David Hadley's Blog, page 8

Pondering a Stoat

These days, Hartlepool Disembarkation is probably best known as one of the world’s first female Stoat Ponderers. Back in those days, stoat pondering was considered very much a male occupation. As with most things in the Victorian era, women were regarded as somehow too ideal to be considered capable of pondering anything quite as enigmatics

Plankton Thermocline’s Underwater Adventures

Plankton Thermocline was one of the late 20th century’s greatest explorers. We all remember watching Plankton Thermocline’s Underwater Adventures. This series was one of the first to show the delights and wonders of the underwater world in full colour on our TVs. With his custom designed wellies, Thermocline splashed around in some of the deepests

(Not) The Beast From The Swamp

It begins, slowly rising out of the swamp like a lawyer at dawn. We clutch our poking sticks to our chests in trepidation as the vague shape stumbles out of the mists towards us. Then, as the features of this unknown beast resolve themselves out of the heavy mists hanging over the swamp, we realises

University Fees and the Perverse Arts and Sciences

There is still much talk of late about University course fees and who should pay them and how much they should be. Obviously, we at the University of Little Frigging (formerly the cow shed at Little Frigging Manor Farm) are more than keen that the students should pay as much as we can get outs

Excessive Amounts of Baby Oil

‘Well…’ Now, isn’t this cosy? Just the two of us… well, apart from… y’know. ‘I’m a bit nervous.’ There’s no need for that, we are friends, after all, aren’t we? ‘Well…’ Can’t you say something a bit more interesting than just well, all the time? ‘You created me this way.’ I know, but I thoughts

The World in her Hands

She held the small blue green sphere in the open palm of her hand. It didn’t quite rest on her palm, but floated above it, revolving slowly. ‘What is it?’ I bent to peer down at it. ‘It is the world… this world.’ I looked up, around at her bedroom. ‘Seriously? Come on.’ Shenta lookeds

A Politics-Free World

Obviously, it is not that obvious… at least not from the most usual angles. After all, discretion is guaranteed in the adverts, and if you can’t trust the advertising industry, whom can you trust? Certainly not politicians, that is obvious from the marketing of this product. After all, who amongst us hasn’t wished there woulds

Medieval Woodland Perversions

Of course, many of you may be keen to learn more about the use of woodland perversions in a historical context. Rather than disabuse you of this notion, I thought it would be far easier for all concerned if I shed a little light upon a specific period of historical interest for your edification. Therefore,s

It’s a Job

Sometimes there are too many alternatives, too many ways to go. Possibilities multiply upon themselves with each potential choice. Sometimes there is no best alternative and it is a choice between the least worst options. Sometimes it happens that the choice offered is really no choice at all. Rella knew all this, and still shes

It’s Obvious

Obviously, the obvious thing to do here would be to start the sentence with obviously. Or would that be not quite so obvious as you’d think? After all, sometimes the obvious thing to do is not quite so obvious. Sometimes the obvious can be quite unexpected when someone is expecting the unexpected. As the actresss