Mark P. Shea's Blog, page 1238

Shaking my head

I have to agree with this reader:

Fr Pavone goes on record about protests:

The current situation has been thrust upon us; we did not seek it, and we hope our actions so far have reflected adequately the respect we have for the shepherds of our Church. Be assured we are neither organizing nor endorsing public protests of any kind.

No, you just publicized them with tweets and Facebook posts.

I think he's right: his actions so far have reflected MORE than adequately the respect he has for the shepherds of our Church. Which is little, if any.

The poor guy is destroying everything he worked for. It's a frightening illustration of that whole wood, hay, and stubble thing from St. Paul, about how our works will be tested. I wonder if I could pass such a test? Keep praying.

Hey Western Washington!

Come hear Barb Nicolosi, Patrick Coffin, Teresa Tomeo and a bunch of other great speakers at Holy Family in Kirkland, November 4-5! It looks like it's going to be great!

Prayer Request

A reader writes:

Pray for a young man and his wife and their three children who are experiencing severe marital and job stress. Pray that the husband and wife will be united in love for one another and that the husband will be given grace to do his job with confidence.

Father, hear our prayer through your Son Jesus Christ. Mother Mary and St. Joseph, pray for them and all who love them. Pray especially for their children!

What Pope Benedict Calls the "Dictatorship of Relativism"...

is a civilization-wide effort in the West to get rid of the Big Laws (summed up in the Ten Commandments). It is a bipartisan effort that reaches across the aisle and makes friends of Herodians and Pharisees, Pilate and Herod Antipas, Hitler and Stalin, Obama and Cheney, post-Christian Britain and Eurabian Europe and other unlikely partners in a sort of Satanic Ecumenism.

The hope of such efforts, here in the post-Christian West is "freedom". The practical result is sketch by the Prophet Chesterton: When you get rid of the Big Laws, you don't get freedom. You don't even get anarchy. You get the small laws.

Exhibit A.

Our government is now in the business of enforcing foreign laws that even the foreigners don't care about. Nothing is too small to escape Caesar's all-controlling hubris. When there's no God to entrust the world to, our rulers have to do everything, because the unenlightened cannot be trusted.

From our "Not Ready for Civilization" file

Bronze Age Savages are, once again, in the news:

A teenage Pakistani Christian girl who misspelt a word while answering a question on a poem written in praise of Prophet Mohammed was accused of blasphemy and expelled from school, according to a media report on Sunday.

Please pray for Christians living under this demonic culture of brain-dead repression.

669 Followers!

Today, my minions, is a good day to polish my reputation as a cruel and sociopathic Dark Lord. To wit, I present the following, which will hurt you more than it hurts me:

1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

3. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.

4. A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

5. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm, and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."

6. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

7. "Doc, I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home."
"That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."
"Is it common?"
"Well, It's Not Unusual."

8. Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning."
"I don't believe you," says Dolly.
"It's true; no bull!" exclaims Daisy.

9. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.

10. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

11. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldn't find any.

12. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know, I amputated your arms!"

13. I went to a seafood disco last week...And pulled a mussel.

14. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

15. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says, "Dam!"

16. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Not surprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

17. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel, and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories.

After about an hour, the manager came out of the office, and asked them to disperse.
"But why," they asked, as they moved off.
"Because," he said. "I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer."

18. A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt , and is named 'Ahmal.' The other goes to a family in Spain ; they name him 'Juan.' Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."

19. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him (oh, man, this is so bad, it's good)...A super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

20. A dwarf, who was a mystic, escaped from jail. The call went out that there was a small medium at large.

21. And finally, there was the person who sent twenty different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.

It's a tossup between short and pithy 4 and elaborately groanworthy 19.

Feel free to add to the suffering with your own contributions in the combox. Remember: I always reward initiative by killing the funniest person last.

That is all!

Prayer Request

A reader writes:

I'll take this opportunity to request prayers for my next door neighbor, a helpful friend for nearly 40 years. He recently had surgery for a second round of cancer and soon will begin chemo. Unfortunately, he isn't religious and reacted negatively to the offer of people praying for him. His wife, however appreciates such efforts.

Father, hear our prayer that this man might know your complete healing in body, soul, and spirit. Grant skill and compassion to his caregivers and grace, consolation, peace, hope, and strength to all who love him. We ask all this through Christ our Lord. Mother Mary, St. Peregrine and St. Luke, pray for him. Amen!

A reader writes:

Please pray for me that I find paid employment. I am out of work.

Father, we ask that you would grant your servant a good-paying job where they can do good work. We ask that you would do this swiftly through Christ our Lord. Mother Mary and St. Joseph the Worker, pray for our Lord's good servant.

Day 7 of the Tin Cup Rattle: The Finale

If you like the stuff I've done please plink some shekels in the donate button on the left rail (or buy my stuff here.

And to all those who have been so kind and generous, I thank you from the bottom of my heart and pray God our Father bless you through our Lord Jesus for your generosity.  You guys are wonderful and it's a honor to know you (virtually speaking).

In Vitro Fertilization

enters the "How were we supposed to know?" phase of history with a lot of sick children.

HT: Mike Flynn