Lindsay Lock's Blog, page 2

The Buzz on "Hamilton"

The sensational musical Hamilton is takin’ over my car with its trippin’ hip-hop beats and catchy lyrics. My kids sing/ rap along with the historical characters when it hits me... This shit is still relative today. Sure I got to spin some of it, but damn it’s so f*cking on point with modern day politics and life lessons in general.
1.      “The ten-dollar found father without father got a lot farther by working a lot harder, by being a lot smart, by being a self-starter...”
 Regardless of background, greatness can come from any person in many forms. 2.      “... We’ll never be truly fee until those in bondage have the same rights as you and me...”
All persons are deserving of the same rights, period. 3.      “We have to make this moment last, that’s plenty” and “Look around, look around at how lucky we are to be alive right now.”
Live in the present, act in the present, be grateful for the present. That’s all the time that’s guaranteed. 4.      “... When I meet Thomas Jefferson... I’m ‘a compel him to include women in the sequel!”
Gender equality matters. 5.      “We gotta make an all out stand, ayo I’m gonna need a right-hand man.”
Oftentimes, takes the efforts of many to achieve a goal. 6.      “Love doesn’t discriminate between the sinners and the saints, it takes and it takes and it takes and we keep loving anyway. We laugh and we cry and we break and we make our mistakes.” Other than the part about sinners, it’s true. Love doesn’t discriminate. Lin-Manual Miranda stated a similar sentiment another time: “Love is love is love is love is love is love is love is love, cannot be killed or swept aside.” 7.      “Write day and night like you’re running out of time...”
To me, this doesn’t mean write every minute of every day, but rather to make sure I write every day. There is something powerful about putting my ideas and voice upon paper or a screen. 8.      “No one else was in the room where it happened.” I feel like a lot of Congressional laws get passed this way– with the American people uninformed of what trades are being made in order to get laws made. Even if the average citizen wanted to know, laws are in legalese which is veryhard to understand. Lobbyists and interest groups further burden the process of wheeling and dealing. 9.      “It must be nice to have Washington on your side.” Now, I realize that this song is about President Washington, but it could figurative now mean Washington, DC which is equated which politics. In order to be a politician, one must have connections... usually both monetary and power in nature. The average citizen barred from entering big stage politics. 10.   “What would you do if you had more time?” Take our days as we have them to make a difference in the world.
Overall, Hamilton is a powerful musical full of lessons for life, love, loss, and politics. So we'll keep rappin' in the car.

On the Battleground

We all know we've been there... on the battleground with perfectionism.



Here is a short exercise I wrote in unarming it:



PERFECTIONISM: Really, you’re going to try that again? How many times are you going to try that?!
ME: As many times as it takes to get it where it needs to be.
PERFECTIONISM: But it will never be good enough...
ME: Sure it will be. You mean it won’t be perfect, but nothing ever is. I will be satisfied with meaningful and beautiful.
PERFECTIONISM: But not everyone will like that.
ME: I know. But it isn’t for them- it’s for me. It’s to soothe my soul and sing my song so that those who need to hear it can. Those who don’t need it, they can make or find their own song.
PERFECTIONISM: But some people may get angry at it...
ME: Yep, they might. The truth sometimes pisses people off, but it doesn’t stop it from being my truth; it doesn’t diminish the value of my truth.
PERFECTIONISM: Ah, ha, but you keep changing your truth!
ME: Yep, I do change it little by little as I learn and evolve. I forgive myself as I see the harms rendered in the past and resolve to move onto being a better person.
PERFECTIONISM: But not perfect.
ME: Nope, not perfect. Perfection, you’re not realistic nor healthy. I AM enough.  

From future self...

Dear beautiful soul,
You have come so far. I hope you see it because I do. You came out of the hard, through the fire, and arose as the phoenix you are. You are magical like that. You’ve rebuilt yourself time and again and you know that you can do it as many times as you need in order to get to the truest version of you.
You have loved, experienced loss. You have smiled in the rain and cried in the sun’s rays. You’ve learned from both what the world would call ugly and beautiful, but you understand there is no ugly as long as you keep your inner compass pointed to your heart. No experiences are bad. Yes, some experiences hurt like hell, but they too help you learn and grow into a better, more loving being. Because at the end of the day you are and always have been love, dear angel.
You faced the abyss with a rare heart full of hope because you saw you had wings that could soar through the darkness to reach the other side. Remember these lessons, dear one:
1.      Keep in tune with your conscience no matter what those around you may say.
Only you can see the beauty of your master plan.2.     Turn to fellow masters that understand certain parts of your plan when in need of guidance or reassurance, but mostly look within. The strength is there, it always has been. You are Athena: brave protectress of the heart and the downtrodden that will not suffer injustice to visit those you love.3.      Keep speaking your truth. By speaking, you give permission for those who are struggling to find their voice, speak, and live in their authenticity.4.      Everything is temporary. The knowledge of this helps you know that the dark never lasts and to enjoy beauty in your life while it lasts.5.      Your art and words are magical, so I hope you’re using them to speak your truth.6.      Laugh, live, love.7.     Love all parts of you always. Yes, all of it.
Wait until you see what’s on the other side. You’ll be amazed and love it all. And maybe tear up a bit. That’s okay too.

Love always,
Future me

Relevance of Mask-Wearing

            If all the world is a stage, then many a woman is a player. Jane Muir uses her mask to gain social status, Elizabeth I to reign in dignity and authority, Suyuri to enjoy life with the man she loves, and Viola to prove females are equally capable to males. Masks are vehicles to women’s success.  Jean Muir proves a rather dangerous actor who uses stereotypes regarding women to her advantage. Muir performs “...the feminine part that her society allows her” which includes “‘well-timed and careful staged swoons raptures, tears, and songs...’” thus acting out the perceived fragile female trope that wins the Coventry men’s hearts (qtd. “Blood and Gore”; Schewe). It is a sport in which Muir carries out revenge unto whosoever tries to resist her charms as well as win the patriarchal protection afforded in her society (Alcott). Feminist Luce Irigaray observes that Muir transforms her “‘subordination into an affirmation’” which kindles its dethroning in favor of a fairytale ending (qtd. “Blood and Gore”; Butterworth-McDermott). Alcott uses Muir to challenge perceived norms for females regarding their behavior and treatment (Butterworth-McDermott).
            Historically, women threw off patriarchal shackles similarly. In Elizabeth I’s speech, she provokes sympathy for her womanhood, but assumes the authority usually associated with manhood. Queen Elizabeth I admitted “I have but the body of a weak and feeble woman; but I have the heart of a king...” (“Speech to the Troops”). Elizabeth I declares herself capable of ensuring her people’s safety from shame, slavery, and death through her God-given authority equal to any king (“The Golden Speech”). Elizabeth I defied the patriarchal norm that insisted that women wed to be valued, a citizen, or exert influence.             Muir and Elizabeth I both object to restriction upon women; therefore, they made a new pathway to expression which breaks prior taboos (Butterworth-McDermott). Keyser points out that unmasking females exposes “‘the ugly features of patriarchy and [women’s] [skills] in confronting it” (qtd. Butterworth-McDermott). She performs like a high-class woman, revealing that “virtue and class distinction are not natural but learned” which may obscure rather than expose “personal and family history” (Shewe). In her performances, Muir challenges classism which initially places her below the Coventry family– she moves from pitiable servant to respected friend to head lady of the family (Alcott; Schewe). Likewise, the Coventry family’s self-made superior status is dethroned when they are fooled by Muir and they are forced to accept her.            Muir is not the only one to change her fate or social station through mask-wearing. In Memoirs of a Geisha, Sayuri uses the mask and role of a geisha to move from orphaned servant to maiko to geisha. “She paints her face to hide her face... Geisha is an artist of the floating world... The rest is shadows, the rest is secret” (“Memoirs of a Geisha”). Sayuri hides behind the mask of the geisha and uses it as a vehicle to find kindness, happiness, and love from the Chairman. Contrarily, Hastumomo who hid behind a similar gorgeous geisha face, but behind the paint lied a jealous monster that unleashed into ruin (“Memoirs of a Geisha”). Unlike Muir, Hastumomo’s anger and beastlike quality is exposed before she can benefit from its reaping.            A light-heartedly masked character was Viola from She’s the Man which was inspired by Shakespeare’s “Twelfth Night.” Viola pretends to be her twin brother, Sebastian, after her soccer team is cut so she can have a chance to play. The boys’ team thought she wasn’t up to playing at their level, and she wanted to prove otherwise. Her friend, Paul, is the only who sees that males and females are equally capable. Which ultimately gets proved by Duke as he exposes his ability to feel and want something deeper than a pretty face (“She’s the Man”). In this movie, gender roles get turned upside down as Viola proves a better soccer player than her brother and characters break norms exposing that gender itself is a mask.           The mask of what society dictates as gender constructs have been use for a long time in literature, history, and continue into modern media. Women can use the mask to show how ridiculous the gender constructs are as well as gain status in society.

Works CitedAlcott, Louisa May. Behind the Mask or a Woman’s Power.Seattle: Amazon Digital Services, 2012. Kindle AZW file.“Blood and Gore versus Hearth and Home.” American Public University System, n.d. Web. 25 Jul 2016.Butterworth- McDermott, Christine. “Behind a Mask of Beauty: Alcott’s Beast in Disguise.” American Transcendental Quarterly 18.1 (Mar 2004): 25-48).Memoirs of a Geisha. Dir. Rob Marshall. Perf. Ziyi Zhan, Ken Watanabe, Li Gong, and Yuki Kudo. Columbia Pictures, 2005. DVD.Queen Elizabeth I. “Elizabeth I’s Speech to her Last Parliament (The Golden Speech).” Luminarium, n.d. Web. 27 Jul 2016.Queen Elizabeth I. “Speech to the Troops at Tilbury.” Luminarium, 1 Apr 2012. Web. 27 Jul 2016.Schewe, Elizabeth. “Domestic Conspiracy: Class Conflict and Performance in Louisa May Alcott’s ‘Behind a Mask.’” American Transcendental Quarterly22,4 (Dec 2008): 577- 592, 609.She’s the Man. Dir. Andy Fickman. Perf. Amanda Bynes, Channing Tatum, and James Kirk. British Columbia, 2006. DVD.
          

I am

I am the spark in the dark of night,
The whisper of warmth in windy winters.
I am the light that shines at dawn,
and in the storm I am the calm.

I am where fear cannot reside,
I come in like the evening tide- washing away cares.
I am the tear upon the grateful face,
I am the memory time cannot erase.

I am the arms that rock babes to sleep,
I give rest to weary feet.
I won't settle for any lies,
I am the beautiful and the wise.

I peer through soles of grown men,
I see exactly where they stand.
I send a sweet shiver down a spine
when others perceive the power that is mine.

I am love.

Lifetime

Gears of life are always churning, turning.
Spiders’ webs constantly swinging, spinning.
Clock of time is clicking, ticking.
We hope for passion stirring, burning;
And brains bright yearning, learning.
Yet time still goes hang-gliding, flying.
Man goes to and fro driving, striving.
Beat of life is thriving, surviving.
Til’itstops.With dying.

Perceptions of Fear

Frightened aboutface when fronted feelings;
fear, fury, and forlorn are thought better served with spoon of silence. But dead air only feeds the heart’s doldrums, A cork can’t contain–
the encumbrance enlarges, envelopes him entirely until pressure preeminent presses
against the pursed lip.
Explodes.

Valiant brave their vulnerability; fear, fury, and forlorn tamed from lion to lamb if confronted. Challenge only strengthens the heart’s beating, A cork can’t contain– The power love can contain, it shines from her soul’s lamp brightly only multiplying as it goes forth

against the closed hearts.

Blooming.