Delle Jacobs's Blog, page 2

I Saw vs. She Saw

What a difference the Point of View makes! (Wait for it...)

What I saw:                                                     What Pam saw:
A few minutes later--
What I saw:                                                       What Pam saw:

Walking Into Doors-With Flowers

Red HeliconiaSo how many ways can a person Walk into Doors? Several, it seems. And like Wearing the Water, they're all closely related. Answer coming up.

Pam, Delle, and the God KuOn Thursday, we took a long trip all the way around the island. And looking over my photos, I realize I have well over a hundred of them, so I'm dividing the trip into two parts: The Hawai'i Tropical Botanical Garden and The Volcano-Kilauea. I hope I can get some pics from Pam on the Kilauea crater, then find my older ones from 1991 and 2009, to show you how much it's changed. But today I'll take you into the Garden.

Monstera DeliciosaI first went to the Garden in 1991 when Hubbubs and I went to Hawai'i with another couple for their wedding on Oahu. Like most of the Big Island, everything resurrects memories.

The Hawai'i Tropical Botanical Garden, located in the Onomea Valley just north of Hilo, is a place of wonders, in its natural state a place of beauty, but in the hands of people who love growing things, something never to forget. The plants, the design, even the paths have changed in 22 years, yet everywhere I went, I remembered. That was a good thing. You see, Thursday was the 32nd anniversary of our marriage. And this was the first trip since Hubbubs passed away in January. So this was a day for celebrating the joy of the past.

Banana
The path into the valley is steep and I'm no longer good at walking uphill so I made arrangements to be hauled back out in the golf cart for that purpose. I noticed a lot of people made that choice. So I didn't feel so bad. There's a planked path into the valley, an improvement because it's hard to keep one's footing in wet gravel, and this is a very rainy part of the world.

Going down, we passed through a very cultured but natural-appearing jungle. The giant vine on the tree is a plant commonly called Split-leafed Philodendron. My dad would have a cow whenever he heard that because it's not a philodendron at all, but in fact is Monstera Deliciosa. He grew a giant one in our garden dining room in Illinois, and achieved a small miracle of producing one very incredible fruit that looked like corn and tasted like banana and pineapple combined.  It lives up to its delicious name.
Pink Ginger
And speaking of fruit, there are lots of bananas in the valley. I didn't realize they have such beautiful blossoms.

Ginger is common, but wasn't as visible as I remembered before. I loved this pink one, but never did see a good red torch ginger.

Spots of color were everywhere among the thousand shades of green. I've heard-and even though an anthropologist told me, I've been a bit skeptical-that some tropical peoples have no equivalent word for green. Instead they have many words for different kinds of green, not so much the shades of green as the plant or part of the plant the shade of green represents.
Window to a Spot of Color Close-up on the Spot of Color
Here you can see a spot of red I caught through the dense forest. I couldn't tell what it was, although I suspect it's ginger. I enlarged it, and still can't be quite sure so I won't name it. If I could see its leaves, maybe I could tell.

Phalaenopsis OrchidThere's an entire garden devoted to orchids, although nothing here grows alone. Orchids are often found growing on trees, as this Phalaenopsis does. My dad grew orchids too, and I've always loved them. I remember how Jeff was so amazed at all the orchids in the garden, growing in their natural settings.

Kelsy and the Peace LilyBut it was the flashy heliconia he loved most. There's a photo of him somewhere grinning widely as he drapes a bright yellow and red one over his shoulder.

Orange HeliconiaSomewhat like this flashy smile Kelsy is wearing. There are Peace Lilies everywhere. They're a common houseplant here on the Mainland-I have two. But I've never seen a blossom stalk as huge as this one, so Kelsy graciously bent down to let me compare the bloom's size with her face.

Don't know what this isThere's a beautiful koi pond, and a waterfall. My pics aren't so good of those, but they're worth seeing.

Onomea Bay At the very bottom of the valley I found my biggest memory. As I walked the path along the edge of the little bay, I remembered the way the tide had rushed in back in 1991.
Onomea Bay and Rushing Tide
I remember how in awe we were at the magnificent color of the sea, of the way the driftwood juxtaposed with the coarse rock, and how the sea gathered into the triangular bay and met the spot where the stream had cut its way downhill, fresh water meeting saltwater.

Where Sea Meets Stream Jeff's Daughter Pam at Onomea BayI remember wishing I could see it in full flow after a heavy downpour. There would be a small waterfall, and the wild surf would throw it back upon itself. There's still an overhang where the tide is slamming the rock beneath the falls' steep descent.



 Pam, Betty and Kelsy were wonderful traveling companions. And they understood how much this trip meant to me on so many levels.

Yes. Many happy memories. And now, many more.


But wait, I forgot my punchline again. So-- how many ways are there to walk into doors? Guess I was wrong-there's apparently just one: Having taken a gentle, cooling shower after yesterday's nasty sunburn, and stepping out of the shower, catching your shoulder against the plastic mounting trim of the door. Ouch, Kelsy!

Wearing the Water

My intrepid traveling companions Betty, Kelsy and PamAll of us ended up wearing the water yesterday, one way or another.

But more on that later. We went to the Waipi'o Valley, no mean feat, I tell you. It's a good thing, too. It's an extraordinary, remote place on the north side of the Big Island, and to get there, you drive on the main highway to a small town called Honopaa.






You can go down a narrow road to a lookout over the valley, but unless you have a four-wheel drive vehicle, you're not a allowed to go farther. Let's put it this way: it's not only illegal, but once down there in an ordinary car, you can't get back out.





Lest you think we're all a bunch of panty-waists, here are some facts: The cliffs surrounding the valley tower around 2,000 feet above it. The one lane road zigzags down the side at a 25% grade. There's a guard rail- a fairly recent addition. But the road has been used since the time of the original Hawai'ians. An ancient foot trail can be seen zigzagging up the cliff face on the opposite canyon wall. It's even steeper.




Our guide/driver told us about two young women who spoke little English that she found stuck on the trail in a downpour. She told them only four wheel drive vehicles were allowed on the road. One one of the women nodded pleasantly, pointed to the car. "Four wheels," she agreed.

Tracy with The Boys


Mules are very interesting animals. They combine the best of both donkeys and horses. They're very strong and smart, and they pull well. But yes, the wagon jerks into motion. And on the bumpy road, they plodded faithfully along, with the dogs running alongside. One of the dogs always goes the entire trip, and sometimes the other two do too.


Sorry no more explanations but everyone wants to get going now and I need a quick shower.


I'll post our volcano tour tonight if I can, but we fly back early on Saturday so the rest will have to come after I'm back home.
Oh yeah, Wearing the Water. Well let me tell you all the ways one can wear the water: accidentally stepping in front of the man holding the sprinkler hose at a garden; squeezing bottled water just as you remove the cap for the first time; stepping into a stray puddle when you're not looking; leaning over a railing to take a photo of the ocean just as a wave comes crashing in...  Horseback tours are also available.
There are a number of horses just outside this photo.ALOHA!!!


Taro farm with end of valley in background

Hawaii! There again!

So here I am on the Big Island once again! I'm here with three women, friends and relatives. Very relaxing. We don't have to do anything if we don't want to. And tomorrow we're going to take a mule drawn wagon tour through the Waipio Valley. I'll tell you more on that after we get back.








It's been a bit cloudy and we haven't been into the mountains or down to the beach yet. And there's an infinity saltwater pool I'm dying to try. But in the meantime, here's our condo. The goats in the last one are our backyard neighbors.





I also owe you the rock story. Maybe tomorrow when I've got a bit more ambition.

Patience, Please!

I'm working on a new look-that's actually an old look I always loved but need to revise. Either that or I'll go to a whole new look, which will mean going back to separating blog from website.

Place-holder "Rock" (Yellow Lucas Creek Agate)Now you know me-I have trouble keeping up with just one combined "webble", especially since I ought to be writing anyway. So doing both doesn't necessarily look like a good idea.

Getting someone else to do the website? I've tried that in the past. My problem is that I need to have more direct input, and need to be able to try out ideas and content. I drive webpage designers crazy. Or I forget to send them updates, or don't send because I haven't made up my mind, so I defer while going back to writing and cover design. So the update doesn't get done when someone else is in charge, either.

Guess I'll go back to playing around with the site. I'll be done soon. Promise. In the meantime, here's a rock to serve as a place-holder. I'll tell you all about it soon. It's special.

Thank you!
Delle

The She Cave Takes Shape

Dear friends,

I know you've been worried about me. I still get so many wonderful letters and notes, it really makes me feel safe and loved. I haven't been sick-a little sometimes, and I can't say I've been depressed. Sad is an under-used word and it is not the same as depression. Feeling loss, grieving, hurting from the loss-that's not depression, which is an ongoing condition. I think I can say I've under-estimated the grief cycle. But that's okay. I'm just letting that ride. I've learned well from so many social work clients, from friends who have suffered losses, and from friends who are wonderful professionals that I need to listen to myself, pay attention, and learn to let things be. That's working, although it's hard sometimes. I can be so very avoidant.

I'll have some new things to tell you soon as far as books and publishing go, but they're not yet ready for disclosure. In the meantime I'd like to share with you the long project that is nearing its completion, the conversion of the former family room (aka family dump) into a She Cave suitable for writing, cover art, even craft projects. It's a part of a huge reclamation project (sorry, Jeff, I still love you muchly, but you were such a mess-maker). The entire house is being relieved of its excess burden, and is getting a lot of fix-up, clean-up and even new building in small doses. (Today, brother John is installing new shelves in my closet. Last week he built hanging storage in the garage. New sprinkler system next week.)

But this is my special project, partially inspired by my daughter Lori, who built her own She Cave. There isn't actually a lot of new stuff. I had the bookcases built a number of years ago, and they hold maybe a third of my books. This is a cold room-it is the lowest point in a tri-level, and while it's wonderfully cave-like and cool in summer, it's hardly bearable in winter, so we're re-vamping a lot of things to change that. The fireplace is an electric heater. (I had to give up on wood smoke years ago). A lot of decorative pieces have been relieved from over-burdened places in the rest of the house, and these are mostly nostalgia pieces. The mini horse is a gift from friend SamMarie Ashe in honor of the novella we co-wrote, THE BOSS WORE RED.

The burgundy leather chair and ottoman is the one new piece, that I bought with my first Montlake check. I am so glad I did. It's the most comfortable chair I've ever had and perfect for writing. John replaced the top on my laptop stand which had been previously used outdoors and ruined by damp weather despite always being under shelter. His woodworking skills are wonderful. He can turn a piece of plywood into a thing of beauty.

The Van Gogh screen is turning out to be a great buy too. It wasn't expensive, but it's very versatile as well as attractive. The other side is "Starry Night", which I love as much as "Irises", the side visible here. You can't see my framed antique maps, of 1812 Europe. But you can glimpse the coaching prints on the narrow wall above the ceiling, as seen from the kitchen.

The daybed has sure moved around a lot. We had moved it down to the dining room for Jeff when he got sick, but then realized we would have to use this room. Before we could move it again, he had died. But that's what gave me the idea for changing the room's purpose.  On the  table closest to the fireplace, you see a white knitted table cloth. I knitted this maybe 20 years ago, using an old lace doily pattern on a larger scale. It's an odd yarn-maybe dacron-that is strong, washes well, and was extremely cheap, so I ended up with two different round tablecloths. The other one is Battenburg lace, which I found cheap years ago because it needed repairs. My cats used it for hide-and-seek, unfortunately, so once I finished most of the repairs, I put it over this file cabinet, and now they can't hide under it. It's old, fragile, and was probably never of great value, but I love it, and will keep on working until all the hundreds of thread breaks are fixed.

Frankie Blue-Eyes and Jinx have taken over, you can see. But they'll get bored soon. It's already become my favorite place. They'll come around for treats and occasional love laps. And now I have to get back to writing. Thanks for dropping in to my cave!

HIS SECRET HEROINE Released!

HIS SECRET HEROINE is finally available on Kindle! To give it visibility, I'me making it available FREE on Wednesday, March 14, 2013 only.http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00BS1FQ72

This book is a special one for me for several reasons, but I think more for Reggie, the quirky hero, whose energy and enthusiasm propel him in so many ways. There's also a strange (but not kinky) relationship between Chloe, the heroine, and Reggie's father, because the man has got a screw loose and only Chloe can help him find it. But he won't go easily into his own salvation. He's a man who needs to control everything, especially his family. And Chloe unwittingly is the biggest obstacle the duke has ever met.

This is not a story about death and grief, although it does have its sad moments. But it is about getting past the grief and finding new directions. And it's about control getting out of control. And about learning to accept that sometimes to change things we have to stop trying to change things.

Some other time-maybe even this week if my life will just settle down a little, I'll tell you a bunch of stuff about Reggie's boat and how it went from a brig in the original published story, LADY VALIANT, to a topsail schooner, and finally became a ketch. And why.

DOING BETTER

Dear friends, I must thank you for being so patient with me. The past several weeks have been extremely difficult, but we're moving onward. As you might know, my beloved husband Jeff passed away on January 19. If there is a blessing, it is that all of us were deprived of what could have been a very long and painful illness. It was shockingly quick. And sometimes still I feel like it's not real, that he's going to be coming back, and he'll be so mad at me for giving away his things.

It's okay. Really. I know how it has to be. I've counseled many grieving people in my life, and I know the pathway grief must take.

Many, many thanks to my friend Dr. Debra Holland for her wonderful book, THE ESSENTIAL GUIDE TO GRIEF AND GRIEVING . And many, many thanks to all the friends, relatives, close professionals and fans, even the many people on Face Book and other social places who have stood by us. Don't ever let anyone tell you those condolences from distant people you have never met have no meaning. They do.

Now it's time to get back to work. I have several overdue covers, and must finish them. And I'm determined that my next indie book title-changed yet again, to HIS SECRET HEROINE, will be finished and published. I'm setting my own deadline of March 1, and I think I can make it.

So off to it now!

A few memories

I have tried today to tell everyone how much I appreciate the love and kindness they have sent in their condolences. I've always thought I was strong, but today I know I am not. Instead, my fingers touch the keys and they shake. And yet again I burst into tears. He was my great love. For many, many reasons. He always will be. Perhaps tomorrow will be easier. My thousand friends, I love you too, and you touch me so deeply because of who you are, and also who he was, is, to me.

Someone sent me a quote from Khalil Gibran: "When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight."

Sad Tidings

My dear friends, readers and fellow authors,

I think you won't be hearing much from me for awhile. As I'm sitting in the hospital room, I'm watching Jeff sleep, and am glad for it. He's on a lot of drugs today, and the nurses tell me they think the drugs are just hanging on a bit longer. It's very hard to be hopeful at this point and the best I can pray for is that whatever happens will be for the best.

I'm not going to give you hundreds of updates or anything like that. You don't need every gory detail-neither do I. But I just want to let you know that right now I have to put all my concentration on family because all of them need me to help them and I need them to help me. /and Jeff needs all of us.

Hugs and many thanks.
Delle