wishlist and each of us found something perfect to match it. This also held true at the clearance shoe section of Target. I can now pack for WorldCon feeling more confident and a little sheepish that part of my confidence is dependent upon clothing. Feeling like I look good makes me stand taller and walk stronger. This is true even though I might wish that all my confidence welled up from within.

Mirrored from onecobble.com.