Tif Marcelo's Blog, page 3

Run your race.

There's so much swirling around these days--so much devastation, so much news. It's unrelenting. It's overwhelming, but it forces each of us to refocus. If we took everything into ourselves, we would not be able to get up in the morning, we wouldn't be able to be productive.

We wouldn't be able to do good in the world. Which is what we need to do, in our families, in our communities. In ourselves. 

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I ran the Army ten-miler last Sunday. It was my third ATM, my first long race in about a year. I've been training since June; I thought I was ready. I went into it really confident that I would do at least as good as last year--which seems to be my consistent time--if not better, despite the rumors of the thick humidity in the air and the high temps. I'd survived Airborne School and Basic Training in summer humidity. Been there, done that.

Boy, I was wrong.

I barely made it through the ATM. At mile 6, I almost vomited, literally. I think I was on the verge of becoming a heat casualty. So I walk/jogged the last four miles. At the following water stops, I took 3 cups with me: drank one immediately, drank a second slow, and then carried the third through to the next water stop. My goal: not be one of those people hooked to an IV on the side of the road (there were a few I passed). Completion became the key.  

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Here's the honest truth about long runs, about publishing, about life, and the thing that keeps getting drilled into my thick skull: you are running your own race. Others are around you to cheer you on, and by golly, take the love. God is with you with all his blessings, and pray your hardest. You can pace off of someone, but you will find out soon enough that they will speed up and crawl, they'll dart around to get where they need to be. You'll also (and should) help others. I didn't realize I had a soldier (a woman out of uniform--she was in her unit t-shirt) pacing off of me, and when I slowed down in mile 8, a time when I really wanted to quit, she looked at me straight in the eyes and said, "Don't stop now. I've been following you this whole time."

Ultimately, they can't run your race, and you can't run theirs. Neither can success be interchangeable, because your definition of success may not be the same as theirs. At times, breaking one's personal record is the measure. Times like last Sunday, getting to the finish line on my own feet and not in the injury-wagon was the week's prize.

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Will I schedule another long race? Yes. Pending no injuries (I'm recovering from what I think is a foot sprain), I'd love to do another race in the spring. Because that's what we have to do as well. Get back up. Head back to train. Practice. Race.

My second child, or book, is here!

Our second son, C, was born 18 months after our first child. Rambunctious from the beginning in my belly, hard to deliver (vacuum extraction) and surprising us with a good two months of colic, he was the opposite of our first child. C marched to his own drum and humor.

He is still that way today.

His birth blew away my expectations of what a second child "should" or "would be" (whatever that means! HA!). The joy he has given me is insurmountable, though equal, to my other three children. 

I think most new parents inadvertently compare in the beginning. They compare their birth stories, adjust their expectations, until they transition into realizing that they did not get a duplicate.

They have a totally different baby. And life as they know it would be completely and utterly different, in all ways imaginable!

EAST IN PARADISE, my second book baby, is out today. It's the first written from start to finish while under contract; it challenged me and brought me to both frustrating and happy tears. The characters that came to me were utterly different than those from NORTH TO YOU, older and set in their ways. Bryn marches to her own beat, and Mitchell understands her enough to respect it. Bryn gets Mitchell to his core; with her, he can be himself.

I love this book. I love it in a different way than I do NORTH TO YOU. While I was writing it, I would find myself comparing the experience, sometimes comparing my heroines or heroes. Since my final turn in of proof pages a month ago, I'd gone through my transition and realized what debut series authors find:

No two books, even in the same series, are the same, just like no two romances will be.

But it doesn't mean these characters and their story aren't equally as amazing, as exciting, and as important as the first.

Hope you enjoy EAST IN PARADISE! Happy book birthday, Bryn and Mitchell!

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Links to purchase EAST IN PARADISE:

a* http://amzn.to/2vLQ5GS 

bn* http://bit.ly/2uDjyxk 

kobo* http://bit.ly/2hGZIQA 

Ten+ years blogging, and my only words about this week

My very first post on this platform was on August 1, 2007. Ten years ago, my oldest was six, and my youngest child, now seven, was truly just a wish in my heart. We'd just moved into a townhouse and I'd painted my boys' room a loud combination of primary colors--a townhouse we now live in once again, coincidentally. The Army has a way of bringing people back to old duty stations, and the DC area is a vortex. This is our third time in this area, making this tiny townhouse of ours truly a place my kids can call home. 

This blog has also been my home. It's the space where I've put my feelings down, and at one point in time, at least a couple of posts a week. But as I continued to write my stories out in fiction, my writing time here has been sparse. Because everything here, on this blog, is nonfiction.

It is truth as I know it.

So what's true for me?

I was an avid volunteer as a child. I enlisted in the Army at 17 after a summer in the Philippines, when I grew to appreciate how much we Americans have here in the country. I enlisted out of patriotism. I'm a mom of four mixed-race kids. I'm a wife to a military man who carries my same ideals--ideals that this country is every bit our effort to fight for.  And I do believe my husband and I have passed this sense of obligation to my children. My hope is that they will grow to serve this country through the military or volunteerism in their community. Everyday, I fight. I fight to keep hope in my family, to keep my marriage strong. Tiny struggles, big obstacles: ask anyone of my milspouse friends and they'll tell you the same thing. We fight in our own way to keep the Homefront stitched together.  

I pray, too, of course. But I fight with my everyday actions. I give it everything I have.

What does that mean, now with our current politics?

It means I continue to do what I have been doing, what I do best: I fight, within my sphere and energy and possibility. I fight by showing my children we all have a right to be here. I fight by teaching them history. I fight by giving them the breath of culture I can pass down.

I fight by writing stories that are true to my heart. I fight by sticking up for people who are hurt. I fight with my presence, with my contributions, with every word that leaves my mouth and fingers.

It's because I've had to fight for myself, to raise my chin when I've been discriminated upon. I've experienced good ol' racism, sometimes in the sweetest of ways that it hurts your teeth. 

Because there have always been these bad things in the world.

It's just that now, so many people who have been in the dark are seeing it. 

It's just than now, you can see what happens when people are silent when others stoke the fire of hate.

Lots of people cherry-pick MLK's words, and sometimes only focus on the word love. Well, listen, my friends. There are more to his speeches than love. He talks about the devastation of being silent. Of being too comfortable to be true good neighbors to one another. 

You have to love people enough to do something about it. You have to love humanity enough to want to make it better.

Love others just as God loves you. 

If you are the prayerful sort like I am, then that line should be enough.

The Eve Before a Debut

Tomorrow, when I wake up a little before 5 a.m., I will do so as a published author. In less than two hours, NORTH TO YOU, the first book of the Journey to the Heart series will hit the e-readers of those who preordered. It can be purchased and downloaded instantaneously. It can be read by anybody in the world that has an access to an e-reader and an online book retailer.

Tomorrow, I will also have to let go.

Tonight, I feel much like an anxious mama just before I let my babe walk into their classroom on their own, much like when I drop off my older kids at a new school.

There’s a lot of fear, though there’s also a lot of Faith that I’ve done all I can. There’s also pride and joy in anticipation of this baby taking flight. To share what I’ve put so much love into. There’s also hope that once it’s left my hands, it will come into its own, and be something to someone too. 

Tonight, I want to thank all of those who supported me on this journey thus far, those who had a hand in bringing me to this new fork in the road as a baby author:

Kate Dresser, Rachel Brooks, Stephanie Winkelhake, April Hunt, Rachel Lacey, Annie Rains, Sidney Halston, #5amwritersclub. My milspouse FRamily at the Army War College and the Big Red One. My book club sisters from Virginia, Kansas and Pennsylvania. My lovely friends in Northern Virginia who have made this area home for me. My dearest extended family and friends across the country. My immediate family in California. My dearest husband and amazing children.

Thank you, Future Readers, for taking a chance on me!

HERE WE GO!

(photo credit: Greta G.)

The last trimester, and a ***giveaway***

Two weeks ago, I turned in copyedits for NORTH TO YOU. Copyedits: the last time I can do any changes. Copyedits: the last moment when I see my work as a manuscript, before it becomes a book.

 

I might have sniffed a couple of tears when I sent it in. Because this last part, this last trimester before giving birth to my book baby might be the hardest part in which I feel the most helpless. This is when I wait. I wait and hope and dream that I've done enough. That I nourished this book with the proper words. That I watered it with sufficient emotion. That I strengthened it with plot and conflict. And I won't know these answers until my book comes out and it's in your hands. 

Up to this point, I've been overcome with such support. Online and off, I've felt your excitement and pride, and much of this last trimester is this--it's this amazing feeling of being able to share these characters and their love. As much as I want to see the end result of all this effort, I want you to have it in your hands too. Because that's why writers write: to share thoughts and concepts, to be able to talk about it, to agree or to disagree. To create conversation. And in this book's case, to spread a little bit of the love I feel for the special people in my life. 

I'm running a giveaway until the 16th of March! I've dubbed it the Take that Journey Giveaway. Besides my series name Journey to the Heart, I *so* believe in the hero and heroine's journey--in our journey--because the prize IS the journey and the journey IS the prize. 

Therefore, we should celebrate the milestones, right? 

To enter, all you will need is to click on this link:

http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/121997291/?

Winners will be drawn on the 17th of March!

Thank you for all of your support!

Setting the compass

My friend Judy took me on a few hikes on the Appalachian Trail last year. It was my first foray into hiking. A novice, I relied on her sense of direction and general know-how navigating the trails. Using the combination of her phone, a compass, some land navigation and well-marked signs on the AT, we covered a lot of ground. 

 

We always had a destination planned, a predetermined distance. But we had a couple of misfires, gone down what we thought was a trail and then backtracked. Another time, we came out of a trail much further than we expected, and walked a good four miles more than planned. But we took these changes in stride, confident we were headed in the right direction. Instead of fussing over the time lost, we spent it enjoying the view and basking in the experience.

 

Judy and I walked 8.8 miles on this hike. Yes, with beautiful gel-nails. 

 

 

Since I announced my book deal,  I've been asked the same kinds of questions:

Why now, Tif?
Did you always want to be a writer?
Why did you take up nursing if you knew you wanted to write since you could dream?  
Why get your Masters of Public Administration, then?

 

I love these questions--don't think I don't. I love being given the time and space to give credence to the dreams I had growing up. I'm forty-one with my debut book deal and I'm the proudest woman in the world, because I did exactly what my parents preached, and that's to keep moving. Just move. Just go. Just strive toward a general direction, and the rest will follow.

 

That included finding a major I knew I'd equally love to qualify for a college scholarship I needed. It included serving a country I believed in. It included getting married, having children, making money with my nursing skills. And learning and learning. And writing, and learning some more. It included harnessing experiences, overcoming struggle, and riding the story of my life that I could make into the books I needed to write.

 

In hindsight, I realize it was all for a reason.

 

So how does hiking on the AT have anything to do with writing?

Hand-stitched by me as a gift to my agent.
Pattern purchased from Octobersmorning , an Etsy shop.

 

 

My series title, Journey To the Heart, says it all, doesn't it? (You can thank my amazing agent for brainstorming this series title.)

 

Setting your compass doesn't mean knowing what's on the road up ahead. Sometimes, you might only be able to plot a short distance. Other times, you might be able to see as far as your mind's eye can dream, and the ability to forward plan feels so damn easy. Most of the time, it's about setting a course, and resetting it again when you realize you've come upon a chasm you can't leap over. Or a log doesn't exist where you need to cross a stream, and you've got to build yourself a raft.

 

It's okay to go all the way around. It's okay to rest for a little bit. It's also okay to create something out of nothing to survive, to get by, to be what you need to be for yourself and the people you love, even just for now.

 

But you have to get up. Pick a tree to walk to, find shelter to regroup. Approach the journey despite your insecurities and preconceptions and most importantly, your expectations.

 

Because sometimes it's you who's hardest on yourself. 

 

So set your compass, lace up your shoes. Get on the road.

 

I'll cheer you on from my journey.

 

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My first book, NORTH TO YOU, in the Journey to your Heart series is out on June 5, 2017. Preorder your copy here.

Happy New Year

I spent most of my day reading through my previous blog posts here on Halu-Halo. Years, my friends...years of logging down birthdays, anniversaries, milestones, moves, and projects. Over a decade of writing feelings out in public when the blogging community was tiny. I've shared so many of my dreams with you all. Lots of fears too, and doubts, and hopes. And quite a few New Years. 

I hope for 2017 to bring me closer to this space. This blog was always my ultimate accountability. I know that what I write here will be read by me, by my family, by you all, FOREVER. Now, if that doesn't keep a woman honest, I don't know what does. And frankly, I miss it here. I miss the creativity, the rambling. I can wax poetic and not have to edit (too much, hehe). And now, reading back at all those moments when I lacked sleep taking care of a baby, or in the sadness of missing a fur-baby, or simply, in relishing in the triumph of making something for me...I realized...this is my real legacy. My stories of my family and how it's grown and evolved.

2017 will also bring new families into this blog--the ones featured in The Journey to the Heart Series. The Marinos, Bautistas, Aquinos, Dunfords and Silvas. They'll all come into fruition in the two books coming out this year, and the third in 2018. They occupy my mind as much as my own immediate family. I love them just as much, too. 

On this first day of the year, I wanted to share the images that inspire NORTH TO YOU, the first book in the series. My heart squeezes when I think of the moment I'll get to share these utterly frustrating, sweet, stubborn, romantic, shy and assertive characters.

 

 I wish you all a Happy 2017! Let's make it a good one. 

When your chair turns...OR...my debut book deal

Are you a fan of The Voice?

My favorite phase of the show is the Blind Auditions process. The judges must decide if they want someone on their team simply by listening to them, without the knowledge of the contestant's age, look, and persona. And when a judge turns their chair, when they decide that that artist is exactly what they are looking--wow. 

It always brings me to tears. Because it takes a person's soul to expose themselves the way these artists do. To bear everything you've got in a two minute song, knowing that none of those chairs may turn, but with the hope that one will. 

Writers must endure this same type of rejection. A pitch, a query, a synopsis, a partial or full manuscript. Blood and sweat on a page, judged as good enough or not at all. But we keep submitting anyway. Because we want to be read--this is our expression of our legacy. 

You've read how my agent, Rachel Brooks, turned her chair for me in July. She was my 2016 gift, a wildly huge step forward in my goal--my dream--toward publication. She was worth the wait and all of the rejections, into the hundreds by the time I sent her my manuscript to review, was worth it. When she turned her chair for me, I was one of those contestants on The Voice bawling her eyes out, and pumping my fists all at once. Because through her, this would be my chance, gosh darnit. I was ready.

What I haven't written about is how fast Rachel and I ran from the starting gates. We bolted the moment the whistle blew. Tenacious, lightning fast, straightforward, and kind, Rachel guided me through my edits and the submission process. It was immediately apparent to me how our thoughts aligned, our wavelengths on the same frequency. Because of this, I never doubted the process an iota.

I kept writing to endure the wait. 

I didn't expect for my publishing chair to turn so quickly.

 

 

 

It reads: "Tif Marcelo's debut NORTH TO YOU, first in the Journey to the Heart series followed by EAST IN PARADISE and WEST COAST LOVE, wherein a San Francisco food truck owner has a second chance with her hold flame, but before he deploys he's helping his parents renovate their Filipino restaurant and drive away their newly parked competition, to Kate Dresser, at Pocket Star, in a three-book deal, by Rachel Brooks at L. Perkins Agency (World).

 

Yes! You're reading right! And I am still pinching myself. I will be published as a Simon & Schuster / Gallery Book Group author under the digital imprint of Pocket Star. My book will be cataloged with so many talented authors, and I'm so absolutely ecstatic.

I look forward to making beautiful words with the lovely Kate Dresser, editor extraordinaire. NORTH TO YOU and its following books, EAST IN PARADISE and WEST COAST LOVE are in capable, brilliant hands, and I could not be more thrilled. I step into this new phase unafraid and optimistic, hearts in my eyes. Not to mention, with fingers and scenes ready to go. The JOURNEY TO THE HEART series will showcase a cast of characters so close to my heart, and I cannot wait to share them with you as they find love in this complicated and sometimes silly modern world. 

One day I will tell you all the story of this long road to my dream--the wonderful forks, surprising bends and confusing detours. But today I will say that as long as you keep open for those hidden signs, listen to your conscience, tap into your grit, and maintain a death grip on your Faith, the dream will happen. Not exactly in the order you think, nor in the way you anticipated...but it will.

Ready, set...I have an agent!

It's been over a year, my friends, since my last blog post (I'll let you read it here). In March of last year, I was in a tough spot, creatively. My family life was in a wonderful flurry. Everything was right in every way, except for my writing, which for some reason I could not nail. I was getting up almost every morning, and owned the process as part of hacking through this path called publishing and I felt like I was failing miserably. And I needed a break from blogging. Instead, I funneled all my writerly efforts into the next manuscript, which I named TRUE NORTH.

Before that blog post, I had completed my sixth manuscript. Complete, meaning from Chapter 1 to The End, because I've had several stop and starts mid-manuscript, only to ditch the whole thing altogether. I'd only queried two manuscripts before TRUE NORTH, and with STITCHES OF TRUTH and ONE ON ONE, I amassed enough agent and editor rejection letters to carpet my house, but I wore them proudly. They proved my work.

Before then, I made the decision to pursue traditional publishing. I wrote with a purpose, with guidance from books and other writers. I made plans, and set goals. I met my critique partners. I learned to take rejection. I learned to call myself a writer.

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TRUE NORTH is my seventh completed manuscript, though only my third polished work. It took three times to get TRUE NORTH right, enough for me to revise. I couldn't put my finger on the problem. But the best thing happened to me in the middle of draft #3--I went to the National Romance Writer's of America Conference in New York City. There, I took every class I could fit in my schedule and I just listened. Watched. Absorbed. Took notes. I pitched for the first time. I met other people who were once in my shoes.

In New York City, I realized I was exactly where I should be. I was with my people. And what came with realizing this was finding my voice.

TRUE NORTH has my voice. My own voice. This book has Filipino characters. It has food. It has family. And lots of kissing (and more!). I owned up to a lot of fears drafting this book. While revising, I finished a Master's Degree but admitted to everyone my passion and drive would be focused on growing as an author. I resolved to fight tooth and nail to write better. 

I was ready for the rejections. Bolstered my self-confidence. But the responses I received when I began querying TRUE NORTH were surprising, astounding. My family was getting ready to go on a fabulous RV vacation; we were preparing for our 9th move. Knowing that querying took months, I hunkered down and prayed and kept busy and started writing my next book.

But instead of the form rejection letters, I began receiving requests. Feeling confident that my story had legs, I entered a contest called #pitmad run by Brenda Drake, where I pitched my book on Twitter. Yes, a whole book in 140 characters. From this contest, I received 2 agent requests. After letting those fly, we went on vacation to the Acadia National Park, where I entered another contest called Writers of Color and Native Voices (all from spotty wifi!), of which I was chosen as a finalist. I was so overwhelmed and happy in the middle of that beautiful forest, that I cried. I'd saved a copy of my manuscript on an old laptop and let those requests go in between s'mores and prayers.

No rest for the blissfully weary, we came back home and two days later we had movers at our door. Life became a whirlwind of putting out fires, sleeping on air mattresses and eating fast food. Moving isn't pretty. While I wondered about the status of my manuscript, then in the hands of many, I redirected my energy in settling my family. 

I was having a particularly tough day our fourth day in our new home. Our movers didn't show for delivery (ack) and I was at the orthodontist office with son #2 (double ack). I received an email from one of the #pitmad agents, and she requested that we speak to discuss my manuscript. I tell you, my friends, I about fell out of my chair. I decided that it would be a revision request, so not to get my hopes up. But that afternoon, after I begged my babies to pleasebequietwhilemommyisonthephone, I was offered representation. And I, in my glorious awkwardness, giggled and stumbled through words, and somehow managed to ask all my questions. After thanking her, I notified all the other agents of my offer. I received a second offer of representation. And in the last week I have been graced by the encouragement from even those agents who stepped aside. 

Finally, I am proud to say that I am represented by Rachel Brooks of L. Perkins Agency. 

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General stats! Because I obsess on them too! 

2010 - Misadventures of College Dating  - Drafted

2011 - The Long Road Home - Drafted and revised once

2012 - Stitches of Truth - Queried. Received over 100 rejections from queries & contests, and a combined 7 partial and full submissions.

2014 - One On One - Queried. Received over 100 rejections from queries & contests, and a combined 21 partial and full submissions.

2015 - draft #1 - changed up plot

late 2015 - draft #2 - changed up plot and characters (gah! You know that's serious!)

May 2016 - Began querying TRUE NORTH, for a combined 20 partial and full submissions from: Queries, PitMad and WCNV. Actual queries sent 18.

June 2016 - 2 agent offers

July 2016 - accepted representation

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What happens now? MORE WORK! MORE BOOKS! But partnered with and powered by an agent who believes in me and my work! I'm thrilled to be at this turn in the road. While I know there will be more rejection, more challenges, more learning (YES, the realist inside of me can't stop nagging), today I celebrate this milestone and thank some wonderful people! 

Critique partners: Steph Winkelhake, April Hunt 

Brainstorm sessions: April Hunt, Rachel Lacey , Sidney Halston , Annie Rains 

Contest angels: Brenda Drake, L.L. McKinney

Shout outs: Meredith Ireland , 5amwritersclub, girlswritenight, WCNV, pitmad, OwnVoices

My village, my husband, my children. my mama and daddy! God.

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Thank you for hanging with me through this long post! If you are reading this because you are a querying writer too...KEEP GOING! We will get to our dreams together! 

At the starting gates.

Sometimes, hypothetically, it takes just a minute to figure out a plot issue, and sometimes, well...it takes two completely different drafts and many many days of banging one's head against the keyboard. Then, this feeling of dread hits one smack in the eyes, that one cannot move forward at. all. , followed by the realization that letting go of a main *thing* might be the solution.  

It would be difficult to let go of this *thing*. It is huge--monumental. It's something one is attached to by the proverbial super-glue. But one knows in their gut it has to happen.

Finally, when one does this letting go...something crazy happens.

The story magically unfolds.

Hypothetically, of course. *winks*

 

That, above, is a blank Scrivener screen, to a whole new document. My notes are below it, after twenty-four hours of frenzy-writing. Not done yet with this kind of plotting, or more like a ohallthiscrapisspillingfrommybrain. But I'm maybe a day away from drafting my heart once again. 

It's such joy and agony all at once, knowing another version of this story (third draft...not revision, but draft) will drain from me. And where will it go? Who knows but on the screen, on this file in my computer, and maybe for someone-who-isn't-me will love. But all of it is a learning process of letting go, of leaving it all in hopes it will come back to me a better story. Writing in itself is a romantic relationship, and my readers would be my happily ever after.

So that's where I've been. Hiding inside myself, looking for this story that was I was too stubborn to see.

But I'm toeing the line now.