Jakub Trpiš's Blog, page 2
April 7, 2020
How to keep a cool head under quarantine — seven tips
1. It's not your fault
This might sound odd, but a lot of people start to blame themselves. At home they argue with their spouse, because they have a small…
This might sound odd, but a lot of people start to blame themselves. At home they argue with their spouse, because they have a small…
April 12, 2019
Interview with the author
The Choice looks like a great inspirational work of fiction. Any plans to make it into a series?
I don’t want to write never-ending series without a profound…
I don’t want to write never-ending series without a profound…
October 30, 2018
The way to a perfect relationship
Despite the fact that hundreds of books were written about two people living together, how many couples can actually say that they are completely happy? Does…
The four most important things in life
What do we need in order to be truly happy in life? If we leave out money (we’ll talk about money next time), what is really important?
1. A job
We all need…
1. A job
We all need…
Addiction to another person
We can completely stop growing as a person when we fall in love with the wrong one. We have to face the same problems as any other addicted person. Maybe even…
October 12, 2018
The four most important things in life
What do we need in order to be truly happy in life? If we leave out money (we’ll talk about money next time), what is really important?
1. A job
We all need self-realization. We don’t necessarily have to speak about the concept of job as we all know it. You can or you don’t have to be paid for it (if you have some other substantial income). However, it is an activity which you do for the better part of the day and you should always aspire to be perfect in it. Ideally, you will use your natural talent and get paid for it. In other words, do what you love. If you love it, you will get better day by day and eventually become a true professional. If you have a job you don’t like, approach it as an interchange on your way to something better. The goal should be a fulfilling job.
2. Partner
Apart from a small percentage of people who are happy to live without a relationship, people are made to live in couples. Your partner should complement you and you should complement your partner. The leader of the relationship should be the one who’s the mentally stronger in that particular time. Such thing should naturally change. Of-course there isn’t an ideal partner so you will always struggle even a bit. On top of that, people evolve while in a relationship. Try to accept the “new self” of your partner. Love your partner for what he/she truly is.
The idea of a lifelong relationship is beautiful but the truth is that such thing is very rare. But who knows, it might be you … For the rest of us – if our partner wants to go away, we should accept it. It also works the other way around. If your relationship doesn’t fulfil you anymore, leave. The more free you feel in a relationship, the more fulfilling the relationship will be.
Tip: Read the article about the perfect relationship
3. Friends and family
Some people cherish family more, while other people cherish friends more. It doesn’t matter how we call these people. They are all our close ones. We spent a lot of time with them and they affect us in many different ways. You want to know where you’ll most likely find yourself in 5 years, take a look at your 5 closest ones. Besides our partner, these people know us better than anybody else. Sometimes, they might know us better than we even know ourselves. They know how to cheer us up when we need to, or point us to the right direction. As they say: “A friend in need, is a friend indeed.”
4. Health
As they say: “A healthy person has thousand wishes, but a sick person has only one.” Take care of your body. Exercise. Not only it’s a great prevention against being sick, but it also revitalizes your mind.
The four pillars of a happy life
In practice, you need to focus on all 4 of the above. You should never rely solely on your partner. If you split up, you’ll end up with nothing. Your friends will help you with your relationship problems and give a helping hand if things go wrong at work. When fully committed to your job, you don’t have time to think about relationship problems. It also works visa-versa. Missing your partner too much will negatively affect the relationship with your friends and work won’t make you happy. If you have no partner and no friends, you are in for a big trouble.
That’s why it is truly important to focus on all 4 pillars. You have no idea how much it can pay off one day. Generally speaking, only prospering in all 4 aspects (pillars) will make you truly happy. Build firm bases that can help you through thick and thin.
You can find more articles on author’s official website https://www.jakubtrpis.com/
1. A job
We all need self-realization. We don’t necessarily have to speak about the concept of job as we all know it. You can or you don’t have to be paid for it (if you have some other substantial income). However, it is an activity which you do for the better part of the day and you should always aspire to be perfect in it. Ideally, you will use your natural talent and get paid for it. In other words, do what you love. If you love it, you will get better day by day and eventually become a true professional. If you have a job you don’t like, approach it as an interchange on your way to something better. The goal should be a fulfilling job.
2. Partner
Apart from a small percentage of people who are happy to live without a relationship, people are made to live in couples. Your partner should complement you and you should complement your partner. The leader of the relationship should be the one who’s the mentally stronger in that particular time. Such thing should naturally change. Of-course there isn’t an ideal partner so you will always struggle even a bit. On top of that, people evolve while in a relationship. Try to accept the “new self” of your partner. Love your partner for what he/she truly is.
The idea of a lifelong relationship is beautiful but the truth is that such thing is very rare. But who knows, it might be you … For the rest of us – if our partner wants to go away, we should accept it. It also works the other way around. If your relationship doesn’t fulfil you anymore, leave. The more free you feel in a relationship, the more fulfilling the relationship will be.
Tip: Read the article about the perfect relationship
3. Friends and family
Some people cherish family more, while other people cherish friends more. It doesn’t matter how we call these people. They are all our close ones. We spent a lot of time with them and they affect us in many different ways. You want to know where you’ll most likely find yourself in 5 years, take a look at your 5 closest ones. Besides our partner, these people know us better than anybody else. Sometimes, they might know us better than we even know ourselves. They know how to cheer us up when we need to, or point us to the right direction. As they say: “A friend in need, is a friend indeed.”
4. Health
As they say: “A healthy person has thousand wishes, but a sick person has only one.” Take care of your body. Exercise. Not only it’s a great prevention against being sick, but it also revitalizes your mind.
The four pillars of a happy life
In practice, you need to focus on all 4 of the above. You should never rely solely on your partner. If you split up, you’ll end up with nothing. Your friends will help you with your relationship problems and give a helping hand if things go wrong at work. When fully committed to your job, you don’t have time to think about relationship problems. It also works visa-versa. Missing your partner too much will negatively affect the relationship with your friends and work won’t make you happy. If you have no partner and no friends, you are in for a big trouble.
That’s why it is truly important to focus on all 4 pillars. You have no idea how much it can pay off one day. Generally speaking, only prospering in all 4 aspects (pillars) will make you truly happy. Build firm bases that can help you through thick and thin.
You can find more articles on author’s official website https://www.jakubtrpis.com/
October 11, 2018
Addiction to another person
We can completely stop growing as a person when we fall in love with the wrong one. We have to face the same problems as any other addicted person. Maybe even worse, as being addicted to another person is not being discussed sufficiently. How to overcome such addiction?
A good friend of mine is addicted to her boyfriend. He treats her really bad, doesn’t respect her and uses her. Every time we talk, she is convinced her boyfriend cheats on her.
She literally withers away a bit more every time we see her. We try to convince her this is not a way to live a happy life. Despite the fact that she admits it, she also says she is still in love and can’t live without him. This has been going on for two years now! A confident, beautiful woman has turned into a wreck. Completely blocked, up, she doesn’t let the people around to help her, criticizes everything. Her productivity at work is now worse and above all, her health is now worse too.
How to get rid of such addiction?
1. Take precautions
I think we all have this experience. However, it never ended up the way my friend’s relationship did. Because we know how such addiction looks like, we are able to pull the handbrake and take certain precautions.
2. Admit you have a problem
If you can’t imagine leaving your partner, friend or family member, it means you are addicted. Their presence is such an important thing to you, that you can’t spend the day without calling or texting them. You constantly think about them and forget about yourself. The symptoms are exactly the same as if you were madly in love. The problem is that being in love slowly fades away and it evolves into something more grown-up, however, addiction is getting worse and worse. Every person wants to love and be loved but nothing should be taken too far. Especially when your partner doesn’t love you. Admitting you are addicted is the most important step to overcome it.
3. What if we are truly addicted?
Our mind is our strongest weapon so it’s crucial to learn how to use it right. You need to convince yourself that you are ready to get rid of the problem. As soon as you make this crucial decision, things will start to change. Tomorrow, you will have to make another decision. You need to remind yourself that you wish to be single at all times. No matter what. Go and have lunch with an ideal couple in which two people truly love each other. You will see first-hand how beautiful your life could be after you get rid of your addiction. Not necessarily of the person you love, but of your addiction. It’s not always a solution to get rid of the people you care about, but it’s crucial to stop thinking you can’t live without them. However, the truth is, that it’ll be far more convenient for you to stop seeing that person for a while.
4. Change your stereotype
Make new friends. Visit places you haven’t visited yet. Don’t take the same old route to your work. Simply, do everything so your life isn’t the same as it was yesterday.
5. Educate yourself
Various books and articles were written on this topic. There are also groups on social media able to help you. You might encounter people who had already overcome this problem and can offer valuable advice. At the very least, you’ll find out you are not alone in this. If nothing helps, don’t be afraid to visit a psychologist. When you have angina, you visit your doctor too, right?
Tip: Read the article about the perfect relationship
Most of us aren’t pathologically addicted
The example of my good friend is extreme. We all have our own way on how to deal with addiction, once the addiction crosses the healthy line. Of-course we all are addicted to our close ones to a certain extent. It would be odd if we wouldn’t. It’s important to realize that there was always a person who loved us and whom we loved, and there will always be. We can’t stick to one single person. True love doesn’t lead to addiction, on the contrary, it makes us more independent.
What should we do in case someone close to us is addicted? Besides talking through the matter with the particular person, supporting the person and showing he/she is not alone… you can do nothing. It’s up to each person to decide when a traumatic relationship ends.
You can find more articles on author’s official website https://www.jakubtrpis.com/
A good friend of mine is addicted to her boyfriend. He treats her really bad, doesn’t respect her and uses her. Every time we talk, she is convinced her boyfriend cheats on her.
She literally withers away a bit more every time we see her. We try to convince her this is not a way to live a happy life. Despite the fact that she admits it, she also says she is still in love and can’t live without him. This has been going on for two years now! A confident, beautiful woman has turned into a wreck. Completely blocked, up, she doesn’t let the people around to help her, criticizes everything. Her productivity at work is now worse and above all, her health is now worse too.
How to get rid of such addiction?
1. Take precautions
I think we all have this experience. However, it never ended up the way my friend’s relationship did. Because we know how such addiction looks like, we are able to pull the handbrake and take certain precautions.
2. Admit you have a problem
If you can’t imagine leaving your partner, friend or family member, it means you are addicted. Their presence is such an important thing to you, that you can’t spend the day without calling or texting them. You constantly think about them and forget about yourself. The symptoms are exactly the same as if you were madly in love. The problem is that being in love slowly fades away and it evolves into something more grown-up, however, addiction is getting worse and worse. Every person wants to love and be loved but nothing should be taken too far. Especially when your partner doesn’t love you. Admitting you are addicted is the most important step to overcome it.
3. What if we are truly addicted?
Our mind is our strongest weapon so it’s crucial to learn how to use it right. You need to convince yourself that you are ready to get rid of the problem. As soon as you make this crucial decision, things will start to change. Tomorrow, you will have to make another decision. You need to remind yourself that you wish to be single at all times. No matter what. Go and have lunch with an ideal couple in which two people truly love each other. You will see first-hand how beautiful your life could be after you get rid of your addiction. Not necessarily of the person you love, but of your addiction. It’s not always a solution to get rid of the people you care about, but it’s crucial to stop thinking you can’t live without them. However, the truth is, that it’ll be far more convenient for you to stop seeing that person for a while.
4. Change your stereotype
Make new friends. Visit places you haven’t visited yet. Don’t take the same old route to your work. Simply, do everything so your life isn’t the same as it was yesterday.
5. Educate yourself
Various books and articles were written on this topic. There are also groups on social media able to help you. You might encounter people who had already overcome this problem and can offer valuable advice. At the very least, you’ll find out you are not alone in this. If nothing helps, don’t be afraid to visit a psychologist. When you have angina, you visit your doctor too, right?
Tip: Read the article about the perfect relationship
Most of us aren’t pathologically addicted
The example of my good friend is extreme. We all have our own way on how to deal with addiction, once the addiction crosses the healthy line. Of-course we all are addicted to our close ones to a certain extent. It would be odd if we wouldn’t. It’s important to realize that there was always a person who loved us and whom we loved, and there will always be. We can’t stick to one single person. True love doesn’t lead to addiction, on the contrary, it makes us more independent.
What should we do in case someone close to us is addicted? Besides talking through the matter with the particular person, supporting the person and showing he/she is not alone… you can do nothing. It’s up to each person to decide when a traumatic relationship ends.
You can find more articles on author’s official website https://www.jakubtrpis.com/
