Leon Stevens's Blog, page 32

Tuesday Top Ten: Reasons to…

Reasons to…what? Yeah, you know. I have no say in what’s going to happen today in the United States. Unfortunately, what happens in the United States has ramifications around the globe.

But this is not going to be a political post, we’ve had enough coverage over the last 10 weeks…wait. The last 2 years? No. 4 years. 8?

Let’s just have some fun, shall we?

Top Ten Reasons People Do Stuff

10. “Why not?” First uttered by Columbus when asked why he wanted to swim across the Strait of Gibraltar. His next words were, “Look! It’s right there.”
9. “Not because it’s easy, but because it is hard.” JFK speaking about going to the moon? Nope. This is said by every writer who decided to publish a book.
8. “What’s the worse that can happen?” Famous words by Oppenheim, and more recently, Vinton Cerf and Bob Kahn*
7. “He dared me to.” Adopted by every teen male to justify any action deemed impossible. Usually ends…not good.
6. “They said it can’t be done.” So close to the same as #7.
5. “I’m bored.” Said Albert Einstein after looking at his 100th patent for a new gumball machine.
4. “All the cool kids are doing it.” Ahh. Peer pressure. The only reason why people smoke or drink White Claw, Mountain Dew, and Budweiser.
3. “I had to get out of the house.” Said every person with a nagging husband, wife, or kids. The only reason Marco Polo went on that long road trip.
2. “I don’t know.” Often heard as the mumble, “Iunoo” and accompanied by a shoulder shrug and is the proper response to “Why in the heck did you do that?”
1. “Because it’s there.” Usually attributed to Edmund Hillary, the first to summit Mount Everest, but in actual fact he said it in response when Tenzing Norgay asked Hillary why he’s taking the last danish off the buffet table.

*You can look it up or I can tell you**.

In case you missed yesterday’s post and needed some more politics in your day:

All You Need to Know*: The Electoral College

**They are credited with the invention of the internet.

Leon Stevens is a multi-genre author, composer, guitarist, songwriter, and an artist, with a Bachelor of Music and Education. He published his first book of poetry, Lines by Leon: Poems, Prose, and Pictures in January 2020, followed by a book of original classical guitar compositions, Journeys, and a short story collection of science fiction/post-apocalyptic tales called The Knot at the End of the Rope and Other Short Stories. His newest publications are the novella trilogy, The View from Here, which is a continuation of one of his short stories, a new collection of poetry titled, A Wonder of Words, and his latest sci-fi mystery, Euphrates Vanished.

My new book page: http://books.linesbyleon.com/

Free books? Sign up for my bi-weekly newsletter and choose one or more!

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All You Need to Know*: The Electoral College

*For entertainment purposes only. Information may contain dairy, nuts, and falsehoods. Not affiliated with any party or candidate. Proceed with caution and and a sense of humor. All people and places are used in a fictitious manner.

Now that’s out of the way, let’s begin.

From my knowledge of US politics, the electoral college is not a higher institute of learning with courses like:

Statistics: You can make them lieBallot design: Why the first name is often the first choiceCampaigning 101: Shaking hands and kissing babies. Out of style?Geography 101: Know your capitalsSocial Studies: What cultural stereotypes are acceptable?
(this is the easiest course with a one question multiple choice exam on the first day)

If you are not an American, you probably do not understand the electoral college system. If you are American, there is a good chance you might not understand the electoral college system.

Fear not. As a non-American, I’ll explain it to you like your friend, the crypo “expert”, explains blockchain. So from my lack of knowledge of US politics, this is how the electoral college works: First of all not all states are created equal. Sorry, North Dakota.

The number of electoral college votes each state is assigned is determined by this simple formula developed by three of the founding fathers.

(M – K) X (W – C) / (S – Wa)

Where:
M=the number of McDonalds
K= the number of KFCs
W= the number of Walmarts
C=the number of Chipotles
S= the number of 7/11s
Wa= the number of Wawas

Now, electoral college votes are actual people, chosen off the street every four years by two people named Neil* and Theresa* (*not their real names) by asking passersby the simple question, “Hey, wanna take this to the capital?”

To keep it simple and to make North Dakota feel better, let use it as an example. It has 3 ECs (that’s what the GenZers are calling it). If more than 50% of voters vote for the Republican Presidential candidate (not using any names so I can recycle this post in 2028) that candidate gets all the votes. All three of them…(and there was much rejoicing). Then those 3 people now have to: and I quote:

“…meet at the place designated by that state, on the first Monday after the second Wednesday in December to cast their votes for President and Vice
President of the United States.”

Yes, that’s right, the first Monday after the second Wednesday in December. This is usually at Pam’s place, but depending on what teams are playing Monday Night Football, it may be at Hank’s.

So, now that the 3 votes for the republican candidate are safely stored in a cereal box (usually the non-partisan, Corn Flakes), the only thing to is wait until January 6th. Why Jan. 6th? By that time the holiday hangovers are over.

Then the boxes are opened and some poor sucker has to stand in front of congress and count each vote out loud by saying, “That’s one vote for [candidate]”, and placing it in a neat pile in front of them. At the end, they crouch down and declare the winner by eyeballing to see which pile is taller, hence the term: tally the votes.

And there you have it. One person’s understanding of the US electoral system.

-Leon

Leon Stevens is a multi-genre author, composer, guitarist, songwriter, and an artist, with a Bachelor of Music and Education. He published his first book of poetry, Lines by Leon: Poems, Prose, and Pictures in January 2020, followed by a book of original classical guitar compositions, Journeys, and a short story collection of science fiction/post-apocalyptic tales called The Knot at the End of the Rope and Other Short Stories. His newest publications are the novella trilogy, The View from Here, which is a continuation of one of his short stories, a new collection of poetry titled, A Wonder of Words, and his latest sci-fi mystery, Euphrates Vanished.

My new book page: http://books.linesbyleon.com/

Free books? Sign up for my bi-weekly newsletter and choose one or more!

books.linesbyleon.com/Newslettersignup

Do you like cover reveals? Does it build excitement or would you rather an author just show it already?

Music Monday : Bands you’ve never heard of (Part II)

Maybe not as unknown as last week’s feature (Helix), but I find few people who know who Krokus is (not that I have been going around asking). For the longest time in the 80s I thought they were Canadian, and by the time I stopped listening to them, their origin didn’t matter, but this band from Switzerland was on heavy rotation on our turntables.

In 1980, anything that had to do with Asian countries was cool and exotic right down to the fake oriental guitar riff and singing about geisha girls. I think this came out around the same time as “Turning Japanese” by The Vapors.

Wait. Did he just say, “My yellow girlfriend“? Didn’t catch that one when I was fourteen. Yikes.

One of the criticisms of the band was their unoriginality, but it’s obvious who thought the other’s logo was cool:

1981

1893

So, onto the music. You only get one guess which band was a major influence in this one:

1983 saw the release of Headhunter which was less AC/DC and a bit more Judas Priest in my opinion:

Scorpions you say?

Back to AC/DC:

1984 saw the release of their highest charting album.

Motley Crue had already covered Smokin’ in the Boys room, so…

Midnight Maniac reached #10 on the US rock chart.

I never new until today that this next song was written by Bryan Adams.

Bryan Adams has written some great songs but this one doesn’t work for me for a metal turned hard rock turned weaker rock…well maybe it does. Never bought another album. Maybe it I have time I’ll find a newer tune.

-Leon

Leon Stevens is a multi-genre author, composer, guitarist, songwriter, and an artist, with a Bachelor of Music and Education. He published his first book of poetry, Lines by Leon: Poems, Prose, and Pictures in January 2020, followed by a book of original classical guitar compositions, Journeys, and a short story collection of science fiction/post-apocalyptic tales called The Knot at the End of the Rope and Other Short Stories. His newest publications are the novella trilogy, The View from Here, which is a continuation of one of his short stories, a new collection of poetry titled, A Wonder of Words, and his latest sci-fi mystery, Euphrates Vanished.

My new book page: http://books.linesbyleon.com/

Free books? Sign up for my bi-weekly newsletter and choose one or more!

books.linesbyleon.com/Newslettersignup

Songs for a Sunday: The Small Glories

How do I find the musicians to feature on Sunday? Often I’ll catch a snippet of a song on the radio of see them featured on a music show.

If a band can draw you in after a few measures, there’s something special in the music.

Not too bad, right? But that wasn’t the first song I heard from them. It was Oh My Love.

I know what you are thinking. What a great American duo, playing that down-home Appalachian folk inspired country music.

And you’d be wrong. You’re way off. The Small Glories is a Canadian folk duo from Winnipeg*, Manitoba. composed of Cara Luft and J.D. Edwards

-Leon

*Fun fact: Winnipeg is home the the NHL’s Winnipeg Jets who have stared their season 10-1 and are first in the standings. Now fans are on the edge of their seats wondering when that bubble will burst.

Want to read more music blogs? Here are some of the ones I follow: Mostly Music Covers, Take it Easy, Beetley Pete, A Sound Day, PowerPop… An Eclectic Collection of Pop Culture, SuperdekesVinylReviews, Fox Reviews Rock

Leon Stevens is a multi-genre author, composer, guitarist, songwriter, and an artist, with a Bachelor of Music and Education. He published his first book of poetry, Lines by Leon: Poems, Prose, and Pictures in January 2020, followed by a book of original classical guitar compositions, Journeys, and a short story collection of science fiction/post-apocalyptic tales called The Knot at the End of the Rope and Other Short Stories. His newest publications are the novella trilogy, The View from Here, which is a continuation of one of his short stories, a new collection of poetry titled, A Wonder of Words, and his latest sci-fi mystery, Euphrates Vanished.

My new book page: http://books.linesbyleon.com/

Free books? Sign up for my bi-weekly newsletter and choose one or more!

books.linesbyleon.com/Newslettersignup

Weekend Wrap-up Nov. 2nd

Now that Halloween is over, can we just get 2 weeks without any holiday frenzy or decorations since Remembrance Day is coming?

No?

Sigh.

-Leon

In case you missed it:Weekend Wrap-up Nov. 2ndFree Book Friday Nov. 1st: The first author?Thursday Thoughts: Halloween MilestonesWeird Wednesday: Halloween TreatsTuesday Top Ten: Sitcoms

Hope you enjoyed the recap! Feel free to share it with others.

Leon Stevens is a multi-genre author, composer, guitarist, songwriter, and an artist, with a Bachelor of Music and Education. He published his first book of poetry, Lines by Leon: Poems, Prose, and Pictures in January 2020, followed by a book of original classical guitar compositions, Journeys, and a short story collection of science fiction/post-apocalyptic tales called The Knot at the End of the Rope and Other Short Stories. His newest publications are the novella trilogy, The View from Here, which is a continuation of one of his short stories, a new collection of poetry titled, A Wonder of Words, and his latest sci-fi mystery, Euphrates Vanished.

My new book page: http://books.linesbyleon.com/

Free books? Sign up for my bi-weekly newsletter and choose one or more!

books.linesbyleon.com/Newslettersignup

Free Book Friday Nov. 1st: The first author?

Every year I forget some of the national days throughout the year and find myself scrambling to find related content. Fortunately, I just happen to have the transcript of a conversation detailing the first fiction author.

“What are you doing?”

“Painting pictures on the wall.”

“Mom’s gonna flip.”

[shrugs]

“What’s that supposed to be?”

“It’s a wooly mammoth solving crimes on roller skates.”

“That’s ridiculous. Woolly mammoths haven’t been invented yet. Besides, you spelled woolly wrong.”

“It’s not supposed to be real, spelling dork. It’s just for fun.”

“Oh.” [pointing] “Then what’s that, then?”

“This? It’s a young boy finding out he’s a wizard. He goes to wizard school and makes friends and does stuff like battle against evil.”

“I like the mammoth better.”

-Leon

The story behind Free Book Friday:

I’ve met many authors and readers during my time marketing, cross-promoting, and blogging. I think writers have a responsibility to inform readers about all the indie authors out there in the very crowded world of book publishing. You can’t do it alone, and why would you when you have a supportive group available?

Readers don’t just read one author – they stick with their favorite genres. Therein lies the power in cross-promotion. If one of my readers buys a book from an author I promote, then chances are there will be a reciprocal effect, or so is the hope. Do I want to boost sales? Of course I do. Do I want to boost other’s sales? Why not. It’s called karma.

Some free book offers require a newsletter sign-up, which is a small non-monetary price to pay to try out a new indie author.

Reads From StoryOrigin

StoryOrigin allows authors to advertise their books to each other’s audience. I hope you have been able to discover a new favorite!

Free Books/KU Sales/Purchase Links Review Copies (These are free!)

Review copies: Like reviewing books? Try my two poetry collections: Lines by Leon and A Wonder of Words

Newsletter:

Sign up for my bi-weekly newsletter and receive a free book (poetry or science fiction): Leon’s Newsletter

Leon Stevens is a multi-genre author, composer, guitarist, songwriter, and an artist, with a Bachelor of Music and Education. He published his first book of poetry, Lines by Leon: Poems, Prose, and Pictures in January 2020, followed by a book of original classical guitar compositions, Journeys, and a short story collection of science fiction/post-apocalyptic tales called The Knot at the End of the Rope and Other Short Stories. His newest publications are the novella trilogy, The View from Here, which is a continuation of one of his short stories, a new collection of poetry titled, A Wonder of Words, and his latest sci-fi mystery, Euphrates Vanished.

My new book page: http://books.linesbyleon.com/

Free books? Sign up for my bi-weekly newsletter and choose one or more!

books.linesbyleon.com/Newslettersignup

Thursday Thoughts: Halloween Milestones

I grew up in the 70s. There I said it. I’m sure some Halloween milestones for kids are still the same, while others might not be have been experienced.

The first pumpkin treat container. Cons: Didn’t hold much. Weak handle. It kept banging on your leg. Pros: It kinda smelled nice.Getting your first store-bought treat. Most of my early years of gathering netted homemade confections: Popcorn balls, fudge, or assorted squares. Then there were the apples. Terrifying, because there was always the rumor that apples contained pins or razorblades. Which was ridiculous because if you got an apple, you know which house it came from.The bag of chips. Almost as good as the full size chocolate bar. Almost.Being able to pick your own costume. That meant your mom had to make it for you. No Spirit Halloween or Amazon. And the more difficult it was, the worse it looked. Sorry, Mom. I know you tried, but I’m sure I cried…Going out unsupervised. Parents. What were they thinking?The graduation from the pumpkin to the pillowcase. This is probably the greatest one and often you had to run home to empty it and go back out. This made you look like you didn’t have any and the home owners would pity you at the end of the night and shovel fistfuls of candy into the gaping maw. Sneaking out for gate night/devil’s night. Was this a thing where you grew up? Basically, the night before Halloween was the precursor to the movie, “The Purge” where you could go out and vandalize stuff, egging houses and soaping windows. But I didn’t do that…right? Wouldn’t it make more sense to do it the night after to the houses that gave out crappy treats (popcorn balls, apples), or nothing at all? But we didn’t do that, Mom. Honest.The “How old can I be before this doesn’t work anymore?” As long as you had a costume, well, a good costume, you could extend your candy gathering career to…16?The “No costume experiment” Just as it sounds. Not as successful as #7.Trick or Drink. Just as it sounds.Bah! Humbug. Owning a house and turning off the lights on Halloween and hiding in the basement watching a movie.

Was that an egg hitting the house? Kids these days…

-Leon

Leon Stevens is a multi-genre author, composer, guitarist, songwriter, and an artist, with a Bachelor of Music and Education. He published his first book of poetry, Lines by Leon: Poems, Prose, and Pictures in January 2020, followed by a book of original classical guitar compositions, Journeys, and a short story collection of science fiction/post-apocalyptic tales called The Knot at the End of the Rope and Other Short Stories. His newest publications are the novella trilogy, The View from Here, which is a continuation of one of his short stories, a new collection of poetry titled, A Wonder of Words, and his latest sci-fi mystery, Euphrates Vanished.

My new book page: http://books.linesbyleon.com/

Free books? Sign up for my bi-weekly newsletter and choose one or more!

books.linesbyleon.com/Newslettersignup

Weird Wednesday: Halloween Treats

Do you know what this is?

The answer, if you are wondering, is: Delicious.

Also, in case you are wondering, it was the Halloween treat I coveted the most, along side the full size chocolate bar and the full bag of chips.

If you are in the UK, Australia, or Canada, you will know I’m talking about the Wagon Wheel. You will also know that there is an ongoing controversy that they are getting smaller.

Before I continue, I know that my American readers are scratching their heads thinking, “Isn’t that a Moon Pie?”, and the answer is: No. This is a Moon Pie:

Yeah, I know. They like very similar, but that’s not what I’m here for today. Back to the controversy.

Argument against: As children, our hands are smaller, giving the impression that the treat is actually the size of a Conestoga wagon wheel.

Argument for: They’re rippin’ us off! Also, I swear the wheel used to touch the sides of the cellophane package and now it bounces around like a kid in an inflatable castle.

Is there any verified proof either way? According to the article: http://www.appliancecity.co.uk/news/updates/is-our-chocolate-getting-smaller,

“…during the 80s they saw their first reduction from a 79mm width to a 74mm width. Following this, they shrunk again sometime between their 2006 weight of 41g and today’s weight of 36g. Again this is no small change, a 12% decrease is something you’d be sure to notice.“

Ah-ha! Got ya.

I know it’s bothering you that you don’t know the difference between the Wagon Wheel and the Moon Pie, so here is a verified expert in something, explaining it in a carefully scripted and well-planned lunch break lecture in a company store room:

-Leon

Leon Stevens is a multi-genre author, composer, guitarist, songwriter, and an artist, with a Bachelor of Music and Education. He published his first book of poetry, Lines by Leon: Poems, Prose, and Pictures in January 2020, followed by a book of original classical guitar compositions, Journeys, and a short story collection of science fiction/post-apocalyptic tales called The Knot at the End of the Rope and Other Short Stories. His newest publications are the novella trilogy, The View from Here, which is a continuation of one of his short stories, a new collection of poetry titled, A Wonder of Words, and his latest sci-fi mystery, Euphrates Vanished.

My new book page: http://books.linesbyleon.com/

Free books? Sign up for my bi-weekly newsletter and choose one or more!

books.linesbyleon.com/Newslettersignup

Tuesday Top Ten: Sitcoms

Sitcoms change with the times. I think the first sitcoms I remember watching were Gilligan’s Island and All in the Family. Being in Canada, we would also get BBC programs like Fawlty Towers and Some Mothers do ‘Ave ‘Em.

I find it odd that when some sitcoms are rerun, there are disclaimers that they are run as originally aired and the content may be offensive. Yet some current shows can make you cringe, the “I can’t believe they just said that” factor, but humor comes in all forms and we always have the option to change the channel. Family Guy and It’s Always Funny in Philadelphia come to mind.

Animation changed the classifications of sitcoms. The Simpsons were must see TV for the better part of two decades, and even though they are still going, it’s a show I don’t tend to watch very much. But now there are many animated sitcoms available.

So many shows missed the list. Blackadder, Red Dwarf, Night Court (the original), Rick and Morty, Three’s Company, Taxi, 30 Rock, The Larry Sander’s Show, Curb your Enthusiasm.

There’s a top ten right there.

Top Ten Sitcoms

10. Letterkenny
9. Modern Family
8. WKRP
7. Parks and Recreation
6. Futurama 
5. Friends
4. The Office
3. The Office (BBC)
2. The Big Bang Theory
1. Seinfeld

I’ll leave you with the most meta moment in sitcom history:

What are some of your favorites that I may have overlooked?

Leon Stevens is a multi-genre author, composer, guitarist, songwriter, and an artist, with a Bachelor of Music and Education. He published his first book of poetry, Lines by Leon: Poems, Prose, and Pictures in January 2020, followed by a book of original classical guitar compositions, Journeys, and a short story collection of science fiction/post-apocalyptic tales called The Knot at the End of the Rope and Other Short Stories. His newest publications are the novella trilogy, The View from Here, which is a continuation of one of his short stories, a new collection of poetry titled, A Wonder of Words, and his latest sci-fi mystery, Euphrates Vanished.

My new book page: http://books.linesbyleon.com/

Free books? Sign up for my bi-weekly newsletter and choose one or more!

books.linesbyleon.com/Newslettersignup

Music Monday Oct 30: A band you’ve probably never heard of.

Unless you grew up in Canada in the 80s, that is.

Helix

They formed in Kitchener, Ontario in the late 70s and were primarily a bar band before recording two EPs, Breaking Loose and White Lace and Black Leather.

Their first full album, No Rest for the Wicked, saw them change their image from jeans/tshirts, to the leather outfits hard rock bands like Motley Crue and others were wearing.

Wait. Did I say Motley Crue was a hard rock band? I never considered them to be heavy metal, and we could spend hours debating the genre and the criteria…

Anyway, this was the album my friends and I played the shit out of.

It was the age of videos, but I could only find one for the debut single.

Were they any different from the plethora of bands in the early 80s? Not different enough to leap to the top of the charts, only getting to #186 with this album.

Their next album, Walkin’ the Razor’s Edge, doubled the sales of the previous album.

Rock You was their biggest hit making it to #27

What’s a rock band without a ballad or a cover song? Here’s their version of A Foot in Cold Water’s Make me Do Anything You Want.

Is there an AC/DC influence in this next one?

Shades of Judas Priest in this next one:

Speaking of power ballads, here’s a track from their fifth album, released in 1985. Note the outfits and hair. Were they now a hair metal band?

After that, I moved on and never continued following them them. They do the classic rock festivals around the country:

I’m torn between feeling kinda sad that this is what becomes of many bands or being happy that they still get to play music.

-Leon

Leon Stevens is a multi-genre author, composer, guitarist, songwriter, and an artist, with a Bachelor of Music and Education. He published his first book of poetry, Lines by Leon: Poems, Prose, and Pictures in January 2020, followed by a book of original classical guitar compositions, Journeys, and a short story collection of science fiction/post-apocalyptic tales called The Knot at the End of the Rope and Other Short Stories. His newest publications are the novella trilogy, The View from Here, which is a continuation of one of his short stories, a new collection of poetry titled, A Wonder of Words, and his latest sci-fi mystery, Euphrates Vanished.

My new book page: http://books.linesbyleon.com/

Free books? Sign up for my bi-weekly newsletter and choose one or more!

books.linesbyleon.com/Newslettersignup