Lisa R. Howeler's Blog, page 80

Special Fiction Saturday: Mercy’s Shore Chapter 31 and 32

As always, this is a continuing/serial story. I share a chapter a week and at the end of the story, after I edit and rewrite it, I self-publish it. To catch up with the story click HERE. To read the rest of the books in this series click HERE.

Let me know in the comments what you think. Or don’t. That’s okay too. *wink*

If you would prefer to read the book when it is all complete, you can pre-order a copy HERE on Amazon. It releases January 31, 2023.

Chapter 31

Telling her parents about her past, the night with Jeff, and all the dumb things she’d done in the last several years was definitely hard, but if she was going to testify against the jerk, they needed to know. It would avoid a lot more questions and concerns later.

There was one thing about her family Judi couldn’t deny. They loved her.

She didn’t know why, but they loved her and wanted the best for her even when she didn’t want it for herself.

Ellie had held her hand as she talked and when she was done her mom had hugged her close. Her dad had pounded the table once with a closed fist, stood and turned away from his family looking out the dining room window across the cow pasture. After a few minutes he said in a deep, emotion choked voice he’d like to drive to the city and let Jeff know how he felt with his fists.

“No man should ever — And my daughter. I’d like to —” Tom shook his head, fists propped against his hips, looking out the window again.

Rena had reminded him that the courts would take care of Jeff and that Judi was going to try to help that along.

Back in her apartment, Judi pulled a fuzzy blue blanket around her and turned the television on. She needed to disappear into a good movie for a while, quiet her brain before returning to work at Ben’s office tomorrow. She also needed to start looking for another part time job soon or she wouldn’t be able to pay her rent.

Half way in to the movie a knock on the door startled her and she looked at the door reluctantly. She wasn’t up to visitors tonight. She shuffled to the door and peaked out the front window.

Good grief. Why was he here?

Ben smiled, one arm leaning on the door frame as she opened it. “Hey, employee. How ya’ doing?”

She stepped back to let him in, frowning in confusion. “What are you doing here? Haven’t you had a long day?”

“Oh, well, hello to you too,” he said with a laugh as he walked by.

“Oh. Sorry. It’s just that it’s a long drive from Burkett and you’ve never stopped by before.” Her eyes widened. “Oh man. Are you here to fire me?”

Ben laughed, sitting in the chair across from the couch. “Judi, no! I’m here to check on you.” He winced apologetically. “And maybe discuss your case a little bit. We can do it in the office, but I thought it might be better on your own turf, so to speak. Also, I stopped by after visiting my parents.”

Emotionally drained or not, she knew they did need to discuss the case. “Can I make you a cup of coffee? Tea? A soda?”

“A soda would be fine.”

“How is Angie’s dad?” she asked over her shoulder as she walked toward the refrigerator. “And your sister?”

Ben spoke through a yawn. “Angie’s dad is doing okay. He came with her to pick up Amelia. He said the doctor said he didn’t have a heart attack, but needed to follow up with his cardiologist. His blood pressure was high and he seemed to have intense acid reflux. I know he’s been pushing himself too hard.” He took the soda from her and cracked it open. “As for Maggie, she’s okay too. She just found herself at a drinking party she didn’t expect to be at and wanted a ride home. I was glad she called me, but it was a little humbling when she asked if I had acted that stupid when I drank.”

Judi cracked open her own soda and sat on the couch, pulling her legs up underneath her. “If you didn’t, I can tell you I did. Alcohol made me a bigger moron than usual.” She took a sip of her soda. “How are things with you and Angie? Have you swept her off her feet yet?”

He scoffed and pushed a hand back through his hair. “Yeah, right. That’s not going to happen. She was at least civil to me and did ask if I’d watch Amelia for her, but no. I don’t see her running back to me anytime soon.”

“Would you want her to run back to you?”

He shrugged. “Doesn’t matter. She has a fiancé.”

“Who let her move up here without him and probably hasn’t even visited since they moved here.”

Ben leaned forward, placing the can on the coffee table. “Hey, you know what’s weird? I think I said I stopped to see how you were doing, not to talk about me.”

Judi shrugged her shoulder. “Yeah, but you can see I’m fine so let’s talk about you and Angie. Ben Oliver, you’re so used to burying yourself in the law, you don’t even know how to talk about your personal needs and desires.” Mischief sparked in her eye as she adopted a mock serious expression. “I for one, don’t believe that is healthy.”

Ben propped his elbows on his knees and tented his fingers together under his chin. “Let me put it this way, Miss Lambert, it may not be healthy but it also isn’t healthy to want something I can’t have.”

Judi reached for a pad of paper and a pen on the table next to her couch, crossed one leg over the other, and narrowed her eyes. “So, what you are saying, Mr. Oliver, is that you want Angie Phillipi, but you think you can’t have her. Isn’t that what you’re saying to the court?”

A deep laugh rumbled from Ben as he leaned back casually in the chair, sliding down comfortably and draping his arms over the side. “Don’t forget who is the actual lawyer here, Lambert. I’ll out maneuver you every single time. Enough about me. How are you? Nervous about this case?”

Judi tossed the pen and paper down and sighed. “You just want to know if I want to crawl back into a bottle and yes, I did want to, and yes I did visit a bar and have a whiskey, but no, I’m not ready to go back to my old lifestyle yet.” She made a face. “In fact, the alcohol made me sick to my stomach and I spent most of that night throwing up or doubled over in bed.”

His expression had faded from playful to more serious. “Tell me about that night with this guy. All of it, if you can. As your lawyer I need to know to what extent he hurt you.”

She pulled her knees up to her chest, let out a breath, and launched into the same story she’d told Ellie a year and a half ago and her parents the night before.

When she was done, Ben stood, his expression similar to her dads. He set his hands on his waist and paced behind the chair a couple of times. “Okay. Now I have another question for you, and I hope you don’t mind me asking.” He stopped pacing and looked up at her. “Have you seen a counselor about this?”

Judi pressed her forehead against her knees and groaned. “Not you too. No. I haven’t seen a counselor. I’m fine.”

“Judi, this is something that —”                                  

“Ben! Stop!” She looked up, her voice softening. “It took all I had to admit I had a drinking problem and go to AA, okay? I don’t want to go to a counselor. I’m fine. Really.” She sighed. “I appreciate you and Ellie and now my parents pushing me to talk to someone and I’ll consider it, but right now, agreeing to support this case against him is a therapy of its own.”

Ben held a hand up, palm out. “Okay. I understand. I don’t want to pressure you, but if you do decide you want to talk to someone, there is a woman at my church who is great.”

Judi took a long sip from her soda. “I’ll keep that in mind.” She stood and stretched, yawning. “For now, though, I need some sleep if I’m going to get to work on time and you look like you could use some sleep yourself.”

Rubbing his hand against his chin, Ben matched her yawn with an even bigger one. “I definitely could.”

Following him to the door, Judi leaned against the door frame as he walked out onto the landing. “Ben, have you thought of a new hairstyle?”

He turned and looked at her sleepily. “What?”

She tapped a fingertip to her chin and looked at him with a pondering expression for a moment. “It’s just — maybe Angie would be more apt to pay attention to you if —”

He turned back around. “Good night, Judi.”

“I’m just saying. Appearance is important and —”

He waved over his shoulder as he walked down the stairs toward the parking lot. “See you in the morning.”

“It’s not that you look bad now, but a new hairstyle might make her look at you differently and if she looks at you differently —”

He pressed the unlock button on his keychain and it beeped. “I appreciate the advice. I’m sure I’ll place it in the file it needs to go in.”

Judi let out a small huff of breath, watching it fog the air in front of her. “Hey, I’m just trying to help keep you from becoming a lonely, bitter old man. What can I say?”

Ben waved as he slid into the driver seat and she laughed, stepping back into the apartment and closing the door. He might be ignoring her now, but eventually he would realize her advice would be just what he needed to get what he wanted.

Chapter 32

The next afternoon, Judi’s fingers ached from all the briefs she’d typed, appointments she’d set up and paperwork she had filed. She stretched them briefly and she looked up to see Ben come in the front door with two take-away containers and a cup of coffee.

“You’re lucky,” he announced. “They had the corn beef on rye you wanted.”

He set a takeaway container in front of her and headed toward the back office, but not before she spotted the shorter haircut he was sporting.

“Hold on a minute. I thought it took you longer than usual. What’s with the new haircut?” She smirked, leaning back in the chair and folding her arms across her chest. “Looks like someone took my advice after all.” She stood and took a quick lap around him, arms still across her chest, inspecting the cut. “Looks nice. Now we can talk about what you should wear next time you go over.”

He lifted a hand and stepped toward his office. “I got my haircut because I needed it. That’s all. Don’t start getting cocky. And I can dress myself thank you very much.”

She looked him up and down. “You can dress yourself for work, but this outfit is way too uptight for —”

“Go eat your lunch.” He gestured toward her desk. “I’m going to eat mine in my office. With the door closed. Firmly closed.”

She was almost done with her lunch when the front door opened, and she looked up to see Bill Henderson walking in. Ben’s office door opened a few seconds later.

“Bill, hey there!” He stepped forward and held a hand out. Bill took it and they shook firmly. “Come on back. I’m free. I just came out to get some creamer for my coffee.”

Bill gave a quick shake of his head. “Actually, I’m on my way to a lunch date but I wanted to drop in and let you know I won’t need Friday’s appointment.”

Ben’s eyebrows raised. “You and Veronica ready to settle? I’ll call her lawyer and work out a new time.”

Bill smiled, a soft chuckle coming from him as he rubbed the beard now growing on his chin. “No, actually. She’s my lunch date.” He shrugged a shoulder. “We’re going to try to work things out.”

Ben couldn’t help smiling. “Hey, that’s great to hear. Really.”

“I know it cuts into your pay, but I want you to get a bill together for services already rendered,” Bill said. “I’ll be back next week to settle up.” He winked. “And I’ll have more time then to find out how your situation is going.”

After Bill left, Judi stifled a giggle. “Yes, Ben. How is your situation going?”

Ben sighed. “Get back to work. Oh, and I called that lawyer at the number you gave me. I set up a zoom meeting with him and his client for Friday. Does that work for you?”

“Yes. But about your situation —”

“And I’ll need the paperwork for the meeting with Jack Paulson tomorrow, so if you could pull that out of the filing cabinet, that would be great. Also, the file on Tony Murray’s deed transfer and —.”

Judi let out a dramatic exhale. “Fiiiiine. I’ll get back to work.”

Ben closed the door to his office, emerging an hour later with his coat and phone in his hand. “Hey. I just got a call from Cindy.”

“How’s her husband?”

“Doing really well. The cancer is responding to the treatment.”

That was good news for Cindy and her husband but not as great for Judi, who would probably need a new job now. “So, she will be coming back?”

“No and yes. She asked me if she could come back only a couple days a week. I told her that would work fine, and you can fill in the rest of the days. Actually, I’d love to have you on full time and work with her on the days she is here. What do you think?”

Full time work meant staying in Spencer full time. She wasn’t sure she really wanted that but it was a good offer and a good job. Beggars couldn’t be choosers.”

“Um. Yeah. I think I could handle that.”

Ben smiled and zipped up his jacket. “Great. That settles it. You start Monday.” He tossed his keys upon the air and caught them. “I’m going to head out a little early today. I want to check on Adam and see if he needs anything.”

Judi folded her arms across her chest and smirked. “Doesn’t he have two, muscular sons to help him?”

“Yeah, but they’ve got jobs that take them out of the area so —”

“So, maybe Adam isn’t the only one who you’re hoping might need some help.”

“Finish up those briefs and then you can head out and go focus on your own life, Lambert.”

Judi winked. “It’s more fun to focus on yours.” She squinted and wrinkled her nose. “You’re going to stop off at home and change, right?”

Ben looked down at clothes, holding his arms out to his side. “Why? What’s wrong with this?”

“You should look more casual and relaxed. Less formal. Go home for a pair of jeans and a t shirt and a pair of sneakers. Blue t-shirt to bring out your eyes.”

He rolled his eyes and walked away from her toward the front door. “See you tomorrow morning, Judi. 9 a.m. this time, not 10.”

“Change your clothes,” he said mockingly as he walked out onto the sidewalk. “You need to look more casual. Whatever. I look fine.”

He slid behind the steering wheel and started the car, questioning what he was even doing. He did want to see if Adam needed some help, but he could call and ask him instead of driving out there. Still, Adam would probably deny he could use the help, the same way he would if he were in the same situation.

He’d been telling the truth when he told Judi he wanted to see if Adam needed help, but, yeah, fine — He also wanted to see Angie again. He often though of how flushed she’d become that day just from him standing near her. He wasn’t naïve enough to believe he had a chance with her again, but he couldn’t deny that flustering her gave him a rush.

After he’d gone back to his apartment and changed into jeans and t-shirt like Judi had suggested, he pushed play on a Buddy Guy song and headed out, pulling into the Phillipi’s driveway as the late afternoon sun streaked at an angle through the trees and across the fields.

At the sight of a red sports car parked on the other side of the barn, he reconsidered the visit, but didn’t have time to back out of the driveway before the front door burst open and Amelia ran toward him. He opened the door, climbed out, scooped her up in his arms without even thinking. She smelled like fruit juice and peanut butter. Evidence that she’d had some jelly with her peanut butter was on her cheek.

“Ben! Come inside. William came to visit, and he brought me paints and a new doll.”

His chest tightened. “Oh yeah? Well, that was very nice of him.”

He set her on the ground, and she took his hand. “Come on! The doll has red hair and a green dress. She’s awesome!”

“I’m coming.” He laughed as she led the way, tugging him along behind her. “I’m coming.”

He didn’t really want to follow her, though, to walk into a house where he was clearly an outsider and where he’d see the man who was going to have the family he would have had if he hadn’t messed everything up.

Fiction Friday: Mercy’s Shore Chapter 29 and Chapter 30

For regular readers here, I have finished the first draft of this book and am in the editing stage. I may do something different and post the remaining chapters a few days in a row, but I still have to decide if I am keeping those chapters the way they are, so I will let you know.

If any of you are interested in being on my launch team, please let me know. That involves helping to tell others about the book and receiving a free ebook copy of the complete book to read.

Also, if there are aspects of the story you think should be flushed out or changed, please let me know. I am also looking for beta readers, who also can help me with those details.

Thank you to my bloggy friends who have stuck around and read along with all my stories or who have read them when they are done. Trust me, I do not blame you if you haven’t followed along every week. I get behind on serial stories as well!

As always, this is a continuing/serial story. I share a chapter a week and at the end of the story, after I edit and rewrite it, I self-publish it. To catch up with the story click HERE. To read the rest of the books in this series click HERE.

Let me know in the comments what you think. Or don’t. That’s okay too. *wink*

If you would prefer to read the book when it is all complete, you can pre-order a copy HERE on Amazon. It releases January 31, 2023.

Chapter 29

Judi hadn’t checked her voicemail all weekend. She knew she needed to but there were messages from Ben, Selina, a number she didn’t recognize, and a number she thought might belong to the lawyer for that girl. It was all a bit overwhelming, and she wasn’t sure which one to listen to first.

Sipping the coffee she’d picked up from the local coffee shop, she scrolled through the voicemails and clicked on Selina’s message.

“Hey, Judi, I just want to apologize. I think — yeah, well, I know I was pressuring you way too much about talking to that lawyer. I should have backed off. I just want Jeff to pay for what he’s done to you and Laura and whoever else he attacked. I got carried away. Call me later, okay? I just want to know you’re okay.”

Ben’s message was something about work, but ended asking her if she was okay, and reminding her if she needed to talk, she could call him any time.

There was also a text message from Rachel. She’d answer that one later and maybe even confess her trip to the bar. She knew Rachel wouldn’t scold her. Since she’d become Judi’s sponsor, she’d been nothing but supportive.

She clicked on the message from the number she didn’t recognize at all next.

“Judi, it’s Hannah. Don’t delete this. Here me out. I messed up, okay? I took that money for Rick. He lied to get you fired and I wanted to tell Lonny, but I need this job. Don’t be mad, okay? I mean you have that job with that lawyer, so you’ll be fine, right? Call me. Okay? I want to make it up to you somehow.”

She rolled her eyes and deleted the message.

The last voicemail was from the number she didn’t recognize, but the transcription, as bad as a translation as it was, let her know it was from the lawyer.

“Miss Lambert, hello. This is Brent Decker and I wanted to call and clarify some things about what would be expected of you if you testified in this case. If you get a chance, give me a call. I understand how difficult something like this would be for you and if you decide you simply can’t do it, both my client and I will understand.”

Laying the phone down on the counter in the kitchen, she carried her coffee with her to the living room. A large bouquet of bright red roses sat in the middle of the coffee table. They’d been delivered that morning with a card.

Out on the road again but thinking of you. Love, Evan.

She leaned over the roses and drew in their aroma with a deep inhale. Fingering the petals, she thought back on that day with Evan, how she’d completely panicked as if he would have, or could have, hurt her like Jeff tried to. Each time she remembered how concerned he’d looked, how he’d waited outside her apartment until Ellie got there, she smiled and wondered what she’d done to deserve someone like him.

Nothing. That’s what.

She’d done nothing to deserve him, and she didn’t deserve him.

But boy did she want him.

She wanted him without the heaviness of memories of that night with Jeff taunting her, though, encroaching on her joy, and trying to take it away.

A sudden anger seized her, twisted in her stomach. She stood, fists clenched. Jeff Burke had no right to have that power over her. He had no right to be able to walk around free while she and other women sat in the shadow of shame, shutting themselves up in a prison of fear.

Jeff had tried to control her, force on her what he’d wanted, which had set loose a series of emotions she didn’t know how to control. She’d tried so hard in the months afterward to drown the rage and fear with as much alcohol as she could find. She’d flirted with Brad, acted like everything was fine, picked fights with her sister, rejected any suggestion she reach out to her family or God, and told herself over and over it was all her fault.

“This isn’t your fault. You know that right?”

The words of Ellie the year before rushed back to her. There was a large part of her that still felt what had happened was her fault.  Even more so she felt like what had happened to this girl was her fault. If she had gone to the police about Jeff maybe he would have been stopped before he hurt her, or the other women he’d probably forced himself on.

She walked back to the kitchen and snatched up her phone, then grabbed an apple from the basket Ellie had dropped off the other day. Fruit had never really been her thing, but she probably should eat healthier.

She dialed Ben’s number as she sat on the couch.

“Judi!” Did he actually sound excited to hear her voice. “I’ve been trying to reach you for three days. You okay?”

“Yeah, I am.” She bit into the apple, juice dripping down her chin. She swiped at the juice with the back of her hand. “I wasn’t, but I am right now. I think anyhow. Listen, I — uh —I want to know if you’ll advise me on how to testify against that guy I told you about.”

“You want me to represent you?”

“Do I need a lawyer to represent me?”

“It would be good to have one, yes.”

She winced. “Can we exchange work time for payment?”

Ben’s laugh was warm and friendly, a departure from the tone he usually spoke to her in at work. “I’m not going to charge you for this Judi. You’re a friend.”

“I’m a friend?” She pulled the phone back from her ear for a moment and looked at it with a raised eyebrow. “I thought I was your employee.”

“You’re both.” She heard a click and then the sound of tires on pavement. He’d apparently switched to hands-free. “Hey, listen, things are a little crazy here right now. Can I call you back later? Angie’s dad is in the hospital, she dropped of Amelia at my parents, and I’m on my way to pick up my sister from some party.”

“Wow. That’s a lot. When it rains it pours, right?”

“I think you know that as well as I do.”

She took another bite of the apple, wondering why she hadn’t tried this healthy eating thing earlier. “Good luck. No rush on the call back.”

“Thanks.” There was a brief pause, filled only by the sound of Ben’s driving. “Hey, Judi?”

“Yes, Mr. Oliver, sir?”

Ben groaned. “Don’t call me that. Ever. But hey, I’m proud of you, for whatever that’s worth. You’re doing the right thing and I’ll be there with you every step of the way.”

She swallowed hard, letting out a shaky breath. “Thanks, Ben. I really appreciate that.” Now, though, she’d have to tell him everything about that night — and her past life. The bravery she’d had a few moments before shrunk back at the thought.

Chapter 30

Maggie was waiting in front of an out of the way farmhouse, arms hugged around her middle. He could hear the bass from inside the house, pounding out what must be an ear-splitting rhythm of rock music inside.

Maggie flung the passenger side door open, slid inside and scrunched down in the seat as she pulled the hood of her sweatshirt down over her head. The bottom of her face, featuring a deep frown, was all Ben could see at this point.

He cleared his throat and clicked his tongue, hands on the steering wheel. “So, um, yeah. I guess this wasn’t just a study session after all. I’m also guessing this isn’t Jenny’s house.”

“Can we just go now? I don’t want anyone to see me out here.”

Ben shifted the car into gear, keeping his eyes on the road ahead of him until they had moved off a dirt road onto a paved one.

“You going to tell me what happened or —?”

“It was a party. I didn’t want to go but Jenny talked me into it and there were a bunch of older kids there and they were drinking. That’s all. Okay?”

He clenched his jaw, trying his best to stay calm and not react the way he wanted to, the way the old Ben would have. He’d stay quiet and let her talk. He wasn’t an actual parent, at least in experience, but that’s how their dad had often handled situations with him.

“Okay,” he said finally when she didn’t offer any other explanation.

“Is that all you have to say? Okay? I mean aren’t you going to yell at me or something?”

“Do I have a reason to yell at you?”

Maggie scoffed. “Well, yeah. I was at a party with alcohol and older boys when I was supposed to be studying.”

He glanced at her as he pressed his foot on the brake at a stop sign. “I’m not your parent, Maggie. I’m your brother.” He tipped his neck, pressing a hand to the back of it and cracking it. “But if I was your parent, I would ask you if you were drinking.”

He saw her make a face out of the corner of his eye. “Ugh. No. Beer is gross. It even smells gross. Plus, people who drink act stupid and are losers who ruin their lives.”

An uncomfortable silence settled over the car. She straightened, pushed the hood off her head and looked at him with wide eyes. “I mean some people are. Not everyone. Some people just mess up and get better.”

She averted her gaze quickly and slid down in the seat again. “Sorry. I didn’t mean you.”

His chest tightened and he kept his eyes forward. “No. It’s fine. It’s true. I am a loser, and I did ruin a lot of lives.”

“You’re not a loser, Ben.” Maggie chewed on the finger nail on her thumb. “You were one but you’re not anymore.”

A laugh rumbled from his chest. “Very accurate.”

A sudden thought struck him, and his blood ran cold. “Hey, no one — uh — I mean some guy didn’t —“

She snorted a huff of air through her nose. “Oh my gosh, Ben, no. Guys don’t pay attention to me. I’m a geek.”

She sounded disappointed that guys didn’t pay attention to her but Ben was a bit relieved under the circumstances. “This time that’s a good thing.”

“Nothing like that was going on anyhow. Other than Rocky Westerfield making out with Penny Sanderson on the couch at one point. Otherwise they were all just acting stupid and laughing at the dumbest things. I mean alcohol really does change people. Billy Jenkins is one of the smartest guys in school but by the time we got there he’d had two beers and was laughing at fart jokes.”

Ben tried not to laugh. Most teenage boys could manage to act stupid even without alcohol.

He felt her gaze on him again. “Is that what you acted like when you were drunk? Did you do and say stupid things?”

He tightened his grip on the steering wheel. He really didn’t want to talk to his sister about this.

“Sometimes, yeah.” He hunched his shoulders in a brief shrug. “Most is the time I was a depressed drunk, though. Depressed and angry.”

“Is that why Angie left you?”

“I left her actually, but she should have left me long before that.”

“You left her when she was pregnant, didn’t you?”

He wanted to pull over and throw up. “Yeah. I did.”

“Didn’t you want to be a dad?”

His throat thickened with emotion, and he cleared his throat. “I was too stupid, selfish and arrogant to want anything other than my career, kid. I didn’t feel qualified to be a dad. I didn’t even know how to be a man, let alone a dad. I was afraid, but instead I acted angry. You’re going to learn that about men as you grow up. Sometimes they act angry when all they are is scared. That was me. Afraid I’d fail, that I’d never be as good of a dad as our dad has been, that I’d never be able to stop relying on the alcohol to get me through the tough days. I walked away from Angie and I’ve regretted it ever since.”

Maggie reached over and laid her hand on his arm. “Have you ever told her that? How much you regret walking away?”

He glanced at her again, grateful for her tenderness, but then realizing — “Hey, wait a minute. You changed the subject. This isn’t about me, right now. You need to tell me what you were doing at a drinking party when you were supposed to be studying.”

She dropped her hand and scowled. “I thought you said you weren’t my parent.”

“Yeah, I’m not, but I’m your older brother. Spit it out.”

She folded her arms across her chest and stared at her feet. “Jenny wanted to go see Phil Tanner —”

“Another Tanner?”

“Yeah, he’s Brad’s little brother. He’s the youngest of like four or whatever.”

“Oh.”

“Anyhow, Jenny wanted to see Phil because he texted her to come over so we went over —”

“When you shouldn’t have gone anywhere else without telling Mom and Dad.”

“Do you want me to finish this story or not?”

“Go on.”

“So, we got over there, and they’d already been drinking. I told Jenny I wanted to leave but she’s all lovestruck, so she didn’t want to leave, but then they started acting stupider and Jenny even took a sip of a beer. I just wanted to get out of there.”

Ben turned into the driveway, pausing at the gate, and punching the code in. “You did the right thing, kid. I’m proud of you. People in movies and music videos make drinking look like fun, but it can be really dangerous. It’s not all fun and games.”

Maggie sighed and he didn’t see it but he was sure she rolled her eyes too. “Yeah, I know.” They drove slowly up the drive and as he parked, she turned toward him. “Why did you drink?”

Ben turned the car off and laid an arm across the back of her seat, tilting his head to one side. “Well, you really are inquisitive today.” He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger. “I drank so I couldn’t remember what a failure I felt like. Then I felt more like a failure so I drank more and it was just a vicious cycle.”

“But you weren’t a failure. You were in law school and had a great girlfriend and wonderful family.”

The sun had set now, sending a streak of purple and pink across the horizon. Ben wondered how his parents and Amelia were getting along inside.

“I felt like a failure in other ways like in being a good person and in being respected and as successful as dad and grandpa and Uncle Larry. I did stuff in high school I wasn’t proud of. The shame just kept building up.”

Maggie pulled her lower lip between her teeth for a few seconds, as if in thought. “The other day Pastor Rick said that Jesus forgives our sins and covers our shame with his grace and mercy. Doesn’t that mean He did that for you too?”

A smile tugged at the corners of Ben’s mouth. “Yeah. It does. I just need to keep reminding myself of that.” He dropped his arm down around her shoulder and pulled her in for a hug. “Thanks, Maggie. I appreciate that.” He pulled back to look down at her. “And I’m sorry I wasn’t the big brother you could look up to.”

She opened the passenger side door and winked over her shoulder, “I’ll always look up to you, Binkie. You’re doing your best to make up for your mistakes. That’s something worth admiring. Plus, you’re still a few inches taller than me.”

He tapped her shoulder. “Hey, before you go in — We have a special visitor.”

Her eyebrow quirked questioningly. “Who?”

“Someone you’ve been wanting to meet.” Her brow dipped for a moment then rose again as her eyes widened. “Really? She’s in the house?! Come on, slow poke! Let’s get in there so I can meet my niece!”

Randomly Thinking: Children who think they are funny, annoying pets, and other random thoughts

Here are a few random thoughts from my life from the last month or so.

Things have been randomly weird lately. Some of it has been randomly good and some randomly bad. I think I’ll focus on the randomly good since we all need a bit of an uplift these days. If not all, then some, shall we say. Ha!

Anyhooo….Little Miss and I have been doing different things for school this year in addition to our “book learning” and part of that the last couple of weeks is me reading a child-level biography of George Washington Carver to her.

When the weather was nicer, I allowed her to jump on the trampoline while I read to her. This worked somewhat well, but she kept getting distracted by bugs and falling leaves and our pets wanting to join her. I had a bad feeling she wasn’t learning anything, so I finally decided to quiz her.

“Which college did George Washington Carver go to before he went to Iowa State?”

Jump. Jump.

“The Simpsons!!” she sang, referring to the theme song of the animated show I’ve actually never let her watch.

To anyone else, this might prove she wasn’t listening at all, but in fact, this was her cute way of telling me the answer was “Simpson College.”

And she was right.

***

A couple weeks ago, The Husband noticed his avatar on the Disney Plus app had been changed.

“Why am I Thor?” he asked Little Miss, who had changed it.

I’m sure he was hoping she’d say because he’s big and strong.

Instead, she said, “Because you’re brave and over confident.”

Oops.

***

Am I the only one who climbs over or places myself in the oddest positions in bed at night just so I don’t disturb a pet, specifically a cat? I mean, why do we do that? Why do we risk bladder damage instead of throwing a cat off our lap when cats could care less about our comfort. Our youngest cat walks on my chest in the wee hours of the morning, turns herself around a couple of times like she’s a dog and then proceeds to lay herself so her butt is in my face, her tail draped over my head. Yet I make sure not toa move her or disturb her when she’s sleeping. I protect her sleep while she interrupts mine. It’s absolutely ridiculous.

***

Speaking of the annoying aspects of having pets, our daughter has been asking if we can get another kitten or a puppy.

After the many nights of searching outside for the kitten, stressing out and imagining her dead somewhere, I can’t imagine having another creature to worry about. I reminded Little Miss of this again last week after I drove around the neighborhood looking for a squashed cat in the road because it was 10:30 at night and Scout still wasn’t in the house.

When that little annoying furball did waltz up, looking a bit confused why I had been stressed, I, once again, told Little Miss we are not getting any more pets.

***

The Boy’s birthday is next week. Little Miss asked if we got his gift yet. The Boy said he didn’t want a gift. Little Miss said he really didn’t need one anyhow.

“Mom gave you the best gift ever! She gave you the gift of life!”

***

The Boy was talking about some negative aspects of history one night while we were all downstairs. Little Miss said she didn’t want to hear any more depressing parts about history or about people being mean to each other.

“I’m just going to imagine that everyone lived in peace so shut up and let me have my fantasy that everyone gets along.”

I couldn’t help but agree with her.

***

I saw this on Facebook last night:

This was my title: What Was She Thinking? Ten Tips For What Not To Do In Life.

***

My challenge for you today is to shut down your social media and turn off the news, put this on, and read a book:


 Let’s all do a No News November. Do you think we can do it? Or at least an Almost No News November!

Those are my random thoughts. How about you? what random thoughts have you been having?

Looking back at October and Ahead to November

It’s hard for me to believe that we are almost to the end of 2022. Here we are in November already! It’s crazy to me. This year has flown by for me.

October was a fairly busy month for us with a lot of errands and activities. Little Miss also turned eight in October.

Many of those activities during the month tried to or did interrupt school days and we had to make up our lessons on other days. I am not sure what November will bring but hopefully, there won’t be as many activities during the week. We did start to get into the homeschooling groove in October though I always feel like I am not doing enough. Little Miss and I are plowing through her Reading book, which is actually a book we are finishing from last year. We are winding up our first-grade math so we can jump into second-grade math. She is a second grader this year and the curriculum we are using doesn’t actually say which grade it is for, but I think it is still first-grade math. We’ve started skipping some lessons because Little Miss already knows it and it’s become repetitive for her.

The Boy and I are reading a classic, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn and he says it is boring but he says that about everything so he’ll just have to suffer through.

The days and nights became a bit cooler with a couple nights of frost. The leaves fell off the trees faster than I would have liked but first, it was only around our house. There were still a lot of leaves on the hills in other areas the county next to us. T

Then this past Sunday I noticed that the hills around my parents’ house were completely bare and brown looking. This, of course, usually means that winter will be here soon, which I am not looking forward to much this year for a variety of reasons. Sometimes life seems dark and gloomy on its own. It doesn’t need the weather to add to it.

I do like that winter means slower days where we don’t often have to rush off to an activity or I don’t feel as guilty if I don’t get the kids outside into the sunshine.

Little Miss spent many of her days jumping on the neighbor’s trampoline, which we are really going to miss this winter. It’s brought us a lot of fun.

We took a couple of mini-hikes of excursions involving nature during the month of October as well.

Erin from Still Life, With Cracker Crumbs and I finished up our Spooky Season Cinema Monday and are looking forward to a Christmas Season Cinema (not sure that will be the official name or not) starting the week before Thanksgiving.

For reading in October, I finished a couple of books, including two with Little Miss (Paddington At Work and The Year of Miss Agnes).

For me, I read: The Do Over by Sharon M. Peterson, The Uncertainty of Fire by Stephanie Daniels, A Quilters Holiday by Jennifer Chiaverini, and started a couple I didn’t finish, one of which I may never finish at this point.

For November I hope to do a No News November or an Almost No News November by reducing my news intake since most of the national news isn’t news anymore anyhow, but political propaganda.

We have three birthdays to celebrate, my son’s, my aunt’s and my husband’s and of course Thanksgiving. Other than those celebrations, I don’t have anything super exciting planned for November. I will be editing Shores of Mercy to get it ready to release on January 31 and will also be working on another book for National Novel Writing Month, thought I don’t plan to finish that book.

So how was your October and what are your plans for November? Anything exciting? Let me know in the comments. I love catching up with you all.

Book review/Recommendation: Penelope Grace And The Winter Carousel

Book: Penelope Grace and The Winter Carousel

Author: Alexandria Miracola

Release Date: November 15th, 2022

Genre: Young Adult Fantasy

Description:

In a home nestled on a quiet, cobblestone street, a young woman is holding tightly to wonder.

Penelope Grace is looking out the window, breathing in the stillness of snow falling. Christmas is coming, and as she lovingly places each candle on the windowsills, warmth and light transform her family’s home. All is quiet and good, as it should be.

But as the holiday approaches, Penelope learns how easily circumstance can mock joy. A nameless shadow is haunting her family, and there seems to be no hope of defending them against his relentless attacks.

Still, Penelope Grace is not content to stand by and do nothing, and so, on a cold winter’s night, she finds herself chasing an unexpected friend through the softly falling snow.

But which will prove stronger?

Shadow or Light? Despair or wonder?

Follow her now through an ice-laden forest, down a worn, frozen path, to a winter carousel covered in snow, and we’ll join the battle for wonder together.

My review:

Penelope Grace and The Winter Carousel is a book full of adventure, excitement and intrigue, interwoven with the message of faith that cannot be eclipsed by the darkness.

This book is a lesson in wonder, spiritual warfare, and lessons learned in our darkest moments. Magical, mystical creatures bring a delightful feel to the story and carry the reader into a world of imagination and fantasy, yet also palpable reality.

Written in the style of a fairytale, reminiscent of The Chronicles of Narnia, this book keeps your mind and heart captive as you read, refusing to let go until you know that light wins over darkness, hope over despair, and love over hate.

Penelope Grace is who we all hope to be — a child of God filled with wonder that takes us over and helps overcome our fear and trepidation and leads us to a land of freedom, beauty and glory where fear can never come again.

Miracola is a master at capturing the imagination of all ages of readers. I can’t wait to see what comes next from her.

Excerpt:

Penelope Grace was a remarkable girl.

Of course, that word – remarkable – can mean many different things, depending on whom you ask.

Upon entering the Saris household, you would first be taken to the kitchen for a warm cup of tea to fight off the early winter’s chill. There, Nurse Sasha – who oversaw everything – would happily offer you her opinion. She could hardly find it less than remarkable that a girl of sixteen could behave so like her nine-year-old brother as to be nearly indistinguishable.

Once welcomed and enlightened, you might continue to the living room and find a comfortable chair near Penelope’s mother, Mary, who is patiently mending the latest torn and dirt-stained dress. She would share with you how her daughter is remarkably and admirably unconcerned with what others think of her.

Over the years, her friends marveled to find that Penelope was just as likely to pick up an imaginary sword as an intricate piece of embroidery. Growing serious now, Mary would tell you of the many encouragements she has received to rein her daughter in.

But it is too rare a gift to see a child’s spirit endure into adulthood. As Penelope’s mother, she would ask, how could she do less than safeguard it?

But just then, young George would come bursting in, his great-uncle Alex not far behind, and insist on knowing what your conversation was about.

“Well, George,” Mary would ask with the warmest of smiles, “what do you think makes your sister remarkable?”

He would think hard about it for a minute or two but, his nose crinkling up as he grinned, would soon reply with a firm, “Two things.”

And then, leaning forward as if to share with you a very great secret, George would tell you a story. Just last week, Penelope had, remarkably, succeeded both in assembling an entire regiment of nutcracker soldiers in the foyer and in vanishing from sight before Nurse Sasha could certainly accuse her of having done it.

“And the second,” you would ask, sincerely eager to know.

“She is the only grown-up who isn’t only teasing me when she says she still believes in Father Christmas.”

Equally impressed by both these reasons, you might then turn to great-uncle Alex, whom you would find no less willing to join in the conversation.

He would have to say that Penelope was remarkable for her persistent delight in all things simple, yet extraordinary. Even now she remains as enchanted with his magic tricks as she was on the day he first arrived from Greece to share them with her.

But of all her family, acquaintances and friends, only her father, John – who has been listening by the crackling fire all the while – could tell you with absolute certainty what it was that made Penelope Grace genuinely remarkable:

“Wonder.”

You can order copies of the book here: https://form.jotform.com/221315389368159

Spooky Season Cinema: Sleepy Hollow

When my husband and I were dating, he invited me to a movie that he had already seen. He admitted later he didn’t mind that the movie might scare me, and I might jump and have to be held by him. The movie was Sleepy Hollow. The main actor was Johnny Depp. The year was 1999. And I haven’t seen the movie since — until last week when The Boy and I watched it again for Spooky Season Cinema, a feature I did this fall with Erin from Still Life, With Cracker Crumbs. This is probably why I kept saying, “I don’t remember any of this movie.” The Boy was quite concerned about my brain and why I couldn’t remember, at first, so many of the gory scenes. I have to say it’s probably because I blocked it all from my brain since it scared me so much. Ha! Who knows.

“Or,” I told my son with a mischievous grin. “I was too busy admiring your dad.”

He just rolled his eyes and didn’t comment.

In all reality, I am quite certain that I was watching it through  my fingers and wishing for it to be over, sort of like this time around, and not because it is bad but because it’s just so creepy. *wink*

Anyhow, for those who aren’t familiar, this is a movie based on the story by Washington Irving, but since it’s directed by Tim Burton, there are a lot of licenses taken. It’s very dark visually and otherwise.

Johnny Depp’s acting in the movie is odd, but that’s always how he acts.

American actor Johnny Depp on the set of Sleepy Hollow, based on the story by Washington Irving and directed by Tim Burton. (Photo by Paramount Pictures/Sunset Boulevard/Corbis via Getty Images)

In 1999, Robert Ebert wrote of the movie: “This is the best-looking horror film since Coppola’s “Bram Stoker’s Dracula.” It is not, however, titled “Washington Irving’s Sleepy Hollow,” perhaps because the story has been altered out of all recognition from the Irving classic. Perhaps not. No power on earth could persuade me to reread the original and find out. What it depends upon is Burton’s gift for bizarre and eccentric special effects, and a superb performance by Johnny Depp, who discards everything we may ever have learned or thought about Ichabod Crane and starts from scratch.”

This isn’t a movie I would watch over and over, or probably again (for another 23 years) only because it was so dark (to me, but not necessarily to others who enjoy these types of movies), but I might would watch it for the acting, which is very good (Johnny is awkward, but I guess that’s how he’s supposed to be for this character). The imagery is also very dynamic.

So this is the end of our Spooky Season Cinema since Erin and I both agreed we are ready for some less scary and spooky movies as we get ready for the Thanksgiving and Christmas season. We are working out the details for which movies and specials we will watch for our combined feature, which we plan to start writing about the week of Thanksgiving. If you want to read about the past movies we watched for this feature, you can search over to the right for “Spooky Season Cinema.” Thank you to Erin for designing the graphic for this feature and for helping to organize and choose many of the movies. I had a lot of fun experiencing these movies and sharing that experience with Erin.

You can read her impression of Sleepy Hollow on her blog.

Sunday Bookends: Radio shows and stations, fun books and classics, and cooking shows

It’s time for our Sunday morning chat. On Sundays I ramble about what’s been going on, what I and the rest of the family have been reading and watching, what I’ve been writing, and some weeks I share what I am listening to.

What’s Been Occurring

Each evening I look around our living room and count heads. Not the heads of children, but pets. I make sure that both our cats and our puppy are inside, safe and sound.

It makes me smile when I look around and they are all there, usually curled up in a dog bed (that’s often our old cat) or a recliner (taking up space where we could sit).

This week I have been trying to remind myself that I get to have this life, especially when I have to do something I don’t really want to do — like drive Little Miss to gymnastics or walk her to the trampoline up the hill, or go get groceries. There is a lot about my life I am blessed to be able to do. I’m blessed, after last year, to still be here.

Our local Christian radio station has had a family hour from 7 to 8 p.m. on weekdays for more than 20-years. They play Adventures in Odyssey and follow it with Down Gilead Lane, Lamplighter Theater,  The Pond, or Animal Jam. These are all children’s Christian radio dramas produced by Focus on the Family.

Little Miss and I started listening to the last half hour on the way home from Awana a month ago but I would forget to turn it on the radio at home. I finally put a reminder on my phone to turn the radio on so Friday night Little Miss was so excited and ran around the house as I turned it on, shutting off all the lights to make it “more like a long,  boring car ride.”

We huddled under my huge, fuzzy blanket and listened to the stories, imagining what was happening, which was nicer than her playing video games or watching cartoons that are full of subjects I am not too sure about.

This radio station has been a real blessing to our family, especially me this week when I had to drive on a road I am not comfortable driving in the daylight, let alone at night, three times in one night. I turned the station on and listened to encouraging Christian music all the way to take Little Miss to gymnastics, then back, then back to the same place to pick up my husband (who was waiting for someone to unlock our van, but that person never came). I’ve heard people say that turning on this radio station is liking reconnecting with a long lost friend and they are right. Much like God never changes, this station has been there for almost my entire life when I’ve needed it the most. If you are ever in the area, it is Family Life out of Bath, N.Y. and they have transmitters throughout Upstate New York and northern Pennsylvania.

They also offer music streams on their webpage (https://www.familylife.org/).

Temperatures have been dropping very fast at night but we have been dragging our feet on turning the heat on because of how high the oil prices are. When it hit 28 one night this week, I decided we are going to have to break down and turn it on.

What We’ve Been Reading

This week I am finishing up Dog Days of Summer by Kathleen Y’Barbo, which I am enjoying so far.

Here is a description:

Mishaps Abound as Second Chance Ranch Struggles to Get Its Start
 
Grab a lap dog to cuddle and relax into a fun small-town mystery as a new dog rescue project turns into a three-ring circus of calamities in book 2 of the Gone to the Dogs series.
 
Trina Potter, Nashville country music star, buys a ranch near her hometown in Brenham, Texas, to help her niece open a rescue facility for dogs. Her presence in town stirs up some old high school rivalries—and romance. Finding property to buy is a challenge, convincing her mother to move there with her is daunting, and navigating a string of strange accidents is perplexing. Sometimes Trina feels like she’s purchased her own three ring circus instead of a beautiful piece of land. But her first priority will be figuring out who wants Second Chance Ranch shut down before they even have the grand opening.

More in the Gone to the Dogs Series:
Book 1 – Off the Chain by Janice Thompson
Book 2 – Dog Days of Summer by Kathleen Y’Barbo
Book 3 – Barking Up the Wrong Tree by Janice Thompson

I am also reading The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn because The Boy is also reading it for English LIT.

After Dog Days of Summer I hope to dive into (in no particular order):

The Father Brown Mysteries by G.K. Chesterton;

Criss Cross by C.C.  Warrens;

Magpie Murders by Anthony Horowitz;

Miss Julia Knows A Thing or Two by Ann B. Ross

At night I am reading The Light, The Witch, and The Wardrobe with Little Miss. I haven’t read this book all the way through since I was a kid so I am excited to read it with her.

The Husband hasn’t — gasped — started a new book yet.

What I’ve Been Listening To

There are so many Christian musicians with new albums out including:

Cody Carnes,

Steven Curtis Chapman

Anne Wilson

and

Mercy Me

I’ll be listening to a lot of new music this week.

What We’ve Been Watching/Watched

Little Miss and  both enjoy cooking or baking shows so she asked for the Great British Baking Show, but it wasn’t showing up on the streaming services we have so we opted for Mary Berry’s show called Classic Mary Berry.

Little Miss was absolutely delighted when it started and said, “I love these shows!”

The one downside was the commercials. But we had fun watching Mary whip up a variety of dishes. I’ve never had a poached egg, have you? And if I haven’t eaten one, then I’ve never cooked one. Have you?

I also watched part of the Dove Awards and hope to watch more later:

The Husband and I also watched A New Kind of Love with Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward.

What I’m Writing

I am finishing up Shores of Mercy and excited to start a new book while I let the book set for a couple of weeks and then start editing and rewrites. The book is up for pre-order on Amazon HERE (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BK5CQDVZ)

This week on the blog I shared:

Special Fiction Saturday: Mercy’s Shore Chapter 28Fiction Friday: Mercy’s Shore Chapter 27Book review/recommendation: The Do Over by Sharon M. PetersonHodge Podge: A Little Spooky. A Little Fun.Let me pour you a cup of tea and we can chat

Now it is your turn. What are you reading, watching, listening to, or doing? Let me know in the comments.

Special Fiction Saturday: Mercy’s Shore Chapter 28

As always, this is a continuing/serial story. I share a chapter a week and at the end of the story, after I edit and rewrite it, I self-publish it. To catch up with the story click HERE. To read the rest of the books in this series click HERE.

Let me know in the comments what you think. Or don’t. That’s okay too. *wink*

If you would prefer to read the book when it is all complete, you can pre-order a copy HERE on Amazon. It releases January 31, 2023.

Chapter 28

He’d needed church that morning. He’d needed the music, the sermon, the smiles and greetings of the other members of the congregation.

It had soothed an aching soul.

Now Ben was at his parents’ house, sitting on the back deck with a glass of lemonade and a novel, looking out over the autumn foliage splashing brilliant reds, oranges and yellows across the Pennsylvania hills around him. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d actually sat down and read a book. He only wished he could focus on it better.

Memories of the visit to the Phillipi’s kept playing in his mind. Then there was Judi. Why wasn’t she answering his texts or calls? Maybe she’d fallen off the wagon and was sleeping it off. He hated to see her go down that path again. Plus, he needed her to be alert tomorrow at work.

She’d already been let go from one job. He didn’t want to have to let her go from this one. In fact, he’d like to offer her more hours at some point and maybe even split hours between her and Cindy when, or if, Cindy decided to come back to work.

“Gorgeous view, isn’t it?”

His dad’s voice came from behind him, pulling him from his thoughts.

“Yeah, it definitely is.”

Max sat on the chair next to him with his own glass of lemonade. He sipped from it for a few minutes, gaze focused on the hillside. “So, kid, there’s been a lot of pressure on you lately. You doing okay?”

Ben shrugged a shoulder. “Yeah. I’m hanging in there.”

“I saw Adam the other day. Everyone is back in the area he said. Including Angie and Amelia.”

Ben cleared his throat. “Yes, they are. I’ve talked to Angie about you and mom seeing Amelia actually. She’s thinking about it.” Or she had been. He wasn’t so sure now.

Max looked at him with a smile. “That would be great. I’m fine with leaving it up to Angie, though. I’m sure it’s awkward for her.”

“It shouldn’t be though. You and Mom weren’t the ones who hurt her. I was. You shouldn’t be punished for my mistakes.”

His dad drank some more of the lemonade before talking. “We’re guilty by association, I suppose. Listen, Ben. Really, are you doing okay?”

Ben laughed softly. “I guess you mean do I feel the need to cope with a glass of gin?” He shook his head once. “Nope. Not yet anyhow.” He winked. “I did have an extra dessert for dinner last night, though.”

Max lifted his glass in a mock toast. “Glad to hear it, kid. Not that extra sugar is good for us, but better than too much alcohol.”

Ben laughed. “Agreed.”

“You know I’m here if you ever need to talk, right?”

The smile faded. “Yeah, Dad, I do.”

Max leaned back in his chair and sat his glass on the small table between them. “Ben, maybe this isn’t the best time to bring this up but – did I do something over the years that led you down that path toward — well, toward —”

Ben laughed softly and winked. “Alcoholism, Dad. It’s called alcoholism. It’s okay to say it. It’s what it was. I was an alcoholic and now I’m a recovering one.”

Ben had never seen his dad look so — what was the right word? Uncertain? Hesitant? Clearly lacking confidence?

“What could you have done to push me down that path? You’re the best dad any kid could have. You’re hardworking, accomplished, well-respected in the community, beloved by your family, a good Christian man —”

Maxwell winced, hands in his pockets. “Ouch. All those things sound good but they also make me sound perfect. I’m not perfect.” He turned his head to look at Ben. “You know that, right? I mean,  you don’t actually think that I’m perfect, right? Because I know I’m not. I hope it doesn’t come across that way.”

“You don’t act that way at all dad.” He swallowed hard. How honest should he be with the man? Would it make him feel better or worse? “I’ve tried to live up to your reputation over the years, it’s true. I tried too hard for a long time, focusing only on your career accomplishments. When I couldn’t get there, I’ll admit, I fell apart a little.” He laughed softly and shook his head. “No. A lot. I fell apart a lot. I screwed up my life by trying to drink myself into oblivion and forget the fact I’d never be as accomplished or as good as you. The more I drank, the worse it got too. I got further and further away from who you were, knowing with each passing day I could never measure up to your standards or God’s.”

Max reached out and squeezed his shoulder. “You know now that you don’t have to live up to anything for my love or God’s, right?”

Ben nodded and covered his dad’s hand with his. “Yes. I do.” He may not feel it every day, but he understood it.

The ringing of his cellphone startled him. He’d forgotten he’d even brought it outside with him. The ringing was coming from his jacket. He searched for the phone and lifted it out of the inside pocket, hoping it was Judi letting him know she was okay.

He didn’t recognize the number, but answered it in case it was a client. “Hello, Ben Oliver here.”

There was an intake of a breath and a pause on the other end, then, “Hey, it’s Angie.”

He shifted in the chair, sitting up straighter, muscles tensing as he braced himself for the scolding, the demand that he not visit again.

“Hey, what’s up?”

She cleared her throat. “I need a favor.”

He half expected her favor to be for him to meet her brothers down at the boat launch outside of town so they could beat him up and throw him in the river.

“Yeah, sure.”

“My dad’s at the hospital and mom’s already there with grandma. My brothers are two hours away on a job and I don’t really know anyone else around here anymore. I can’t believe I’m asking this, but can you come sit with Amelia?”

His mouth went dry. “Definitely. Yeah. I mean, I’m at my parents so it will take a bit but —”

“I can bring her there. We’re downtown grabbing her some lunch from the diner.”

“Yeah, you can do that, if you want.”

“See you in fifteen?”

“Absolutely.”

She disconnected and he realized he hadn’t even asked why Adam was at the hospital.

“Everything okay?” His dad’s voice cut into his thoughts.

He shook his head. “No. Adam’s in the hospital. Angie wants to drop Amelia off here while she heads up.”

“You’ve gone pale, kid. You going to be okay?”

“What?” Ben looked at his dad, palms suddenly damp, mouth dry. “No. I’m fine. I’m not pale. Am I?”

Max laughed and stood, patting Ben on the shoulder. “It’s going to be fine, buddy. Your mom and I will be here for back up.”

Ben stood and followed his dad into the house. “I know, but Angie hates me, Dad. I mean, the other day I was pushing Amelia on the swing after I helped Adam and her brothers bring the furniture in and she fell off. Angie acted liked I did it on purpose. And what’s worse is I had no idea how to comfort Amelia or even check her for injuries.” He downed the rest of the lemonade and placed the glass in the sink. “This kid is my flesh and blood and when I’m around her I have no idea what to do. I feel like she’s someone else’s kid. I don’t know anything about her at all, but for some reason she attaches herself every time I come over.”

“It’s because something in her knows you’re dad,” his mom said sweeping into the dining room, setting a vase of flowers in the middle of the table.

She was still wearing her Sunday clothes — a flowered skirt and white, button-up blouse — her hair swept up on her head in a stylish bun, hiding much of the gray streaks in the brown nicely.

Sitting at the dining room table, Ben clasped his hand behind his head and yawned. “She’s four. That’s not possible.”

Sylvia paused in her adjustment of the flowers in the vase and raised an eyebrow. “Kids are smarter than we adults give them credit for, Benjamin. Now, what brought this topic up?”

 “I don’t want you to get flustered, but Angie’s bringing Amelia over for a while. Adam’s in the hospital for some reason and Angie’s going to wait with Leona.”

Sylvia’s hands hovered over the flowers. “Really? She’s bringing our granddaughter here?” Her eyes glistened as she pressed one hand to the base of her throat and the other to her mouth. “Oh my. Oh, that’s —” she sniffed. “That’s just so wonderful.” She spun quickly toward the kitchen. “I wonder if I even have any snacks she’d like. I haven’t had a young child in the house in years. I do have some peanut butter and cheerios and I can pour her a glass of milk. Unless she’s lactose intolerant. You were at that age, you know. Maybe I should find some paper and markers too, so she can color if she wants and —”

Ben laughed. “Mom. It’s okay. She’ll be fine with whatever you have.”

Syliva took a deep breath. “Right. Of course, she will. I just — it’s just — this is the first time I’m going to meet her in person and I —” She looked at Max. “I mean what if we scare her? She doesn’t even know us.”

Ben stood and kissed his mom on the cheek. “It will be fine, Mom. She’s going to love you.” He looked toward the direction of the stairs. “Is Maggie back yet? I know she wanted to meet her.”

“No,” Max said. “She called earlier and said she’s going to be at Jenny’s until this evening.”

Ben walked to the front window, petting Maggie’s longhaired cat Muffins, watching for Angie. The cat nuzzled his hand when he dropped it and he started petting it again absentmindedly , his thoughts racing, wondering what Angie’s demeanor would be when she arrived. He heard the buzz of the gate and Angie’s voice over the intercom in the kitchen.

“Hey, Angie.” Max’s voice was warm, welcoming. “Come on up.”

Her voice held the tension of the almost five-year estrangement. “Thank you, Max.”

As the small maroon Toyota wove its way up the driveway, he realized he didn’t know whether to walk outside or let her walk up to the house herself. As she parked the car and sat still for a few minutes, her hands clutching the steering wheel, he decided it might be better to meet her instead of forcing her to face his parents as well as him.

She looked up as he stepped outside, watching him for a few seconds, then opening the car door and stepping out. A breeze caught her hair, which hung loose down her back, pushing several loose strands into her face. A sudden urge to reach out and push the strands back coursed through him.

He watched her push the strands back herself instead as he walked, the move revealing the curve of her cheek, a face sans its usual make up but beautiful nonetheless.

She pulled her lower lip between her teeth, pulling the blue sweater she was wearing closer around her. “Hey, sorry to have to bother you.”

“It’s not a bother, really.”

She turned toward the back door without responding, but when he touched her shoulder, she paused and looked back at him with a questioning raise of her eyebrow.

“Who do I tell her my parents are?”

Angie shrugged her shoulder. “Tell her the truth. They’re your parents.”

“Then who do I tell her I am?”

An amused smile tipped her mouth up. “She already calls you ‘Ben, that fun guy’ she met at the old house. Just go with that.”

“Yeah, okay.” He nodded a couple of times, his mouth dry as he watched Angie opened the back door. “That should work.”

Amelia bounded out of the car as soon as her mom unhooked her seatbelt and ran to Ben, a piece of paper clutched in one hand, her other arm wrapped around a teddy bear. A small, pink backpack was strapped to her back and her bright blue eyes sparkled in the late day sunlight.

“Hi, Ben!” She thrust the piece of paper at him. “I made this picture for you.”

Hearing his name fly out of her mouth with such ease made his stomach flip, even as a twinge of regret twisted in his chest. All she knew him as was a man named Ben, when in reality he was so much more. Technically anyhow.

He looked down at the drawing on the paper — stick figures of a man and a woman standing next to a smaller stick figure and a crudely drawn tree with what he thought might be a swing hanging off a branch.

 “See?” Her little index finger directed his gaze. “That’s you and that’s mommy and that’s me on the swing, but this time I’m not falling off.”

Ben chuckled. “Ha, yeah, not falling off is a good thing.”

“Can you push me on a swing again?”

“Well, we don’t have a swing here, but I’m sure we can find other things to entertain you.”

Angie lifted a mini suitcase from the backseat and handed it to him, her smile from before fading into a slight frown. “She wanted to bring her favorite teddy bear and doll and all their clothes. I told her it was a bit much, but —”

Ben smiled. “I guess she takes after her mom in that way.”

“Ha. Ha.” Angie scowled but the small smile returned, which sent a shiver of warmth through his chest. “Very funny.”

She turned and slid back into the driver’s seat.

Ben felt Amelia’s fingers encircle his and he looked down and smiled at her, even as an anxious buzz sliding across his skin. He’d never been on his own with her before. The weight of responsibility pressed down on him fast. He looked up as Angie closed the door and slid the window down, then took a step toward the car.

“Angie, I am sorry about the swing thing. It was an —”

“I know, Ben. I do.” The faint smile couldn’t hide how tired — and worried — she looked. “I’ll call later with an update.”

“I’ll be praying.”

A puzzled expression furrowed her brow, dipped her mouth into a frown. “Um, yeah. Thank you. That would be nice.”

As she drove away, he thought about how him offering to pray was probably confusing to her, since when they’d dated he’d done his best to stay away from anything having to do with church, or the faith his parents had raised him in.

A soft tug brought his attention back to the present and he looked down at a small round face with big eyes. “Hey, let’s go inside. I have some people I want you to meet.”

She skipped as he walked and he admired her energy.

His phone rang before he reached the front door and he recognized the song as Maggie’s favorite, which was why he’d set as her identifying ringtone.

“Hey, squirt. You’re not going to believe who —” “Benny, I’m at a party and I’m scared. Can you come get me? ”

Fiction Friday: Mercy’s Shore Chapter 27

As always, this is a continuing/serial story. I share a chapter a week and at the end of the story, after I edit and rewrite it, I self-publish it. To catch up with the story click HERE. To read the rest of the books in this series click HERE.

Let me know in the comments what you think. Or don’t. That’s okay too. *wink*

If you would prefer to read the book when it is all complete, you can pre-order a copy HERE on Amazon. It releases January 31, 2023.

Chapter 27

She’d finally convinced Ellie to go home.

“I had a panic attack, that’s all. It’s not like I’m suicidal.”

Her sister sighed. “I know, but I’d still feel better if you’d let me stay. I can sleep in the spare room and —”

Judi had rolled her eyes. “Go home to Jason. I’m sure he needs you to cook for him or give him a massage or whatever you married people do.”

She really didn’t want to think about what they did as married people.

Ellie had stayed another hour, but eventually she had gone home. That had been two days ago and now Judi was lying on her bed in the darkness, replaying that day’s events and wishing she could sink into a hole and disappear forever. There was no way Evan was ever going to talk to her again and she couldn’t blame him. Who wanted to be around a woman who had a complete breakdown during a make-out session? She pressed the heels of her palms against her eyes.

Seriously. She was such a loser.

Thankfully she’d recovered from the panic attack and had been able to go to work with Ben the next day. Thankfully he didn’t ask her how she was doing this time, which she knew was code for, “You don’t feel the need to jump off the wagon and get plastered right?”

She was grateful he hadn’t asked because honestly, she absolutely did want to go out and get plastered, numb herself, silence her racing thoughts and she planned to do just that tonight. Dragging her hands through her hair she snatched the phone from the bedside table and looked at Jessie Landry’s text message again.

Being sober is sooooo boring.  Go to Terrell’s with me for a drink?

Judi texted back an answer as she walked to her closet.

Absolutely. Meet you there in fifteen.

But when she reached the bar and stood outside wearing thigh-high black leather boots and a hot pink skirt and rainbow striped tank top she’d purchased at an upscale boutique in the city, she hesitated. She hadn’t been to a bar in almost a year, other than Lonny’s and she’d never stayed there to hang out. Did she really want to go back there again? The alcohol would definitely distract her from everything she didn’t want to think about, but it would also numb her feelings and maybe she needed to feel for once.

“Juuuuudeeeeee!!!”

Jessie’s squeal startled her, made her scrunch her shoulders and wince. She regretted agreeing to this trip, or at least with Jessie.

Jessie looped her arm through Judi’s and giggled. “Come on girl, let’s loosen you up!” She reached for the front door. “How long has it been since we just let loose?! Too long, that’s what I say!”

The door opened and the smell of cigarette smoke, beer, too much perfume, and something frying wafted out, overwhelming Judi’s senses.

Country music from the old-fashioned juke box filled her ears as Judi dragged her over the threshold. She squinted in the dim light and took a deep breath at the sight of mostly men sitting on bar stools and tall, small round tables, their hands around the handle of a beer mug or a bottle. The dark wood walls did nothing to brighten up the place either.

Places like this had been her playing field for years but now she felt out of place. She felt out of place here, she felt out of place at a church or an AA meeting. At this point she didn’t feel like anywhere was her place.

“Come on, let’s find a table.” Jessie was already waving at men, flipping her hair over her shoulder and winking. Judi wondered which man Jessie would go home with tonight.

They chose a table at the far end of the main room. The bar, lined with people sitting on stools and drinking was on the other side of the room.

“So tell me, Jude, what’s been going on with you anyhow?” Jessie propped a cigarette between bright pink lipstick covered lips and lit it. She took a puff then blew a stream of smoke out of the corner of her mouth.

Judi made a face, glad smoking hadn’t become one of her vices. Filling Jessie in on her life wasn’t appealing to her at all. She’d really only come to get out of the house and see if alcohol could drown her feelings like it had in the past.

“Nothing much, honestly. I’ve been working at Lonny’s and now at Ben Oliver’s office and just trying to figure out what I’m going to do with my life.”

Jessie smirked. “Ben Oliver. Now there’s a hottie. Have you slept with him yet?”

Judi cocked an eyebrow. Jessie was even more blunt than she was. “Uh. No. Not interested in him that way. He’s just my boss.”

“Then I’m free to go after him?” Jessie propped the cigarette in the middle of her first and middle finger and leaned her arms across the top of the table, her eyes shadowed by heavy eyelids and long, dark, fake eyelashes.

Judi laughed softly. “Good luck trying. He’s all about work and nothing else.”

Of course, she wasn’t going to tell Jessie that Ben was one, severely uptight and two, absolutely still in love with Angie. Let her figure it out.

Jessie crossed one long leg over another and bounced her foot in a rhythm that matched the country music in the background. “I bet I could get him to think about something else.” She winked as a waitress approached the table.

Jessie ordered a Black Russian and Judi asked for a beer. Might as well start out a little lighter for her first drink in almost a year.

As Jessie relayed story after story about her various sexual escapades, Judi’s gaze drifted around the bar, scanning the customers, recognizing a few, especially the ones she went to school with. Once the drinks she and Jessie had ordered were delivered, her stomach tightened. She turned the bottle around a few times, keeping her hand around it for a few seconds before lifting it.

Ridiculous.

There was nothing wrong with having one drink. She needed this. She needed to feel the numbing comfort of the alcohol and maybe drink enough to give her a buzz, muddy her thoughts until the memory of her embarrassing night with Evan disappeared.

The liquid slid bitterly over her tongue, burned down her throat, and hit her stomach as if she’d drank fire.

 How she’d ever drank this stuff for so long she had no idea. Maybe a whiskey would be better. When the whiskey came, though, it wasn’t any better. In fact, her stomach was burning as much as her throat now.

She slid off the stool. “I’ll be back, Jessie.”

“Take your time.” Jessie’s blue eyes scanned the bar for her next prey. “I’ll keep myself busy until you get back.”

In the bathroom she splashed her face with cold water, patting it dry and trying her best to keep from taking all her makeup off. Foundation hid the dark circles. She’d been proud she’d been able to hide the effect of sleepless nights. She didn’t need anything else to make her look older than she was at this point. Pausing at the sink she leaned on it and stared at her reflection for several seconds.

“Judi, what are you doing?” she whispered to the exhausted woman looking back at her. “Do you want to end up like Jerry one day? Laying in your own blood in an empty field while your family cries over you?”

Did she want to be the girl bar hopping and having one-night stands all her life, with no commitment, no one special to go home to at night? Someone who had no goals in her life, no direction, no real career or hope for a future? Someone like Jessie?

She pulled her hair back tight into a ponytail, then let it down again, shaking it loose across her shoulders. Holding her hand across her stomach she swallowed hard, then stepped aside as the door opened and a woman rushed inside, stumbled into a stall, and vomited in the toilet without even closing the door.

She pressed her hand to her mouth and swallowed back the bile crawling up her throat, turned and rushed from the bathroom. Jessie was already at another table, leaning in front of a good looking man Judi didn’t recognize, laughing loudly and letting him get a good view of her cleavage.

She straightened when she saw Judi and waved her over.

“Judi!” she called. “Come meet Troy and Nate! They need some company tonight.”

Judi inwardly cringed at how loud and bold Jessie was. Had she been that obnoxious when she was still drinking? Good grief. She probably still was that obnoxious.

Maybe she’d become a boring prude, but all she wanted right now was go home, change into her pajamas, crawl under the covers, and drink some hot cocoa while watching a cheesy rom-com. Jessie hooked her arm in Judi’s and pulled her into the booth next to her.

The man across from Judi winked at her as he lifted his beer. “So, you’re Judi.” He took a swig from the bottle. “From around here, little lady?”

Little lady? Was this guy for real?

“Uh, yeah. Born and raised actually.”

Unfortunately, she wanted to add, her gaze drifting from the smirking figure in front of her across the bar, to the exit, wondering how fast she could run there in heels. As her gaze drifted back, she spotted Brad sitting at the far end of the bar, head in his hands, an empty shot glass in front of him. It looked like she wasn’t the only one throwing herself off the sobriety wagon tonight.

“Can I buy you a drink?” The voice of Mr. Blue Eyes pulled her attention from Brad.

“Um, sure.” Her stomach clenched. “A ginger ale would be great.”

The man grinned, his gaze drifting from her face down to her chest, lingering there, and then sliding back up again to her eyes. “I didn’t think you were just the soda type from the way Jessie here talked about you.”

Her stomach turned again. “Well, someone has to be the designated driver,” she said with a sideways glance at Jessie who was finishing off her Black Russian.

“Are you going to apologize to me or not, Tanner?”

A deep voice boomed across the small bar and Judi turned her head in time to see a blur of movement a second before Brad staggered back, fell over a stool and to the floor. Blood trickled from the corner of his mouth, but he didn’t move to wipe it. He simply sat looking up at the man towering over him, mouth forming a thin line, a muscle jumping in his jaw.

In the past, Judi would have grabbed a bowl of peanuts and her drink and sat back for the show. This time, though, something needled at her. Apparently, she’d developed a conscience during her time of sobriety because instead of sitting by she stood and walked quickly toward the impending bar brawl, stepping in front of the taller man towering over Brad.

“Boys, boys.” She held her hands up, palm out, one toward the man and one toward Brad. “No need to fight over me. I’m not interested in either of you.”

She winked at the taller man and then waved her fingers at him as he scowled down at her. “Seriously, though, let’s not ruin this lovely evening by trashing this fine establishment and leaving blood on the floor.” She turned to look at Brad, cocked an eyebrow, and jerked her head to the door. “Come on, dear. Walk me outside. I could use some fresh air.”

Brad’s expression registered confusion as he stood slowly, straightening his shirt and reaching for his ball cap on the bar. Judi looped her arm in his and tugged him toward the front door while the other man looked at them with his arms folded across his chest, eyes flashing. If nothing else, this little charade would at least get her away from the creepy guy back at the table.

Out in the cool air, Judi let go of Brad’s arm after they reached the side of the building and sat on the bench near the parking lot. “Sit down, Bradley and tell dear Judi what brings you to this fine establishment, breaking your AA promises to admit your wrong doings and the power alcohol has over you.”

Brad scowled as he sat next to her, stretching one leg out in front of him and propping his hat on his other knee. “Aren’t you here to do the same thing?”

Judi looked at her nail and noticed a chip in the polish. “I’m here to forget how dull my life is.” She pushed her lower lip out and sighed. “Anyhow, what was all that about back there? Who did you tick off this time?”

Brad shrugged his shoulder, laying an arm across the back of the bench. “I asked his girlfriend if I could buy her a drink. He objected, I guess.” He rubbed his fingers across his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. “What are we doing here, Judi? That accident should have scared us straight, right?”

Judi looked out across the parking lot, at the pickup trucks and the sedans and the cars of people inside numbing their problems the same way she’d tried to. Music from the jukebox thrummed its way through the wall behind her, played a melody she’d heard many times before over words about living like you were dying.

“It should have, yeah, but instead it drove us right back to our poor coping skills.” She looked over at him, his eyes rimmed red, hair disheveled, jaw unshaven. “How drunk are you, Tanner?”

He frowned, shook his head, staring out into the parking lot. “Honestly, I only had one shot glass. I’m not drunk. I couldn’t go through with it. I was getting ready to leave when Billy Bob back there grabbed ahold of me.” He raked a hand through his hair and leaned forward, elbows on his knees. “I don’t want to be that guy I was before anymore. I don’t want to be all fuzzy headed and incoherent, but right now I am only because I haven’t slept in three days.” He looked over at her. “I could have killed Ellie that night, Judi. I don’t even remember half of it, but she said I grabbed for the wheel. I could have straight up killed us both. And for what? Because I just kept drinking away to try to forget all the failures in my life. I’m an idiot and everyone has had to put up with me all of these years.”

Judi laughed softly. “Sounds familiar.” She bumped her shoulder against his. “You’re not alone in that area, you know. I’m right there in that circle with you. I came here to get myself drunk off my butt tonight. I don’t want to think anymore about all the failures in my life, either. We both know that coming here to drink our problems away is just going to add to them.”

She crossed one leg over another and leaned back again, sliding her hands back through her hair.

“Look at Jerry. He could be in a wheelchair the rest of his life. He’s traumatized his wife and kids for years with his drinking and now even more. Dawn probably doesn’t know whether she wants him to live or die after all this. There is a part of her that will want him to live, hopes this was his wake up call and he’ll become the old Jerry again, the Jerry that didn’t drink his life way.”

Brad stood and slid his hands in his jean pockets, kicking at a rock with the tip of his boot. “I hope she gets the old Jerry again. He used to be a pretty good guy. Before he started drinking so much. After he lost his dad and his job.” He slid a pack of cigarettes out of his flannel shirt pocket, tapped one out and popped it in his mouth. The flame that flicked up from the lighter illuminated his face as he lit the cigarette and took a puff. He pinched the cigarette between his thumb and forefinger, then smirked. “I can only handle getting rid of one vice at a time. And since when did you start to sound so smart? That speech about Jerry actually made sense.”

Judi scowled at him playfully. “I have no idea. I guess I’ve been hanging around Ellie and Jason too much lately. I’ve even started to think about going to church with them. Crazy right? That scares me, though. That’s why I came here tonight. I’m afraid to try to be normal. What if I fail and become weird again?”

Brad scoffed. “What’s normal? I mean, Ellie and Jason are good people, but they aren’t perfect. You know that. You are normal. Even I’m normal. We’re our own normal. We mess up more than the other humans we know but everyone has something they struggle to overcome.” He looked up at the sky, blowing a plume of smoke through his nose. “Maybe other people don’t see it that way but I think God does. He created us, let us have a free will he knew we would abuse but still somehow, he loves us.”

Judi’s eyebrows raised. “Brad Tanner. Have you gone all religious on me?”

Brad laughed, tossing the cigarette to the ground and grinding it under his shoe. “Eh, it’s always been in there. I’ve just been running from it, from Him, for a long time.” He made a face. “Also, that cigarette was awful. Maybe I can get rid of another vice.” He shrugged. “Or maybe I need to buy another brand.”

Judi stood and folded her arms across her chest, rubbing her hands across her bare arms and wondering why she hadn’t brought a sweater. “I’ve been running from God for a long time too. Sometimes I don’t even know if he’s there.”

A brief silence fell over them.

“Maybe we both need to start running toward Him for a while,” Brad said softly. “See what happens. See if he’s even there.”

Judi hugged her arms tighter around herself. “Yeah. Maybe.”

Brad pushed his hands back in his front pockets. “Can I give you a lift home?”

She glanced at him. “Uh — no. I drove here, that’s fine.”

“You okay to drive?”

“I barely had anything to drink. Are you?”

“I barely did either. I think we’ll both be fine. Just don’t let good ole’ Officer McGee pull you over.”

A small smile tugged at her mouth. “See you later, Brad.”

He tipped his head in a quick nod. “See you later, Judi.”

Back at her apartment she pulled off her clothes and stepped in the shower, washing off the stench of cigarette smoke and the grime of poor decisions. Slipping under the covers a few minutes later, warm in a set of pajamas Ellie had given her for Christmas one year, she tipped her head back against the wall and closed her eyes. She had either gotten old or wise or maybe both. Either way she didn’t know how to handle this new place in her life where she wasn’t a partier anymore but also wasn’t exactly domesticated.

She groaned as her phone dinged. No. She refused to talk to anyone else. It was probably Jessie asking where she’d disappeared to anyhow. Then again, Jessie was probably already making out with one of those men and had completely forgotten about her.

She rolled to her side and opened one eye to look at the phone.

Ben: Hey, worried about you. I thought I’d go to the AA meeting this week in Spencer. Want to join me?

This guy was supposed to be her boss. What was he doing, trying to be her friend too?

She turned the light off by her bed and rolled back to the other side without answering him. With her eyes closed, though, her mind replayed that night with Evan, then with Jeff, then back to Evan. She rolled back to her back and pressed the heel of her hands against her closed eyes. The alcohol she’d had earlier still churned in her stomach. Now in her mind Lonny was telling her she’d stolen money from her mind. She sat up, gagging, wishing she’d never agreed to go to that bar.

A few minutes later she was doubled over the toilet, emptying the meager contents of her stomach while her phone rang.

Stumbling back to her bed, she reached for the phone. The call was from a number she didn’t recognize. She turned the phone off, laid down and fell into a fitful sleep plagued by blurred images of past mistakes.

Book review/recommendation: The Do Over by Sharon M. Peterson

Book: The Do Over

Author: Sharon M. Peterson

Genre: Romantic Comedy/romance

DESCRIPTION:

“Look, you’re a nice girl but I don’t think we should see each other anymore.” The voicemail ends and I freeze in the dentist’s chair as I realize… I’ve just been dumped on live radio.

It took the most humiliating break-up for me to see that my life is in serious need of a do-over. Cue my anti New Year’s resolutions that even I can’t fail at:

Stop dating. (Men are the worst.)Stop trying to lose weight. (I’m never giving up chocolate.)Stop working so hard. (Selling mortgages is not my dream career.)Stop trying to live up to unrealistic expectations. (Start living my best life.)Stop trying to please my mother. (It’s not possible.)

But it turns out number five is harder than I thought, as she begins her campaign to get me back with my ex. So, what’s the perfect solution to keep her out of my love life? An imaginary boyfriend—at least he was supposed to be imaginary until I blurted out my neighbor’s name…

Nate, the bad boy next door with gorgeous hazel eyes, a razor-sharp jawline and a mysterious scar, might be hot, but he’s definitely not my boyfriend. Now all I need to do is stick to my resolutions while also keeping my interfering family away from my non-existent lover who has no idea that we’re fake dating. What could possibly go wrong?

MY REVIEW:

The Do Over by Sharon Peterson is the second romantic-comedy book I’ve read this year with this title but this particular version was a lot more fun, with a much more likable main character and love interest. Not only that but the icing on the cake was a sassy, Southern grandma who kept the humor level all the way to the top.

This book was a fun read, and I needed a fun read with all the stress in the world these days. It kept me hooked from the beginning and even though a couple of parts were a little predictable, they were predictable in an entertaining way. The main character’s full name was definitely not predictable but I’ll let you read the book to find out the story behind that.

Peterson promised a fun ride from page one and delivered on that promise all the way through. If a writer can make a dentist appointment a hook to pull this reader right into their book, then they have some talent. I hate dentist appointments, but I carried on through that first chapter because I just had to know what happened.

Every character Peterson introduced was likable or interesting in their own way, from the main to the minor supporting characters.

I’m not always a fan of the “fake boyfriend” trope in romance novels but Peterson handled it in a realistic way that didn’t leave me rolling my eyes.

She also managed to weave in social issues without making them preachy or letting them weigh the book down with unnecessary heaviness for a romantic comedy.

If you are looking for a fun, fast read that will leave you with a smile and make you forget your problems for a little bit, then this is a book I encourage you to pick up and immerse yourself in.