Brendan I. Koerner's Blog, page 123

How Hard is the GED?

Back in our high school days, we often fantasized about ditching the classroom routine in favor of taking the GED test. (This daydream was usually strongest during double-period Calculus AB, by far the dreariest educational experience on the planet.) But the fantasy was always short-lived, in large part because of some negative stereotypes. The folks we knew with GEDs weren't the most impressive lot, and the buzz was that having the letters "GED" on your resume virtually guaranteed that your gla

Wings of Silver, Nerves of Steel

We're prepping to head downtown for the 20th anniversary screening of Do the Right Thing, a momentous occasion that has us on yet another '80s nostalgia kick. It thus bears mentioning that another great cultural artifact is celebrating an important milestone this year— turns 23! And what better way to mark the occasion than with the clip above. Seriously, we'll defend the grandeur of the show's opening theme until our dying breath. The Yngwie Malmsteen-inspired guitar solo that kicks in at the 3

The Ninety-Fourth

Tiny Togo joins the ranks of nations that have officially abolished capital punishment. Which means this list is now slightly out-of-date. Who will be next to do away with their (usually figurative) gallows? Our money's on Burkina Faso. Or maybe another small African nation that's trying to carve out better relations with Western Europe—the likes of Spain and France seem to make the ditching of the death-penalty a prerequisite for establishing tighter diplomatic ties.

The Not-So-Delicate Art of Shin-Kicking

There's a great passage in Luc Sante's Low Life, in which he recounts the 19th-century New York City spectacle of man-versus-rat fights. A human competitor wearing heavy boots was placed in a ring with a swarm of hungry rats, and challenged to stomp as many to death as possible without suffering terrible injury. It's quite a barbaric pastime, albeit one in which the primate usually emerged unscathed.

We couldn't help but picture that bloody spectacle upon reading Jason Couch's detailed account of

"More Imperfect Than Impermeable"

We're fond of gently mocking those who seek to make teetotaling a legal requirement. The Eighteenth Amendment, after all, is widely regarded as a notable (even noble) failure, and we certainly can't imagine life without the more-than-occasional bomber of Ballantine.

But does that mean all attempts at enforcing prohibition are doomed to have zero positive effect? That's a big question in Alaska's native villages, where alcohol abuse has long caused severe problems. That's led several village gove

The Piano Riff of Our Dreams

Apologies for the lighter-than-usual day on Microkhan. We're actually prepping for the third annual celebration of our legal link-up with the missus, so our thoughts are mostly elsewhere. Don't fret, we'll be back at full strength come Monday. Promise.

In the meantime, please enjoy the clip above, the discovery of which stems from Wednesday's Beatnuts post. We put out the call for someone to ID that piano-tinkle sample, and the commendable Matt came through like gangbusters. The riff in question

Werner Loves the Jiggle

One of our favorite means of procrastination is sifting through Nathan Rabin’s “My Year of Flops” series on The A.V. Club. That habit recently brought us in contact with this evisceration of The Real Cancun, which Rabin curtly derides as “a horrifying glimpse into the kiddie-pool-shallow minds of folks whose greatest ambition in life is to emulate the extras in Mystikal videos.”

To our complete shock, however, The Real Cancun has at least one notable fan who really should know better: the great W

Coup Four and a Half

In April, Fiji’s government declared a public emergency that has led to total media censorship, a ban on political meetings, and the sacking of judges. It’s increasingly clear that Commodore Frank Bainimarama, Fiji’s prime minister, intends for martial law to become permanent.

Fortunately, journalists are routing around the emergency rules on Coup Four and a Half, a new blog dedicated to disseminating info that Fiji’s censors would rather you didn’t see. Of particular note are the primary-source

Performance Decreasing Drugs

With so much focus on steroid scofflaws these past few years, it’s tough to remember that professional athletes are often forced to dabble in performance-sapping drugs, too. Such is currently the case with Spanish MotoGP star Dani Pedrosa, who’s been racing on painkillers since badly injuring his hip in a nasty spill. And while the pills enable him to sit atop his bike without feeling terrible discomfort, they also fray his reaction time by a few milliseconds—and thus consign him to more mediocr

A Fond Farewell to MJ

In the summer of 1983, my dad took me to the Sunset Boulevard Tower Records to purchase my first two audiocassettes. One was the eminently forgettable Cargo by Men at Work; the other, the legendary Thriller. By summer’s end, I knew every single lyric on that great album, and would watch MTV whenever possible in order to catch the “Billie Jean” video. A year later, when the long-awaited Victory Tour kicked off, I was distinctly jealous of a carpool-mate whose parents managed to score tickets for